Episode 26: WHO TOLD YOU THAT? | Breaking Free From Limiting Beliefs

Who told you that you weren't good enough?

Who told you success wasn't for you?

Who told you your past defined your future?

And more importantly…

Did God tell you that?

Or did people tell you that?

In Episode 26 of Life, Finance, & Real Estate with KirbyTheRealtor®, Kirby Harrell challenges listeners to examine the voices, beliefs, and mindsets that shape their lives.

From financial myths and generational cycles to relationships, healing, and homeownership misconceptions, this episode explores how many of the things we believe about ourselves were never God's truth to begin with.

Genesis 3:11 records God asking Adam:

"Who told thee that thou wast naked?"

Because voices matter.

And the voice you listen to influences the life you live.

Join Kirby for a powerful conversation about replacing lies with truth, breaking free from limiting beliefs, and embracing the future God has for you.

Because ownership starts in the mind first.

Own Your Life… so you can own a Piece of America. 🇺🇸

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to life. Finance and real estate. Where we discuss how to make smart money moves, the ever changing real estate market, and of course, things going on in life. Here to talk about more with you is your host.

SPEAKER_02 1:41

We educate, empower, and elevate. Because what I don't teach you just how to earn it, I teach you how to sustain it. Y'all, it's all about success, purpose, growth. Own your life so that you can own a piece of America. Listen, I am so grateful you have chosen to spend this time with me today. This show is more about houses and it's about ownership. And y'all, ownership starts in the mind. It's about life, it's about finance. And today I want to ask one simple question. I want to ask you something. Y'all ready? I want you to take out your pencils, your papers, your notebooks, your notes on your phone, your recorder, and I need y'all to dive in with me today. But I want to ask you one question. Who told you that? Who told you you weren't good enough? Who told you success wasn't for you? Who told you your past defined your future? Who told you you were too old or that you were too late? Who told you that because you made mistakes, God could not still use you? Listen, many of us are living by beliefs we never stop to question. And sometimes we hear something so often that we mistake it for truth. So today we're going to challenge those voices and ask, who told you that? Because not everything that speaks to you deserves authority over you. And not everything said about you has to become true for you. I'm going to say it one more time. Not everything said about you has to become true for you. So before we jump into today's conversation, let's recap last week for our new listeners, okay? Last week we welcomed Joshua Brown. Joshua Brown's the owner of JB Boxing and Fitness. And many people know Joshua as the boxer, as the coach, as the gym owner, y'all. But we talked about the man behind the gloves because behind every success is sacrifice and behind every purpose is a journey. One quote that stayed with me when we were talking it was most people will ask about boxing, ask about the coach, ask about um the trainer, but few people ask about the man behind the gloves. And y'all, Joshua reminded us last week that success isn't always measured by trophies or belts. Sometimes, y'all, it's measured by impact. And he reminded us that purpose is bigger than positions. It's a legacy. It's a legacy. Purpose is bigger than position, and legacy is bigger than those likes on Facebook. And that thought leads perfectly into today's conversation. Because just as Joshua has a story behind the gloves, each of us, everybody listening under the sound of my voice, has a story behind who we are. And some of that story has uh was shaped by encouragement, some was shaped by pain, some by voices that believed in us, and some by voices that tried to limit us. So today we ask, who told you that? Who told you that? Genesis 3 and 11 says, and he said, Who told thee that thou was naked? Y'all, God, God, funny though. I love that God didn't ask Adam what happened, right? He said, Who told you? God said, Who told you that? Because voices matter, y'all. The voice you listen to influence the life you live. Adam had purpose, he had access, and he had assignment. But after listening to the wrong voice, he began to see himself differently. And that's what the wrong voice does. It may not change your situation first, it changes how you see yourself in the situation. It changes how you see yourself the next day. It just changes how you see yourself. Maybe someone told you, oh, you ain't gonna ever amount to anything. People like us don't get ahead. You always struggle, you'll always struggle. You're not smart enough. Nobody in our family did this. You waited too late. But my question today did God say that? Or did people say that? Because listen, sometimes the enemy of truth isn't an obvious lie, sometimes it's something that sounds very believable. Think about it, Eve, y'all. The serpent began with a question. Did God really say? Because if the enemy can make you questions God's voice, eventually you may begin believing the believing the enemy's voice. Yet God says you are fearfully and wonderfully made. He has plans for your future. You are more than a conqueror. You never underestimate the power of words. God creates beliefs, beliefs create decisions. I said that wrong. Words create beliefs, beliefs create decisions, and decisions create habits, and habits create lives. Proverbs 18 and 21 says, Death and life are in the power of your tongue. One of my mentors stays on me a lot because sometimes, you know, when I'm venting or I'm saying things, they just like, you know, watch what you say. Don't that that would manifest, watch what you say. And the Bible teaches us that. Watch what you say. You have what you say, you have what you believe. You know, those things you're putting it out there in the atmosphere, you're making it come to fruition. Life and death are in the power of the tongue. That means we must be careful not only about what others say to us, but also what we keep saying to ourselves. Because sometimes the loudest voice in your life is your own. And with that foundation in place, let's examine some common beliefs many people accept without challenging themselves. One of the greatest traps of our generation, y'all, is comparison. Comparison, y'all. It's a thief. Social media can make it seem like everyone else is winning, but social media, y'all, it only shows highlights. Life happens behind the scenes. Maybe you're comparing your chapter three to someone else, chapter 25. You only in chapter 23, and you're sitting there comparing your life to somebody that's in chapter 25. Stop doing it. Stop it. Your assignment, your time, and your season may be different. Success doesn't always look the same. For some people, success is a six-figure income. For others, it's surviving cancer, it's becoming debt-free. It's raising kids. It's finding peace and starting over. Success isn't always about money and titles or recognition, y'all. Sometimes success is simply refusing to quit. Each one should test their own actions. Then they can take pride in themselves alone without comparing themselves to someone else. That's what the Bible says in Genesis. Success also changes with the seasons of life. At 25, success may mean building. At 45, success may mean maintaining. At 65, success may mean mentoring. Jesus never called us to be famous. He called us to be faithful. Matthew 25 speaks of hearing. What word do you hear? Faithful. Well done, thy good and faithful servant. Not famous servant, but what? Faithful servant. Maybe society hasn't applauded the sacrifices you made for your family. But what if God calls that success? What if peace is success? What if healing is success? What if simply showing up every single day is success? Who told you success had to look like someone else's life? And while comparison distorts the presence, many people are equally trapped by the past. Many people carry labels from years ago. The label of failure, the label of divorce, the label of addiction, bankruptcy, mistakes. But y'all, failure is an event. It's not your identity. You can fail at something without being a failure. Throughout the scripture, God used imperfect people. God used Moses. Moses had a past, y'all. God used David. David had, we know David had a past. Peter denied Jesus. Paul, y'all, Paul persecuted the Christians and he had to change his name. Yet God still used them. That tells me your past may be a part of your story, but it doesn't have to be the end of your story. The Bible teaches you in Isaiah to forget the formal things. Do not dwell on the past. See, I'm doing a new thing. Your past may explain you, but it does not define you. And many of us, people under the sound of my voice right now, you're fighting battles that started with a sentence. One sentence. I'll never be enough. I'll never recover. I'll always struggle. Maybe today's the day you evict those words. Get rid of those words because not every voice deserves access to your future. And just as people become trapped by the past, many also become trapped by age and timing. Who told you you were too old? Huh? People often say, I'm too old to go back to school. I'm too old to start off. I'm too old to buy a house. I'm too old to dream again. I'm too old to love again. Who told you that? People reinvent themselves every single day. And as long as God gives you breath, guess what? Purpose still exists. My Bible tells me, y'all, in Ecclesiastes, to everything there is a season. Maybe your season isn't over. Maybe it's simply changing. Sometimes we disqualify ourselves because life didn't happen according to our timeline. You know, we have timelines, right? That we set for ourselves. Because I know I set one for myself. I had in my mind, yeah, I'm 41 now, okay? But I had in my mind by 40, I was gonna be retired and traveling the world. I'm a little behind, but guess what? It may be a delay, but it don't mean denial. Who told you delay meant denial? God is not limited by our age and our history or other people's opinion. And speaking of seasons, let's move into an area where many people have accepted struggle as normal. You know what area that is? Our finances. We've accepted struggle as normal in our finances. Who told you that everybody struggles? Many of us inherited spending habits without receiving the financial education. So we accepted financial stress as normal. But normal doesn't always mean healthy. Just because everyone around us lives paycheck to paycheck doesn't mean that has to be your permanent story. The wives store up choice food and olive oil, but fools gump theirs down. Who told us appearance matter more than peace? Let me tell y'all something. Some people look wealthy, right? And other people are building wealth. Those are not the same thing. You can look away, but your actions can be totally different. True wealth often looks simple. Emergency funds, paid off debt, retirement accounts, living beneath your means, peace. Y'all, social media, it often portrays wealth as flashy. And I don't think people understand that. When you're on social media, it it just is real flashy, right? But true wealth may, it may simply mean having options. You got options. Remember, I told y'all, I don't know if it was two weeks ago on the show, and I said, um, I think it was my financial advisor. He was like, What does financial freedom look like to you? What's your freedom number? That's what he said. He said, he was like, What's your freedom number? And I'm looking like, what do you mean? What's my freedom number? Debt free. Like, debt free. But he said something that will always stick with me because I was like, he was like, that's not the answer. Debt free is not the answer. I'm like, oh, okay, what do you think the answer is? And he was like, freedom number is being able to the number you need to be able to do anything you want to do without having to worry about money, without having to worry about if I can afford it, without having to worry about if, if, if being able to do whatever you want to do. That's what your that's what freedom looks like. So who told you talking about money was wrong? Money itself is not evil. Money is a tool, it allows you to give, it creates opportunities, supports uh ministries, and it leaves an inheritance. God don't want us broke. He says it is he who gives power to get with. God is not against prosperity, God is against pride and greed now, but he's not against prosperity. Money in the hands of wise and generous people can change lives. And remember, income and wealth are not the same. See, money doesn't change character, it reveals characters. And sometimes the issue isn't what comes in, it's what goes out. And once we begin changing our financial mindset, we naturally begin thinking about ownership and legacy. Who told you home ownership wasn't for you? Somebody listening to me. One of the biggest myths I hear is I need 20% down to buy a house. Who told you that? My credit must be perfect. Who told you that? I missed the market. That's one of the biggest things. Who told you that? Every generation thinks they miss their opportunity. But the best time to prepare is now. Not because everyone should buy today, but because everyone should prepare today. Improve your credit, reduce your debt, save money, learn the process, ask the questions. Preparation y'all positions you for opportunities. There are opportunities I felt that I missed because I had a chance to prepare and I did not. I did not. I didn't prepare. So if you don't remember anything else, remember preparation positions you for an opportunity. Your first home may not be your forever home, it may simply be your first step. Perfect isn't always the goal. Being prepared is I'm not saying everyone should buy a house today. And I'm not saying that everyone should be educated because fear thrives on vague information. I think I said that wrong. What did I just say? I'm I'm okay. I'm not saying everyone should buy a house today, but I am saying that everyone should be educated. Yeah. Because fear thrives on vague information. When you don't know, you're afraid. Fear says you can't do that. Faith and preparation say, let's find out what it takes. Maybe you were denied before, but what do I need to do to get in position? That doesn't mean never. You ask the questions, you follow the steps. It may, it may not, it may just mean not yet, y'all. It didn't mean it's the end of the world. And many of the beliefs that hold us back from ownership, it started long before us. Those generational beliefs. You know, some beliefs we inherited. Nobody in our family owns a home. Nobody goes to college or people like us don't do this or that. We just live to survive. But changing your future does not dishonor your past. You can appreciate where you come from without remaining there. You can honor your family while choosing a different path. Generational curses often begin as generational conversations. Perhaps God is using you to change the conversation. Don't be afraid to speak up. Maybe you're the one who starts talking about credit and healing and ownership and estate planning. A good man leaves an inheritance to his children. Inheritance, y'all, is more than money. Inheritance is wisdom, is faith, is discipline, is opportunities. Ask yourself, what conversations are you leaving behind? Fear or faith. Are you teaching your children to be fearful to do things? Are you teaching them to walk by faith and not by sight? Are you teaching them survival or strategy? Those conversations also influence the relationships, y'all, that we build. We build. Who told you healthy relationships do not exist? Who told you everybody cheats? Who told you trust is impossible? Let me tell you something. Don't allow one painful experience to become a filter for every future relationship. Y'all, oh, there was a time. There was a time, y'all. And I mean it was recently where I allow a certain, certain things, certain, you know, things that happen in my life. I just said to myself, you know, I'm gonna protect myself at all because I'm never gonna be nice. I'm never, I'm gonna stop doing this. I'm gonna stop doing that. And I had to have people speak to me, speaking to me. And I had I had to hear God too say, you can't allow people to turn you bitter or make you somebody that you're not. It's okay to protect your heart, protect your peace, but don't close your heart. There's a difference between wisdom and walls, y'all. Some people are not guarded because they're wise, they're guarded because they're wounded. And there's no shame in admitting you need healing. I mean, I admitted it. Sometimes I would see the very person or thing and find myself, you know, getting upset or frustrated or feeling that that portrayal again. And I'm like, Lord, work on me, fix me, work on my heart. But who told you strong people don't cry? Someone listening to me today, you're emotionally exhausted. You've been carrying everyone else. But guess what? Even Jesus wept. Strength is not pretending. Strength is honesty when talking about it, talking through it. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted. So He told you that the need and help made so who told you that need and help made you weak? Some people feel like, you know, if I ask for help or if I tell somebody I need help, I'ma look like this, I'm gonna look like a failure, or you know, I'm gonna be judged, or I'm gonna look less. Of a man or a woman? Who told you that? God created you with limits and what they need for the community. This leads me to another important question. Who told you you had to do it alone? Somebody here listening. This generation celebrates independence. Y'all, I celebrate independence. I never want to have to call and ask for help. I remember a time in my life where I would cry and I just try to figure things out. I didn't want to tell anybody anything. But then I had to realize God never designed for us to do life alone. Even Jesus had disciples. Two is better than one. Some people are exhausted because they are carrying burdens they were never meant to carry alone. Counseling is not weakness, y'all. Therapy is not weakness. Mentorship is not weakness. Accountability is not weakness. Wise people seek wisdom. And sometimes God sends help, but we reject it because we've been trained to survive alone. But see, survival is not the same as being whole. You may survive alone, but you usually heal in community. And that brings me to the heart of today's message. Whose voice are we listening to? Whose voice are we listening to? Are you listening to fear, culture, social media, family, disappointment, or God? You know, in John um 10 and 27, the the word says, My sheep hear my voice and I know them and they follow me. Not every voice deserves access to your future. If a voice produces fear, shame, hopelessness, ask yourself, does it sound like God? Because y'all, God brings peace, He brings hope and restoration. Be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind. Transformation starts in your mind. Before God changes circumstances, He changes your thinking. Because if your thinking never changes, your patterns rarely change. Have you ever believed something for years only to discover that it wasn't true? Who told you that? Who told you that? Replacing the lie with truth. It isn't enough to identify the lie. You must replace it with truth. If the lie says I'm not enough, guess what the truth says? I'm fearfully and wonderfully made. If the lie says I cannot do this, the truth says I can do all things through Christ who strengthened me. If the lie says my future is hopeless, the truth says God has plans to give me hope and a future. If the lie says I'm alone, the truth says God will never leave me nor forsake me. You cannot defeat a lie with silence. You defeat a lie with truth. And that is why you hear speak and that that is why what you hear speak and believe matters. Because one truth can break years of wrong thinking. So this week, y'all, this week, every time fear, insecurity, doubt, shame, comparison, anytime that arises, ask, who told me that? And if what you're believing doesn't align with God's word, maybe it's time to stop believing it. Maybe your assignment this week isn't to change your whole life overnight. Maybe it's simply to challenge one line. Because one truth from God can destroy years of wrong thinking. So ask yourself what belief have I been carrying that God never gave me? Who told me that? And what does God say instead? And as we close, remember where our strength truly comes from. I can do all things through Christ who strengthened me. Remember, people over profit, integrity first, success, purpose, growth. And never forget, ownership starts where? In the mind first. I need you to own your life so that you can own a piece of America. Listen, y'all, this is your girl Kirby the Realtor. Bye for now. See you soon.

SPEAKER_00 26:25

Thank you for tuning in to Life, Finance, and Real Estate with Kirby the Realtor. You can catch us every Thursday at 12 p.m. on 92.1 WJMG, 93.1 WGDQ. And also you can listen live at 921wjmg.com or 931 WGDQ.com. If you happen to miss the live recording, don't fret. We'll replay it at 6 p.m. tonight. Thank you once again for listening to Life, Finance, and Real.

SPEAKER_01 27:02

I make away, Faster, I make away. Let me tell you about it.