Toxic, Tempted , and Too Honest

You ever catch yourself saying “I hate toxic behavior” while secretly loving the exact same thing when it’s wrapped in good chemistry? We’re Ivy Noor and Scarlett May, and we’re turning our unfiltered bestie energy on a topic that hits way too close: toxic traits we secretly love, secretly hate, and sometimes can’t even name until we’re already in it.

We start with real life updates and the behind the scenes of friendship: how we get mean when we’re stressed, how we finally say the hard thing, and why honest feedback can be the difference between drifting apart and becoming chosen family. If you’ve been searching for better communication skills, friendship repair, or how to stop spiraling after conflict, this chat will feel painfully familiar in the best way.

Then we go there: sex, kink, BDSM curiosity, and the line between hot control and feeling unsafe. We talk about being told what to do in the bedroom, mirror confidence, why consent has to be specific, and the exact moments that are a hard no. We also call ourselves out on patterns like testing people instead of communicating, loving partners who need to be taken care of, oversharing too fast, and needing consistent reassurance.

Listen, laugh, cringe with us, then tell us what trait you’re working on. Subscribe to Nothing Untouched, share this with a bestie who will have opinions, and leave a review so more people can find us.

Transcript

Welcome To Nothing Untouched

SPEAKER_01 0:01

Hey besties, you're listening to Nothing Untouched, the podcast where we overshare, laugh a lot, and talk dating, hookups, and heartbreak. And all the messy moments in between. Hi, I'm Ivy Noor. And I'm Scarlett May. Buckle up, besties. Nothing is off limits.

SPEAKER_00 0:35

Hey besties. Hello. Welcome to another beautiful episode. We are getting these fucking episodes left and right.

SPEAKER_01 0:44

Hey girl, we we are nailing these. We're just getting them out and out and about. We are. It's our 11th. I know. It's kind of fucking unbelievable, isn't it? It's it's a blessing and everything.

SPEAKER_02 0:57

Well, you know, we just we've gone through so much already in these past 11 episodes. I mean, think about it. It's been 11 weeks. I mean, give or take, right? Since we started. Yeah. There's been so many things we haven't shared though.

SPEAKER_01 1:12

Oh, that's we're on it. I have so much to unpack and unload. Oh, yeah. I'm gonna kind of just tell you guys about like what's happening in my life. What am I doing? Where am I at right now? Yeah, you got some really juicy shit. So let's go.

New Guy Updates And Early DMs

SPEAKER_01 1:28

So I actually have been talking to a decent human being. Well, what? Okay. Okay, okay. I'm also with a skeptic in the background. Oh girl, yeah. So I've asked the questions. And I I mean, I've seen his dick. Oh not already? Not oh girl, he wanted to send that dick pig like three days in. And I'm like, no, I kind of like I want to see your brain first. No, I don't say that.

SPEAKER_02 2:00

You're twirling, trilling my hair here.

SPEAKER_01 2:03

Can you see me saying that shit? I want to see your brain. No, I kind of I'm like, I'm shine stuff.

SPEAKER_02 2:09

I'm gonna do it. And she's not. We all know that. So get give up the gig. No, it's coming with it. Okay. Scarlett, you know, I just I've had a little bit of fluffin'. We've had a little not.

SPEAKER_01 2:21

I mean, we haven't drink a wine or anything.

SPEAKER_02 2:24

No, well, we kind of had to. We've we've had a we've had a rough one.

SPEAKER_01 2:27

But the only the worst part about it is we're not drinking out of fucking cock.

Wine Cup Ideas And Social Pages

SPEAKER_01 2:33

If they would send us the right wine, I mean if it didn't become a pain to drink out of, you know, you know, I deserve that to you every time we went.

SPEAKER_02 2:44

I wonder though, I wonder if I could if there's like a company out there. We could patent this. Hey, maybe there's a mini, a micro. No, micro. The thing of it is though, what if we could like mold our boyfriends? Like our boyfriend, God, I said I'd say, I'm saying, okay, so like hypothetical your boyfriend, but my friends.

SPEAKER_01 3:09

Okay, okay. Shut up, boyfriend. Well, I thought we already had a mold of him. That's my hand. Yeah, no, but a better one.

SPEAKER_02 3:18

I wonder if there's like a glassmaking class that we could go to and do this. Oh my gosh. Okay, we're looking into that shit. The fucking yeah, ideas are rolling. Scarlett has now created us a Facebook social media, so you find us on nothing untouched and Instagram. Yeah, so just go on your well, yeah. So Google gaggle. Well, no, you don't have to Google gaggle, you have to go on Facebook search nothing untouched. We're the only ones out there, so yeah.

SPEAKER_01 3:44

No, we are a hundred percent and Instagram. Yeah, oh shout out, Ivy. Yeah, she helped us out with that, but but our ideas are not patent, no, so that idea that'll go viral, and uh we'll fucking cut that shit out. We'll get that. No, I'm just getting no. I want our ideas to soar.

SPEAKER_02 4:08

I know, absolutely.

Saturday Night Food And Banter

SPEAKER_02 4:11

Moving into our weeks and whatnots. Um what did happen this past? I'm so okay. Yeah, so on Saturday we went and tore it up. No, we went to an establishment, had some Oyster's Rockefeller. Holy shit, that was good. Oh my gosh. That was so good. It was so good. I burnt my mouth because I just wanted to like put it in my mouth. Sounds like you with a dick.

SPEAKER_01 4:34

Yeah. Give it to me. Boyfriend, I feel better for you all. Or good. Or good. She like gobbles that dick right up. Even though we were more into the we were more into the wine. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 4:52

Then we were and the conversation and the people watching.

SPEAKER_01 4:58

To be fair, I mean I don't think I've ever run out of conversation with you, Ivy.

SPEAKER_02 5:03

Well, I mean, the even if it is a dull moment, it's not a dull moment because we're always, I don't know, it's just it's it's an amazing chemistry, amazing atmosphere always with you. And yeah, it's easy. It's it's easy. And I breeze worthy.

SPEAKER_01 5:18

Easy breezy lemon squeezy. So darky.

Friendship Conflict And Honest Feedback

SPEAKER_02 5:25

I know. Again, I mention this quite often, haven't recently, but because we kind of went in a rut a little bit, and it's fine that happens, but you know, regardless, like we can pick right back up and just like yeah, out of all of our bullshit that we put each other through, honestly, that's a hundred percent. It goes back and forth.

SPEAKER_01 5:46

Yeah, I you have okay, so can I can I tell all the besties you have thick skin, and I've developed a little thicker skin. I say some fucking shit. Sometimes, yeah. Yeah, so that's what we talked about. It was like it was healthy to me. For me, I needed that for yeah, you need to unload. Yes, and I needed to accept it, and I did.

SPEAKER_02 6:07

Yeah, I was like very well. I was a little nervous, but oh girl, very well, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 6:13

I think I I become a really right exact moment for somehow, thankfully. It was actually eye-opening for me because I I have a hard time accepting my faults. Yeah, we all do. I try to like look over my faults all the time. Like I ignore my faults and what I do, and I know it's so fucking unhealthy for me.

SPEAKER_02 6:36

But it was beautiful, and I even told the boyfriend, I'm like, she actually listened to me. I did. I actually we had great, I we always have regardless, like that great capacity between us, but we did go through that time because I was kind of like off-centered, a little, yeah, absolutely. I wasn't understood. So just love the fact that I could unvent on you and just tell you exactly like what was going on in my brain.

SPEAKER_01 7:03

And I didn't want to, I don't want to lose what we have, and you did and then I actually do take a lot of like criticism, but that just be fuck you were honest, and I love that. No, you have to be honest with me, otherwise, I don't fucking know.

SPEAKER_02 7:18

Nobody knows, right? Yeah, if you don't we all get very comfortable in our own behavior that we don't realize and we and people around us are so used to it that when somebody new comes in and there's a whole new realm of things, you know, you you want to, you know, you've got that special something, but you're always we're human, and so everybody has their own opinion, their own feelings, their their own shit that they're fucking going through for that you know, week, day, year, whatever it is. And sometimes the people that are closest to you it comes out in the meanest ways, the the meanest ways and the drunkest ways, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 7:57

Um, you know what? The best part about I have a tendency to do these things, but I'm also like the kindest fucking person.

SPEAKER_02 8:04

Like and we're not shedding bad light on no no no starlight.

SPEAKER_01 8:08

I didn't think that either. No, I that's not why I said that, yeah. But no, no, I said it because I'm recognizing myself.

SPEAKER_02 8:14

Think too, like what's helped and how you know, because I I don't, you know, I'll take this shit for a little bit and then like eventually I'm like, okay.

SPEAKER_00 8:24

This is how you hurt me.

SPEAKER_02 8:25

But I don't say it like in a meanful, no, hurtful way. Exactly. And so, like, it's just a good pull away to like for how far we've we've come and communicating as friends and even more because like I feel like if nothing else, you're becoming family to me. Yeah, we just started it's hard not to.

SPEAKER_01 8:45

I bring my family around you all the time. You're like, okay, I guess I'll take another sister.

SPEAKER_02 8:51

But I I love it, I do, and and that's one of the things that I was fighting so hard for it, you know, putting the effort and made sure you know that we were in cahoots and stuff like that because it is important to me. When I when I make a connection and it's a real connection, it it means like I told you, my friends are my family, my family, my people are whatever. And so, like when I want to hold on to that because I know that I have a good side, I have a great side. Oh, amazing! You are the softest, yeah, kindest. I know you're making right, but you are you are so beautiful, yeah. Inside and out, yeah, truly. I do have like we're taking a moment here, Bestie. I know. I mean, and and she truly just is she writes papers for fucking people. Come on! I mean, she does she goes above and beyond for anybody and everybody for no reason. I really do, and it shows me the true side of you. Yeah, it just you know, you know, we have our barriers, and we have our barriers up too for sure. Yeah, you've been hurt in the past.

SPEAKER_01 10:01

I have a I have demons, you know, they come out. I will literally you're just like a recuse.

SPEAKER_02 10:07

A recuse is a better word because like you just feel like again, when you're not in a safe environment, when you don't feel like you're safe to let loose and let go or whatever, then you're gonna like they you you automatically think this is the same with I am in like right regular relationships. You automatically think like they're gonna like hate me forever. Oh, absolutely. That's the one thing that they remember, remember they're not gonna remember the good times, right? They're not gonna remember whatever people don't sometimes exactly, but those big burn loyal. My boyfriend always tells me, like, he is just so in awe on how loyal I am.

SPEAKER_01 10:44

You are. I can comment on this.

SPEAKER_02 10:47

And so, like, that actually like resonates with me so much. And I don't ever, I never looked at myself as being like that, but that's a big word, and like I want to be that for girl, you're standing up to it. People that actually mean something to me though, in my life, and like no matter what, because I already know your true integrity. Oh, yeah, I've seen it that I see even in like the bad moments that we've had, there were good moments and seeing there were those there was those integrity

Getting Sidetracked Before The Topic

SPEAKER_02 11:16

moments that would shine through. And I was like, this is actually her. Besties need to know like what we've been going through because we're being honest and open about that. Sorry, enough about that.

SPEAKER_01 11:26

Looking sidetracked, go on and on and on. Sidetrack is fuck. I don't even know what an hour later, what's the topic? Dicks, and where can you find them? I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 11:39

Maybe we just need to have an episode like this and see what happens. Well, I don't know, just like random shit. We're just gonna pop out random shit and see what's all we do.

SPEAKER_01 11:49

Like, I'm sorry, Bessie. We we do have topics, but we get fucking sidetracked as fuck. That's the fun part of it. It's the best part.

SPEAKER_02 11:57

I think you think you can that's where we resonate with each other. Like, I'm like, oh my gosh, like you made me think of. And then when I say you're like, oh, but then you made me think of, you know, and that's the cool part, and that's we've heard so much feedback on that. Like, there's we never miss a beat. So you ready for the episode today?

SPEAKER_01 12:15

Oh, we're doing it now. Oh, fuck yeah. Let's go. Oh toxic traits that we secretly love, or

Toxic Traits List Begins

SPEAKER_01 12:24

we secretly don't love. Okay, we can we can handle that. Okay, and I bestie's out there, you've got them written down, right? I mean, I do.

SPEAKER_02 12:34

I got them on my little notepad. Well, I'm gonna go ahead and start with number one that I've written out here.

SPEAKER_01 12:41

Toxic, non-toxic, or I it's up to debate. Okay, all right. I love that. Yeah, these are all gonna be up for debate.

SPEAKER_02 12:49

Okay, because some people will be like, that's every day. Yeah, and I would love to hear. I mean, every anyways, so I test people instead of communicating. Oh my god, that's fucking deep. Yes, I believe that.

SPEAKER_01 13:03

I do that, yeah. Cause you're you want to feel the waters. I get that. I for sure I am I am telling you.

SPEAKER_02 13:11

Tell me that.

SPEAKER_01 13:12

Did you did you tell yourself that? Because I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 13:15

I diagnosed myself.

SPEAKER_01 13:17

That fucking resonates.

SPEAKER_02 13:19

You want to test the waters, that's a good thing, that's a good quality thing. So do you have one or you mean to bring the other one that I have up?

SPEAKER_01 13:26

Well, it's it's it's kind of toxic because I okay because I bitch about it, and then I'm like, well, wait a minute. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 13:36

Telling me what to do. I

Bedroom Control And Feeling Safe

SPEAKER_02 13:38

can fully resonate with you on this one because go ahead.

SPEAKER_01 13:42

You you say it, and then I'll I know, but I want you to chime in because so I love to be like told what to do in the fucking bedroom, but it has to be in a certain way. I it can't be we've talked about that. Yeah, so it can't be aggressive, yeah, it just has to be like turnover.

SPEAKER_02 14:02

Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 14:03

Fuck yeah, compliant bit. Here I am. Okay, score a card, yeah. I love that a guy to tell me what to do in that sense. But if you actually tell me what to do in like a fucked up and where I don't feel like I'm in control anymore, I have to exit that. And you feel unsafe. Unsafe. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 14:28

I like to be controlled in the bedroom. I don't I am so much in control of my own life. Like, I don't want to just give up in the fucking I don't want to do that. Yeah, give up in that sense. I can't do that. Exactly. I don't want to tell you like what to do with me. Like, just do it. That whatever you want to do to me, just fucking do that thing. And question fucking later. And I'll tell you in that moment too. Like, and I won't be like, don't do that. I'll be like, hey, like, well, unless Haley is coming up, that's another story. Oh, she is, but you know, I'll be like, hey, let's not. The bite the nipples, Haley. Oh no, by the armpit. Go ahead.

SPEAKER_03 15:09

I just ruined that.

SPEAKER_02 15:12

I'm a single mom. I've been a single my entire career of the.

SPEAKER_01 15:17

We talked about when they Google single, you're the picture. I'm here. Not now. She got boycott. She taken. Lots one day. She taken. So uh when you Google uh Ivy, now you get uh she taken, bitch. She taken.

SPEAKER_02 15:36

Go on now, get get on out of here. But um, that's a that's a little meme of me saying that.

SPEAKER_01 15:44

I love that. No, we said that in one episode because I don't know. I love that go on get skin. Get him, skip them, get them out of here.

SPEAKER_02 15:53

Because you know, like down south, they don't fuck yeah, they run their words together. It was forgetting off topic.

SPEAKER_01 16:00

Okay, all right, back back to squirrel.

unknown 16:02

Back back.

SPEAKER_02 16:03

So uh yes, I am definitely a toxic person when it comes to that, and I don't mean to be, but it just comes out. So now it's back to you.

SPEAKER_01 16:10

Okay, it didn't happen to me, but I want to talk about it.

SPEAKER_02 16:16

Sounds fair enough.

SPEAKER_01 16:18

Somebody else's story.

Extreme Kinks And Mirror Confidence

SPEAKER_01 16:20

Let me just tell it. Here we go. Let me just tell somebody else's story that they can't be here today. Oh my god, do they die?

SPEAKER_02 16:32

So sorry, they couldn't gather with us here today. Sorry, dear. We're gathering for you in Jesus.

unknown 16:37

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_01 16:39

Okay, okay, all right, all right, all right. So I was with a guy. Yeah, because I don't have any other stories. And uh so he was telling me this a girl he was with that wanted punched in the face. Listen, I couldn't do a punch.

SPEAKER_02 16:59

A punch is pretty fucking extreme. But I've I've watched I've watched it happen. I mean, I'm dead not like in person, but like I don't know, like I get a little curious on porn.

SPEAKER_01 17:09

I'm like, what we got here?

SPEAKER_02 17:12

Let me just type in violent fucking no usually it's like BDSM, but like violent BDSM. I'm like, what is that? Anyways, I've seen it, I'm not negating that. I'll never forget the first time we're gonna go off on a tangent road. Short story long, on a porno, the very first time the girl was like in front of a mirror, and like she wasn't getting punched per se, but then like at the end she was, and she just was like fucking taking it, like he was spitting all over her, and then like hitting her, and I'm like, oh my! Oh my!

SPEAKER_01 17:48

But then I was like wet pants, yes, like we know about the slaughterhouse that you're in today. I've had so she's getting red besties. I know I don't talk about this a lot. We're getting deep.

SPEAKER_02 18:05

Let's let's talk about it.

SPEAKER_01 18:06

Yeah, okay. You know that episode when I was talking about how I want people to look at me in the mirror like that was my kink. Yes, guess what? Doggy style, yeah, but guess what? I fucking experienced a mirror thing the first time because I I'm very insecure. I don't want to see myself, but I really enjoyed seeing hemp yes fucking pound into me. It was fucking high. Fuck yeah, that's what I liked. It was a kink, all this kink blessing. You're just like, oh, this why am I after this? Oh, because I'm a human being, but we're we're not sick, we're just like enjoying our lifestyle.

SPEAKER_02 18:50

I wouldn't consider that sick. No, but I'm enjoying like the stuff I haven't had, yeah, you know, like to you, it might be a little bit like obscure because like it's just never been an accepted. Yeah, I'm gonna go back to that fucking same space. This is gonna be our fucking episode. Save space.

SPEAKER_01 19:07

Oh, it'll be the next episode.

SPEAKER_02 19:08

Is there a song that I don't know?

SPEAKER_01 19:10

No, not yet. Well, we'll get one out there, Besties. Save space now. You'll tune in to our uh we got a song coming out. Um, just tune in.

SPEAKER_02 19:24

Nothing untouched, save spaces.

SPEAKER_01 19:28

Lord hammerers, stupid so exploring in

Consent, Boundaries, And Speaking Up

SPEAKER_01 19:31

the bedroom, yeah. Throat work on me, like aggressive somebody like like choking you, not choking, but if they put their hand there, it's okay. But if they squeeze whatsoever, I am done. I have to that's my exit. Yeah, and then I have to go inside myself and I feel like a certain type of way.

SPEAKER_02 19:54

Yeah, I'm exactly opposite. Fucking cut my hair away, fucking choke me out. I'm on you right now. So I like certain things, but if you start to punch me, or I'll fucking I'll be punched back. Like, let's go! Yeah, so I mean, no, if somebody would punch me, I'd be done for it. But I like a good, like, I just like the aggressor, the controller in the bedroom. They tell you what to do, person. I will take over every once in a while for sure to like mix things up, but like other than that, fucking pin me down when I walk in that fucking room. You better fucking take me aside and fuck me. And uh probably do it. Especially if you know when I've had a fucking bad day and a rough day, you better fucking just get it. Teach me my lesson from my bad day. Teach me, Daddy. I'm just sorry. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_01 20:56

I don't share what I truly like on a first nighter. I mean, I let fucking golden retrievers look my fucking face.

SPEAKER_02 21:04

I like those might dig it. We'll see. I'm just like we'll see what happens. Is this part of it?

SPEAKER_01 21:09

God, I don't want anything to do with it. Like, save golden retrievers. But I'm also open to other things. Like, yeah, I don't know if I don't know. Yeah, exactly. That's actually the best question ever asked in life. You don't know what you well, and I just always like just know that you're never gonna not know until you experience it.

SPEAKER_02 21:38

Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 21:39

And then if you don't like it, speak up. I communication is key. I say that now because sometimes I'm like, I don't really like this position, but guess what? Here I am, I here I am, and I'm never gonna come. You do you boo get that?

SPEAKER_02 22:03

What is your favorite position? What is like your ultimate like what I come on?

SPEAKER_01 22:08

Like, yeah, okay. Right now, because it does change, but anyways, no writing. Yeah, I I come the most for sure. Well, because you can control like everything control it, but it's not about control, it's actually about no movement. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, that's that's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_02 22:24

Like control the movement and everything like that.

SPEAKER_01 22:26

Yeah, yeah, that's one of the big ones. Yeah, I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 22:29

Oh, if they're going down on me. Yeah, I know. You just should we give a shout out? Shout out, April Sky. Shout out a little shout-out, a little shout out. You might be putting our clip if you share and fucking like us, bitch.

Caretaking, Oversharing, Reassurance Needs

SPEAKER_01 22:47

All right, let's go back. Okay, here's my toxic trait. It's it you you you'll know right away when I say it. Okay, I love guys that need to be taken care of.

SPEAKER_02 23:00

No, this one I that's why are you shitting me right now? Holy shit.

SPEAKER_01 23:10

No way, no, I besties. I forgot. I've already wrote this shit. I wrote this shit down.

SPEAKER_02 23:21

Nerd. So dumb. We didn't even look at each other.

SPEAKER_01 23:26

We're dumb. Plus so you know, we just we're like turned away from each other. Same fucking word. Do you have one of those? I don't the guys that want to you want to take care of.

SPEAKER_02 23:40

I did. You did, okay. For sure did. Yeah, I was uh taken care of, I fixed everything, and I will be right there for you for everything no matter what. But anyways, so moving on, I overshare too fast, then regret it.

SPEAKER_01 24:01

Ooh, not me.

SPEAKER_02 24:04

Oh, I have done that, and that's again why like I built like a big ol' I undershare. I had overshared for so long, and I'm like, you know what? Why are you doing this? Do you feel so you undershare? So I overshare, you undershare. So share let's undershare that part.

SPEAKER_01 24:25

You want me to undershare?

SPEAKER_02 24:26

No, I want you to overshare. Well, well, I kind of already hear. I'm out of comfort zone obey hours. We're so dumb. Oh, I need consistent reassurance. Oh shit, I need that too.

SPEAKER_01 24:45

That's not that's not even toxic, is it?

SPEAKER_02 24:47

Yeah, yeah. So we need constant reassurance. That's like when you're like, well, do you like that? Right? Yeah, no, even if like it's not even like a verbal consent, it's just like just they know, just touch me, just feel me. Just I mean it's anything, it's any kind of consent or like recognition. Does that make sense?

SPEAKER_01 25:08

Oh, it absolutely makes sense.

SPEAKER_02 25:10

So we for sure both have this, girl.

SPEAKER_01 25:13

You got that straight. All right, besties.

Wrap Up And How To Reach Us

SPEAKER_01 25:16

We are gonna wrap it up for episode 11. We may be touching on this subject next week because we have more, or you guys may have more. So please feel free to email us at nothing untouch pod at gmail.com or now we have a Facebook and Instagram page. Go and follow. All right, besties. We'll see you next week. Bye.