Your Words Can Kill-Matthew 5:21-32

Your thoughts, words and actions are determined by the condition of your heart.  How can you open your heart to the power of the Holy Spirit and not let anger fester into hatred?  Join Rev. Dr. Aimee Copley Mulder in this discussion of living a life that attempts to see every person as someone created in the image of God.

Transcript

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Oh, glory to God. This is Amy Copley Mulder. We are completing Matthew chapter five this morning, and the topic your words can kill. Join me.

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Doesn't matter if you're rich or doesn't matter if you're young or alive. Often matters if you answer the doorway, just go to change your life. Give it up to God. All the way to God.

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All glory to God. This is Amy Copley Mulder, and we're continuing our discussion on Matthew 5. And as I was reading through and just trying to think about, Lord, what do you have to say to us through the scripture I've read many times in different pieces and chunks? I just thought it could all be summed up in the statement, your words can kill. Because we speak what's in our heart and our thoughts. Your thoughts matter for what your words are and your words and actions. He's really trying to give us a blueprint for how to get along together. And let's be honest. Life with people is a mess box. It is a messy, challenging thing. I have people in my home that I love that I would throw myself in front of a bus for them to be okay and they irritate me. It's a messy situation. You know why? Because we're all people. So if you're like me and you live life with people, unless you're a lighthouse keeper and God go with you on that lonely journey. But if you're like me and you live life with people and you're trying your best to say, Lord, what do you have for me? And to follow Jesus with everything you have, it is going to be irritating. Because people are a mess. And you're a mess. But praise the Lord when we come to Jesus in Matthew 5 and this collection of teachings that he gave to many people in many different settings. We know it's a valid set of teachings because of how many manuscripts have this teaching in Matthew 5 represented. But we are listening to Jesus and He's saying, Your thoughts and words and actions matter. And you know that words can kill. You have been on the receiving end of some words that just shocked you or changed your life or remolded something you thought about yourself because somebody gave an opinion that you didn't know was there. So we all know that words can kill. You have heard it was said to those of ancient times, you shall not murder, and whoever murders shall be liable to judgment. But I say to you that if you are angry with a brother or sister, you will be liable to judgment. And if you insult a brother or sister, you will be liable to the counsel. And if you say you fool, you will be liable to the hell of fire. That's Matthew 5, 21 and 22. Jesus is not mincing words. He's saying, it is not enough just to not murder someone. You have to make sure that when you are looking at people, when you are interacting with people, that you recognize and know to the core of who you are, that that person is created in the image of God. And that is an easier said than done situation. It's very easy to say, I'm created in the image of God, and every person that I deal with and I'm irritated with is created in the image of God until they become a mess or they have hurt your feelings or they have wounded you. And Jesus is saying that anger that leads to hatred is a problem. You have got to get that out of you. It's not like Jesus is asking us to deny anger. He's saying when anger happens, you need to make sure that you are not sinning against a brother and sister. And he goes on in 23. So when you are offering your gift at the altar, if you remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother or sister, and then come and offer your gift. Come to terms quickly with your accuser while you are on the way to court with him. Or your accuser may hand you over to the judge and the judge to the guard, and you will be thrown into prison. Truly I tell you, you will never get out until you pay the last penny. So there's a lot here about emotions and anger and what and what we can know. What is happening here is Jesus is instructing, commanding us to be peacemakers. It's not enough to just keep the peace and know that somebody has a problem with you and you just kind of go on your merry way and try to avoid them. No, Jesus is saying, listen, when your brother and sisters get you angry and you have to go to them and reconcile, Jesus is in the business of his followers, the ones that are called his disciples, being ones who reconcile. Now that's challenging because sometimes people don't want to reconcile with you. Sometimes your best intentions are not seen well. And you know, sometimes this peacemaking, like the full reconciliation, doesn't happen. But Jesus isn't really talking about results where he's saying, as for you who are following me, go and attempt and work hard to be a peacemaker. And if you don't, if you don't go try to reconcile, then when you're trying to give an offering at the house of worship, it's invalid. It's really important here when we're trying to follow what Jesus says to realize the action is with us. And Jesus is basically saying your actions should be a reflection of who I am, the peacemaker of all. Now, Jesus goes on and talks about adultery and divorce. As we talk about this, I just want you to think about are my thoughts circumcised or on point with what Jesus has for me, or do my thoughts need some remodeling? If you are continually thinking about what so-and-so has, what so-and-so has done to you, if a wound that someone's given you is constant in your mind and you've been unable to let go in that sea of forgetfulness, of forgiveness, if that is your situation, be honest with yourself that you need some remodeling of your thoughts today before your words become angry and your actions can kill. But the exciting thing is that Jesus has left us the Holy Spirit to constantly teach us, instruct us, and mold us. And all we have to do is be open to the Holy Spirit filling each part of our words and actions. So let's go on to verse 27 to verse 32. And this is talking about adultery and divorce. So after I read the scripture from Matthew 5, 27 through 32, after I read the scripture, I will talk to you a little bit about some cultural things, but just keep that in mind about your thoughts and words and actions. You have heard that it was said, you shall not commit adultery. But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust in has already committed adultery in his or her heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one of your members than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one of your members than for your whole body to go into hell. It was also said, whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce. But I say to you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for the ground of unchastee, causes her to commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery. So these words that Jesus says are pretty plain speaking. And what people have used this for is they have taken these words that Jesus is talking about in a cultural thing and talked about divorce in kind of a bludgeoning way, like Jesus said this, and this is what it must mean. So I just want to make sure that before we get to divorce and adultery, that we understand the situation. It is very true that Jesus is saying, it is better for you to get rid of anything that's going to cause you to lust in any way and cut it out. Get rid of it. And I love that Jesus is talking about thoughts here. He's saying, like, you're not doing something doesn't mean that you're you're not thinking about it or your heart is not wanting what is not yours. And he's really talking about what men and women do with objectifying each other as either like for women, maybe it's the provider or the money, or you know, maybe it's body parts, and for men it's body parts. Um, just objectifying anyone and not seeing them in the image of God is not okay. And you may not be in this lustful period of your life where where you're looking at someone as a thing of body parts, but you may be reducing someone that you encounter as the one thing or their worst quality. And Jesus is saying, just like he said about for murder, you are not to do that. You are to look at every person as a creation of God. And you can keep going in this world and give everyone the benefit of the doubt. And you can keep going in this world and live in the fact that every person, no matter what they have done to you or done in general, is a creation of the living God. And you do not need to reduce anybody in order to live life with them. Living life is messy, it causes a lot of reorienting our mind and thoughts. And Jesus is saying, you need to ask yourself about you. Are you reducing people to their worst thing or their dumbest word? Are you reducing people to just what they can do for you? That's using people, that's not looking at people as God's creation. And Jesus is saying, you need to cut these things out. Now, on the lusting piece, we as in a culture, we have a really big challenge with the phones being in our hands. And that's why if you have kids, if you have, I have older teenagers, so they do have phones, just make sure that your kid knows that you're gonna search their phone history. Make sure that that backdrop is there. Because we need to help our kids not be in this dark hole of like a digital addiction or pornography. Um, that's how that's our piece of cutting it out. I don't think we can just say you can't have a phone in life, you know. But if your kid is misusing that phone, of course, but I've these phones are here to stay. So we have to ask ourselves, how do we work in digital addiction? You know, we're not gonna just teach our kids to type on a typewriter, we're gonna have them use a computer. So, how do we put stops and how do we make sure that our life is not getting sucked into this dark den of lust? We can't cut off computers and phones at this point, but we can make sure, even me, that may make sure that I have accountability with those things. I was looking at my weekly screen report and it told me I spent last week three hours playing this one game. Are you kidding me? I I wasted my time that much. Now it's cumulative, but still it's kind of disgusting. So I told my boys, hey, this happened and I want to be, I want you to be with me, boys, and we're gonna check and make sure that my my time is less spent on this dumb thing. We can find ourselves being very, you know, very captured by the technology around us. And Jesus is saying, whatever is going into your mind that's helping you not see people as the image of God, you need to get rid of it, it needs to be limited in your life. And then when Jesus talks about divorce, it's really important to understand about this, what this piece is. It has the same thing to do with the adultery piece. What would happen in the day is women did not have a lot of options for um employment. Um, they were very dependent on who they married and their families. And really, women were at a huge disadvantage economically. So men would be like, oh, well, this woman isn't doing what I want. I'm gonna divorce her and go with the younger one, or divorce her and go and, you know, even have many wives. And so what happened is Jesus is saying, you need to honor the people that you are married. Do not just willy-nilly divorce everyone, because that's kind of what was happening. It was kind of a rampant part of that. And he's saying, you need to honor this commitment now that you've made. Now, today a divorce happens. We know that divorce can be just a really, it's a really upset in the family. I will tell you, the younger generation is just not getting married. You know, they're buying homes together without having this the same name, you know, legally. What's happening for everyone is there's a big shift in what does it mean for divorce and that kind of thing. But the bottom line is these men were divorcing the women back in Jesus' day, and the women were left without any devices of supporting themselves. They really had to, it really put them in a lower situation on every front, their on social status and economically. So since that happened, it was those men not honoring the women as anything but what they gave them. And he's saying, no one is your property, no one is, no one is beneath you. You need to honor every person as a creation of the living God. And then Jesus goes on to say, I really think, and we will finish up with oaths and retaliation next week at the end of chapter, this is Matthew 21 through 32. It is about this relationship with people. There's nothing that causes more anger than our relationships with people, but recognizing your words can kill and your thoughts and actions matter. We want there to be fairness in the world. And when we're dealing with people, a lot of our issue is really this um covetousness commandment. I think what we have to recognize is this human characteristic that we want everything to be fair, and life is not fair. You know this intellectually, but as you look around the world, you're like, well, why is this person not this? Why is this person out this? Why is she doing good? Why is he doing good? We have this way, and every time you reduce a person to the set of their circumstances, you are dehumanizing that. You are not creating an image of God perception of that person. And when we do that, we are coveting. So here's the situation. You are in your life, you're in your situation, and you look over at so-and-so, and they seem to have it all together, or you're looking at a person as their provision or their body parts, or they're, you know, you're you're kind of wanting something that they have or a circumstance they have. That's lusting, that's adultery. That's that's looking at someone, and it could looking at someone with really disobeying the commandment of do not covet what your neighbor has. Appreciate what you have been given. And that's the truth. Your words can kill. But the thoughts that need to be beautiful in your life, the thoughts that need to keep growing, the thoughts that need to be beautiful in your life are the thoughts where you look around at what you have and you say, Thank you, God, for that. Devin and I have made a choice that we are not gonna have a home equity loan to fix up all the stuff in our house. We've been here 15 years with three teenage boys. There is so much stuff that needs to be fixed, and it's not little fixes, it's like$20,000 here,$20,000 there. We have a solid house. We are gonna invest in some more paint for the cosmetic stuff, but we really need like all new cabinets and all new upstairs bathroom. I mean, we really do. And then I look around and I go, Well, we've made this choice to not get more money loaned to us. So we're gonna be okay. We're gonna make it work with what we have, and we're gonna wait until we can pay cash for those things. Maybe that makes sense. So that's a choice we made. We made that as a financial choice. We are not going to invest in this stuff until we have cash to pay for each home repair. We do not want to go into debt for that. That's a choice we're making. That isn't something we ended up in. We could try to get debt and get new cabinets and that kind of thing. So every time my cabinets remain open because they don't close all the way, or I get frustrated because I haven't had time to paint yet, because that's something we can do. That's not a big fix. Every time that kind of thing happens, I want to let you know that I am grateful for the decision not to go into debt, and I am grateful for the cabinets that are broken because at least my cabinets were used. I have dishes that I love. At least my cabinets represent all of the times that we've sat around the table together and laughed as a family. It's looking at my life as a beautiful offering to God. But I could look over at my friends' beautiful houses or so-and-so's perfectly manicured lawn and be filled with envy and covetousness and hatred that that person has more time than I have or more money, and who do they think they are? And those thoughts can come into words that can kill, and that anger is destructive. That hatred is destructive. Do you understand? Not many of us are dealing with high levels of betrayal or somebody like really hurting our family. This, what we're dealing with are these small ways. And what I want to encourage you, as you're thinking about your thoughts to your words, to your actions this morning, before they get to murder and divorce and adultery, all those things, I want you not just to take every thought captive. I want you to sanctify your thought life in the power of the Holy Spirit. Your thoughts do not have to be rough-shod with what you do not have and what you do not get. You can go before the Lord and say, Lord, help me see all that I have to be thankful for. Lord, help me not covet what so-and-so has. Help me appreciate what I have. There's a way through. And the way through our words killing is for our thoughts to be beautifully cleansed and sanctified by the power of the Holy Spirit. Because this life with people, it's a mess box. It's messy. So are you really gonna live life with people, keeping track of what everybody has or looking for a way to to ease your way through life? Or are you gonna go, okay, step by step, God, fix my eyes on what you have, and may my thoughts be fully devoted to you. And God, in addition, help me look around the the house I have, the people I have, the good things, and focus on what is good in the world around me. And that good thought will multiply and explode in an absolute beautiful, fragrant offering of blessing. So as you go on your merry way this week, I encourage you to acknowledge that your words can kill, and to know that focusing on what the God of the universe has given you, even if it's just the breath in your lungs, can transform the mess box we have with people into a beautiful blessing. This is all glory to God. Amy Copley Mulder joined me Thursday, and may I say, may God's blessings fill you, and may the Holy Spirit sanctify your thoughts so that you can fix your thoughts on things of God. All glory to God.

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So it's done, it's the bathtime. Give it up. So that's give all the glory to God.