SPEAKER_00: Titus chapter two.
SPEAKER_00: But as for you, teach what accords with sound doctrine.
SPEAKER_00: Older men are to be sober-minded, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, and love, and in steadfastness.
SPEAKER_00: Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slenders or slaves too much wine.
SPEAKER_00: They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.
SPEAKER_00: Likewise, urge the younger men to be self-controlled, show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching, show integrity, dignity, and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us.
SPEAKER_00: Declare these things, exhort, and rebuke with all authority.
SPEAKER_00: Let no one disregard you.
SPEAKER_00: This is the word of God.
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
SPEAKER_02: That's good.
SPEAKER_02: Little little afternoon lull, right?
SPEAKER_02: Alright, so here I'm already gonna tell you what I love about you.
SPEAKER_02: I love the levity in this in this community.
SPEAKER_02: Like I know you're Irish and so you're quick-witted and have that biting sarcasm that's actually your love language too.
SPEAKER_02: Love and hate language.
SPEAKER_02: I love it.
SPEAKER_02: Uh, but I just here's why.
SPEAKER_02: Because levity is always a byproduct or a fruit of love in the community.
SPEAKER_02: And so it's it's so apparent to me who you love and that God's love is in this place, it's changing your lives and that'll belong to him.
SPEAKER_02: So it's just great.
SPEAKER_02: I love it.
SPEAKER_02: So be encouraged.
SPEAKER_02: Um, that is very evident.
SPEAKER_02: Almost like Titus talks about uh so much about the grace of God has appeared for all people.
SPEAKER_02: Um, you're seeing it amongst you.
SPEAKER_02: When you take that serious, when that when that embraces you, it changes how you live.
SPEAKER_02: So be encouraged.
SPEAKER_02: Um, as I mentioned, 1998 was a crucible for myself and for my family.
SPEAKER_02: I mentioned that our our marriage was, we we saw a different future.
SPEAKER_02: We didn't want to be married to each other.
SPEAKER_02: It wasn't because we hated each other uh or there was infidelity or anything like that.
SPEAKER_02: Um, but we just weren't really trying to embrace what the world was giving us.
SPEAKER_02: We really wanted to believe in God and honor him, and we at the same time, we really wanted to play by the world's rules.
SPEAKER_02: We wanted to claim, we wanted accomplishments, we wanted to acquire things that told people we knew how to live this life.
SPEAKER_02: We wanted that so badly.
SPEAKER_02: And in God's great mercy, I remember that when I lost my job, uh, the airline I was working for happened to go out of business, as airlines do.
SPEAKER_02: And I was praying, Lord, I'm tired of this.
SPEAKER_02: Like, I don't want to live my life anymore in a way where I feel like I'm wasting it and you're not getting any glory and any honor out of it.
SPEAKER_02: I prayed that prayer three months later.
SPEAKER_02: I lost my job and we ended up in Virginia by ourselves.
SPEAKER_02: We were isolated, we have no family.
SPEAKER_02: We're fully on the East Coast by Washington, D.C.
SPEAKER_02: East Coast and West Coast culture is very different.
SPEAKER_02: We didn't like it out there.
SPEAKER_02: We were isolated.
SPEAKER_02: Um, Christy hurt her back when she was taking uh one uh JJ, he was probably five years old.
SPEAKER_02: She was taking him to daycare to go to work, and she fell and hurt her back.
SPEAKER_02: Like I said, we lost our home.
SPEAKER_02: It was tough.
SPEAKER_02: But during that season, this is where God actually met us.
SPEAKER_02: Were we believers?
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I believe we were, but we were walking away very quickly.
SPEAKER_02: And it was during that season, during that suffering, during that pain, during that confusion, during that crucible, is where we met God really for the first time.
SPEAKER_02: That is our testimony.
SPEAKER_02: As he redeemed us, as he as slowly brought our marriage back together, as he put us before his face, as the word of God started to live in our lives again, as the church became a family again, we found ourselves in this community group.
SPEAKER_02: Y'all do community groups?
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, okay.
SPEAKER_02: So we are in a community group.
SPEAKER_02: This community group, however, was led by an 82-year-old widow whose name is Mrs.
SPEAKER_02: Thompson.
SPEAKER_02: Right?
SPEAKER_02: And she she was fantastic.
SPEAKER_02: And she she was that kind of combination of tough and tender, you just don't see in anybody, let alone an 80-plus-year-old widow.
SPEAKER_02: And I remember coming in and she said, How are you doing, Jason?
SPEAKER_02: She had a very deep southern draw.
SPEAKER_02: How are y'all doing, honey?
SPEAKER_02: Something like that.
SPEAKER_02: I said, Well, actually, Miss Thompson, not great.
SPEAKER_02: Like, um, this is hard.
SPEAKER_02: Um, we're going through this really tough season.
SPEAKER_02: We really want to get back home to the West Coast, and I don't know that that's ever going to happen.
SPEAKER_02: Uh, the airline I'm with is gonna take forever for me to like progress up through the stages and make some money.
SPEAKER_02: And I've got a bunch of little kids, and you know, etc., etc., etc.
SPEAKER_02: And so she didn't say a word.
SPEAKER_02: She walked over to her table and she picked up this devotional.
SPEAKER_02: I'm like, oh boy, here it comes.
SPEAKER_02: But she was so sweet.
SPEAKER_02: And she started reading me this little one-page devotion.
SPEAKER_02: She says, I just read this today.
SPEAKER_02: This is for you.
SPEAKER_02: And she said, Do you know how a silversmith purifies silver?
SPEAKER_02: I said, No, Mrs.
SPEAKER_02: Thompson, how does he do it?
SPEAKER_02: She goes, Listen, he puts it into the crucible, into the smelter, and he adds heat.
SPEAKER_02: And as that silver starts to melt, it liquefies.
SPEAKER_02: And then he adds more heat.
SPEAKER_02: And what happens is the impurities in the dross float to the top.
SPEAKER_02: And as they start, as it starts to collect on the top, then he adds more heat.
SPEAKER_02: What that heat does is it burns away this dross, these impurities, these things that are that are getting in the way of the silver becoming truly used.
SPEAKER_02: Do you know how he knows when he's done?
SPEAKER_02: I said, no.
SPEAKER_02: When he burns it so hot, all the dross and the film is off the top, and you can see his reflection perfectly.
SPEAKER_02: The silversmith can see his reflection in the silver.
SPEAKER_02: So that's what God's doing to you.
SPEAKER_02: Like he's adding heat to your life.
SPEAKER_02: Don't run away from it because I know you went out really badly.
SPEAKER_02: Let the silversmith let him burn, and he's gonna burn these impurities out of you, and it's gonna put you in a new position, a new relationship with him, so you can trust him.
SPEAKER_02: This is an 82-year-old woman telling me, you can trust him.
SPEAKER_02: Like my husband died, like my sister lives with me, who's older than me, right?
SPEAKER_02: So, like, we can do this together.
SPEAKER_02: Don't run from the heat.
SPEAKER_02: Change my life.
SPEAKER_02: Like, I never ever forgot that.
SPEAKER_02: Um, this is what God is doing in your life.
SPEAKER_02: I didn't know that.
SPEAKER_02: I kind of figured it, right?
SPEAKER_02: But I needed someone to say, look me in the eyes and say, hold tight.
SPEAKER_02: It's worth it.
SPEAKER_02: Don't give up.
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I know it hurts.
SPEAKER_02: Like, we're not gonna let you die.
SPEAKER_02: Like, here's a baked apple.
SPEAKER_02: She literally gave me a baked apple, which nobody under 100 makes anymore, right?
SPEAKER_02: So I was like, thanks.
SPEAKER_02: Um, but she I needed her voice in my life, it made all the difference to me.
SPEAKER_02: This is what we're talking about.
SPEAKER_02: Now, you may not have anybody who's 82 in your congregation.
SPEAKER_02: No.
SPEAKER_02: So waiting for somebody to say, I'm back here.
SPEAKER_02: It doesn't matter.
SPEAKER_02: You know the family that you need is the family that God has given you.
SPEAKER_02: Right here.
SPEAKER_02: This is who you need.
SPEAKER_02: He is not limited in working through you.
SPEAKER_02: Do you know that?
SPEAKER_02: So you might be in a different age and stage, you might have different ethnicities, you might be further down the road or not as far down the road in your career or school.
SPEAKER_02: And God, by his spirit, will, because he has appeared, he's here, he will work through you to encourage you to train one another.
SPEAKER_02: This is how families work.
SPEAKER_02: So don't miss that.
SPEAKER_02: Uh, we saw in chapter one that the apostle Paul's directions to Titus, because there was chaos in the household of God, was first to install elders that aligned with these basic character qualifications.
SPEAKER_02: The only competency that we can see there was really teaching the Word of God, embracing it and embodying it, letting it live in you so that you can teach it.
SPEAKER_02: But these were all character qualifications, and none of them were remarkable.
SPEAKER_02: They were very, very basic things.
SPEAKER_02: And the reason he sets that up is so that those quote dads of the church can step down, not step up, to lift up the community and thereby also set the pace and the pattern of faithfulness in the household of God.
SPEAKER_02: And then he just pops right through to everyone else, right?
SPEAKER_02: Which includes the elders, but every single one of us.
SPEAKER_02: There's no such thing as a professional Christian.
SPEAKER_02: Leaders are not professional Christians.
SPEAKER_02: He contrasts their simple lives that are adorned with the gospel with those who are self-willed, who are self-sourced in truth, and who are coming to the community to get from them.
SPEAKER_02: Leaders do one of two things.
SPEAKER_02: They either serve you or they take from you.
SPEAKER_02: There is no middle ground.
SPEAKER_02: And for a leader, anything that I don't take from God, I will take from you.
SPEAKER_02: And so you want your leaders, you want your people to be truly in Christ.
SPEAKER_02: Because as we do that, we will learn to stop taking things from one another and serving one another.
SPEAKER_02: And this is the beautiful household that God has made here and wants to grow.
SPEAKER_02: So let's look inside this house a little bit.
SPEAKER_02: The big idea that we're working with is that God's household thrives on a foundation of first true faith.
SPEAKER_02: We understood what that was.
SPEAKER_02: Secondly, irreproachable leaders, but now we're going to look at theocentric servants.
SPEAKER_02: Listen, I had to make it rhyme, right?
SPEAKER_02: T-I-Titus.
SPEAKER_02: But theocentric servants is just this: that you are first belonging to God.
SPEAKER_02: You belong to God, and that will bring you to a position where you can belong to one another as a family.
SPEAKER_02: You're not just a servant in general, you are you're belonging first to God.
SPEAKER_02: So let's understand this and see how this works itself out in the community.
SPEAKER_02: There's three things that a theocentric servant will do.
SPEAKER_02: First, they will embody doctrine.
SPEAKER_02: Notice that it says, but as for you, teach what accords with sound doctrine.
SPEAKER_02: Sound just means healthy.
SPEAKER_02: Doesn't it say teach sound doctrine?
SPEAKER_02: Did you catch that?
SPEAKER_02: Teach what accords with sound doctrine.
SPEAKER_02: In other words, teach your community to live their lives in concert with this sound doctrine.
SPEAKER_02: Let that doctrine not just be something that's abstract, that you embrace in the ether, but something that is worked down into your soul, that's lived out.
SPEAKER_02: Teach them how to live in accordance with sound doctrine.
SPEAKER_02: This is what Titus is called to do.
SPEAKER_02: So embody this doctrine.
SPEAKER_02: Secondly, invest in others.
SPEAKER_02: This is what theocentric servants do.
SPEAKER_02: You are called in this community to invest your life.
SPEAKER_02: And it's hard.
SPEAKER_02: It doesn't always work out perfectly.
SPEAKER_02: And honestly, it's not always rewarded.
SPEAKER_02: Just want you to know that.
SPEAKER_02: It's not always appreciated.
SPEAKER_02: Sometimes the timing's off, but just don't worry about that too much.
SPEAKER_02: Embody doctrine, invest in others, and embrace your place.
SPEAKER_02: Paul always go back goes back to remind us it's not what you do that changes your life.
SPEAKER_02: What you do can never change who you are.
SPEAKER_02: Works can't do that.
SPEAKER_02: But who you are will change what you do.
SPEAKER_02: He reminds us for this reason the grace of God has appeared for all people.
SPEAKER_02: The grace of God that we we belong to that.
SPEAKER_02: So he never lets us get very far in the do before he brings us back to the belief.
SPEAKER_02: Believe this because you belong to the living God.
SPEAKER_02: Believe this because it's by grace that you belong to him, not according to your works.
SPEAKER_02: So embody doctrine.
SPEAKER_02: Um, Paul is exhorting Titus to embody this, to teach this, and to embrace his place along with the rest of them.
SPEAKER_02: First, embody and invest.
SPEAKER_02: And there's a lot of stuff here.
SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna take just a moment, like take some time to pop through all these things that he's calling.
SPEAKER_02: He covers the entire community.
SPEAKER_02: Older men, uh, older women.
SPEAKER_02: Notice he starts there.
SPEAKER_02: Do you know why?
SPEAKER_02: It just makes sense.
SPEAKER_02: Because they're the moms and dads of the church.
SPEAKER_02: Do you understand that?
SPEAKER_02: It doesn't mean that they're better.
SPEAKER_02: It really doesn't.
SPEAKER_02: It just means that they have a little bit more track record.
SPEAKER_02: They have a little bit more time.
SPEAKER_02: Time is also like a crucible, regardless of how good or bad your life is at the moment.
SPEAKER_02: They have a little more runway behind them so that they can lovingly put their arms around other men and women in the community and help them.
SPEAKER_02: So he starts first with the older.
SPEAKER_02: Now, if you are older, I want you to know you've probably learned a hard lesson.
SPEAKER_02: You can't live this life on your own terms.
SPEAKER_02: Man, I've I've tried so hard.
SPEAKER_02: I really have.
SPEAKER_02: I've tried to live for my own comfort.
SPEAKER_02: It is the most boring thing I've ever done.
SPEAKER_02: Truly, right?
SPEAKER_02: This is what we've been discipled to uh culture's taught us this that as you age, you should have more money and less commitments.
SPEAKER_02: It doesn't matter if you're 35 or 45.
SPEAKER_02: Like as you progress in age, our culture is telling us get rid of commitments so that you can be free and live how you want and have as much free cash as possible.
SPEAKER_02: And if you're older, as you grow older, you'll be tempted to escape into things like do you golf, TV, alcohol, or just it's sometimes it's just fun to kill the dreams of younger people, right?
SPEAKER_02: So ha ha that's cute now because our dreams didn't come true.
SPEAKER_02: So uh, but it it's something we we but embrace this fact, embody this fact that you will set the pace and the pattern of faithfulness in this home.
SPEAKER_02: You're like, well, I'm not old.
SPEAKER_02: Well, you're older than somebody here, because I saw a newborn almost.
SPEAKER_02: You're older than somebody here, so don't misplace this because it says older.
SPEAKER_02: You're older than somebody.
SPEAKER_02: You you maybe are a few steps in front of somebody in this community.
SPEAKER_02: So God is gonna call you to embody this doctrine so that your life is being trained by the gospel.
SPEAKER_02: He's gonna call you to invest in someone else and be invested in.
SPEAKER_02: This is part of what we do.
SPEAKER_02: It's normal.
SPEAKER_02: It's what we're called to do.
SPEAKER_02: So let's look at that.
SPEAKER_02: Older men.
SPEAKER_02: You're to be sober-minded, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, love, and insteadfastness.
SPEAKER_02: What is sober-minded?
SPEAKER_02: That means, men, you're to have an unclouded mind that is not growing out of self-centeredness and comfort.
SPEAKER_02: You see things as they are.
SPEAKER_02: Walk away from spiritual inebriation where you see things as you want them to be or as you imagine them to be.
SPEAKER_02: See them truly.
SPEAKER_02: Be sober-minded, dignified.
SPEAKER_02: Men, is your life worthy of respect?
SPEAKER_02: Would somebody five or ten years behind you be motivated to emulate you?
SPEAKER_02: And I'm not talking about what they see right here, I'm talking about what they see when you're at home by yourself.
SPEAKER_02: Because eventually they catch up to one another.
SPEAKER_02: You can mask and hide for a long time, but eventually it will eat you.
SPEAKER_02: So are you dignified, worthy of respect, worthy of emulation?
SPEAKER_02: If your best friend lived like you did, would you be like, all right, you're on it?
SPEAKER_02: We're not perfect.
SPEAKER_02: But even in your intent.
SPEAKER_02: Men, be self-controlled.
SPEAKER_02: This is a main theme in chapter two.
SPEAKER_02: It's a main theme because this is what the grace of God does.
SPEAKER_02: Now, what do we mean by self-control?
SPEAKER_02: Because he calls men, women, older men, uh, younger men, older women, younger women, and even just everybody.
SPEAKER_02: Self-controlled is this it's a strong will.
SPEAKER_02: You should have a strong will, but it yields to the Holy Spirit and a mind that is held captive by God.
SPEAKER_02: Uh, Dr.
SPEAKER_02: Jean, one of my old seminary professors, says this.
SPEAKER_02: Being self-controlled means you have the ability to curb desires and impulses to produce a specific outcome in your life.
SPEAKER_02: Think about how much you've had to sacrifice for education.
SPEAKER_02: Think about how much time you've had to sacrifice to get where you are.
SPEAKER_02: Think about an athlete for a minute.
SPEAKER_02: Think about how much time and energy they've had to put in to just being competitive.
SPEAKER_02: That is being self-controlled.
SPEAKER_02: Think about how high the stakes are for you and for this community.
SPEAKER_02: Not just in danger.
SPEAKER_02: I'm really talking about that.
SPEAKER_02: I'm talking about an opportunity.
SPEAKER_02: If we're not self-controlled, we never get off the block.
SPEAKER_02: Sound in faith, love, and steadfastness.
SPEAKER_02: That is simple spiritual maturity.
SPEAKER_02: Using your experience, your position, your power, your strength to benefit others.
SPEAKER_02: We're called to do that.
SPEAKER_02: And your word is solid.
SPEAKER_02: Amen.
SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna ask you a question.
SPEAKER_02: What breaks your heart?
SPEAKER_02: Like just we'll pull you down into deep depression.
SPEAKER_02: What is that?
SPEAKER_02: For most of us, it could be that we didn't get into the right school.
SPEAKER_02: Um, it could be that I got overlooked for a promotion again.
SPEAKER_02: Maybe it's a relationship.
SPEAKER_02: Maybe my kid didn't get onto the right football club.
SPEAKER_02: We call them soccer teams.
SPEAKER_02: Right?
SPEAKER_02: Just heartbroken.
SPEAKER_02: Paul says in Romans chapter 9, I have great sorrow and unceasing anguish in my heart.
SPEAKER_02: For I wish that I myself were a cursing cut off from Christ for the sake of my brothers.
SPEAKER_02: Let your heart break for the right thing.
SPEAKER_02: Be sober-minded.
SPEAKER_02: Let your heart break for the things of God.
SPEAKER_02: Let your heart embrace and love the things of God.
SPEAKER_02: That's what he's calling you to, men.
SPEAKER_02: That's what he's calling you to.
SPEAKER_02: Older women.
SPEAKER_02: It says in verse 3, older women likewise, that word likewise is used all over.
SPEAKER_02: It means you're not some other category of men.
SPEAKER_02: That means that and this other stuff too.
SPEAKER_02: This means I'm not going to push you categorically away.
SPEAKER_02: We both should embody all these things, but here's some specific things I want the older women to embrace.
SPEAKER_02: They're to be reverent behavior, not slanderous or slaves to much wine.
SPEAKER_02: They're to teach what is good.
SPEAKER_02: What is reverent?
SPEAKER_02: That means you live your life quorum deo before the face of God.
SPEAKER_02: There's power in that.
SPEAKER_02: Remember that your life belongs to God.
SPEAKER_02: You were purchased at a very, very high price.
SPEAKER_02: That's not to make you feel guilty, that's to make you feel powerful and loved and beautiful.
SPEAKER_02: You understand that?
SPEAKER_02: And everything in culture is telling you that you're not.
SPEAKER_02: Reverent, not slanderous.
SPEAKER_02: As we age, it's easy to let go of zeal for God and replace it, as our dreams are broken, with a critical eye towards the younger set.
SPEAKER_02: And just telling you.
SPEAKER_02: And we will complain.
SPEAKER_02: They don't parent like they should.
SPEAKER_02: They don't do that, right?
SPEAKER_02: Can you believe what she's wearing?
SPEAKER_02: Like these things happen.
SPEAKER_02: It's normal.
SPEAKER_02: It's not normal in God's house.
SPEAKER_02: But we're Paul's letting us know these things are where we will drift if we're not holding on to the gospel.
SPEAKER_02: So before you speak, ask yourself, and women speak more than men.
SPEAKER_02: This is this is actually science, right?
SPEAKER_02: About three times.
SPEAKER_02: As many words daily.
SPEAKER_02: Your brain is different than ours.
SPEAKER_02: When a brain is being formed in the room, I have there was a rush of testosterone to actually shut down the two halves of my brain.
SPEAKER_02: They don't communicate as well.
SPEAKER_02: That's not good or bad.
SPEAKER_02: It's just the way that God made us.
SPEAKER_02: So men and women's brains are different in some degree.
SPEAKER_02: Men have, we compartmentalize more because our brains are literally more compartmentalized.
SPEAKER_02: Women are more connectors.
SPEAKER_02: It's just the way God has made them.
SPEAKER_02: So you speak more.
SPEAKER_02: So this just makes sense.
SPEAKER_02: But before you speak, ask yourself.
SPEAKER_02: And this of course applies to all of this.
SPEAKER_02: Is what I'm about to say about this person absolutely true?
SPEAKER_02: I mean, I know for a fact it's true.
SPEAKER_02: Not that you've heard it, you know that it's true.
SPEAKER_02: Does it build them up or tear them down?
SPEAKER_02: And is it really necessary for me to say this?
SPEAKER_02: Is it not slaves to much wine?
SPEAKER_02: You might get the idea as you age that you have put your time in, you have raised your kids, you have finished up with the work world, or at least you've got yourself in the position you need to be in.
SPEAKER_02: It's time to coast.
SPEAKER_02: Alcohol will be your best friend.
SPEAKER_02: Right?
SPEAKER_02: Instead of checking out, teach.
SPEAKER_02: Do you know how much you have to offer?
SPEAKER_02: Well, I haven't made it that far.
SPEAKER_02: Do you know how much you have to offer?
SPEAKER_02: There's a whole line of people behind you that would love it if you would take some time and give them some attention.
SPEAKER_02: It says they are to teach what is good and so train the younger women.
SPEAKER_02: Use your experience, your wisdom, your gifts, your strengths to serve the younger women.
SPEAKER_02: And for the younger woman, it says, let the older women teach you.
SPEAKER_02: I know that there's generational differences.
SPEAKER_02: I know that we irritate, I irritate my kids all the time.
SPEAKER_02: You gotta look past that.
SPEAKER_02: Right?
SPEAKER_02: Just take a moment.
SPEAKER_02: As you get established in life, women, younger women, your temptation will be to import the values of the culture into your life.
SPEAKER_02: Especially when you're younger.
SPEAKER_02: Instead of finding peace, joy, and fulfillment as your status as daughters of the most high.
SPEAKER_02: We've done all this.
SPEAKER_02: I've been through this.
SPEAKER_02: I have two girls, and I have a boy.
SPEAKER_02: And I've seen how this works out, and this is no joke.
SPEAKER_02: It is a fight to the finish.
SPEAKER_02: I will tell you, in my opinion, I don't know how it works in Irish culture, I can tell you in American culture, it is much harder to walk as a woman as it is a man.
SPEAKER_02: Basically, if I'm a dude, if I have some level of success in my job, I'm good.
SPEAKER_02: If I'm a woman, I have to have a career, I have to have an education, I have to have kids, I have to look a certain way, and I'm gonna tell you the clock is running.
SPEAKER_02: And it's no matter what you do or what path you choose, it's never going to be good enough.
SPEAKER_02: You cannot win this battle on your own.
SPEAKER_02: I promise you.
SPEAKER_02: You will not make it.
SPEAKER_02: You need to have women in your corner.
SPEAKER_02: Let them love you, let them guide you, let them disciple you, let them gently correct you.
SPEAKER_02: They don't have to be old, maybe just a little further down the road.
SPEAKER_02: Um, my wife, Christy, is a nurse and she's really good at what she does.
SPEAKER_02: But I see how she operates in the, well, I see how she works in the OR.
SPEAKER_02: Like the younger nurses will come to her.
SPEAKER_02: And she just she was telling me yesterday, oh yeah, we had this phone call, this mandatory management meeting, and they told us, oh, they're gonna split the the operating room into the OR and a cardiac unit and an endo unit, and everybody's freaking out.
SPEAKER_02: They all think they're gonna lose their jobs.
SPEAKER_02: She's like, We're not gonna lose our jobs, right?
SPEAKER_02: Just we'll be okay.
SPEAKER_02: That's part of what older men and women do.
SPEAKER_02: We we've seen it.
SPEAKER_02: Now we're not always right, but we do know it's probably gonna be okay.
SPEAKER_02: And if it isn't okay, it's still okay.
SPEAKER_02: So part of what you do is you help stabilize the community by saying, Yeah, we've kind of bounced off the walls a little bit.
SPEAKER_02: It hasn't always worked out, but you're gonna be all right.
SPEAKER_02: Like, and even if things go sideways here, there's other places to work.
SPEAKER_02: So that's part of how you serve and receive that as a younger woman.
SPEAKER_02: Be so oh, uh, yes, train the young women to love their husbands and children.
SPEAKER_02: Is there any harder or more demanding or rewarding job than this?
SPEAKER_02: You see this?
SPEAKER_02: Love is very difficult.
SPEAKER_02: It's really, as far as scripture is concerned, it's the measure of what you're willing to give for something.
SPEAKER_02: And here's something I can tell you about moms they give a lot.
SPEAKER_02: And they get very little.
SPEAKER_02: You need a posse.
SPEAKER_02: The love that you give to your husband and your children will establish generations of blessing.
SPEAKER_02: Do you understand that?
SPEAKER_02: Be self-controlled and pure.
SPEAKER_02: There is a narrative running through culture for you women, especially younger women, that your value is never exceeds your body, how you look.
SPEAKER_02: I mean, we use sex to sell everything.
SPEAKER_02: Again, I'm speaking of America, but something tells me it's probably similar in Europe.
SPEAKER_02: What that teaches our young women, and I'm talking five, six years old, I've got an eight-year-old granddaughter and a six-year-old granddaughter.
SPEAKER_02: You know what it teaches them?
SPEAKER_02: Your value is what you look like.
SPEAKER_02: Why?
SPEAKER_02: Because we use women's bodies to sell stuff.
SPEAKER_02: It is really hard to untangle that from the minds of women, and it's disastrous.
SPEAKER_02: So don't buy that lie.
SPEAKER_02: You don't no, don't don't buy it.
SPEAKER_02: You are not optimizing your potential by believing that lie.
SPEAKER_02: Don't buy it.
SPEAKER_02: Be self-controlled, be pure.
SPEAKER_02: Your value is not your sexuality.
SPEAKER_02: Working at home.
SPEAKER_02: The literal translation says busy at home.
SPEAKER_02: Here's what this doesn't mean.
SPEAKER_02: It doesn't mean that you can't have a career.
SPEAKER_02: It doesn't mean that you can't work outside the home.
SPEAKER_02: If you synthesize that with what the rest of scripture says, for instance, Proverbs 31, she was a baller, she was a real estate agent, she had a business, right?
SPEAKER_02: She took care of the poor, she took care of her household.
SPEAKER_02: So you you you understand that there's a bigger principle at work here.
SPEAKER_02: She runs vineyards.
SPEAKER_02: Try to keep up with her, man or woman.
SPEAKER_02: Here's what I think this text is pointing at.
SPEAKER_02: Take care of what God has given you instead of looking for fulfillment elsewhere.
SPEAKER_02: Because it's never gonna be good enough.
SPEAKER_02: And your home is primary, and that's not just for the woman.
SPEAKER_02: Don't be lazy and also don't be over busy.
SPEAKER_02: Take care of what God has given you and be satisfied in that, whatever that is.
SPEAKER_02: Uh, for us, for Christy and I, she's worked full-time as a nurse.
SPEAKER_02: She's had seasons where she's quit to just be at home.
SPEAKER_02: She's had seasons where she works part-time, she's shifted to different types of work in the medical industry to align with her priority because she doesn't find her fulfillment in her work.
SPEAKER_02: Nor does she find her fulfillment in being a mom.
SPEAKER_02: But she knows it is what's most important.
SPEAKER_02: It's a priority for her.
SPEAKER_02: And I think that's good.
SPEAKER_02: I think that's godly.
SPEAKER_02: And I had never I had better not get in the way of that.
SPEAKER_02: I had better not explicitly or implicitly tell her that she's not valuable here.
SPEAKER_02: The only thing I need from her is a paycheck.
SPEAKER_02: Be kind and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.
SPEAKER_02: This is not being a doormat.
SPEAKER_02: This is not enduring abuse.
SPEAKER_02: This is choosing to let your husband be a servant leader in your home as God has called him to be.
SPEAKER_02: Holding him accountable and letting him hold you accountable and letting him serve you.
SPEAKER_02: And he's not going to be able to do that unless he has other men in his life.
SPEAKER_02: I'm just going to tell you that.
SPEAKER_02: Men that will hold him accountable to his role and to his call.
SPEAKER_02: This is something that the church can do that no other organization in the world can do, right?
SPEAKER_02: Because we're under authority.
SPEAKER_02: We're under the authority of God Himself.
SPEAKER_02: He calls us to live this way.
SPEAKER_02: He calls men to love their wives as Christ loved the church.
SPEAKER_02: Men, is that unfair?
SPEAKER_02: Just say yes.
SPEAKER_02: It's unfair.
SPEAKER_02: How do you do that?
SPEAKER_02: It's impossible to do that without having a relationship with the living God.
SPEAKER_02: And what I have found is it's impossible for me to do that unless I have other men that are both encouraging me and holding me accountable.
SPEAKER_02: And women are called to submit to men like that.
SPEAKER_02: Again, we misunderstand that.
SPEAKER_02: It doesn't mean that the man makes all the rules, it doesn't mean the man is in charge of everything.
SPEAKER_02: It means that there's respect.
SPEAKER_02: And what it really means is the man takes responsibility for the home.
SPEAKER_02: His job is to make sure that the wife and the children thrive at his expense.
SPEAKER_02: That is how leadership works in the kingdom of God.
SPEAKER_02: You understand that?
SPEAKER_02: It's not I'm on top and you do what I say.
SPEAKER_02: It's I step down, this is Christ, this is his mind, and I lift you up.
SPEAKER_02: You should, this is what it should feel like.
SPEAKER_02: You should feel seen, loved, and just thriving.
SPEAKER_02: And it's really hard.
SPEAKER_02: And our culture tells us it's dangerous and it's stupid.
SPEAKER_02: Younger men.
SPEAKER_02: Paul is expecting Titus to train up younger men in certain things.
SPEAKER_02: And they're really the same things replayed over, but he's going to point at a few different things for you.
SPEAKER_02: Self-controlled.
SPEAKER_02: This covers most of what young men struggle with.
SPEAKER_02: Sex.
SPEAKER_02: It's just something that young men are always going to struggle with.
SPEAKER_02: One of the ways to become a man, I'm speaking of America, so apply it or don't apply it, is a man's not a man until he's sexually conquesting women on a regular basis.
SPEAKER_02: That's manhood, and it's actually being a child.
SPEAKER_02: So we are not going to encourage you to do that.
SPEAKER_02: Paul is saying being self-controlled.
SPEAKER_02: And if you have an issue with that or a problem with that, get around some men that can help hold you accountable.
SPEAKER_02: Let's quit lying to each other that that's not happening all the time, right?
SPEAKER_02: And let's let's pack up and help another walk in self-control.
SPEAKER_02: Quit finding validation in your toys and in your entertainment.
SPEAKER_02: Again, I'll speak of America.
SPEAKER_02: You can't be, you become a man through consumption.
SPEAKER_02: The kind of car that I drive, the kind of school that I went to.
SPEAKER_02: People actually put their university sticker on their cars that they bought that they can't afford with the school degree that they can't, they're still paying off for 50 years.
SPEAKER_02: Is it does anybody, I don't, they probably don't do that here, but does anybody find that crazy?
SPEAKER_02: That's manhood in America.
SPEAKER_02: And it drives me crazy.
SPEAKER_02: Be self-controlled, be a model of good works.
SPEAKER_02: Be an ex hey, young men, don't let your youth limit your faithfulness.
SPEAKER_02: Get in the fight.
SPEAKER_02: There's something better than Call of Duty.
SPEAKER_02: Be an example to this church of faithfulness.
SPEAKER_02: You got a word for us?
SPEAKER_02: Be an example.
SPEAKER_02: He's gonna be an example.
SPEAKER_02: No, but see, it's hard for young men because we don't feel respected.
SPEAKER_02: A man will feel loved, but he will never feel liked.
SPEAKER_02: For women, it's usually opposite.
SPEAKER_02: They will feel liked, but never loved and appreciated.
SPEAKER_02: Men don't let your youth limit your faithfulness.
SPEAKER_02: Be a model.
SPEAKER_02: Um, integrity and dignity.
SPEAKER_02: You are expected to live like older, wiser men, even though you may not have the experience.
SPEAKER_02: Hey, older guys, can we let our younger guys fail and not beat them up for it?
SPEAKER_02: Anybody?
SPEAKER_02: Are we allowed to fail?
SPEAKER_02: You know the way a young man becomes a wise man?
SPEAKER_02: He takes chances and he gets it wrong.
SPEAKER_02: But culture is gonna punish him.
SPEAKER_02: Don't do that here.
SPEAKER_02: Don't punish people for making mistakes or even sinning.
SPEAKER_02: Hold them accountable, let them fail.
SPEAKER_02: Let them fail on the safety of this house.
SPEAKER_02: When we were raising our kids, one of our philosophies was we want to give them as much rope as possible.
SPEAKER_02: If they blow it, I want them to blow it under my house, under my roof.
SPEAKER_02: Because when they get out in the world, the consequences are much more grave.
SPEAKER_02: I might get mad at them, I might take their phone away, I might say, wow, you got drunk at 16.
SPEAKER_02: Okay, so that's not cool.
SPEAKER_02: Let's talk about that.
SPEAKER_02: Let's talk about your relationship with alcohol, let's talk about why you needed to do that at a party.
SPEAKER_02: Five years from now, uh, they might get in an accident as a drunk driver.
SPEAKER_02: So let your men and women fail here.
SPEAKER_02: It's beautiful.
SPEAKER_02: Let them fail under our guard and under our guidance.
SPEAKER_02: That's part of growing up.
SPEAKER_02: Don't punish them.
SPEAKER_02: Proverbs 4-7, young men says, get wisdom.
SPEAKER_02: Write that on your refrigerator.
SPEAKER_02: What's it say?
SPEAKER_02: Two words.
SPEAKER_02: Proverbs 4-7, get wisdom.
SPEAKER_02: Proverbs is great, it embodies wisdom as a person, probably speaking of Christ, but maybe not.
SPEAKER_02: It's funny, wisdom was there at creation, and she calls out and she hails to you.
SPEAKER_02: Hey, come on over here, guys.
SPEAKER_02: I got something to teach you.
SPEAKER_02: Get wisdom.
SPEAKER_02: It goes with everything.
SPEAKER_02: Bond servants.
SPEAKER_02: Again, we talked about this being indentured servitude that was common in the Roman Empire because they conquered the entire world, basically.
SPEAKER_02: So they would have the spoils of the war and they would also take on indentured servants.
SPEAKER_02: You could work yourself out of it, but the point is this in the text, it's not condoning that.
SPEAKER_02: That's not the point.
SPEAKER_02: The point is, this is the lowest form of worker in the empire, paid worker.
SPEAKER_02: So this is for workers.
SPEAKER_02: All of us are gonna be workers, probably at some point in our life.
SPEAKER_02: So how do we, like, how do we do this?
SPEAKER_02: How do we go outside the house?
SPEAKER_02: Well, we're to be submissive to our own masters.
SPEAKER_02: Do you feel like that?
SPEAKER_02: Do you walk into work and say, I'm gonna be submissive to my manager today?
SPEAKER_02: Has anybody ever done that?
SPEAKER_02: Johnny's like, I've never done that.
SPEAKER_02: We don't think that way.
SPEAKER_02: That is a gospel mindset.
SPEAKER_02: You know why you can do that safely?
SPEAKER_02: Because your boss is not on the throne.
SPEAKER_02: Submissive to their masters and everything to be well pleasing.
SPEAKER_02: In other words, your actual your intent is actually to serve.
SPEAKER_02: You're not argumentative, that's condemning.
SPEAKER_02: Not stealing, wow, but showing all good faith.
SPEAKER_02: Remember, Jesus has appeared, so we're showing this off.
SPEAKER_02: So that in everything, we spoke about this earlier, we may adorn, we may wear the doctrine of God our Savior, not just on the retreat, not just in church on Sunday, but even when we go into work, we're putting that on, right?
SPEAKER_02: We're adorning the righteousness that Christ gave us.
SPEAKER_02: We're seeking to live in holiness because Christ has come.
SPEAKER_02: We are called to embody this and invest in one another.
SPEAKER_02: This is a game changer.
SPEAKER_02: That the word of God may not be reviled.
SPEAKER_02: One of the best apologetics to Dublin is gonna be this family.
SPEAKER_02: How do we live?
SPEAKER_02: What can young people do here?
SPEAKER_02: Are they encouraged?
SPEAKER_02: Are they like entitled?
SPEAKER_02: Or do they seek to be holy and to be an example?
SPEAKER_02: Do older folks pour into them or do they ignore them?
SPEAKER_02: It's like, no, I gotta get mine.
SPEAKER_02: I can't worry about who's behind me.
SPEAKER_02: Do you as we as we grow in wealth and in status, which is good, do we use it to coast or do we use it to raise up the next generation?
SPEAKER_02: Do we raise up a next generation and give them a home so that the city can multiply and multiply?
SPEAKER_02: And there can be outposts of the kingdom of God all over this area so that people can have the same experience that you had.
SPEAKER_02: That maybe some of these kids that are in strollers right now, they're ready.
SPEAKER_02: And maybe there's there's a church in their part of the city, so they're ready to go.
SPEAKER_02: That's embodying this doctrine, that's investing in their future because we are seeing Jesus.
SPEAKER_02: We're seeing.
SPEAKER_02: And he is seeing in our home.
SPEAKER_02: So theocentric servants, first and foremost, and all of this is hard.
SPEAKER_02: Nobody's off the hook on this.
SPEAKER_02: That's the way we got to serve one another.
SPEAKER_02: Theocentric servants understand this is a household.
SPEAKER_02: They embody this gospel, they invest in one another, and they also embrace this.
SPEAKER_02: This is the gospel power.
SPEAKER_02: A lot of times Paul gives it first, but in this book he pops it around sometimes.
SPEAKER_02: He's like, do all this stuff.
SPEAKER_02: You're like, I can't.
SPEAKER_02: I'm good.
SPEAKER_02: You're understanding it right then.
SPEAKER_02: You need to embrace your place in God's household.
SPEAKER_02: Listen to this.
SPEAKER_02: After saying all this in verse 11, he says, For, in other words, because knowing this, understanding this, all these hard things, knowing this, the grace of God has appeared.
SPEAKER_02: Past tense, bringing salvation for all people.
SPEAKER_02: All people, every tribe, every tongue, every nation.
SPEAKER_02: And not just the grace of God in information.
SPEAKER_02: Remember?
SPEAKER_02: It's not just a mantra.
SPEAKER_02: It's a person, it's not just a principle.
SPEAKER_02: It's a person it's Jesus.
SPEAKER_02: He's appeared in the flesh.
SPEAKER_02: Jesus is not asking us to do anything that he hasn't done.
SPEAKER_02: And he's not asking us to do anything in our own power.
SPEAKER_02: That's what the false teachers are doing.
SPEAKER_02: You can do this on your own.
SPEAKER_02: You can find a way to justify yourself on your own.
SPEAKER_02: God is not asking you to do that.
SPEAKER_02: He will give you everything that you need.
SPEAKER_02: For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, training us, teaching us to renounce ungodliness, worldly passions, to live all of a self-controlled, so that we're willing to push down or reject some desires that feel natural to us to embrace a higher desire.
SPEAKER_02: And not doing it alone, but doing it with our team, with our family.
SPEAKER_02: Training us to live self-controlled, upright, godly lives now in this present age.
SPEAKER_02: Not only that, we're waiting for our blessed hope, the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior, Christ Jesus.
SPEAKER_02: So it's not that he, not this, this, that he's appeared already.
SPEAKER_02: He's coming back bodily.
SPEAKER_02: He's coming back in the flesh.
SPEAKER_02: It's gonna be personal, he's gonna be here personally, bodily, and it's gonna be glorious.
SPEAKER_02: We stand here looking back at what he's done and holding on to what he's going to do.
SPEAKER_02: You will, all this stuff you'll be rewarded for.
SPEAKER_02: This is crazy.
SPEAKER_02: Do you understand that?
SPEAKER_02: That Jesus comes back with nothing but a reward for you.
SPEAKER_02: You're like, well, I didn't do it very good.
SPEAKER_02: Well, neither did I.
SPEAKER_02: But that's how grace works.
SPEAKER_02: Grace covers our sin, and in his mercy, he rewards our faith.
SPEAKER_02: He gave himself up for us to redeem us from all lawlessness and to purify for himself a people for his own possession who are zealous for good works.
SPEAKER_02: This is what God has called us to.
SPEAKER_02: I will tell you this.
SPEAKER_02: If you embrace this, if you're willing to embody this, if you're willing to invest in one another, if you're willing to take the gospel at face of value with this level of seriousness, nothing can stop you.
SPEAKER_02: Nothing.
SPEAKER_02: Who's gonna come against this and succeed?
SPEAKER_02: Not even yourself.
SPEAKER_02: You're like, I'm not very strong, I'm weak.
SPEAKER_02: Well, there's other people in here that aren't in that area.
SPEAKER_02: And you're gonna be strong in an area that somebody needs that as well.
SPEAKER_02: You know what I found out that Betty was right, Mrs.
SPEAKER_02: Thompson.
SPEAKER_02: Not only was she right, not only did God burn these lesser loves out of our lives, not did he burn the faithlessness and my anxiety out of us.
SPEAKER_02: Not only did he teach me how to walk as a husband and as a brother and as a father, he used that pain and that crucible for me to encourage other people.
SPEAKER_02: So even the things you suffer are just gonna be just gold.
SPEAKER_02: It's fruit for you.
SPEAKER_02: You get to bring glory to God by helping one another out.
SPEAKER_02: You can't do that if unless you're in serious relationships with people.
SPEAKER_02: You can't do that outside of a family.
SPEAKER_02: 2 Corinthians 1 says, Blessed be the God and the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, the God of all comfort, who comforts us in our affliction so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we have been comforted by God.
SPEAKER_02: We can do that.
SPEAKER_02: Even the stuff we suffer, he's not doing it to you.
SPEAKER_02: We're walking through it.
SPEAKER_02: And he will use it to bless other people.
SPEAKER_02: God's household, this church, is gonna thrive first on true faith.
SPEAKER_02: A gospel that is not nuanced, that is not diluted, that is all the way, which is the gospel you hear.
SPEAKER_02: It's gonna be thriving as it grows on irreproachable leaders.
SPEAKER_02: Men and women that embody the gospel in their lives, not perfectly, but seriously, and theocentric servants, men and women who have given their lives to God and are willing to walk and embody this gospel and to invest in one another and to be invested in.
SPEAKER_02: And to embrace their place, not based on what they've done or what their family's done or where they've come from or where they're going or where their school is or their education level is, but on this simple fact the grace of God has appeared.
SPEAKER_02: You know what grace is?
SPEAKER_02: Grace is not God saying, I know you tried, I'm gonna lower the standard for you, you can get in.
SPEAKER_02: He's not pushing the rope down so you can hop over it into heaven.
SPEAKER_02: Do you understand that?
SPEAKER_02: Grace, he does not lower the standard at all.
SPEAKER_02: Otherwise, he would not be a good God.
SPEAKER_02: He meets the standard.
SPEAKER_02: Do you see that?
SPEAKER_02: He meets it in the righteousness of Christ.
SPEAKER_02: He meets it with Jesus Himself living a normal life with brothers and sisters in the flesh, with a job in the flesh, with friends in the flesh, living a life that led him to a public execution that wasn't just that.
SPEAKER_02: It was the force of God's wrath.
SPEAKER_02: And walking out of the tomb, which means the door to heaven is kicked open for you, for all people.
SPEAKER_02: He's the God you serve.
SPEAKER_02: And he has everything that you need.
SPEAKER_02: He will forgive your sin, he'll empower your life, and he's the great, high, good brother, right?
SPEAKER_02: He's the older brother that leads our family.
SPEAKER_02: So I would just ask you that this is good stuff.
SPEAKER_02: How do you guys feel about Titus?
SPEAKER_02: Does it hit you?
SPEAKER_02: Is it hard?
SPEAKER_02: Just be honest.
SPEAKER_02: But are you encouraged that the hard things that God calls us to in family, He also equips us to?
SPEAKER_02: He can do that.
SPEAKER_02: Two questions.
SPEAKER_02: Who are you investing in?
SPEAKER_02: Here.
SPEAKER_02: Who are you investing in?
SPEAKER_02: And also who's investing in you?
SPEAKER_02: Those are two questions we need to answer.
SPEAKER_02: Right?
SPEAKER_02: Who has access to your life?
SPEAKER_02: It doesn't have to be everybody.
SPEAKER_02: Some of us are overshares.
SPEAKER_02: It doesn't have to be everybody.
unknown: Right?
SPEAKER_02: You don't have to stand up at communion group and say everything that you did last week.
SPEAKER_02: Right?
SPEAKER_02: Who is investing in your life?
SPEAKER_02: And who are you investing in?
SPEAKER_02: Ask that question.
SPEAKER_02: Answer that question.
SPEAKER_02: This is how God is going to continue to build you guys into a rock solid outpost of his kingdom.
SPEAKER_02: Let's pray.
SPEAKER_02: Lord, we thank you, we praise you that you don't call us to high holy things to see if we will succeed and then and then determine if we will be your daughters and your sons and your heirs.
SPEAKER_02: You don't do that.
SPEAKER_02: You yourself pay our debt, make us rich, give us yourself, make us your heir, and then call us to walk as your family.
SPEAKER_02: That is the gospel.
SPEAKER_02: Let us embody that.
SPEAKER_02: Let that truth go deep into our souls.
SPEAKER_02: Let that truth come out of our lives.
SPEAKER_02: Let us invest in one another, in this family.
SPEAKER_02: And because we will forget it every day and every week, let us embrace our place in this home because it is by grace that we are saved through faith.
SPEAKER_02: And that is all to your glory.
SPEAKER_02: We pray this in the name of Jesus.
SPEAKER_02: Amen.
SPEAKER_01: If you found this helpful or want to know more about City Church Dublin, please visit our website found in the link below.