7. How Building Capacity, Not Doing More, Is the Secret of Sustainable Success

Doing more is often seen as the path to success, but for many high achieving women, it is the very thing leading to burnout.

In this solo episode, Robina explores the idea that sustainable success is not built by adding more to your plate, but by expanding your capacity to hold what is already there. She unpacks how constantly pushing, producing, and performing can keep you stuck in cycles of overwhelm, even when things look successful on the outside.

This conversation shifts the focus from output to internal support. Robina shares how nervous system capacity shapes your ability to lead, make decisions, and stay present in both life and work, and why building that foundation changes everything.

In this episode, she discusses:

• Why doing more is not the answer to feeling behind or overwhelmed
• What capacity actually means and how it impacts your daily life
• The connection between nervous system regulation and sustainable success
• How to recognize when you are operating beyond your current capacity
• What it looks like to build success from a place that feels steady and supportive

Connect with Robina:

• Website: https://routeofhealing.com
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/routeofhealing/
• Personalized Hormone Balance Reset Quiz: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/698b478d8ecf7e3441a4c914

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hello and welcome to this episode of The Regulated CEO. And this one I'm going to do something a little bit different. I am talking today with no guests, but I really want to talk about the hidden cost of low capacity and how women just aren't realizing that we are operating on a system that just can't hold anymore. And so we really have to think about how we can help the body, because most of us don't realize that we're at capacity and we just think that this is what life feels like. We're always operating on this cost of we're at our limits. Some of the things I want to discuss today is becoming aware of the energy and how it becomes so inconsistent. So you'll notice you might wake up feeling tired, no matter how much sleep you get. You rely on adrenaline throughout the day. So it's like coffee after coffee. You crash when you finally stop. I want you to think about nighttime and how much you literally just stop and you can't go on anymore because you feel like you just are finally able to rest. We look at things like elevated cortisol levels and how the stress that we are at right now is literally robbing from our sex hormones. And so some of the things that show up in a lot of our clients are weight gain, irregular cycles, sleep disruption, and so many other things. So we really want to pay attention to the level of stress that we're feeling, but not looking at it from a standpoint of stress reduction, but also learning how to help our body. So we're exhausted, we can't fully settle. Our minds are constantly running. The body doesn't really stop and drop into recovery. And then this is where we really want to teach people about nervous system regulation and how to feel safe. Another thing that's happening is that our emotional capability comes smaller. We become more reactive, we shut down. You notice that small things are really making us feel overwhelmed and we lose our access to our patients, our clarity, and our perspective. So this is not about us feeling broken anymore. In fact, this is a matter of us starting to recognize that, okay, we're holding a lot. We're holding our families, we're holding our businesses, we're holding maybe our parents are getting elderly. We have more responsibility and less time to really respond to life. And we become stuck in this reactivity mode. And so what we really have to learn to do is work with that capacity. What does that look like for many of us? For many of us, it really is about understanding and getting feedback on what is happening around us in our environment, in the things that we're dealing with, in our life, and how we're reacting to them. So until you're starting to notice that you are lashing out on loved ones, you are waking up and you're having no energy, no matter if you're having an eight or a 10 hour sleep, or you're noticing as soon as you hit the bed, you're constantly feeling like you don't even have a problem with sleeping. But the result is you're exhausted no matter how much sleep you're getting, then that's really helping you understand that there are some things that your body is trying to speak to you. But like some of my past guests have said, we don't have the language. We don't have the ability to understand what our body is saying to us because we've been constantly overriding our system. We've been constantly pushing past that capacity. And to be honest with you, at a certain point, that works for us, right? If you think about in your 20s, you're exhausted, but you're still pushing the dial, you're still pushing past, right? And you're able to do that. The body is so resilient that it's able to do all those things. And then over the years, you'll notice that, hey, the time that I was able to pull all night, or is the time I was able to go out all night and then drink and then come back, and I don't bounce back the same way is because the body just doesn't have that capacity. I want you to think about it like a bucket. And our nervous system is a bucket. You know, when you go to those children's water parks and they have those buckets and they fill up with water, and then after a while, the water fills up and then goes out, and then it fills up again. Think of that like your nervous system. It's holding all of the things, the family system, the business, the kids, the responsibilities, the in-laws, the parents, the environmental stressors, right? Because we can't forget about those things. They do affect the nervous system. And so what ends up happening is over time, that bucket is holding all this water, but it's getting weathered. And I'm not saying that we're weathered as people, but what's happening is there are things that are poking holes in the bucket. There are things that are maybe, if it's made out of wood, like the wood is starting to deteriorate a little bit because the nervous system is not meant to hold that much for so long. It's meant to be stressed and then go back into the parasympathetic. So we're meant to go into fight or flight because life is stressful. We're meant to be stressed. That's how we grow, that's how we excel in life, but we're also meant to go into the parasympathetic and rest and recuperate and collect our thoughts and teach the body that it is safe. And so we're not broken. I want us to really understand that. But more importantly, we have this translation that has been broken. We're not understanding how to speak to our bodies anymore. We're not understanding how to decipher the language that it's speaking to us. And so that translates in so many ways within our business, within our life, and just in general, you'll notice that maybe your career feels heavier, your decisions become harder, and everything really takes more effort. And so, what a lot of women do is they start questioning themselves. And this is really where I want this to land is that you feel a disconnection from yourself. You push through instead of checking in. We do all the things because we feel like we need to persevere through all of those things, but we don't check in with ourselves and ask us how we're feeling, what we're noticing. And so what ends up happening is we do become disconnected from our true self. We start operating from a place of scarcity. We don't operate from a place of rest and abundance. We don't operate from a place of trust. We operate from a place of distrust. And a lot of the high-achieving women that I do work with, one of the things that I notice is that they feel like they have to do everything themselves because they can't trust that somebody else is going to do it to the same level of perfection, do it to the same level and not have work fall on their lap and make more work for them. So they recognize that they have all these systems in place to protect themselves. But in fact, it's not really protecting themselves. It's actually creating more of a disconnection from themselves. And so when we stop trusting our body and we stop trusting our intuition, we really feel like we are constantly on. This is where we really start to understand that there is so much more to us than just the physical body. When I work with clients, I work on them on five different levels. And one of them is that energetic level. So I want you to think about when you walk into a room and you feel like a heaviness, or when you meet someone, you feel like, oh, that person is not my person. There's something about them. That is them bumping into what's called your biofield. So I want you to think about this big bubble. And yes, this kind of sounds like woo-woo, but there is data that supports that we do have a biofield around us. And Rupert Sheldrake is one of the people that have come up with this theory. And there is energetic information in there that we are holding. And so, what is really important is we need to pay attention to what is happening with us energetically when we are at capacity and understand that it's trying to protect us. And this is what a lot of people don't understand is that when the energetic body becomes weakened, that's when illness starts to kick in. And so when the body starts to get into dis-ease. So a lot of us believe that the physical body is the thing that is wearing us down. But in all actuality, it's not. When we look at things like the way that we've perceived things in life, and so we think that these certain things, when they happen and they show up in our business, it is a reflection that we're not successful or we're not doing something right, or that people don't feel that we have the capabilities. But these are all usually reflections of things that have happened subconsciously that are in our periphery. So I want you to kind of think about when our capacity is low, it's a signal to us to understand that energetically we are also low. And when everything feels like too much and your life feels like you've worked so hard to build this, but yet you feel like you're disconnected from it, I want you to pay attention to what is actually happening. And this is honestly why so many high-achieving women feel like everything is right that they're doing, but their body is not responding to it the way that they want to. This is because this issue is not about effort, it's about capacity. And so, how do you teach the body to regain capacity? Because that's the first thing you should be asking. And how we teach the body to regain capacity is little micro things that we embed into our day-to-day. So anyone who's super busy and is listening to this podcast is probably a high-achieving woman who is running the show. They are taking care of their business, taking care of their family, taking care of the, you know, life, right? They're really managing life. And so to add one more thing becomes so difficult. That's why when I talk to a lot of my clients and I talk to them about, you know, you need to meditate. A lot of them like, I can't meditate. I can't drop the ball. Like, I literally don't have time to meditate. I can't shut my brain off. And so we really start to understand that the reason why we can't shut our brain off is because we are not trusting. We cannot get into that feeling of being able to let go because we're building from survival. And so I like to teach my clients how to build capacity in small micro things, microhabits throughout the day. So maybe it's something like learning how to do box breathing and teaching your body how to rest and recuperate, even when things are stressful. When we take a breath, it's teaching the body, wow, okay, I might be under attack in my brain and biochemically I'm releasing all these hormones and things like that. But when we breathe, we're actually resetting the nervous system. We're pressing pause and we're allowing the body to say, I am not being under attack. Because everything, a thought, a feeling, is signaling to your nervous system that it is being under attack. And so all of the things are gonna happen, like you're in the Serengeti being chased by a tiger. Your body is literally gonna take circulation away from your stomach. So you won't be able to digest things because the priority is to run. So all the blood flow, everything is going to your extremities to fuel that in your body. When we teach the body slowly and surely, little micro things like a breath. So breathing in for four, holding for four, exhaling for four, and doing nothing for four, and then breathing in for four and holding for four and exhaling for four and doing nothing for four. And if you do that for let's say three minutes, you'll notice you will feel different. You will notice that your body will feel like it's in a different headspace. And so doing little things in a big way really does teach the body how to build capacity. More and more women are understanding that's why, you know, they're doing things like yoga. That's why they're doing things like learning about meditation, but they just don't know how to implement it. So one of the things that I truly believe is the more repetition, the more consistency, we're gonna teach the body how to go into that feeling of feeling safe and developing that capacity. So let's look at something like your schedule and you look at your week and you know this week you're bombarded with things to do. I want you to kind of not look at the overall picture of the week because when we look at that, we feel overwhelmed. There's so many things you have to do, so many things in a day, and it feels very overwhelming. So, what we want to really focus on is doing one thing at a time. Once you're done one, then you can focus on the next. And so what we've been taught as women, especially as high-achieving women, is the more that we hold the capacity for all the things that I have to do. Okay, I have to cook dinner, I have to make sure that I prepare for this meeting, I have to make sure I show up, I have to make sure that I manage the office properly, I have to make sure all the numbers are coming in and the ins and outs of the business are balancing. I have to make sure that we have that retreat planned. We are holding all of these things. It makes complete sense why we are not able to function the way we used to because there are holes in our bucket. And so, what we want to teach you is how to learn to teach the nervous system to slowly fill in those holes, but also to discern what you are doing in your life that is giving you energy and taking energy. And so, one of the things I teach my clients and the regulated CEO is how to do audits, how to energetically audit your life, looking at it from a business perspective. What things in your business are giving you energy, what things in your business are taking energy, what things are profitable and what things are not profitable, what relationships are creating a dissonance in your body, and what relationships are giving you back. When we start to energetically do audits in our business, in our lives, in our day-to-day, we start to recognize where we can build capacity, where we can release what doesn't serve us, and where we can start to understand the things that we need to do in order to move the dial. You see, the key here is not to do more, to produce more effort, to feel like we are running ourselves ragged to build these beautiful businesses that are going to create a legacy for ourselves, but in fact, it's the opposite. It's like, how could I build capacity? How could I learn to discern what is right for me and what I need to let go? Because if we're building businesses from a system that is not on a solid foundation, we cannot have a sustainable business. You cannot build a business that is around you and you are not taking care of yourself because the business will fall apart when you fall apart. So, how do you build a business from a place of safety? How do you integrate within your week little microhabits that are going to sustain you? And that's the key here. That's why this regulated CEO was born, is because we've recognized that there is a gap here. We have taught women that the only way that they can be successful is by giving all of themselves to it and still feeling like they have to give all of themselves to their family, to every aspect of their life and neglect their health, neglect their care. And when I talk about self-care, I'm not talking about a manicure and a pedicure and an occasional massage. I'm talking about integration, integrating things into your day-to-day to help sustain you, not just as a founder, not just as a CEO, not just as a woman, as a mother, as a wife, as a partner, but as an individual. We need to take care of the whole and not just pieces of you. And that's what tends to happen with successful women is we are doing peacework with ourselves. We are giving our all to everything else that we are building, but we are left in pieces. And then what you've noticed in a lot of these podcasts is it's the pieces of us that come on this podcast and speak about what happened and how we've rebuilt ourselves. The goal for this podcast is not for you to end up where we have been. It's to teach you preventatively, it's to help you recognize wow, that's the path that I'm going on. And when I see that there are these women that have gone the way and they know the way, and now they're showing us what I need to do to do it, then that's what happens. You see, one thing I have noticed as I've been doing this work for so many years is that people don't change unless they are hit by impact, illness, a death in the family, a business shutdown, you know, when they have to. The hope and inspiration behind this podcast is to help you to decide the life that you want, create the healthy body and mind and spirit that you want, and have the business that you want at the same time. So we're building a new blueprint from a place of success. So this week is all about asking yourself, where am I at capacity in my system? How is it showing up in my body? And what types of things can I do to start to integrate little micro habits into my day that are going to support me? Who are the relationships that I have that are giving energy to me? Which ones are taking too much energy from me? Start to make a practice of your day-to-day of doing audits, and you'll start to recognize where the holes are. And so once we recognize where the holes are, then we can start to actually integrate different strategies and methods on how to build your capacity so that you can lead a regulated life versus building one from scarcity and that is going to lead you down the path of disease. I'm so grateful that you joined me today. And I hope something in this podcast really resonated with you. You know where to find me on the regulated CEO every week, where we're talking to different women, as well as on my website, therootofhealing.com, and it's R-O-U-T-Ehealing.com. Until next time, guys, hope you enjoyed this episode. And let me know if you want more solo episodes like this, because I feel like this is a really great way to help you with integration as well as motivation.