Weight Loss Journey After 40: How to See Your Progress

If you have lost weight, but the mirror still shows the same body, and you just can't seem to see or appreciate your progress, this episode explains what your eyes keep missing.

In this episode:

• The bikini photo a client sent me after losing 50 pounds, and the question that came with it
• Why the woman who loses weight is the last one to notice
• What happens to "enough" every time you get closer to it
• The one question to ask someone who has not seen you in months

Resources Mentioned:

💪🏼 The Strong Core Method: my 4-week at-home core program for women over 40, built for every level, even if you've never worked out a day in your life. 12 guided workouts per level with video demos, 20 minutes, 3 times a week, to build a stronger, more defined midsection.

📝 Grab the FREE Fat Loss Formula Workbook to calculate your maintenance calories, your protein target, and your exact calorie deficit.

🎯 Take the FREE 'What's My Metabolism Type' Quiz to identify your unique metabolism type and get a personalized plan to manage your weight confidently.

💌 Stay connected: join my BTB Newsletter for weekly insights.

🎧 Listen Next: Lose Weight Without Exercise After 40

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👋🏻 ABOUT ME:

I'm Andrea, a double-certified NASM Nutrition and Fitness Coach and founder of Behind the Body. For 20 years, I under-ate, avoided weights, and lived on cardio chasing skinny, and none of it gave me a body I was proud of. In my mid-30s, I changed my approach: more protein, real strength training, and a plan that fit my life. I lost 20 pounds, and 10 years later, at 45, I'm still maintaining it through perimenopause. I help women over 40 simplify their approach, build real strength, and get results that last. Every week, I cover the science, the strategy, and the honest truth about fat loss and maintenance for women over 40.

MEDICAL DISCLAIMER:

This content is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always consult a qualified healthcare provider before making changes to your diet, exercise, or health routine. Results vary. Andrea is a NASM-certified Nutrition and Fitness Coach, not a doctor or registered dietitian.

Transcript

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You can lose weight after 40, make real substantial, visible progress, and still feel like it's never enough. And that matters because you can keep changing the goalpost or quit a plan that's actually working, or spend years picking apart a body you will only one day wish you had appreciated. A client of mine had lost more than 50 pounds when she sent me a bikini photo recently and asked me if she looked okay. What she saw in that picture and what I saw were completely different things. And there are three things that I think we need to do differently to really appreciate and acknowledge progress when we make it. Because the answer is absolutely not giving up on your goals or pretending that you love everything exactly as it is. So my client, who is also a friend of mine, was getting ready to go on vacation and she wanted to wear a bikini and she wanted my honest opinion about how she looked. This woman is in her mid to late 40s and she's lost more than 50 pounds over the last couple of years. 50 pounds. And she still struggles with feeling like she needs to lose more weight or like she doesn't look good enough. It's something that we talk about all the time. So she sends me the picture and I look at it and I immediately think, oh my gosh, are you kidding me? Because I would kill for that figure. She has a waist, she has hips, she has curves. And here I am, built like a 12-year-old boy. I would love to have some of what she has. I knew she was looking at the picture, wondering whether she looked good enough to wear that bikini. I was looking at the same thing, wishing I had what she has. So I texted her back and I said, please do not waste this time in your life. Do not waste this vacation. Do not waste wearing that bikini, being self-conscious about your body. You look phenomenal. You have worked so hard for this. Be proud of it and own it. And the more I thought about that conversation, the more I realized that I needed to hear some of that too. And you may also. So let's get into it. I'm Andrea and welcome to Behind the Body. If you're over 40 and trying to lose fat, build muscle, or take better care of your health, you're in the right place. Every week, we'll tackle the questions women over 40 are asking about nutrition, fitness, metabolism, and aging, helping you spend less time doing what doesn't move the needle and more time focusing on what does. The first thing we need to do differently is we need to look back at where we started. When you're working towards a weight loss or a body composition goal, most of your attention naturally goes to what still needs to change. You look in the mirror and you see the stomach you still want a little flatter, or the arms you want more defined, or the five pounds that you still want to lose. Like whatever your thing is, we all have something. But think about what that does. You're comparing the body that you have today to a body that you haven't built yet. You're not comparing it to the body that you had when you started. My client lost more than 50 pounds over roughly two years. That kind of change happens slowly, about a half a pound a week, to be exact. She didn't wake up one day 50 pounds lighter. She saw herself every single day in the mirror while her body changed little by little. This is one of the reasons that I am such a huge believer in progress pictures. They give you the truest form of a reference point. If you don't believe me, go find a picture of yourself from three months ago, from six months ago, a year ago, and put that picture next to a picture of you from today. Look at your waist, your face, your arms. Look at the way your clothes fit. Look at your posture. Look at whatever has changed for you. And this doesn't have to be just weight loss. Maybe you've been strength training and you put on some muscle and your shoulders look stronger. Maybe you finally have some muscle in your legs. Maybe your body weight hasn't changed much at all, but your overall body composition has. Give yourself credit for how far you've come instead of only measuring how far is still left to go. Because if the only body you ever compare yourself to is the one that you're still trying to build, or worse, someone else's body, you can make a tremendous amount of progress and still feel like you're failing. The second thing to notice is when good enough keeps changing. This one I understand personally because I do it too. You start at one weight and think, if I could just get to 160, I would be so happy. And then you get to 160 and suddenly 150 sounds better. And then you get down to 150, and now you're not even thinking about the fact that you lost 25 pounds. You're looking at your stomach thinking, if I could just lose this extra weight around my stomach. Or maybe weight isn't even your goal. Maybe you wanted more muscle. You built some and now your glutes aren't big enough, or your arms aren't toned enough, or your stomach isn't flat enough. Like there's always another goal available to us. And I do not think there's actually anything wrong with that. I still have goals for my body. I like having something to work towards. I'm not gonna sit here and tell you that the answer is to stop carrying what you look like and just love everything exactly the way it is. That isn't how I feel. And it's probably not how you feel either. But there is a huge difference between saying, I'm really proud of what I built, and now I want to see what else I can do, versus none of this counts yet because I'm still not there. That second one is where I think we rob ourselves. Because where is there exactly? I'm probably happier with my body today, now than I've ever been. And I still look at myself and find things I would change. I can pick myself apart quite often. So I'm not coming from some magical place of peace and perfect body confidence. But what I don't want to do is get to 55 or 65, look back at pictures of myself at 45 and think, what the hell was I so self-conscious about? You know, I don't know if you do that yourself, but when I look at pictures of myself in my 20s, when I hated my body and punished it in every way possible in order to just be skinny, I think back like, what was I, what was I doing? What was I thinking? Why wasn't I smarter? Why didn't I see myself the way I actually was? I don't want that for you either. Not one more year of acting like you're not allowed to be proud of yourself until you hit some arbitrary number that keeps moving. You can want more for yourself and appreciate what you've already accomplished at the same time. Those two things do not cancel each other out. And the third thing we need to do is to get as good at seeing what is great about you as you are at finding what's wrong. The majority of us women are very good at finding our flaws. Give me 30 seconds in front of a mirror and I can easily come up with an extensive list. But if I asked you right now, what are three things about yourself that you love or are damn proud of, would the answers come as quickly? And I don't mean three things that you're willing to tolerate. I mean things that you genuinely think are freaking great about yourself. Maybe you have curves another woman would love to have, like my friend and client. Maybe you have broad, strong shoulders that fill out a shirt or a dress perfectly. Maybe you have great legs for days. Maybe you built your glutes and they're high and tight. Maybe you love your hair or your smile. And they don't all have to be physical. Maybe you're incredibly disciplined. Maybe you have spent the last year becoming someone who actually follows through on promises that she makes to herself. Maybe your work ethic is one of the greatest strengths. Maybe you were an amazing friend. All of those things count too. Nobody else gets to be you, and that is your superpower. Other women can inspire you, but the goal isn't to turn yourself into somebody else. You can never be the best version of somebody else. You can only be the best version of yourself. The opportunity is to figure out what that best version of you actually looks like, and then have the confidence to own what you've built and created. And that to me is such a flex. So I want you to do something after this episode. I know it's gonna sound lame, but I want you to pick three things about yourself that you are genuinely proud of. They can be things that you were born with, they can be things that you worked your ass off for, they can be physical, they can have absolutely nothing to do with your body. But pick three. Because if you can immediately name everything that you still don't like about yourself or that you want to improve, but you can't name three things that you already love and respect about yourself, then I think that deserves your attention. I keep thinking about that picture that my client sent me. She saw herself and wondered whether or not she looked good. In fact, I'm sure she thought she didn't. I saw her and thought, I would kill for those curves. Same woman, same body, completely different lens. And I guarantee that there are things about you that somebody else sees and thinks, God, I wish I had that. Things that you barely notice because you're too busy looking at your flaws. Keep your goals, I'm keeping mine. Work hard, build muscle, lose the weight if that's what you want to do. Get stronger, keep becoming the version of yourself that you want to become. But please don't spend so much time chasing the next version of yourself that you completely miss the woman you've already become. You have worked way too hard for that. So if you're working on changing your body and you want a clearer idea of what to focus on first, take my free metabolism quiz. It takes about two minutes and it'll tell you which of the five metabolism types you are and where I'd recommend you start first. You'll find the link for the free quiz in the show notes below. If you found this helpful, please follow the podcast so that you don't miss the next episode. And if you have a minute to leave a review or a rating, I always appreciate it. And if you want more from me during the week, come and join the Behind the Body newsletter. It's free at behind the body.com forward slash newsletter. And if you want to understand why exercise alone usually isn't what drives weight loss, listen to my last episode, lose weight without exercise after 40. Next. And I will see you over there. Thank you so much for tuning in, my friend, and I can't wait to chat with you next week.