WEBVTT 00:00:19.359 --> 00:00:21.039 Well, good afternoon, everyone. 00:00:21.120 --> 00:00:31.760 Uh, nothing like a uh a good, simple, straightforward, uncontroversial passage uh as we gather together on a Sunday, particularly if you are new or visiting. 00:00:31.920 --> 00:00:34.640 Uh uh if you are new or visiting, my name is Mark. 00:00:34.719 --> 00:00:41.520 I'm one of the leaders here at the church, and uh we are coming up on our this is our penultimate week in the book of Colossians. 00:00:41.600 --> 00:00:45.439 We'll finish it next week just in time for our uh church weekend away. 00:00:45.600 --> 00:00:47.679 Uh more information about that at the end. 00:00:47.840 --> 00:01:14.480 Uh clearly uh there are uh some controversial uh things here, and so uh we will uh I will speak for about half an hour, 35 minutes or so, and then we'll have uh questions, any questions that you may have uh either uh from the text or arising from anything that I have uh said, so that we can just uh drill into it a little bit more and clarify some of the uh the things that are going on here. 00:01:14.560 --> 00:01:18.079 But why don't I pray uh and ask for God's help? 00:01:22.560 --> 00:01:38.159 Our Father, we do ask for the help of your Spirit now as we come to your word to see uh with clarity your truth and to see also in it the goodness of it. 00:01:38.879 --> 00:01:52.640 Will we see the goodness of how you have so ordered your world that we might live in a way that pleases uh the Lord Jesus and commends him to a watching world? 00:01:52.959 --> 00:01:55.120 We ask these things for his sake. 00:01:55.439 --> 00:01:56.079 Amen. 00:01:57.519 --> 00:02:01.040 This passage is uh one of a couple of passages like it. 00:02:01.120 --> 00:02:03.920 It has sister passages uh throughout the New Testament. 00:02:04.079 --> 00:02:08.240 Ephesians 5 uh might be a uh a common one that some of you may know. 00:02:08.400 --> 00:02:10.400 Wives submit to your husbands. 00:02:10.479 --> 00:02:14.560 Uh husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her. 00:02:14.800 --> 00:02:31.039 1 Peter 3 as well, and these passages in Colossians uh 3, 18 to uh 4.1 are passages that to our modern hearers just make us uh wince slightly, let's be honest about the kind of bristle. 00:02:31.599 --> 00:02:43.840 Uh talk of submission, uh, talk of uh the translation that was read said says bond servitude, but other translations will say slavery, thinking about slavery there. 00:02:45.120 --> 00:02:52.080 It's the kind of passage that um you wish wasn't being preached when your non-Christian friend accepts the invite to come to church. 00:02:52.240 --> 00:02:54.400 Uh, if that's you this morning, welcome. 00:02:54.639 --> 00:03:00.960 Um we just go through books of the Bible, and this just happened to be the next passage. 00:03:02.479 --> 00:03:04.080 But here's the thing. 00:03:04.319 --> 00:03:08.479 Here's the thing about this passage and passage like uh passages like it. 00:03:08.719 --> 00:03:16.800 It goes to a really uh important issue for us, and that is the question of how is it that we actually relate to one another? 00:03:17.520 --> 00:03:23.680 Because that's not altogether clear in our world. 00:03:24.319 --> 00:03:37.199 I feel like our parents and grandparents had a uh had a more obvious set of uh rules as to what define rules and how we related, and and and yet they've changed. 00:03:37.919 --> 00:03:48.479 They maybe haven't been passed down, or they've changed in a way that isn't immediately perceptible in the world of Me Too and council culture and all of those things. 00:03:48.560 --> 00:04:04.560 And so it is worth considering what the Bible's mind is on these questions, even if right now you don't agree with this way of relating, it at least exposes the question of how should we relate? 00:04:05.199 --> 00:04:18.000 How am I supposed to function in those relationships that are closest to me, in my marriage, in how I parent or will parent in the future, how I act in the workplace. 00:04:18.160 --> 00:04:29.600 I'm gonna make the case that uh the bond servant, uh, bond servitude or slavery in this case it translates most uh mostly to our our world of work a little bit later on. 00:04:31.279 --> 00:04:37.040 And we live in a in a web of interconnected relationships. 00:04:37.279 --> 00:04:49.120 Some of us uh occupy uh each of these roles, uh spouse, parent, and either employee or employer. 00:04:49.439 --> 00:04:58.399 And we have to kind of uh move through those uh those different uh iterations, through those different relationships. 00:04:58.560 --> 00:05:03.279 And so how do we make sense of each of them in the matrix of our lives? 00:05:04.399 --> 00:05:11.120 All of them, it is worth saying right at the start, are governed by what Paul has said earlier. 00:05:11.360 --> 00:05:42.000 What God has said, uh what Paul has said uh earlier in chapter three about putting off our old self with malice and envy and and self-love and hatred and uh and and competition and put on other person-centered love, put on peaceableness and forgiveness and compassion, that all of those things have to be true for us, or are they governing principles before we even look at the details of husbands and wives and parents and children and work? 00:05:44.639 --> 00:05:50.399 I know that the first five words, wives submit to your husbands. 00:05:50.800 --> 00:05:56.240 The first five words of this passage might not make you want to know more about this passage. 00:05:58.160 --> 00:06:11.680 But I want to make a number of observations before we even get there to help us understand by way of context just how revolutionary what Paul is talking about here really is. 00:06:11.920 --> 00:06:13.360 Let me give you a number of surprises. 00:06:13.519 --> 00:06:19.759 Let me give you four surprises from this text before we even look at the various dynamics, okay? 00:06:19.920 --> 00:06:20.879 First surprise. 00:06:21.040 --> 00:06:33.920 Surprise number one is that Paul elevates those who would have had lower status in the ancient world by addressing them first, by giving them priority. 00:06:34.240 --> 00:06:47.759 Paul elevates the status of the wife, the child, and the slave, the bondservant, by speaking to them first, with priority. 00:06:48.240 --> 00:06:52.240 That would have been completely unheard of in the ancient world. 00:06:52.399 --> 00:06:55.920 In the ancient world, there existed things called household codes. 00:06:56.079 --> 00:06:57.120 That's what this is. 00:06:57.439 --> 00:07:00.160 It's basically how do you manage your house? 00:07:00.240 --> 00:07:03.279 And it was written primarily for men. 00:07:03.920 --> 00:07:13.199 It was written primarily for husbands, fathers, and masters as to how they would or should run a good and orderly Roman household. 00:07:13.839 --> 00:07:25.199 And it was written primarily to them because your wife and your child and your slave were all to varying degrees seen as property to be owned by you. 00:07:25.680 --> 00:07:29.759 In fact, Aristotle said that slaves were human tools. 00:07:30.800 --> 00:07:44.399 Paul completely explodes that, he completely cuts against it by addressing the wife, the child, and the slave as full human beings with rational faculties who can consider what is being said. 00:07:44.560 --> 00:07:49.279 He gives them dignity by saying, this is the kinds of things that you should be doing. 00:07:50.240 --> 00:08:01.120 And the very fact that you sit here and that's not revolutionary, you should think, well, of course, women, children, and my employees have dignity. 00:08:01.279 --> 00:08:14.879 The very fact that you think that is an indicator that you are swimming in the water, culturally speaking, that Paul has made here in the New Testament. 00:08:15.439 --> 00:08:18.959 Because it would have been revolutionary in the ancient world. 00:08:19.279 --> 00:08:40.320 The fact that it's not to our ears now just shows us how steeped in Christian values our culture actually is, that we regard women of equal status and value, children of equal status and value, our employees of equal status and value. 00:08:42.159 --> 00:08:45.120 Paul addresses them before he addresses the men. 00:08:46.000 --> 00:09:01.279 He is recognizing that they are image bearers of God with wills of their own, that they are in fact part of God's kingdom, and that women and slaves, and I dare say children as well, were being used by God all over the empire. 00:09:01.440 --> 00:09:03.279 There are examples of that in the New Testament. 00:09:03.360 --> 00:09:08.720 You have examples of Phoebe, a woman who is sent with the letter to the Romans. 00:09:09.039 --> 00:09:17.679 Anesimus, who we'll maybe talk about a little bit later, who was a slave, who was used by God and part of Paul's apostolic band. 00:09:19.200 --> 00:09:20.720 That's the first surprise. 00:09:21.039 --> 00:09:25.120 Paul elevates them by addressing them first. 00:09:25.679 --> 00:09:38.399 The second surprise here, again, contrary to the household codes of the day, is that the men here, the husbands, the children, and the masters, are never told to enforce submission. 00:09:40.240 --> 00:09:41.440 Do you see that? 00:09:43.039 --> 00:09:49.440 It's not husbands or wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. 00:09:49.600 --> 00:09:52.159 Husbands, make sure that you keep your wife in line. 00:09:53.360 --> 00:09:53.679 No. 00:09:55.039 --> 00:09:56.480 Husbands love your wives. 00:09:57.440 --> 00:09:59.360 Do not be harsh with them. 00:10:00.320 --> 00:10:10.320 This idea of enforced subjugation or servitude is foreign to the mind of the Bible. 00:10:12.480 --> 00:10:25.759 Men are never given a command or a mandate to enforce their power, to enforce their authority over their wives. 00:10:30.960 --> 00:10:36.639 In the household codes, it was about keeping people in line, it was about ensuring that people obeyed. 00:10:38.559 --> 00:10:40.399 Paul won't have any of that. 00:10:40.720 --> 00:10:44.559 He looks to the man of the house and says, Love your wife. 00:10:44.879 --> 00:10:46.240 Don't be harsh of them. 00:10:46.960 --> 00:10:48.639 Don't provoke your children. 00:10:49.120 --> 00:10:53.600 And remember, for one, that you have a master in heaven. 00:10:56.559 --> 00:10:57.759 Third surprise. 00:10:59.759 --> 00:11:03.440 The man is not Lord of the Household, Jesus is. 00:11:08.720 --> 00:11:11.600 Again, completely antithetical to the Roman world. 00:11:11.679 --> 00:11:23.919 If you were a Roman male, you had an immense amount of freedom to treat people of a lower social status than you, however you wanted. 00:11:24.480 --> 00:11:34.399 You could have sex with whoever you wanted if you were a Roman male, regardless of their age or gender, as long as they were of a lower status than you. 00:11:34.960 --> 00:11:37.600 You were the Lord of all you surveyed. 00:11:38.320 --> 00:11:39.759 Paul says no. 00:11:40.399 --> 00:11:56.879 Because in each of these each of these groupings that he addresses, the wife, the child, the slave, and the master, he points out that all of their obligations are ultimately to Jesus. 00:11:58.159 --> 00:11:59.120 Do you see that? 00:11:59.440 --> 00:12:01.200 Wives submit to your husbands. 00:12:01.360 --> 00:12:02.799 What's the motivation? 00:12:03.200 --> 00:12:05.200 As is fitting in the Lord. 00:12:05.759 --> 00:12:08.080 Verse 20, children obey your parents. 00:12:08.240 --> 00:12:08.720 Why? 00:12:08.960 --> 00:12:11.120 For this pleases the Lord. 00:12:12.399 --> 00:12:16.320 Slaves are to work with sincerity of heart. 00:12:16.720 --> 00:12:23.440 End of verse 22, fearing the Lord, working hardly, verse 23, as for the Lord. 00:12:23.679 --> 00:12:38.159 And the masters, and I take here the masters are, it's really a catch-all, that they are also fathers and husbands, that they have a master in heaven. 00:12:39.200 --> 00:12:51.600 Taking these things together, no man, either here or in the first century receiving this letter, can sit and conclude that he is the lord of his own little domestic empire. 00:12:52.320 --> 00:12:58.320 With everyone around him living to serve his whims and will. 00:12:58.799 --> 00:13:02.159 Christ alone is the ultimate authority over the home. 00:13:02.240 --> 00:13:06.559 He is the one who governs the relationships that we find ourselves in. 00:13:06.720 --> 00:13:09.519 He is the lord over that entire matrix. 00:13:09.679 --> 00:13:10.559 Do you see? 00:13:15.360 --> 00:13:28.559 And the fourth and final surprise, before we look at uh the three dynamics particularly, is to just think a little bit further about submission. 00:13:30.320 --> 00:13:38.399 Because to our ears, submission means a diminishing or denigration of value. 00:13:39.200 --> 00:13:47.600 That if I am the one who is submitting, if I am the one who is following, then I am making myself lesser. 00:13:47.840 --> 00:13:52.720 I am acknowledging that I am of lesser value or worth. 00:13:54.639 --> 00:13:58.720 That is not how the Bible views submission. 00:13:59.679 --> 00:14:03.039 That is not submission in the Bible's mind. 00:14:05.279 --> 00:14:08.639 And we know this because of how God is. 00:14:10.559 --> 00:14:18.159 Christians believe that our God is one in three persons, Father, Son, and Spirit. 00:14:19.759 --> 00:14:24.480 And within that community, there is hierarchy. 00:14:25.039 --> 00:14:28.960 The Father sends the Son, and the Son goes. 00:14:29.120 --> 00:14:34.559 You read John 5, Jesus says, I speak what the Father has given me to speak. 00:14:34.639 --> 00:14:37.840 I do the actions that He, I do the works that He has given me to do. 00:14:38.720 --> 00:14:43.200 There is a sending and a going, an authority and a submission. 00:14:44.399 --> 00:15:00.960 And yet in Christianity there is no sense that Jesus, the second person of the Trinity, is lesser, of lesser value, lesser in being, lesser in terms of dignity or worth. 00:15:03.919 --> 00:15:06.320 And we are made in the image of that God. 00:15:08.159 --> 00:15:13.120 We are made in our relationships to reflect something of that sort of God. 00:15:14.799 --> 00:15:17.759 And Paul is showing us this here. 00:15:18.720 --> 00:15:24.639 There is no denigration or lessening of value in submission. 00:15:25.200 --> 00:15:27.679 So what is the Bible's definition of submission? 00:15:27.840 --> 00:15:29.840 Let me offer one for you. 00:15:31.600 --> 00:15:41.440 Biblical submission is one equal person's voluntary acceptance of the authority of another equal person. 00:15:42.159 --> 00:15:43.440 Let me say that again. 00:15:43.679 --> 00:15:54.000 Biblical submission is one equal person's voluntary acceptance of the authority of another equal person. 00:15:57.919 --> 00:16:06.879 Given all of that, let's make some comments about each of these three pairings, as it were. 00:16:08.879 --> 00:16:11.039 Let's think a little bit about wives and husbands. 00:16:11.360 --> 00:16:15.039 Verses 18 and 19 wives submit to your husbands as is fitting in the Lord. 00:16:15.200 --> 00:16:20.080 Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them. 00:16:22.639 --> 00:16:39.759 First, it is important to recognize that here and in all of the other passages that speak to this sort of relationship dynamic, submission and leadership are expressions of what it means to worship God. 00:16:42.000 --> 00:16:54.080 The wife voluntarily, joyfully submits to her husband as an act not to make his socks roll up and down and make him happier, but because it pleases the Lord. 00:16:54.240 --> 00:16:56.559 It is part of her own discipleship. 00:16:56.720 --> 00:17:07.759 In the same way that for the man to lovingly give himself in sacrificial service of his wife is part of what it means for him to worship the Lord. 00:17:14.160 --> 00:17:15.519 Second in this one. 00:17:16.960 --> 00:17:26.400 Where authority is godly and loving, submission is the fitting and appropriate response. 00:17:26.720 --> 00:17:34.319 Because you might sit here and you think, well, does that mean that a wife has to do whatever whatever is asked of her? 00:17:34.640 --> 00:17:35.839 You really suggesting that? 00:17:35.920 --> 00:17:36.880 No, I'm not. 00:17:37.359 --> 00:17:45.200 Because again, all of these relationships are governed by what Paul has said before about putting off sin and putting on holiness. 00:17:46.400 --> 00:17:58.240 If you are asked as a wife to do something that that rule to act in a way that runs in direct contravention to what God has already explicitly said in his word, you have no obligation to submit. 00:17:58.559 --> 00:18:01.599 Because your first obligation is not to your husband, but to Jesus. 00:18:01.680 --> 00:18:02.480 Do you see? 00:18:04.000 --> 00:18:17.599 But where your husband seeks to lovingly lead in a sacrificial, humble way, submission is an appropriate response. 00:18:20.559 --> 00:18:25.519 It is the right response when a husband is seeking to lovingly lead his wife. 00:18:28.559 --> 00:18:32.319 You see, the authority of the husband is a derived authority. 00:18:32.400 --> 00:18:36.079 It doesn't come from him, it comes from God. 00:18:37.359 --> 00:18:41.839 And so a wife's joyful submission is not primarily about him. 00:18:46.880 --> 00:18:48.960 It's about how she worships her God. 00:19:00.480 --> 00:19:06.160 Does Paul expect that husbands will say jump and wives will respond, hi hi, darling? 00:19:08.720 --> 00:19:09.039 No. 00:19:11.279 --> 00:19:14.480 Remember, Paul is elevating their status in society. 00:19:14.640 --> 00:19:31.440 He is treating them as intelligent human beings with wills of their own who are capable to understand and respond and work out what the dynamic of submitting and following and and uh sorry following and leading uh looks like. 00:19:34.480 --> 00:19:37.200 And so I take it that there is an invitation to dialogue here. 00:19:37.359 --> 00:19:40.240 Should should couples talk about things? 00:19:41.200 --> 00:19:43.519 Talk about decisions that you might make in your life. 00:19:44.480 --> 00:19:45.119 Yes. 00:19:48.319 --> 00:19:52.559 That husbands uh come in and with some papal edict. 00:19:52.720 --> 00:19:59.039 Thus says me, wife, I have so decreed uh that this is the decision that we're taking. 00:19:59.119 --> 00:20:00.880 Uh and so a pack of bags, let's go. 00:20:01.039 --> 00:20:01.680 No, no. 00:20:02.400 --> 00:20:06.720 Should you seek to come to a compromise, to come to an agreement? 00:20:07.119 --> 00:20:08.640 Yes, of course. 00:20:11.279 --> 00:20:17.359 Can a wife cultivate her own intelligence and still be a submissive wife? 00:20:17.920 --> 00:20:18.559 Yes. 00:20:20.079 --> 00:20:31.920 Can a wife be a formidable character in the world of work and other spheres and still be a submissive wife? 00:20:32.720 --> 00:20:33.359 Yes. 00:20:34.799 --> 00:20:42.880 Can a wife pursue excellence in her chosen field and still be a submissive wife? 00:20:43.599 --> 00:20:44.240 Yes. 00:20:45.599 --> 00:20:55.680 None of these things preclude submission because submission isn't primarily about creating a power imbalance or an intellectual imbalance. 00:20:56.000 --> 00:20:59.519 No, leading and following is about love. 00:21:01.440 --> 00:21:05.039 It's about love, first and foremost, to Jesus. 00:21:05.519 --> 00:21:18.160 It's about recognizing that Jesus loves you as a wife or as an aspiring wife, and in that context, recognizing that Jesus doesn't give you commands that aren't for your good. 00:21:21.200 --> 00:21:27.599 But it is also recognizing the love that your husband has and should grow in for you. 00:21:29.599 --> 00:21:32.319 Is your husband, will your husband be perfect? 00:21:32.640 --> 00:21:32.960 No. 00:21:33.599 --> 00:21:34.880 Will he fail you? 00:21:35.119 --> 00:21:35.599 Yes. 00:21:35.839 --> 00:21:38.000 Will he fail to lead you rightly? 00:21:38.240 --> 00:21:40.079 Yes, he probably is will. 00:21:40.720 --> 00:21:52.319 But where he is seeking to grow in godliness, where he is seeking to love Jesus more, and as a consequence lay down his life for you. 00:21:54.799 --> 00:21:58.880 Where you can say, I know that my husband loves me. 00:22:01.759 --> 00:22:10.799 In that context there can be greater trust together and a following, a joyful following of his leadership. 00:22:11.920 --> 00:22:18.799 If he's prepared to lay down his life for you, would you not follow him? 00:22:21.359 --> 00:22:22.960 Children and parents. 00:22:26.880 --> 00:22:27.920 Sorry, verse 20. 00:22:28.079 --> 00:22:31.279 Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. 00:22:31.359 --> 00:22:33.279 Again, see the Godward motivation of it. 00:22:33.599 --> 00:22:34.480 Verse 21. 00:22:34.640 --> 00:22:39.519 Fathers, do not provoke your children lest they become discouraged. 00:22:40.799 --> 00:22:43.279 Provoke, you mean can mean embitter? 00:22:44.000 --> 00:22:46.160 Do not provoke or embitter your children. 00:22:46.319 --> 00:22:49.200 And the motivation, the reason for that is given there. 00:22:49.359 --> 00:22:49.839 Why? 00:22:50.160 --> 00:22:54.160 So that they might not become discouraged. 00:22:54.400 --> 00:23:01.759 So the reason for our uh our unprovoking parenting is that our children mightn't become discouraged. 00:23:01.839 --> 00:23:02.799 Now, what does that mean? 00:23:02.960 --> 00:23:19.440 Because in the in the day-to-day to and fro of uh of parenting, I can uh I can promise you uh that uh that my children find themselves discouraged from time to time uh when they want to eat cake for breakfast, and I say no, they find themselves discouraged. 00:23:19.519 --> 00:23:20.559 I have discouraged them. 00:23:20.720 --> 00:23:28.160 So if I contravene Colossians 3.20, uh when I just so should I just give them however much cake they want to eat, right? 00:23:29.599 --> 00:23:42.480 I take discouragement here to mean a uh an ongoing spiritual discouragement, a disillusionment with Jesus and the gospel, a loss of hope in the gospel. 00:23:44.319 --> 00:23:55.279 Again, we could spend a whole sermon series, uh, and we should do at some point, reflecting on uh on what it means not to provoke your children so that they don't become discouraged. 00:23:56.640 --> 00:23:59.839 But it's worth reflecting on a few things uh briefly. 00:24:00.000 --> 00:24:07.599 I recognize that uh that many, if not most, here, um were not parents yet. 00:24:07.839 --> 00:24:11.359 Um yet, let's let's let's file this one away. 00:24:11.440 --> 00:24:19.359 Let's let's bed this in so that when we can activate it, it becomes uh uh it becomes useful to know. 00:24:20.720 --> 00:24:25.839 The first is to acknowledge that when it says verse 20, you know, uh obey your parents in everything. 00:24:25.920 --> 00:24:43.279 You know, this obedience in everything again is tempered by all that Paul has already said in chapter 3 about putting off sin and putting on holiness, turning aside from cruelty and malice and envy and hatred. 00:24:43.440 --> 00:24:58.400 And so this is not a license for cruel or abusive parenting that should and must be rooted out and dealt with. 00:25:01.119 --> 00:25:23.440 But it is also worth knowing that when we remind our children to obey, and say you find yourself reminding your child to obey, that we remind them not just because it's what makes us happy or what makes our day easier. 00:25:24.880 --> 00:25:30.000 We must remind our children that the motivation for their obedience is because it pleases Jesus. 00:25:31.759 --> 00:25:37.119 It pleases the Lord that they should listen to their mum and dad. 00:25:40.799 --> 00:25:45.119 If we don't do that, then we we run the risk of becoming moralists. 00:25:46.720 --> 00:25:57.599 Divorcing um uh divorcing uh obedience from any sort of uh love that might exist between children and their God. 00:25:58.160 --> 00:26:01.920 They obey because it pleases the Lord. 00:26:05.359 --> 00:26:18.480 It's important also to recognize that each parent fails at this and will fail at this. 00:26:21.279 --> 00:26:27.519 Can I say if you're a perfectionist, it's gonna be really, really hard for you when you become a parent. 00:26:28.480 --> 00:26:35.839 Because you spend your entire life second guessing every decision you've ever made and uh thinking that you're going to ruin your child. 00:26:38.559 --> 00:26:40.640 That is why grace is so important. 00:26:41.200 --> 00:26:44.720 And grace is important for each of these relationship dynamics. 00:26:45.599 --> 00:26:56.319 Husbands and wives, your wife will not follow you the way you the way you would think that she should, and you will not lovingly lead her the way that you should either. 00:26:56.720 --> 00:27:09.519 You will not parent perfectly, your children will not obey perfectly, you will not work perfectly, and your boss, in case you hadn't realized it, won't be perfect either. 00:27:11.519 --> 00:27:21.039 In the context of the Christian community, it is so good that we remember our need of grace. 00:27:23.279 --> 00:27:30.559 If you divorce all of these relationship dynamics from the gospel, what is the gospel? 00:27:30.720 --> 00:27:46.640 The gospel is the is the good news that Jesus came to die for our failings, our self-love, and our sin, and has given us grace upon grace, and he's given us a new heart with which to live. 00:27:47.759 --> 00:27:55.680 You take that and separate that from submitting and obeying, all you will get is moralism. 00:27:58.960 --> 00:28:03.920 Or you will become crushed by your failings. 00:28:04.960 --> 00:28:07.519 Grace is vital here. 00:28:10.400 --> 00:28:15.920 And just finally on this one, just some reflections on how we can avoid uh discouraging our children. 00:28:18.559 --> 00:28:21.440 Four quick things that come to mind. 00:28:23.359 --> 00:28:27.519 You can avoid discouraging your children when you apologize when you're wrong. 00:28:32.960 --> 00:28:43.440 You ever live in that family where uh if there is a problem between two people, umbody says sorry. 00:28:44.720 --> 00:28:57.519 What happens is that there is this kind of there's tension, and then there's passive aggression, and then there's just kind of and a slight uneasiness, and then there's just a resolve just to continue on. 00:28:58.799 --> 00:29:02.400 And that's how your relationship dynamics just kind of work forever and ever. 00:29:04.640 --> 00:29:06.640 Where nobody says sorry. 00:29:07.200 --> 00:29:28.640 We will fail our children as parents, and we'll won't it commend the gospel of grace to them when you knowing that you have acted wrongly, get down on your honkers, on your haunches, and look at your child in the eye and say, I'm sorry. 00:29:28.960 --> 00:29:31.200 I shouldn't have spoken the way that I did. 00:29:31.440 --> 00:29:33.279 I flew off the handle. 00:29:33.759 --> 00:29:35.279 Would you forgive me? 00:29:41.519 --> 00:29:42.160 Wow. 00:29:44.400 --> 00:29:47.599 I'm just glad that you recognized that it was Ezra, not me. 00:29:51.920 --> 00:29:55.200 Apologize when you're wrong, father, mother. 00:29:55.759 --> 00:29:59.680 Second, have consistent and clear boundaries. 00:30:02.799 --> 00:30:11.039 I know that that's hard because sometimes you just want your children to go away for five minutes. 00:30:11.680 --> 00:30:22.799 And so in that in that time, you would happily uh let them do something that otherwise, when you're more engaged, um they uh they shouldn't do, and you wouldn't let them. 00:30:22.960 --> 00:30:29.440 And so you move the goalposts and you bend and you flex, but then you're more engaged and you're more awake, you say, No, you can't do that thing. 00:30:29.519 --> 00:30:30.960 Well, I just did it like yesterday. 00:30:31.200 --> 00:30:32.160 Why did you let me do it then? 00:30:32.240 --> 00:30:33.759 And now you're changing the goalposts. 00:30:34.079 --> 00:30:37.359 It's a way to exasperate your your children, right? 00:30:37.599 --> 00:30:42.480 And like I have two children under the age of four years old. 00:30:42.559 --> 00:30:43.359 Like, I understand. 00:30:43.440 --> 00:30:46.400 Like sometimes they just need to be outway from me. 00:30:46.640 --> 00:30:55.599 Um, but where that leads me to not be consistent and not be clear in my boundaries, that is something for me to repent of. 00:30:57.359 --> 00:31:02.799 The third way that you could not provoke your children is be proportional in your level of discipline. 00:31:05.039 --> 00:31:08.480 We don't want to use a canon to crack a nut. 00:31:09.599 --> 00:31:17.359 There is a concern here later on in this passage for masters, employers to act with justice and fairness. 00:31:17.599 --> 00:31:21.839 There should be justice and fairness in how we do discipline as well. 00:31:24.319 --> 00:31:38.880 But beyond all of these things, I think that the most important way that you can not discourage your children is if you are happy in God. 00:31:41.359 --> 00:31:58.079 If you are delighting in Jesus and in your faith, and your children see it, and they see that you're the same here, then you are at home, and they see that Jesus really is Lord of our house. 00:31:58.240 --> 00:32:02.960 And that changes how we live, that changes how mom and dad relate. 00:32:06.400 --> 00:32:12.559 Your children will be less discouraged in God if you yourself are happy in him. 00:32:15.200 --> 00:32:20.160 Finally, slaves and masters, and then we'll take some questions. 00:32:21.039 --> 00:32:26.799 Even mentioning uh the word slavery uh throws up images in our mind. 00:32:27.839 --> 00:32:32.880 It throws up images in our mind of the transatlantic slave trade, right? 00:32:34.559 --> 00:32:41.200 Of that evil, wicked, racist practice. 00:32:43.200 --> 00:32:45.599 That practice of people stealing. 00:32:45.839 --> 00:32:50.240 The Bible never condones people stealing. 00:32:53.759 --> 00:32:55.920 That is not what is going on here. 00:32:57.680 --> 00:33:05.680 Slavery in the ancient world was, first of all, not race-based. 00:33:07.039 --> 00:33:19.200 There are plenty of instances in antiquity of uh North African Roman citizens, so black in color, who had Caucasian white slaves. 00:33:19.759 --> 00:33:22.880 I know you don't sit there and go, ah, great, well, that's fine then. 00:33:22.960 --> 00:33:29.680 You I know that's not a knockdown argument, but at least see that it's not a race-based thing. 00:33:30.640 --> 00:33:34.720 Slaves in the ancient world had a standing within society. 00:33:34.880 --> 00:33:38.799 They could, at various points, uh, own property. 00:33:39.119 --> 00:33:50.000 It was a uh it was also not a permanent estate, but a way of often paying off economic debt, after which time they would have their freedom. 00:33:50.559 --> 00:33:52.160 That is not a suggestion. 00:33:53.039 --> 00:33:55.839 Therefore, therefore, we're all okay with slavery. 00:33:56.480 --> 00:34:00.640 That's not what we're saying, and that's not what the New Testament is saying. 00:34:00.880 --> 00:34:04.960 It is not that we now suggest that slavery is a positive thing. 00:34:05.279 --> 00:34:06.240 Far from it. 00:34:06.480 --> 00:34:14.559 We are simply recognizing, one, that it was different to the transatlantic slave trade, and that it was a reality of life in the ancient world. 00:34:14.960 --> 00:34:19.760 Might not be a preferable one, but it was a reality of life in the time when Paul was writing. 00:34:19.920 --> 00:34:21.840 You might think about it a little bit like this. 00:34:22.239 --> 00:34:23.920 Think about fossil fuel. 00:34:24.480 --> 00:34:29.599 Our world, your life, is completely dependent upon fossil fuel. 00:34:29.920 --> 00:34:33.920 Our economy is completely dependent upon fossil fuel. 00:34:35.360 --> 00:34:41.840 But most of us here would like to lessen our dependence upon fossil fuel. 00:34:41.920 --> 00:34:47.760 We think that that would be a good thing over the long term for the world and the planet. 00:34:49.199 --> 00:35:01.599 And yet most of us also recognize that it's not something that we can just end like that, that it's something that we must work towards and continue to subvert. 00:35:03.679 --> 00:35:08.880 In the ancient world, slavery was a little like that. 00:35:11.840 --> 00:35:19.199 To have an ancient society without slavery would have been unthinkable and impossible to achieve overnight. 00:35:19.360 --> 00:35:34.880 And yet, the New Testament, in Paul's writings in particular, he so subverts the culture of how slaves and masters interact that it sows the seeds of abolitionism. 00:35:35.920 --> 00:35:38.559 It sows the seeds of the end of slavery. 00:35:38.719 --> 00:35:47.199 I would encourage you to, uh, at some point, uh, maybe this afternoon, you might take 10 minutes, to sit and read Paul's letter to a guy called Philemon. 00:35:47.360 --> 00:35:48.639 It's one page long. 00:35:48.719 --> 00:35:55.280 And Philemon was a master, he was a slave owner, and he had a slave whose name was Onesimus. 00:35:55.360 --> 00:35:57.920 And Onesimus ran away. 00:35:58.320 --> 00:36:06.320 They were both Christians, but for a slave to run away carried with it a capital offense. 00:36:06.559 --> 00:36:10.239 You could be put to death if you were a runaway slave in the ancient world. 00:36:10.480 --> 00:36:15.360 And Paul writes to Philemon, he says, So you imagine it. 00:36:15.760 --> 00:36:18.960 Anesimus ends up in Paul's troop. 00:36:19.360 --> 00:36:21.519 He says, You need to go back to your master. 00:36:21.679 --> 00:36:25.920 And so he pens a letter and he puts it in Anesimus' hand and says, Go home. 00:36:26.159 --> 00:36:27.840 Go home to your master. 00:36:28.239 --> 00:36:34.159 And in that letter, he says, Receive Anesimus back like a brother. 00:36:36.719 --> 00:36:40.239 Don't exact any sort of retribution. 00:36:40.559 --> 00:36:41.840 Receive him like a brother. 00:36:42.639 --> 00:36:45.440 Any debt, charge it to my account. 00:36:56.719 --> 00:37:07.920 I think the way that this uh translates most readily for us is how we interact within our employment. 00:37:08.800 --> 00:37:19.760 You might uh consider your employment as some form of indentured servitude, especially if you work for some government organization. 00:37:21.119 --> 00:37:26.480 It and in this context, Paul encourages the Christian worker in a number of ways. 00:37:26.559 --> 00:37:27.679 What is it he says? 00:37:28.000 --> 00:37:29.199 Verse 22. 00:37:30.239 --> 00:37:40.079 Slaves obey uh obey in everything those who are your earthly masters, not by way of eye service as people pleasers, but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord. 00:37:40.239 --> 00:37:48.400 Whatever you do, work heartily as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive an inheritance as your reward. 00:37:48.639 --> 00:37:51.519 You are serving the Lord Christ. 00:37:54.079 --> 00:38:02.639 You, in your work as an employee, are not just working for your boss. 00:38:04.719 --> 00:38:07.679 You are working for the Lord Christ. 00:38:08.719 --> 00:38:10.719 You are working for Jesus. 00:38:12.400 --> 00:38:23.440 Second, you are not just working for your own career advancement, but for the reward that you will receive on the last day. 00:38:26.400 --> 00:38:31.679 With that in mind, therefore, you should work even when your boss isn't looking. 00:38:31.920 --> 00:38:35.599 You should work with excellence even when your boss isn't looking. 00:38:35.840 --> 00:38:39.679 Not simply so that you might get a promotion quicker. 00:38:40.400 --> 00:38:49.599 Because that would to do that simply for that reason would be to work by way of eye service as a as a person pleaser. 00:38:51.360 --> 00:39:02.880 It can be a great consequence of hard work, but to work simply for that is to lose sight of the greater Christian motivation to work with excellence because you are working for God. 00:39:04.000 --> 00:39:10.960 It is part of what it means for you to worship in the workplace. 00:39:15.440 --> 00:39:30.320 And where you are an employer, where you have people on your team over whom you have authority, justice and fairness are key. 00:39:33.199 --> 00:39:47.039 How often can those who are in authority, perhaps even also those who are in authority in leadership positions within the church become merciless? 00:39:51.039 --> 00:39:55.599 We must all recognize that we have a master in heaven. 00:39:59.840 --> 00:40:20.719 In all of these things, and with this we conclude, in all of these things, whether it's leadership, loving, submission, parenting, obedience, work, management, all of these things, what we see is a call for us as Christians to integrate the message of Christianity, the gospel, into every into every area of our life. 00:40:21.039 --> 00:40:32.880 The gospel affects how you live, how you love, how you work, how you manage your household, how you bring up your children, what you do with your money. 00:40:33.119 --> 00:40:42.400 It is so easy just to see Christianity as your ticket to ride when you die, your insurance policy for a better and eternity. 00:40:42.559 --> 00:40:47.199 But to think of it that way would be a misunderstanding of what the gospel is. 00:40:47.840 --> 00:41:01.119 In the gospel, Jesus is making a new society, he is making a kingdom where we live differently, we love differently to the world around us. 00:41:01.440 --> 00:41:11.199 And when we do that, we show the beauty of the gospel and the God who is God of the gospel. 00:41:13.360 --> 00:41:24.719 Our Lord Jesus is the one who willingly went, submitted himself to the Father's will, even when that meant death for us. 00:41:26.880 --> 00:41:30.239 He is the one who loves his bride, the church. 00:41:30.719 --> 00:41:33.440 He never abuses his power. 00:41:33.760 --> 00:41:38.400 He is never unjust, he is never unfair. 00:41:41.119 --> 00:41:47.599 And when we live in these sort of ways, we show his character and his beauty.