Episode 6: Happy Birthday Carson

Phil and Shannon discuss Carson's Birthday, along with Best and Worst Birthday's, along with Songs for Carson.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:37

Happy birthday, Carson.

SPEAKER_06 0:40

Happy birthday, Carson.

SPEAKER_00 0:41

We were supposed to do this uh Sunday. I think before that, even.

SPEAKER_06 0:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 0:48

Do you want to um give a special message to Carson while I look at you? You don't want to say anything special to him? Anything for his birthday?

SPEAKER_06 0:58

I don't know. I get too emotional and I'm not good with words, but yeah. Happy birthday, Carson. I can't believe he's already seven. It's just crazy how fast time went by with that. Um yeah. I'm proud of him. Proud of all the goals he's reached, and you know. Oh, I thought you were mooting me. What are you doing? Um Yeah, I just keep being you and you know to me you're perfect and I wouldn't change anything about you. And I love you.

SPEAKER_00 1:36

That was nice. Yeah, I'm hearing some humming, that's why I turned it down or turned it off, but I would like to say to Carson that if he ever hears this Don't make me cry. I'm not gonna look at you, so just turn away.

SPEAKER_06 1:51

I can still hear you.

SPEAKER_00 1:52

You can hear me, just don't look at me. I want to say to Carson um that uh this podcast is for you. Um why I'm doing it, why we're doing it is for you. It's to learn more about you. Uh you are uh in a way uh a tough challenge, but I don't in no way that's a bad way. Um as a father it's hard to somehow, you know, raise kids, especially when you're new at it. But with Carson, it's tougher because obviously some of the stuff that he goes through you don't understand. I don't understand. Um you go through stuff daily you pain, uh you go through struggles, you go through trying to get your stuff across that people don't understand you. Um and it's hard to obviously see that, and that's what makes it tough. But uh I'm strong for you because you're strong. You are a um you kind of wear everything out there and you don't care what people think, and that gives me strength to not care what people think. So um I'm doing this for you so I can understand more and learn more and help you in the best way possible. Um so with that being said, um, I'm very proud of you because every day and every little thing is a win. And yes, there's setbacks like any other kid, but you're different in a way. Um because I don't know anyone else who goes through what you go through. So um I want to do whatever I can to understand you, to support you, to be here for you, and uh know that with you know my last fighting breath, I'm gonna advocate for you. So I want you to be able to enjoy your life, uh guilt-free, stress-free, um, and find a way to make everything better for you in a way. But you're so tough that it doesn't even bug bother you. So I just want to say that I am proud of you. So happy birthday. I hope you had a great birthday, and I hope it was everything you want it to be. And I'm looking forward to many more. Okay, I'm not gonna look at you now. Is that fine?

SPEAKER_06 4:19

Yeah, that was great.

SPEAKER_00 4:21

Tell me about his give me w what was his best birthday party you think we've had for him? Party? Party.

SPEAKER_06 4:30

Um I don't remember all the parties in like detail, but we had a couple good ones that were at the park when it was him and Nolan's birthday together. Um his first birthday party that he had was actually his second birthday, and that was at you know, the indoor play place. I think that one was pretty good. Um up until the happy birthday song.

SPEAKER_00 4:56

Yeah, I forgot about that.

SPEAKER_06 4:58

That was the first time that we had noticed um him, you know, not enjoying people singing happy birthday to him. He, you know, immediately I was holding him because he was only two, um, immediately like turned away and got scared. He didn't have like a huge like meltdown or anything, but um do you remember him having a meltdown? No, I just said like being being scared and turning away.

SPEAKER_00 5:25

You had like 30 to 45 minutes in each play structure. There was like three big play or two big play structures, and Carson always wanted to go to the one that no one else was in. Yeah, and then he kept running out. There wasn't that many people with us. I think this was like kind of in the midst of COVID still, so I think people were like still worried about hanging out and stuff, and we got kind of scrutinized for having a party, but Carson missed his first birthday because of COVID, so we were damned us be damned we're gonna have a party for him. Maybe that was me. I I wanted to have a party for him so bad. Um, because his first birthday that really got to me that I he didn't have a party. And I just his first birthday, I just made him it made me feel sad that he couldn't celebrate his first birthday.

SPEAKER_06 6:05

Yeah, we planned this big first birthday party for him, and um his birthday is in the beginning of April and mid-March was when you know everything shut down and you couldn't, you know, leave your house basically quarantine.

SPEAKER_00 6:19

Um Yeah, we told your mom and your dad that did not come over and yeah, and you know, they weren't gonna come over either.

SPEAKER_06 6:25

It was a two-hour drive, so they were kind of nervous about being stuck, yeah. Being stuck, and it was all just so new.

SPEAKER_00 6:32

We didn't know California was crazier, so it was uh a little tougher about lockdowns.

SPEAKER_06 6:37

Yeah, very tough on lockdowns.

SPEAKER_00 6:39

So yeah, that was a good party. Um it's funny. I I besides the joint parties, I don't remember too many good ones.

SPEAKER_06 6:48

Um well, I think wasn't his second one his only one like solo birthday party. I think after that we just had joint parties with him and Nolan because their birthdays are 10 days apart. Yeah. Um I wrong, did he have another solo birthday after that?

SPEAKER_00 7:01

He had one this year on Easter.

SPEAKER_06 7:04

Well, yeah, but that wasn't like a party. That was just us.

SPEAKER_00 7:06

The hell it wasn't a party. I had a great time in this party just because you didn't have a but I'm saying, like, we didn't like invite like people. We didn't need to invite him, but I was perfect. It was I was I was turned up for him. I played music, we had food, you had way too much to drink.

SPEAKER_06 7:21

I had way too much to drink, you had way too much drink. You had like way too much fun celebrating Carson and Jesus because it was on Easter that day. Um but yeah, I guess his birthday last year was kind of the same thing. We rented like that combo jumpy that had a water slide. It was too cold, and it was freezing last year, but he was out there having the time of his life. The only difference this year is you know, it landed on Easter.

SPEAKER_00 7:43

So what was his worst birthday party, would you say?

SPEAKER_06 7:47

Um besides the first birthday party where we didn't get to have one, there was that party. I think it was our last birthday party in California. I think it was because I think my mom had to leave to go see my grandpa in the hospital. But, anyways, um it was one where it was raining.

SPEAKER_05 8:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 8:05

And he um we were at the park um that we usually had their birthday parties at. But I mean, we were under like the the tables are under like an overhang, so we weren't getting wet, but obviously the playground and everything, you'd get wet. So he was upset because his Kindle kept getting wet, and so he couldn't watch his video.

SPEAKER_00 8:22

So not only that, but his hands were freezing cold. Yes. He kept touching the ground and he was uh he was going through it. I have a picture of him just like just beat up, and then we brought a sitter to the show.

SPEAKER_06 8:33

Yeah, luckily we had the sitter came, and then so um, you know, he was just not having it, so he actually left early. I drove him back home with the sitter, and then um that sucked.

SPEAKER_00 8:44

He didn't get to celebrate his birthday.

SPEAKER_06 8:45

Yeah, but I think everyone came to the house after, um, or most people did.

SPEAKER_00 8:50

I thought you were gonna say that one birthday we took him out on his birthday, and then you walked down that Dr. Seuss uh Dr. Seuss uh bridge. Is that his birthday? And then he felt he made a big thing.

SPEAKER_06 9:00

Oh, so we took them to like uh storybook land and remember.

SPEAKER_00 9:04

Made him fall.

SPEAKER_06 9:04

I I did not make him fall.

SPEAKER_00 9:06

You pushed him. I have a video of it. You want me to post the video of you pushing him?

SPEAKER_06 9:10

You can't. I didn't push him, but I think I say like, what do I do I say like oh shit or something in there? And I hop down after him. Um there's a funny story with that though. So there was like this little we took him to storybook land, and there was like this little like walkway, like in like a garden, and I don't know what the point of this walkway was. The Dr.

SPEAKER_00 9:27

Seuss walkway.

SPEAKER_06 9:28

I don't think it was Dr. Seuss, but anyway, so it was like you know, winding turns, and it was like a platform, and there was like you know, bushes and like plants around it. And so he would take a turn, and then there would be like a little platform next to her and he'd want to stop and like you know, pound on the ground. And so there was, you know, obviously people behind us, but then there was kids running the opposite direction, and it's a one-way. So I was like, okay, I was trying to just get him to walk through. And uh at one point we took a turn like too sharp, and it was kind of like a decline in the little walkway. And I guess he kind of just fell off the side, and it was like a good, like two-foot drop into the bushes, and he kind of rolled. And I hopped up after him, and I was like, Oh, it's okay, buddy. Like, I don't even think he really cried. But we get through the we get through it, and there is a guy behind me with his like baby, and he comes up to me and he's like, Oh man, he's like, I saw that, I got the whole thing on video. Do you want me to send it to you? And I was like so embarrassed, I was like, Oh no, thank you. But Phil was like, You should have done it, you should have gotten his point of view to like really see what happened.

SPEAKER_00 10:35

It's a badass fall. I'm really proud of him. He actually took it like in the stride case.

SPEAKER_06 10:38

I don't even think he cried at all. I think he was just kind of like shocked, but and he was he was little, he was a little shovered up.

SPEAKER_00 10:44

You didn't even know that you had it, and then like later that night you saw it that you had it, and it was it was great. Yeah, I'll put I'll put that on a table.

SPEAKER_06 10:51

I think that was his second birthday, his actual birthday.

SPEAKER_00 10:54

Because we left we left the house and we like I think we all played hooky that day or something.

SPEAKER_06 10:58

Yeah, maybe.

SPEAKER_00 11:00

That was a good birthday. Yeah, I would say his worst birthday.

SPEAKER_06 11:05

Yeah, besides his first, um I mean, as far as birthdays, I don't really remember his actual birthdays, what we did every year, but I just kind of remembered.

SPEAKER_00 11:13

We always took him somewhere. I think we did we did a boat day one day.

SPEAKER_06 11:16

We did those are always fun, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 11:18

Yeah, he had those okay. Um yeah, his his worst ones are obviously the the ones where he didn't get to be a part of it. Um yeah, so yeah, all those bashes that we had, um we're pretty we're pretty sad because we we always went to this one park. We always got some like uh some guy to cater food, which was awesome, so we didn't have to cook. And then taco guy was fantastic. Um and then we had uh Karsten would always go play in the volleyball pit, and thankfully we rented the park out, so no one really went to the volleyball pit. Yeah. And then uh again, he just he'd have a meltdown a little bit here and there, and it was kind of rough. Um and then we just have to have someone on on him as a body, and it was just tougher.

SPEAKER_06 12:00

Um it's just hard for like hosting parties when especially for me, because you know, I would have to like be with Carson all the time. Um and I have to host and drink, it's like a Phil has to host and socialize and have some beers and I have to have make sure the taco guy's taken care of.

SPEAKER_00 12:18

I have to I have to run the DJ booth. I have to, I have to it's wall-to-wall stress, stress the entire time. I'm on edge.

SPEAKER_06 12:26

I'm running around like a chicken with my head caught off. So am I. You think I'm just I'm hosting.

SPEAKER_00 12:29

I have to host.

SPEAKER_06 12:30

So stressful, so stressful. I have to play games that you have to drink.

SPEAKER_00 12:34

I have to drink the entire time.

SPEAKER_06 12:35

Yeah, but you know, I my mom would step up and she would watch them too, like to kind of let me like socialize a little bit, but it's hard. That's why that year that we brought the babysitter, I was like, okay, cool, we have a sitter, like I could host, I could talk to everybody, I could, you know.

SPEAKER_00 12:49

Then monsoon fulsom hit.

SPEAKER_06 12:51

Yeah, but there was that one, remember that one year? I think it was the year before that. I think we had their party on like Easter weekend, and so we had that Easter egg hunt.

SPEAKER_00 13:00

Oh, yeah. We had a bunch of kids there.

SPEAKER_06 13:02

And then we had like those special like silver and gold eggs where we had like four of them, and I hid money in each of them. And I think like the one of the gold eggs where I had like a ten dollar bill on there, I think that was the most money I had. We lost it and we couldn't find it. And like I even went back to the park like a couple days later to see if I could find it.

SPEAKER_00 13:19

Like it was like, yeah, I was gonna buy it.

SPEAKER_06 13:21

No, but well, maybe it was more than that, maybe it was like 20. But anyway, I mean that's exciting for a kid to find that.

SPEAKER_00 13:26

I put bottle little bottle shots in those. You did not. I did, you didn't surprise if you give it to Uncle Phil or Dad, then basically you get a hundred dollars. That's how I actually played US out. It's a good move. Yeah, what about um what about like going to parties with Carson? Like, do you feel like obviously we always we learned early on to kind of pick our battles about that? We used to try and always accommodate, and I think it came to one point. What was the party would you remember where we basically said no more? I'm not gonna keep going to parties where like you're have to like disappear or you know, I have to disappear. I mean, the one we went to a pool party one time, and then I took Carson on a drive for like an hour and a half, and it was my friend's pool party. You know, remember like so what party do you think were like we basically said we're done with these for a while? Um was it that pool party?

SPEAKER_06 14:22

No, I think it was one of our friends' birthday parties. Um where we usually go like every year, and there was this one year where um, you know, they usually have like a jumpy in the backyard and they have like activities for the kids, and we have a lot of kids there usually typically, but for some reason I think it happened two years in a row, and the second year it happened, I was like, okay, I'm not doing this anymore. Um Carson, I don't remember if there was a situation that happened, but Carson was very overstimulated. So he was really heavy into his biting phase and he bit the crap out of my shoulder, like right by like where my shoulder meets my neck, to the point where it was like immediately bruised up and it hurt so bad that I was like, I'm not really like a crier when I get hurt, but like that one hurt so bad. When I get hurt, yeah, no.

SPEAKER_00 15:14

You're that tough, huh?

SPEAKER_06 15:15

But I was like, I don't know if it was because I was embarrassed or what, but I was like crying and I was like, I can't, we can't. This is just I don't know if we could keep come come do these parties anymore.

SPEAKER_00 15:26

Yeah, there there was that one. Um there was a I don't know if it was a birthday party where he he lot we lost him for 30 minutes.

SPEAKER_06 15:34

That wasn't a birthday party. That wasn't my no, my friend was h hosting like a summer kickoff party or whatever. And she had a jumpy. Like uh yeah, she had a jumpy, but then she had like you know, a bunch of our friends with their kids and then some kids from like her son's daycare or whatever. Um yeah, but anyways, uh we were at the party, and for some reason Carson was like playing, but he like wasn't he was kind of whiny and kind of like wanted to go.

SPEAKER_00 16:07

Um too many people, yeah.

SPEAKER_06 16:09

And so I took him into the house and he was in the back in my friend's son's bedroom playing, and I was making him food, and then all of a sudden somebody went to leave the party, and I look over to the door, and the front door was wide open, and I was like, Oh my gosh, where's Carson? Because Carson's in eloper, like he'll just run. So I go in the back room, he's not in there and freaking out. I'm like, okay, I'm starting to look on in the rooms on the hallway. I'm you know, I ran in the backyard and I don't see him. And I asked my friend, like, do you see Carson? She's like, No. And then I ran in the backyard again and I said, I said, Phil, I can't find Carson. I said the front door is open, I don't know where he is. Like, so immediately Phil gets up and we both run outside and we're looking. And she lives on like a cul-de-sac. So we're going down the the cul-de-sac, looking at in everyone's yards. There's a park down there. We go to the park, we're looking. Um, you know, a bunch of people from the party were helping us look. They're looking all through the house. We couldn't find him.

SPEAKER_00 17:05

Um I run all the way down the street. I go to the park.

SPEAKER_06 17:09

People got in their cars and we're driving away, and both of us were thinking, like, yes, he elopes, but he doesn't usually go that far, you know. So we're like, he has to be like close. Like it was a good 30 minutes.

SPEAKER_00 17:18

We were literally right about to call the police, and so I I said, No, I say, let's we have to go to door to door and knock on everyone's door door to door. And so Shannon went one way, I went the other way.

SPEAKER_06 17:29

And the second house, I find him behind the car plain in dirt, not answering his name by the person's front door, which is like you can't see it from the street.

SPEAKER_00 17:38

You can't see it, he wasn't responding to it, but he was that close. But I mean, I was I mean, I was accusing people at the party, like who took my son? I I was going crazy, um, as anyone would, because you didn't know everyone there. And I, you know, again, of course, when you're when a son leaves and you know he's non-verbal, it just turns into a complete panic. And it didn't set in until we started going door to door, or before even before that, I was I didn't hit me in like how bad it was until 15, 20 minutes in, and that's when I like just sheer panic was going through my head. Um, but again, I had the wherewithal leads to say that we gotta go door to door, and then thankfully he was that he was right there, and he I picked him up, and I remember just like that weight of just like, oh my god, thank God he's okay. Um and it was no fault to anyone at the party, it was no fault to the host. It was, you know, we were actually joking about a lock before the before it all happened.

SPEAKER_06 18:30

No, what happened was she had had these child safety locks that she had ordered and they had come that day, but she didn't install them on her front door. And so she was like so upset, like I should have done it, made time to do it. And you know, it's it's you know, it's a freak accident, it's no one's fault. But yeah, that was definitely the scariest experience of my entire life.

SPEAKER_00 18:50

That was one of the yeah, that was one of the times of when I said, Okay, well, we should be careful about when we go to places now uh or go up go to people's houses. Yeah. And we did, we came back and everything was fine. Um, and we had a good night and everything, but yeah, it was it took me a while to calm down. Um, and Shannon too, and I I mean I was frantic for a while. Like I just, you know, I had to start drinking again. It was wild.

SPEAKER_06 19:12

So yeah, you know, yeah, started calming it back, you know.

SPEAKER_00 19:15

It was tough. Um so yeah, even even now, it's like it turns into parties, and then it kind of makes you like get scared of going to people's houses, and even houses you trust, it's like it it's a constant um it's stress. It's the everyone, even you go to people's house you love and trust, and who are so welcoming for it. I mean, we were just talking about that this week, and how how no matter who you trust and who it is, you still have to always constantly, you know, keep an eye and do stuff, hover, yeah, turn the water off, uh you know, make sure he doesn't get into stuff. He Carson is the notorious for getting into the one thing he can't get into. So I think with that, it's like it's so difficult to even try and go places with with to someone's house.

SPEAKER_06 20:00

It's hard to relax and have a good time because you know, they're so worried about what can he break, what can he get into? Um yeah. Can you escape?

SPEAKER_00 20:10

We're the kind we're also the kind of people that we don't like to take advantage of people who are being nice to us. Um, not saying that people do, but like some e because even if you like know the person, people will just kind of just sit back and we we I mean, I especially now we overwatch our kids. I mean, even no one, I know when he's gonna be 10 next week, and I still over, like whoever he is, what's going on? What are you doing? What's it you know, I bug him all the time, and so maybe that's kind of a uh overworry because of all the stuff, but it really just comes down to the these parties and people's houses and stuff like that. It's so much better to be home, and I'm glad that like even now we try and do weekend stuff and really get out of the house and do different stuff. Like we did that tough nutter thing. Did we talk about that last time? Did we do that? Was that the last time?

SPEAKER_06 20:55

We did a giant inflatable uh I don't think we talked about it.

SPEAKER_00 20:59

The last time we did this was the interview with so we went to yeah, I went to it was it was before Easter. Um I saw this, I saw this big giant, like it's like a mile-long inflatable, like like obstacle course, and I was like, and I think I told Shannon we were gonna go to the zoo, and I was like, you know what?

SPEAKER_06 21:18

I was excited for the zoo.

SPEAKER_00 21:20

Well, we've been to the zoo, and the zoo here. The zoo, well, right, but the zoo just equals Carson and the cart. I said, you know what? Let's just really go for it. It was Sunday. I didn't drink the night before, so let's just go out and have some fun. And I thought, like, all four of us were gonna go through it. So worst case scenario we get there, it's gonna suck.

SPEAKER_06 21:36

So by the way, it wasn't a mile long. That's a huge exaggeration.

SPEAKER_00 21:40

How long was it then? It was like three or four different like it wasn't a mile long. I think it was a mile long.

SPEAKER_06 21:45

No, I think that's a gross exaggeration.

SPEAKER_00 21:48

Exaggeration.

SPEAKER_06 21:49

Exaggeration, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:50

Okay.

SPEAKER_06 21:50

My lip got sucked in my tooth right there.

SPEAKER_00 21:52

Well, it was very big, and so I went in there with so I made Shannon and Nolan go through for like get ahead of us first. And then I was behind with Carson and Carson just whipped through that thing like he like a madman. And it was so cool to see. Like he actually was pretty good at the whole time. And then I went through like four times by myself easily.

SPEAKER_06 22:13

Um Yeah, with no problems over there. No, Phil did dipped out the first round. Like you got maybe three quarters of the way through.

SPEAKER_00 22:20

I'm too big to be doing that stuff.

SPEAKER_06 22:21

There's a lot of climbing, a lot of crawling under stuff. I just didn't do the inflatable, so it's like hard to walk through.

SPEAKER_00 22:29

I didn't do the last leg of it. I just there was an exit, so I hopped around to go over there and I just got the cart to catch Carson.

SPEAKER_06 22:34

And he was walking on the outside and he's like, Oh, you know, you guys need you can take your time. We have like two hours to do this. I was like, What do you mean, me and no one could take our time? We're trying to keep up with Carson. He's the one that's zipping through this.

SPEAKER_00 22:44

He loved it. And then he it was like 85 degrees too. So then like he went through, he got mad because he wanted to go back in. So we let him go back in, and then he shoots through it like almost again.

SPEAKER_06 22:54

And then uh what happened was he he went out like a s he went out like a side exit, like and I was stuck in the middle on the outside, so I had to run all the way around the other side to try to catch him. And that by that time, there was also this like big, huge, like 14-foot inflatable like slide. There was like three slides, and uh he was trying to climb up the slide, and like the worker was like trying to show him the stairs, and so he eventually went up the stairs. Yeah, so get a live door. So I'm standing there and I'm bent down. I'm like, is he really gonna go down these slides? Cause they're steep. And so I was like looking to see where he was, and he was at the top of the slide. And so I was like, okay, well, I guess I have to climb up after him. But by the time I went to the stairs, he was already coming down because he was like, F this, this slide is too steep for me. And then yeah, and then I was still out of breath. So I was put him in the wagon and I was like, Can you just give me a minute to catch my breath and then I'll go through with you again? And then we tried to go through the third time, and then that's where he was. I think it was just too much. He was trying to like lay on this, like there was a section where it was like you you go climb on a platform and you jump from ball to ball to ball. I mean, you don't have to, you can walk like American gladiator, yeah. But he wanted to lay on one of the balls because he was getting like tired, but there was like three bigger kids and an ad and a dad, like trying to do the obstacle course. So I was like, okay, pull them off. I said, You gotta wait your turn, and then you can lay on the ball. And then uh then those kids went through, and then he laid on the ball, and then more kids came through, and I was like, and he was just not having it. He was having a meltdown and trying to go back to the ball again, the one place that he's not supposed to be. Not that he can't do that, but there's just like a line. Um, and so there was thankfully there was an exit. So we got out of there, and then I think we were done after that.

SPEAKER_00 24:35

Yeah, we were there for about 25 minutes of our two-hour session, which again to me, I looked at it like a win because it was it. We went through it enough. I mean, I wasn't gonna go through that more than once. No one, no one was gassed after the second time. He went through it twice, and he's like, He you could look at his face, he's like, No, I'm done with that. That's too much.

SPEAKER_06 24:50

Yeah, he was sprinting through it with me trying to keep up with Carson. Like, we were trying to do like a oh, you go in front of Carson, I'll go behind him, but he was going so fast.

SPEAKER_00 24:59

That only works when I do it.

SPEAKER_06 25:00

No, he was going so fast that we were both behind him, and like, whatever. So no one was like, I was like, dude, just take your time, I'll just run after him. So we don't both need to be under there.

SPEAKER_00 25:10

Yeah, because I know how to do this. Get law's dorks, I can do this myself. And he was just climbing up the stuff by himself, and he loved it. It was pretty cool. I wish I wish I could rent that for his birthday because he would I mean he he was so overstimulated of that.

SPEAKER_06 25:22

Like it was I wish I could rent it too. That'd be my cardio for like the year.

SPEAKER_00 25:26

And then there was a giant slide he tried to run up there, and then he got scared and didn't go down the slide. And then, but thankfully again, there wasn't there was no line, it wasn't that crowded. I think again, I I hit a home run.

SPEAKER_06 25:34

Yeah, I'm surprised that it wasn't crowded at all, but um, I think it was the last day, too.

SPEAKER_00 25:38

So the last day and it cost money, and I think people didn't want to do it on a Sunday. But and then so I sent Shannon and and Carson to go to the truck, and then I got of course I was getting waters, and then no one wanted an IC, so I got him an IC, and then Carson wouldn't get in the truck until he saw me and Nolan.

SPEAKER_06 25:54

Carson has this new thing where now we can't we have to all leave a place together. Usually we would like I would go put Carson in the car, and they'd you know, they'd be finishing up what they were doing, or in this case getting waters, and that'd be fine. But Carson didn't want to get in the truck until he saw them. So I was just waiting in the shade and I said, Hey, I was like, here they come, let's get in the truck. Yeah, and then we all went together.

SPEAKER_00 26:19

And he had a kind of like he was just kind of like moaning and whining back there, and then we I'm like, let's just take him for a drive. And we took him for a drive, and I dro I drove kind of close to his school, and then he got mad that he thought he had to go to school, and uh, but then it turned into be and we got him some sand and he had a he had a good day. It was a it was a good turnout to be an end of a good day. So I like stuff like that. We're gonna have to do more stuff outside, and and it helps to go to people's houses because he's not pushing the boundaries of what we feel comfortable with. I don't mind you know, people blowing whistles at him and stuff like that. That's I can live with that, but I destroying people's houses and stuff and parties, it's just it's tougher for us. So bear with us over these years, you know. That's why we moved, so we have to do parties. That's the whole reason why we moved.

SPEAKER_06 27:02

Yeah, and then now he's in he's in that stage where he doesn't want to wear clothes, so it's like we're going to other people's houses. I don't want to wear clothes, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 27:09

And he but he just he's tougher than I am.

SPEAKER_06 27:11

No, it's fine here, but like, you know, at other people's houses, maybe not.

SPEAKER_00 27:14

Well it's not fun here, because we have people that come over and he just coming out just balls out, just doesn't care. So I don't know. He's just hanging out, he's just doing him thing. It's just he feels more comfortable. Plus, we're potty training too, so that's just going through that. So that's a whole nother uh debate, debacle. But progress. I don't know. A lot of progress, I think. And he's had I'd say these last year year and a half, two years. Two years? Year and a half, how long have we been here? Year and four months?

SPEAKER_06 27:45

Yeah, not even a year and a half, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 27:47

I think he's made the most progress he's ever made. Yeah. I feel like he's like he's like he's getting through the stages and he's he's doing so well.

SPEAKER_06 27:57

Um Yeah, I think that Mert helped a lot. I feel like he finally got like a good ABA center with a good team. Um maybe just him getting older too.

SPEAKER_00 28:10

Maybe, but he doesn't seem so stressed out. I mean you as his mom stress him out, but that you're supposed to do that, I guess. You stress out in all, and it's that's part of the life, right?

SPEAKER_06 28:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 28:19

I'm supposed to be the police officer, so I'm the asshole, and then you have to stress him out. That's how mothers and fathers work.

SPEAKER_06 28:25

Okay, do you say so?

SPEAKER_00 28:26

I I say so. I can record it if you want.

SPEAKER_06 28:29

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 28:30

Put up a poll. Alright, let's uh let's end it with something positive so that we don't just talk about the negative stuff, because I feel like we went through parties and stuff. I just wanted to do something special for Carson. So Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 28:41

I thought like we did do positive stuff.

SPEAKER_00 28:44

There and here and there. What about uh what about um songs for Carson? Any songs that make you think of Carson?

SPEAKER_06 28:54

I feel like you'd be better at this than I am because your brain your brain is a you is musical like that. Like you agree.

SPEAKER_00 29:00

My brain's musical.

SPEAKER_06 29:01

Well but you think of like when you think of a song, you're like, oh, it reminds me of this, or um I don't know. I feel like there's always a soundtrack going on in your brain. Mine's not necessarily like that.

SPEAKER_00 29:12

But I will say that I'm kind of offended by that actually.

SPEAKER_06 29:15

Why is that offensive?

SPEAKER_00 29:16

I am.

SPEAKER_06 29:18

Okay, whatever. Anyways, um What are you playing?

SPEAKER_00 29:24

Nothing. Keep talking, but I'm trying to figure something up. I'll tell you in a second.

SPEAKER_06 29:28

Well, obviously his baby bum songs. There's one song in particular that I play every morning when we go to school at ABA. It's the color train song. Yes, Jamie. We play that every morning. That's our routine. And it's funny because even this.

SPEAKER_00 29:41

You play it on the way to ABA?

SPEAKER_06 29:43

Yes, every day.

SPEAKER_00 29:44

Why do you do that in the car?

SPEAKER_06 29:45

Because it's our daily routine.

SPEAKER_00 29:46

He doesn't he likes MM. He doesn't like listening to baby bum.

SPEAKER_06 29:49

Oh stop, okay, that's okay. It's just in the morning. And it's funny because one of his RBTs this week was like, Oh, you're so like, what'd you say? You're so brave for listening to baby bum in the car. And I was like, Trust me, I said it's only on the way to ABA every day. I said, not at any other time. At any other time we listen to other stuff, but on the way to school, that's our daily routine. But yeah, and then um there's that, I don't know what song it is, you will, but that game song that you have that video.

SPEAKER_00 30:18

The game. Oh, money from the game? Yeah, where he was like a highly offensive song, by the way.

SPEAKER_06 30:24

Well, he was in the car with you, listening to your stuff.

SPEAKER_00 30:27

Dad and son can groove. Okay, please go.

SPEAKER_06 30:30

The reason it reminds me of him is because you have that video where you're playing it and he was like vibing, and then you stopped, he paused it, and then he went, uh-uh, for you to start playing it again. Yeah. And whenever you play MM in the car, he always vibes too.

SPEAKER_00 30:43

That that Sunday after the the tough nutter, actually, he when you went into the to the to the sand, um he I waited in the truck and he was kind of like wasn't feeling it. I actually put on MM and he's he was actually pretty calm after that.

SPEAKER_06 30:56

Yeah, I don't know what it is. Maybe it's the fast rap. Maybe he thinks we're all talking too slow and he likes that.

SPEAKER_00 31:00

That's how I talk. I talk fast, I think fast. You know?

SPEAKER_06 31:04

I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 31:05

So baby bum game and MM are the songs that make you think of Carson?

SPEAKER_06 31:10

Mm-hmm. That's all I can come up with right now. There I felt like I thought of another one, but there was a song that I was playing in the car one day, and he was like super into it, and I think it stopped and he wanted me to play it again, and I can't even remember what it was. Even I know you you asked me about this like a week ago when we were supposed to do this podcast, but I couldn't think of it.

SPEAKER_00 31:28

When was this?

SPEAKER_06 31:29

I don't know, like a couple weeks ago when we were in the car. I was listening to something that I usually don't listen to.

SPEAKER_00 31:35

Like reggae or something?

SPEAKER_06 31:38

I don't ever listen to reggae.

SPEAKER_00 31:40

So that's yeah, so what we I don't know.

SPEAKER_06 31:42

I said I don't remember, but I was trying to think of it this whole time and I can't think of it.

SPEAKER_00 31:46

Was it a song from like my playlist that maybe he thought like it was me in my truck?

SPEAKER_06 31:50

I don't think so. I don't think so.

SPEAKER_00 31:52

Thrice Sunday.

SPEAKER_06 31:54

Thrice Fridays, thrice Sundays, it's gonna go. No, now you're on your your like beach country.

SPEAKER_00 32:03

I'm all I'm over the board. I like it.

SPEAKER_06 32:05

Oh no, it's not Kenny Chesney, but I'm all over the board right now.

SPEAKER_00 32:08

I'm just living the dream. Why can't I just enjoy myself? I have I have flavors of the week. So then yeah.

SPEAKER_06 32:13

Well, do you have specific songs that remind you of Carson?

SPEAKER_00 32:15

Well, what I did, I don't think I ever played. I yeah, I I will, and I'll get I'll get to that in a second. But what I did was so I know we talked about like the music that uh James did for the podcast again. Thank you, James.

SPEAKER_05 32:27

Thank you, Jane.

SPEAKER_00 32:28

Um I did something in the studio that we took. Do you remember when Carson went to Reno and he was banging on the piano?

SPEAKER_06 32:36

Yeah. So wait, can we tell that story real quick?

SPEAKER_00 32:39

Please go ahead.

SPEAKER_06 32:39

Okay, so we went to uh Reno, we had we have friends that live out there, and it was like a two-hour drive for us, but we decided to do like an Airbnb make like a weekend of it, a long weekend. And in the Airbnb, they had a piano in the dining room. And Carson, you know, as far as I know, he'd never seen like a piano, maybe like a little baby one or something, but quick side story though, he watches that show Chip and Potato, and that she plays piano in the like one of the episodes.

SPEAKER_00 33:03

So go ahead, please.

SPEAKER_06 33:03

So, anyways, he just randomly like got up there, sat on the bench, and started like playing the piano, like with both hands, and then he'd even like put his hand out to reach the keys over there. And I I think I took the video of it.

SPEAKER_00 33:21

One of us did.

SPEAKER_06 33:22

Yeah, because it it looked like so intentional, like he knew what he was doing, and it was the coolest thing I've ever seen.

SPEAKER_00 33:29

So I took that and I sampled it to the to James's song for this power.

SPEAKER_06 33:35

I've never heard this, by the way.

SPEAKER_00 33:36

So I'll play.

SPEAKER_06 33:37

We'll get to experience it together.

SPEAKER_00 33:39

And shout out to Phil at uh at the studio because we were getting so stupid with it. Like we were just, he's like, I looked at him like, is this stupid? And he goes, This is crazy. I don't know why you're gonna do this. And we were laughing because you were trying to get like deep with it, and like it was just it turned into some like psychedelic, psycho, psychedelic, crazy stuff. The one that I do, I do use it in the intro, and you you can barely hear it, but it is like it pans left and right, and it sounds like it sounds like a crashing sound. That's what I use it in the intro a lot of times. There's two different versions, so okay that one, but the one that that's way out there, I'll play the one that's way out there just to kind of laugh. Hold on, let me see. See if it see if this is the one. Yeah, this is it.

SPEAKER_06 34:20

Is that Karton?

SPEAKER_00 34:21

Uh-huh. We play like turning like some like guitar effect, and like it was it was kind of a cool. Oh no, actually, when we did I did record just the version of him playing piano, which I'll play that after this in a second.

SPEAKER_06 34:35

Okay, cool.

SPEAKER_00 34:36

But yeah, that was it was so wild of like there's another, I think there's another version too. We did like four or five different versions and we were like laughing about it, and I was like, dude, I can't like use this. We just ruined the whole song of what we were doing.

SPEAKER_06 34:47

Yeah. Good idea though.

SPEAKER_00 34:49

Trying to use I just it's just because it's like so off-key, but it's it just works so much. I'm like, we can tune it and auto-tune it and crazy stuff like that. Let's fast forward. Yeah, this is it.

unknown 35:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 35:17

That's all Carson.

SPEAKER_06 35:21

I mean, obviously it doesn't sound good, but the video, if you see the way that he's playing the piano with his hands, the way they're moving, you're like he knows what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_00 35:30

I took a picture of it. The picture of one of the Carson voices pictures is him doing it. Yeah, but it's like a cat's running the piano.

SPEAKER_06 35:40

Yeah. It was just it was a cool moment though.

SPEAKER_00 35:44

That was him breathing, by the way. Yeah. So I did that. No, that's all of us breathing. Um, yeah, I'll play the on the outro. You can kind of hear it. I'll I'll play that as the outro. Um, the songs that mean the most to me for Carson, there's three of them. Uh, if you've you might have, if you know me, you've already heard these stories. Um there's three really important songs for Carson that always that always re now remind me of Carson. Um the first one um is a song from the Foo Fighters, uh, minus the infidelity. Uh Times Like These, the acoustic version that I used for a video that I made for him on his first birthday. This is like one of the first, like I made I make videos for the boys every five years, so actually no one's due for one. Um, but I made one for Carson on his first birthday, and I it the song just fits so perfectly. It was a just a perfect uh thing, and yeah, this is a big one for me that actually like the the lyrics hit home really well. Uh when we were like obviously stuck with COVID and uh I don't know. I've heard the song for since like 2002, but now it always reminds you of Carson.

SPEAKER_06 36:57

You cry a little bit? Uh always, yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:00

You trying to watch me cry?

SPEAKER_06 37:02

I'm trying to see you cry a little bit. I can't be the one that's always crying and emotional.

SPEAKER_00 37:06

If you would have gotten me another drink, I would have made me cry.

SPEAKER_03 37:08

I'm a street child. It's time like these learn live again. It's time to like these to give and give again. It's time to live.

SPEAKER_00 37:37

Yeah, great song.

SPEAKER_06 37:38

Can I guess your other song?

SPEAKER_00 37:39

It's if I said if you know me, you know what it is. So it's not, it's nothing, nothing surprising. Okay. Uh the second one is actually when we moved out here.

SPEAKER_05 37:50

Um I know exactly that summer time.

SPEAKER_00 37:53

I remember hearing this for the first time, and it hit so close to home because it was literally just after we moved here. Um, and it's actually ironically, the first vinyl that I bought was this record um from Koeden Cambria, uh, Someone Who Can. And the lyrics, again, it's so perfect. I used it for Carson's Murt video. Um, but the lyrics from the start from the beginning, like this is us uh running out of magic, losing touch. It that like it's like almost describing every little bit and incorporating like how Carson is and how he wants to just be something that you know that he needs to be. It's it's a it's a perfectly written song. Um and it was ironic, this is so funny about music is that I think this is written about his band, so like about him, like them trying to struggle and make it in music.

SPEAKER_06 38:36

So it's it's all about interpretation, really.

SPEAKER_00 38:38

That's what I always say. It's always about interpretation, but like the lyrics hit is so close to home. I think that ironically, when that song came out, I just learned about Mert and I was so excited, and then that song kind of hit me so close to home that I used to like cry in the shower during that song.

SPEAKER_06 40:08

Um I thought of another song that I was gonna share, but I think it might be your third song, so go ahead.

SPEAKER_00 40:13

Yeah, the last one is a newer song that just came out um by Ackland Trio called Surprise, Surprise. Oh, never mind. Um, it's yeah, the lyrics again are very, very fitting. Uh and I'll play the bridge part.

SPEAKER_04 40:27

Surprise, I couldn't sleep last night. Wide awake, staring at the moon. Surprise, surprise, I lost my appetite. My morning starrows for me to sue.

SPEAKER_00 40:49

Yeah, the whole song is is is built very well, um, but it's it's the bridge that gets through the most. It's uh it's the lyrics in the bridge that really kind of hit home to me. Um screwed it up. Yeah, that part right there is pretty bad for me. Um yeah, it's uh it it hits really close to home. It makes you feel as a father, like, yeah, uh I was supposed to be on watch, I sat still and dozed off, I let the monsters rot march right in. Um it just puts a lot of blame on stuff that I shouldn't have blame for, but you always feel blame. So yeah, there you go. Upbeat stuff.

SPEAKER_06 41:55

Very, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 41:56

What was the last other song you wanted to say?

SPEAKER_06 41:58

Well, it doesn't necessarily remind me of Carson, it kind of just reminds me of you know us as a family and good things in life. It's gravy.

SPEAKER_00 42:08

Is it because I'm always hungry?

SPEAKER_06 42:10

No.

SPEAKER_00 42:12

Shout out Tim McGraw. I must put a different version.

SPEAKER_06 42:17

I didn't know there was a different version by UKG.

SPEAKER_00 42:20

That's not the same. Yeah, very wholesome. Call this an epiphany.

SPEAKER_02 42:33

Call this an epiphany, seeing the same things differently. Maybe mama's prayer caught up with me. Starting to get it now. If my window to the world is the evening news only, song I'll sing is gonna be the blues. Maybe happiness is a choice you choose. I'm starting to get it now. Out of flatbed forward and four good tires. Biscuits in the oven, chicken in the fryer.

SPEAKER_00 43:11

It always makes me think about like I don't get a Sunday dinner like that every time. So it's just it's kind of weird that like you Where's my biscuits in the in the in the oven and chicken in the fryer?

SPEAKER_06 43:21

I've honestly never made chicken uh biscuits and gravy and fried chicken in a fryer.

SPEAKER_00 43:26

Do you guys see what I'm putting up with around here? Like, there's no chicken in the fryer. But you know, I didn't do we have a fryer is it we have an air fryer, that's not the same thing, though. You put chicken nuggets in the air fryer. Yes, chicken nuggets in the air fryer. That's how it goes. Same song. I have that I have that album uh signed by the way over there. Great record. Anyway, um yeah, I do want to say again, happy birthday, Carson. Um, I I know it's always weird again, with like, you know, I I think this is the first year that we didn't get you anything. Major for your birthday. I just feel like you didn't really care a lot about your presence, which is really cool of you. I think you get you because obviously every day I feel like it's your birthday, because we always do crazy stuff, and you you get I mean we've we bought and kindles and and iPads and um every little thing that we think that you think of, we always do. So I don't know.

SPEAKER_06 44:21

Every sensory item I have everything.

SPEAKER_00 44:24

So it's like what else you know, but that's the good thing about with with Carson is that he him and Nolan are both the same way in that they don't they don't really ask for a lot of stuff. Um we'll literally take him to Target or like Walmart or a store, and like Carson's like he'll pick out like watermelon, like he's just very simple, and it's it's it's really refreshing sometimes. So Carson, I love you, and happy birthday. And um anything else you want to add to somber this up?

SPEAKER_06 44:52

Happy birthday, bud, love you.

SPEAKER_00 44:54

And I'll play it out with the uh Carson version. So thank you everyone for listening, and thank you for all the new followers and everyone who's there. I'll post videos and pictures and uh cheers and uh oh, really quick, I did we didn't even tell him about the how he hates singing happy birthday. Um but I'll post the video of how he always we do a yearly thing at his school where he gets uh he gets sung happy birthday and he hates it so much.

SPEAKER_06 45:17

So last year was fantastic. It was like when he realized everyone was singing happy birthday to him, he was like, Oh man.

SPEAKER_00 45:23

It's as though he wouldn't realize it, he like he looks up like who's getting sung happy birthday, and he looks and he sees it and he realizes it. The look is like you mother effers. Like, this is too much.

SPEAKER_06 45:32

This year is pretty good too, but last year it was golden.

SPEAKER_00 45:34

Maybe I'll post one of the videos, but you just enjoy it when I post it, and uh just yeah, again, happy birthday, buddy. We love you, and uh love you, bud. Here's many more.