Legally Friends

Episode 11: "Why Would She Do That to Her Face?" + Most Likely To: In-Law Edition

Legally Friends Season 1 Episode 11

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0:00 | 49:09

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Emily is back from CO2 laser surgery looking like Frankenstein — and Zach's classmates won't stop asking him about it. Amy went barrel racing in Colorado and actually competed. Zach found a house in Dallas. And then we try a brand new segment: Most Likely To — In-Law Edition.


Things we cover:

• Emily's surgery recovery — bloody tears, drains, and why people are judging her

• Amy's barrel racing jackpot competition (she's going for the Draper Rodeo next)

• Zach looked at 14 houses in 2 days — "everyone else is disgusting"

• Amy calls out Emily for never visiting her in 4 years

• Ranking the sisters (ties are NOT allowed)

• NEW: Most Likely To — In-Law Edition (who gives unsolicited advice? who shows up unannounced?)

• Amy snaps at Emily mid-episode: "If it's not about you Emily, you don't care"

• Judge & Jury: MIL gives a gift card to a store you've never shopped at

• Judge & Jury: Father-in-law only thanked the husband for raising a good family

• Taylor Frankie Paul / Bachelorette breakdown — ABC knew everything

• Secret Lives of Mormon Wives gossip


Submit your in-law dilemma: legallyfriendspodcast@gmail.com


Listen on YouTube for the full video: https://linktr.ee/legallyfriends

SPEAKER_00

Welcome back to Legally Friends and welcome back to our gorgeous, gorgeous kitty cat, Emily. Thank you for joining us again. You look you're looking a little kitty-ish, but that's okay. We're so happy to have you back and that you're alive and well. I'm back, bitches, and I look like a cat. I'm very swollen. And I had a complete crash out last night. I called my doctor. Rachel was like, You're so embarrassing. How dare you call your doctor? I I've called him five times in the last two weeks. You might be his most difficult high maintenance patient. I asked him, I said, Am I your most difficult annoying patient? And he said, Not even close.

SPEAKER_02

No way.

SPEAKER_00

He said, Not even close. Well, he probably tells everybody that. Like he's not gonna be like, Yeah, you suck. Yeah, I'm loving my eyebrow placement. I think it's a slay. But my lower blef, I was not expecting it to be pulled so tight. He explained to me why it is. So basically, there's this thing that serial killers have where the under of their eye right here flips out. You find us a picture. Okay, do you see this guy's eyes? How like the white is flipped out? Oh yeah. Basically, what he said to me is he stitches the flap down underneath here and pulls it tight so that doesn't happen. It fades over six to eight weeks. I'm on two weeks right now. So I'm I'm 16 days out. And so it that stitch will hold it really tight for six to eight weeks and then it goes back to normal. I've done my research, that's what it says, but that's why I'm pulled so tight. But he swears to me. Last night when I was like literally like having a complete mental breakdown, he was like, I promise you your eyes, your eye shape will be back to normal. You're pulled really tight. A lot of people that get facial surgery have mental breakdowns and crash outs because they're so nervous about the results, just like I am right now. But he's like, I promise in three months you'll love it. It's gonna be a long three months, sweetie.

SPEAKER_02

There's a lot more crash outs to come.

SPEAKER_00

Because I right now, like, I would not be okay with how this is. And like you, yeah, you can even see down here, like I'm so swollen still. Like my nose looks big, my cheeks look big, like everything just looks big. I feel like I could like press your forehead in. Yeah, like it's so swollen. I feel like I could like press on it and it would like in the bottom. And my eyes right here, you guys, they still hurt so bad. Like, even when I wash my face, it hurts. Like barely the touch of it hurts. And last night I was sleeping with London, bam, elbow in the face. Yeah, no, no, yeah, really bad.

SPEAKER_02

I feel like this is like the toughest time because you're starting to feel like you look a little more normal, but you don't. Or like when you have the when you have the bruises and stuff, you're like, oh, I'll be fine, I'll look better, whatever. But now it's in the transition where you're still a little swollen, not everything's right.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, like do you guys remember when Jessie Draper like posted her Instagram where she was like, This is not how I want to look. I'm not okay with this. But now she looks incredible. She's still not happy with it. I just listened to her call her daddy episode while I was getting ready, and she was like, She was still saying, like, I wish I never would have done it. She didn't like her fat grafting, which I didn't do any fat grafting.

SPEAKER_02

What is that?

SPEAKER_00

She like put fat underneath her eyes. Yeah, they pull fat from like your boobs or your stomach or your legs and they put it underneath your eyes. Like, so you see how my eye, I have like a bag right there. Because I'm an old bag. Like, if your eyes are like sunken in, they'll put fat to like push, like, plump it back up. Yeah. But I've heard that that's like now like you don't want to do that. Yeah, it can get lumpy. Yeah, my doctor was like, I would not do fat transfer on you. So he just pulled it really tight. But like you can even see, like, can you see the scar here and here? That will take some time. Like right there. Yeah, your eyes are so swollen, like your eyelids. Oh, it hurt, it's like so painful. But my skin is skinny. Oh, your skin looks incredible. This is CO2. The CO2 slays. So I remember when you were first, it was, I don't know, maybe like five days out, a week out, and you were like, maybe I shouldn't have done the CO2. Like, this is so painful. It was like getting itchy. Are you still feeling like that? Are you happy with everything that you did? I'm happy with the CO2. I'm happy with the brow lift. I'm to be determined on the lower bluff. But the CO2 is worth worth it. The the bark is worse than the bite. Like the first three days, I couldn't even feel the CO2. I could have cared less about that. I had a headache. Day four, my neck got itchy. Look at that fresh baby skin. So I was itchy for like three days and then I was fine. Do you think the CO2 could help with these lines right here? Yeah, it does help with lines. I gotta get that done. But like I am worried I'm very worried about my lower. I just hope it calms down. Or else I might have to go back in and have them loosen that up. Okay, wait, look, do I ready? Okay, so this is my eyebrows natural. Ready? Okay.

SPEAKER_01

No, don't do that.

SPEAKER_00

Amy, Amy, pull it from here. Like I like I'm trying to like lift it, but then my eyes kind of go crazy. Okay, yeah, you gotta lift from there. He said you want to take here and here and lift. You're too young.

SPEAKER_01

Don't do that. No, don't touch anything.

SPEAKER_00

No, not right now. I'm saying in like when I'm your age. Well, let's just see. Let's just see how this plays out. Because right now I'm a little concerned.

SPEAKER_02

Alright, I'm bored with this conversation.

SPEAKER_00

Okay, fine. Go.

SPEAKER_02

This is annoying.

SPEAKER_00

Okay, on to much bigger and better things. Really fast. Were you guys bored without me? We were thriving and having so much fun without you.

SPEAKER_02

And Megan was great. I loved having Megan on, so that was fun.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, there wasn't like the hole that was missing without you. No offense. Okay, can we talk about the Taylor Frankie Paul, Bachelorette, Dakota, Secret Lives, that whole thing. I need to debrief and I need to know what you guys think. Well, and Zach probably has no idea because he's like not chronically online like we are. Yeah. Okay, so do you someone give me the update? Tell me. Emily, you go. Okay, so you know, Secret Lives Mormon Wives. Taylor Frankie Paul. Her up her first episode of The Bachelorette was supposed to be on Sunday. They canceled it two days before because this recording came out of her arrest from was it three years ago? Yeah. Here's like something that does bother me. Well, her arrest because of domestic violence. Yes. It bothers me that ABC and The Bachelorette even cast her in the beginning. They knew they had the whole police report. They had that video. If they had the page report, they saw the video because that's where the video came from. Yeah, and the police report talks about all of this, how she threw the chair, it hits the daughter. Like we knew all this. This is not any new information. And also, if you go back and watch Secret Lives of Mormon Wives season one, episode one, that's how the whole series starts. It starts that way. It starts the whole thing. Like they take the bar stool. It's like you can't act surprised. It's like, why are we shocked? And then pulling her season.

SPEAKER_02

I thought there was new information that was brought out.

SPEAKER_00

So what it was, the vit we had heard about the video. We always knew there was a video. The public had not seen it. Two days before The Bachelorette was to air, somebody, aka Dakota. Dakota, the ex who was recording, he gave the video to TMZ. And TMZ leaked it and it was everywhere. And also, I mean, watching a video and hearing it and like hearing the daughter like scream and cry for her mom is horrible. It's horrible, like actually watching it and hearing that just being like, there's a video out there. So I'm sure when ABC, like, if they didn't see the video three years ago when they watched it, I'm sure they were like, oh crap, and they were in like crisis mode. But also they knew about all of these allegations with the domestic violence, and they knew the chair had hit the daughter because it's all in the police report. We all knew that. That's why I was so confused when they cast her in the first place. Because I'm sorry, she is in no position to be the Bachelorette. ABC for years has been a family show. So when they cast Bachelor and Bachelorettes, there's they are always looking for like America's sweetheart type of thing.

SPEAKER_02

Wholesome.

SPEAKER_00

I'm sorry, Taylor Frankie Paul is not America's sweetheart. And they knew that. They knew that. That's what bothers me. They knew that. That's it. It really pisses me off because they like put all this backing behind her because for like a hot second, Secret Lives of Mormon Wives was like the biggest show. And I'm sure ABC wanted more ratings for The Bachelor. And so they were like, let's cast Taylor Frankie Paul. But then they don't stand behind their decision because public opinion changed. So here's what I think. Stand behind your decision, or don't cast the girl that you know got arrested for domestic violence in the first place. And they knew it all. Here's what I think should happen. So they pulled the bachelorette. It's no longer gonna be on ABC. Which canceled it. Did you did you see the trailer?

SPEAKER_01

No.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes. The trailer actually does look good, but this is also my thing. It's fake. That's not Taylor. Like, even watching the trailer, I'm like, that's not the tailor that's on Secret Lives. Yesterday on Call Her Daddy, Alex talked to Jesse about this, and Jesse said, actually, like she is a different person when she's not in this toxic cycle with Dakota. So it's like, okay. Okay, so then she's a 31-year-old woman, a mom of three. Yeah. Stay away from Dakota. Like, really, it's not that hard. She's such a self-sabotager. She's not sure if you're not sure. She does it to herself because guess what? Spoiler alert, which actually it's not even a spoiler because they're not even airing it. She gets home from the Bachelorette, and then like two weeks later, she's back together with Dakota. Well, now they're saying she is really engaged to that Doug guy. They're not engaged anymore. They were for like. I saw something that she is, and she's still with him. But here's what I think should happen.

SPEAKER_01

I think Hulu should air it. I think that it should be behind a paywall.

SPEAKER_00

So you have to pay to watch it. And I think that ABC should take and Hulu and Disney Plus should take the money from the paywall or whatever money they make and donate it to domestic violence, women's shelters, I don't know, something. Because it's like we do want to see it as fans. I think it would be good if they got that money and donated it. Yeah. The other thing that I don't like is they're all kind of putting it back on Taylor. And I mean, yes, it was Taylor who made those decisions, but it's ABC who casted her and they knew it did be the Bachelorette.

SPEAKER_02

This is all that makes zero sense to me from the outside. Zero sense.

SPEAKER_00

Also, it was very, very convenient on Dakota Coder.

SPEAKER_02

No, that's what I was gonna say.

SPEAKER_00

Have you seen all of the they've done like these TikTok mashups of like the Tell Me Lies characters and Dakota and Taylor and how it's like these toxic cycles, and they're like, I'll send it to you. But if you're I never watched Tell Me Lies, but people are saying that he's like that one kid. Yeah, because the guy, Steven, releases a video of her that he had been holding over her head for two years. And I think that Dakota probably was holding this over her head. Oh, for sure he was.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

For sure.

SPEAKER_02

Do you think he got paid?

SPEAKER_00

Oh, yes, I do for the video. Yes, TMZ paid him a lot of money.

SPEAKER_02

So much money to release that video.

SPEAKER_00

So I saw something yesterday, and this lady used to work for TMZ, and she said they don't pay you as much as you think that they would for this kind of video.

SPEAKER_01

She said he probably got paid between five to ten thousand dollars for that video.

SPEAKER_02

Ah, no shot. That's nothing. This is my issue with this whole thing. The timing of everything is just like all too good.

SPEAKER_00

He released a maximum impact.

SPEAKER_02

But my thing is this, how did he know she was ever gonna be the bachelorette? Like, this happened on season one. You know, this kid, this look hear me out, hear me out, hear me out. This happened on season one or before Secret Lives Mormon Wives even came out. There has been four seasons now. In the first three, like, every time they've been bigger and bigger and bigger. Like, why did he not do it before then? Because I'm sure if it was five to ten thousand dollars, he probably could have made that money back then, too.

SPEAKER_00

This is what I think. I think I think he held it over her head. Maybe he was like, if you don't get back together with me, or and maybe that's why she keeps going back because he's like holding this video over her head. That can make sense, but then I think it kept getting bigger, and he was probably like, Okay, I'm gonna hold out, I'm gonna hold out, I'm gonna hold out. And then she got Bachelorette, and then I think he was like so upset that everybody was like, Yay, Taylor Frankie Paul's the Bachelorette. We're loving her, you get da da da da. So then I think he was like, you know what? She's getting her payday, I'm gonna get mine too. Yeah, he wanted maximum impact, so he waited and waited and waited and released it at the perfect time to hurt her, which I she is not an angel.

SPEAKER_01

And I think what she did to in front of her kids is disgusting.

SPEAKER_00

But he it was convenient timing, yeah. Yeah, and maybe he waited, maybe he like offered it to TMZ, and they were like, We'll give you five to ten grand, and he's like, No, it's not enough. So then he waited for them to get bigger, and then right before the bachelorette, I'm sure I guarantee he got more than 10 grand for that video.

SPEAKER_02

I think so too. Yeah, I don't know. That's just the time it's it just makes me sad for the kids.

SPEAKER_00

It's just sad for the kids, it's heartbreaking for the kids. Yeah, because these people have got to figure out their lives, yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Like, yeah, and when people hear Mormons now, unfortunately, she's at the top of the list.

SPEAKER_00

Yep.

SPEAKER_02

I hate that. I hate that anyway, not a good look.

SPEAKER_00

So now Jesse is getting a divorce from Jordan. Oh, he just sound he just sounds like the worst. She's another girl on Secret Lives and Mormon Wives.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_00

And now she he just filed for divorce and she was just on call her daddy. And she was saying that, like, because one of the seasons, season three was like all about how Jesse cheated on Jordan with this guy named Marciano, and all they did was kiss, allegedly. So she says, whatever. And I don't believe that on call her daddy. She's like, he cheated. He was hiring prostitutes with my own money because he quit his job and was just like a stay-at-home dad. Yeah. And she was like, he was hiring prostitutes, which we had never heard before. So now it's just like they're both sling in mud, and it's it's getting kind of it's getting bad. It's getting bad. It's getting bad.

SPEAKER_02

This dropping bombs left and right on the bottom.

SPEAKER_00

All you guys, this is why you don't do reality TV because it just blows up your lives. It's true.

SPEAKER_02

Yep.

SPEAKER_00

It's sad. And do you know who it affects the most are the kids?

SPEAKER_02

Oh, for sure. Messes them up.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, and like Jordan, as disgusting as I think he is, like, I literally can't stand the sight of his ugly rat face. But he has a 13-year-old daughter. So, like, she is seeing her stepmom go on call her daddy, being like, he has hires escorts. He's hiring escorts. He's allegedly doing orgies. Like, the 13-year-old daughter is seeing that, and that's heartbreaking for her.

SPEAKER_02

Imagine her going to school. She's in junior high school. Ugh, that's rough. That's rough.

SPEAKER_00

Look at the Kardashians. They've all gone through like huge public breakups, divorces. They have always kept it classy. Kim has always kept it classy. Chloe has. They have, they've always protected.

SPEAKER_02

I don't think I've ever associated the Kardashians with classy, but keep going.

SPEAKER_00

They have. They don't trash the baby daddies. They do not trash the exes because, and they've always said we will protect the kids, and we don't want our kids to see this. So we will never trash the kids' dads. It's true. And I respect that because Jesse just got on and annihilated Jordan, which he deserves, but they have kids, and the kids are the ones who get hurt in this. Yeah. And I don't like it. It's just such a dumpster fire. Like, I can't even handle it. It's like every day I am waiting for something to come out because I feel like the last two weeks, it's been absolute chaos. And actually, I just heard something so crazy. What? So, okay, this is T, and this is I have no idea how true this is. This is this is from like a friend of. And she was like, So my husband is friends with Jordan. Which red flag, red flag in itself. She said they have been friends since like middle school. She said that Jordan told her husband that Jesse and Chase have been hooking up.

SPEAKER_02

Can you enlighten me on who these people are who Okay?

SPEAKER_00

They're all part of the Mormon wives world. Chase was married to one.

SPEAKER_02

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

And they were in like the original swinger group.

SPEAKER_00

Yes.

SPEAKER_02

I remember those names. Yes. Megan told me about them.

SPEAKER_00

That could be a complete lie. Could be truth. We don't know. Anyway, on to bigger and better things. It's me. I had my horsey dream weekend. It was so fun. So let me just take you from the beginning. So I have cousins that live in Colorado.

SPEAKER_02

Alright, I'm bored. Next. Just kidding.

SPEAKER_00

You're so rude, Zach. Let me have my time to shine.

SPEAKER_02

I'm just kidding. Go.

SPEAKER_00

My cousins live in Colorado. It's like four hours away. They grew up riding horses, and that's where my love of horses came from was I would ride their horses. We had so much fun. Um at one point I lived in Colorado for I want to say at least two months because I went, me and my cousin went together to EFY, which is like a Mormon thing. I don't even know how to explain EFY. Loved it. We had so much fun. Um anyway, so I went back to Colorado with her from EFY. And then I stayed so long I started going to school with her. Like I remember going to school and the teachers like giving me worksheets and like I didn't really even have to do them. Anyway. I didn't have to do it because like technically I like wasn't even like like enrolled there. We had so much fun. So it was like we were reliving like all of your childhood. Yeah, because when I would go there, they would take me along with them to like their jackpot weekends, which for those of you who don't know, a jackpot is when if everybody signs up for a barrel race, they put in like$50. Whoever wins the 1D, 2D, 3D, 4D, they get the money from the jackpot. So 1D, you get the biggest payout, 2D, you get a little smaller, and then so on and so forth. So I remember going that to that with them, whatever. So this weekend, she sent me like a flyer and she was like, There's a barrel race, drive down to Grand Junction. So I drove down to Grand Junction by myself. I've never like done a road trip completely solo before. I made it to Grand Junction. We get there, she has two horses, one's her horse, and then she's fostering a horse. Were there any cute cowboys? There were the cutest little kid cowboys. There were no like adult men cowboys. We don't care about that.

SPEAKER_02

We don't care about that.

SPEAKER_00

But they they were the cutest little boys in like their jeans and their button-up and their sheet hat and their tiny little bodies.

SPEAKER_02

We don't care.

SPEAKER_00

It was just like I was just sitting there and I was like, answer the real question. I said there were no adult cowboys there.

SPEAKER_02

Okay, okay, then that's all we need to know. I don't need to know about the random 10-year-olds.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. No, they were like five, and they were so freaking cute. I get to my jackpot and I'm like so excited. I'm like, okay, like me and Louie, that's my that's the horse that I rode, my cousin's horse. And like we got this. He's been retired for 10 years. He's like 28. Okay. Most horses live between like 25 and 30. So, like, he's really getting up there. I'm like, we got this. He was so excited. He was like getting really hot and excited, and he's like, I want to go run this barrel pattern. So we get in, you sign up for an exhibition, you have to pay like five dollars. It adds to the jackpot. Um, and an exhibition is just like a practice for the jackpot. We did the jackpot or we did the exhibition, it was good. I just like kind of took it slow because he was getting really excited, and he hasn't done it in 10 years.

SPEAKER_02

Like, defined good. Like, I only saw the video of the real one. How did that compare? Like, how was your exhibition a lot better than that one?

SPEAKER_00

My exhibition. Technically was better than my actual jackpot because we didn't break the pattern. And I'll explain that when I get to the jackpot part. But anyway, I just like I took the exhibition slow because he was getting excited. We did the exhibition, then it's my turn for the jackpot. And I'm like, okay, we got this, Louie. Like, we got it. So then we go and he like shoots off. And it like scared me because he had never shot off with me before. And I was like, whoa. So then I like kind of pulled back because I was like, whoa. And then he ducked the first barrel, which means he missed it. And so that's when I say, like, when we broke pattern, he didn't, he wasn't following the pattern, so he broke it. So technically we got a no time. But if we did get a time, it was 29 seconds. And my goal was to be under 30. So I hit my goal. For context, the girl who won, her name's Rachel, she just won rookie of the year for like the NFR. So she was at this barrel race and she ran a 17 second. So it's like you have me who's running a 29 second, and then you have the rookie of the year running a 17 second. And then you also have straight up five-year-olds running their horse, like these massive horses, and they're running 20-second barrels.

SPEAKER_02

That is really cool.

SPEAKER_00

Um, I don't care, but I care, so whatever.

SPEAKER_02

No, no, I I was genuinely I was impressed that you did this. I was very impressed that you did this. Are you gonna do it again?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. Because there are jackpots like locally in Utah that I can go to.

SPEAKER_02

I hope it's not a mean question, but have you ever stuck with something this long? Like that you've loved and kept with it.

SPEAKER_00

No, no, no. So like other than volleyball, no.

SPEAKER_02

Good job. That's good, that's awesome.

SPEAKER_00

So did you sign up for the Draper Rodeo? No, not yet. Because one, I need my own horse. I have a lot of work to do.

SPEAKER_02

When is it? July?

SPEAKER_00

July 8th, I think.

SPEAKER_02

Okay, got some work to do. Got some work to do. Alright. Moving on from the horses. Oh, my week. House hunting. We went to Dallas.

SPEAKER_00

How was that?

SPEAKER_02

You know, I hate house hunting. I hate going into people's houses when they're like when it's still occupied. Luckily, some of the houses were um weren't occupied, so that was good. But we saw, I think in two days, we saw 14 or 15 houses.

SPEAKER_01

So we were crazy.

SPEAKER_02

We were going around a lot.

SPEAKER_01

It was tell them tell them the big news.

SPEAKER_02

We did find one, so it was worth it. We got one. It's uh it's a little older, a little needs a little work, but uh, I think it'll be a good one.

SPEAKER_00

Designer Emily at your services.

SPEAKER_02

Exactly.

SPEAKER_00

Designer Emily is loving life right now. She just got a new project.

SPEAKER_02

We're excited though. It'll be good, it'll be a good spot for for the fam. Yeah, crazy, crazy times. It's nice to know where we're gonna be for a couple at least like five plus years. So we haven't felt that.

SPEAKER_00

And Dallas is just so much easier to get to. Oh, I can't wait. Direct flight, two-hour flight. Yeah, it's gonna be and provo, you can just fly right out of provo. It's so easy. Yeah, yeah. Done and done. Can see my boise more.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, we'll be able to come back a lot more.

SPEAKER_00

Let's just take a little deep dive. You they lived in DC. You never went to DC, you never went to Rhode Island, which I never went to Rhode Island either, so I'll give you a pass. You never went to Virginia.

SPEAKER_02

Wait, go back, go back. You wish you went to Rhode Island, not to see us, to be able to go see.

SPEAKER_00

Exactly. Exactly. You're right.

SPEAKER_02

Are you actually gonna see us in Dallas?

SPEAKER_00

Yes, but you never went in Virginia. Why? Well, here's the problem. I've got four of my own children. Rachel went. She took Ford. Yeah. He's not in the street. Well, she came twice. He doesn't have activities.

SPEAKER_01

Isla went for dance. Yeah. I know. Okay, I'm a bad sister. Fine. Sue me. Does that mean I'm on the bottom this week?

SPEAKER_00

Oh, yeah. Sister rankings. Oh, wow.

SPEAKER_02

I forgot about sister rankings. Should we do those real quick?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, let's do it.

SPEAKER_02

I mean, I really haven't talked to you all too much.

SPEAKER_01

Well, I just think oh.

SPEAKER_02

What?

SPEAKER_01

We've talked about paradise and survival.

SPEAKER_02

Okay. Also, Paradise is the best show.

SPEAKER_01

You guys.

SPEAKER_02

I hate to admit that you were right on that one. So Emily's the one that told me about Paradise.

SPEAKER_01

Oh.

SPEAKER_02

So freaking good. You gotta watch it.

SPEAKER_01

It's a show on Hulu. It is.

SPEAKER_00

Well, I know you don't like shows. You're weird. It is so freaking good. Whatever. I just restarted Scandal and it's so good. Scandal's incredible. Scandal's incredible, but Paradise is good.

SPEAKER_02

Um but paradise is unreal.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, it is. Like the you guys, okay. Like I would get would I would rate season one like a seven, eight. Season two has been a ten. Can you explain like give me like a little gist of the point? You can't. We can't because it ruins it. Like it gives everything away.

SPEAKER_02

Basically it's just the world's coming to an end, basically.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, is this the one about the Denver airport?

SPEAKER_02

What the hell? What?

SPEAKER_00

No. They like go like underneath the Denver Airport. Well no, we're not gonna say anything.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, you gotta watch it. Okay.

SPEAKER_00

I won't, but okay. Why? Why won't you watch shows? It actually bugs me. I don't know.

SPEAKER_02

We'll watch 52 episodes of Love Island, but we won't watch the show.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, because I like reality TV. I like like background TV. Like what's that one? What's that one show with the eggs that we try I tried to get into? The egg. They like cut the egg and something with the egg. Severance. Severance. I could severance. Paradise moves much quicker than severance. Severance is a very slow burn. Paradise moves a lot quicker. It's so quite a good thing. I think you would like this one. Is it over or is it a complete series?

SPEAKER_02

There's another season.

SPEAKER_00

One more season. And then Paradise will have one more season after this.

SPEAKER_02

I think you'd like Paradise because it has a little bit of uh what do you like? The CIA, like the scandal. There's a guy that at least was in the Secret Service. Like you would like that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. Kind of.

SPEAKER_02

Well, when we say kind of, it's because it's not hot and steamy, like Emily likes.

SPEAKER_00

There is one really hot and steamy scene. No, I just want like an epic love story. Like I love an epic romance. That's what I want. Oh, there's actually no, there's actually a few romances now that I'm thinking about it.

SPEAKER_01

It's good.

unknown

It's good.

SPEAKER_01

Everybody go watch it. I give it an A plus. But that's basically why I think I should be on top of Sister Rankings because we've been talking about that.

SPEAKER_00

We're watching Survivor together right now. Oh my gosh. Yeah. I was at your house yesterday, and all of a sudden I hear little Lindy Lou's voice, and she goes, Can we go watch Survivor now? Yeah. Every night, London and I love that. Watch Survivor. She falls asleep with me, and that's when she elbowed me and die.

SPEAKER_02

That's funny.

SPEAKER_00

Uh-oh.

unknown

Uh-oh.

SPEAKER_02

All right. My sister rankings. I'll do it quick. Unfortunately, and she's probably pissed at me. Rachel's back to third. She hasn't done anything to bug me or anything like that. It's just because I haven't talked to her. It's back to Emily being second.

SPEAKER_00

I don't think that that should be the case because what have you talked to Amy about?

SPEAKER_02

I talked to Amy probably every day still. Talk to her about the podcast. She talked about the houses, talked about the boys.

SPEAKER_00

I talked about the houses for a long time with you and Megan yesterday. Me, Megan, and Jack.

SPEAKER_02

That's true. Wait, actually, I take that back. I take that back. Maybe I have to switch these up.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, please do. Please do. Wow.

SPEAKER_01

Let's get back to our rightful places.

SPEAKER_02

Emily, the designer is actually stepping up a lot right now. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Am I charging? Am I charging you? Absolutely not. Am I giving you all my deepest discounts wholesale costs that I'm getting? Yes.

SPEAKER_02

I mean, I hope you're not charging us, but uh maybe we can do a tie. A tie for this.

SPEAKER_01

I'll accept that. Okay. I don't, but what?

SPEAKER_02

Because Amy has been very helpful. Amy does a lot.

SPEAKER_00

How about the fact that I like basically? Why does it have to be based off of helpfulness? How about it's just who you talk to the most, and that's me.

SPEAKER_02

No, because I was talking about she was being helpful with the house and the design, but then you also were helping with the Lei house and get everything taken care of. Like we had left a couple things, and you were doing that.

SPEAKER_00

You and Megan left a lot of behind.

SPEAKER_02

Where okay, we got most of it to the garage.

SPEAKER_00

You guys, really quick, look how far I've come in one week. That's it is true. That's one week ago. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. It like you look good when you're like, I look so bad. I'm like, you really don't look that bad.

SPEAKER_02

Do you want to hear something? This is not trying to be mean, but like I've had multiple people talk to me and be like, why would anyone ever do that to their face?

SPEAKER_01

Who? Who talked to you? Who?

SPEAKER_02

I've had classmates, family members, no, I've had classmates bring it up to me.

SPEAKER_01

And say what?

SPEAKER_02

Like, why would you ever do that to your face? Like, what did she do? Why? She's so pretty before. Like, why would she do that?

SPEAKER_00

I don't know. I'm stupid. When you had your bloody tears, that was scary.

SPEAKER_02

I still can't believe you posted that.

SPEAKER_00

I can't either.

SPEAKER_02

Crazy.

SPEAKER_00

This girl has no shame.

SPEAKER_02

That's for sure.

SPEAKER_00

No. Alright, we're good.

SPEAKER_02

We're good. Moving on.

SPEAKER_00

You're gonna make Zach pass out. He's such a baby. You're such a baby.

SPEAKER_02

I'm sure baby. Shut up.

SPEAKER_00

You are. You are. Okay, continue.

SPEAKER_02

Because I don't like the bloody stuff.

SPEAKER_00

What happens if Megan gets this in 15 years?

SPEAKER_02

Um, yeah.

SPEAKER_00

And what happens when you're gonna have to clean out her drain that's attached to her head? He can't. He physically can't. He would literally pass out.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, I don't I could not. Whatever you just said about taking some drinks.

SPEAKER_01

I would have to come and like nurse her back to health.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, that's not gonna happen.

SPEAKER_00

See, that kind of stuff doesn't bother Taylor. He was the most incredible nurse ever. It's true.

SPEAKER_02

Okay, I'm very helpful with like the C-section stuff. I was very helpful.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, it's just that you wouldn't be able to like clean out the drain coming out of her head.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, that's that that's just the sound of that is crazy.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. You wouldn't like that.

SPEAKER_02

No, no, no, no. No. Okay. I want to try a new little segment for you all.

SPEAKER_00

Ooh, fun.

SPEAKER_02

It might be boring. It might be good. We'll see. But hopefully it'll spark some funny conversations. So we're gonna do a thing called most likely to the in-law edition. Okay. So I'm gonna read most likely to do something, and you just say who in the family would be the most likely to do this.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

So let's do like a first one. Who would be most likely to give advice that nobody asked for?

SPEAKER_01

Shannon Shannon.

SPEAKER_00

No, can I can I cite an example an example?

SPEAKER_02

Please.

SPEAKER_00

So as I said, I was getting ready and I was finishing the Call Her Daddy episode with Jesse Draper, and Shannon comes walking into her bathroom to get ready to go hang out with her friends, whatever she does. And all of a sudden she starts talking about how, like, just like saying all this stuff about how these people are crazy and they shouldn't be doing this. And I'm like, shh, I'm trying to listen to this girl talk. And she's like, well, no, and just like, and I'm like, hey, shh.

SPEAKER_02

Who is most likely to be on their phone the entire family dinner?

SPEAKER_00

Rachel.

unknown

Emily.

SPEAKER_02

I was gonna say Emily.

SPEAKER_00

Really? Either Emily or Rachel. If Emily is in the middle of a show that she's I would never watch a show at family dinner. No, you eat really fast, and then you go sit on the couch, and then you go sit on your phone, and we're like all still around the table.

SPEAKER_02

I would say most people aren't on their phones during family dinner. Not during dinner. I will say that. Not during dinner. When we're all sitting at the table, no one's really eating. I would just say though, right after, if you're in the middle of a season you like Emily, you are locked in.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

It's true.

SPEAKER_00

That's true.

SPEAKER_02

Most likely to bring up something from 10 years ago, like it just happened.

SPEAKER_00

Rachel. Both of you, actually. 1000%.

SPEAKER_02

Example.

SPEAKER_00

All of her stuff with you hated my black hair and all my friends in high school when she says that to mom. And you yelled at me when I put the blonde strip in the her skunk hair. The skunk hair was a little bit. She still brings that up that Shannon hated her skunk hair. Yeah, you bring up old stuff too. Like what? Name them. I don't know. Name them. I can't name them right now, but if you give me enough time, I could think of something.

SPEAKER_02

Alright. Most likely to say, I'm not trying to start anything and then immediately start something.

SPEAKER_00

Nobody would ever say I'm not trying to start anything. They would just like get into it. They would just start it. If they felt like starting something, they would just be like, bam.

SPEAKER_02

Who's the mo who starts things the most?

SPEAKER_00

It depends on the day. It could be me, it could be Emily, could be Rachel, it could be Shannon. Shannon.

SPEAKER_02

Does Megan ever start stuff?

SPEAKER_01

No. I don't think so. No.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, I don't think so.

SPEAKER_01

She's pretty unproblematic.

SPEAKER_02

I feel like she only time she gets caught in the middle is when maybe she tells one of you something that she wasn't supposed to tell.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00

We all do that though. Everyone's like, don't tell anyone, and then we all go and tell. We I mean we do tell each other everything, but we don't tell other people. Everything at all. Yeah, no, it's just like the sisters and Shannon and Michael.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Taylor and Drew and Zach. Just the family. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Most likely to tell your kids something that you didn't want them to know.

SPEAKER_01

Family.

SPEAKER_02

That's for sure.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. That's that's for sure. I just like talk freely all the time in front of them, and I shouldn't.

SPEAKER_02

That's true. Yeah. You do just kind of let it all out there.

SPEAKER_01

I let it fly.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Does Taylor ever get mad about that?

SPEAKER_01

Yes.

SPEAKER_02

Really?

SPEAKER_01

Sometimes. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Taylor, I've never seen Taylor mad in my life.

SPEAKER_00

He doesn't get mad. He's just like, really? Yeah, he doesn't get mad. He doesn't ever get mad at me. Yeah. His mad, his version of mad is like, seriously. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Or he'll be like, can we not talk about this right now? And Emily's like, why? Yeah, why? I want to talk about it. But like honestly, like, in my heart of hearts, I feel like he thinks I can do no wrong.

SPEAKER_01

Well, obviously.

SPEAKER_02

There you go.

SPEAKER_01

You know?

SPEAKER_02

That's great. That's great. Most likely show up unannounced at their kids' house once they're married. So like when Canon gets old or Capri gets old, yeah.

SPEAKER_00

I show up to their houses all the time unannounced.

SPEAKER_02

What if? I have a hypothetical for you. What if Canon or Capri marries someone that doesn't like you coming over all the time?

SPEAKER_01

Well, then that's gonna be a big problem.

SPEAKER_00

Uh-oh. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Well, what are you gonna do?

SPEAKER_00

I don't know. Tell them to shove it and get over it. I'm gonna have to like really make that girl like me. Like, I'm gonna have to take her shopping. Because it's it's probably usually not gonna be the husband that wouldn't like me. What if the husband's like, your mom is overbearing and annoying?

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Like she needs we need to set boundaries. I'm more worried about the wives. Because I'm gonna have to make them be my best friend.

SPEAKER_02

Last one, most likely to be right about something. So, like you, you know that person was right, but I wouldn't you would never admit it to their face. Like someone that won't admit that they were wrong, basically.

SPEAKER_00

Emily or Rachel. Yeah. You think who I uh probably Rachel more Emily and Rachel do not like to be wrong, they know best. Yeah. We don't love apologizing either. No, oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_02

I don't think I've ever heard you apologize.

SPEAKER_00

It's not our favorite. I can apologize. I actually texted Drew the other day and apologized.

SPEAKER_02

For what?

SPEAKER_00

So he went to the house to like fix something, and he was like, there were like a bunch of it was like a bunch of your stuff that like you didn't want to bring to Dallas, and Jessica was coming to get it. And he was like, What is all this stuff? And I was like, Oh, that's the stuff that Jessica said she wanted and she's gonna come get it. And then he was like, Okay, well, like my friend is here, so he's gonna take some stuff. And it I was like, no, like I I already told Jessica that she could have it. She won came and looked at it, and that's what she wanted. And he was like, Well, he already took it. So then I was like, Oh my gosh, you're so annoying. And he was like, Well, I've been here helping you with your house so you could be grateful. And I was like, Ew, you're a douche. And then like a couple hours later, I said, sorry, I was being a thanks for all your help. I appreciate it. And he said, All good, it's a stressful time. So really, really stressful time for you, Amy. Well, no, but moving is always stressful. Yeah, it is moving sucks. Don't be a freaking to me. You know what? You've been you've been really rude to me this episode, and I don't like it. I have not. Yes, what did I do? What did I do? I anytime I talk, you say you're bored, you don't care about anything. Like it's rude. No, it's not about if it's not about you, Emily, you don't care, you're not interested. Okay, sorry. I just like my eyes hurt. I have a headache, I look weird. Like, I don't want to be here right now because I just don't feel my eyes. Bye. It's not about you, it's it's me. It as it always is. No, I just like I don't feel I just feel like uh and my eyes hurt.

SPEAKER_02

Okay, moving on. Judge and jury, we'll finish it up. For my birthday, my mother-in-law gave me a gift card to a store I have never shopped at, have never mentioned, and have no interest in. I said, thank you. She then said, I wasn't sure what to get you because I feel like I don't really know you. We've been married for six years. Six years. She then asked if I wanted to do something sometime to fix that. I said, sure. She's not followed up. My birthday was in October. Should I follow up? Should I let it die? I am genuinely asking.

SPEAKER_00

I mean, if she wants to get like if she wants to go hang out with her mother-in-law, then yeah, follow up. If you don't care, then don't follow up. Yeah, also, like, she tried, she tried to get her something with the like the gift card. I don't.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Don't be rude about it. I mean, yeah, she could have been like, I didn't know what to get you, so I didn't get you anything. Like, she went out of her way to get the gift card. She was thinking about you. It was a thoughtful gift. It's the thought, yeah. It's the thought that matters. I agree.

SPEAKER_02

As always, I'm gonna come from the other side.

unknown

Right.

SPEAKER_02

This is what I do. Oh my basically, the mother-in-law is saying she doesn't care either, though, because sh she didn't even ask the husband what does I mean, that's what my mom does. My mom doesn't really know the brands and stuff that Megan likes, but my mom will text me and be like, Well, what can I get Megan for a birthday? I want to make sure she gets something that she likes. So she doesn't do that, she doesn't do something, just a simple text to ask people. And then she says, Yeah, let's get to know each other a little bit more, and then never follows up and never says anything. So in my shoes, I'd be like, All right, so my mother-in-law doesn't care about me at all. So I'm just gonna let this die and just be happy with my husband, whatever.

SPEAKER_00

Maybe the mother-in-law is like, I don't know if she wants to hang out with me. So, like, I'm like I said, let's get together. Like now, maybe the mother-in-law is like the ball's in her court. I can see that.

SPEAKER_02

I actually struggle with this sometimes too, just like in general life, when it's like, you know, you meet people and they're they say, Oh, let's go do something sometime, or and like you don't know if they're just saying it to say it. Yeah, yeah. Or for example, I don't know, this happens with I don't know, maybe I think too much about this. Like people that are older than you, or like, you know what I mean? And they're like, should they be taking the lead in the relationship because they're older, or should I like take the initiative to go say, like, let's go do something, or like you know what I mean? Because sometimes I bet she's wondering, well, she's the older person, she's the mother-in-law. Like, if she wants to do something, I'm gonna let her do it because she's I don't think so.

SPEAKER_01

I don't think so.

SPEAKER_00

I think they both need to put in an effort.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, that's my judge and jury.

SPEAKER_00

I think if this girl is like, I do like want to get together with her, but like she hasn't followed up, then you follow up. Yeah, it's a two-way street. Maybe she feels like I gave her the gift card for her birthday. I said, let's get together, and then she never like said anything, or like maybe the mother in law feels like she's not like interested. And so she's like, Okay, well, I said that and she didn't seem interested, so I'm not gonna like pester her. The mother in law probably doesn't want to be a pest.

SPEAKER_01

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. And the fact that this has been months now since this happened, I mean, if she's bothered by this that much, she should just send a text and say, hey, wanted to see if we still wanted to do something. Just make the effort. Um, doesn't mean they're gonna be best friends, but yeah.

SPEAKER_00

It's really not that deep. Either keep going as it's going or get to know the lady if it really bothers you that much and freaking go to lunch with her. How hard is that?

SPEAKER_02

You know what really chaps my ass. No, it's kidding.

SPEAKER_00

What chaps your ass?

SPEAKER_02

Just kidding. I'm just gonna say that should be your trademarks. Not it's not that deep is decent.

SPEAKER_00

It's not that deep, and that chaps my ass. I just think that's so funny. I thought that was like a well-known saying. The amount of people that wrote me and they were like, I'm laughing so hard, I've never heard this before. I'm like, how have I never heard that chaps my ass?

SPEAKER_02

I feel like that's definitely maybe uh, I don't know, Utah saying, maybe like a more country.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, maybe it's like a more like it's your horse girl coming out in you.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, western, probably more western.

SPEAKER_00

I even said that before I like fell back in love with horses. Like I remember saying that in high school.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, I feel like just more Western thing. Anyway, so what's our final verdict for this person?

SPEAKER_00

Either just like keep the course and don't change, or take your mother-in-law out to lunch. Yeah. Okay. How hard is that?

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, I think who's guilty though? Who who's at fault here?

SPEAKER_00

None of them are at fault.

SPEAKER_02

Fine. I'm gonna say the mother-in-law's at fault.

SPEAKER_00

It's a hung jury. How is the mother? That's not the mother-in-law's not at fault. She tried to give her a nice gift that maybe she thought was nice. That she's mother-law.

SPEAKER_02

Okay, come on.

SPEAKER_00

You're annoying. No, you're annoying.

SPEAKER_02

Mother-in-law is at fault.

SPEAKER_00

It's a hung jury, which means everyone's innocent. Bye. Yeah, bye, okay, go. Next. You're dead wrong.

SPEAKER_02

No, I'm not. I'm not.

SPEAKER_00

Dead wrong.

SPEAKER_02

Send her a text though. Okay, that's it. Okay, go. Next one. I want to say that I've spent 11 years being kind and flexible and accommodating to my in-laws. I've driven four hours for last-minute family dinners. I've rearranged vacations. I have smiled through comments about my cooking, my parenting, and my career. Two weeks ago, my father-in-law thanked my husband at a family dinner for raising such a good family. My husband was at the table. I was at the table. I cooked that dinner. I just thought you should know. So this one's this one's more venting to us.

SPEAKER_00

That's actually rude. I don't like that. That is rude. I just want to know, did your husband say, like, well, yeah, we did such a good job, or like it wasn't just me, it was all her. I gotta know.

SPEAKER_02

No comments about that. Yeah, no comments about that.

SPEAKER_00

I think I hope the husband came to her defense. And if the husband didn't come to the defense, the husband is at fault too.

SPEAKER_02

But I don't know why the father-in-law would say, like, specifically to the son. Like that's kind of odd. I would not say too too much offense to it.

SPEAKER_00

Don't take it.

SPEAKER_02

No, no, I'm not I'm not gonna take their side. I'm just saying, I wouldn't take too much offense to it.

SPEAKER_00

I do think that's rude. It is rude. And a little male chauvinist. Oh no, wait, what's I guess that yeah. Yeah, no, it is male chauvinist because Yeah, it's male chauvinist. He's like saying, like, no, but if it was male chauvinist, wouldn't he expect the woman to take care of the kids and cook all the meals?

SPEAKER_02

He's taking all the but then the men are taking all the credit.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, okay, yeah. So no, I don't like that. Yeah, no. And honestly, this woman must be a saint because to put up with like those kind of like snarky comments for 11 years, this woman must be like very patient because I would have snapped like day two.

SPEAKER_02

But it does sound like they don't live close to each other because they were driving about four hours for family dinners and stuff. So I hope for her sake, she's not having to hear this constantly. I think she just needed to vent about it personally. I think she just wanted to say it to somebody. So, what's your verdict for this lady?

SPEAKER_00

Any last words for this lady who No, tell your husband to freaking stand up for you. It's not that hard. Yeah, your father-in-law is uh sounds like a male chauvinist. And if your fa if your husband doesn't stand up for you, then either stand up for yourself or or tell him. Or tell him. Say, do you not see how that comment is rude and disrespectful? Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. Okay. I agree.

SPEAKER_00

So the father-in-law is guilty. Goodbye. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, father-in-law is guilty.

SPEAKER_00

And if the husband doesn't see a problem with the father-in-law's comments, husband is guilty. And that is this week's episode for legally friends. You can find us anywhere. You listen to podcasts, Spotify, Apple Music, YouTube. Um, follow us on Instagram, Emily I Jackson, Amy Scala. Zach doesn't have Instagram, but Meg L. Hunsaker, Meg L. Scala, can't be like one. Next week we have a very special guest, and I'm very excited because she's a longtime friend. We will see you next week.

SPEAKER_01

Bye.

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