8: When Your Home Reflects Who You Used to Be — Not Who You Are Now

If decluttering still feels heavy even after clearing things out — this episode might be why. Because sometimes the clutter in our homes isn't just stuff. It's an old season we haven't given ourselves permission to leave behind.

This week we're digging into the things that are already there — the bins, the bags, the drawers full of stuff that made sense then but don't quite fit the season anymore. Real stories, real moments, and a few simple questions to help you start to recognize them in your own home.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• Why our homes can quietly hold onto old seasons without us even realizing it
• The hobby phase, the kid stage, the career shift — and how to spot them in your own spaces
• Three simple questions to ask as you move through your home
• Why letting go is often easier than expected
• How creating open space changes our relationship with what comes in
• A sneak peek at our very first guest episode — and we are talking closets!

LINKS + NEXT STEPS:

• Grab the One Space Reset Kit → link below
• Have a topic you want us to cover? Send a DM on Instagram or shoot an email — both linked below. Every single one gets read!

If this episode resonated with you and you’re ready to take the next step, grab the One Space Reset Kit. It’s a short guided reset to help you clear one space at a time — whether that’s a space in your home or one of the open loops we talked about today.

→ Grab the One Space Reset Kit here!

If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow the show so you don’t miss your Monday reset.

Connect with Jackie:

• Instagram: https://instagram.com/makingthespacewithjackie
• Email: hello@jackiepicchi.com

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Disclaimer:

© 2026 Making the Space, LLC. All rights reserved. No part of this podcast may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form without prior written permission.

This podcast is for educational and coaching purposes only and is not a substitute for therapy, medical, or mental health care.

Transcript

0:01

If you've ever opened a bin or a box and felt like you were looking at a completely different person, someone you used to be, but aren't quite anymore, this episode is for you. Because sometimes the clutter in our homes isn't just stuff, it's an old season. We haven't given ourselves permission to leave behind. Welcome back to Making the Space Monday. I am Jackie, a values-based decluttering coach, helping overwhelmed moms make space for what matters most. And around here, that means making space in your home, your head, and your life. So if you caught last week's episode, we talked about over consumption specifically what keeps coming into your home, and one simple question that can help you slow that down. And if you haven't listened yet, I do wanna encourage you to go back and check that one out after this. It was a really good one. I actually realized that I was over consuming in these little sneaky ways that I never really realized, but today we are flipping this. Okay. Instead of looking at what's coming in. We're looking at what's already there, specifically the things that made sense then, but don't quite fit the season anymore. And I wanna start with something from my own 30 day decluttering projects. You guys know I've been doing this little Instagram challenge for myself where I'm filming a reel every day and I'm going into all these nagging spaces in my home that I never seem to get to and decluttering all of them in 10, 15, 20 minutes top. And I've been moving through my home and I keep coming across spaces and bins that are holding onto seasons I've already moved on from, and two of them really stood out to me. The first one was a big old bag of winter and snow clothes that I had shoved under the bed. I've been carrying around these winter clothes and snow clothes in these sealable bags and just keep shoving them under the beds, and I just really have to laugh because we live in an area where there's not a whole lot of snow. I mean, we can get to the snow, but we, we live by the ocean, so the chance of us actually needing a full snow outfit is pretty minimal, if I'm being honest. That bag had been sitting there under my bed, holding onto a version of life that just doesn't seem to match where we are right now So these snow clothes that I found were easily four to five years old and didn't realize I was just carrying around things that honestly nobody would even fit into in our household. That would have been a really funny moment if I just had everybody try on the snow and winter clothes that fit four and five years ago, and we probably all would have had a really great laugh But this bag, it is full of stuff that has been following me around we had moved it between homes and I just thought, well, we wanna go to the snow. We wanna do more of this. It would nice to have, it was so fun when we used to go and do these things and I was really just holding onto this version that just doesn't fit right now. And as I kept moving through the house, I realized the snow clothes weren't a one-off. There was this whole pattern happening. The next one that stopped me was my party decorating bin. And honestly, this one got way more attention on Instagram than I had expected It was a small box, but every holiday, every birthday, all these little celebrations, they really got the full treatment: coordinated colors, decorations, banners, the works. And I really try to be thoughtful about not overconsuming in this area, but I like to make things special, and sometimes I have a tendency to overdo it. I'm talking matching balloons, the banners, paper plates, napkins, all the cute little decorations to make the space look really special. I am definitely a recovering Pinterest decorator over here. I try not to even go and look to see the endless possibilities of things that you can do for parties and celebrations. It can be so overwhelming. Now I go and visit it for just a little bit of inspiration here and there. And that one really gave me a moment in a bittersweet kind of way, because when I was in that season, when my kids were even a little bit younger and I had a little bit more time and energy, just the head space to do this, I really genuinely loved making these very themed celebrations and holidays, and they loved it. It was fun. It's festive, and it really just fit perfectly. We had capacity to do it. And standing there going through that bin, I had to get really honest with myself because as much as I love that season, and I really did, that's not the season we're in right now My kids are a bit older now, and what they actually want is honestly pretty simple. They want us just to be together. No huge elaborate setup. It does not have to be a matching theme, although I know they appreciate it and think it's nice. They just want people and the food and presence, and I'm talking about the P-R-E-S-E-N-C-E kind of presence. Honestly That's what I want too. I find myself drawn to the way birthdays felt in the eighties and nineties, right? You know, I'm a millennial mom over here, so we didn't have Pinterest to give us a gazillion ideas online how to make these very elaborate celebrations. It was very basic, right? Very sweet, rich moments. Cake on the table, everyone squeezed around, nothing had to be coordinated. Everything was just really relaxed. It was so much about just being together in the moment. Now, here's the honest part though, because I'm not gonna pretend I did a whole clean swap and got rid of everything. I'm not fully one version or the other. That's what I'm realizing. I am kind of a blend now. I've pared it way down. I do mini versions nod to the season without doing this huge production, and honestly, that feels way more like me right now than either extreme. I didn't have to go from everything to nothing and be a total minimalist. I just had to get honest about what still fits, right? And that's really what this episode is about because I think a lot of us have a version of that party bin somewhere in our homes. Maybe it doesn't look like mine. Maybe for you it's something like this, okay? It could be the hobby phase. I was definitely there. Craft supplies, guitar, maybe even an exercise bike, bought with a full intention and honestly probably loved for a season. Now mostly just taking up space and maybe making you feel a little guilty every time you walk past it. It might even be the kids-- It might even be the kid stage stuff. This one has an emotional tie, right? The baby gear that you're emotionally not quite ready to release, toddler toys that your kids haven't touched in years, themed room decor that you've completely outgrown. This one's a tough one. I can remember going through some of these toys and things that my kids had over the years when we were going from one very specific phase to the other, You know the things that the kids were just really into, whether it was like special shows that they watched and all the coordinating toys or even dress up clothes, the collections that they had built, all these things. It could be anything, Legos, dolls, I mean, you name it, any of the toys, whatever it is, those hold such special and rich memories. And truthfully, they are so hard to part with and I kind of look back every once in a while and reflect if there was anything that I was sad that we got rid of. And I'll be honest, there are a couple of things I'm like, "Oh man, it would have been nice to save those for the memories." But the truth is, we have the memory of it, and I have plenty of pictures of those things. We don't need the item to remember it. So if I'm being logical about it, we didn't need those things. But sometimes it's nice to save a couple of things here and there. But I see quite often people get stuck with keeping all of it because it's hard to let go. This might even be career stuff. Clothes from a job that you left, books from a path that you decided not to take, supplies from a business idea that never quite happened or that you've closed. It could even be decor or furniture from a different home, a different relationship, a different chapter of your life entirely, or the aspirational purchases. I've gotten caught on this one every once in a while. Things that you bought for the version of you that you were going to become: the organized version, the creative version, the version with more time. And I just wanna say, none of that makes you a failure. None of it. It means you were living. It means you changed. And change is actually the whole point and really a great thing. And here's something I didn't expect when I started this process. It's actually been easier to let go of those things than I thought it would be. I kept waiting for it to feel really hard as I was going through all of these little spaces, and sometimes it does. But a lot of the time, there's just this quiet relief that happens when I'm done recording, I'm done with the project, and I honestly feel really proud. And what's been really interesting is what happens after. I'm creating so much open space in my home, like actual breathing room, you guys. I'm not feeling this urge to fill anything back up. I did one this week where I cleared out an entire drawer in my kitchen, For some brilliant reason. I thought it was a good idea to put all of my table runners and linens and napkins in a drawer. And I think it's, when we moved in, it was the only space I had left. So I literally like shoved all this stuff in there when I opened it up this week. 'cause I knew it needed to be addressed. And the reason why I pulled it out of that jar is that it really needed to go through it, but it was like bursting with stuff. And most of it I have used. One time, maybe two times, and again, holding onto a version of what if that was nice to have for that party that time. And it was just so freeing to be able to get rid of all of these things that no longer fit here and now, and really pair it down to only what was truly special and meaningful and honestly useful. and old version of me would have said, "Oh, what can we put in here? What other collection? What can I make this space be?" And now I'm like, "No way. Let's have an empty drawer in the kitchen." So if you know me or you've been in this cycle before, it's-- this is actually a pretty big deal because so much of the overconsumption we talked about last week starts with that urge to fill every empty space and give it some purpose. But when you clear something that belonged to an old season, the space it leaves behind feels different. It feels intentional, and I am finding I actually really want to protect that. So how do you start to reorganize it in your own home? I wanna give you three simple questions to take with you as you move through your spaces. The first one is, is this still true for me? Not useful in theory, okay? Not something you might need someday. Is it actually true for the life that you're living right now? I want you to think about the season you are in today, right now. And sometimes the answer is going to be partially, and that's okay. Maybe you don't keep the whole bin. Maybe you keep a few pieces that still feel like you and let the rest go. That's what I did with my winter bag. I kept just a handful of things that I felt like could be useful should we go somewhere where there is snow, but I didn't keep the whole collection. Keeping those things, that is not a failure. That's actually really good editing, right? The second question is: Am I keeping this out of guilt or genuine use? Because guilt keeping is real. We hold onto things because releasing them feels like we're saying that season didn't matter, like we're erasing it somehow, and that could be so uncomfy. But I wanna offer you this. Releasing something doesn't erase what it meant. That season happened. It was real, it mattered, and you are allowed to let it go anyway. And the third question, and this one I want you to actually sit with for a second, okay? What would it feel like to only have things in my home that match who I actually am right now? Not who you were five years ago, not who you think you should be, just you right now in this season. What would that feel like to walk through? I've really been thinking about this as I've been reflective. I'm working on a personal project right now, and so part of that is going back through a lot of old photographs, and I'm looking at Jackie five years ago and the space that we held and the things that we had, and maybe even how our values or priorities or what was going on in that season looked a little bit different. And it's absolutely amazing to me to see how far I have evolved and how we have evolved as a family and reprioritized a lot of things and how much less we have and what that actually feels like. I've been feeling the difference. I know what it feels deep inside to now have a bit less, and really, it's a beautiful thing. that version of me, I realized got stuck in some of these over consumption traps that we talked about last week where I had extras for the extras. I always had things on backup, and we were very blessed to have a lot of space in that home that we were in. And there was this. Just automatic tendency to fill every corner with something, even if it was some random decor, just to make it look like there was something there. And the version of me now that reflects and looks back at all of that is very different. I don't see all of it the same way anymore. I definitely have a less is more. Mentality because I am living it and I'm feeling it. And I am so grateful for this experience now where the choice to move and relocate was just a natural progression of letting go of a lot of things. But it has really taught me something so incredibly valuable about this. Less is more concept because. It is creating so much more space, way less for me to manage, and I found that I was just getting kind of caught up in the things before, and now I wanna be caught up in the experiences in the best way possible. And so just by naturally having less and decluttering my life that way has been such a beautiful gift and I'm gonna continue this journey. So passionate about it, and that's why I'm showing up in this space and sharing this on my podcast journey. Also on Instagram, it's very vulnerable, but I realize so many people are likely feeling the same way. I've worked for almost 15 years working with people one-on-one and zooming in on values first, and really making space in our lives for the things that truly matter, and I've learned. So much from this, we're gonna continue to develop these stories week over week about some of the unexpected ways. 'cause again, I don't think it's as simple as just decluttering your physical space. This is so much more and incredibly intentional. So I encourage you to think about this deeply. And really, you know, the goal is to not have a perfect home, and you don't even have to have a minimalist home. I always thought I needed to fit into, the minimalist box, But I realized that's not it. That doesn't fit for me. I just want a home that actually fits the life that we're living right now, and that feels best for us. And here's what I want you to take away from this. Finding these things during your own decluttering is not discouraging. It's actually a really good sign. It means you're paying attention. It means that you've grown, your season has shifted, and your home just hasn't caught up yet. That's okay. That's why you have this space. We can work on it together. I'm doing it in real time with you in my thirty-day decluttering journey. It's a little vulnerable, but if I can share that with other people and inspire them to take these little steps day by day, space by space, and inspire them, then it's all so worth it. So as you move through your spaces this week, just notice, does this still belong in the life I'm living? Does this still fit the season you're in? You don't have to do anything dramatic here. Just start noticing. That awareness is where it all begins. And speaking of showing up, I wanna hear from you. Where are you getting stuck? What spaces or areas of your life feel the most overwhelming right now? I want this show to actually serve you, so feel free to drop me a DM on Instagram or shoot me an email. Both are linked in the show notes. And let me know what topics you want us to dig into together. I'm genuinely all ears, and I read every single one. And before I let you go, I have something really exciting coming up that I cannot wait to share with you. We are bringing on our very first guest to the show soon, and we're diving into a topic I know so many of us moms are already thinking about: our closets. Because wow, that is a loaded space with so many layers in it. So make sure you're following the show so you don't miss that one. It is going to be such a good conversation. And if this episode resonated with you and you want a next step, grab the One Space Reset Kit. It is a short guided reset to help you clear one space at a time, whether that's a space in your home or one of the open loops weighing on you. You can find the link in the show notes. And if you enjoy this episode, be sure to follow the show so you don't miss your Monday reset. Make it a great day, guys.

Speaker 17 18:02

A quick note before we close. This podcast is for education and inspiration. It's not a substitute for therapy or medical care. If you are needing mental health support, please reach out to a licensed provider in your area.