Dumped, Emoji-flirting & an Uber gone wild!

We’re back from a long break and catch you up on six chaotic weeks that include a breakup, dating app nonsense, and multiple nights out that go off the rails. We talk through what emotional maturity looks like, where our boundaries should have been stronger, and why our friendship keeps everything fun even when life is messy. 
• the breakup story and how lack of communication changes everything 
• choosing grace while still calling out emotional immaturity 
• the reality of being newly single and what we want next 
• awkward nights out, unwanted attention, and the pressure to “be nice” 
• music festival weekends, rain-soaked shows, and bar chaos 
• dating app texting styles, leaving mystery, and why men chase 
• a sponsor milestone and what it unlocks for guests and gear 
nothinguntouchpod at gmail.com and write in 

Transcript

We’re Back And Catching Up

SPEAKER_02 0:01

Hey besties, you're listening to Nothing Untouched, the podcast where we overshare, laugh a lot, and talk dating, hookups, and heartbreak, and all the messy moments in between. Hi, I'm Ivy Noor. And I'm Scarlett May. Buckle up, besties. Nothing is off limits. Hey besties. We are motherfucking back. We are back. Whoop-woo. Did you guys miss us? Yes. Oh, you know you did. Well, that's basically it. We missed you guys. Hell yeah. This like Ivy and I were just talking just a minute ago because we always do our pre-talk. And we're just saying how fucking weird it is that we've taken such a long fucking break. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 0:51

Much needed though. Yes. Much needed. Yes, absolutely. Not necessarily from you guys, just break from reality and having lives. Yeah, exactly. Busy motherfucking lives. So, anyways, I think that we should just get into it. This episode is just gonna be about catching up and getting you guys caught up in what's been going on in our lives.

SPEAKER_02 1:12

Yeah, we've had uh six weeks to reflect on our lives, which we didn't do at all. I wish I would have reflected on my life a little more.

SPEAKER_01 1:22

There was no reflection, just a lot of drinking and partying, which is fine.

SPEAKER_02 1:27

Oh, yeah, we had plenty of that.

The Breakup And Emotional Maturity

SPEAKER_02 1:29

Well, because I am newly single. Yes, girl. Oh man, you've got a lot, girl. So why don't you tell us about being single? Sure. Yeah. How'd that happen?

SPEAKER_01 1:40

Well, so we know from you know, episode or season one that the boyfriend just really wasn't communicating a whole lot when you know all of the dusts were happening in and around him, which fine, whatever. I posted something on Facebook that just kind of reflected back on, you know, if you're not gonna be in it, then don't be in it, kind of thing. And apparently, you know, guilty minds will will flaunt, right? So he just came right out and pretty much the next day told me, and I was gonna break up with him first. I told her to, guys.

SPEAKER_02 2:14

Trust me, I was like, do it now.

SPEAKER_01 2:16

I was gonna break up because he just wasn't like I said, he wasn't present. I was gonna break up from with him first, but I was gonna do it in person because that's the responsible and respectful thing to do. Yeah, I'm not a teenager, anyways. Yeah, so yeah, but lo and behold, the next day he texted me and said, Yeah, basically, one of us has got to say it. It's been too weird, blah, blah, blah, passive aggressive, yada yada, fuck you. And uh, we didn't say fuck you, but yeah, then he just said, We just probably should. He doesn't have time for this relationship, he's too invested in his family, which got on him, whatever.

SPEAKER_02 2:51

But we had like a hundred people die while you guys were together, which isn't funny, but he truly did. Every week you're like, Oh well, so and so is not doing so good.

SPEAKER_01 3:02

I'm like, oh great. I know, like every time something happened and another person died. I just felt our relationship, like the strings of a relationship just yeah, it was basically a checkoff system.

SPEAKER_02 3:16

Yeah, it was kind of wild. Grandma chick, yeah, uh best friend check. I mean teacher, check the teacher. No, it's not funny, it's not funny at all. I'm sorry for laughing. Okay, but my friend was like, she's like, the teacher, that's a bit far. Okay.

unknown 3:35

I know. I know.

SPEAKER_02 3:36

I'm like, he's just making people up at this point.

SPEAKER_01 3:39

Well, and here's the thing too, because I watched, oh my god, I've been into the sappy fucking love story movies. I'm not into there. I can't help it right now. I'm so far deep and depressed at the moment. Opposite of me. I don't, I I'm like, don't want anything to do with it. Typically isn't me either, but just something was pulling me in, and I just started watching them. And well, I said that, and I watched like four, which is a lot for me, but I mean, regardless. Yeah, yeah. And I watched this movie, and it basically said, you know, if you're not gonna be in it through like all the hard times and and everything, like that's that's the main thing. Like, I was in it no matter what. I I was I was there for him, I didn't know how to be there for him because he didn't communicate how to be there for him. Yeah, you're trying to be like compassionate and caring exactly because that's what a partner would be, all the things, but in the end, like it you could clearly tell he just was not interested in that part of it. And unfortunately, like that's not unfortunately, but fortunately, however you want to look at it, like that's how relationshipships go. Like, it's not always going to be rainbows and butterflies, and shit happens, life happens. And so I don't want somebody that's gonna pull away from me every time that something happens. Well, something major in your life, it happens.

SPEAKER_02 4:53

Yeah, so in my opinion, though, you guys live 15 minutes from each other, yes, and you went two and a half weeks without seeing each other. Yeah, that's fucked up. I mean, for me, like it especially at the beginning of a relationship, you should be fucking seeing each other almost every night.

SPEAKER_01 5:08

Just because you're and just going from like night and day, right? Like, not I mean, it completely it didn't even, there was no forecast, no rain. It was just literally rainbows, butterflies, everything, and then just nothing, everything shut off. And I'm just like, what is going on? You know, you can't tell somebody that you adore them and that you want to do all these amazing things with them, and then something major in your life happens, and then you cut ties. But here's the thing, too. I'm giving him grace, and we're still friends, and I'll I'll always be his friend. There's just there's certain types of people that can can handle things, certain people that can't, and that's called emotionally maturity. If you can't be emotionally mature, then I don't want you. Agreed.

SPEAKER_02 5:52

So, yeah, and at 50 some years old, you think you would have 40s, nine, yeah, but close, yeah, yeah. Either way, yeah, round the fuck up, okay? Don't round up for no.

SPEAKER_01 6:04

We round, we round up, but anyways, no, I mean, so that there's that.

Dry Spells, Hookups, And Temptations

SPEAKER_02 6:12

I do want to like do a solid brag here. Ivy went through a dry spell and I didn't.

SPEAKER_01 6:18

This is true. Yes, yes, Scarlett did not.

SPEAKER_02 6:23

I did, but like, not like not like that, not like that. Yeah, I was just not like this. Girl, yes. I now you know my life.

SPEAKER_01 6:33

Yeah, I was all bragging about getting the D every nine, three, four, five, six, so yeah, blah. You couldn't even sleep. And then here's Scarlett is she's like, oh, guess what? And I'm like, go fuck yourself. I'm like, you didn't do anything last night?

SPEAKER_02 6:48

I did.

SPEAKER_01 6:52

Oh so then rolling over then to you. Let's get ourselves.

SPEAKER_02 6:58

So I have not uh went on any dates or anything, but you know, I fucked up. I had smoke ups. Well, you know, A plus guy came back around, you know. Another I actually got to meet A plus Yes, you did. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And and the flesh, uh-huh. And not as boxers, and uh not in the bathroom. Anyway, so I I wanted to start first too about like what we've been doing, like what the things we've gone and done. Because we've fucking done a lot so much, yeah. In these last few weeks, for sure. We

The Creepy Dance Invite And Aftermath

SPEAKER_02 7:33

went to see a band, yeah, and they were awesome, and we went with some other friends, and oh, it's good because uh poor Ivy. Oh god, oh god, I know it's like so. Some guy just he was staring at her, looking at her.

SPEAKER_01 7:54

It was yeah, listen, guys. I didn't know, I did not know if he was looking at me, looking at the table. I didn't know. So this this random dude was like literally surveilling, so he would be standing, let's say to the left of us.

SPEAKER_02 8:09

Yeah, and I noticed him right away because that stuff I did too, because he well, he was dancing by himself and like it was kind of creepy, exactly.

SPEAKER_01 8:16

Yeah, so he was yeah, exactly what Scarlet said, he was dancing by himself off to our left. So my peripherals, I was like keeping my eye on him. I'm like, I yeah, I got you. And then he would come to the front and like look at our table and like dance, yeah. And then he would go off to the right and look at our table.

SPEAKER_02 8:33

And then all of a sudden he'd appear on the other side, the other side of the stage. And I'm like, where's this guy coming from? So go ahead, you tell it from your your POV. Well, I I didn't help in the situation, so I he came up in okay, so the way we were sitting, everybody we were like not say front and center, but but we were everybody was behind us. Yes, so you know, if we were to be uh up dancing or whatever, everybody behind us could see everything. So he came up to Ivy and you know, asked her to dance, and girl did not want to do it, like and and me and our friends, we did not help because we were like, No, girl, you have to. Yeah, everybody's watching and I was gonna know. Yeah, and like you can't turn him down. You like in front of me. I was though. I was like, no, thank you. Yeah, so awkward as all get out, and so yeah, so they fucking made me.

SPEAKER_01 9:36

Yeah, I was like, you can't turn him down. You just there is there's a video floating out there somewhere. I have it. So anyway, I have it! I snapped it. I am awkward as fuck moment. I was so stiff and so fucking it was weird. He whispered in my ear about how beautiful I was. Gross. I almost threw up in my mouth. In fact, I pretty much did. Yeah, so thank you so much, bitches, because that was fucking horrid.

SPEAKER_02 10:04

It was entertainment, but not because it was clearly the most awkward moment. She did not look happy, and I'm like, oh shit. She's gonna come back pissed. But you did you did the right thing, honestly, because you can't really turn this guy down in front of everybody. I can though. You could I I think my heart would have broken for this dude.

SPEAKER_01 10:27

Nope. I know. Nope. I was turning him down, and I 100%, if these bitches would not have been there, he would have been turned down. But the weird thing was is that he just kept at it. And I think that if he wouldn't quit. No, he would not quit, and that's what made it even weirder. Awkward. Yes, yeah. I'm just like, get yeah, get out of there, get out of there.

SPEAKER_02 10:48

But I'm like, get in there, you have to. That's right. I need security. It wasn't just me, though. It was our other friend, and your other friend, she's like, You have to. I mean, we all agreed.

SPEAKER_01 11:00

And the one friend knew him, supposedly, so whatever. It was just okay. Yeah, awkward. Okay. So that was the one band. But and then, so that night though, so we uh man, when Scarlett and I do it, we do it good. We all know that, right? So I mean we don't know how when to leave a party for sure. Well, I mean, when the party is all about you, yeah, that's right. So then Scarlett spots with her little eagle eye some fucking guy that she's had her sights on for some time.

SPEAKER_02 11:34

Well, just like for about two weeks. Anyways, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 11:39

So then she goes out, she talks to him, they come back in together, he sits down. Uh-huh. Yeah. And immediately, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 11:46

I was like, Ivy's like, nope, nope, not today, not ever. Nope. Nope, not this one.

SPEAKER_01 11:53

And I'm like, but why? Oh, he's so great. So, and then he showed his true colors because the entire time, well, first I was trying to talk to him. He turned from me while I was talking to him and I was like, Okay. You were in a story, yeah, and I already heard the story, or whatever you're talking about.

SPEAKER_02 12:13

I don't even remember, but I know you were actively telling him a story. He asked me a question, yes, and you answered it, and he just like he like looked away and looked around, and it's like, oh, which he was really drunk. I'm not giving him sure credit because I would not, that's rude, but yeah.

SPEAKER_01 12:29

So that was no well. First of all, the way that he walked up, that was a no th no for me. Second thing was him asking me a question and then just completely like being disengaged from the question.

SPEAKER_02 12:42

Yeah, like not really acknowledging that you were even talking.

SPEAKER_01 12:45

It was so fucking weird. And then, and then the way that he was flirting with that fucking bartender. I'm like, oh, nope, ew, gross, yuck, get out of there. Uh-huh. You don't need that.

SPEAKER_02 12:57

See, I look at it like I because I'm way prettier. That's I don't look at it like that. You know that. I was clearly like, mm-hmm. I was grossed out, but then also my lady parts were screaming, screaming like, get that something. Get the dick in. Get something in you, bitch, besides yourself.

SPEAKER_01 13:20

So then we leave. But wait, there's more. Oh, yeah, there's always more. So then we leave, we give him a fucking ride home. I so I'm the first stop because uh Scarlet and him live in the same city. Okay, so I'm the first stop because I live in the same city at the establishment that we were in. And I was like, okay, you can get up front now. And he's like, No, I don't need to. I don't need to.

SPEAKER_02 13:45

And I was like, what? Oh, I uh yeah. So I was like, no, you can get up front. No, I'm okay back here. I was like, uh so I actually didn't know what to do because I was kind of like, okay. So I ended up, I'm like, dude, you're getting in the fucking front seat because I'm not an Uber. Well, you just stop when you stopped. Yeah, and then I was like, this is not right. So things up with this. I am no Uber and I'm not getting paid for this shit. Right. So yeah, so that happened. I was like, what the? Which I know he was intoxicated, whatever, but then I we get to it. I dropped him off at his house and he like chalk, we talked and like I don't know what we were talking about. I I was I had just enough like couple beers that I was just like chatty. Yeah. I get in the chatty stage, and then yeah, no, it's not nothing. Okay, I did do this though, and I will admit to it. I asked to make out with him. Oh my. I told you this. Okay, yes, I I remember, but I had to because I was like, got turned down. Oh yeah. He's like, he turned me down because he'd been drinking all day, which was probably the right thing to do. The one right thing that he did. He's like, no, he's a thing. No, I can't tonight. I mean, I probably shouldn't, but yeah. And then so I I was like, oh no, you I gave you right home. I asked you to make out. I got shot down. Oh, it was it was a glorious night. It was so glorious. So that happened, and then yeah, so I actually unfriended him on everything at that point. I did.

SPEAKER_01 15:29

Well, at that point, yes, yeah, but something something else happens. Yeah, so we gotta continue on with that story from him.

SPEAKER_02 15:35

Okay, we'll finish that up, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:37

Yeah, but yeah, so that was crazy. So that was our first band uh of the summer, quote unquote. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Which was amazing.

SPEAKER_02 15:45

It was such a fun night.

SPEAKER_01 15:47

So fucking busy because that was Memorial Day weekend.

Three Nights Of Bands And Chaos

SPEAKER_01 15:50

So then after that, was the next one? Was that the three-day?

SPEAKER_02 15:54

Well, yes, it was. We didn't the we did a three-day excursion.

SPEAKER_01 16:00

Listen, besties. Okay, we are 40 something years old. And the first night was a Thursday night. We did really good though. Oh, hell yeah. We did hell yeah, hell yeah. We had to both work the next day.

SPEAKER_02 16:14

Friday. That night. Okay, so that night we oh yeah, the band was great. We danced like crazy. Oh, oh, and we ended up in the paper. Oh god, okay. Oh god, oh boy. So we got our asked to our picture be taken because we're fucking hot. Okay, besties, we be hot. So we uh they asked us to take it if we could they could take our picture. Okay, it's a couple people, actually. It wasn't just one, yeah. So I was had my mouth open, looked like I was shoving a dick in my mouth. Yeah, I was waiting for the fucking and you're like, we're both just look sweaty as oh my god, it was like and we are so fucking yummy chins.

SPEAKER_01 17:03

What was yummy chins and Karen karaoke? That'd be a Frenchie, Karen karaoke and yummy chins, yummy chins, yeah. That's what the picture looked like. Okay, so just picture that. Yeah, I was yummy chins. Like I said, it was a bad angle. I mean, they did us dirty. There was so many other ways, I'm sure. There had to have been.

SPEAKER_02 17:29

But if you scroll through everybody else's, they're amazing. Fucking amazing. I'm like, who did I piss off in that newspaper? Who was that man that was taking our picture? Who did I piss off in the photo room? No, thank you.

SPEAKER_01 17:43

Yeah, we were sweaty gross hogs. Oh, yeah. We looked like big old fat fucks, but that's fine.

SPEAKER_02 17:50

Yeah, so yeah, that happened. So yay. So we were everybody's like, oh, it's not your picture. I'm like, no, thanks.

SPEAKER_01 17:57

And then I say everyone's like, oh my god, did you see you in the newspaper? I'm like, shut the fuck up, get out of here. No, you didn't. That wasn't me. All right, that's yummy chins.

SPEAKER_02 18:06

Karen karaoke. Those are our new names. Not Ivy, not Scarlet, Yummy Chins, and Karen karaoke. So yeah, that night was pretty banging. It was a good time. Oh god, I love that music dancing. Dancing just like gives oh uh just it's like one of those things where it's like I no matter what age I am, ever, I think it'll be a thing.

SPEAKER_01 18:30

I'll be dancing in my funeral.

SPEAKER_02 18:32

Listen to me right now. I'll be dancing at your funeral for sure. I was like, hit it. Let's go. Let's go in there because she would love this shit. I'm like, play that funky music. And you're like sitting in your casket, like, oh I'm like, bitch dance. What are you doing?

SPEAKER_01 18:56

Why do you be dying on me? So then and then Friday night, so Thursday night, there was somebody out there that a Scarlet knew that just like came up and I was like, well, I don't know, very young.

SPEAKER_02 19:10

But very young, yeah. But more my type, but not my type. Yeah. I knew him that that that would never happen. But he was young, like I like him.

SPEAKER_01 19:19

Super nice guy, just kind of awkward at first. And then the Friday night, we ended up, I don't know, kind of like he just like stuck by our side, and it was actually ended up a really good night, and that was the night that That was country night. Yeah, but we like a country. Oh my god, that band. Fuck yeah. Listen, besties. That is the number one thing that everybody should get out and do is go to somewhat of a small town music festival because you never know what bands that you've never heard of are out there.

SPEAKER_02 19:52

Yeah, because what I can't remember even their names, but they do, I know. Okay, but they have some motherfucking hot dudes singing.

SPEAKER_01 19:59

Oh my they weren't just hot, but they could fucking sing. Panty melters.

SPEAKER_02 20:03

Oh girl. Oh my Lanton. They did not disappoint us. No, and they were crowd workers. Oh, hell yeah.

SPEAKER_01 20:11

I love crowd workers, you know? Yeah, no, so and then Saturday night. Oh wait, I want to tell one story about that.

SPEAKER_02 20:18

Yeah, so we were there was an afterband, and we were standing. Okay, I don't even know if this is like I took it as this. So me and Ivy were standing, like just dancing to the band. And these girls just came over. I think one of them was the main singer's girlfriend or wife. They came over and just stood right in front of us, and we're not tall. No, so I was like, There was no reason for it, no reason whatsoever for it. And I was like, if I'm not gonna punch somebody tonight, we're just gonna move over. I mean, maybe one more beer, and I'd been like, bitches, but oh, and then we were standing the first night, remember we were standing, like just out in the middle of fucking nowhere. It had just started, it had just started. We were out in the middle of fucking nowhere. Yep, and these people just came women, yeah, came behind us and put their chairs not not one foot behind us.

SPEAKER_01 21:14

Yeah, there wasn't just one or two of them, there was a group. I would say at least six to ten of these.

SPEAKER_02 21:20

Like I there was there was a plenty of space. Oh my gosh, everywhere, everywhere, and this is what they chose to do. Yes, so that was like what's happening? Yeah, I don't I didn't know what the reasoning for that all was, but it was weird.

SPEAKER_01 21:34

So we stood our ground for a minute in that situation. Yeah, I was like, what the fuck? I know, and but then I was like, you know what? I can't seem awkward, yeah. I can't do it. I don't I don't like and they kept like brushed up against us, and I'm like, is there an issue that I don't know about? Like, what is happening?

SPEAKER_02 21:50

The best the funny thing is, we are not shit starters. Like we haven't. We literally say we say to each other ever, all the time, all the time. That's why I'm like. Like, what's happening? Did you piss this bitch off in the bathroom? What's going on? Like, what happened? No, it was it was an a couple nights of like oh so I want to tell this other story because oh, the third night was rock night.

SPEAKER_01 22:15

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 22:15

So Besties, it fucking rained and rained. Oh my gosh. In rain. But I had a blast. Oh fuck yeah. I would I wouldn't do it all over again. Oh, 100%. So it did rain all it poured actually. We were drenched as fuck. We look like basically the first night, but the first night was sweat. But rain. Yeah. So, but yeah, they had to pull put off the concert for a little bit because and it was a really, really I'll we'll just tell you. It was Hinder. It was Hender.

SPEAKER_01 22:44

And they're they're they're popular enough. You guys will know. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. I mean, I know the main singer is not the same one, but it doesn't matter. The point is, is that I was dying to see them. And I wasn't leaving for nothing. Same girl. Same. Was not leaving for nothing. Nope. We paid for them damn tickets. Fuck yeah, we did. And we were staying all three fucking nights. Till the very end. Yes. No matter what. No matter what. Sunshine or drenched as fuck. Yes. Yes. Yes. That just tells you what true music enthusiasts we are, I guess. Oh girl.

SPEAKER_02 23:18

Or maybe you just like never know how to leave anywhere. We just love to have a good time. Yeah, we had super fun.

SPEAKER_01 23:24

You know, we just we do. And that's one thing that we can definitely cherish about each other for sure. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 23:29

So I did want to bring up that that guy.

When Flirting Gets Weird And Aggressive

SPEAKER_02 23:32

Okay, so I don't know. This guy, I I just couldn't like I can't fathom people that like do things that just don't I don't understand for one. So I believe he was kind of like interested in me. He was like looking at me here and there. But I was standing, like, get why they were singing, the band was singing, and I was up just dancing with a friend. I think you were behind us under the tent for a little bit. But he came up and he opened a beer can in my ear, not like right next to my ear. It splashed in my eye, but yeah. It splashed in my ear. It scared the fuck out of me. And I the dude almost lost his cock. Yeah. Almost. I there's just some things you don't fucking do to me, especially like my ear. I mean, like, scare me like that. That was fucking scary.

SPEAKER_01 24:28

And I dude, oh yeah. Some men, I want to say boys, if I will. Some just seriously, because that's it goes back to like grade school, like fucking uh pulling down your pants, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:40

Like, come on.

SPEAKER_01 24:41

Yes, I agree like we're adults, like get over that shit. It's we're adults now. There's different ways to flirt and show that you're not gonna be able to do it. That was not that was aggressive and it's probably actually a good thing that I wasn't out there because I was yeah, pretty drunk. Yeah, I was pretty drunk. So I it's probably a good thing that I was not out there because I probably would have said something.

SPEAKER_02 25:00

I mean, I just I did I I stuck up for myself. I was like, what the fuck are you doing? Yeah, don't get the fuck away. I was proud of you for doing that. Yeah, no, it was not cool, and I uh I'm just like you better fucking stay clear from me, dude.

SPEAKER_01 25:13

This reminds me so much of that night now because Saturday was actually a fucking wild night. Yes. So there was this guy in the crowd, and he was like this big, bulky, muscular dude. Oh god, yeah, black shirt.

unknown 25:25

I forgot.

SPEAKER_01 25:25

And Scarlett was like, Oh, there's your type. And I was so I have my I was like, I know already. I'm I'm already scouting them out. I have like eyes. So I saw him immediately.

SPEAKER_02 25:34

I was like, girl, that's you.

SPEAKER_01 25:35

That's your man tonight. We ended up underneath the tent because it ended up started pouring. So thankfully, they had a tent next to the beer garden, so we were able to get beers and stuff. So my first trip over to getting more beers, I I was again, I was already pretty much feeling it good, good to go. Yeah, we were we'd been drinking and they they delayed it for so long, you know. So, I mean, what else do you have to do? So you have to talk and drink, yeah, exactly. So no movement, just standing and talking and drinking. So I went and got the next round of drinks. And when I was coming back to the table, mind you, it's it's a short distance. All of a sudden, black shirt bulky dude just starts like walking beside me. And I was like, this is this is kind of connected.

SPEAKER_02 26:18

She just got done talking to you. I know, fucking weird. Got done being like talking, like, girl, you gotta hook up with that dude or something.

SPEAKER_01 26:26

So he comes back to the table and he starts chatting it up with me. And I'm I'm talking to him. First of all, the stench that he gave off. Oh, girl. I was like, meh. No, no, thank you. Not ever. Nope. I know that it's sweaty and it's hot out there, but there's this thing called deodorant. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 26:46

Which I, you know, you sometimes you don't have control over it if it wears off. I get it. I've been there. But then again, you know, he was probably nervous. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 26:55

I'm giving him like, but so I I I try to remember to spark up a conversation, and I was like, hey, like, oh, so are you here with other people? Like, what are you doing? And he's like, No, I'm here by myself. And I was like, Oh, so you're are you having a good time? And he's like, Oh, I don't know. And I was like, Okay, so like moving online, like just like I what no, you couldn't hold a conversation, so no, I was over it. Yeah, like at what before it even began, I was over it. Yeah, like why even stand at my table and like try to conversate with us when and not conversate, and not convers. That was fucking weird. So I was like, okay, nice see ya.

SPEAKER_02 27:34

Anybody that doesn't like reach our level of like socialization, it's like I don't even care if you're fucking weird.

SPEAKER_01 27:42

I would much rather you be weird like me. Me, but give it, let's let's have something back. Oh my god. Then okay. I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 27:49

All right, yeah, okay. Since you brought it up. Okay, here we go. Okay, so that was the night we came back here and uh oh, with our other friends and proceeded to just drink and hang out.

Dating App Texting And Playing It Cool

SPEAKER_02 28:03

Oh man, yeah. I discovered something about Ivy I had not known, and I was like, girl, so the way she responds to messages. I laughed for hours and hours and hours about this because it was oh my god, we stayed up until like fucking 3 a.m. Yeah, and laughing, yes, but there was reason for this laughter, girl, Ivy, like you respond like that guy responds. So she she obviously single, looking for, you know, just ready to mingle, yeah, ready to mingle and talking to guys off dating apps. And I read some of her messages that she was responding to, and I'm like, oh my god. We were sare we were sharing stories. Oh yeah, we were sharing stories because I was making fun of the fact that these guys do it to me. And she does it. I'm like, oh, you mean like this? I know. You're like, heart emoji, bye. What was it? I know. I almost want you to pull up your phone because I'm I was like, girl, what are you doing? Like she was doing all these emojis, and he would say something like heart, love you, bye.

SPEAKER_01 29:19

I didn't say love you, but yeah, it's kind of the gist of it. So essentially what I do is brief as fuck. Yeah, I'm very brief. And so it I don't ever like to lead off with much because it makes them wonder. Oh, it makes their w minds just kind of tick around. Yeah, clearly. And so completely different when you're in person, though. Oh, uh you know what I mean. I yeah. So if I'm in person, that's I'm not like okay, see you later.

SPEAKER_02 29:47

Bye. Uh heart emoji smile, camera, action.

SPEAKER_01 29:54

Talk to you later. Peace. Maybe I should start doing that. I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 29:58

May the force be with you. Good luck. You were it was funny. I couldn't. I mean, I could have I could have wrote a cracking. I could have wrote a book on this shit. Yeah, it was so good. I was like, this is how you get dates good. I do everything I can and I get nothing.

SPEAKER_01 30:18

It's because you've got some leave them wondering. Yeah, you gotta set some mystery, you gotta set them up for that tone.

SPEAKER_02 30:25

Yeah, like just leave an emoji like pound fist and see where they come back with. How are you doing today, pound?

SPEAKER_01 30:34

Yeah, yeah. And my favorite, my favorite one. Well, I guess it's a yeah, it's a one-liner. Right on. They're like, so this is what I'm doing today, and I'm like, Right on. That's that's my favorite, like fucking ever. No, I I do say it a lot in person, but definitely like in the moment conversations. And here's the thing too, I don't give a fuck what you're doing. And I it sounds terrible, but I don't. I I don't I don't know you, so why are you telling me that you're going out on this excursion with your side-by-sides with your friends or golf tripping? Head on, dude. What do you want me to say to that?

SPEAKER_02 31:12

Have fun. Tell me if you have a boat. Do you have a side-by-side? Do you have a side-by-side? Do you have a boat?

SPEAKER_01 31:19

Do you have an arm?

SPEAKER_02 31:20

Do you have a summer home? Do you have a truck? These are things like you should you should just send emojis like a truck and then like boat and be like question mark. But it was fun. It was so much I laughed the hardest I've ever laughed in my life.

SPEAKER_01 31:41

Yeah, girl. My daughter gave us shit over that too. It was funny. Not that she she does not listen to the pod, but it just I I talked to her. She's 17, so you tell her like shit.

SPEAKER_02 31:52

Uh it was a good laugh. I laughed for a long time. Forever. But it was fun.

SPEAKER_01 31:56

So and the one friend was like, it's not even that funny. And we're like, it is this. We're fucking rolling. All night though.

SPEAKER_02 32:05

I'm still laughing about it.

SPEAKER_01 32:06

Saturday night was I could not stop giggling. I don't I don't was like in this giggle mood, and like I was just laughing.

SPEAKER_02 32:13

We've been up for night days. I mean, we'd been up part of the three nights in a row. It was our last night. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_00 32:22

We we held it together for I was delusional and I just so much fun. It was fun.

SPEAKER_02 32:29

Yeah, no, I I had to bring it up because I'm like, this is what this is how you respond to people.

SPEAKER_01 32:34

How do you get anybody? And it's so funny too because before Scarlett even said anything about me like responding back, it was the way that she was like describing like how these guys just at the boot, how these guys responding. And I was like, Oh my god, yeah, well, sound familiar here.

SPEAKER_02 32:50

Can I do that? I know, and I'm like, oh, you do that, like I hate it, like, not gonna make it, or like, I don't know, yeah, not some stuff like that. Just like if not if I'm just going on a date or whatever, but if somebody I'm like with or know really well, yeah, and they say, No, it's raining, or so yeah, I'm just like, okay, fuck off. Like, what the hell? Like, why do you like give me some explanation?

SPEAKER_01 33:18

But that's because you're female, yeah. Men are different, yeah. Explaining, but I really want you to get it, and so it just it makes them want they love that chase. Men love that chase. So if you give them that chase, why am I giving it up? Like everything up so quickly, then I don't know. Well, it didn't work out. Well, that's fine, but I'm you know, there's always search of the trade. You teach me things, I teach you things. Do I though? Yes, you do. Okay, fine.

SPEAKER_02 33:47

I mean, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 33:48

So what else have we been doing? That is gonna be an episode though, so stay tuned because we are going to go through our fucking inboxes and shit and tell you all these wild random things that these guys are saying.

SPEAKER_02 34:00

Yeah, that is gonna be a whole thing because I I mean I personally this whole time have not been on any dates, but I took a long well, you know that I took a long break. Yeah, and just recently get back on, you know, I've been butthurt a few times, so yeah.

SPEAKER_01 34:17

Which is understandable though. Yeah. I mean, if you listen to last season, like you'll especially the last two episodes, like you'll understand. Yeah, but Scarlet was really fucking left in the dry there for a hot minute, and you'll fuck that dude.

SPEAKER_02 34:31

But you know what? Fuck yeah, fuck every gut dude at this point, truly. Okay, let's do it.

SPEAKER_01 34:43

So um it's fucking human right now. We're sweating. Listen, we have to we have to turn down the air because if we don't, it's in the mics, and so we're over here sweating. So you're welcome. We're both white. We look like we did in the newspaper right now.

SPEAKER_02 35:00

Yeah, I know. Don't worry. Well, you we should recap that shit. God, we'll send it to the newspaper. We'll be like, hey, if you thought we were sweaty that night, look at this shit. Look at this. So I we went up to you, motherfuckers. So I do want to like do a brag because I did I did do something I haven't done before.

A Golf Course Hookup And A Wild One-Liner

unknown 35:24

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 35:26

I'd be fucking on a golf course. No, you didn't. Yes, I did. No, you didn't. Yeah, we did. Yeah, I know. It was pretty savage, and I was a nervous wreck because I am uh very like I love it.

SPEAKER_01 35:40

I'm even coming in between the uh she was like uh wait wait, who's coming?

SPEAKER_02 35:51

What's that noise? Hurry, hurry. I know, so yeah. Of course I was a nervous ride, so there was no coming involved for me. Yeah, but he came instantly. I was like, damn, that pussy died. Which it probably was, it been a bit shriveled up, yeah. I was like, it's all making sure she was still down there. I know, I was like, thanks for reinviting her to the party. She is alive, she's alive, she's alive, uh yeah. So that happened, and I was just like, and I was nervous about it, you know. Yeah, but anyway, we met some people on the day the golf course, and oh it was so funny. I love this story because I did this person probably was meant to be like a friend of mine past life or something. I don't know. This is old guy, and he was golfing, and I was like, he found my ball, and I was like, I don't know how you saw that. And he's like, You can call me daddy, not Ray Charles. Who said this? I did not know this guy, period. He was like probably like standing at Ray Charles. I was like, You're my person. Yeah, okay.

SPEAKER_01 37:08

And that is now going to be a quote of all times.

SPEAKER_02 37:11

We just became best friends.

SPEAKER_01 37:13

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 37:14

I mean, he sold me on. I was like, okay. So then when he sweat, he did his golfing day, I'm like, oh daddy.

SPEAKER_01 37:25

Oh, he liked it. It was fun. Oh, absolutely. Listen, golf people are the most coolest people that you'll ever fucking meet. Sure. I miss being out there on the golf course. Fuck you, motherfucker. Yeah. And I'm not gonna say your name, but you're lucky that it's but we know you. We know who you are. But yeah, so that happened. We had the three bands. Then we have we have music being going

Music Bingo Night And Bar Energy

SPEAKER_01 37:53

between that.

SPEAKER_02 37:53

Oh girl, I everybody should go to music being. Oh my god, it's so fun. Um, I honestly I felt like, which they didn't, but I felt like all the songs were catered, catered towards like our group. Yep.

SPEAKER_01 38:06

And with the one guy that was just pissed off the entire were even alive and being like, calm down. I know. It's called a B A R, a bar. So if you don't want to be in a B A R where there's loud and there's music, and lo and behold, there's music bingo going on. Yeah, so we're gonna get wild.

SPEAKER_02 38:23

We're gonna get freaking wild. Everybody have I I don't think anybody so we were asked to be back, of course. They're like, everybody was like, are you guys coming back to the next one? Are you guys gonna be back? Are you gonna be back? So I yeah, so Ivy was busy, but I went back, of course, and I loved it. I love it every minute of it. No, absolutely. I it's like seeing a band.

SPEAKER_01 38:43

Yeah, it's like yeah, but like your only person. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But no, the first the first time bingo, I actually won. I won on baby got back. Yeah, I did. Oh, yes, she did. And I went up and I shook it. I shook it, and then we went to the bar uh that the uh that the same owners that they have the music boot bingo to the other bar they owns, and this old man came up to me and he's like, Hey, you come into music bingo. He was like, You gotta sponsor it if you got it, right? And I was like, Yeah, daddy, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 39:14

Oh shit, call me daddy, not Rachel. Oh shit, that's good. No, yeah, we missed. We I we missed you. That's why I'm so sorry. I snapped her like a million times. I was like, girl, yeah, we want you here. You're my you're my person. You need to be here. I know. We are gonna have some guests. Oh, we're gonna bring that up.

New Sponsor And Upgraded Podcast Gear

SPEAKER_02 39:38

So we have a sponsor. We do have a sponsor. So proud of you. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 39:43

Ivy got a sponsor. So the sponsor, I mean, I'll talk a little bit more about it when we get more tuned. Like, we need to figure out a way to properly introduce the sponsor, but it is it's it's IO or Pulse IO, and it's an app. So ultimately, what it does is a CMMS platform where facility managed it, it's a facility management platform. It's beautiful. It's it's actually a genius, it truly is. Is it really? Yes.

SPEAKER_02 40:12

Oh man, you're blowing my mind right now. That's awesome. It sounds amazing.

SPEAKER_01 40:16

No, it's it's truly amazing. It's beautiful. So Pulse IO company did purchase our first amazing podcast equipment bundle. Yes. So thank you so much for that. We're super excited to keep you going on and and up and running. That means we uh can have guests and have guests, we have a soundboard, we can make fun little noises, we can make our own noises. Yeah, you know what our noises are gonna be. Those those sayings that we do over and over again. We're just gonna get out of there!

SPEAKER_02 40:46

No, we don't even have to say them anymore. I'll just press the button. Yeah, and now it'll be called me, Daddy, not Rick Charles.

SPEAKER_01 40:57

So all good things are coming. Uh, we actually have people that are believing in us now. I yes, surely are. So I also want to hear what everybody thought about Scarlett fucking's intro to our second season because that was badass. Oh, she was badass. It was that was amazing. It's another thing I did on the train. Yeah, it's nothing. She's like, it's fine, it's whatever.

SPEAKER_02 41:20

Yeah, no, I I've been trying to like get more creative with my stuff. But you know what? I didn't finish is the the what I was telling you about Uber

The DM Comeback And The Hookup Debrief

SPEAKER_02 41:30

guy. Oh, yeah, go ahead. Let's do it. Let's do it. I have to finish it because I don't want to keep continuing. There's always more. So I uh had wrote him off, you know.

SPEAKER_00 41:40

Not wrote him off, but wrote him off.

SPEAKER_02 41:45

Exactly. Uh so he I slid, I actually took him off everything and he slid in there, and he's like, oh DMs is what she's saying. Yeah, not sliding. Well, we anyways, and the story continues. So he like messaged me and I didn't even check it for like two days because I was like, I'm not friends with you on anything. And uh good for you though. Yeah, and good for you, yes, and I took Ivy's advice, not her advice, but her texting style for a minute.

SPEAKER_01 42:21

Love you, see you later.

SPEAKER_02 42:22

Bye, ciao.

unknown 42:24

Pound.

SPEAKER_02 42:26

I so I did because I was a bitch, cuz you want me to Uber you home? I I'll show you. Absolutely. Uh yeah, I'm not gonna just go guys love that shit.

SPEAKER_00 42:41

Okay, they eat it up.

SPEAKER_02 42:43

He they do he he did because I was like, oh man, this is probably how I should be with a lot of people. But it but then again, I'm like, that's not me. But I had to, but I had to. Okay, so he he texts me and he's you should have stayed at the bar I saw you at. And then I was like, why? Did you need to ride home? Yeah, love you by airplane, fire, yeah, yeah. I could go on and on ivy's emojis and text. So I was like, why did you need to write home? I don't think he knew how to respond at all because he was like, um, no, I I thought we could make out. I'm like, tried that, yeah. And you really tried that, didn't we?

SPEAKER_01 43:39

Yeah, buddy.

SPEAKER_02 43:40

So anyway, short story long. Short story long. It progressed from there. And the one text he did send me was, I'm in the pussy eating mood. Yeah. And I was like, Scarlet said game on. No, I said mine or just anybody's score. Yeah. And then I'm like pound. Right on. I know right on. And peace sign. And yeah, I needed all the winky face. Winky bay.

unknown 44:13

Winky Face.

SPEAKER_02 44:14

And the plum and a plant. Oh yeah. Because it's a bit compounded. I didn't let it go. It wasn't easy for him. I mean, I was a total like cunty bitch at first, because you know what? I actually wasn't interested. Yeah, I I truly was. After all that, after all that, I truly wasn't. But you can reel me in pretty easily with a pussy eating contest. Just offer to eat it.

SPEAKER_01 44:55

So it happened. The podcast. Yeah, you can come on her too, she says. Oh she no, that's fucking awesome.

SPEAKER_02 45:03

Oh yeah, no, we went to downtown and and then some. Oh, way some. Yeah. And I I was sore the next time.

SPEAKER_01 45:12

Oh, I and it wasn't even packing. No, no, it wasn't packing, but that was so that means that there was some there's a lot of play. Like, let it all out in the very first house. I clearly was not shy about it. He just said, like, she's rolling out our fucking roll, you know what I'm saying? Yeah. Yeah, motherfucker, that's what you got.

SPEAKER_02 45:34

What are you putting in my busy next?

SPEAKER_01 45:40

That's basically how water gets quick.

SPEAKER_02 45:54

Oh no, we're gonna make a shirt, just emoji of Ivy's like messages, emoji messages.

SPEAKER_01 46:02

Well then, if you got game, yeah, and don't need nothing else but emojis. Okay.

Where To Find Us And Write In

SPEAKER_01 46:09

No, but I this has been a really productive episode. I feel we kind of got you caught up a little bit. We can't throw it all out there at once. Trust me, there's a lot more. Oh yeah. This is just those six, those literally six weeks. That's what happened in six weeks. And I'm sure that as we continue all these episodes, we'll be like, but we forgot to tell!

SPEAKER_02 46:42

I'm never gonna get sick of that. I'm not.

SPEAKER_01 46:45

I know I'm not because I think it's fucking hilarious. Okay. Anyways, so well, I mean, do you want to even remember our email address or anything?

SPEAKER_02 46:57

I do.

SPEAKER_01 46:58

Okay, no, I'm just saying like as in like nothing untouched, PUD at gmail.com and write in.

SPEAKER_02 47:06

Okay, we're on every fucking everything. We're on Twitter. No, not Twitter. I've never had it. Not Twitter. Yeah. TikTok, Facebook, Instagram, I think that's it. Right on and peace out. Yeah. Pound it. Pound it. And then the stop sign injection.

SPEAKER_01 47:29

So we are we're I mean, we're on so many different things. So just tune in, listen in, share us. Yeah, give it, get back up. The contest is still out there, y'all. Yeah, if you guys want some merch.

SPEAKER_02 47:42

Oh shit, yeah. No. I mean merch with emojis. I've got the emojis on there. Like all the recent ones in her thing. Like really special.

SPEAKER_01 47:58

Never know what we'll clap. You know, like the emoji. Collab of the week. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 48:04

Oh, I love that. Collab of the week. I know we shouldn't do that because I'll put it. Okay, I'll put it on our socials. Let's go with your phone after that. And let's like, what did you use most this week? All right, besties. All right. We love you. We love you.

SPEAKER_01 48:19

Thank you so much. We miss you so much. So tune in next week.

SPEAKER_02 48:22

Hey besties. I just want to give a shout out to our first sponsor, Pulse IO. This comprehensive computerized maintenance program system is designed specifically for healthcare facilities. Streamline asset tracking, preventative maintenance, work orders, and service requests. And the best part is you can get it an all-in-one platform. All in one. Can't go wrong with that. We are going to make sure we have more information on all of our socials. And if you have questions about it, you can email us at nothinguntouchpod at gmail.com.