Getting Your Life in Order: Why Structure Creates Freedom | Episode 6

Welcome to Episode 6 of Life, Finance, & Real Estate with KirbyTheRealtor.
In this episode, we’re talking about Getting Your Life in Order and why structure creates freedom.
Most people don’t lose momentum because they aren’t capable.
They lose momentum because their life is out of order.
Order is not restriction.
Order is freedom.
This conversation breaks down why life, finance, and real estate cannot be separated and why ownership cannot be built on chaos. We explore how disorder often comes from survival seasons, why awareness is the first asset, and how structure protects your peace, your finances, and your future.
In this episode, you’ll hear about:
• Why disorder is not who you are, it’s what you’ve been living with
• How survival skills differ from ownership skills
• Why order is protection, not punishment
• The role of margin in time, money, and emotional health
• Real-world financial disorder and why income alone doesn’t fix it
• Biblical principles of order and preparation
• Practical steps to begin ordering your life one area at a time
This is not about perfection.
This is about intention.
This is about consistency.
This is Life, Finance, & Real Estate and it’s about owning your life and owning a piece of America.
📻 Originally aired on:
92.1 FM and 93.1 FM
🎙️ Life, Finance, & Real Estate with KirbyTheRealtor
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👉 Share this with someone who needs structure
👉 Get in the room and let’s talk about it

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to life. Finance and real estate. The ever changing real estate market, and of course, things going on in life.

SPEAKER_02 1:39

Listen, if this is your first time tuning in, welcome. And if you've been in the room with us over the last few weeks, I'm going to thank you for staying because this is not just about me talking or hearing myself. This is about intentional conversation and me making sure you understand what life is supposed to look like. This show is about owning your life and owning a piece of America. And today we're going to go a little deeper because if last week we talked about why most people never start, then today guess what we're going to talk about. We're going to talk about why so many people can't sustain what they started. And I want to say this clearly, slowly, and very honestly. Most people do not lose momentum because they aren't capable. Most people feel like I started off good and then I don't know what happened. I started out good and I just couldn't do anymore. It wasn't because they weren't capable. They lost momentum because their life is out of order. And I don't know how many people who are listening can attest, but I can tell you honestly, I have been there. I've been that girl. I didn't, my life was out of order. It wasn't my dreams, it wasn't my goals, it was my life. My life was out of order. I didn't have a plan. I didn't have structure. I had a plan, but it wasn't executed properly because there was no order. So today we're going to talk about why order is not restriction. A lot of us think when you have order, you lose freedom. Um, but you don't. Order is freedom. This is life, finance, and real estate, guys, and you cannot separate them. Life, finance, and real estate all go hand in hand. And you cannot build ownership on chaos. I need you to remember that. Ownership cannot be built on chaos. Let me start here. Dorder is not your personality. Let's get that. Get that. Just say it to yourself. This order is not my personality. This order is what you've been living with. You've come accustomed to disorder. Some people say, I'm just, I'm just organized. I'm just not organized. Some people say, that's just how I am. Some people say, oh, I just I work better on the pressure. But then what the what you really want to say is, I learned to survive in this chaos. I like chaos. You ever hear people say they have organized chaos? Okay. Yeah, that's what it is. You've learned to survive. And survival is not the same thing as ownership. Only your life, guys, require order. Only a piece of America requires order. And on life, finance, and real estate, you learn that all of these things respond to structure. Let me say this in a way that I think will help you understand better. People can be so gifted. You can be so gifted, but yet be so disorganized. You can be talented, but yet be so undisciplined. You can be anointed and be unprepared. And eventually all of that stuff catches up to you. All of it catches up to you. And I know, I know so many people that I'm just like, oh my gosh, if I had half of what they have, the creativity, the poise, like all of it, I could be this and I'm gonna be that. And they have it, but they're not, they have no order. Let me ask you something. And I want you to answer this very honestly. And you don't have to out loud, because some of you may be around people, you may be at work, but within yourself, when was the last time you looked at your full financial picture? Just think about it. Think about the last time you literally just looked at everything. Not just what came in, but also what went out. Not how much money you made, but how much went out. What is one thing in your life that feels heavy, not because it's hard, but because it's unorganized? Just think. Think for a minute. Think about those things. Are you actually that busy? Are you actually that busy all day? Are you just reacting to all day? That'll preach by itself. Are you actually that busy? Are you just reacting to the chaos? What do you keep avoiding because you already know it needs attention? What is it? What do you keep avoiding? I'm not trying to get with you. I'm just trying to give you clarity. I'm just trying to get you to see. Because what you're willing to look at is what you're willing, you're finally ready to change. Like when you're willing to actually sit there and look at it, rip the band-aid off, and just take a deep dive into what you spend and what's coming in your home, what's going out of your home, then that shows that you're ready to take ownership. It means you're ready to change. I oftentimes speak and I talk to my nieces and my nephews and my godchildren, and I have my sisters and brothers, and I have conversations with them. When you're ready to change it, I'll be able to know. Some of you, some of you listening have heard people say you just lazy. But in reality, you're not lazy. You got all these smarts. You're not lazy, you're just tired because you you're it's chaotic. Your life is not in order. Some of you, it's not that you're unmotivated because we can see that you're doing things, but you just have too much that you're doing, so you're overwhelmed. And some of you are not feeling, you're just juggling too much. And guess what? When you juggle too much, when you juggle too many things without a system, you it's it's disorder. It's disorderly, y'all. It's just disorderly. Think about the word system. And I was asked this actually this week. No, hold on, let me back up. I was asked this a few months ago, but this week I got a refresher, and systems means saving yourself time, energy, and money. Look it up, systems. See, disorder often comes from seasons where you had to move fast just to survive. You learn to react instead of planning, you learn to handle things as they came instead of building structure. And y'all, I know a lot of us guilty of that. And it may exist then. But survivor skills, they're not ownership skills. It doesn't show ownership. What got you through does not always get you forward. You can get through something, but it's not gonna, you can't always continue with. It's not gonna get you forward. And that is why order seems so unfamiliar to people. It's not because we can't do it, it's because we're we're unfamiliar with it. It's because you were never taught to live there. See, this is life, finance, and real estate, y'all. And guess what? Growth requires new patterns. Let me give you some real life examples. And you hear me say all the time, we talk about people buying houses because I am Kirby the realtor. But people who want a house, but they never take our time to look at their credit. You won't look at your credit, you want financial peace, you won't be debt free, but you won't feel out that what I spend sheet, you won't look at your budget, you don't know where your money's going, where it's where it's been, how it's coming. You you say you're overwhelmed, but you haven't written nothing down. I can remember being asked, and it was recently over the last year, what your day looked like. And I used to cringe because I know the night before I didn't write down my day. I knew up here, but I didn't write it down. And it wasn't a lack of desire, but it was just a lack of order. And order doesn't mean everything is fixed. And I had to tell myself that because I would write stuff down and I'd be like, I didn't do nothing on my list because my day got disrupted. But it was written down, I was able to see what I didn't do, so I can come back to it the next day. So everything was accounted for. And ownership starts with honesty. Order does not mean you suddenly have money. Order does not mean that your credit is perfect. Order does not mean that your life is all happy and calm and what it is. Order means you stop pretending that you don't know. And it's powerful when someone says I don't like my numbers. Because let me tell y'all, I was sitting on the couch one Friday and I was like, I'm gonna spend time with the kids, but I'm gonna go with my budget, look at everything for the month of January and the upcoming month, February, my projections, just different stuff. And I was having this conversation, I was like, I don't like it. Like I know my numbers at, but I don't like it. Like I got nauseous because I didn't like where my numbers were. I didn't like it. Some of you say I may not like my schedule, but you're writing down anyway. I don't like my habits, but I can see them and I know what I need to fix and what I need to work on. And that's ownership. You take ownership. Ownership starts with awareness, but you gotta be willing to be open. You gotta be willing to take the ownership. Awareness is the first asset. That's your first asset is awareness. That's your first. When you are aware of where you are, then you can own your life. You can stop scrambling. Let me say something that might challenge you because order feels uncomfortable to people who are used to chaos, to all the the run and all the the no planning. Chaos feels so familiar. It's so familiar, even when it's painful, it's so familiar, even when it drains the lasting energy out of you. It is it's expensive. But order, order exposes everything. Order shows you the truth. And when I tell y'all, as I state over the last few shows, you can't unhear the truth, you can't unsee the truth, and order shows you the truth, it shows you the gaps, it shows you what you need to work on, it shows you what needs attention, and that's why most people avoid it because we don't like the truth. But the truth will set you free. Learn where your numbers are, learn where you are, learn where you can be better at. It's not to punish you, order is not punishment, order is protection, it protects your peace of mind, it protects your finances, it protects your future, and that's why life, finance, and real estate all require the same structure. It requires order. Let me say this plainly. Chaos also costs more than discipline. This order costs you late fees. You didn't pay your bill on time, they throw an extra$25,$30 late fee. This order costs you a lot of stress. You forgot. You didn't you didn't have this prepared and you forgot, so now you're stressed out trying to figure out a solution. This order costs you opportunities. People show up for uh job interviews and don't know a thing about what they're interviewing for, or they were late, or they didn't get the clothes ready the night before. This order costs you energy. You could have used to bill. And most people think order is hard, but y'all, guess what? Chaos? Chaos is harder. It is more expensive to live a chaotic life than a life with order. Chaos just sends you the bill later. Order sends dividends, chaos sends invoices. You hear me? Chaos sends invoices, and the sooner you choose structure, the less expensive life becomes. If budgets make you tense, yeah, it does. That word makes me tense because it's hard sometimes. If schedules feel restrictive, because you're trying to squeeze everything in. If routines annoy you, all it all it is is just fear. But see, when you got structure, structure removes the excuses. Structure removes your hiding place. You know how we hide? If we don't have structure, we try to hide behind all the chaos. Structure removes all that, it forces decisions, and decisions makes things real. But order does not take freedom. I need you to say that because people think they lose freedom when they have order. It creates margins, and I call them also boundaries. Order creates margin, margin in your time, margin in your money, margin in your emotions, and margin is where peace lives. Peace is not built, y'all. No, I'm sorry, peace is built, it's not chaste. Peace is built. That's what they said. Peace is built, it's not chaste. It's not peace is built. So you create order, you have peace. Can't chase it. See, Dave Ramsey, when he starts, you know, out talking and doing his um seminars and things, he doesn't start with investing. He starts with knowing your numbers. Knowing your numbers. Why do you think that? Knowing your numbers. So that you can understand. He's why? Because clarity creates calm before money ever changes. That's why when you know your numbers, then we can talk about other things. But if you don't know your numbers, how can you invest? John Maxwell teaches that leadership starts with self-leadership. If you don't lead your calendar, if you don't lead your money, if you don't tell your money where to go, it's gonna tell you you're gonna be wondering where your money went. Listen, if you don't lead your habits, they will all lead you. This is the truth, y'all. You can't own your life. You can't, you can't own your life if your life is unmanaged. You cannot own a piece of America if your finances are everywhere, if they're chaotic and you don't even know where they are. You can't. It's just simply impossible. And I am not here to make you feel good. I'm just here to tell you the truth. It's impossible. It's impossible. Let's talk about this. Let's talk about it from a biblical perspective. And I'm not gonna try to preach to you or at you, but the Bible tells us to let all things be done what? Decently and in order. God doesn't move through confusion, he is not an author of confusion. God moves through structure. You gotta think about uh stories in the Bible. God has structure. Noah built an ark, he built before the rain. That was structure. He had um, he had what do they call it? God gave him what to do, how to do it, and he followed. He had a strategic, he had a strategy. Joseph stored food before the famine. Before I said before, he stored food before the famine. Nehemiah rebuilt with the plan and not his emotion. He rebuilt. And guess what? God didn't wait for things to feel good, he didn't wait till they felt good. God waited for those things to be in order because faith without order becomes what? Chaos. But faith with order becomes power. See, faith shows up in systems. And I was having a conversation with a mentor, and they said, Do you know what the word system means? And I'm like, what it means? In my mouth, very smart. But no, he's like, really? What does it mean? Like the original systems, but it means saving yourself time, energy, and money. That's what it is. Save yourself time, energy, and money. System without the S. See, most people say I feel stuck. And stuck is usually just a cheat code. It's a code to say scattered. You got scatter finances, scatter priorities, and scattered decisions. But when your life is scattered, everything feels heavy. And that's why people start avoiding things. That's why people avoid starting anything. That's why people, that's why people who do struggle to maintain momentum. Ownership requires consistency. And consistency requires structure. See, owning your life comes before owning a piece of America. Before you can own a piece of America, you gotta own your life. Let's be honest. Some people make good money and still live stressed lives. Yeah? I've been there. Made good money. Looked at my numbers like where that money went. I had no idea. Made good money. Didn't know where it went. I had no control. It was no order. I didn't know. I didn't take out time to know. Some people we have opportunities and we still feel behind. We miss things because we don't have order. We don't have discipline. Some people have access, but no discipline. Because income without order creates pressure. And pressure eventually creates regret. There's a dip, you have to ask yourself what's more costly, the pain of discipline or the pain of regret? See, this is why life, finance, and real estate must be taught together, because money alone doesn't fix disorder. Ownership alone doesn't fix disorder. You have to have structure, you have to have order, you have to have systems. I've seen people so excited about buying a home, but they were completely unprepared. And that's why I'm here. It's not because they weren't qualified, but because their life was scattered. They had things not in order. The finances went in order, the paperwork wasn't in order, missed paperwork, unanswered emails, they avoided the hard conversations. They were trying to hide things instead of being honest. Opportunity doesn't wait for chaos to get organized. When the time is right, when those rates were where they were, and because you didn't have, you didn't have your stuff together, your credit, your finances, all that stuff, you missed the window. It's not too late. We can do it, we can get back in the ring. But see, preparation determines what doors stay open. Preparation. Let me slow this down, y'all. Because owning your life looks like this. When you own your life, you know when to wake up. You know when to wake up, you know where your money is going. You know what decisions need to be made next. It doesn't mean that you're perfect, it just means things are done with intentions. And I can remember being asked, um if I knew, do you know where your money was going? Do you know how you're gonna handle this? See, owning a piece of America is not just about buying property. When I say own a piece of America, it's not just about you buying that property. You gotta be prepared to keep it. What am I gonna do to keep it? And preparation is built through order. I want you to write this down. I want you to write this down. Get out your pen, get out your pencil, turn your recorder on, tell your friend to record, whatever. But order one area at a time. Let's talk about your life order, your sleep, your sleep habits, your sleep patterns. Talk about that. Seven to eight hours of sleep, your schedule, what your day looks like, your boundaries. Then we got the finance order. Let's talk about finance order. Finance order is your bills written down and you reviewing your bills. I'm I want you to write down every single bill that you have, and I want you to write down all the income that you have. And then I want you to review one account that you have. Review your account weekly, one habit address, real estate order, your credit awareness, your lender conversation. And I need you to have patience. You gotta have patience when you're doing this because order is not created by big decisions, order is created by a Small repeated actions. And most people think they need more motivation. But you don't. Most people, most people think you need somebody to push you, but you don't. You just have to make a choice. Make a decision to get some order. Get a system. Save yourself time, energy, and money. You need better habits. Motivational is just emotional. Habits, y'all, it's a structural thing. Motivation comes and goes, but habits show up whether you feel like it or not. See, on life, finance, and real estate, we talk about all this because ownership is built on what you do consistently. Not occasionally, but what you do every day. What you do, your life is not out of order because you're irresponsible. I mean, I can make the difference sometimes, but your life is out of order because your habits were formed in survival mode, and you became accustomed to that. And it helped you get through. But now it is time for you to build. It's time for you to go get it. Because habits are fixable. And order grows through repetition. And repetition creates freedom. Habits are fixable. When your habits, when you fix your habits, then order grows as you do those things repetitiously. And then repetition creates freedom. That's how you have financial freedom. You're spending habits, order, telling your money where to go. And then you become free. Let me say this before I move on. Order looks different in different seasons, okay? Survival order looks different than building order. Excuse me. Emergency order looks different than maintenance order. So don't compare your structure to someone else's season. We gotta stop because comparison is the thief. It's the thief, y'all. Comparison is a thief. You are not behind, you're just transitioning. And transition requires attention, intentions. I and T E N T I O E. Transitions require intentions. I want to give y'all some homework for the week. Get your pencils out. I want you to write down your monthly bills in one place, not all over the place. Put down your monthly bills in one place. And when you do this, I want you to look over those bills, and I want you to identify one area of disorder. One area. And I want you to take one financial action, and I want you to create a boundary for it. Not anything. One. And this is how you start, y'all. This this is how you start owning your life. This is how you move towards owning a piece of marriage. Because guess what? Ownership is trained through completion. And when you finish one thing, your confidence grows. You start to feel good. You get a your posture, you get them shoulders back, you put their head up in the air, your confidence grows. And momentum starts to flow. Momentum changes everything. Get a system, get discipline, get some order. Let me leave you with this. Freedom is not found in having more money. Freedom is not found in more opportunities. Freedom is found in order. Do you hear me? Freedom. When you have order, then freedom is there. Freedom will come. When you have orders, when you order your life, when you put things in order, freedom will come. Trust and believe me, y'all. I'm not just telling you this. I'm telling you this because I've lived it. This is like finance and real estate. This is about owning your life and owning a piece of America. And next week, we're gonna talk about what happens when order meets opportunity. But until then, don't avoid anything. Don't avoid accountability. Don't avoid knowing where your numbers are at. Don't rush. Don't ignore it. I need you to put your life in order. Put your life in order. I appreciate you guys tuning in with me today. I thank you for taking your lunch break. If you did, I thank you for even putting your headphones on to listen. I hope that this has um resonated with someone today. And y'all, I want to give a shout out to my listeners. I thank y'all so much for all the encouraging messages that I've been getting. I appreciate you so much because it means the world. It means that I'm doing what God has called me to do. It's helping me reach the masses and teach you about life finance and real estate, y'all. Because if I hadn't gone through this myself, I wouldn't be able to teach it the way that I do. And I love it and I'm passionate, and I want to see people succeed. And I don't want you to have to go through what I went through. I was sharing with uh one of my mentors today that at the age of 18 or 19, one of those ages, y'all. I had so much credit card debt. And I often tell my nieces and nephews, TT loves y'all. I don't want y'all to be where I was. And it wasn't because I was just spending. I was, I thought I had to take care of everyone, right? And it's just me. I'm a given person. So I was taking care of everybody. They didn't ask. I just did it. And um, I created debt. I created so much debt, so much debt. It followed me. I got into a credit counseling company and just so much, y'all. I've been through it, and if I can help shorten your learning curve with the help of the Lord, I'm gonna do so. So it's been real today, and I appreciate you tuning in. And until then, see you soon. Bye for now.

SPEAKER_00 28:10

Thank you for tuning in to Life, Finance, and Real Estate with Kirby the Realtor. You can catch us every Thursday at 12 p.m. on 92.1 WJMG, 93.1 WGDQ. And also you can listen live at 921 WJMG.com or 931 WGDQ.com. If you happen to miss the live recording, don't fret. We'll replay it at 6 p.m. tonight. Thank you once again for listening to Life, Finance, and Real Estate.