The Power of Showing Up: Megan’s Story

Some people impact your life in big, obvious ways. Others do it quietly, consistently, and without ever asking for recognition.

Megan is one of those people.

In this episode, we sit down with someone we don’t know all that well—but who has already made a meaningful impact on our lives. What unfolds is a powerful conversation about family, loss, resilience, and what it really means to show up for others.

Megan shares the story of her family’s journey through unimaginable challenges: losing her brother in a tragic accident, walking through her sister’s battle with cancer, and navigating another sister’s sudden stroke. These are the kinds of moments that change you forever.

But this isn’t just a story about hardship.

It’s about what happens after.

It’s about the people who step in when life falls apart. The neighbors, friends, and community who don’t back away—but lean in. It’s about how those experiences shape the way you live, the way you give, and the way you love.

Today, Megan pours that same energy into her family, her work, and the countless people she encourages every single day. She reminds us that impact doesn’t always come from grand gestures—it often comes from consistency, presence, and simply being willing to show up.

If you’ve ever wondered what real strength looks like, this conversation will show you.

Shut Up & Love Your Neighbor is a weekly conversation about listening better, slowing down, and loving the people right in front of us. In a world that rewards volume and certainty, this podcast explores presence over performance, curiosity over commentary, and connection over division.

Each episode features honest reflections on real-life moments — the things seen, heard, and experienced in everyday life — followed by unscripted conversations with rotating guest hosts who come ready with real questions. Sometimes we laugh. Sometimes we sit in tension. Occasionally there’s a little brown water involved. But always, the goal is the same: to practice being more human with one another.

This isn’t a show about having all the answers. It’s about asking better questions. It’s about listening longer than feels comfortable. It’s about choosing kindness in small moments that often go unnoticed.

If you’re looking for perfection, this isn’t it. If you’re looking for thoughtful conversation about relationships, empathy, faith, leadership, and community — welcome.

Shut up a little more than usual.

Love your neighbor — the one right in front of you.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:06

Hey everybody, I'm Dave.

SPEAKER_02 0:07

And I'm Megan.

SPEAKER_01 0:08

And welcome to Shut Up and Love Your Neighbor. Hopefully you have a chance to follow us on the gram. It's the Dave. If you have thoughts, suggestions, or complaints about the podcast, you can hit us up at Dave at shutupandlovyourneighbor.com. But uh for now, let's just get into it, right? I am uh joined by my buddy Megan, and uh I'm gonna introduce her in just a second. Uh, but first I want to give you a pretty cool update. Uh, we'd like to start off each podcast with an update of something really fun or cool or challenging that's happened recently. And uh, and it's very recent, like minutes ago. Uh so yeah, we were um we were hanging out at a brewery down the road, uh, producer Candy and myself, and um just having a good time at almost 80 degrees here today. Um, I'm pretty hot in this beanie and switch, if I'm being honest. And uh gonna have to address that going forward. Um just having, you know, having a good time, enjoying the weather, and um got a text, pretty exciting. I said, uh, oh, Candy, Megan's texting us.

SPEAKER_03 1:19

Sure was.

SPEAKER_01 1:20

And uh, and that text said, I'm here at your house. Uh and I immediately thought about whether or not today was March 9th.

SPEAKER_02 1:31

It sure is.

SPEAKER_01 1:32

And uh, as it turns out, it is March 9th. And uh that's when we that's when we set up to do this here podcast. I mean, and here we are. We are doing the podcast, but I will say that that text did come into my phone about an hour and a half ago. So that's the local, the latest update. And uh no, thanks for your patience. Thanks for hanging out. So uh typically the Shut Up and Love Your Neighbor podcast, at least up to this point, has had, you know, people that have known me for a while. Um, there's some people kind of on the docket coming up that have known me for a while. Um, and we're always talking about, you know, how to love your neighbor, how to be a good neighbor, how to navigate through challenges and difficult things going on. So, what's cool about this is we're going to get to know our neighbor in real time. So uh this is a great example. You might have seen uh a short little piece we did on uh Instagram uh a month or so back. It was on Megan, it was about the impact that she's had on producer Candy and myself. Um and you know, that can happen, right? You can have people in your life that you don't necessarily know very well, but they can still have a positive impact. And similarly, we can have a positive impact on other people's lives while not necessarily having to become best friends with them, right? I mean, I I shared a story on uh one of the last episodes about a waiter and somebody in a restaurant and an impact that we had on them, and I we've not talked to them since. Um this is a case of that. So we don't actually know Megan very well. So we are going to get to know you, Megan. You're gonna get to know us. You've gotten to know a lot about us in the last 90 minutes, um, that's for sure. So um let's start by saying welcome.

SPEAKER_02 3:35

Thank you. Thank you for having me.

SPEAKER_01 3:37

Welcome to our studio.

SPEAKER_02 3:38

I love it.

SPEAKER_01 3:40

Um, and I'm gonna ask you to uh pour us a little brown water. We're we're digging on the plant's gold. It seems like with a start like we just had, we need to go high end. So I'm gonna let you pour us just a little bit. It's almost my bedtime, so same, right? Don't oh my gosh. Okay problem. Let me help you out.

SPEAKER_02 4:02

Okay, there we go.

SPEAKER_01 4:04

Uh and then while I'm pouring that, I'm also gonna let you know we like to give all our guests a little gift, and we are gonna give you what we refer to as the OG shirt.

SPEAKER_00 4:16

Okay, I'm gonna leave this right behind us.

SPEAKER_01 4:18

Leave that back there. Oh, wow. Oops, I mean that's a solid splash right there. So it's hey, I'm all about it. Cheers. Okay, cheers. All right, we'll take a sip here. That's delicious. That is tasty, yeah. All right, so we like it. Um so we see you about three times a week. Let's start with that, right? Um, it's like FedEx, right? We do more before 7 a.m. than most people we know. Um, so we we do a little workout. We've been doing it for about a year and a half. Uh well, I know, a little over a year. Already our first fact check from producer candy in real time. Uh a little over a year. Uh, and it has been life-changing, transformative, right? That that's not an overstatement. Um, and so first I just want to start, you know, just in general. Like, how long have you been a trainer?

SPEAKER_02 5:28

I have been a trainer at Bern for almost six years. Okay. But I started about 13 years ago before Byrne opened.

SPEAKER_01 5:38

I know how old you are, so that was just after college, maybe. Yes, a little after college. Way after college. Okay, sorry. All right, but that was trying to be nice.

SPEAKER_03 5:48

Thanks.

SPEAKER_01 5:49

Um, okay. And so, like, have you always been athletic and yes, I grew up playing sports.

SPEAKER_02 5:56

Um, right out of college, I worked in retail, so I didn't necessarily have the time.

SPEAKER_01 6:00

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 6:00

So as soon as I got into the job that I work now during the day, I found a little bit more time and was able to get certified. And it just I just love it.

SPEAKER_01 6:10

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 6:10

I love it.

SPEAKER_01 6:11

And what uh what do you what do you love about it?

SPEAKER_02 6:14

The people.

SPEAKER_01 6:15

Hello.

SPEAKER_02 6:16

Hello, the people. Um, the relationships with the people, yep. Um, I think that's my favorite part.

SPEAKER_01 6:23

Okay. Uh and what like does it ever occur to you? Do you ever I kind of probably know this answer, but um do you ever like pause and think about the impact that you're having on people's lives? Do you get a lot of feedback and you go home and go, oh man, I'm really impacting people.

SPEAKER_02 6:44

You know, it's funny. After you made that video, I thought about it. I don't know that I've thought about it that much until then. So um that was really cool. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 6:54

Yeah, okay. All right. Um, because I mean, I can tell you, uh judging by the comments from that video, uh, and I recognized I I think there was quite a few people from Byrne that commented. Yeah, I recognized quite a few of them, but um, yeah, it's like we go through sometimes, I think it's a good illustration, actually. We go through life, right? And we we we're trying to get through the day, we're trying to get the kids to all the sports, we're trying to get work done, get the groceries, get dinner, all of the things that we do. Then it's bedtime, so on and so forth. And so um, you know, people who are impacted by you uh also might not have a chance to pause and think about that. So when when, you know, that story, I think probably the same was true of a lot of people that that go to the gym uh to have a chance to pause. All right, cool. So that's you've been doing that for six years. And in your uh in your day job, you're an HR consultant. Right.

SPEAKER_02 8:02

Okay, and you've done that for how long four almost 15 years, actually, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 8:07

Okay, man. That's how long Candy and I have been married. Not quite, actually. Almost 14. But I always I always round up.

SPEAKER_02 8:18

Yeah, you can round up. And I like fives, so you might as well just like go 15, 20. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 8:23

Yeah. See, when Candy turned 35, I told everybody it was her 45th birthday. And when she turned 40, I told everybody she was 50.

SPEAKER_02 8:29

Okay, that that's not good. Right? Don't round up. I do like to round up.

SPEAKER_01 8:32

Uh so anyway though, okay. So you're married. I am, and you have three kids. Yes, tell us about that.

SPEAKER_02 8:41

Oh my gosh. Well, my husband and I were high school sweethearts. That's been fun. Um, so we've been together, I think. I should know this. I can do the math. 26 years, maybe?

unknown 8:52

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 8:52

A long time. We've been married almost 17.

SPEAKER_01 8:55

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 8:56

So wow. It's been a fun, it's been a fun journey. Um, and we have three kids. They're all two years apart, and they're all having birthdays right now. So I think I know. Eight, ten, wait, eight, almost ten, twelve.

SPEAKER_01 9:09

Eight, almost ten, and twelve. Okay, I mean, those are solid ages. I mean, I feel like nowadays those ages are like the busiest ages. It's very busy and fun. That's what I'm thinking.

SPEAKER_02 9:20

And it's also crazy to think that our 12-year-old, Corey and I met when we were 14, 15, that she's so close to when we met that age, which is crazy to think.

SPEAKER_01 9:32

I mean, that's the kind of stuff that scares children. Yeah, it's really scary. Yeah, yeah. I know. We've heard similar types of comments and whatnot from uh other friends, and it yeah. Yeah. That's when you're like, oh wow. Um, so how do you manage to so you so you you work as a trainer, what, three to four days a weekish? Yes. Something like that. Full time in your other job.

SPEAKER_03 10:00

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 10:01

Three kids and a husband on top of all of that.

SPEAKER_02 10:05

Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_01 10:06

Wow. So how do you how do you feel like you balance all of that?

SPEAKER_02 10:11

I think my my husband, Corey, and I have a a great relationship. Um, we're a team, so we are able to, you know, bounce things off of each other, help each other out when we need to, and then I'm very routine. Um, so I think that helps when I can have a routine.

SPEAKER_01 10:27

So you're structured.

SPEAKER_02 10:28

I'm pretty structured.

SPEAKER_01 10:30

I'm wondering, uh, so I want to figure this out for a second. Okay, let's do it. Um and you'll see where I'm going.

SPEAKER_03 10:38

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 10:39

Uh so when we first started the cocktail videos by accident, uh, we didn't get far. Uh and by far, I mean I got to the second video uh when I realized I didn't have all the ingredients for the cocktail I wanted to make. And so then we knew Candy needed to come and step in and do her little spreadsheet stuff and all the fancy organization stuff she does. Um, and then more recently, when I didn't realize that I was supposed to be at home to record a podcast, um her reaction was, okay, I think I'm gonna have to take that over. I think that's good. So that's a good thing. So when we're at the the gym, we have a very similar vibe of bantering, a similar sense of humor, all of that. But I'm wondering if you're not some sort of a uh what's the word? Uh not uh cross between candy and I, personality-wise, like you're organized, structured, into the details, right? Yep, are you into the details?

SPEAKER_03 11:55

Very much into the details.

SPEAKER_01 11:58

I was gonna say, but you're fun, but I'm fine, and I didn't mean to say that to insinuate that candy's not funny.

SPEAKER_02 12:04

Candy's so fun. Candy is so fun, especially when she picks up heavier weights than you, right?

SPEAKER_01 12:09

I mean, all right, that's not part of the we'll edit that out. Okay. Um so anyway, um, so let me ask you this. Is is there any and it and it's any answers, okay? But I'm just curious, like once you had a chance to to kind of pause uh after that video and think about the impact that you have on people, was were there any type of deeper reflections that you went through? Like, did you see other areas in your life where you have an impact or other areas of your life where maybe you want to have more of an impact? Or did you think about, you know, maybe how your kids see you in that light as well? Like what kind of what transpired for you uh, you know, when then that came out?

SPEAKER_02 12:57

I think it it went back to yes, I realize that I've had an impact on people, but I don't think people that are at the gym, for example, have had such an impact on myself.

SPEAKER_01 13:09

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 13:09

So I that's kind of where I went with that. Um again, they're there coming in for a workout, but they don't realize too that it's it's getting me up. It's getting I'm motivated because of what they're coming in and doing daily, you know, on a daily basis. So I think it kind of reversed there.

SPEAKER_01 13:29

Okay. All right. I didn't see that coming. That's good. That's uh some good insight, good reflection there. I like that. Um okay, so let's talk a little bit more history.

SPEAKER_03 13:43

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 13:44

Okay. So you grew up where?

SPEAKER_02 13:47

A town. Well, I was born in Florida, and then we moved to uh Fishersville, Virginia. It's about two hours from here, and that's where I spent most of my childhood. Fishersville.

SPEAKER_01 13:57

I'm familiar with Fishersville, and for you are yeah, for people listening, you don't have to look it up. You might not you might not find it on the map. It's pretty small, right? It's pretty small. It is pretty small. Yeah, I'm yeah, I think we've driven through there.

unknown 14:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 14:10

Off 81, 64. Yep. Yep, yeah right at the cross. Yep. Um, and so growing up, you had siblings. Yes. How many siblings?

SPEAKER_02 14:22

I'm the oldest of six.

SPEAKER_01 14:23

Wow, you're the oldest. Look at you. Big sis.

SPEAKER_02 14:26

We grew out of a van. So my parents, my dad bought a van, a hotel van.

SPEAKER_01 14:31

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 14:32

Had it painted because it had probably like holiday and money.

SPEAKER_01 14:37

I worked in the five.

SPEAKER_02 14:38

It was an airport, it was an airport van to transport, so we each had our own bench.

SPEAKER_01 14:42

And I used to drive.

SPEAKER_02 14:44

That's what I learned to drive.

SPEAKER_01 14:45

That's in the van.

SPEAKER_02 14:47

I drove to high school with my learner's permit every day.

SPEAKER_01 14:49

In a holiday and van.

SPEAKER_02 14:50

Well, it was it was baby blue by then.

SPEAKER_01 14:52

Right. But still underneath.

SPEAKER_02 14:54

Yeah, and my dad tried to tint the windows himself. That went not well.

SPEAKER_01 14:58

I mean, but what a cool dad.

SPEAKER_02 15:00

Cool dad. Right. It was really he's a really cool dad.

SPEAKER_01 15:03

All right. So, okay, tell me about your siblings.

SPEAKER_02 15:07

So I have, I'm the oldest. I have another sister who's 15 months younger. The third child is my next sister, Jenny. Then I have a brother, Chris. I don't know how old he was. How did I know the age difference now? He was like six. I was six when he was born, I think. Okay. And then my brother Nick, we were seven years apart. And then my youngest sister is 13 years younger than me.

SPEAKER_01 15:32

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 15:32

So there was a big gap between the first and the last.

SPEAKER_01 15:35

Yeah. I mean, that's a love story right there, if I've ever heard one, right? I mean, keep the home fires burning. Yep. Oh, this is a PG. Sorry. Um okay. And so you've you've known uh struggle, challenge, heartache.

SPEAKER_02 15:55

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 15:56

Whatever, whatever word we wanna we want to put on it. Tell me a little bit about that.

SPEAKER_02 16:01

Um let's start with your brother. Let's start with my brother. So my brother, almost seven years ago, was in a car accident and died, passed away. Um that was something none of us had ever experienced. Um, he was only 26, so it literally was life and just in a snap, flash, he was everything changed.

SPEAKER_01 16:25

And did he live up here or did he live in Fishers Hill?

SPEAKER_02 16:29

He lived back home, yep.

SPEAKER_01 16:30

He did. Is everybody else still down in Fishersville?

SPEAKER_02 16:32

No, nobody's down there. Okay, we're all spread out.

SPEAKER_01 16:35

Everybody left.

SPEAKER_02 16:36

We have Florida covered, Myrtle Beach, Lexington, not too far, okay, um, Durham, and up here.

SPEAKER_01 16:42

Okay. Okay. Um my parents are there. How did your family navigate that tragedy?

SPEAKER_02 16:52

It was pretty, it was pretty tough.

SPEAKER_01 16:54

Um, lean on each other a lot.

SPEAKER_02 16:57

Yes, definitely. Um, the community, super helpful, friends, family, um the church, my parents' church, super helpful. But yeah, we definitely relied on other people at that time for sure.

SPEAKER_01 17:11

Yeah. So I mean, yeah, we we not unexpectedly per se, but have experienced lost ourselves, and I think I mean, people coming around you, uh, friends, neighbors, faith community, um is is huge. So um, okay, and then also your sister, right? She had oh I'm sorry, that's right. There's two sisters. You know what?

SPEAKER_03 17:43

There's two sisters, but two of them are.

SPEAKER_01 17:45

I mean, right, okay. So, and here's why I just made that mistake, because only yesterday did I even learn about the I didn't know about that. And here's here's side note. You've never told me in a conversation, I don't know if you realize this, about your brother or your one sister that I knew about. You make comments in passing at the gym, and and we kind of pay attention to what people say. Yeah, right. That's how we piece your story together um without actually having a whole conversation. So, okay. So let's start with um not your sister that you just texted me about yesterday.

SPEAKER_03 18:31

Okay. Okay. My other sister in Florida.

SPEAKER_01 18:34

As it turns out, you didn't give me quite enough. Go ahead.

SPEAKER_02 18:38

Um, I don't even know how many years ago that was. Uh maybe two years ago. My sister, I had just been on spring at spring break in Baldhead Island with her. Um, she's four years younger than me. She was training for uh Boston Marathons.

SPEAKER_01 18:53

She had qualified and I'm sorry, this is how how long ago though?

SPEAKER_02 18:57

About two years ago.

SPEAKER_01 18:58

Okay, so recent.

SPEAKER_02 19:00

Two, but it could be three. Okay. Coming up. Oh my gosh, I'm terrible with time. Yeah. Time's going by so fast. Um two or three years ago, it was spring break. She met us at Baldhead Island. We spent the week with our friends um on vacation. She then we came back up here. She drove by herself to Florida down 95. Uh, the next morning, again, she's a runner, she works out every day. She went to her gym. While she was at the gym, uh, one of her friends, friends next to her noticed that she was just trying to do like a jump in jack, I think, and warm-up and was actually having a stroke. So thank goodness this friend was familiar with the signs of a stroke, were able to get her an ambulance, get her to the hospital. Um, she's there by herself. And it was tough being, you know, all of our families up here. But her friends that stepped in, her neighbors that stepped in, just amazing. Um, I was able to fly down there a few days later once she was out of the hospital. She in return ended up back in the hospital when I was there. But um yeah, she thankfully, because of this, her friend of hers at the gym, she didn't have any um long-term issues afterwards. Right. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 20:15

So she quick uh I don't know what I was gonna say, quick recovery. So fully recovered.

SPEAKER_02 20:21

She's fully recovered. Yeah, she the Boston Marathon would not let her defer. So that was the biggest upset for her, but she's still running.

SPEAKER_01 20:29

In the grant scheme.

SPEAKER_02 20:30

She's still running, you know. And she just had a baby I just went to visit. Um that was okay.

SPEAKER_01 20:36

So that's yeah, so that's yeah, yeah. I remember when she was pregnant. She comes, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 20:43

Oh, yeah, she was working out.

SPEAKER_01 20:44

She was working out here. Yeah, I remember that. Um wow, okay. So that's really over the last seven years, that's a lot. That's a lot. So and I think, well, and before I say this, let's okay, so let's talk about your other sister. So tell me that story.

SPEAKER_02 21:09

So that story, um, I'm the oldest, my youngest sister, who's 13 years younger than me. I was in college or just getting ready to graduate college, and she was having a pain in her leg. And, you know, she was almost 10. We just thought it was growing pains. Um, I gave her a pair of my old shoes. She was like, oh, maybe it feels better. Um, but my mom just knew something was off. She wasn't able to like run to the bus stop and do certain things that she usually could do as a 10-year-old. Um, so thankfully they went and got her checked out. Turns out she had a five-pound tumor in her leg, um, osteosacoma. Five pound in a 10-year-old. So she was literally turning 10 the next week. Um so um they got we went to Richmond. I must have had. Just graduated. Um, so I was with them. We went to Richmond, had doctors' appointments to see what the plan was. And at first the doctors were saying to amputate, which happens a lot with that type of cancer. Um, but my dad wanted he was gonna see if there was anything else that could be done to save her leg. And it turned out she did a 15-hour surgery at Johns Hopkins where they were able to use cadaver bones, a bone from her other leg, a bone from her hip to redo her, basically reconstruct her whole leg. Um so she went through that process. That was it was insane. The amount of just full-time help she needed. Um, again, neighbors coming in, the church coming in, everybody coming in to support. My parents both work full-time. Um at that time I worked in retail. So I would sometimes close the store down and then drive over the mountain to UBA where she was getting, she had I think three more years after that of chemo and different treatments. Um, but she's cancer free and just had a lot of people. That's 15 years ago. Yeah. No, it's been 18 years.

SPEAKER_01 23:08

I thought you said 2010. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 23:11

No, she was 10.

SPEAKER_01 23:12

Oh, okay. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 23:14

Remember, I'm not good, I'm not great with time.

SPEAKER_01 23:16

Well, and I'm not great with hearing.

SPEAKER_02 23:17

So between the two of us, we're a great combo.

SPEAKER_01 23:21

So still though, so Johns Hopkins, which we're familiar with. Um a year or three more years after that.

SPEAKER_02 23:33

She did treatment at EVA. Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_01 23:37

Do I remember she was in a wheelchair for a couple years? Yeah, well.

SPEAKER_02 23:41

I was getting married, so her goal was to be able to walk at my wedding. Right. Which she did.

SPEAKER_01 23:47

And now she's totally recovered.

SPEAKER_02 23:49

She had a major back surgery. Again, we're not great with time, two or three years ago. Some time ago. Some time ago. The chemo, I mean, three years of chemo just tears your body apart.

SPEAKER_01 24:00

So she's had issues from that, but um, she had a major back surgery where again she was in a physical therapy rehab center for a little while, but um she is otherwise, she's she's yeah, yeah, and just had her first baby.

SPEAKER_02 24:15

First baby on January 1st. So yeah.

SPEAKER_01 24:18

And when was the other baby born from your other sister?

SPEAKER_02 24:21

Oh my gosh, this is gonna be awful. I thought that February uh okay, so very close together. Yeah, oh yeah, they're like a month apart, just over a month apart.

SPEAKER_01 24:30

And if you got that date wrong, sorry, everyone will know it.

SPEAKER_03 24:34

She will.

SPEAKER_01 24:35

Um wow, okay, and so another cool part about and let me let me pause and get because I'm not good with names, and I'm gonna make some effort here. And I'm not good with so your brother's name, Nick. Nick.

SPEAKER_02 24:51

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_01 24:53

Uh, your sister had the stroke. Her name is Jenny. Jenny. I love that you are like you're you are thinking really hard. Maybe I should take yours. All right, Nick, Jenny, and Courtney. Courtney. Okay, I got it.

SPEAKER_02 25:10

But I I I I also have to get I also had a br my other brother, Chris, was at Virginia Tech when he was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:21

Well, you didn't tell me that you just sprung that one over.

SPEAKER_02 25:25

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 25:25

Oh, wow. And how long ago was that?

SPEAKER_02 25:28

I'm not gonna even try to guess the amount of years ago. It was a while ago. He was in college. Okay, so it's been a little while.

SPEAKER_01 25:33

And he's okay.

SPEAKER_02 25:34

He's great. He's his wife is pregnant with their second.

SPEAKER_01 25:39

I mean, that's a lot of victory. It is for one family, like for real. That's a lot of victory. Um okay. So Nick, Jenny, and Courtney.

SPEAKER_02 25:53

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 25:56

Okay. All right.

SPEAKER_02 25:58

Don't quiz me anymore.

SPEAKER_01 25:59

That's gonna, that's gonna be a highlight, actually, right there. How I promote this podcast. Uh don't don't quiz me. Okay. So one more thing. Can I grab this?

SPEAKER_03 26:12

You sure can.

SPEAKER_01 26:12

Okay. So Courtney was featured in a book, correct? And this book is called Who I Am American Scar Stories. Yes. It's by Jenny Cutler Lopez. Do you guys know her?

SPEAKER_02 26:27

So I one of my clients was actually the photographer for this book, and we were just chatting one day at one of the our client meetings years ago now. Um, and somehow this came up and he was like, Oh wow, I'm I'm taking pictures for this book. Your sister's story would be great. And they contacted her and my mom.

SPEAKER_01 26:48

And she's the first story.

SPEAKER_02 26:49

And she's the first story in there.

SPEAKER_01 26:51

I mean, no other way to be, but number one, right? That's what I like to say. All right, I'm gonna read this. It's not very long, but I'm gonna read it so we can share this story. How does that sound? It sounds good. Are you okay with that? I'm gonna use my narrating voice now. So don't uh did you notice when I posted your video, it was like a deep.

SPEAKER_02 27:11

It was I was like, are you going to Hollywood to like be on movies? No.

SPEAKER_01 27:15

Okay. One summer, not long after her operation, Courtney wore a swimsuit to a beach on Virginia's coast. Still conscious of her scars, she tried to ignore the strangers staring at her legs. Eventually, one woman walked over to ask Courtney how she got her scars. Courtney responded, Shark bite, watch out if you go in the water. Now, 15 and confident, Courtney has blossomed since that day at the beach. She's not 15 now. No. Okay. I think we knew that. Right. All right. Uh she embraces her scars and the story behind them. Her journey, a remarkable one. She says, My scars show what I've been through. My scars are a part of who I am. She exposes her scars whenever she plays basketball or dresses for a high school formal. She wears shorts through the long, humid summers in her hometown of Fishersville, a town of 9,000 people tucked in Virginia's rural farmlands close to the Blue Ridge Mountains. But her confidence and wit didn't guarantee her a spot on the high school junior varsity basketball team. The summer before freshman year, Courtney trained six days a week for fall tryouts. She practiced her jump shots and ball control. She relearned how to sprint. She lifted weights at the gym four times a week. And when she showed up for tryouts, it signified a victorious end to four years of physical therapy, two years in a wheelchair, and one year recovering from a broken disc in her lower back, all the result of a 10-inch tumor in her left leg. So so far, your story is accurate. During the winter of 2008, just before her tenth birthday, Courtney complained her leg hurt. Having raised five other children, her mom Jane chalked up Courtney's pain to run-of-the-mill childhood mishaps until she watched her daughter half run, half limp across their yard to catch the school bus. Jane called the pediatrician who suggested Jane take Courtney to see her husband, an orthopedic surgeon. After x-raying Courtney's leg, the doctor returned to the examination room with tears in his eyes. Within a week, a biopsy confirmed their worst fears. Courtney began chemotherapy at University of Virginia Hospital. After three months of treatments, Courtney and her parents agonized over the next step: amputation. Jane says, When Courtney was sick, we kept her involved in every decision. So together they decided to heed the advice of the only surgeon at Johns Hopkins University who encouraged her to skip amputation and undergo surgery. The surgeon removed the tumor, muscle tissue, nerves, and skin from her right leg and upper left thigh, guaranteeing an arduous and long recovery. But Courtney kept her leg. The surgery proved to be the first step in a four-year marathon of recovery, but the people of Fishersville wove a web of support around them. Courtney still appreciates what her neighbors, teachers, and friends did. Let me say that sentence again. Courtney still appreciates what her neighbors, teachers, and friends did for her during the first year of recovery. She says, Everyone came forward, no one backed off. For the first year, neighbors delivered three meals a week to the house, helping alleviate the stress, expense, and management of preparing dinners for the family of eight. Jane returned to night shifts at the hospital. Her husband went back to his day job, and friends scheduled morning visits to ensure Courtney ate a good breakfast and stayed off her recovering leg. Two daily, hour-long dressing changes on Courtney's incisions continued for months, and people from their church laundered the dirty bandages. Each day, the handicapped bus pulled into the driveway to pick up Courtney for school, and the community continued to donate gift cards, toys, and meals to the Ott family. That's your maiden name.

SPEAKER_05 31:15

Let's get pretty quick.

SPEAKER_01 31:17

Illuminating a generous community, protecting one of its flock. In Fishersville, Courtney is not just the girl who beat cancer. She raced her way to the title of 2010 Superstock Soapbox Derby winner for the Blue Ridge region, competing against kids from across America at Nationals in Akron, Ohio. She's the voice behind public service announcements. I want to hear more about that. She's a family girl. She's the sibling who labored at physical therapy three times a week until she could walk down the aisle as a bridesmaid at her big sister's wedding. Oh, that's what you just mentioned.

SPEAKER_03 31:52

That was me.

SPEAKER_01 31:52

She's the young woman so inspired by the pediatric nurses, spending time with them whenever she visits the hospital for follow-up scans. She wants to become a pediatric nurse after college. And not least of all, because of her never give up attitude. Courtney is now a starter on her high school junior varsity basketball team. What a great story. Pretty incredible, right?

SPEAKER_05 32:14

That is pretty incredible.

SPEAKER_01 32:15

Um there was dang, I wish I wanted to close that. Um so I mean scenarios like that, when I read the part about the neighbors and the friends and the church and so on and so forth, um, you know, leaning in, basically, is how I would describe that. Um I have a story and I'm I won't share it now. It'll be on the next episode, actually. Um but of someone who came in my life that I describe to people when I tell the story, uh, because it was a very dark period uh for me. Um all he did was get down in the mud and help me until I was ready to get back up. And that's kind of what that that reminds me of of people coming around um and just you know, just doing what needs to be done, serving, you know, uh loving all of that. So yeah. So what a great story. Thanks for bringing that.

SPEAKER_02 33:19

Yeah. I hadn't pulled that out in years.

SPEAKER_01 33:22

And what made you think to pull it out?

SPEAKER_02 33:25

Because I remember my parents having to go back to work, and literally I would come home from work and there would be five different people in my house helping, whether it was I mean So you were thinking it reminded you thinking about people doing good and helping.

SPEAKER_01 33:40

It's oh that's so awesome.

SPEAKER_02 33:41

Yeah. Um there's no way they could have done that, gotten through that without we couldn't have gotten through that without without people, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 33:49

Absolutely. Um, and I think there are so many stories like that, and there are so many people out there that don't have that. Um that's like one of the big motivators for me is I think about, and we're not gonna make this about my life story, but I've shared bits and pieces, so on and so forth, right? If I gave you the crash course, since you don't know everything about me in my life story, I would tell you uh I was sexually abused as a child, I dropped out of high school, I did drugs, I joined the military, my parents divorced, um, I went through a bankruptcy, I've had cars repossessed, I've been in addiction recovery, like, and then I met Candy. So that's literally the story. I'm not kidding you. Um, yeah. So um my point with that, I was like, why did I just share all that? My point with that is that at so many points along the way, um looking back now, like if I come in contact with and I and I have and I do um other men that are like 30 years old, I very much kind of inject myself into their life uh with unsolicited advice or you know, encouragement or whatever it might be, because I'm always thinking about wow, if I had somebody in their 50s pouring into me at that age, how different it would have been. If I had somebody mentoring me, if I had somebody coming alongside of me during the difficult times and so on and so forth. And I never did, even when I asked for it, didn't get it. Um, and so that is uh I think one of the, it's not the only, but it is one of the main fuel sources for kind of how we live and why we live that way. Um, so so let's um let's talk about something fun. How about that?

SPEAKER_02 36:01

That sounds good.

SPEAKER_01 36:03

All right. So uh what do you do for fun?

SPEAKER_02 36:08

What do I do for fun?

SPEAKER_01 36:09

You work out?

SPEAKER_02 36:10

I love to work out. Don't let me miss a day or I'm gonna be angry.

SPEAKER_01 36:14

What about vacation? Are you saying we're keeping you here too late?

SPEAKER_02 36:18

No.

SPEAKER_01 36:18

Oh, you're not gonna miss tomorrow because you don't work tomorrow. No, man, you get to sleep until 6 a.m. you think.

SPEAKER_02 36:24

6 a.m. I sure did.

SPEAKER_01 36:25

What a luxury. Um, yeah. So what do you do for fun? So, like with the kids, do you guys like to go on trips? Yes. Do you have date nights with your husband? Are you able to work that in every now and then? Yes. Do you have people that can watch the kids?

SPEAKER_02 36:39

Our daughter's almost old enough.

SPEAKER_01 36:41

Oh, yeah. Pretty much, but almost. So what have you done up until now?

SPEAKER_02 36:44

We have a great neighbor, but she's in college right now.

SPEAKER_01 36:47

Okay. Okay. So you can't.

SPEAKER_02 36:48

Yeah, we have great neighbors to help babysit. Okay. Um, what do we do? Oh, we love to go travel, take the kids' places. We leave them sometimes, but most of the time we take them with us. You take them with you.

SPEAKER_01 36:59

Okay. Okay. And they play sports.

SPEAKER_02 37:01

Lots of sports.

SPEAKER_01 37:02

Big into family. Okay. Um, what uh I'm gonna give you a qu uh a chance to ask me some questions. Okay. So what would you, you know, this was a get to know you, and I just asked you a bunch of personal questions. Um this is your chance.

SPEAKER_02 37:23

Okay. Well, I know the answer to one of my questions.

SPEAKER_01 37:25

Then why would you ask it?

SPEAKER_02 37:26

Well, I'm not now. Like, what do you do for fun on a Monday night? Oh, well, this is a good one. Wednesday night, a weeknight. What are we doing for fun? We go to.

SPEAKER_01 37:34

Well, we go to a brewery. Monday nights are um Monday nights are pretty predictable for us.

SPEAKER_05 37:41

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 37:42

Because we struggle with the adjustment of going from the weekend back into the work week. Okay. And so by the time we make it through the first workday, uh, like I had food that I was gonna cook tonight. No, and as soon as the end of the day came, I went into canning. I said, So what do you say we go to a brewery and just get out of here? And she she didn't argue.

SPEAKER_03 38:07

Perfect.

SPEAKER_01 38:08

And she didn't ask me, Are you sure you don't have anything on your schedule tonight? She didn't she didn't check anything, right? There was nothing on the calendar because Dave didn't put this on the calendar. Yeah, so we we like to do that. We too like to travel, we like to spend time with friends. Um, we're pretty involved. Um, well, we're reasonably involved uh in church. We teach some different things there. Um like to sit bourbon, like to make cocktails on Friday nights and post it on Instagram. Uh what else do we do? We hike, we like the outdoors, I like to off-road. How many more things would you like to? We like the beach, right? We do all those things.

SPEAKER_02 38:53

Where's your favorite place you've ever, the two of you have ever gone?

SPEAKER_01 38:56

Uh, that's a great question, and it's an easy answer. Uh, we just talked about this the other day.

SPEAKER_02 39:01

So Candy has the same answer?

SPEAKER_01 39:02

She she would. Okay. Um if she had a microphone, which we're still working on.

SPEAKER_02 39:06

We should work on that.

SPEAKER_01 39:07

Well, everybody wants her to be on the mic. So uh two years ago now. It was two years ago, unfortunately. I wish it was like coming up and not in the past, but uh we took a like 10 or 12 day trip uh to Moab and Colorado. Uh-huh. Uh and the first couple nights, uh, we stayed in, you know, a glamp. What'd you call it? You know, glamping. It's uh yeah, it was a it was a tent, but it was a pretty large, sturdy tent built on a platform. Uh but we were about five miles off of any road that people would drive on. Five miles. We were very, very far out there in the middle of nowhere, um, you know, at the big cliffs all around us and everything. When we went to sleep, and it was a very comfortable mattress. Okay. Uh, and it was chilly. It was chilly at night. Uh, and uh so when we went to sleep, and and you know, we were laying next to each other, I opened my eyes and I could not see her.

SPEAKER_02 40:26

No, why?

SPEAKER_01 40:28

It was that dark. Oh, oh my god, yeah, it was that dark. She disappeared.

SPEAKER_02 40:32

I thought she liked it. She left.

SPEAKER_01 40:35

Uh no, it was that dark. It was it was the darkest of dark, like no light from anything. And then when we woke up, we were going to see the sunrise at Arches uh National Park, and we'd never seen so many stars in the sky. Like it was unbelievable, unbelievable. So we went there. Then after a couple nights there, we drove to um Colorado, a little place called Dunton Hot Springs. Used to be a uh mining town way back in the day. Uh a family bought it, turned it into an all-inclusive hot springs.

SPEAKER_03 41:14

Oh, that's cool.

SPEAKER_01 41:15

Yeah. And it um it uh there's only like 10 cabins. And when we went there, there you know, wasn't that many people there. Uh so the three different hot springs, two of them are outdoors, so there was snow all around us, and you could get in the hot springs, or you could go uh inside of this like um I don't know, structure that the other hot springs was in, and there was a steam shower in there and a fireplace. Like it was it was just unbelievable. And then we drove from that place. There's no TVs there, by the way. I like no real cell reception, like it just was so amazing. There was like four feet of snow on the ground or three feet of snow. Uh, it was just phenomenal. And we drove from there to the other side of that mountain, it's Telluride, and we hung out there uh for a couple nights, and we went snowmobiling at 11,000 feet on fresh white powder.

SPEAKER_03 42:12

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 42:12

So it was just, I'll have to show you some pictures. Yeah, that's cool. It was unbelievable. Nice, unbelievable. So that's the best vacation we've ever been on.

SPEAKER_02 42:20

Now you have to do it again.

SPEAKER_01 42:22

People asked us when we showed them pictures when we got back, like, oh my gosh, you guys gonna go back? And both of us are on the same page from the beginning.

SPEAKER_02 42:30

We're like, no, because you want it to be that memory?

SPEAKER_01 42:34

If we try to go recreate that, we will be so disappointed, right? I mean, because at the hot springs, at the hot springs, uh, one of the mornings, late morning, whatever it was, we went and um they gave us like it was make your own uh adult hot chocolate or coffee or whatever. So we made hot chocolate with all kinds of different spirits in it. And we got on a horse-drawn sleigh with two real cowboys and took us through the forest in the snow. Uh it was, yeah. I mean, it was like you were in a movie. I'm not kidding you. It was like you were in a movie. So it was pretty, it was pretty awesome. So I don't think we'll I don't think we'll do it again. Uh we'll look for something uh comparable, but um, yeah, that was that was the best one.

SPEAKER_03 43:29

Sounds fun.

SPEAKER_01 43:30

You get one more question, and then I have one one question for you.

SPEAKER_02 43:34

One more question. Well, how did you and Candy meet?

SPEAKER_01 43:37

Oh boy. Did we is that a good story? That is a good story, but it's uh it's not a short one. I'm gonna give you the cliff notes and then we'll make a point on a future podcast to give the whole thing. Um, that would be a great debut for Candy.

SPEAKER_02 43:53

Oh to come on and tell that story. I can step in as the producer that night. Okay, that sounds fair. Um

SPEAKER_01 44:00

Um, so long story short, we met um a friend of ours. Well we didn't know each other at the time, but uh a mutual friend of ours was teaching a co-ed Bible study with only women. So it wasn't really co-ed, but he asked uh the the ladies asked, you know, where are all the single men? So uh our buddy Shannon, he did the best that he could do. And he got three men, but they weren't single. Oh no. So we showed up for a few weeks and uh and then I then I didn't show up anymore. Um so that's when we first actually met. Okay. Then we um got connected. Okay, yo I it's late. It's past our bedtime. Uh it is, it is. Um uh what was I saying? We got connected on Facebook after you initially met her. A year later. Oh, okay. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 45:00

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 45:01

And um I was actually at a restaurant near her house with a mutual friend, and this is when uh the check-in feature on Facebook first came out. There's a check-in feature where you can check in at your location.

SPEAKER_02 45:13

Oh, I remember that.

SPEAKER_01 45:14

That's how people find you and like that's come and gone. Yeah, that's that's so that's not even a thing anymore. But when it was new, it was like, woo! So I did it for the very first time at this restaurant. Oh, and she saw you and she saw it, and she commented, and she said, Hey guys, that's that's right around the corner from my house. Next time, let me know, so on and so forth. So when she commented on that post, what do you think went through my mind, Megan?

SPEAKER_02 45:40

Uh, I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 45:41

She's into me. Yeah, I think so.

SPEAKER_02 45:43

Yeah, she's checking, she is checking your check-ins, right? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 45:47

I mean, that's a new thing. That's a new thing. So, anyway, we started hanging out. Uh, it was about two to three months something. We're a little foggy on this. And I was telling everybody that I work with, you know, that I was dating this uh hot chick and life was good. She wasn't telling anybody.

SPEAKER_02 46:07

No, she wasn't.

SPEAKER_01 46:08

Because as far as she knew, she wasn't dating anyone. We were just hanging out as friends. So there was some confusion at first, but I got Candy up to speed eventually. And uh I will just say she said, You wore me down. Oh no eventually, friends came into town and we were all at a bar in DC, and um under the influence of a couple of cocktails, uh, she confessed to our other friend, he's kind of growing on me.

SPEAKER_02 46:38

I think she was madly in love.

SPEAKER_01 46:39

Like a wart. Probably so anyway, from that point, then we really started dating, and uh like eight or nine months later, we were married.

SPEAKER_03 46:50

That's wow, that's a good story.

SPEAKER_01 46:51

Right.

SPEAKER_03 46:52

I like it.

SPEAKER_01 46:53

So here's my last question for you.

SPEAKER_03 46:56

All right.

SPEAKER_01 46:57

What does shut up and love your neighbor mean to you?

SPEAKER_02 47:01

Shut up and love your neighbor. I think how you can finish your drink. Um to me, it means showing up. Um, it means showing up without necessarily being asked or wanting anything in return. Um and I've seen that throughout my life from a young age and continue that now. Um trying to pass that on to my kids too, that we can do things for for neighbors, for friends, for family. Um, and we don't need to expect anything back from that. Um, it might be down the line that maybe you need something and a neighbor steps in to help you at that point. So um I think that's yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 47:43

I was gonna ask specifically about the shut up part, but well, we don't say shut up in our house.

SPEAKER_02 47:47

Right. So when I was telling my kids that today, your neighbor, my daughter said, Mom, that's a bad word. So we we we just said be quiet.

SPEAKER_01 47:55

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 47:55

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 47:56

Well, we do have uh on the storefront, we do have the the shirt for people in those scenarios. That don't say shut up, it says it just says talk less, love more.

SPEAKER_02 48:05

Okay, that's perfect. I'll let my kids wear that one to school. GG 13.

SPEAKER_01 48:09

Um cool. Uh well, this was fun. This was a lot of fun. This was a lot of fun. It's uh it's interesting to me, I would point out. I don't know uh I don't know what your position is on immigration. I don't know what your position is on global warming or who you voted for. And yet, look at look at the connections.

SPEAKER_03 48:34

Lots of connections.

SPEAKER_01 48:35

You know what I mean? Uh those are things that that divide people. And that's one of the things we we don't understand really. So we're hoping that more people just forget about that kind of thing.

SPEAKER_02 48:46

Put your energy into the things that really matter.

SPEAKER_01 48:48

Exactly. Exactly. So cool. All right, well, next time you come, you'll have to bring your husband. And uh think he would love this.

SPEAKER_02 48:55

And I'm gonna be producer candy.

SPEAKER_01 48:57

He'd be into it, and we'll we'll put candy over here at some point. Um, but in the meantime, we like to tell everybody when we leave what they need to do, right? Shut up and love your name. Cheers. Cheers.

SPEAKER_05 49:08

All right.