“The Difference Between Knowing and Understanding”

We hear things our whole lives…
 “Time flies.”
 “Be patient.”
 “You’ll understand when you’re older.”

But what happens when one day… you finally do?

In this episode of Mostly Me, Occasionally Wise, we take a real and honest look at the difference between knowing something… and actually understanding it.

From parenting and relationships… to the people who’ve shaped us along the way, this episode dives into how life experience turns words into meaning—and how some lessons only make sense when you live them.

Plus, a new Week in Review segment—bringing you into the real moments behind the mic and the experiences that inspired this episode.

If you’ve ever looked back and thought…
 “Now I get it…”

This one’s for you.

Thanks for listening to Mostly Me, Occasionally Wise.

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Until next time — stay mostly you, and occasionally wise.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Have you ever noticed you can know something your whole life but not actually understand it until you live it? Let's talk about that. Welcome back to Mostly Me Occasionally Wise. I am Brian, and this is episode seven, and today we're talking about something that honestly didn't hit me until I got older. There's a big difference between knowing something and actually understanding it. Because growing up, we hear a lot of things. Time flies, enjoy it while it lasts, you'll understand when you get older. I hate that phrase. But when you're younger, you hear it. And you might even nod your head like you get it, and you might even repeat it to someone else like you're wise. But deep down, you really don't feel it. You may not even get it. And that right there, that's the difference. So before we get into this week's episode, one, I need to give you guys the answers to some bonus movies I gave at the end of last week's episode. And then I want to talk to you about a new segment I want to introduce weekly into the show. So first we'll go over the movies. At the end of last week's episode, which was about comfort movies, I gave you a few bonus movies that I wanted you guys to guess. And I went over those movies, and now, like I said, I'm gonna give you the answer. We had Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves, hands down, one of my favorite comfort movies. I love Robin Williams, Morgan Freeman, Christian Slater, it's and even Alan Rickman's in it. Fantastic version of Robin Hood. If you haven't seen it, check it out. We had My Big Fat Greek Wedding, which is all Becca 100%. Movie's okay. We had The Princess Diaries. All Becca. That was 100% Becca, which surprised me because I honestly had never realized she had seen that movie. Dazed and Confused with Matthew McConaughey, you know, the alright, alright, alright. That's that's all me again. We had Julie and Julia, which is a great movie, and I enjoyed it. But again, that's all Becca. We had Holes. Hugely underrated Shia LaBoo's movie. It's a great Disney movie, but that one's Becca's. We had Hitch. Now, Hitch, Becca and I love equally. And it is a comfort movie for both of us, but that was one that I put on my list. And then we had Remember the Titans, another great classic Disney movie. That is Becca. And then last but not least, we had Uncle Buck, and I have talked about my love for John Candy in general. So Uncle Buck should have been one that was pretty easy to guess. So, on to the next thing. I want to start introducing weekly a new segment. And I I'll come up with a catchier title for it later, but right now it's it's a weekend review, and this is where I just talk about life for a minute, what's going on, you know, the real stuff behind the mic. It gives you a chance to know me a little better and my family, but it also may give you something to relate to. So let's talk about this week. So several things happened this week. We had a couple of milestones that the podcast hit. We had a hundred downloads, and we hit a hundred plus followers on the mostly me occasionally wise Facebook page. Fantastic news. Love it. And I appreciate it more than you will ever know. I started this podcast as something fun, a hobby. You know, I did it in the past with a couple of you know friends of mine, my brother and Thomas. We did a video game podcast called Hits Dark Gaming, and we did it for a year or two, and then of course COVID hit, and COVID killed it pretty much. But since then, I've kind of always had that itch there and just never took the initiative. So my wife finally was just like, just do it. Do it for fun and see where it goes. I'm not expecting big things, but at the same time, if it happens, we embrace it. But I'm really just doing this for fun and to make a difference in someone's life. And then with the Facebook page getting 100 plus followers, that was amazing, you know, because it shows that you guys are listening, you guys are sharing, you are coming back, and I'm making a difference somewhere to someone. And again, huge, huge thanks for that, and I appreciate it. So we had the milestones. We also had the editing error with my last episode about comfort movies. For those that listened, I accidentally did not take out my first take of A League of Their Own. So when I record, oftentimes I record in segments and I'll stop, I'll re-listen, and go from there. If I don't like what I I'm hearing, I'll can't, I'll, you know, I'll scratch it and start over. But, you know, a couple of things came into play here. It was late. I was tired. And second of all, my wife was here and we were having a blast just listening to me record. And, you know, she would stop me on occasions and, you know, point out some things about some of the movies she listed. But Thursday, when we were going out to lunch, we were listening to the podcast together, and I realized I left that take in and didn't take the messed mess up take out. So you heard two takes on a League of Their Owns because the first little bit you hear, and I can't remember an actor's name, who, which was Lori Petty, and so I left it in there, and I'm super hard on myself. So when I can't figure it out, I stop it and then I kind of laugh and chuckle. But like I said, you know, it kind of shows that I'm human and that I make a lot of mistakes when it comes to this podcast because I'm I'm doing it all. I'm doing recording, I'm doing the editing, I'm getting it out on social media. I mean, we're still fresh and new. There's no way I can pay for an editor right now. And to be honest with you, editing is kind of fun for me. It's giving me something to learn, you know, and to grow with. So I appreciate you listening to the episode, even though there was a minor boo-boo in it. So we had that. Of course, we had Easter, which was Sunday, so happy Easter, everyone. A couple of things with the kids. So my wife and I had to sit down with our 13-year-old because if anyone who's listening as teenagers, you know, sometimes they can just appear mad and hate the world, and you don't know why. So, being a good parent, you want to know why. And I kind of just could pick it up, you know, throughout the week, and I finally just said, Hey, why are you so angry? What is going on? Of course, he threw something else back at me in a hateful manner, so I stopped. Of course, my wife interjected and corrected the way he talked to me because he was he was disrespectful and we let it go. Well, throughout the night, he had just been short with everyone, angry with everyone. And so finally, we, you know, pulled the 13-year-old into his room and said, Hey, what is going on? And of course, he didn't want to talk about it, nor or or maybe he didn't have the words to express what's going on, or he may not even know. But he, you know, we we he had just was just not having a good day. He had hadn't had it a good past couple of weeks. And of course, as parents, you can read your kid pretty well. And so we gave him the ultimatum. Like, look, you were gonna have to figure this out because if there's something truly bothering you and you don't want to talk about it, it's not our fault because we're trying to help you. You know, if it is something we're doing, say something. We can't correct the issue when we're working on it if you don't speak. And so, you know, finally we all we all agreed that, you know, we're gonna try to work better on our communication and the way we deliver things. You know, if we're frustrated, come up with a more, you know, not necessarily delicate way, but just a respectful tone when it comes to being frustrated or how things may not be going your way. Just be more respectful in general. And then of course, my four-year-old. Yeah, I've I've talked in past episodes where he is a daddy's boy. But man, Saturday, or was it Saturday? No, it was Friday. I couldn't win with him. And he was just angry and like blaming me for everything, and finally I was just like, you know what? Here, Becca, you take him. I'm done. I need a break. But it was just kind of one of those things that, okay, you know, earlier in the week, I wasn't doing very well with the 13-year-old. I couldn't figure out what's going on there, and then now, you know, the daddy's boy is having issues with me, even though I really wasn't doing anything wrong. I just think it was just a bad week for our two boys in general. And it was just it was weird because with the four-year-old, I don't get that very often because he's he stuck to my hip half the time. But for those few hours, he wanted nothing to do with me. And so yeah, it was it was definitely a weird week. But like I said, you know, we got to celebrate uh the great podcast news, but then it was followed by the harsh reality of parenting and just having to be creative and essentially just giving your kids the what for and trying to figure out what is going on and why they are the way they are. But honestly, that's kind of what made me think of today's topic for this episode. Because even this week, there were moments I realized there's a difference between knowing something and actually understanding it. Man, it's just uh life and life has a great sense of humor and has an amazing way of giving you moments when you least expect it. So let's talk about the things that we all know early on in life. So, have you ever noticed how much advice we actually hear growing up? I mean, it's it's literally everywhere. Parents, teachers, family, even those random people who feel like they've lived long enough in life to give you a speech, probably at the worst possible time. And the crazy part is, most of that advice is not wrong. It's it's actually right. We just we don't understand it yet. I mean, like when people say money doesn't buy happiness, and when you're younger, you're like, yeah, okay, but it does help. And oh man, I was so bad about that. So I have or I had not so much anymore growing up, and then even into my 20s and early 30s, I was awful with money. I've had the big FOMO thing going, where if I didn't buy something then, I wasn't going to be able to get it later. And of course, that brought a sort of satisfaction with that. And growing up over time, I realized that, you know, having that money and then buying those things then and immediately, yeah, it's a temporary happiness because later down the road, when you've already spent that money on something that you probably didn't need, a bill comes up or an unexpected expense. Or, you know, I was divorced at the time, so I was a single father, and you know, something would come up with my daughter at the time. So, yeah, definitely you may hear it a lot, and it and it's that money doesn't buy happiness. That that that piece of wisdom gets old because you hear it a lot growing up. And it's it's funny because it's something that you still hear even into adulthood and as you grow older, but you do start to understand it more. The the next one is pick your battles. So, ooh, I still struggle with that one because I have a teenager, and there are times he has a response for everything, and the pick your battles quote does not register in my brain, and it goes right out the window, and I fall right into his trap. And so oftentimes I am talking with my wife after my moment of frustration, and I'm realizing was that a battle of worth picking? Because I've given him I mean I've given him the satisfaction of getting me frustrated, getting me worked up. You know, he he he's he's poking, he's poking, he's poking, and it worked. So, pick your battles is another one that you know you heard when you were younger and you were like, okay, I'm gonna I'm gonna fight every battle, but then when you have kids or when you start to grow up, you realize, you know, that that that quote really rings true because you know, you really do need to pick in battles, because battles in general require a lot of thought and effort. And the older you get, you realize it's just not worth it anymore. And then, of course, the big one, time flies. So I talked a little bit about time flies in my This Is 42 episode because when you're younger, time feels slow. It really does. School feels long, days feel long, waiting feels like forever. And so when someone says time flies, you hear it, but you don't understand it. And, you know, I didn't ignore the vi the advice growing up. I just didn't understand it yet because, you know, I didn't have kids, you know, I wasn't paying all these bills, I wasn't getting older. And there's a quote that I I hear quite often from the people that I you know oftentimes seek wisdom from. One of the biggest quotes is the older you get, the faster time flies. And that is probably one of the truest quotes I have heard in my adulthood. And so if you're an adult and you have kids, or you're in the process of having kids, or you're just older in general, you will quickly see if you sit down and stop how fast time has flown by. It is so crazy to even think about now. So we just talked about a few quotes that you hear growing up, and there's a million more we could probably touch on. And at the time when you hear those certain quotes, you just you you you don't understand them yet. You really don't. But then life happens, and life has a way of taking everything you've heard throughout your life and putting it right in front of you. Not not in a quote, not not in a speech even, but in real moments. Moments where you don't have a choice but to feel it. Because experience hits different than advice, it really does. You you can hear it a hundred times, a thousand times, a million times, but one real moment, it will teach you more than all of it combined. The the first time life doesn't go your way, that time you the time the first time you feel real pressure, that first time you realize, okay, this is on me now. And when you know, when that occurs, you realize things are starting to shift. And understanding doesn't come from hearing it, because it really comes from living it. And that's man, this one's hitting hard. Like, it's hitting my heart just just talking about life happening. So I've been through two divorces, and I've I've had a lot of a life experience. And in my second marriage, a common phrase I heard was, you don't have enough life experience. Don't let anybody tell you that because everyone experiences life in their own certain ways. Yes, I might not have the experience in some areas that you do, but don't let anybody tell you you don't have enough life experience. You experienced life in your own ways, and you know, there were other things in that second marriage that led to eventually us divorcing, but that was one of those big big quotes that hurt a lot, and I just don't know where it came from. Fortunately, you know, I got out of there and you know, now I'm the happiest that I've ever been. But, you know, understanding, you know, the the the speeches and the quotes you hear growing up, and then having life happen, and then of course me having to hear you don't have enough life experience, and I'm like, look, I've been through a divorce, I had to go through custody disputes over my kid, you know. At the time I was working a dead-end job, don't don't tell me I don't have life experience. So if you're listening and you have someone that's telling you consistently you don't have enough life experience, just hold out your hand and say no. Because just because, again, I don't have the experience you have doesn't mean I haven't experienced it in other ways. So just just tell that person to shut up and sit down. Jeez. Oh, I hate that quote. Man, I hate that quote. So let's talk a little more about the wisdom I heard growing up, and of course, when life occurred, and I realized, oh, okay. This is what you know, what my mom's told me, or what my you know, friends have told me, or my mentors have taught me, they're really starting to show their face now. One thing that really, you know, changed a lot of the way I interpreted and understanding was when I became a parent. And I'll be honest, nothing made the it made it nothing made this more clearer than being a dad. Because of kids, I knew things. I knew kids needed patience. I knew that parenting wasn't easy. And 'cause I I gave my I gave my mom hell. I knew you had to be present. And I knew all of that. But knowing it and living it were two completely different things. You know, my four-year-old, I knew patience mattered, but now I really have a better understanding of what patience really is. It's not just waiting, it's about staying calm when you're tired, showing up with energy, even when your your gas tanks aren't empty. It's it's it's choosing to love in moments when frustration would be ten times easier, like I talked about earlier, when I just couldn't win with my four-year-old. I I was frustrated, and that's why I chose to high-road and handed it over to mom. And of course, mom was able to, you know, hey, calm him down a little bit and just try to figure out. I don't even really remember what was bothering him, but of course, we move on to my 13-year-old, you know. I I knew trust was important. And I understand now how long it can take to build, how fragile it can be, and how sometimes it's not about saying the right thing, it's about being consistent enough that that you're that they start to believe you. And we're having moments, and we will have those moments. It's amazing when you have those moments to cherish those. And of course, uh, my 19-year-old. I always knew that kids grew up. Everybody says that. But knowing it and actually watching it happen, it hits different. I mean, it's real. It's one of those moments where you sit back and go, man, they weren't lying. That one hits hard a little bit. I mean, parenting didn't teach me new ideas, it made me really understand the ones I already heard. And if there's one place where the difference between knowing and understanding really show up, it's in a relationship or in relationships in general. Because just like everyone, everything else, you grow up. Up hearing things like communication is key, don't go to bed angry, it takes work. You hear it again and again and again but we really don't understand it yet. Because relationships will teach you things, a lot of things, that no advice kids ever ever could. You really don't understand communication until you realize it's not about talking, it's it's it's about being heard and making sure the other person f you know feels heard too. I so I have I didn't have the greatest childhood growing up and you know, going through two failed marriages and then just trying to figure myself out and who I really was, communication wasn't and sometimes isn't the easiest thing for me because I struggle with being afraid what the other person feels. So growing older, you know, my wife and I have been married for ten years and it hasn't always been easy, and communication has been probably one of the biggest issues we've had because we love each other so much that there are times that we keep our thoughts in and we don't, you know, allow our allow ourselves to be hurt uh be heard. And it took us going to a church class to learn that. And so, yeah, communication is a big one. You really don't understand it until you you know until you've experienced how powerful it is. Patience, patience is another one. Yeah, you know, you you don't really understand patience until you're in a moment where it's it would be easier to react than to pause. Patience a big one. And then of course, compromise. You don't really understand compromise until you you know it's you see that it's not about winning, it's about choosing each other. And I think one of the biggest things I've learned besides, you know, compromise, being patient and communication is that being right and being in a healthy relationship is not always the same thing. I mean, in fact, some of the the most right I have ever been were s also some of the worst wrong moments in my relationship. And that's a tough realization because when you're younger, you think about if you're right, you stand on it, you defend it, you you prove your point, and as you grow, you start to understand sometimes the best move isn't about proving you're right, it's it's about protecting your relationship. Understanding teaches you that, you know, it teaches you how to say something. Matter, you know, matters just as much as what you say. And you can know how to love someone, but understanding how to love them takes time. And and let's be real, there there are definitely moments where I thought I handled it perfectly, and looking back, no, no, I didn't. I, you know, yeah, I mean, there's no other way to say it. Yeah, I didn't. And just like everything else we've talked about, relationships are one of those places where life turned knowledge into understanding. And you know what else I've been thinking about? A lot of the understanding I have today didn't just come from what I went through, you know, going through life. It came from the people around me. Because when you really look at it, there are people in your life who gave you wisdom, or even still give you wisdom, without realizing it. So I I want to give a shout out to several people that have meant a lot to me over the years, that have really taught me a lot of things, and maybe not even realize it. I want to start off with my best friend Robbie. I have known Robbie since fifth grade, and the wisdom he has taught me over the years is uh, you know, one, friendship. Now, friendships go through different phases in life. You know, obviously growing up when we've known each other in fifth grade and all the way to junior high and high school, we saw each other every day. We had fun, you know, we learned, we grew together, but then we kind of went our separate ways, but we never lost touch. You know, we still hung out, we still caused trouble, you know, and we became adults. But I have o I've realized over the years, especially now, you know, especially when I had my daughter, that we couldn't hang out all the time. And the the the best piece of wisdom he he has taught me so far is that with with the type of friendship we have, it's special. For one, of knowing each other as long as we have, but knowing that I could go a week or two weeks without talking to him or checking in, maybe even a month. If something comes up and I really need him to be there, he'll be there. And to me, that wisdom and just being there and that kind of friendship is just man, it it's it's special. And I hope, you know, if you're listening, you have that one friend. You need to hang on to him because they're one in a million. That they really are. The next person is my father-in-law. Mike, Mike. I'll just I won't say his last name, but Mike. Now, he has really been a driving force of being a father figure. My father and I weren't close growing up, and he was yeah, I oftentimes joke that I'm his favorite child, and he'll play along, and we're good, we're good sports about it. I think it may upset the my wife's younger sister, but you know, I still love you, Kristen, and I'm still the favorite child. But with Mike, he has done several things for me. He has shown me what a good father is. He has shown me what a good man, a good man who is really deep in his Christian values. I struggled with faith growing up. And, you know, yes, when I met Becca, she introduced it to me, but being around Mike and seeing how involved he is with church and how he implements all of God's teachings with what he says and does in life, that has impacted me. And the wisdom he has given me along the way, it has allowed me to grow my relationship with God so much that when I was thinking about being baptized, and which I was, he was the first person I went to because there were a lot of questions I had, and he was there for me. And then now seeing him with my kids, he is showing me what I'm trying not to get emotional talking about it. He has shown me what an amazing grandfather should be. And Mike, I know you're listening. I appreciate you. I appreciate you being an amazing father figure to me, and I appreciate you being an amazing grandfather to my kids. Means a lot, and you're teaching me things without even saying them, and that that's pretty powerful. Ooh, boy. Next is Uncle Rob, uh, probably one of my biggest fans. I talk to him weekly about the podcast. He gives me pointers because he's a tech guy, he's a tech savvy guy, but he has been really big. He he adopted one of his kids, and so he has seen the struggles I have gone through with the 13-year-old, and he has he has been a huge I don't know, uh, melting pot of wisdom uh when it comes to the day, you know, going through dealing with kids with past trauma. He has just he has prayed with me, he has lifted my spirits up when I have just been so hard on myself about how I handled certain situations or when I'm even doubting myself as a father. He he has the best way I can explain Uncle Rob is he is you take the word hug, and when you make it into a physical form, that is Uncle Rob. He gives you the best hugs of any man I've ever gotten a hug from. And it's one of those hugs that I could be having the worst day possible. But it he g he gives me a hug, you know, when I see him, you know, family functions and things like that. It it just man, it just it's a really good hug. So find yourself a good hugger because you don't realize how important a good hug is until you have someone that just man, Uncle Rob, you are the master of hugs. So but he has thank you for continuing to be with me and guiding me through, you know, having kids with past trauma and and reminding me that I'm a good father, even when I'm so hard on myself sometimes. It's just it means a lot, and I appreciate you, brother. Let's talk about one of my best friends, Brett. Now, Brett, I met later in life, met through church. He was a youth minister, and then now we're just best friends. We talk about anything and everything. We are both nudes, we talk about gaming a lot, we talk about movies, we talk about books. But he, just like Mike, has been really big on my faith and making my relationship with God a lot closer than it used to be. And he has also shown me that it's okay to throw yourself out there. Like I'm a small group leader now. We lead a small group in our home every Wednesday, and that's something five years ago I had never even thought about. And, you know, having Brett in my life and just being able to pick his brain, you know, about Christianity and understanding the Bible more. It's Brett, I don't know what I would have done without you, man. And last but not least, oh boy. Just talking to my wife about it today made me realize how much I miss my grandmother. Ooh. I'm sorry, guys. I'm sorry, not sorry. My grandma Alina, she passed away several years ago to cancer. And she she's taught me so much. Things I still use today. The biggest thing is she had so much fun living life, and it was there's a phrase that you hear often, you know, don't take life so seriously because you never make it out alive. That was one of the biggest things I got from her. I find humor in everything, probably more than I should at times. Gets me into trouble sometimes. It makes things awkward. But there are a lot of times when I'm talking, you know, to my kids or something funny will happen. I wish I had my grandmother here because I would love to call her and just tell her, you know. And even when my daughter went through her about with cancer, I really missed her then because I didn't really understand, and I'll never understand what my daughter went through, but I really could have used my grandmother's guidance. Man, you don't you don't realize how how important grandmothers are until they're not with you anymore. And grandma, I know you're up there, and I miss you a lot. I really do. And I hope I'm making you proud. I definitely had to pause after talking about those who have impacted me. Oh, man. So let's continue. If you're listening to this and you and you've ever taken the time to give it give someone advice or or just tried to show up on your um, you know, in the right way, even if it didn't seem like it mattered at the time, it probably did. More than you will probably ever know. And I think, you know, that's that's another part of this whole idea. Understanding doesn't just come from what happens to you. It it really comes from the people who have poured into you along the way, who have had that faith, who have pushed you even when you didn't want to go. You know, it gave you that swift kick in the butt when you needed it. And so here's the hard part that nobody really ever talks about. Understanding usually comes late. Like later than you'd like. Sometimes after mistakes, sometimes after you wish you could go back and make it different, sometimes after you've already learned something the hard way, and and that's tough because you start to you start realizing a lot of things you understand now, especially in relationships, you you wish you understood sooner. In relationships, it's it's and how you spend your time and what actually matters. But that's how it works. Nobody, you know, hands you understanding early. You earn it through moments, through mistakes, through life. And and and let's let's be real a second. There are moments in life where I thought I understood something. Uh and I absolutely did not. Like parenting. Before kids, I was like, oh yeah, I got this, raise them, you know, raise them right, be consistent, no problem. Yeah, okay. Parenting says, hold on to your butts. And relationship, man, relationships will humble you quick. Like those moments where you think, I'm about, you know, I'm about to explain this perfectly. I've got the perfect points, I'm 100% right here, and five minutes later you realized this wasn't about being right at all, or or yeah, it's yeah, I've been in a lot of those moments. My wife and I laugh about them now, but in the moment, ugh, I tend to open my mouth and insert my foot a lot. But, you know, another thing is when you say something in your head and it sounded fine, like respect, you know, like a respectful, logical, made total sense kind of way, and then the reaction you get is like, wait, how did we get here? That happens a lot. I I tease my 13-year-old, we kind of tease back and forth, you know, like, did you do you ever think before you speak? And and we jokingly talk about it, but there's also a little piece of wisdom that I'm teaching, you know, I'm just, you know, I'm I'm I'm throwing his way, but at the same time, you know, I I I I hear that from my wife, and it's yeah, it's done in a joking manner, but it's her way of saying, hey, maybe you should just stop and just think before you act or before you speak. I think a lot of men struggle with that. And so if you're a man listening, I feel ya. Yeah, it it happens. But, you know, just go give your wife a hug, a little, a little pat on the butt, and everything will be, you know, alright. And of course, let's not forget those moments where you're in an argument. And you're 100% sure you're right, and like you're ready to stand on it, defend it. Maybe even double down a little bit. Like you're just oh, I'm pumped. I know I got this. Finally, once in my life, as much as my wife is right, I've got I've got this one, I've got this one up on her. And then you realize, yeah, I wasn't, I wasn't right at all. Or even worse, I might have been right, but I handled it completely wrong. So, you know, I thought I understood relationships until under, you know, relationships understood me. And honestly, if wisdom comes from learning, you know, if wisdom comes from learning from your mistakes between parenting and relationships, I honestly should be a freaking genius by now. So let's talk about where I'm at now. I think I I'm starting to understand, and that understanding changes how you move. Not just what you know, but how you live. You you start to slow down a little more, you start being more present, you start listening more than talking. You start realizing not that not everything needs a reaction, not everything needs to be fixed, not not everything needs to be controlled. You start to realize listening matters more than reacting, especially in relationships that matter the most. Understanding changes, it really changes how you move and not just what you know. Boy, this one's deep. This episode's deep. I may have to go give my wife a hug after this. But you know, this life has a way of teaching you things. Not when you're ready, but honestly, when you need it. And maybe that's the point. Maybe you're not supposed to understand everything right away. Maybe you're you're supposed to grow into it piece by piece, moment by moment, lesson by lesson, and maybe that's what turns knowing into understanding. And a lot of those lessons, they don't just change how you think, they they change how you show up for the people who matter the most to you in your life. So let me ask you this. What's something you've heard your whole life that only recently started to make sense? Something uh, you know, something that at one point you knew, but now you you actually understand it. You you you fully embrace it. You're like, huh, I get it. I honestly would love to hear it. You can reach out on our Mostly Me Occasionally Wise Facebook page or even email me at mostlymecontact at gmail.com. I really do want to hear your stories, your lessons, the things life has taught you along the way, because we're all figuring this out together. And as always, thank mostly you, occasionally wise, and then you can see that.