I Said Fifty

In tonight's episode, Shane is struggling with complicated feelings about Ilya after watching an interview of his 'rival' ahead of their first hockey game against each other. 

Cast:

Shane Hollander: Megan
Ilya Rozanov: Tiffany Langston
Yuna Hollander: Michele
David Hollander: Melissa Kuser
Reporter 1/Announcer 1: Alison Spencer
Reporter 2/Announcer 2: Kiran Gupta

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Welcome to Radio Rivalry, the podcast for loons, by loons, that asks, what if Heated Rivalry was a 1920s-style radio play with music and sound effects, where each episode is a different scene (or two) from the Heated Rivalry limited series and each episode features a different cast of wolfbirds? 

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:11

This is Radio Rivalry, a production for Loons by Loons. The title of tonight's episode is I Said Fifty, starring Shane Hollander, Ilya Rozanov, Yuna Hollander, David Hollander, Reporter 1 and Announcer 1. Reporter 2 and Announcer 2. Our scene opens with Shane at home watching an interview with Ilya on his cell phone.

SPEAKER_05 0:50

How are you feeling about finally getting to Montreal tomorrow?

SPEAKER_00 0:54

Good. About time.

SPEAKER_05 0:56

Are you looking forward to beating Shane Hollander?

SPEAKER_00 1:00

He is goalie now, yes.

SPEAKER_06 1:03

Hey Ilya, at the beginning of the season, you said you were gonna score 40 goals your rookie season. Are you still feeling like that's gonna happen?

SPEAKER_00 1:11

No, no. I never said 40 goals. Is lie. Liar told you that. I said 50.

SPEAKER_03 1:21

What a fucking asshole.

SPEAKER_01 1:29

Ah. Sorry I'm late. It's 15 minutes. Don't even worry about it. No, we don't care.

SPEAKER_04 1:37

It's just that you're usually on time.

SPEAKER_03 1:39

Yeah, my workout went longer than expected. And then I got lost on this YouTube rabbit hole.

SPEAKER_04 1:44

It's fine. I ordered for you. Salmon brown rice? Okay, so I have very exciting news. What's YouTube? Rolex is in. Wow. Let me pull up the email. And I quote, Shane is exactly the kind of young athlete and young man that Rolex wants to be associated with. He's smart, he's serious, he's handsome. That's an understatement. Oh god mom. And we believe he will be hockey's most significant ambassador in a generation. Is Rolex on YouTube?

SPEAKER_03 2:22

YouTube is like a video portal site.

SPEAKER_01 2:25

I'm not convinced I know what any of those words mean.

SPEAKER_03 2:29

So a rabbit hole is where you watch a video, and then it keeps recommending other videos, and you just keep clicking on them. Sounds dangerous.

SPEAKER_04 2:37

Oh yeah, I go down those rabbit holes all the time.

SPEAKER_03 2:40

Of course you do, Mom.

SPEAKER_04 2:41

What was yours about?

SPEAKER_01 2:43

Fancy watches? David. What? I'm just keeping up.

SPEAKER_03 2:49

Unlike the animals becoming friends, like uh a tiger and a bear, a cow and a duck. Come on. Yeah, snake and a baby.

SPEAKER_01 2:58

Ah, I'd watch that. What you should be watching are the ones about hockey. I think keeping up with that snake and baby sounds pretty important. That relationship could go pretty sideways.

SPEAKER_04 3:11

Oh, I saw a link today about Ilya Rosanoff. So I click on it and he says, Well, first of all, do you remember at the beginning of the season he told someone, uh, I can't remember who. Anyway, he told them that he was gonna score 40 goals. Do you remember that?

SPEAKER_01 3:27

I remember you yelling something about Rosanoff turning 40 and me trying to match your level of outrage.

SPEAKER_04 3:34

Well, yesterday in Boston, he said he meant 50, 50 goals. Um, yeah, he's an asshole. Yeah, the nerve. Fuck him. I'm sorry, but I mean it. Okay, imagining he's better than you? Fuck him right up the butt. You nah! I'm sorry, but I said it.

SPEAKER_05 3:54

Honestly. Deja Day talking to McCann and St. Pierre. It's probably the last face-off of the game. Who are they sending in? This crowd seems to have some ideas.

SPEAKER_07 4:12

Are they gonna do this? Are they gonna give the people what they want? Deja Day. Gonna give it to them. Is Riley gonna do this too? Are we gonna see? Listen to that crowd.

SPEAKER_05 4:26

And there you have it. It's Ilya Rubinoff versus Shane Hollander.

SPEAKER_00 4:34

Will you disappoint them? Nope. And scene.

SPEAKER_02 4:44

I'm Megan, and tonight I played Shane Hollander. You can find me on threads and TikTok at ephemeral quiet at E-P-H-E-M-E-R-A-L Q U I E T.

SPEAKER_04 4:59

I'm Michelle. Tonight I played Una Hollander. You can read my one and only fan fiction at AO3 under Nova underscore dog.

SPEAKER_01 5:11

I'm Melissa Cooser. Tonight I played David Hollander. I'm a naturopathic doctor in Portland, Oregon, specializing in menopause and gender affirming care.

SPEAKER_05 5:22

I'm Alison Spencer. Tonight I played Reporter 1 and Announcer 1.

SPEAKER_06 5:27

I'm Karen Kupta. Tonight I played Reporter 2 and Announcer 2. You can find me on threads at Kirintara, K-I-R-A-N-T-A-R-A, mostly posting about Connor's story. And if you're looking for heated rivalry magazines, I am your girl.

SPEAKER_00 5:44

I'm Tiffany Langston. Tonight I was the understudy for Ilya Rosanoff. I'm also the creator, director, and producer of Radio Rivalry. You can find me on Threads, Instagram, and Blue Sky at TiffLangston. That's our show. Please rate and subscribe wherever you download or stream awesome podcasts. You can find us online at Radiorivalry.com, across social media at Radio Rivalry Pod, and you can send us an email at Radio Rivalry at gmail.com. We'll be back soon with a whole new scene and a brand new cast. Until then, we'll catch you at the cottage.