Episode 6: Surrendering to Life

In this episode, Emily discusses some life lessons she has recently learned. Its a journey!

Transcript

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Welcome back to the Energy with Emily podcast. We are reporting to you live from the new flat. I have been here for two months already, but life has been a whirlwind, but we do have some acoustics in this flat, so I apologize for any of the shifting sounds or the echoey sounds, but maybe it'll make you hear me a little more clearly. I hope everyone is doing so well. I have taken a major break from my podcast due to the fact that life has really just been busy, it's been crazy, it's been hectic, it's been beautiful. There have been many shifts in my life, but I want to report on three of my spiritual findings that I have come across in these past couple of months, three themes that have been really, really active for me and that I wanted to share today for you guys. Life is wild, and I think that all of us, you know, during different pockets of our lives, think that we have everything together, everything sorted, that we know the trajectory that our life is gonna go down, and then something might shift or might happen that feels out of our control, and we might just feel like everything has hit the fan, that everything is going haywire. But always, always, always, just like the tower card in our tarot deck, we know that sometimes things need to go wrong before they can go right, sometimes things need to fall apart in order to be rebuilt. Sometimes life does surprise us in order to make us grow stronger and to challenge us and to build us into more resilience. So the first point I wanted to hit on was just what I said, or similar to what I said before, with letting life surprise you and recognizing that sometimes what you think you desire, sometimes what you are manifesting or focusing on is not always what you truly want or what is in deepest alignment with you, right? So Abraham Hicks talks about contrast and how we have different experiences in our lives in order to gain more contrast and more knowledge on what we do and don't want. The more that we refine, refine, refine, the more that we experience, the clearer we can get on our vision, on our true soul's desire, right? On what we really, really do enjoy and what we don't enjoy. Now there's no right or wrong. I believe we have soul blueprints or soul contracts, contracts with different people for lessons or for blessings or for support contracts or blueprints with our lives, with our purpose and the underlying themes. But life is a free-for-all in terms of we each have free will in our reality to create, to manifest, to call something in, to change direction, to choose a new timeline, to start again. We have a lot of creative control within our lives. So it's a co-creation between us and the divine, the higher self, God, universe, source, whatever you want to call it. So with this first point, letting life surprise you because sometimes what you think you want isn't always what you actually want. There are so many things that we can't see behind the scenes. And while I am all for free will and creating our own lives and you know, even trying to create something differently or to shift our perception on something so that something can change. When it comes to soul contract situations or relationships or people, there are different things playing behind the scenes that we might not see, that we might not be aware of. And I really think now the best way to hold a vision on something you desire is to be a little bit broader, because of course, if you want something really badly, like a specific person or a specific job, of course, you can take moves or you can take steps in order to try to manifest that thing, whether it's through action or aligned action, whether it's through affirmation, visualization, scripting, whatever technique you want to use, whether it's tending to your own energy and shifting your self-concept. These are all techniques you can use to shift the reality around you. But sometimes those deeper underlying things that we don't see are uh soul blueprints that other souls are going through on this earth, soul contracts that other people have, other struggles that people are going through that we may not see, you know, something later down the line that we might think is good with a job or with a person, but we might not know that the divine or the thing that we're co-creating with, the part of us that we're co-creating with sees the bigger picture and knows that that's not the most aligned thing. So I really do stand by the fact that yes, manifestation is law of assumption, you can create your reality, but there's always a chance to let go and to let life surprise you a little bit. Number one, this is good because of course it creates less resistance, it creates less desperation over something specific that you may want or something that you're hyper-focusing on instead of kind of leaving yourself detached and magnetic. Detachment just means really focusing on yourself more, calling your energy back and just allowing things to unfold, letting the bridge of events unfold to your destination. But also when you let life surprise you, things will start to show up that you may not even know that you needed things or people or situations that may be like even bigger than you were ever dreaming of, or even better because you just didn't even like entertain that thing before because you weren't aware of it, right? So it's really that divine balance between maintaining clarity on what you want on the dream life on what you desire, but allowing life to surprise you, allowing things to show up in a way that you wouldn't expect, and being open to life, staying open to opportunity, possibility. I really think the way that we can grow the most and expand ourselves the most is also by jumping into new experiences, saying yes to things, like allowing your heart to open, knowing that you have the capacity to heal yourself if you do open your heart and you get hurt, or if you take a wrong turn in your life, you have the capacity to start fresh and to start again. And it's practicing that art of being fearless and courageous within your life. So this is a big lesson I've learned. Basically, I've had, I talked about another episode, like a lot of friendship changes, or not a lot, but a few, um, which is friendship shifts and quite surprising ones. And at the time, you know, I was upset about it, but now I realize maybe in the moment it was not in the highest alignment with my soul's trajectory, you know, and whether things come back around or not, that's okay. But it's about accepting, you know, what happens and accepting the different shifts within relationships. Um, I also even thought that I wanted a romantic relationship that basically fizzled out just because of too much resistance and too much of a backstory, and whether that does come back around in the future, who knows? But it's been this journey of me really realizing like, okay, what do I actually want in a lifestyle, in a partner, in a friendship? Like, what do I really cherish? What do I really want? What are healthy boundaries? So, you know, just an example. Like, I guess I used to think, like, okay, for a friend, I want like a best friend who we can call each other 24-7. We all always have each other's backs, we're always at our beck and call, we're always available to each other. And I realize that's a gorgeous thing, of course, to have really close families and friendships or family relationships and friendships, but it's about also not being codependent and also about building independence and about building stability within yourself and knowing that people have lives and different journeys and different things that they're working on. So being able to balance being independent with having those close relationships and relying on other people. So that's been a big journey for me in terms of a type of friendship I want. And then even with familial relationships, like I love my family so much, but it's about those friendships and that family that you know you can go a couple of months or even like a week without speaking. Maybe you um ask for a little bit of space, but it's like a respectful, boundary-driven relationship, which should be every relationship, including romantic. I also even, for an example, thought I really wanted to, I do desire to build a lot of wealth. I think a lot of us desire luxury, wealth, abundance, you know, that's amazing, that's great, that's beautiful. But I think it's also about realizing that that's great and something you should achieve and work toward or want to achieve. But it's also about the little things. It's about community, it's about people, it's about love, it's about, yes, material gains and whatever, enjoying life. But it's like even when I have gone to recently some of these places that are so expensive and so kind of like bougie and talked about and elite, kind of like, you know, whether it's like a beach club or like a trip or like a specific vacation destination, the people there I don't really want to hang out with, you know. So it's like really, really finding that contrast and having those different experiences to be like, okay, this may be marketed in a specific way to us and what we may desire because we think we need to live that way, but it's really about being true to what you like and what you prefer. So if you do prefer that luxury lifestyle, like of course, go for it. But it's about being like, okay, what do I really cherish here? What are the things that I'm wanting to feel? Like, I want to feel freedom, I want to feel abundance. Sure, you can also want to like enjoy expensive things, like that's completely fine, but it's about really, really being true about what you are desiring. Even with body image, I'll give two more examples. Like body image, you know, everybody is being fed this skinny demic thing again, which is really scary because I've opened up on here like I used to have an ED. I think a lot of women have used to have an eating disorder in whatever like form that may be, whether it's binge eating or anorexia, or sorry if it's a trigger warning, but I think a lot of us have had it because of the media and because of the pressures that have been put on females and society, and it's scary that it's coming back so hard with Ozempic. And of course, if you really need it, I don't think it's bad, but I think that people that are taking it just because they um you know want to are kind of like feeding into this dynamic of an eating disorder. In a sense, it's just so it's a tool to practice like eating less and not giving proper nutrients to your body, so it's quite scary, and I think even with that, it's like okay, you desire to be skinny maybe because you see it online and you see, okay, everybody else is doing it, so I need to be skinny to be accepted. That's what's gonna make me happy. And then you get skinny and you lose the weight, and you realize that you're losing hair and that you feel like shit and you feel really tired all the time, and that you still don't feel fulfilled in yourself. So it's really, really a journey of all these things, whatever you're desiring, health, career, money, relationships, it's all about contrast and really discovering what makes you feel good. And I know it's a challenge because the societal pressures do feel so heavy, but it's about doing things that make you feel good because life is so short. And wouldn't you rather live life for yourself instead of living life for others? Living life to impress others when no one's really even paying attention to what you're doing, everybody is too caught up in you know, like what they want to do and what they're working towards. So it's kind of a crazy, it's crazy world out here. But I a final example I will say is even with a romantic partner, like I was speaking to somebody for a little bit, like it was building up, like I was still getting over another relationship. It's just like all these things were happening, but seeing a lot of signs and synchronicities with this person. I don't know, like if this was an aftermath of something that I was manifesting before. I don't know why we had so many alignments, but we actually didn't meet like for a really long time, and we were talking online for a while, and then I met in person, and I'm like, wait, I don't want this type of individual. Like, I don't, I I want someone who I have more chemistry with, who's more fun, who's more outgoing, who's more like adventurous, da-da-da, like somebody who is just like just just more chem, you know, you really, really can't tell, especially with dating apps. It's like you might talk to somebody online, you need to meet somebody in person. Like, that's why, even like if I date, I'm like, I need to meet you in person because you could have the best conversation, you could have all those things, but it's all about the chemistry, it's all about the energy in person, the connection in person, the pheromones, the way you guys talk to each other, the way you guys laugh. Like, you can curate a text, you can curate a message. It's it's not the same as in person. So it's just a dating side note, but it made me realize, like, oh wait, I kind of want somebody who's like, you know, practices healthy habits in a sense, but also is fun, and somebody that I can go out with, and somebody that I can like be a foodie with, and somebody that I can whatever, just like enjoy life with. And it's it really just I think the more experiences you have, the more that it puts things into perspective, like, okay, I want this, I don't want this, I want this, I don't want this. And I really love that Abraham Hicks contrast theory because it's so true that like until you really, really discover things and go out into the world and have experiences and go on dates or try new jobs or applied for new things, it's like you're never really gonna know what feeds your soul the most. Um, you know, some people might, but I guess for me it's more of a journey of figuring out like what I like and I don't like. Um and it's about setting those boundaries too. So um the second point I wanted to make, I guess piggybacking off of that, is control versus surrender, because I think manifestation is such a fine line between a coach telling you, do your affirmations, do your visualizations, do your self-concept work, do the somatic work, da-da-da, focus on your person, do scripting, focus on the career, like do your whatever other technique you're taught. And then you can control or you can try to control something through those practices that you're actually not practicing the feminine art of surrender, which is a huge part of manifestation. You are putting in the work, you're putting in the aligned action, doing whatever technique you're doing, and then you're pedestalizing the thing that you're manifesting because you're putting so much focus on it that you're trying to control it, that you're becoming too obsessive. So it's an art, and this is what I'm learning. So, literally, like, you know, it's it's it's a journey with this stuff because it's a balance in the masculine and feminine is a balance with putting in the effort and building the structure and then surrendering and releasing and being and receiving. And so when you are just allowing yourself to do the technique, whatever, maybe put it in your routine, like integrate it in your routine, but then allow yourself to have time to just live your life, to just be, to just see what comes in, to allow things to unfold. That is the divine balance, and that's when manifestation works at its peak, because you are, as I said before, letting life surprise you. You are allowing things to come into fruition in a way that you might not expect. You are releasing that control, releasing that resistance, and you're just opening yourself up to life's possibilities. So it's a really divine dance between, yes, you and your higher self, you and the divine, but it's also a divine dance between masculine and feminine, the doing and the being, the output and the input, right? Or the receiving. So it's a fine art that we all need to practice, and I do specifically, but I really believe that if you integrate these practices into your routine, say a few techniques in the morning, at night, maybe do a sleep affirmation track, do your qigong or do some yoga, take a walk, do whatever workout you want to do some somatic work, heal your body, listen to your intuition, and that is when you can master this practice of the feminine, masculine, and balance because you're really going to be like, okay, do I feel like I wanna do these techniques more, do this more healing, or do I feel like I want to just trust and let go a little bit? Do I feel like I need a massage or to do something somatic because my nervous system feels really afraid and my body feels really tight, or do I feel like I just want to kind of like do a workout? Like it's really about listening to your body. And I think that's where we're getting lost to now with our social media age, our information age, because everybody is reporting from their own body, from their own experience, but each body is different. So it's no what no, it's no one size fits all. Like it's never one size fits all. It's all going to be up to you, up to how your body works, about how you know your astrology or your birth chart works, everything, your human design. Like we're all each individual, unique souls that need to discover what works best for us individually. So it's about, I guess, it's what I said in another video and TikTok recently, it's authenticity, being true to who you are authentically, and not trying to be perfect or to fit into a mold or to do something because other people are doing it. And it's also about finding that divine balance between control and surrender and really allowing yourself to do whatever you need to do and then to rest and relax and be in the present moment and enjoy the present moment. And piggybacking off of the last point, I want to talk about how astrology, the more that I go through life and the more that I, you know, work with an app called Channy, you know, and just in general, the more that I'm like diving into my birth chart or my big three, because that's the main I focus on, the more I realize that it's a tool and it's a truth, like there is truth to it. There's no wonder why astrology has been used for literally like since the beginning of time, you know, but it is a tool and it shouldn't be a hindrance. But even this past Mercury retrograde or any eclipse season or anything, I always, always, always, always feel my triggers come up more heavily. I feel like crazy life changes happen, I feel more sensitive, I feel more reflective. So it is about like learning a little bit more astrology too, because the more you do, the more you can kind of like stay ready for these time periods so that you can journal or so you can reflect, or you so you can be more self-aware of what's happening around you and within you, so that you can show up in a new way. So astrology is definitely a tool, but I feel like the more that I go through my journey and my time here on earth, I do believe that astrology is like super real and it shouldn't be used for fear-mongering, it should be used as a tool for our personal expansion and our growth. So as you can see, like even if I I've been on my spiritual journey for nine years, spiritual awakening, and I do feel a lot more grounded this year, but like there's still things that I'm learning, it's still things that I'm practicing. And I listened to a podcast the other day or um a video the other day about anxious detachment, actually, because I'm still, you know, I'm dating and I um am meeting someone or have met somebody new, and I feel like I have been triggered again by anxious attachment because it's really that thing where it's like even if you are with the kindest, most amazing person, like you will still have the same patterns within you show up. And in this video with anxious attachment, like, of course, you know that it's it comes from your childhood, your um caregivers, how they, you know, um treated you during childhood and what you learned during those uh really formative phases of your life. But as I, you know, watch this video, she was talking about how anxious attachment, like, I don't like how people say how to go from anxious to secure or how to heal this forever. It's like, you know, a lot of deeper things might be things that will reoccur or pop back up in our lives to test us, or kind of things that might be still laying dormant in our bodies or in our fascia or in our subconscious, and it's about practicing balancing those things, and it's about observing those things and not reacting, and about responding. It's not about like fully healing something forever and being like, okay, I'm never gonna deal with this again. This is gone forever, I don't want this in my life anymore. It's about really, really gaining clarity on what your triggers are, what your quote unquote weaknesses are, because nothing's a weakness, it's all a strength because they're learning, teaching you how to become a better version of you, but then it's about responding instead of reacting. And so these Mercury retrogrades and these eclipse seasons, like it always might seem like the same patterns might come up for you, and that's because it's really just a practice for you to become better and better and better at facing these things, at facing these wounds. And it's a crazy journey, it really is. But the more that you can create a routine, um, as I've said before, in my energy embodiment coaching or in my activations, I'll do different types of techniques, whether they're somatic or whether they're manifestation techniques, or just create a routine or daily schedule for my client in order to really lock into a routine that will keep you anchored in yourself and grounded and will be able to hold you in any of these more turbulent phases like Mercury retrograde or like you know the eclipse season or anything like that. Um, so yeah, it's it's a crazy ride. But I'm just reporting as I go. As I've said, a few life updates before I leave as well. And thank you so much for everyone who's downloaded and tuned into the podcast. But yeah, I've moved into a new flat living by myself. Um, I do actually love living by myself at the moment because I feel like I can really curate the energy around me in my space. Um, I do hope to move in with a partner one day, but right now, you know, I'm dropping the pressure on myself about being 30 and needing to get married and have kids and da-da-da-da-da. Like all that noise is in a female's ear, of course, when they hit 30, and it's just like I'm gonna just, you know, go with the flow, see how my life goes, and I'm in a very happy place right now. Um, but yeah, moved spaces. Um, I have a lot of exciting travels coming up for work and for uh pleasure, and yeah, I just really feel like I'm in a new chapter of my life, and I feel like now I've just learned to welcome a new chapter when it comes. You can see when the characters start changing around you, you can see when the circumstances start changing around you. Like life will shift, and change is the only constant. So the best thing to do is to go with the flow, allow things to unfold, and trust that everything is in your highest good. So, sending so much love, guys, and connect with me on socials. If you want to work with me and see any event updates or app updates or retreat updates and sending so much love, bye-bye.