Shut Up & Love Your Neighbor

It Feels So Good to Say Yes | Jason's Story

• Dave • Season 1 • Episode 8

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0:00 | 39:11

Some friendships start with a big moment. Most of them don't.

Jason and Dave met in a local Facebook group, kept a loose digital eye on each other for a while, and then Jason did something most people don't do — he offered to help. He's been behind the camera and the edits on the podcast ever since.

On this episode, Dave finally turns the lens around on Jason — the guy who designs command centers for a living, travels to places most of us couldn't find on a map, and quietly lives this whole message in everyday acts.

In this episode:

• Designing command centers for the Caribbean Commissioners of Police • Why "they get paid to do it" misses the point • Afternoon tea at Quattro Goomba (yes, really) • The Facebook group that turned into a friendship • Stacking your own plates and what it actually signals • Why politics and religion don't matter to this message • Need is what's in the middle • Jason's two-word answer: say yes

Chapters: 00:00 Intro & a Midwinter Night's Dram pour 01:00 The white box and the red mug 02:00 Jason's week in Suriname 03:00 What he actually does for a living 06:00 Afternoon tea at Quattro Goomba 12:00 How Jason and Dave actually met 13:00 Stack your own plates 15:00 "But that's what they get paid to do" 18:00 Why Jason jumped in on the podcast 24:00 Leading and building community 27:00 What the SULYN movement adds 33:00 Politics, religion, and what's actually in the middle 36:00 It feels so good to say yes 37:00 What Shut Up and Love Your Neighbor means to Jason

Read the full blog post: https://shutupandloveyourneighbor.com/blogs/blog/jasons-story-the-guy-who-showed-up

Wear the reminder: shutupandloveyourneighbor.com

Feedback, comments, complaints: thedave@shutupandloveyourneighbor.com

Follow along: Instagram: @its_the_dave Facebook: facebook.com/david.dority YouTube: @shutupandloveyourneighbor

Shut Up & Love Your Neighbor is a podcast about the small, steady ways people choose to show up for each other. Started by accident. Done on purpose.

Shut Up & Love Your Neighbor is a weekly conversation about listening better, slowing down, and loving the people right in front of us. In a world that rewards volume and certainty, this podcast explores presence over performance, curiosity over commentary, and connection over division.

Each episode features honest reflections on real-life moments — the things seen, heard, and experienced in everyday life — followed by unscripted conversations with rotating guest hosts who come ready with real questions. Sometimes we laugh. Sometimes we sit in tension. Occasionally there’s a little brown water involved. But always, the goal is the same: to practice being more human with one another.

This isn’t a show about having all the answers. It’s about asking better questions. It’s about listening longer than feels comfortable. It’s about choosing kindness in small moments that often go unnoticed.

If you’re looking for perfection, this isn’t it. If you’re looking for thoughtful conversation about relationships, empathy, faith, leadership, and community — welcome.

Shut up a little more than usual.

Love your neighbor — the one right in front of you.

SPEAKER_00

Hey everybody, I'm Dave. I'm Jason and welcome to Shut Up and Love Your Neighbor podcast. Hopefully you guys can follow us on the Instagram. It's the Dave. And of course, if you have complaints, comments, feedback on the podcast, you can you can email Jason. Not me. At the Dave at shutupandlovyourneighbor.com. Jason, welcome my friend. Thank you, sir. Good to have you here.

SPEAKER_01

Appreciate it.

SPEAKER_00

As always, I cannot wait to tell this story together. Right. But before we get to that, I want to ask you if you'd like to have a little brown water. Of course. All right. Just checking. I thought maybe you wanted it right now, but this is uh this is used. That was mine. Okay. I might have had a little bit before.

SPEAKER_01

That's cool. And we're about to re meow.

SPEAKER_00

Alright. So this is uh this is a midwinter night's dram. Have you had it before? I have not. Alright, neither have I. That's not true, Jason. I did have a taste. You did before. Yeah, yeah. As you just said. But uh I am excited to have a little bit more with you, sir. Cheers. Cheers. All right, let's see what we're about. That's a solid pour, actually.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, that's good stuff.

SPEAKER_00

I got nothing. You got nothing? No heat? No.

SPEAKER_01

No, no.

SPEAKER_00

Wow. Okay. Alright, cool. So listen. Uh the other thing that we like to do, and we'll get into your story and kind of background and all of that, but we do like to give a gift to everyone that comes on the podcast, and you are no exception to that, my friend. Well, thank you. Okay. Appreciate it. It is the infamous white box. The infamous white box. It is. Now, there is um a lot of wrapping and whatnot in here. Right. But it is the coveted red shut up and love your neighbor coffee cup. Very cool. Are you a coffee drinker? Of course I am. All right. So you're going to be drinking it out of that cup? I will be. Walking around the neighborhood? Sure. Okay. I just want to make sure.

SPEAKER_01

And I'm I also wanted to uh adorn the hat. So previously I forgot about that. Yeah, I was given a hat. And it's looking good. Yeah, you know what? It's pretty solid.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. Now comfortable. I will tell you that I have worn this hat now through several countries since you had given it to me.

SPEAKER_00

Say more.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. So uh I just got back two days ago from uh Suriname, okay, South America.

SPEAKER_00

Yep.

SPEAKER_01

Was down there for a uh a conference of the Association of the Caribbean Commissioners of Police. Okay. And every year they have a uh a conference to try and help talk about you know how to make everything better, safer, do things better, blah, blah, blah. And uh every year it's in a different Caribbean nation.

SPEAKER_00

Okay.

SPEAKER_01

So last year it was in Georgetown, Guyana, South America. Uh, highly do not recommend ever going there. All right, that's not an endorsement. Yeah, no, no, definitely not. Um, while we were there, um, actually somebody was staying at our hotel and it actually got macheted um a block and a half from our hotel.

SPEAKER_00

Wow. Yeah, it's all right, it's terrible.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, we way to be dead. Of my birthday, appreciate it. Yeah, yeah. So uh we were um everywhere we went, we had a police escort. So they would load us all on a police bus. They would have um typically a whole bunch of uh police on motorcycles blocking everything off, and then it was like fast and furious Guyana wherever we went.

SPEAKER_00

Wow, yeah. So every day it was back and forth.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, we thought we were, yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Well, I mean that was the vibe. That was the vibe, yeah. Okay, I like that.

SPEAKER_01

And um, so we were uh we were literally with um, so I'm an exhibitor, was an exhibitor, so uh I design and build control rooms and command centers uh for military and government and a bunch of other things. And um, you know, we were sort of supporting the cause by helping them understand, you know, different chunks of information they could bring in from all these different uh sources to be able to be more uh educated on what's going on, things that maybe you know they're tracking for um you know political instability or whatever, and especially in the Caribbean nations. Um this is what you do for work. Yeah, this is this is what yeah, this is this is what I do for a living. So um is it always that cool? Uh no.

SPEAKER_00

Okay.

SPEAKER_01

No, no, it's usually not. In fact, uh next week, well, uh in a week from when we're filming this, yeah. Um, I'm actually gonna be in Fort Worth, Texas for the Department. I'm sorry, the Texas Department of Emergency Management Association's conference again happens every year, and this one happens to be in Fort Worth, at least the last two years running. I don't know if it'd been anywhere else. I've just been at the last two years.

SPEAKER_00

That one sounds a little safer. Yes, it's a lot safer.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, but you know, it is what it is. So I mean we do all kinds of, you know, anything if you're uh um you know watching TV or movies and you end up seeing a command center or uh a big video wall or anything, I I design those. That's what you do.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, that's what I do. Man, okay. So you you made me think of like when I was active duty stationed in Saudi Arabia. This was years ago. It might have been before you were born, if I'm being honest. Um probably not, but it was in the Intel Center, right? And I mean, and it was a big wall, yeah, everything that you're talking about, and there's a lot going on in there. I don't know if you noticed while you were telling that story. I'm a little concerned about who might be listening in because the lights behind us came on as you were it was it was very dramatic.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, well, you know, we do a lot in the intel community, so yeah, like you know who knows?

SPEAKER_00

Who knows? They could be in on it. Could be any so that's uh so that's something you've been up to recently. Yeah, yeah. Um I've I feel like my story might might be on par with that. Uh I was I was in attendance at an English tea uh recently. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, and uh so was I, as a matter of fact.

SPEAKER_01

In fact, uh I was sitting right next to you.

SPEAKER_00

Yes, yes, you were. You were all right. So you know the story.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, no, I might I still think you're gonna tell it right now.

SPEAKER_00

I am, I am. I am gonna tell the story. Um, and I I don't know if everyone out there has has engaged in an English tea. Is that what it was called? An English tea experience? Yeah, it was uh afternoon tea. Yeah, which was different than English tea.

SPEAKER_01

Well, it it was English.

SPEAKER_00

It was. Yeah, we're I don't know if it's different. Well but it was in the afternoon.

SPEAKER_01

It was good. Well, actually, you know, my wife um has been now to several English tea sessions. Okay, not in that same location, but across the variety. Yeah, in English, in actual English, yeah, like true English.

SPEAKER_00

So how did she so okay, so let me give it a context, and then I want to know how how did she rate that experience? But so um this is gonna make perfect sense to everyone. This was at a local brewery uh where they serve cocktails, wine slushies, and they also host afternoon tea.

SPEAKER_01

In addition to wonderful pizza, by the way.

SPEAKER_00

They also do have I I thought about including the pizza bounce. Yeah, yeah. That's a lot of things they're doing.

SPEAKER_01

I'm sure that my wife is begrudgingly going to watch me on camera now at some point. Yeah. Um, and if I don't mention the pizza, uh, and I think that we can, I mean, we can probably name drop. We can name Quatro Goomba. Quattro Goomba. Yeah, excellent. In Northern Virginia.

SPEAKER_00

That's right. Did you Oh man, we're gonna be all over the place on this podcast. I can feel it. Did you with the pizza during COVID? Yeah. They crushed it. Oh, dude, it was they crushed it. It's one of those things.

SPEAKER_01

I think it's the only reason why they were able to persist.

SPEAKER_00

That's what I'm saying. Yeah, it's like a lot of people were really hit during COVID, and this brewery has pizza that, and I know we're not the only ones, like we will we go there for the pizza. Yep, right? Uh it's that good. And it's very indifferent.

SPEAKER_01

And my wife has to have a bottle of wine.

SPEAKER_00

So it would be a pizza.

SPEAKER_01

So so they have a wine, it's nonas red wine or no's something. Yeah. And um, she calls it the pizza wine.

SPEAKER_00

Okay. So it's a good pairing.

SPEAKER_01

It's a great pairing. Okay. And even if it's not, I mean, it's still wine and that worked. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

So it's always a good time to have it. During COVID, when nobody could go to the breweries, they basically took the ingredients to the pizza they made and they created kits, and you would drive up and they would drop it in your back seat and you'd take off. Yep. And we cooked that pizza at home, I don't know, probably three or four times. Yeah. Oh, so it was very good. But so let's go back to your wife. So, um and the tea. Right, right. The English tea. I'm sorry. The afternoon tea. Right, right. So she's she's clearly very experienced in that tradition. Because it's not just, oh, this is a tea that you drink. It is a it is a tradition, the the whole process, I guess, right? And what you eat with the tea and so on and so forth. How did she rate? I mean, this could be dangerous if they're listening, but how how did she evaluate it? Like what was her feedback? She thought that it was really, really good. They nailed it. They nailed it.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. So one of the things that I guess may be difference, uh, maybe a little bit of a difference from what she had experienced um in London. Well, outside of London in England, um, was she remembers um that there was much more of a um like the typical fare, like your cucumber sandwiches and that kind of stuff. It was a little bit they were good. Yeah. So um she had more of uh I if I remember correctly what she had said, it was maybe less of a variety of things, but more of the standard things, like the cucumber sandwiches and some of the other little hors derby things. Okay, but um, she thought that it was excellent. I mean the stuff that we had, you know, um was really, really good. The teas that we had, um, I probably had the best tea. Um, not that I had any prior knowledge of what I should or shouldn't have, but out of the ones that we had. But it was the best tasting one. Yeah, it was I thought so. Yeah. Um and my my wife seemed to think that, you know, um that maybe my daughter's was was better. Um I would agree with your wife. Yeah, because I had the same that your daughter had you're a smarter person than I am. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

No, that's I'm just always agree with the wife. I'm gonna give your daughter credit for her choice because that's the one I had. I don't Oh, that's right. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I liked it. Yeah. Now, this is coming from my my deep and wide experience in tea drinking, and which is which is pretty shallow, okay, and very narrow. Very, okay. So um, but I also I mean I'm I feel compelled to say there's a list of things that I thought I would be talking about on my podcast at different points. And afternoon tea, it wasn't on the list. Yeah, you didn't think that that was time you talked about right now. And I'm enjoying it right now. Right meow? Yeah. So all right, are we good with the tea though? Totally good. All right, it was a good experience. And it was Mother's Day, and we were all we were all happy. I missed the meow. All right. So I I totally, you guys, I'm so focused on the tea. I'm into it.

SPEAKER_01

There was actually four of them in there if you were if you were to go back together.

SPEAKER_00

I didn't hear a single one.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, no, it's totally fine.

SPEAKER_00

I was prepared. I was authentically focused on the split them in there, you know. All right, well. Okay, so let's let's move on from the tea. Right. Let's talk about how we are connected. Okay.

SPEAKER_01

Why don't you why don't you Yeah, so um sort of COVID-ish, post-COVID-ish, whatever. Um there's a a Facebook group for our area that has to do with uh drinking local and all that kind of stuff. Um and we had met on there. Um weren't really actively communicating too much with each other, but you know, kind of keeping up, keeping up every every now and then. And um I happened to see that you were doing some cocktail videos and some other things online, um, and kind of you know, sharing them on there. And then I started seeing this uh, you know, this this other like podcasty thing that you had going on, and uh was quite intrigued. So I help out a lot with uh with other online uh videos and some other things that are uh part of what I do for work and some other stuff that I do in a side. Um, and I you know decided that it could be a cool thing to help. And since you are, you know, a little bit of a stretch, but effectively my neighbor, you know, on a different street. We're a couple streets out, yeah, yeah, yeah. But we're we're we're we're in a neighborhood. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So I I thought that I would be helpful if at all possible.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

So uh we've been doing uh I've been kind of working a little bit behind the scenes, doing some of the editing and filming and whatever. So I think it's been working out pretty good. And it's definitely something that I can get behind.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

So um one of the things that really kind of drew me to the whole shut up and love your neighbor thing is the ideas that I've had through my upbringing and through other stuff. So like my mother, uh, when I was growing up, was really big with, you know, having me understand that, you know what, it's not just about me. Like, for instance, if we go out to eat at a restaurant, um, it's important to understand that there's, you know, a waiter, a waitress, a server, a cleaner, person, whatever, um, that's gonna be coming up and cleaning up after you. So, you know, there's things, especially at a busy restaurant or something else, um, to sort of make sure that, you know, we kind of do our part to help out, even if even if it's just a really small thing. But, you know, being able to sort of take your silverware and kind of stack the plates and all that so that, you know, the server person or whoever's gonna be cleaning up after you can sort of come and quickly grab that stuff, get it out of the way, wash it on the table, do whatever you got to do to allow for those other people, the next people that are standing in line to have a spot to be able to sit down. So it was things like that as I was growing up, that it was, you know, hey, you should understand that whoever the next person is that's either coming in after you or um, you know, the the next person has to touch something or do something, um, you know, have a mind out for what what their experience is going to be, you know. So clean up after yourself and and try and, you know, make a good impression or or do something that is um, you know, maybe just that little bit more um time save for the next person. If I if it's really not much out of my way, and maybe after a meal I'm still sitting there and you know, maybe I'm finishing a drink or whatever the case may be, you know, just take that extra few moments just to be able to kind of help tidy up because it makes a big difference. And I, you know, I can't even tell you how many times, you know, I just do that instinctually.

SPEAKER_00

Right.

SPEAKER_01

And uh I always end up getting people that are like, wow, thank you very much. That made a big difference. So it's it's things like that.

SPEAKER_00

So let's drill down on that. So because I I've I've had conversations even prior to Shut Up and Love Your Neighbor about those types of behaviors that you're describing and and similar ones. And I've actually heard pushback along the lines of, well, that's what they get paid to do. But as I but as I heard you kind of kind of walk through that whole thing, towards the end there, you talked about impact, like how that impacts the person. It's not even so much, and correct me if I'm wrong, it's not even so much about the work. It's not that you're trying to do their job so much as it's it's a positive impact. It is a gesture of appreciation, of recognition of their hard work and saying, appreciate everything you're doing. Let me help with this one small thing to acknowledge that.

SPEAKER_01

Is that is that absolutely you know, I'm I'm I'm a firm believer, especially in like my professional work and what I do. Um, you know, there's an appreciation for like, hey, you know, I've been in the trenches with this person, I understand what they're going through, or I understand what the job is. I understand that it's uh, you know, it's a drab. It's you do you do what you got to do. Um and sometimes it's just those little tiny gestures that make a big difference. It's like I'm acknowledging you. I I see you, I know you. And and I think on one of your previous episodes, you know, your guest was talking about that people want to be seen and known. Right. Um and and it's something that, you know, I've always kind of lived with, you know, it was one of those things that my mother had sort of instilled with me in a very early age. And, you know, I might have been a little atypical. I wasn't always uh, you know, maybe trying to play with the kids so much, you know, I would end up staying by the adults because quite frankly, some of the kids were kind of annoying and you know, they're you know, everybody's screaming and yelling and hooting and hollering, whatever. Yeah. And um, you know, I just I don't know, I never really was about screaming around. So for me, having an understanding that you're helping that next person and maybe giving them just a little bit of a breather in a in a hectic day. And again, you know, you never really know what somebody's going through.

SPEAKER_00

Right.

SPEAKER_01

Um, and if it's one of those things where you can just sort of offload a little bit of that, you know, uh a little bit of that humdrum of a normal day for somebody where they're just like, oh my god, I'm just cleaning up everybody's stuff, and it's just so ridiculous. Yeah. Um, I think the big thing is that if we can have the takeaway to try and help people, you know, with just that little bit, something that that doesn't really cost us much, right? But can be a big help to them. Yeah. Especially if they're really busy, you know, if a restaurant's really hopping, you know, and they've got a million people standing out trying to get, you know, trying to get a seat, just those one little things that can just kind of make a big difference. And you end up getting told, you know, a lot of times where um, you know, thank you, thank you very much. Right. You know, that one little thing, it really helps a lot.

SPEAKER_00

It it is huge. Um, and you talk about, you know, that one little thing, and it's it's just a small thing, and so on and so forth. But one of the things that has struck me as we've gotten to know each other, is you reaching out on an effort like this, um and sort of inserting yourself with your your skills and um you know willingness to to do the work, you've put hours in that's not a small thing. That's not the same as at a restaurant. What you know, because you you could you could have just watched you know, you could have been a spectator, could have right? And that is a cultural um characteristic or you know, uh maybe not symptom, but that's really what we're trying to to break through is to get people from being a spectator and actually getting involved and proactively loving their neighbor. Um and so when you reached out, I I think what struck me was that the act itself was literally, literally living out the very thing we were talking about. So I I was just totally blown away by it. But my point being, it's not a small lift. So what's behind that for you?

SPEAKER_01

So I've always been the type of person that is going to give somebody benefit of doubt. You know, um, I've done it many, many times in my life with just almost everything, you know, helping people move, which is you know, one of the things that people talk about is the worst ever. And after you turn 40, you just shouldn't do it. It's my policy. But go ahead.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Um, but I I help people a lot. And you know, I always think of it like this thing. And it's not really like uh like social currency, but that's kind of some way that people think about it. It's like, hey, if I do a favor for you, you're gonna owe me a favor. Um not that I necessarily think it that way, but I, you know, it's one of those things like, you know, I'm willing to extend that olive branch to somebody first. Um and whether right, wrong, or indifferent, you know, I might think that my time is, you know, I'll call it less valuable than than some other things in life, although, you know, people do somewhat talk about their, you know, the time being the most valuable thing.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Um, but if I have the ability or the time or you know, the uh the skill or whatever you want to call it, like in this this type of situation here, um I will try and do what I can to help first.

SPEAKER_00

In under You extend the hand first.

SPEAKER_01

I I I extend the hand first because I figure that, you know what, maybe it's somebody that I know really well. Right. Or maybe it's somebody that I just met. Um, if I believe that the person is worth it and that there is uh it's not a huge lift or a huge you know expense in time, or even if it is a big expense in time. I mean, again, I kind of mentally weigh that out and be like, hey, you know, is is this person or is this cause or is this thing worth it? Yeah. Um, and specifically, you know, when you were talking to me about this, and I had, you know, kind of see it on uh seen. Online, um, it's something that absolutely just resonated with my core. It's something that I've always been inclined to do for a very, very, very long time. And I think that, you know, the idea of trying to, you know, sort of talk through some of these different stories and you know, learn from some um some examples of how people are sort of living that life and doing some things and try to get that message out that, hey, this it doesn't need to be a you know a really big thing. You know, it's it's really more important for a bunch of small things to add up to something bigger. Right. You know, so like not like helping somebody move or, you know, whatever, but um doing the smaller things like picking up a plate or you know, trying to consolidate things, or if you're understanding that, hey, there's gonna be somebody else that's coming in here. Like if you go into a bathroom and it's really nasty or something, even if you weren't the cause of that, you know, um, just to sort of help kind of tidy up because I mean, hey, there's gonna be somebody else in here, and maybe it's uh uh an elderly man and he's not gonna be able to do some of these other things, or if if it's something that can help. Um, so I always try and look out for, you know, holding a door for people, you know, the whole chivalry thing, whatever. Um, but I I think it's those little things that can make a big difference, especially if you see somebody, you know, that's maybe struggling or holding a bunch of things, and they you know that they're going towards a door. Instead of just walking out the door and just going amongst your day, that's that's pretty crappy to do. Right. Um, so I always make sure that I'm kind of always looking for that understanding that, hey, you know, this my little bit of effort can can really help somebody. Yeah. And that's just I don't know, it's just how I was raised.

SPEAKER_00

So much of that resonates. It's it's yeah, I I mean, uh, all of it actually resonates. Um we've talked a lot about not just um this aspect uh as far as the acts, if you will, right, of doing whether acts of service or just doing the small things, loving the people who you encounter who come along in your pathway. Um, but you're not new to you know, building and leading community. Right. Right. I mean, you've you've got a history of stepping in and taking charge, leading the way, bringing people together around an interest or you know, hobby, whatever, whatever you want to call it, what are some of the things that you've you've gotten involved in?

SPEAKER_01

Um a bunch of different things. So um if there is something that I happen to be exposed to, um, and somebody else is starting out, and I guess the podcast, I guess, will we say it's kind of a a perfect example. Yeah. Um if there's if there's some way that I can help to sort of pass on the lessons learned that I did the hard way, um, or again, you know, it's these things that for for my time, you know, to try and help out with, you know, hey, I do this instead of this, or, you know, hey, try this thing, this thing works better, you know, because I've had to do it, you know, and it's sometimes, you know, hundreds or even thousands of dollars that I've had to spend and you know, learn a lesson a hard way. Or um I happen to have a really good teacher and I'm sort of passing that kernel knowledge down to somebody else. Um, or if it's again just something that I can sort of just it's not a huge lift on me, or at least I don't sort of mentally calculate it as a huge lift in the time that I try and execute, but you know, trying to help out, you know, helping somebody move, or um, you know, maybe somebody's building an addition on a house or whatever. Um, so the the big thing is is that, you know, really trying to understand what it is that somebody needs in that moment and see if there's something that I can offer to help them. Whether it's just being another helping hand, you know, literally hands to try and lift or carry something, move something, um, or more of a knowledge-based type of a thing where I can help in something that I know something about. And maybe somebody else either, yes, they might know something, but maybe I can help them, or it's just something I can kind of jump in in the moment because they're maybe really busy with something. So it's those types of things that I that I try and work through the most.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. Um, so when you think about, you know, from a DNA perspective, you clearly already have this wiring, right? In other words, this is this has been in you, you mentioned your mom, right?

SPEAKER_01

And so this I think it's more of a learned thing, but this is a DNA, but uh but you've been on a you've been on a journey.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, right. And you know, the shut up and love your neighbor is a way to package the very things you're talking about. It gives it a phrase, it gives it a phrase, right? It puts a label on it, um, it invites others in, um, those sorts of things. How do you see, you know, from what you've seen so far? Well, let me say it this way. So, you know, each of us can, and many of us have done the small acts over the years. We've learned it, right? It's been modeled for us, we're we're trying to do the right things. Um, but sort of in isolation, if you will, um they're effective, but not necessarily um movement oriented, I guess might be the uh maybe the right way to say it. Um how do you see or or what changes for you now that you're kind of like, okay, this is sort of what I've been doing, right? And how I live my life. And it's it's packaged up, it's got this label on it, and there are mechanisms to try and communicate it and invite other people into it. Like, how how does that resonate with you as far as going forward? I mean, you wear the hat, great first step. It's a great hat. It is a great hat. It's a Richardson, that's why. And now I have a mug. And you have a mug. I mean more for me, but you know.

SPEAKER_01

When you're in the neighborhood, what I can do is you definitely should be. Yeah, well, I mean, on my team's calls or whatever else. I can you know, you know, come on. Yeah, let me take a sip of my coffee. Oh, by the way, did you see this? Yes.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. I mean, uh, yeah, what what how how does this enable or or build up what you're already doing? So I think the biggest thing for the movement. Yeah, you know. I'm so hesitant to use that word, and I don't know why, but it just I don't know why.

SPEAKER_01

I I think so it's it's something that we all know that it's it's good for everybody. I mean, it's it's it's really logical. It's a it's a logical thing, right? Um but sometimes people take a little bit of a, you know, need a little bit of a nudge, a little bit of a push. And for me, I think that if if I have a way to sort of drop that hint, and it's that one little nugget of truth, and maybe I'm in a situation, hopefully, where that truth might ring out um maybe a little extra special for somebody in that moment. You know, it's something that everybody's always told or, you know, should know, should be taught. Um, but if it's something that could be a little bit of a push from each and every person that sort of sees, sees the podcast, hears the stories, um, or listens to the podcast, as it were, through microphones. Um, the beautiful thing is is that if it's if it's something that somebody can kind of just eke out to those those around them, you know, going through your everyday life. Um, and let's say, for instance, and I'm gonna throw out some random numbers, maybe, maybe the the average listener is gonna maybe mention this like 10 times, you know, and maybe a couple of them stick to those other people. And then they end up mentioning things like 10 times and a few of them stick, and you end up having this, you know, exponential growth of that message, you know, even if it's just something that sort of gets put onto the world. Um if it's if it's that one time that somebody says something and you end up having somebody that's that's really struggling, and you end up doing what you can to be able to lend a hand during the time when it means the most to somebody. Again, it might be somebody, you know, something that doesn't really take much time or much effort on your part, but can make a really big difference. And I think that those types of interactions really do stick with people. And you know, it's gonna be like, hey, you know that one time where my back was just really messed up, and you know, I gotta get this thing done. And I didn't expect John or Tommy or Bill or Bob or whoever, you know, to kind of come over and lend a hand, but man, I that made all the difference in the world, you know. And I think that those little, those increments of time in somebody's life where something meant more than, you know, just that small act, I think that if they then pass that on, that it's again one of those more, you know, the the things that sort of uh exponentially sort of make that message a little bit more well known in the world and can just make a little bit of a difference. Um because I mean, like you said before, and you know, you never really know what somebody's going through. Um, and maybe you just happen to get somebody on a really bad day, right? And they just really needed that hand or that handout or or whatever. I'm not talking about like a handout like hey, giving somebody a ten dollar bill or a twenty dollar bill from say meow three times on podcasts, but yeah, um you know, whatever the case may be. Um, you know, it's those little things that can sort of really be incrementally helpful in the world overall. And I I think that's the big takeaway that would that you know everybody sort of needs to get out of this is is really not these individual stories. It's more about the, you know, how you instill the not a teaching, but the, you know, sort of passing it forward, if you will. And I think the the passing it forward is is kind of another thing that sort of lends it hand to the shut up and love your neighbor.

SPEAKER_00

100%. 100%. Um you uh you made me think of something that we talked about um well, we didn't talk about, but I asked you uh briefly. You doing okay? You need a little more? No, doing good. Okay. Yeah. Um and I want to see, you know, hopefully you remember. Um I made an observation, and I have a point to make after this, but um, I made an observation about the fact that you know, you kind of jumped in here, you're helping, and we're teaming up, we're doing this, that, and the other, and I have no clue what your politics are, where you land, that kind of stuff. And that is precisely what you said. It doesn't matter. That's what you said, it doesn't matter, and I agree with you. And I had um a conversation with my buddy Shannon, uh, I think it was on uh the anchor episode, and the answer to one of the questions that he asked was I pointed out um that sort of the the the coolest thing so far um in this experience, in in you know what's happening with Shut Up and Love Your Neighbor is the fact that there are people on the far right who have expressed you know excitement or interest or you know applause, whatever it is for what what we're doing, what we're talking about. Sure, sure. And there are people on the far left who have also expressed the very same thing.

SPEAKER_01

Of course, because it has nothing to do with religion, has nothing to do with politics, has nothing to do with you know, maybe what region of the world you come in. I mean, everybody needs help. Right. And the whole thing, like it takes a village, you know, when you're talking about rearing kids or whatever, um, it takes it takes a neighborhood. You know, I mean, um, you know, helping your neighbor with something, your literal next door neighbor with something, if you notice that they're doing something and you know, interactions like, hey, you know what, they might need some help. Um, again, if it's one of those things where it's maybe not a huge lift from you as your as you know to you personally, but it could make a big difference to them, right? Then you really should help your neighbor.

SPEAKER_00

Right.

SPEAKER_01

Um, because again, I mean it's I think the the overall love in the community, you know, love can mean a lot of different things, but I mean it's it's a caring thing, you know, it doesn't have to be, you know, something big, it could be just that little small thing that makes a big difference in the moment. Yeah, I I think that that's we're we're we're we're in a time right now where unfortunately everything is just so kind of flipped on its head. And you know, you talk about some politics stuff, and I mean everybody just kind of sees this huge widening in the middle of you know, between a left and a right stance. But you know what's in the middle is most people is well, I mean it's yeah, I guess, but I mean in the middle is there's need. Right. You know, need is the the universal thing. Everybody needs something, whether you need community, you need assistance, or you need love, or you you need help with something. I I think need is in the middle. I mean, whether you're on the far right, the far left, something's gonna happen and you need a hand. Right. Um, you know, whether it's health issues and maybe something is, you know, you just need a hand with with something because you know you got something going on, and maybe, you know, hey, this this thing that just like crept up. Maybe you've got a I don't know, a water leak or something. And you know what? Like I struggled for three months to end up getting uh a meeting with my doctor, and it's something that you know he's not gonna be here or she is not gonna be available again for like six months. But I got this other thing. Oh my God, like uh can I not just get a break? Right. And you know, either that person reaches out to you and you have a chance to say no. But it feels so good to say yes. Yeah, you know, it's just one of those things.

SPEAKER_00

Oh my gosh, that is wow.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, so I don't know.

SPEAKER_00

It's it's that's a solid ending right there. Like it feels so good to say yes. Um man, yeah, that's so spot on. I agree with you a hundred percent. Um, so you've kind of already answered this question, and this is the question we normally finish with. So I'm gonna ask it anyway. Sure. Um, mainly so I can pour just another splash, sure. Okay, and we can have a successful cheers at the end. Yeah, I'll I'll get a half a splash. I mean a dram if I'm as a dram, it shall be. Dram, as it were. So the parting question is you know, what does shut up and love your neighbor mean to you? I not in action. See Appendix A. Right. I mean, you have covered, I mean, just some incredible stuff.

SPEAKER_01

Um I I think it's just um understanding that in somebody's time of need, that while it might not necessarily you might not think that it means much to you, or it's a very small thing that you can do for somebody, I think that it could mean a great deal to somebody else. So um again, I mean, you know, saying yes to helping somebody when you have a potential opportunity to just go about your business like you normally would and and be a little self-centered. Um it's one of those things where, you know, if it's something that's not a huge deal for you, but may end up being more than that for somebody else, then you should help.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. A hundred percent. You you have provoked me to perhaps even re-evaluate my policy of not helping anyone move over the age of 40. I've I've tried to avoid that mainly for the sake of my back, but but I may question that the next time it comes up and actually jump back in it.

SPEAKER_01

One of those universal things that people describe as like the worst thing possible.

SPEAKER_00

That is the request that never stops coming.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. And it's like the worst for somebody that owns a pickup truck. Right. Because you just get bombarded. Hey, I got this thing, I gotta move. Can you help me? Nope, sorry. Yeah, I'm gonna be golfing that that weekend, whatever weekend it is. You're you're always doing something else.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I'm thinking about a pickup truck. Don't don't do it now. No, don't do it. All right, man. We're gonna have so many more conversations and do so many more things with this. I'm super excited. But as we finish up, we do like to tell everybody shut up and love your neighbor. Cheers. Cheers.