Men, Women and Marriage

In this episode of THE GRIPE, Stitch and Rick dive into the chaos, comedy, and contradictions of modern marriage. From expiring marriage licenses to why men just want five minutes of silence. What starts as a joke about renewing your spouse like a driver’s license turns into a brutally honest (and hilarious) breakdown of how men and women communicate, misunderstand, and somehow still stay together.

Drawing from 17+ years of marriages, friendship, and real‑life stories, the guys unpack:

• Why marriage should come with a 3‑year, 5‑year, or 7‑year trial license
• How men decompress vs. how women “check in”
• Why couples fight over movies, phones, and dinner decisions
• The real reason men need a basement, garage, attic, or “quiet corner”
• Why lesbian couples have the highest divorce rate  while gay men the lowest
• How friendships get tangled when wives stop speaking
• The unspoken rules of male communication vs. the emotional landmines of female communication

It’s raw, funny, unfiltered, and painfully relatable. If you’ve ever been married, dated, lived with someone, or just tried to watch a movie with a partner who’s on their phone, this episode will hit home.

THE GRIPE continues its mission: real conversations, real life, real laughs — no scripts, no filters.

Be sure to check out a special "He Said - She Said" blog written by our MTC Studio staff writers! MTC Studio BLOG page

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:03

Welcome to the Gripe with your hosts, Stitch Mainville and Rick Garrett. Marriage, it's one of those things everybody thinks they understand until they're actually in it. Suddenly, you're navigating trash day mind games and the eternal mystery of why the person you love most can still baffle you more than anyone else on the planet. As you'll hear in today's conversation, men and women don't always speak the same language, don't always want the same things, and sure as hell, don't always see the world the same way. But buried inside the jokes, the frustration, and the you won't believe what she said to me stories is something real. The strange, stubborn, beautiful truth that partnership is messy, hilarious, and deeply human on this episode of The Gripe. Your pilot's license has an expiration date, your driver's license has an expiration date, your hunting license has an expiration date. Everything does, yeah. Shouldn't the marriage license have an expiration date? I don't understand why that's a license, ain't it? It's a license. Yeah, it's a license. It should come. License meaning you are now recognized to be able to perform blah, blah, blah. Right. All right. So if that's a license, it should have an expiration date. Right. And if you piss me off ten times in one year, I'm done with you. Well, you gotta wait for the license to expire, all right? So you let's say you go into a marriage with a three-year license, a five-year license, and a ten-year license. Okay, I go for it works. Just to see. Just to see. Well, the first three years might be magical. Yeah. Year four, you might find out it's nuts. So in my mind, I'm gonna go for the seven-year because of the seven-year itch. Oh, yeah. All right. So I'm gonna take a seven-year license. Okay. And I'm committed for seven years. I want to make this marriage work. But then when that seven years comes up, because I've gotten to know her, I think, pretty well. Yeah, you should have. So now we have to go back and we have to renew our license. And now we're standing in front of somebody at some municipal building, and they're like, okay, do you want to renew your license? And I look at her and I go, you know what? Based on the past seven years, I don't think so. And right there, we should be able to go, there's no alimony, there's no court fighting, there's no anything. Everything goes in the strategy. Now, then they're gonna ask me back, well, are there kids involved? Oh, in the past seven years, yes, we have one child. Okay, now you need to go that way. But if there's no kids involved, see it. You go your way, you go your way. Whatever was purchased in the middle is sold and split, go. And leave it at that. Yeah. I think that's phenomenal. That makes sense to me. But if you both look at one another and go, yes, it was great, let's let's renew our marriage license, then that's the permanent marriage license. Okay. That's no expiration date. That's when you're done. Oh, you're locked the fuck in. So, in other words, marriages should be on a trial basis. Absolutely. Absolutely. Because you don't know, you could Nadina and I dated for five years before we got married. Okay. Well, I think then y'all made the right decision. We dated for five years, then we got married, had our this would, all right. Right now, we just celebrated our 12th wedding anniversary.

unknown 3:26

Right.

SPEAKER_01 3:27

So we've been together for 17 years. Right. And me and believe it or not, me and Mar me and Marie just celebrated our 17th year anniversary. Okay. So we've been married 17 years. We've been married 17 years. We got together in 2006. Okay. We got together in 2009. But we got but we got married in 2008. Okay. So that's when you and I met shortly after you were married. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We got married in 2008. Let's go back to the first time we all hung out. Nay had been trying to set me up with her friends' husbands. This is when y'all lived at the bottom. Right? That's the first time I met you. And you cooked out down the bottom. Yeah, we were down on the bottom. That's right. But before all that, like she was she had tried to introduce me to a few guys. Um, one of their co-workers that they worked with had a husband, a little weird guy. I did not like him. And she made me go to a restaurant and sit there with them the whole time. And I was just like, I don't, I'm not comfortable. Yeah. So when she said about my friend Marie, she's got this husband written, and I was just like, oh, here we go again. Here we go. And I said, no, I don't want to. She's like, but you'll like him. He's nice. And I said, I remember saying this, I said, I don't care. I don't want to meet him. Yeah, right. Because of all the other bad experiences that she had with him. Yeah, yeah. But then we did meet. We found out that we had a lot in common and things were cool. Okay, so one, eh? You got one out of nine, all right? Well, I felt like a little kid on a play date. Go, go play with your thing. You and I were sitting over in a sandbox like, I don't mind that.

SPEAKER_02 5:05

That's the truth. That's crazy.

SPEAKER_01 5:08

Yeah. Marriage. Marriage. Oh, marriage. That's all you can say. Who would have fucking vintage? I I like I like the concept of having someone in my life. Like, oh yeah. I I don't like being lonely, but I enjoy being alone. Alone? Hey, I think that's every man. I think that's every man. Which is why I have a part of the house that I can go to. And then when I want to be around someone, I can go be around someone. When you're not married, there's no one ever there. That's lonely. That's lonely. But the things we gotta put up with, because women are just, they are creatures unlike anything on this planet. They're not like if I see a dog on the street, I know how that dog's gonna react. He's either gonna bark and charge me, or he's gonna wing his tail. And want you to pet me. That's it, one or the other. Yeah. Alright? If I see a man on the street, he's either gonna give me a chin knife, fist bump, or just look at me like I'm nuts and walk by. Yeah, and don't say nothing. I can predict that. Yeah. But a woman never know what's going through their head, what's gonna happen, where they're gonna be at. And they just they they they confound everything. So the fact that we gotta spend our lives with them.

SPEAKER_02 6:34

Oh, jeez.

SPEAKER_01 6:36

Nay asked me what I wanted for dinner. And when I told her what I wanted for dinner, she told me I was wrong. That's that's a woman.

SPEAKER_02 6:51

What's she asked to do?

SPEAKER_01 6:52

She'd ask me, what do you want for dinner? And I think her, I don't know, let's make some burgers. No. I wanted I was thinking like eggplants. Well, if you were thinking why would you eat what would you have one? You know, that's what I'm saying. I don't know. Yep, yeah, I go through the same thing. I go through the same thing. We don't all do. We all have to. Did you know this? I I I I found this interesting. The highest rate of divorce in this country is with lesbian marriages. No, I didn't do that. The lowest rate of divorce is with gay men. Gay men. Yeah. Because we know how to read each other. Men get along way better than women get along. Yeah, yeah, yeah. One woman, one lesbian woman had said, I understand. Because she had to live with another woman. She had to get married to another woman, and it just doesn't work. And they're going to be button heads all the time.

SPEAKER_03 7:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 7:48

I I kind of envy gay dudes. I mean, could I couldn't I mean you sitting around watching T unless it was like one of those feminine gay dudes, I couldn't deal with that. Because that's basically a woman, but with a dick. But two guys. That's how modern life uh has the the gay guy, the two gay guys, though they're they're one's more flamboyant than the other. Yeah, yeah. But I mean, they're just two guys. They like to watch TV, they like to do stuff together. Oh, okay. That's just who guys are. Yeah. Like, I could come down here, I don't even have to have the TV on. I could just sit in the chair, and I just want to decompress and relax. That's all I'm doing. Mm-hmm. She'll come down. What are you doing? If I wanted you to know, I would have told you what I'm doing. Or you'd have been upstairs. Or have been upstairs, exactly. But what are you doing? I'm just sitting here. Why? What's wrong? Nothing's wrong. I'm just sitting here. Well, something's wrong. What's what's wrong? Why are you sitting? Nay, I'm just sitting here. Well why are you getting mad? I wasn't mad until you started all this. I was fine. I was just sitting here. That's the same thing. Well, there's gotta be something wrong. I don't think women understand. We go through so much throughout the day that sometimes we don't want we don't want our work on us. We don't want our co-workers. We don't want to have to look at a computer or a screen or a phone or hear a woman say something. We just want to sit. Yeah. And that's it. It's not that there's anything wrong. It's not that you did anything wrong. Just let me sit. Just let me be a guy. And that's that's that's what I go through. But thankfully, I'm good. You know what? Long as I'm in the house, I think she's okay. Yeah. You know what I mean? She said, at least I know where you're at. I said, but I said, I'm gonna make sure. Are you lonely? Do you want me to do you want me to come up here and watch TV with you? Because you know I'm downstairs watching sports and listening to my listening to the sports station.

SPEAKER_02 9:51

She said, I know where you're at. I know where to find you. You know, and she said, You know me anyway. I'm gonna let I'm gonna sit in this couch and I'll be sleep probably pretty soon.

SPEAKER_01 10:01

That's what she said. I said, Well, thank you. I said, as long as you know where I'm at, I'm not doing anything. I tried that with Nay once. Yeah. I felt bad because I do the same thing. Yeah, I do feel bad. If I'm not up in my room in the attic, I'm down in the basement. Yeah. So one day, and she sits in the living room watching TV. So one day I was like, you know what? I'm just gonna go hang in the living room with her. Yeah. So we ordered food, we had food brought in, I think it was Chinese. We're sitting at the living room Chinese, and we put on a movie to watch a movie. That's what we do. That's what we do. We eat that anything. But here's the thing she'll lean on the coat on the sofa away from me, and then get her phone and play her game while the movie's on. Okay. Now I'm sitting there, I'm like, all right, if you don't want to watch the movie, you could at least lean on me and talk to me. We can spend some time together. Right, right. But no, I get her feet and her ass. That's it, because the rest of her is at the other end of the couch playing her game. Start playing with it. You know what I get for that? You're nasty. Is that all you think about? Is that all you think about? You're nasty. Well, go ahead and finish that. No, but I mean, it makes me think, why didn't I just stay downstairs? Because if I'm up here to spend time with her and she'd rather be on her phone, I hate phones, man. I think they're the worst. But if she'd rather be on her phone, then am I interrupting her? Am I bothering her routine? Am I in a you know what I mean? Mm-hmm. Hey, that happens in my house too, because uh we'd be watching, we're supposed to be watching the show, and I'm complaining to her all the time. She said, You think I'm not paying attention? I'm I know exactly what's going on in that. I said, I said, okay, what happened? Thank you. Yes, what just happened? What did you miss? Yeah, I'm I'm I'm sitting there watching, you know what I mean? And I got my laptop open, but I had already looked at everything. I just leave it open. She said, Well, you're sitting on your computer. I said, I'm not looking at it. I said, I'm paying attention to this show. Did you see what happened just now? And she's she's laying on the couch like this, like you said. She'll get mad at me because I know how she is. And when we're watching a movie, if I see something that I realize that's important, we're gonna need to know that, I start tapping her. Like, hey, you might want to pay attention to what's going on. And she goes, What? I've seen it. What did you see? They were they were talking, no, what did you see? Not what did you hear? What did you see? Yeah. Oh, that's that's what she says. Go ahead. Go ahead. Yeah. And I'm like, you might have heard what's going on, but you're not looking at it. You're not seeing what's going on. Yeah. Yeah, because the guy's like, no, I don't have a gun, and I'm not gonna shoot you. Yeah, but you're not seeing that he has a gun and he's gonna shoot. Yeah, you're not seeing it.

SPEAKER_02 12:39

That's the thing, I keep trying to get it get it across. Because uh Marie be she'd be like, I'm listening. That's all she's saying.

SPEAKER_01 12:47

She's looking at the TV, but I'm listening to it. Yeah, you're not watching it. Why is it ridiculous? Well, take ours, for instance. Ours are fighting. They're not fighting, they're they're having a disagreement, they're no longer speaking. Yeah, and for the longest time, that kept a rift between the two of us. No, not really. Well, you and me never had a wrist. We didn't have a wrist, but there was like a year and a half where we didn't see one another. Yeah, exactly. In my brain, I didn't think she was letting you hang with me. And also, I didn't want to say, hey, I'm going to Rick's because I thought it would upset her. That's what I was telling Marie, too. So we were just basically texting one another. Yeah. I'm gonna let you know. Marie always said, she said, why don't you ask Stitch to just come over here? Y'all can throw darts in the basement. She said, I don't bother nobody or nothing.

SPEAKER_02 13:40

She said, I'll give them. And I said that, I said, yeah. I said, I would, but I said, I don't want to make Nadine mad. You know what I mean? Right.

SPEAKER_01 13:49

Because I want everybody to be together. Yeah. You know what I mean? And I said, I'm sure, I'm pretty sure Stitch wouldn't feel funny coming over here by himself. Nope, when Nadine couldn't come. Nope. Fucker. I'll come over and throw the hurt through my brother, man. I don't give a shit.

SPEAKER_02 14:19

That's what I told him, though. That's what I told him. I still, I said, I don't know. I said, I want to ask this to come over or me, let's just hang out. But I feel bad because you guys won't hang out like that.

SPEAKER_01 14:32

Like, you know what I miss the most?

SPEAKER_02 14:33

That's what I told you.

SPEAKER_01 14:34

Here's what I miss the most. Father's Day picnics. Oh, yeah. Well, I ain't have nothing this Father's Day, though. I didn't have nothing last Father's Day. Ever since my twins were born on Father's Day weekend, that's my weekend. Right. You've been you've been going to Indianapolis. So we haven't been doing it. No problem, no problem. I'm just saying, if it's not Father's Day, we should pick another weekend where we can do that. But we got the two of them who won't be in the same room together. That's what I was saying. Because they talk a different language. But here's the thing. Let me let me let me just say this. If you were at a bar and some guy walks up and goes, You're Rick, right? Yeah. If this guy Stitch says he knows you. Yeah, I know Stitch. Okay. He said you're kind of a jerk. Okay. I would I would call him a liar. But anyway, go ahead. You would call him a liar, but when you see me, what would you say? I say, Stitch, this dude told me that you was a jerk. He said, I said, I don't know who he was. Do you know this guy or whatever? And then I'd say, and then I'd tell you, he said, you said I was a jerk. We would confront one another and get the whole story out, right? Oh, yeah. No, I wouldn't be mad enough. I would just let you know what he was saying. We would communicate, is what I'm saying. Exactly. Well, women don't do that. A woman hears something, that bitch said what? Yeah. You're right. Fuck that bitch. I ain't talking to her no more. Yeah, it's not. Well, hold up. You didn't ask that bitch if she said anything. And when I see her, I'ma kick her ass. Yeah, yeah. Women. Oh my God. That's the woman mindset. That's the stuff I don't understand with women. That's true. They baffle me. They don't want to settle things, they just want to confront you. And they do that in marriage, too. Oh boy. Mm-mm-mm. Yep. You alright. I think guys are. We're very basic. We understand our feelings. We don't need to express them. Right? No, no, yeah, right. Here's a for instance. When you and I first started talking, like the first time we hung out after this whole incident with the two with them. Right? And I got back. Did you get to see Rick? Did you spend time with Rick? Yeah, we had a good time. What'd you talk about? Nothing. What do you mean, nothing? You were just with him for like four hours. What do you mean you didn't do you didn't talk? It's nothing important. I mean, three darts. Is everything okay? Yeah, he won a couple games. I won a couple games. Yeah, we're fine. No, no, but I mean, is everything okay? Okay. What are you trying to say? Exactly. And that's just it. If while we were throwing darts, you had something that was bothering you, you'd have said, hey man, you know what I was thinking? And I'd be like, what's up? And we would have had it out, and that would have been cool. Done. But the woman mindset is like this. Oh, this is gonna be a part of it, and that's gonna be a part of it. The only thing about it, I didn't want to have nothing to do with it. So I was I was into hanging out with you and throwing darts. That was it. That's it. That's all I want. That's all I I don't want to talk no women's shit. I didn't, I didn't want to talk no women's shit. And here's the thing, though. Here's the thing. When we threw darts, did we talk women's shit? No. No. I don't know. Why would we? I can't tell you what we did talk about, other than the score and how well we were shooting. And how how bad you were whipping my ass. And I was drink, I was drinking, I was drinking that uh bigger match. But that's just it. We are in the moment. Men are in the moment. Men can relate to men in the moment. Oh, damn. There's we don't need all that emotional shit. No, I don't even, I don't even want to deal with that, man. I'm telling you, man, we know how to have fun. Women don't know how to have fun. It's a controversy all the time. I'm trying to tell you. And the thing about it, and then that night, the only thing Marie asked me was, Well, what did was Nadine with y'all? I said, no. It was just me and Stitch. And uh she said, Well, what did y'all talk about? I said, darts? That's what I said. We had the same conversation. You know why? I said because you were talking to a woman and I was talking to a woman. I said, let me tell you this. I said, I'm not letting Stitch talk me into drinks no more because every time he whipped my ass, I had to drink a shot. That's what I told her. I said, that's what me and Stitch talked about. Oh, that's right. That's what I told her. That's what our game was, wasn't it? If you lose the game, you had to get a yagging. You killed me. Well, we played what? Seven games and you won one one. Yeah, that's what I told her. But of course, she has. She said, Well, did Nadine come down and join y'all? I said, no. No. Well, so okay, conversation's over. That was why I was saying about I could predict a dog, I could predict a man. I cannot predict a woman. You never know what they're gonna do or how they're gonna react. And it's almost like we're talking in two different languages. Right. Here's a for instance. Nay says to me one day, hey, um, when the garbage cans are brought down, are they picked up that night or that morning? Now, what she was really saying in woman speak and Nadine speak was don't forget to take the trash out. I was getting ready to say, you need to get the cans out there because you know they pick them up in the morning. First thing in the morning. And they can just I know. And I said to her, I'm like, what do you what do you why why where is this coming from? Yeah. Well you was never concerned about the trash before. Exactly. So she says, Oh, I it was just a thought I had. No, no. Because you're a woman, there's there's a whole there's a whole thing to it. It's not just a thought. All right, there's a whole thing to it. I better remind this man, this knucklehead, uh, he's gotta take the trash out. And I know I gotta take the trash out. And you know what? Here's the thing. I know it's in the morning. So if I don't do it Wednesday night, I know I have until 10 o'clock Thursday morning to take it out. Right, right, right. Now, see, I get I get the same thing. Marie hints around too about stuff. Don't forget this, don't forget or whatever. She don't even necessarily say don't forget. But so in that situation, she would never have to, she knows she would never have to remind me to take the trash out because I know that's like on my calendar in my head. I know every Monday morning the trash goes out. And every Sunday night, I take the cans out there and I stick them in the alley. Exactly. I know every Thursday morning my trash gets picked up. I know every Wednesday night it is and you know what? If the if if Wednesday gets away from me and I don't get to bring it down, all right, I'll get it in the morning. I will make sure I wake up early enough to bring it downstairs. So, but if if I get if I like uh not get bad, but be aggressive and like, okay, why do you why did you feel that you had to tell me? That you know what I mean? But they don't tell us, they speak around it, yeah. But yeah, the whole question: why didn't you just say, Don't forget it's Wednesday night? And I would have been like, I know, I know, yeah. That would have been it. Not this whole dog and pony show. I'm just saying, and the thing about it with me, Marie knows when I'm being a smart ass.

SPEAKER_02 22:24

Because I'm I'm a smart ass. You know what I said. I would, I would, I just look at it and just like, you really thought you had to say that, huh? You know good well, I'm gonna take that trash out. I take it out every every every Sunday night, I take my trash out. I take the trash out.

SPEAKER_01 22:42

And if we ain't got none, and if I don't take the trash out, that's me, because we ain't got none. You know what? Here we are, we're in our 60s. Mm-hmm. We have our wives. Let's just say we didn't have a wife. Let's just say we're both 60 and single. And then then we wouldn't have to, we wouldn't have to hear it. You have to be a smart ass person. Not just that though, but we're still at an age where we we still wanna we still wanna, you know, have uh relations. Yeah, yeah. To be polite. All right. So um when I was a kid, if I looked at an older woman, I would think to myself, ew, how does an old dude want to do that? All right, but now let me ask you this. Here we are in our 60s. If you see an attractive 60-year-old woman, I want to do it. It doesn't make you say, ooh, does it? No, I don't know. But that same should be like, damn, she looks good for 60. Yeah. But that same 60-year-old woman to a 20-year-old, they're like, that's gross. It's probably dried up. Yeah. She can't do nothing for me. And little, little do you know when you're that young, whatever, them, that's when them women are, they know they've been through some shit you don't know nothing about. They will jack you up. They will teach you some shit. That's why a cougar speed. That's why a cougar is a cougar. A cougar is a cougar. That's why they call a cougar. They will devour you. Oh, hell yeah. Yeah, make you want to come back for more.

SPEAKER_02 24:06

You know that.

unknown 24:07

Man.

SPEAKER_01 24:08

I better shut up because Marie's gonna see this. Nah.

SPEAKER_02 24:14

But no, it's the honest God's truth.

SPEAKER_01 24:16

Man. Do you think it's creepy? Do you think it's creepy when a 60-year-old woman wants to bang a 20-year-old dude? Do I think it's creepy? Yeah. I think it's sex. All right, but do you think it's creepy when a 60-year-old man wants to bang a 20-year-old girl? I think it's disgusting.

SPEAKER_02 24:35

No, it's just no, I'm just kidding, man. I'm just kidding. Because I'm shit, I'm 65. And if I wasn't married or anything, I'd go out there and I'd color my beard and everything else like that. And go out there, hey baby, how you doing? They say, hey, you old man, get away from me. Oh head. Oh head, oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:00

If I'm a 30-year-old good-looking guy working in a McDonald's, okay, and a gorgeous 30-year-old woman drives up and I start hitting on her, she's gonna be like, Ha, you work at McDonald's, what the fuck do I need you for? And drive off, right? You're right. But if a gorgeous looking, say, 29-year-old girl is working in McDonald's, and I'm a 29-year-old dude, and I pull up to the window, I'd be like, hey, what's up, baby? I'm gonna try to get with her. That's there that's another difference between men and women. Yeah. Women look at status. Yes, they do all the time. And men look at physique. Yeah, yeah. Right. I don't care what kind of job you get. As long as you can please me, I'm happy. You know it. I keep thinking about, I keep thinking about us driving and everything else like that. Man, you don't know how totally happy I am that it's quiet in the car when I'm driving. I when I drive out to Indianapolis to see my son, going by myself, I love it. I'm happy by myself. Here's why. When she's with me, I'm happy, she's with me, but I'm frustrated that she's not paying attention or talking to me. You know what I mean? Yeah. I'm like, we're in the we're in a car, we're in this little space together. Can't we talk? There's so much happening in our life. This is the time to get it out. But she'd rather she has a note, a Samsung note. She has a little stylus in her hand, and she's like, boop, boop. Oh, she's got the big one. She's playing her game. Yeah. And I'm like, this is the time where we could talk. And she always says to me, I can't talk to you. You get so frustrated. No, I'm frustrated because it's always on you. You're not talking to me, you're talking around the subject. It's always on you, though. Yeah. That's the thing they do. Let me ask you this thing. Why are women seen as the clean ones and we're seen as the dirty ones? When because here's the thing. They shouldn't be. If you walk into a woman's woman's locker room, if you walk into a woman's bathroom, they are nasty. Now, I've seen some nasty men's rooms. I've been in some gross men's locker rooms, but as a janitor, working, I we used to work for Dunkin' Donuts. Go ahead. When I look at the room, women are fucking disgusting. Women's rooms are the gross, grossest fucking things I've ever seen in my life. And yet we get pegged as the nasty ones. Alright, if I take my underwear off and I throw them and they don't go in the hamper and they're on the floor, that's not disgusting. When a woman takes her nasty bloody frickin' tampon and just throws it in a trash can and leaves it there, that's fucking gross. That's disgusting gross. Okay, let me tell you this. Back in my younger days, when I first started working and stuff, I worked for housekeeping. I worked at uh WVU hospital, old WVU hospital, man. And I was in, I worked in housekeeping for three and a half years. I didn't, I like the job, but I didn't like some of the assignments they gave me. Man, we I hated cleaning women's bathrooms.

SPEAKER_02 28:19

The worst. I went in a women's bathroom one time in the main lobby. As they, you know, they you came in the hospital for the main lobby. I went through that bathroom, man.

SPEAKER_01 28:30

I had they they called me in there because some woman, I don't know what was wrong with the toilet, but she decided to go beside the toilet and crap on the fucking floor. It was a pile of shit this this big on the on the floor. That's nasty. And I had to clean it up. When I worked at Dunkin' Donuts, I came in one morning, right? I'm checking in, I hit the punch clock and everything, and the manager was like, I apologize. That's all he said. I apologize. I'm like, what's going on now? The woman's room is nasty. And I'm like, and I go like this. I go, I know, it is. But here's the thing. I cleaned the men's room, I saved it for last. I cleaned the men's room. Now, men's room wasn't gross, there was toilet paper on the floor. It was the typical men's room that I cleaned up. Right, right, right. Then I opened the woman's room up. Like the men's room was here, the woman's room was here. And when I opened the door, first the smell hit me. I was like, ooh. And as I opened, there was feces smeared on the wall. I don't know what the fuck they've been doing, man. And it was almost like they put their ass on the wall and just let it slide. Like, or they used their hand or whatever. And it was just like, and I remember looking back and I was like, are you kidding me? And my manager was like, honestly, I'm sorry. Now, this was a Dunkin' Donuts that was open 24 hours. So all the drunks, now, this is back in my hometown in Cajos. Okay. Across the street was this place called the OCA. I don't know what the OCA stands for, but it was an association, like a club membership. And they would go drinking there. And then when they were done drinking when the OCA closed, guess where they all went? To the Dunkin' Donuts for coffee and donuts and whatever else. And just hanging. So I got all these drunk bastards hanging out. Now, I've gone to the men's room where there's vomit on the floor, there's vomiting toilet, and I was like, gross. But to see feces smeared on the wall of a woman's room. The women's room. You would think you wouldn't see that shit in the women's bathroom. I'm trying to stretch my legs. Yeah, but women are just so, so gross. In the women's bathrooms, they're disgusting, man. They they leave their shit. They throw toilet paper everywhere. You know what I mean? They they intentionally pin shit on the floor and everything else, man. They're nasty. And now women today. I don't know, the women of today might do it too. That's what I'm saying. The women today are worse than what it was. Because like when I went to Dunkin' Donuts, it was like 25, almost 30 years ago. Like it was 2000, it was 2002. Yeah, when I when I when I that story I told was 1985. It was in the ear it was in the mid 80s, but go ahead. When I worked at the Dunkin' Donuts, it was 2002. So it wasn't even 25 years ago. Okay. So it was like what, 20, 23, 24 years ago? Okay. And it was that nasty. Now, the women today, I've watched these videos of women talking about, I don't need a man this, I don't need a man that, blah, blah, blah, men or this, men or that. But yet the minute something goes wrong, they're like, Well, why didn't you do that for me? Why didn't you do that for me? Why weren't you taking care if if you don't need a man, then why are you asking for men to take care of you? Exactly. I've seen this one, this guy says to this woman, Do you think a man is uh less manly if he can't change a tire? And they're like, Oh, yes, absolutely. Yeah, if he can't change a tire, he's not a real man. So then he goes, Do you think a woman is less of a woman if she can't cook a meal by scratch? And they go, Oh.

SPEAKER_02 32:15

Right? Hey, yeah, that makes sense.

SPEAKER_01 32:19

You said cook? Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Cook what? My man better has six figures. He better look like an Adonis. He bet. Yet meanwhile, they're five foot and nothing. They weigh 200 pounds, and their boobs are hanging out of their shirt, and they're like, I want a man to do this for me. Well, what are you bringing to the table? What are you gonna do for the for this? And then they then what I heard on, like I saw online and everything, they just talk about I am the table. Okay. What exactly does that mean? Yeah. You are the table. So no, you gotta bring something to the table. You're not the table. This is the table. The table is the relationship. You can be the table. What are you bringing to it? Exactly. Exactly. Yeah, the table is. I never heard it put that way before. The table is the relationship. Right. What do you bring into that? And they wanna be the relationship. And they are not the relationship. Yeah, but you but the term like the term um happy wife, happy life, I hate that term. Can't stand it. You know what? We changed it already. Happy house, happy spouse. That's what we were talking about, right? Yep. Yes. Exactly. Happy house, happy spouse. Or happy spouse, happy house. Right. Yeah. Because here's the thing. Yeah. If if if you live by happy wife, you don't have a happy life. You have a quiet life. Well, you're it's one-sided. Exactly. It's one-sided. The woman might be happy. Yeah, but what about you? Thank you. Thank you. See, the man's always left out in stupid shit. Yeah, exactly. No, I'm glad they changed it because I forgot where I even heard it. Well, nobody really changed it. There's no internet trend. I've seen the videos where people say that. You know, I heard this one guy. What did he say? He said, uh, listen to your hubby, you're gonna get a chubby.

SPEAKER_02 34:08

I'm just gonna use it now. I'm just gonna use a number. Oh no.

SPEAKER_01 34:13

But there's a lot of them out there. But from from a long time ago, it was happy wife, happy wife. But to me, that's just a cuckled man. That's let's say your wife says she's not happy unless she's fucking other dudes. Are you gonna let her fuck other dudes to be happy? Happy wife, happy life. No, that's a happy wife with her own happy life. That's what I mean. That's not a happy marriage. Yeah, that's how that means. As long as the wife is happy, she can do anything she wants. You'll have you'll have a happy life. No, If you won't. If you want a happy house, you have to have a happy spouse. Exactly. It goes both ways. Exactly. You know, for all the differences we wrestle with, the misunderstandings, the mixed signals, and the why are you asking me what I want for dinner if my answer is wrong moments. The truth is simple. We're not built to do life alone. Men need women. And women need men. And the friction between us is the same thing that shapes us, softens us, and keeps us growing. As you heard today, we may argue, we may confuse each other, we may even drive each other up the wall. But we also anchor one another. And years from now, when we look back on these days, these stories, these ridiculous little battles, we'll see them for what they really were. Proof that even in chaos, we were lucky enough to have someone walking beside us.

SPEAKER_00 35:49

This has been an MTC original podcast produced by Leo Mainville. Like, share, subscribe, and leave us a five star rating. And thank you for listening.