Wesley’s Pop Culture Club
Wesley’s Pop Culture Club is an art appreciation podcast! We like to discuss new movies, television, music, comics, and more! Stay tuned for some laughs and good hangs with your pals, Lucas and Jonah! New Issues every Friday!
Art by Maddy Asma
Wesley’s Pop Culture Club
Issue #13 -- There's A Lotta Ants, There's A Lotta Us
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On this very special no-format Issue, Jonah and Lucas check in on Jonah's longboarding journey and listen to fan mail before diving in on some thought-provoking topics such as what happens after you die, putting forks in the microwave, and allergies! Thanks for listening!
Art by Maddy Asma
LINKS!!!
Hello everybody, and welcome to issue number thirteen of Yours, Ours, and Everybody's Wesley's Pop Culture Club. Wow, you're staring at me with just fierce precision. I didn't know where I was going with that.
SPEAKER_02I'm here, man.
SPEAKER_03We uh thank you. We are here together, and we are a pop culture discussion podcast. Um this is our thank you. This is our lucky number 13th episode. Wow. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Baker's dozen as well. Baker's does. Bakers does.
SPEAKER_03You throw a little extra one in there because they love you. Oh thanks. So kind. Thank you. Um we are uh kind of uh throwing away the pop culture thing for this episode. I'm sure something will come up, probably. Yeah, usually discussions between us, yeah.
SPEAKER_02In our very intellectual discussions.
SPEAKER_03Yes. Yes. Uh which this will no doubt be one of those. Yes.
SPEAKER_02So strap on your bootstraps.
SPEAKER_03Strap on those bootstraps. Right. Pull them tight. Um we're kind of doing a no format thing here for this one. We have an extra Friday that we couldn't decide what to do with. And we're gonna test this out. Okay, see how it goes. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02I like that idea.
SPEAKER_03And then, regardless of how it goes, we'll probably continue to do this on the extra Fridays.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, we won't listen to the feedback.
SPEAKER_03No. We're just gonna plow ahead. I'm sure there'll be a lot, but um I'm not gonna listen to any of it. Yeah, good. Stay true.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_03Um I I have a little question for you. Okay. That I wanted to um people people on the internet who listen to this show, sure. They're obsessed and they're dying to know. Oh how is the longboarding going? Really? They want to know.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_03I do too, but I didn't realize it was gonna be such a big deal.
SPEAKER_04Wow.
SPEAKER_02Um, I don't look at our like comments or anything, so maybe I like like could do that.
SPEAKER_03No, it's better for your mental health if you don't know.
SPEAKER_04A lot of them are like, you guys saw that, right, yeah.
SPEAKER_03Probably like 90% of that.
SPEAKER_02Uh it's it's actually going well right now. Thank you for you guys for asking. Um, I had a I had a fall that happened like like two weeks ago where I uh I went down a hill. I kind of bit off more than I could chew.
SPEAKER_03This was the did we we talked about this? I think that we did. And you landed kind of on your side. Yes. Yes. Oh, okay. I forgot that we that we talked about this. Oh, yeah. This is why people want to know how it's going. They're worried about you. Okay, so they want you to stop.
SPEAKER_02You need to quit that. Okay, so let's so I'm doing better now.
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_02Um, yeah, so I can I can skate now, and I have learned to go on longer, flatter surfaces. Okay, I don't really go into any I don't go into any hills right now. Uh, but truthfully, I mean I didn't go this last week. I think it's been like I don't really go that much, you know. Um I try to go like on the weekends.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02But yeah, it's been fun. I want to do it, continue to do it more, and I want to get better at at like turv turning, which is called like carving.
SPEAKER_03Wow.
SPEAKER_02It's very cool.
SPEAKER_03It's like you kind of just like why not just call it turning?
SPEAKER_02Because carving is way cooler. Sounds a lot cooler. But you also you feel like you're carving up the road. You know what I mean? Like you're like, and that's why it's called carving.
SPEAKER_03Do you ever notice that you are?
SPEAKER_02No, I've never had. You see little divots? No, I've never I've never done that.
SPEAKER_03Oh, okay. Yeah. Alright. Uh yeah. So it's kind of a misnomer then. Yeah, yeah, it is.
SPEAKER_02Unfortunately, it is. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03You got me. I think we've established you lie on this podcast.
SPEAKER_02Well, I've said that. I love to lie a lot. But uh no, it's going good. And yeah, I want to keep doing it. I would like to I actually was looking up uh this weekend. Can like can I just do it in like public roads? Like, can I go into like the city and just do it on the roads? And in our state, there's a law that says you're not many of them. I know, right? There's there's so many laws. Yeah, it's we only need like four, I think. Probably like something like that. I you know, but yeah, so it says that you can you can't, you know, it says that you can't do it on the roads and send the pup on public roads. Okay, and then it was unclear about sidewalks, but honestly, I'm not gonna do it on sidewalks because they're all like choppy, like divots, you know, and it's like people are walking there. So, um, so yeah, so now I'm just like doing it in parks. I go to a park. Nice. But I also was thinking of doing it on a bike path. Because that's something that you could do. Like paved, yeah. Yeah. So it's go yeah, it's going well, and I want to continue doing it and carving.
SPEAKER_03Cool, man. Keep that carving up. Thanks, dude. I am uh we'll be checking back in in the future. Yeah, no, I I appreciate it. People uh will only be sated for so long.
SPEAKER_02I yeah, I I uh I want people to be sated. Yeah. So that's part of the reason why I like to come on the show with you to ensure that at least one person is sated in my longboard and quest, but also like just other avenues, you know. How do you feel like it's going so far? It's going pretty good.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I'm actually pretty satisfied. Okay. I'm pretty satisfied. You're doing well. Yeah. Yeah. I feel full and happy.
SPEAKER_02Good, dude. Okay. That's good.
SPEAKER_03Um, how about this? Yeah. We got a couple of audio fan mail messages from devoted fans uh followers of the pod through our podcast um directory uh software or what it is.
SPEAKER_02Was it like a Rolodex? Yeah. It's like a Rolodex, I saw it in the back room, I think.
SPEAKER_03And somehow it plays audio, and people can send can send like voicemails to it. Okay.
SPEAKER_02Wow, that's I didn't know it had that capacity. Yeah. Yeah, that's pretty simple.
SPEAKER_03So it's really cool. Wow. Wow. So so I thought we could listen to them. Yeah, that'd be awesome. We have two. We have two. Okay. Okay. Should we dive in on the first one?
SPEAKER_02Yes, yes.
SPEAKER_03Now this is from somebody.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_03The subject of this message says it's always been Jack.
SPEAKER_02So that's so okay.
SPEAKER_03That's that's some good fan mail there. So that's one of them. Okay. Um thank you to whoever that was. We really appreciate that. We really appreciate that.
SPEAKER_02That was very heartfelt and emotional.
SPEAKER_03Amazing.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, like I teared up. That could be you mentioned in our last week's issue that we had some possible theme song contenders. Right. That one's at the top of the list right now.
SPEAKER_03Well, it's interesting you say that. Okay. Because our next uh fan mail uh comes to us from someone else. Somebody else. I don't know. The subject of this one says Zoot Suit. Let's take a listen.
SPEAKER_01Um, I wrote a little song that I maybe thought could be your theme song. So I was just wondering if maybe you guys could put it as like an album of the month or something. Maybe you could listen to it. It's just I got a little snippet. I'm gonna send the rest of the EPs your way. Uh, but this is how it goes.
SPEAKER_00Zubba zit zabudo di zab. Zibba do zab zib zab zip Oh that's a masterpiece.
SPEAKER_02I think that's our theme song. I think it is too. That's totally I'm on board for that.
SPEAKER_03Thank you to whomever sent that one our way. Um that was that was really eclectic. You don't hear something like that often.
SPEAKER_02No, I do, but yeah, I bet you do.
SPEAKER_03Um I loved the throat, the clearing of the throat before the singing began. Classy. It was classy. Very classy.
SPEAKER_02I I hope if I ever meet this person who did this, that I, you know, I can hopefully I can meet them someday and just say, what a masterpiece.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02You know, they don't people are saying they don't make them like they used to. Uh that's false. Clearly. We got the evidence right here. Very nice, right? This is awesome. So this is this this is a great track.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Thank you. Thank you so much. I uh I am a little bit bummed that we just recorded our albums of the month.
SPEAKER_02Because I do feel like that one would have really that would have fit well, but really well.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02But you know what?
SPEAKER_03We got time. We got time. It just came out. That was sent to us only three days ago. So does it give a username at all? Or it gives an email, but that feels private.
SPEAKER_02Oh, yeah. Is it an Amazon email? Do we know? Or that feels damn it.
SPEAKER_03True like too much information to divulge.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um that was the stuff that I had that was planned. We're 11 minutes in. Feels like we should we should probably keep going. We could keep going. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02So okay, yeah. Okay. What else what else do you been like thinking about lately?
SPEAKER_03Man, lately. I've been taking walks at night and looking up at the sky. And I've been wondering, and I'm gonna pose this question to you in all seriousness. Yeah. What do you think happens when we die?
SPEAKER_02Oh god. I you know what? Funny you asked this because I like to take walks too.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Uh at night. At night? Yeah, at night. And um sometimes I'll look up at the stars too. When you can see them. From all that pollution, right?
unknownGod damn it.
SPEAKER_02Am I serious or am I not serious? Are you? I you gotta be joking me.
SPEAKER_03Okay. Are you joking? Am I joking you? Are you serious?
SPEAKER_02Yes. I'm serious right now. Alright. Okay, so what happens when you die? I that's a great question. That's a great question. One of the classics, I think. Age old. I think that I, you know, some part of me thinks that, you know, there's a lot of ants running around. Okay, I like where this is going. And I'm just like, there's a lot of ants. There's a lot of us. Right, right. In the Midwest. Let's focus on the Midwest right now. Okay. Last week we talked about that. We're both from the Midwest. Um I'm thinking that we probably turn into ants. And here's the thing, okay? What does someone do when they see an ant? They step on them. You know what? That I I think that that's just that's messed up because that's a person. And I've just been thinking about that a little bit lately. I mean, there's so many of them, right? There are. It could also be like any bug. There's so many bugs. But let's keep the focus on ants right now, okay? So that's why I don't kill ants, I just flick them. You know, I say get off. I'm sure they're fine after that. Yeah, oh yeah. Like I'll flick them really, really hard. Right. Just because they're gross. Yeah. But just get them off of my hands.
SPEAKER_03And they kind of land on their back and they don't move.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah. But they're fine. I don't step on them though. No, no. I'm not gonna do that. Yeah, I'm not gonna do that to them.
SPEAKER_03No, no, no. I hear you.
SPEAKER_02What do you what are your thoughts on on this?
SPEAKER_03Well, on ants? Any of that. Okay. Well, I'll say I'm looking I'm looking this up. According to an article from NPR, published in September of 2022. Okay. The number of ants per every human on Earth. What I want you to take a guess.
SPEAKER_02This is a really interesting question. So humans, I think there's seven uh is it like billion? I think we might be in the eights now. Or in eight billions?
SPEAKER_03I think we might be in the early eights. In the early earlies. Let's see. Let's see. Early earlies. Um 8.3. That's still early. Wow. We're not quite to the eight halves.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. That's still early earlies. So the question, so was the question was how many ants per person? Per person. I'm gonna wow, that's a really good question. I'm gonna guess like 10,000 per person. That seems like a lot.
SPEAKER_03You ready for this?
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_032.5 million. No. No. That's impossible. 2.5 million per one person. Per one person, they estimate 20 quadrillion in total. That's crazy, dude. Are you joking me? Am I serious?
SPEAKER_02Are you serious right now?
SPEAKER_03I'm just reading what NPR has to say.
SPEAKER_02Dude, okay, I didn't realize it was that high. Oh my gosh. I thought 10,000 was gonna be high.
SPEAKER_03So it was two point what was it? 2.5 million per person. That means you could own 2.5 million ants and everybody else would still have their fair share.
unknownWow.
SPEAKER_02That's really what I think we should be doing. Right. Not that I should say what we should do, but that seems like a good uh It could be a good thing. We could try. We could try. Start you know, collecting our ants.
SPEAKER_03I probably have like four just in here that I don't know about. Oh really? You know?
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Just walking around.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, they probably are in here. Yeah. Walking, but um what I mean what are your what are your thoughts on what happens after we die? I think it just goes black. Oh see that's the thing that I will think about too, and it's like that's that's a scary thought right there.
SPEAKER_03I guess, but also I feel like you don't know, you know. I know. You know. You know. No, I know that I don't know. Right. You know. I think it would be okay.
SPEAKER_02Like you wouldn't be aware of it, you know. So what do you like what do you do? You just it's like forever, you're just sitting there?
SPEAKER_03Forever for other people.
SPEAKER_02But what if you're not gonna be able to do it?
SPEAKER_03There's no I don't think there's I don't know. I don't I would I would imagine there's just no consciousness. See, this is the thing, it's hard to imagine. No consciousness. Because you've all you've just always been, you know.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I have always been.
SPEAKER_03You've always been. Well, not when we're sleeping, though.
SPEAKER_02I mean you're you're dreaming. You dream though. Yeah. But I I feel like I am like switched off for the night. Right.
SPEAKER_03You know, I'm like turning it off. If you were still doing stuff while you were dreaming, that would be crazy. Well, that does happen.
SPEAKER_02People I think they sleepwalk.
SPEAKER_03People sleepwalk, right? Yeah. They're not turned off all the way. Yeah, that's kinda kinda cool, actually. Maybe people will sleepwalk eventually when they die, and that'll be like zombies.
SPEAKER_02Oh, so they're yeah, like they're dead, but they're just they're sleepwalking.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_02So can they can they wake up at all?
SPEAKER_03Or no. Here's here's I'm gonna rectify that. Here's what I think happens. When you sleep off, you're on low power mode. When you sleep, when you sleep, you're on low power mode. Okay, yeah. When you die, you get turned off. Power off. You know what I mean? I do. They take the batteries out.
SPEAKER_02Wow. Yeah, that's like a that's like a machine. We're like a machine then. Right. Right? Yeah. Would you consider yourself a machine? I would. Okay. Okay. What do you what do you like to do as a machine? Do you like to just Well, I have to eat. Okay. And I like to do it sometimes. Yeah, I've seen you eat because you've got to be a little bit more than I don't I don't know if I've ever seen you eat.
SPEAKER_03I don't like to eat around you. Okay. Um just me? Yeah, just you. What is it about me that uh makes sense?
SPEAKER_02I don't want to, you know, show that I'm really overly vulnerable, you know, so I have to always per portray like a like an alpha dog personality.
SPEAKER_03You're kind of like that's what I like to do. Oh, okay. It's an alpha thing though. Right. It's not like like Rocky from Project Tale Mary where it's just gross in their culture to like eat in front of someone.
SPEAKER_02No. Okay. No, I I like to yeah, I like to, you know, I like to do that. So that's just why I do it.
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_02So that's why I don't eat in front of you. Um so good to know.
SPEAKER_03I think we never talked about that before, but I yeah. I feel like I've eaten a lot of foods in front of you.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I I think you have.
SPEAKER_03And a lot of times you're you're like kind of looking at them almost like you wanna ask for a bite. I have to do it. But you have really good self-control, I think.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I had to portray that I you know It's an act. It's like the alpha, like I I have I always have to try to be alpha dog in any situation that I'm in.
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_02So that's just how I was, you know, how I was born that way. Uh, I gotta continue that. So that's it. I mean, a lot of times, you know, I'll just tell you this right now, I'll get a little vulnerable, you know. Right after I'm done hanging out with you, I'll just slam a McDonald's like freaking back. Yeah, I'll just drive over there. And I just uh be careful there. Yeah, well, I don't I don't get any liquids when I'm there.
SPEAKER_03I think you're good then.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I just get solids. Yeah. Um, so like freaking Big Mac, freaking You don't wash it down with anything?
SPEAKER_03No, I'm a dry dog.
SPEAKER_02Okay. Okay. I'm a dry dog kind of guy. You know, and you heard it here first, folks. You did. I do a hash brown with the Big Mac. I'm not gonna tell you what time of day that's at, even though I I think I just did earlier. But you said whenever you leave here. Yes. Yeah, but sometimes I come here at like 6 a.m. You know, I just drive right over here really quick. Do you? Yes.
SPEAKER_03What are you doing?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I don't think you're gonna be able to do it. You hung out for like three hours that one time. Remember I knocked on the door, you said, Hey, how are you? I said, Good. Oh, that's that's awesome. This is ringing a bell now. So I came in and I said, Oh, like what day is it? And you were like Monday, and I was like, Oh, cool. So I just said, You got some time? You're like, Yeah, I got three hours. So I said, Cool. So we came into your really long living room, which is like how many feet is it again? A thousand years. A thousand years, that's right. Okay, it's a thousand years because it's like time to distance, you know, which we're still working on that conversion. The equation, yeah, the equation chart. So yeah, we came into the living room here, and don't you remember we did that fun game where you like ran you like ran down?
SPEAKER_03Oh, I tried to run as many years as I could.
SPEAKER_02Yes, and I was like yelling to you, and I said, Hey, yeah, hey Lucas, yeah, and you were like, What? I can't hear you, and I said, What? I I thought you could because you're responding, and then you just kept running.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02So is this ringing a bell?
SPEAKER_03It is, yeah. After about a year of running, you can't hear the person anymore in this room. So the other 999, you might not you might as well not even bother, you know. If you're trying to hear anyway. Yeah. Um, so then I think I can't. So it was like two years round trip.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, it was I was like way older at that point, you know.
SPEAKER_03It was like in Interstellar when they come back, and it's been like 27 years. Sure.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03I had a beard when you came back.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. You know, and I I didn't, weirdly enough. No. I think it's different. Same or is it different? I think it's different in here. I was gonna ask you in that, you know, when you're running in the living room there. Is it like what does it look like? Is it just this room extended? Or is it like, are there other things to do?
SPEAKER_03Or no, yeah, it's just it's like pure sunlight the whole time. It's actually really like for your eyes, really bad. Much easier to see coming back. Oh, because a return trip, you're looking, you're looking back at this, you know. Sure. Um, and it gets really hot in here.
SPEAKER_02So did it did it feel like two years, do you think?
SPEAKER_03No.
SPEAKER_02No, it didn't work.
SPEAKER_03Not to me like two years. It felt like two miles. So it depends on how fast you run.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_03Two miles. Probably like really fast. Eight minutes.
SPEAKER_02Oh, for two miles total? Yeah. For me? Yeah. That's that's pretty substantial. Yeah. Do you run a lot? Oh, so much. Oh, okay. I didn't realize that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_02Good.
SPEAKER_03Um I ran in between these two uh issues that we recorded today.
SPEAKER_02Did you really how many miles did you run there? Four. Four miles?
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Oh, okay. You don't even look sweaty or smell or anything like that. Oh, thanks. Pretty good. Thanks. Yeah, that's how I like gauge when people run.
SPEAKER_03How far people have run, yeah. By how sweaty and smelly they are.
SPEAKER_02Right, right. No, you look I mean you're in good shape. Like you look like you're doing well.
SPEAKER_03Oh yeah. No, definitely.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, it's great. Yeah. Um so I think either it just goes black, or maybe we are machines and we wake up in our real life. Maybe it's like a simulation kind of thing.
unknownOh, wait.
SPEAKER_02Oh wow. So right now, you according to what you're saying, right now you and I are machines. Right. Or part of one machine. Oh, like there's one like great like global machine?
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Oh.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Oh wow. Okay. Everybody is a part of that?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, but that kind of feels like solipsistic. And I don't really I don't believe in that.
SPEAKER_02So what do you uh what do you mean by that? Why does it feel solipsistic?
SPEAKER_03Because then if it's a if it's a uh simulation, then am I the only one aware of uh myself and everybody else is like NPCs or something? I don't like that. Oh, this is when you've died, right? No, like in life. Like is it would it be that it's a simulation, but I'm the only one perceiving it and you're not actually real? Oh but I don't believe in that.
SPEAKER_02No, I don't believe in that.
SPEAKER_03That's like a that sounds very selfish to think that it does.
SPEAKER_02It does sound selfish. Um that would suck. That would suck. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Because then we'd be pretty lonely. What if you got reincarnated? What would you want to be when you came back? A human again or a hawk? Toats, yeah. Nice.
SPEAKER_02I want to violate. Don't you want to fly around? Like, fuck it.
SPEAKER_03I would want to be whatever kills hawks. You bastard.
SPEAKER_02I here's the thing: nothing can kill a hawk.
SPEAKER_03Oh. Apex. Nothing. Okay. Yeah, they're the apex. You're telling me if a hawk walked up to like the alligator exhibit at a zoo, the alligator wouldn't try and bite that thing and roll around with it in its mouth? I think it would, but it would just fly.
SPEAKER_02It would start flying away. And it was like, haha, you can't fly, alligator. F you guy. Can you imagine if alligators could fly? Whoa. We'd be fucked. That would be that's insane, dude. Oh man, I'm imagining that right now. Yeah, I can tell. Yeah. Yeah. Oh my god. That would be messed up. I can just see them though, like their wings are really tiny and they're like their body is like drag, like they're like this. Oh yeah. And they're like, ah, and he's like, they're struggling. So that's like the first generation. But a couple gens down. Right. They'll have evolution would do its thing. Yes.
SPEAKER_03And then they have really like lizard wings.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah, like some lizard wings. Like that.
SPEAKER_03That would be a dragon. Yeah, I was essentially thinking an alligator could fly. That's a dragon. Well, it doesn't breathe fire though. Not all of them do. Not all dragons do. I don't think so.
SPEAKER_02Wow.
SPEAKER_03Huh.
SPEAKER_02I don't uh I've never met one though, so yeah, I don't think I have either. Um yeah, I I I I don't know. What what animal would you choose to be? Besides the one that would kill a hawk. Right. Which seems like that was kind of directed at my answer, like kind of right after I said it. I don't know where you're getting that. It seemed that I was that's just an inkling that I had.
SPEAKER_03That's always been my number one.
SPEAKER_02Oh, okay. Alright.
SPEAKER_03Forever. Wow, okay. So like if I had gone first, I would have said that, and then you would have said, Well, I want to be a hawk, and then it would have had a different connotation to it. Different connotation. But it just so happened.
SPEAKER_02How? Yeah. I went first. Because so like you would be killing me. You know, I would still as I was saying it, I'd be like, a hawk?
SPEAKER_03Like that, you know, and I'd have been like Well, the truth is that I would actually like to come back as a field mouse. That's wow. So I'm a little offended that you want to be a hawk. A field mouse. You're gonna disembowel me.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, you know what I am. You know it. My name's gonna be like Chad. It's gonna be awesome.
SPEAKER_03Who's gonna name you? The other hawks.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, one of the other hawks. I already like know a guy who's gonna be a hawk, and I put in a good word, you know.
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_02But um You got to choose? Yeah, this other dude?
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Oh, yeah, yeah, he got to choose. Yeah. He's coming back as a hawk. Oh, yeah, he is.
SPEAKER_03Why have we why have we been discussing what might happen when you die if this guy knows that reincarnation is a thing? I don't have an answer for that.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03You could have stopped this dead in its tracks. Dead in its tracks.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I I could have, but I didn't want to spring that, you know, right away. You know, I I got a lot of there's a lot of things you don't know about me that I keep kind of hitting.
SPEAKER_03I didn't know you don't eat in front of people.
SPEAKER_02Well, yeah. I mean it's mainly you. Yeah. It's just mainly you, but there's like some other people sometimes, but it's mainly you that I don't eat in front of.
SPEAKER_03You want to get a you wanna get a pizza? No. Okay.
unknownDamn it.
SPEAKER_02Surprisingly, I really hate pizza.
SPEAKER_03Strain really? Yeah, it's just actually no, not actually. No.
SPEAKER_02I love pizza.
SPEAKER_03Isn't it interesting how in this life you won't eat in front of me, and in the next life, you're gonna eat me.
SPEAKER_02That's a little ironic.
SPEAKER_03You're gonna disembowel me with your beak. Yes, I plan on doing that. By the way, I was looking up why cats bunny kick. You know this thing they do? They'll grab a like a toy with their front paws and then they'll kick at it with their back paws. Like really quick.
SPEAKER_02Is this like when they're like curled in like a ball?
SPEAKER_03Yeah. So apparently it's a it's an instinctual thing that they do to prey, where they will grab the prey with their front paws, and what I was reading was said it said uh they will attack with their back claws in disembowelment style kicks. As if disembowelment style is a thing.
SPEAKER_02That's effed.
SPEAKER_03That's scary.
SPEAKER_02That's that's pretty crazy, yeah. So he so old John Guy over. Old John Guy. John boy, he's is he doing that to little Phyllis?
SPEAKER_03Yes. Oh, all the time. If Phyllis was a living thing, she would have no bowels left. It would be disimmed. They'd be disimmed.
SPEAKER_02I was gonna say that. I did not expect to talk about Phyllis like that when I walk through these doors today. Yeah. But I don't know where she is. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03I'll find her.
SPEAKER_02But and if those who don't know, Phyllis is a little cat toy that little cat toy here at the at the pad. Yeah. Not at the pod, but at the pad.
SPEAKER_03No, I don't have it right now.
SPEAKER_02Whoa. You might want to be careful with that guy. Oh. Okay, those of you in the podcast who can't see, Lucas is flipping me off with an infinity gauntlet. And for the whole world, for that matter. So um I think we just lost our half of our listenership. Oh no. Yeah, we gotta be careful. You know what? This is for those people. Sticking to it. So, alright, so we've covered a couple good topics so far. We have. Yeah, I think.
SPEAKER_03Is there anything else on your brain?
SPEAKER_02Oh man. I I yeah, there there is. I just can't I can't like you know decipher what it is exactly. It's kind of like that smell, like when you walk outside on a hot day and you're just walking around, you know, and you're like, what's that? What is that smell? You know? Has this ever happened to you?
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Definitely.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, isn't it crazy? Like most times a smell hits me. My first thought is, what is that? Same here. What is that? Same. What does that smell make you think of? Ass.
SPEAKER_02But then here's the thing, okay? I don't see a ass around me. Okay. So then I'm like, am I the ass?
SPEAKER_03But you smell it specifically when you go outside.
SPEAKER_02Yes. Right. So I just continued to walk, and I'm like, oh, this smell of ass is everywhere. And I I remembered I put on deodorant that day. Right. Right. This was a couple days ago.
SPEAKER_03Well, would ass smell be coming from your orbits? Do you put deodorant on your ass? Isn't that Aren't you supposed?
SPEAKER_02This is on the directions, I thought. Put on ass.
SPEAKER_03I uh I'm not gonna tell you how to live your life.
SPEAKER_02So because it's it's stinky.
SPEAKER_03You still smell it. Yeah, you still smell what? You still smell ass when you go outside.
SPEAKER_02Is it working? It's stopped now. I'm telling you, I've been doing this for years. It has not failed me until this point. You've built up a tolerance. I think that's what it is. Well, now I'm I'm confused about this aluminum-free bullshit.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_02And now what's confusing about it? I think I need a ton of aluminum. Oh. Right, right up in there. Yeah. Okay. And so I think I'm gonna get back on that because I went to the deodorant style, not the antiperspirant. Right. I'm gonna get back to the antiperspirant. Um I think that's what my problem is. So that's what's really been on my brain. I couldn't, I felt a little self-conscious about talking about it with you, but I feel better now.
SPEAKER_03I don't think there's any reason for that. Yeah. Um you know what's crazy about aluminum?
SPEAKER_02What's that?
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_03You line a cooking sheet or a like a pan with some aluminum foil. You put that shit in the oven at 425 degrees. Is it you pull that out when it's done doing whatever it's doing? You touch that aluminum foil, it's not hot. Really? What's the deal with that?
SPEAKER_02Okay, I have not tested that. I So I have a question.
SPEAKER_03No.
SPEAKER_02I'm gonna ask anyways. Have you are you putting food on the pan on this foil? Or are you just putting like a bear?
SPEAKER_03Okay. Well, you I'll put the I'll put I'll have a pan, foil.
SPEAKER_02No, yeah.
SPEAKER_03Oil food.
SPEAKER_02Oh, so okay, so you have oil and food on the foil. Okay.
SPEAKER_03The food gets hot.
SPEAKER_02The pan gets hot.
SPEAKER_03The foil?
SPEAKER_02Why how does that work? Have you t you've tested this? I've tested it. You're not joking me right now?
SPEAKER_03I'm not joking you.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_03Am I serious?
SPEAKER_02I I are you? Are you serious right now?
SPEAKER_03Am I?
SPEAKER_02I I think so. Okay.
SPEAKER_03I can't tell really, but um you might just have to trust me on this one.
SPEAKER_02I don't I don't think I uh I don't know if I'm gonna try that. Um it sounds pretty cool though. Like I am interested in this concept.
SPEAKER_03I'll show you. Maybe I can maybe I can make us some uh some Brussels sprouts before you go, and we can both eat them. I'm gonna have to pass. Damn it. Yeah, I'm gonna pass on that one. You're gonna eat something in front of me.
SPEAKER_02I don't know if I am. I wanted to ask you, or actually I wanted to mention this to you, one time when I was at work. Okay, so this is a different medium we're gonna switch over to. Okay. One of my co-workers at at work, okay, we've established that's where it is. Sure. He had um tinfoil that wrapped a burger or like a sandwich, okay. He threw that puppy in the microwave, and that shit lit on fire. Okay. Why did he do that? I don't know. I think he forgot to take it off. Something, yeah. Oh no, I forgot. And it like lit on fire a little bit, and he like threw it in the sink and like doused it. That actually is a true story. That happened. Wow. So, and it I think it was like a wrapper. It was like a tinfoil wrapper. I see a spider on your wall right now. What's his deal? He's climbing, he's on the black and white poster.
SPEAKER_03You got a jumper.
unknownYeah, oh boy.
SPEAKER_02It's not an ant though. No. So far, I've seen more spiders than ants.
SPEAKER_03I keep finding these uh pretty decent sized jumping spiders in here.
SPEAKER_02Oh, that that looks like one of them, I think. Yeah. Safe bet.
unknownBet.
SPEAKER_03Out of sight, out of mind. Tell me about it, right? But he's in your sight though, huh? Well, I can't quite see him now. I think. I think he went behind a poster.
SPEAKER_02Oh, okay, good.
unknownAll right.
SPEAKER_03So Um, well, I I was gonna comment on your story that um if I try to avoid doing stuff like that, but also like and we've talked about this, I think, off mic.
SPEAKER_02Sure.
SPEAKER_03Sometimes I want a little lightning show in my microwave. Right. So I'll put I think we found the perfect numbers like eight. If you put like eight forks on the the spinning plate inside your microwave, and you just hit like you just hit 30 seconds like ten times. So what is that, like five minutes probably? Something like that. Something like that. Something like that, yeah. Um and then you just kind of sit there, you get a hell of a show. It's like 4th of July, right in your microwave.
unknownGosh.
SPEAKER_03You have to pay anything for that. You don't have to pay anything.
SPEAKER_02That's awesome. Well, I don't get why more are more people doing this. Do you know? Have you checked with anybody else if they are?
SPEAKER_03Or No, do I every time I bring it up, people give me like a weird look.
SPEAKER_02Oh, sure.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Why do they do that? They ask me if I'm doing alright. I mean it's a free lightning show.
SPEAKER_02Like I can get behind that. I don't understand why more people aren't doing this. Well, here's the question that we were I have to ask to follow up. What do the forks look like after the show is done?
SPEAKER_03Varying degrees of not much change to charred.
SPEAKER_02Oh wow, okay. That's quite a big variation.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02There. Do you have to throw them away then? Um no. You can reuse them?
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Do you are the do you just leave the forks in there like until the next time you're gonna do a lightning show? Well, what am I gonna do with them?
SPEAKER_03Oh yeah, well, we're not gonna use them then, right? Well, I might I mean I might I would, but yeah. I mean, but probably the next time I'm gonna use the microwave is for a lightning show, so I'll just leave them in there.
SPEAKER_02Okay, oh, so you are leaving them in there then. Yeah. What about like if you know Rachel or someone else has to use the microwave?
SPEAKER_03She has a bad habit of taking them out and yelling at me for doing that. Oh, oh wow. Which again, I don't I've tried to explain it. It's a free lightning show. She's like, you need to put your head on straight. You're gonna burn this place down. And I'm like, she's like, we've been through five microwaves. We've lived here four days. Oh yeah. Wow, that's a lot of microwaves. So this was in the past. It's probably gone up since then.
SPEAKER_02Okay. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03The amount of microwaves. Because we've been here several years now. Sure. So based on that rate, I don't several years worth of microwaves.
SPEAKER_02Wow, I'm sure the like the e-recycling, you're e-recycling them when you're done with the microwave?
SPEAKER_03E-recycling them. Yeah, like electronic recycling. Oh, right. Right. Um, I thought that was like email for recycling. That would be way cooler. I usually just send it into the cloud. Yeah. Yeah. Uh what I do with them is I usually try and sell them.
SPEAKER_02Oh, okay. Does anybody buy them? Or I got a guy. You got oh, okay. It's the printing press guy. Oh, okay. Are we paying him though to print our issues right now? Yeah, that's a separate thing. That's a separate thing. So wait, we're paying him, but then he pays us for the microwaves. Right. Okay, this seems pretty good. I think we're breaking even here. Right?
SPEAKER_03That printing press costs a lot of money. I didn't know. Unless we've established otherwise, which I think we may have.
SPEAKER_02I think that we did. I don't remember.
SPEAKER_03Um It felt like it cost a lot.
SPEAKER_02We did talk about this. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Compared to, I mean, he gives me like a penny per microwave. He's like, I can't. Because every time he thinks it's gonna work, he thinks it's a working microwave. And I don't know why, because I put all I put in the description is good microwave.
SPEAKER_02But not if it is functioning or not functioning.
SPEAKER_03Uh-uh. Good microwave. And he started to send me like inquiries about them now when he sees the listing. Oh, that's not good. And he'll say, Does this work? All caps. And I say, It's good. What is your response to that? He says, if this doesn't work, I'm going to kill you and your family.
SPEAKER_02Well, doesn't he doesn't he live here too? Because the printing press is in the back room, which we've established.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Right? And that's back over there.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02So would you say that he lives here or no?
SPEAKER_03Why would he live here? Well, he's working there. Printing press.
SPEAKER_02I mean He's not the printing press. No, I know, but he's he's here like printing a lot of stuff, isn't he? I run it. He sold me the machine. Oh, I thought he came in and was printing it himself. No, no, no, no, no.
SPEAKER_03For sales. For sales. Right. We have a supplier of printing presses.
SPEAKER_02So I was unclear on this whole business relationship, so I'm glad that we cleared that up here.
SPEAKER_03We've cleared up some lore. Some WPCC lore.
SPEAKER_02Yes.
SPEAKER_03WPCC. Um.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_02And uh yeah, that's good. Yeah. What? So okay, yeah, I like this. Where does Pedro Pascal fit into all of this again? Oh, his initials are PP. Oh, sure. Yeah. Sure. He was the PP guy.
SPEAKER_03Right.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Does that yeah, that clears it up? That clears up pretty well.
SPEAKER_02Cool. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um is it like you took a Claritin in those commercials where they peel off the blurry filter?
SPEAKER_02You know what? I wish we could do that in real life, right?
SPEAKER_03That would be so cool.
SPEAKER_02Wouldn't that be cool? That would be cool. No, it would be. I remember seeing those commercials like back in the day, you know, when I was like a little guy. And I was like, this is nice because it was blurry, but now it's clear. Right.
SPEAKER_03I used to try to time it on which shot it was gonna be. Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_02Like like guests, like, oh, this is gonna be the one that's yeah, where they take off the filter.
SPEAKER_03This looks blurry, they're gonna take off the filter.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_02I wonder if that stuff really works. You ever try it?
SPEAKER_03I don't think so. Maybe. More of a Zertec guy.
SPEAKER_02Oh, Zertec, okay. Fuck Clarity. You just seem like a Zertec kind of guy. Is that for allergies or which I don't ha really sometimes I do, but not much.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_03You got allergies? Nah, not not too much, thankfully. You're allergic to ass, it sounds like. Well, I'm not allergic to it, but I just don't like the smell. You never sneeze? Do I uh upon walking outside and smelling ass? No, no, no, I haven't done that before.
SPEAKER_02Alright. Here's the thing about that whole situation, I want to just kind of circle back to you really quick. Yeah. The ass is coming from my armpits. So I'm just super confused because I've been, you know, as we already established, I already, you know, I've been you know putting it on my ass, you know, because that's where it smells coming from. But it's like an armpit, so I I just can't get myself to put it under my armpits, though. I think that seems to be the problem. Why? That's where you're supposed to put it. Well, dude, the one that I bought on the back, it doesn't say to do that. It's what does it say to do? Put it on your ass cheeks.
SPEAKER_03On the cheeks? Not where I would have thought it says it would say. I'm sorry. If you were gonna put deodorant on your ass, I would think it's going in the crack.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, no, it it seems that way, but that's for toilet paper. Okay, so I yeah, it's pretty cool, dude. I I don't know. I mean it it seem I it seemed cool when I bought it, so but obviously it's kind of letting me down. Yeah. But you seem disappointed in it.
SPEAKER_03I am now, but but you've never like, you know, you walk outside on a hot day and you just smell like do you ever just smell I I think I already asked you this, but usually if I'm walking outside and I smell ass, it's because I've fallen and landed in someone's ass. Nose first. Which has happened several times more than it should happen.
SPEAKER_02Wow. Uh that seems like a bad luck streak you have there. Yeah. That seems kind of messed up.
SPEAKER_03It's alright. Well, here's the thing. I think we're running out of time. We're running out of time? Okay. But should we close up the thread from last issue about the cops? Oh, that were outside. Do you remember what happened when they came to the door? Do you want to Oh, like, yeah, because they were knocking on the door. Right.
SPEAKER_02And they I'm trying to remember now. I think they said, Hey, are are you the guys that threw something out under the the road here that created this big disturbance? Right. And Lightning McQueen was there.
SPEAKER_03Lightning McQueen. I think Chick Hicks was there too.
SPEAKER_02Chick Hicks.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. I don't remember who is that. I think he's the bad guy. Oh, is he? I think. Okay. I don't really know.
unknownI don't remember.
SPEAKER_02It's been a while. Oh, same dude. Yeah. But yeah, they was talking all like, you know, the gruff voice. Yeah, he was mad. He was mad. And but then there was like this bomb that dropped from the sky onto the same car wreck.
SPEAKER_03Unrelated, but our mics did pick it up.
SPEAKER_02Right. So then the other cop behind him said, get out of the way. And he started shooting at you and I. Oh, I remember. Don't you remember that? I remember that. Yes. And so then I I just I ran. Yeah. How did we get rid of them again? So what we did was like you, okay, so they were like shooting, you know, and you I remember you like crouched down, okay? You were like kind of crouched.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_02And then um they both were I think they were shooting at me at that point. They couldn't see you. So I like ran around and I pushed them over you and you tripped them both.
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_02And they just fell and their guns like just kind of flew across the room. And then you and I just ran out of the apartment. Did you push them? You just pushed them down inside? Yeah, it was in the apartment. It was in your kitchen.
SPEAKER_03It was right over there. Oh, okay. And then they probably came out after us and then we doubled back. Because we're here now.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, no, I I I can't remember. Do you remember what what happened when we when we got outside?
SPEAKER_03I remember getting outside and seeing the wreckage and just thinking, that's way more cars than I ever would have thought. It was like all I could see. It was a sea of cars. Like a thousand we're talking about? A thousand at least. That's dude, we there were as many cars out there as there are ants per person. So 2.5 million, probably.
SPEAKER_02Whoa, dude, we're gonna get in a lot of trouble for that.
SPEAKER_03Well, I think some of it, some of it's on the bomb. Right. Okay. And that we don't did you figure out where that came from? I have no idea. I have no knowledge on the bomb. No knowledge, okay. It sounded to me uh big. Oh, yeah, it's really big. That's really all I could tell. But so, anyways, I got out there, I saw the cars, I took one look, I said, We're not gonna get anywhere out here. It's jammed right ass to mouth with cars out here. Human centipede style.
SPEAKER_02But car style, right?
SPEAKER_03But cars. Lightning McQueen and Chick Hicks. I don't even want to talk about what I saw.
SPEAKER_02Oh man.
SPEAKER_03So I turned around, came back up, and the cops were like still, I think they like passed out. Sure. They were still on the floor.
SPEAKER_02Yep.
SPEAKER_03So I opened up a window and I just kind of picked them up. Oh. And dropped them. You dropped them? This is like a two-story house that we're in. What's the story? Like ten feet? Ten feet? Uh probably. Yeah. They're gonna be fine. Oh no. They shot at us.
SPEAKER_02They did shoot at us. I know they're. Without reason. Well, they kind of had a reason. To shoot at us? I think so. But I get it, you know, you gotta pick them up. Did did you just pick them both up by yourself, too? I mean I think I was watching.
SPEAKER_03I think uh you didn't help. No, I was no help from you. You were like, there's a spider on your wall.
SPEAKER_02There was another spider that that day. Um yeah, but yeah, it was pretty wild, man. That was it was pretty crazy. And then I think the cops just like ran away. As soon as I hit the ground, they started running. I remember that. Do you remember? Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Now that you say it, I dropped them on their legs. There was no like there was no recovery time or anything. I just dropped them and they took off. And actually, things are like pretty clear out there now. So I think they probably just maybe they had amnesia and they started they just saw a big pile up and they were like, we gotta do something about this. Oh, well, you hit him with the neuralizer from Men in Black. Oh, right. That's what happened. They forgot everything. Right.
SPEAKER_02Well, I did do that. I did have that in my pocket.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02But I think when they they started running, they went they got to the scene, which is pretty close. Pretty close. They started shooting at us again. Just to finish the clips. And they threw their guns on the ground. We're out of bullets. And then they went back and they were like, Yeah. Like trying to like like what I imagine like Minecraft is like, but like fast. Right. And then one last thing, you know, that I'm remembering, Toe Mater like stuck his head out.
SPEAKER_03Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_02He said, I'm alive. Do you remember?
SPEAKER_03Do you remember because he died in the movies?
SPEAKER_02No, I don't think that he did. Oh. Just in the wreckage. We thought he died.
SPEAKER_03Oh, I see.
SPEAKER_02But he he like he like stuck his head out, right? He like clawed his way back.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02And um if I'm not mistaken, I think another small bomb just kind of dropped. Jeez, and he was gone. So what a crazy tale.
SPEAKER_03But now we have closure on where it went and how it ended. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I feel a little better about wrapping that up.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Me too.
SPEAKER_02It seems kind of almost like a it seems kind of unbelievable in a way. Like almost like that. There's no way that could happen. But you know, it's up for the listener to decide.
SPEAKER_03What do you say? We wrap it up and we throw it out the window.
SPEAKER_02Oh, I don't think we should do that. I don't think so. We can sell it down right now. Yeah, you're right. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Put it over here. I think we maybe we learn from that one. Yeah. Alright. Well, this was an experiment. This we did.
SPEAKER_02I th I think it went fairly well. I think so too. Yeah, I think fairly well. Give us some feedback.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_02Academic only.
SPEAKER_03Right. Um and be nice only.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, just be really nice.
SPEAKER_03And just say good things.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_03That's all we ask. Yeah. That's it. All right, everybody. We'll be back next week with comics.
SPEAKER_04Woohoo!
SPEAKER_03Thanks for listening, everybody. Bye bye. Bye.