WEBVTT 00:00:00.640 --> 00:00:02.560 I'm not preaching on marriage. 00:00:12.720 --> 00:00:18.239 You know, in any given congregation, it's a real mix. 00:00:18.399 --> 00:00:27.839 You've got some people that are very free, and uh other people that are still dragging around a ball and chain. 00:00:29.199 --> 00:00:38.799 And my hope tonight is that we're going to cut some of these things off, and uh you're gonna leave a little bit freer than perhaps maybe when you came in. 00:00:39.119 --> 00:00:43.439 So I'm gonna be talking tonight about forgiving the unforgivable. 00:00:44.079 --> 00:00:47.600 Here's a couple of examples of the unforgivable. 00:00:49.679 --> 00:01:00.079 Most recently, July the 20th, 2012, those of you that have lived in Colorado, there was a mass shooting in a theater in Aurora. 00:01:02.240 --> 00:01:12.959 A guy goes in, he throws smoke bombs, he's got several different automatic weapons, he's killed 12 people, wounded 70 others. 00:01:13.040 --> 00:01:19.760 It was the deadliest shooting in Colorado since the Columbine High School massacre in 1999. 00:01:22.560 --> 00:01:24.319 Is it unforgivable? 00:01:24.959 --> 00:01:37.760 If you were one of those families that lost a loved one, is it possible for us to forgive a man who claims insanity today to release him? 00:01:38.799 --> 00:01:40.319 Stories of abuse. 00:01:42.079 --> 00:01:43.680 This is tragic. 00:01:44.480 --> 00:01:51.280 Violence against women and girls is one of the world's most pervasive human rights abuses. 00:01:51.599 --> 00:01:54.959 One out of three women experience violence during their lifetime. 00:01:55.120 --> 00:01:56.079 One out of three. 00:01:56.239 --> 00:01:57.920 So look around. 00:01:58.239 --> 00:02:00.239 We've got a lot of ladies here. 00:02:00.640 --> 00:02:13.919 If this gathering is a statistical norm, one out of three of these women either has or will experience some kind of violent tragedy. 00:02:14.560 --> 00:02:20.960 One in five girls and one in twenty boys are the victims of child sexual abuse. 00:02:21.599 --> 00:02:23.520 Some of you are here tonight. 00:02:25.840 --> 00:02:32.479 Human trafficking is the second largest criminal industry worldwide. 00:02:33.360 --> 00:02:43.599 In just the United States alone, there's an estimated 300,000 children that are trafficked and sexually exploited. 00:02:45.680 --> 00:02:46.960 Can we forgive that? 00:02:47.759 --> 00:02:50.080 Can we forgive the person that turns? 00:02:51.680 --> 00:02:53.680 Stories of atrocities. 00:02:54.960 --> 00:02:59.919 This was probably the most recent thing in the news, but here's what wasn't reported. 00:03:00.240 --> 00:03:03.919 Focus on the family has an office in Egypt. 00:03:05.280 --> 00:03:10.719 And the gentleman that heads up that office actually knew some of these families personally. 00:03:11.360 --> 00:03:19.199 And so his report was very, very different than what you might have seen on CNN, Fox News, ABC. 00:03:23.360 --> 00:03:38.719 On the shore of Libya, 21 young men, all of which were Christians, from impoverished homes, the majority of them married with children, were traveling to find employment. 00:03:39.520 --> 00:03:41.199 They were captured. 00:03:44.240 --> 00:03:50.479 They were told that they would be allowed to live if they would renounce their faith. 00:03:52.240 --> 00:04:08.000 Not only did they not renounce their faith, but before they were executed so brutally, they were actually singing a hymn and worshiping the Lord before the gun was finally pulled. 00:04:08.159 --> 00:04:11.439 Or in this case, actually, their throats were all cut. 00:04:13.280 --> 00:04:16.240 Can you forgive the unforgivable? 00:04:18.160 --> 00:04:20.000 What about your story? 00:04:22.079 --> 00:04:24.560 I've been in ministry for 40 years. 00:04:24.800 --> 00:04:26.240 I hope I've heard it all. 00:04:26.480 --> 00:04:28.480 I hope I've heard it all. 00:04:30.399 --> 00:04:36.480 I talk with people every day that have experienced unspeakable tragedies. 00:04:40.560 --> 00:04:52.959 Rejection, abandonment, betrayal from family members, friends, people that you should have been able to trust, who prove that they were completely untrustworthy. 00:04:55.040 --> 00:04:57.279 Betrayal even in the church. 00:04:59.120 --> 00:05:04.399 Sometimes leaders prove themselves to be incredibly weak. 00:05:09.360 --> 00:05:21.360 Many years ago, when Linda and I were planting, well, actually, it was before we planted our first church, we were in Casper, Wyoming. 00:05:22.480 --> 00:05:25.920 Boy, these things get heavy after a while, just dragging them around. 00:05:26.160 --> 00:05:35.360 And I was the youth and Christian education director, and our son was a year old, and he loved to play in drywall mud. 00:05:36.720 --> 00:05:38.800 We found him there one day. 00:05:39.360 --> 00:05:49.040 And the pastor who was very much like a father, a spiritual father, a wonderful, wonderful man of God, great marriage. 00:05:49.199 --> 00:05:53.519 I mean, really couldn't have been a better example for the two of us who were very young. 00:05:54.399 --> 00:06:00.399 And I don't know what happened, but he got crosswise with the church board and he was terminated. 00:06:01.759 --> 00:06:11.759 The way the parsonage was set up, he and his family lived on the top, and in the basement was a small apartment, and Linda and I lived in that apartment. 00:06:12.639 --> 00:06:22.480 And when the denomination assigned a new minister to that congregation, they forgot to tell him that there was someone living in the basement of the parsonage. 00:06:23.519 --> 00:06:29.600 And knowing the day when he was going to come, I was ready to greet him. 00:06:29.920 --> 00:06:33.759 He pulled into the driveway, I walked out of the basement of the house. 00:06:34.000 --> 00:06:37.759 He wanted to know who I was and why I was living in his home. 00:06:38.480 --> 00:06:44.319 And being the intuitive man that I am, I knew I was in so much trouble. 00:06:44.800 --> 00:06:50.000 But I am I'm wired in such a way that the glass is half full and probably rising. 00:06:50.480 --> 00:06:56.240 You know, I mean, if I have two or three bad hours, it's I mean, that's pretty severe. 00:06:56.639 --> 00:06:59.279 So I just, you know, I just figured, you know what? 00:06:59.519 --> 00:07:01.439 I've been hired to do a job. 00:07:01.680 --> 00:07:03.279 I work as unto the Lord. 00:07:03.439 --> 00:07:06.480 I'll do the best I can to get along with this guy. 00:07:06.959 --> 00:07:12.000 And it was, I don't know, what, six months right in there? 00:07:14.000 --> 00:07:16.160 Maybe only four, she says. 00:07:16.399 --> 00:07:22.160 After a Sunday service, one of the deacons came and said, George, Pastor would like to see you in his office. 00:07:22.399 --> 00:07:24.720 So I don't think anything about it. 00:07:24.959 --> 00:07:32.079 I go running up the stairs to the pastor's office, and I walked in. 00:07:34.879 --> 00:07:36.959 I'm gonna try not to fall off. 00:07:37.680 --> 00:07:42.240 I walked in, and the entire deacon board was there. 00:07:43.920 --> 00:07:49.839 And the pastor began to level serious accusations about my integrity and my conduct. 00:07:50.079 --> 00:07:54.800 That I was undermining his authority, that I was gossiping. 00:07:55.040 --> 00:08:00.879 I mean, and I'm standing there, and I cannot believe what I am hearing. 00:08:01.600 --> 00:08:08.079 And as I and as he's dressing me down verbally, I hear the voice of the Holy Spirit. 00:08:08.720 --> 00:08:14.879 And he says to me, submit to those who are in authority over you. 00:08:15.600 --> 00:08:19.120 And a supernatural peace came into my heart. 00:08:19.439 --> 00:08:32.879 So he continued leveling all these accusations, and when he was finally done, he said, effective immediately, you're fired. 00:08:34.480 --> 00:08:36.960 I want you to leave the church. 00:08:37.440 --> 00:08:39.919 I want you to leave the city. 00:08:41.679 --> 00:08:44.720 Linda is pregnant with our second child. 00:08:45.600 --> 00:08:51.840 We have no savings, no job possibilities. 00:08:52.320 --> 00:08:55.120 Our entire family is put at risk. 00:08:56.639 --> 00:08:59.440 And I asked for permission to speak. 00:09:02.159 --> 00:09:14.960 I said to him and to the deacons of the church, I am going to do exactly as you have asked me to do, because God has placed you in authority over me. 00:09:15.840 --> 00:09:21.120 As soon as I can figure out how to accomplish what you've asked, I will do that. 00:09:21.440 --> 00:09:29.840 Secondly, there is nothing that has been said in this room that has any thread of truth at all. 00:09:30.480 --> 00:09:43.440 And I turned around, and as I'm walking from the church office across the parking lot to the parsonage, I am shaking because I don't know how to tell my wife what just happened. 00:09:48.399 --> 00:09:55.279 On top of that, Linda and I had been praying and felt led of the Lord that we would pioneer church. 00:09:55.519 --> 00:09:58.559 This was in November when I lost my job. 00:09:59.120 --> 00:10:08.080 And we were thinking after the baby was born that we would go about 120 miles further west into Wyoming and we would pioneer church in June. 00:10:08.320 --> 00:10:12.639 So I went home and I said, Sweetheart, God has changed our timetable. 00:10:13.200 --> 00:10:16.799 We are leaving as soon as we can pack our meager belongings. 00:10:27.039 --> 00:10:30.000 Eight months pregnant and the baby was breached. 00:10:31.200 --> 00:10:37.279 So we packed up our belongings and we headed to Riverton, Wyoming. 00:10:37.360 --> 00:10:39.600 Does any anybody ever heard of Riverton, Wyoming? 00:10:39.759 --> 00:10:41.039 Okay, there you go. 00:10:42.960 --> 00:10:46.879 No place to go, no place to live, no job. 00:10:49.759 --> 00:10:51.759 Not a whole lot of choices. 00:10:52.480 --> 00:10:57.759 And here's what God enabled us to do: He enabled us to forgive. 00:10:58.399 --> 00:11:03.039 You see, you either get bitter or you get better. 00:11:04.639 --> 00:11:14.879 And I learned a long time ago, even as a young minister, that I didn't want to allow another human being to determine my relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ. 00:11:16.159 --> 00:11:18.960 If I hang on to bitterness, I'm shackled. 00:11:19.039 --> 00:11:24.159 If I hang on to bitterness and unforgiveness, I'm just always dragging something behind me. 00:11:24.240 --> 00:11:27.039 And sooner or later it's just going to trip you up. 00:11:28.960 --> 00:11:33.919 So, how do we do that? 00:11:34.480 --> 00:11:36.639 How do we forgive the unforgivable? 00:11:36.799 --> 00:11:42.799 First of all, I want you to understand what forgiveness is not. 00:11:44.480 --> 00:11:46.960 Forgiveness is not denial. 00:11:47.200 --> 00:11:50.960 When I choose to forgive, I'm not denying what happened. 00:11:51.200 --> 00:11:52.320 You know what's interesting? 00:11:52.480 --> 00:11:56.320 I can talk about this situation that happened in Casper. 00:11:56.399 --> 00:11:58.960 It was actually our first crucifixion. 00:11:59.200 --> 00:12:01.039 And it was quite thorough. 00:12:01.519 --> 00:12:03.120 And I can talk to you about it. 00:12:03.279 --> 00:12:07.759 I don't have any feelings rising up, any emotions rising up. 00:12:07.840 --> 00:12:12.080 I mean, I can tell you what happened, like I could tell you what I had for breakfast this morning. 00:12:12.240 --> 00:12:17.440 Because there's no resentment, there's no bitterness, there's it's just history. 00:12:17.919 --> 00:12:21.279 It's all it is, it's just it's just it's a piece of our story. 00:12:22.080 --> 00:12:27.120 When I choose to forgive, I'm not pretending like the situation didn't happen. 00:12:27.279 --> 00:12:29.919 I'm not sweeping anything under the rug. 00:12:30.240 --> 00:12:35.279 Secondly, forgiveness is not accepting the wrong. 00:12:35.840 --> 00:12:37.600 It's not accepting it. 00:12:38.159 --> 00:12:46.320 You know, some of the people that I talk to, they have this, they believe this lie that, you know, I actually deserve that. 00:12:46.480 --> 00:12:48.320 I don't deserve to be loved. 00:12:48.480 --> 00:12:51.039 I don't deserve to be treated with respect. 00:12:51.360 --> 00:13:00.960 People that are wounded latch on to some incredible lies that really shackle them for so many years. 00:13:01.519 --> 00:13:07.440 So when I choose to forgive, I'm not just accepting it as, well, you know, that's life. 00:13:07.519 --> 00:13:08.720 It just happens. 00:13:10.080 --> 00:13:14.960 When I choose to forgive, it's for my good first. 00:13:17.840 --> 00:13:24.080 When I chose to forgive this man, I didn't choose to forgive him so that he would feel good. 00:13:25.120 --> 00:13:29.679 I chose to forgive him so I would not be polluted in my soul. 00:13:29.840 --> 00:13:31.039 Does that make sense? 00:13:33.279 --> 00:13:37.440 When I choose to forgive, it's first of all for my benefit. 00:13:37.600 --> 00:13:39.279 It's for my benefit. 00:13:39.600 --> 00:13:42.240 Because I don't want to carry these loads. 00:13:42.320 --> 00:13:44.720 I don't want to drag these chains. 00:13:48.080 --> 00:13:52.559 When I choose to forgive, it allows me to heal. 00:13:53.039 --> 00:13:55.120 How many people here have been wounded? 00:13:55.200 --> 00:13:56.879 Can I just see a show of hands? 00:13:57.200 --> 00:14:01.519 Those of you that didn't raise your hands, talk to me after the service, would you? 00:14:07.120 --> 00:14:09.919 When you're wounded, you want to heal. 00:14:10.080 --> 00:14:15.200 I have I have a a, you know what a frequent flyer card is? 00:14:15.440 --> 00:14:16.000 You know? 00:14:16.240 --> 00:14:19.120 You know, you get so many miles and you get a free trip. 00:14:19.279 --> 00:14:23.279 I'm just about ready for a treat, a free trip to the emergency room. 00:14:24.080 --> 00:14:33.759 I don't know what it is about me working in the garage after business hours of a hospital, but I'll cut myself and I'll go in bleeding. 00:14:33.919 --> 00:14:36.799 Linda will drive me to the emergency room. 00:14:37.279 --> 00:14:40.480 And the most recent one. 00:14:41.360 --> 00:14:42.879 Oh my goodness gracious. 00:14:43.039 --> 00:14:45.039 I what can I say? 00:14:45.120 --> 00:14:47.120 I should probably stay out of the garage. 00:14:47.279 --> 00:14:49.679 You know, leave the sharp things alone. 00:14:49.919 --> 00:14:56.960 Um ended up getting 17 stitches and just a real small little place just on the tip of my finger. 00:14:57.279 --> 00:15:00.879 And uh the surgeon was so, man, he was so great. 00:15:00.960 --> 00:15:05.759 He said, you know, I had a laceration like that once, and they stitched it up. 00:15:05.919 --> 00:15:08.080 Let me show you the scar because they didn't do a good job. 00:15:08.240 --> 00:15:10.240 I'm gonna make sure you don't have a scar like that. 00:15:10.320 --> 00:15:14.320 I'm thinking, thank you, Jesus, I've got the right guy after hours. 00:15:14.799 --> 00:15:22.399 And so I submitted in it with, oh man, oh man, it was so incredibly painful because they had to wash out the wound. 00:15:22.639 --> 00:15:31.039 And so they're washing out the wound, and muscles are sticking up through the cut, and and it was all I could do to stay sitting down. 00:15:31.759 --> 00:15:40.480 Then pretty soon this the the whatever they put in there to deaden it finally took hold, and he just very calmly stitched me up. 00:15:40.559 --> 00:15:44.399 And you know, I look at that finger, and it's just fine today. 00:15:45.840 --> 00:15:48.080 You know, forgiveness works that way? 00:15:49.600 --> 00:16:12.159 When you're hurt, when somebody betrays you, when someone, you know, you you go to someone in secret, you know, you you you just need to bear your soul, and and you know, everything is supposed to be confidential, and before you know it, everybody in the office knows what was supposed to be confidential, and you're just I mean, you know what I'm talking about. 00:16:12.799 --> 00:16:19.279 When we choose to forgive, what we're saying is, God, I give you permission to close the wound. 00:16:20.559 --> 00:16:25.759 I give you permission to stop the bleeding. 00:16:26.000 --> 00:16:29.039 I give you permission to heal. 00:16:29.600 --> 00:16:35.279 When we choose not to forgive, the wound stays open and it continues to bleed. 00:16:35.519 --> 00:16:43.600 And some people have been bleeding for 10, 20, 30 years and more, because the wound is still open. 00:16:47.279 --> 00:16:49.759 We have to understand God's command. 00:16:51.360 --> 00:16:54.879 Matthew 6, 14 through 15. 00:16:55.200 --> 00:17:05.839 For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your father forgive you your trespasses. 00:17:06.160 --> 00:17:08.319 Does that seem fair to you? 00:17:12.079 --> 00:17:14.000 I mean, does that really seem fair? 00:17:14.240 --> 00:17:18.240 If I hang on to the offense, God's going to hang on to mine. 00:17:18.319 --> 00:17:20.000 Let me read that to you in the amplified. 00:17:20.160 --> 00:17:22.079 It's really, it's really good. 00:17:22.319 --> 00:17:39.039 For if you forgive people their trespasses, their reckless and willful sins, reckless and willful, leaving them, letting them go, giving up resentment, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 00:17:39.200 --> 00:17:41.039 We've got to let it go. 00:17:43.519 --> 00:17:51.759 You know, we walk around, we carry this thing, and I mean it's just hard to move when you're shackled with unforgiveness. 00:17:52.319 --> 00:17:58.720 But when I choose to let it go, when I choose to just let it go. 00:18:01.359 --> 00:18:07.200 Now here's the interesting thing about forgiveness: it's not an event. 00:18:08.400 --> 00:18:12.079 Forgiveness is a process that starts with an event. 00:18:12.799 --> 00:18:16.480 It starts with my decision to let it go. 00:18:16.799 --> 00:18:21.759 How many of you uh are still paying on your car? 00:18:21.839 --> 00:18:25.279 You're you're you're still the bank still owns your vehicles? 00:18:25.839 --> 00:18:34.400 Would it would it be cool, sister, if if Pastor Steve went to the bank and said, you know what? 00:18:34.640 --> 00:18:37.359 This is such a precious woman and we love her so much. 00:18:38.799 --> 00:18:40.880 She's she said, yeah, yeah, yeah. 00:18:41.039 --> 00:18:42.400 Go to the bank, go to the bank. 00:18:42.559 --> 00:18:45.599 Uh wherever you are, Pastor Steve, uh, beware. 00:18:46.480 --> 00:18:48.880 So he goes to the bank and he says, you know what? 00:18:48.960 --> 00:18:50.319 We just want to bless this woman. 00:18:50.400 --> 00:18:52.079 I'm gonna pay off that note. 00:18:54.079 --> 00:18:56.240 The debt has been canceled. 00:18:56.480 --> 00:18:58.000 It's been canceled. 00:18:58.720 --> 00:19:01.119 You owe nothing to anyone. 00:19:02.000 --> 00:19:04.160 Forgiveness is me tearing up the note. 00:19:04.319 --> 00:19:06.240 Forgiveness is me saying, you know what? 00:19:06.400 --> 00:19:14.559 You don't owe me an apology, you don't owe me an explanation, you owe me nothing because I have canceled the debt. 00:19:14.720 --> 00:19:20.880 I've torn up the paperwork, you do not owe me anything from this point forward. 00:19:22.640 --> 00:19:24.480 Mark 11, 25. 00:19:24.880 --> 00:19:32.160 And whenever you stand praying, forgive if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven will forgive you. 00:19:32.400 --> 00:19:36.720 If you have anything against anyone, forgive him and let it drop. 00:19:37.680 --> 00:19:39.039 Let it drop. 00:19:39.680 --> 00:19:44.640 How many times do we go to church and we are carrying so much baggage? 00:19:44.880 --> 00:19:52.400 And we stand and we worship the Lord and we put our check on the tithe box, and if you forgot to do that, it's just right outside that door there. 00:19:56.319 --> 00:19:58.079 You think I'm kidding? 00:20:02.240 --> 00:20:06.480 We come to church and we put we put on the appropriate phrase. 00:20:06.799 --> 00:20:07.759 Praise God. 00:20:08.160 --> 00:20:09.440 Hallelujah. 00:20:10.720 --> 00:20:15.359 And yet we carry incredible burdens. 00:20:16.880 --> 00:20:18.559 We carry incredible burdens. 00:20:18.720 --> 00:20:20.960 You're thinking of some of them right now. 00:20:21.279 --> 00:20:26.799 Some of those things are coming into your consciousness as I'm speaking, some of those burdens. 00:20:27.039 --> 00:20:28.720 Luke 11, 4. 00:20:28.960 --> 00:20:36.960 And forgive us our sins as we ourselves forgive everyone who is indebted to us and lead us not into temptation. 00:20:37.200 --> 00:20:41.839 You know, leading into temptation and forgiveness are synonymous. 00:20:42.319 --> 00:20:49.519 Because when I refuse to forgive, I open myself up to demonic attack. 00:20:50.079 --> 00:20:59.599 When I choose to hang on to that debt, I'm a target for the enemy. 00:21:00.640 --> 00:21:04.000 And Jesus, I'm just an old-fashioned guy. 00:21:04.079 --> 00:21:06.880 I think Jesus meant what he said and said what he meant. 00:21:07.039 --> 00:21:15.440 And I don't think it's an accident that he tied these two things together, that if you, you know, forgive and don't lead us into temptation. 00:21:21.359 --> 00:21:24.319 Thirdly, we need to understand God's grace. 00:21:25.599 --> 00:21:32.319 When I get up in the morning, this may shock you, but when I get up in the morning, I put my pants on one leg at a time. 00:21:34.880 --> 00:21:37.839 I'm just about as normal as normal gets. 00:21:38.880 --> 00:21:42.720 And my ability to forgive is not because I'm a better person. 00:21:43.599 --> 00:21:49.680 It's not because I'm more spiritual than the next person sitting next to you. 00:21:50.000 --> 00:21:55.599 My ability to forgive is God's grace working in me. 00:21:55.920 --> 00:21:59.759 When you choose to forgive, you are actually portrayed. 00:22:00.240 --> 00:22:01.759 Praying grace. 00:22:02.319 --> 00:22:12.720 The word grace means God's reflection, God's working in the life that is reflected in outward ways. 00:22:14.160 --> 00:22:16.640 See, I gave my wife my phone. 00:22:16.960 --> 00:22:22.880 If I had a flashlight, I could turn the flashlight on and I could show it to you. 00:22:23.119 --> 00:22:28.240 And you would see from the light coming out that there was a power source there. 00:22:28.480 --> 00:22:35.839 When God gives us grace, he gives us grace so that his power can shine through us, and forgiveness does that. 00:22:36.799 --> 00:22:43.359 We cannot forgive if God doesn't give us the authority and the power and the courage and the humility to do that. 00:22:43.440 --> 00:22:44.319 Because you know what? 00:22:44.480 --> 00:22:53.839 In my human nature, I just as soon take you outside and give you a few reasons why you shouldn't speak to me the way you just did. 00:22:58.000 --> 00:23:04.240 But when I open myself to God's grace, I don't want to repay evil for evil. 00:23:04.400 --> 00:23:07.039 I don't want to get even. 00:23:08.079 --> 00:23:10.880 I just want to get on with it. 00:23:11.440 --> 00:23:14.240 And I don't want to drag things behind. 00:23:15.039 --> 00:23:17.759 Philippians 4, verses 12 and 13. 00:23:18.000 --> 00:23:20.160 I know how to be brought low. 00:23:20.319 --> 00:23:21.920 I know how to abound. 00:23:22.160 --> 00:23:28.960 In any and every circumstance, I've learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. 00:23:29.200 --> 00:23:31.119 I can do all things through Christ. 00:23:31.279 --> 00:23:32.480 You know, you've heard that. 00:23:32.640 --> 00:23:35.039 I can do all things through Christ. 00:23:36.960 --> 00:23:40.799 This is the context of doing all things through Christ. 00:23:41.119 --> 00:23:49.839 Part of that is through Christ, with his grace working in our lives, we can forgive anything. 00:23:50.079 --> 00:23:52.319 We can forgive the unforgivable. 00:23:52.559 --> 00:23:55.359 We can forgive the adulterous spouse. 00:23:56.640 --> 00:23:59.599 We can forgive the abusive parent. 00:23:59.839 --> 00:24:03.119 We can forgive the person that raped you on the way home. 00:24:03.359 --> 00:24:11.119 We can forgive the unforgivable because of his grace working in our lives. 00:24:12.799 --> 00:24:21.599 Interesting story about Saul of Tarsus in Acts 7 and verses 54 through 60. 00:24:22.079 --> 00:24:25.200 Stephen was the first martyr in the church. 00:24:27.359 --> 00:24:35.599 The gentleman to the right, depicted there, is Saul of Tarsus, who later became the Apostle Paul. 00:24:36.720 --> 00:24:46.400 And he's standing there and he's viewing the execution of this man who refused to renounce the Lord Jesus Christ. 00:24:47.599 --> 00:24:50.559 This man is being stoned to death. 00:24:52.000 --> 00:24:59.839 Now, when they heard these things, they were enraged, and they ground their teeth at him. 00:25:00.319 --> 00:25:14.000 But he, Stephen, full of the Holy Spirit, gazed into heaven, and he saw the glory of God in Jesus standing at the right hand of God, and he said, Behold, I see the heavens open, and the Son of Man standing at the right hand of God. 00:25:14.160 --> 00:25:20.160 But they cried out with a loud voice, and they stopped their ears, and they rushed together at him. 00:25:20.559 --> 00:25:23.599 They cast him out of the city and they stoned him. 00:25:24.079 --> 00:25:31.200 And the witness, the witness laid down their garments at the feet of the young man Saul. 00:25:31.759 --> 00:25:36.880 And as they were stoning Stephen, he cried out, Lord Jesus, receive my spirit. 00:25:37.039 --> 00:25:45.519 And falling to his knees, he cried out in a loud voice, Lord, do not hold this sin against them. 00:25:46.160 --> 00:25:48.000 Does that sound familiar? 00:25:48.799 --> 00:25:51.200 Where have we heard that before? 00:25:51.599 --> 00:25:53.759 Where have we heard that before? 00:25:54.240 --> 00:26:07.920 When Jesus was hanging on the cross, when he was being brutally murdered because of our sins and our transgressions, he cried out, Father, forgive them. 00:26:08.640 --> 00:26:16.319 Forgive the unforgivable because they just do not understand what they're doing. 00:26:16.640 --> 00:26:19.599 Linda and I have been married for 39 years. 00:26:20.000 --> 00:26:27.839 And those 39 years, I am sad to say that there have been a number of times when I've just gotten stuck on stupid. 00:26:29.920 --> 00:26:31.599 And I have hurt her. 00:26:53.200 --> 00:27:04.480 And two and a half years into that church plant, I came home from work and my wife said, if I were not a Christian, I would take the children and I would leave you. 00:27:09.200 --> 00:27:16.480 The realization that I had wounded the heart of the person that I love more than anyone else in this world. 00:27:17.119 --> 00:27:27.279 I can't describe to you the pain in my heart, knowing that I had created such pain in her heart. 00:27:28.160 --> 00:27:30.400 She wasn't threatening to divorce me. 00:27:30.559 --> 00:27:32.880 She was trying to get my attention. 00:27:33.200 --> 00:27:36.000 You're neglecting your family. 00:27:41.599 --> 00:27:43.119 She forgave me. 00:27:47.200 --> 00:27:50.640 And the wound was closed and the marriage was healed. 00:27:55.599 --> 00:27:58.319 Lastly, we have to understand that we can. 00:28:00.240 --> 00:28:06.559 You know, you may be here thinking, but George, you just, I mean, yeah, okay. 00:28:06.960 --> 00:28:09.759 So you were a workaholic and you hurt your wife. 00:28:10.079 --> 00:28:11.359 Big deal. 00:28:13.039 --> 00:28:15.599 You don't know what happened to me. 00:28:15.839 --> 00:28:18.400 You don't know what I did to the other person. 00:28:18.559 --> 00:28:19.839 This is nothing. 00:28:24.480 --> 00:28:26.240 We can forgive. 00:28:27.119 --> 00:28:41.440 If we choose to forgive, if we choose to receive the grace of God into our hearts and lives, we can forgive the most unforgivable thing that has ever happened to us. 00:28:43.359 --> 00:28:50.160 In 2 Timothy 4, 14 through 18, the Apostle Paul is now in prison. 00:28:50.480 --> 00:28:53.519 He understands that his life is coming to an end. 00:28:56.640 --> 00:29:00.160 Alexander, the coppersmith, did me much harm. 00:29:00.799 --> 00:29:02.480 The Lord will repay him. 00:29:02.799 --> 00:29:05.680 Say, I don't have to repay people for hurting me. 00:29:05.839 --> 00:29:07.440 I just need to let God handle it. 00:29:07.519 --> 00:29:09.440 Just let God settle the score. 00:29:09.680 --> 00:29:12.079 The Lord will repay him according to his deeds. 00:29:12.319 --> 00:29:17.680 Be on guard against him yourself, for he vigorously opposed our teaching. 00:29:19.440 --> 00:29:24.079 At my first defense, no one supported me, but all deserted me. 00:29:24.319 --> 00:29:26.720 May it not be counted against them. 00:29:27.759 --> 00:29:31.440 May it not be counted against them. 00:29:32.400 --> 00:29:33.680 I'm in prison. 00:29:33.920 --> 00:29:36.160 I have given my life for the gospel. 00:29:36.319 --> 00:29:38.319 I have given my life for you. 00:29:38.640 --> 00:29:42.880 My life is about over, and I'm looking around and I am by myself. 00:29:46.559 --> 00:29:48.480 I think of Peter. 00:29:49.039 --> 00:29:56.559 They're walking, Jesus is saying, you know, Peter, I've got to go to Jerusalem and I'm going to suffer and die. 00:29:56.720 --> 00:29:57.839 It is not going to happen. 00:29:58.000 --> 00:29:59.920 It is not going to happen. 00:30:01.279 --> 00:30:06.079 They continue their conversation and he says, You know, I will go and I will die with you. 00:30:06.319 --> 00:30:09.039 Peter, you really do not understand. 00:30:10.240 --> 00:30:14.640 Before that rooster crows, you're going to deny me three times. 00:30:17.839 --> 00:30:26.160 In his cell, Paul understood what Jesus was trying to say to Peter. 00:30:27.279 --> 00:30:31.359 That he would die, and that he would probably die alone. 00:30:31.599 --> 00:30:46.720 And he goes on, but he said, the Lord stood with me and he strengthened me, so that through me the proclamation might be fully accomplished, that all of the Gentiles might hear, and I was rescued out of the lion's mouth. 00:30:48.160 --> 00:30:52.079 We can endure the unthinkable. 00:30:52.720 --> 00:30:54.240 We can endure. 00:30:56.000 --> 00:30:58.000 We can, we can endure. 00:30:59.839 --> 00:31:03.599 God will give us the strength that he gave Jesus when he was in the garden. 00:31:03.759 --> 00:31:09.759 Lord, if there's any, if there's any way for this cup to pass from me, please. 00:31:10.079 --> 00:31:13.200 But nevertheless, your will be done. 00:31:13.440 --> 00:31:19.440 Jesus' ability to forgive didn't happen when he was hanging on the cross. 00:31:21.039 --> 00:31:24.640 The grace that he received to forgive happened in the garden. 00:31:25.359 --> 00:31:28.720 Before he was betrayed with an act of affection. 00:31:30.079 --> 00:31:34.640 Before Judas pointed him out with a kiss. 00:31:34.960 --> 00:31:38.640 He had already received the grace of the Father. 00:31:41.279 --> 00:31:43.680 We can receive that same grace. 00:31:44.240 --> 00:31:46.480 We can receive the same grace. 00:31:47.440 --> 00:31:52.240 There's a woman that you may recognize, her name is Cori Tin Boom. 00:31:53.359 --> 00:31:56.720 For those of you that are as old as I am, you probably saw the hiding place. 00:31:57.039 --> 00:32:01.279 For those of you younger than 30, you may not know what I'm talking about. 00:32:02.240 --> 00:32:17.039 But Cory Tin Boom in 1947, from Holland, the Germans came in and they conquered her her country, Hitler and his army. 00:32:18.400 --> 00:32:24.640 And her parents were murdered. 00:32:25.440 --> 00:32:29.039 Her and her sister were put into a concentration camp. 00:32:30.160 --> 00:32:33.759 They suffered terrible, terrible things. 00:32:38.240 --> 00:32:44.000 The solemn faces stared back at me, not quite daring to believe. 00:32:45.119 --> 00:32:49.359 There were never questions after my talk in Germany in 1947. 00:32:49.920 --> 00:32:55.519 People stood up in silence, and silence collected their wraps, and silence left the room. 00:32:55.680 --> 00:32:57.440 And that's when I saw him. 00:32:57.759 --> 00:33:01.599 She's speaking to a group of Christians in a church. 00:33:02.240 --> 00:33:06.799 That's when I saw him working his way toward me against the others. 00:33:07.119 --> 00:33:11.039 One moment I saw the overcoat and the brown hat. 00:33:11.200 --> 00:33:18.160 The next, a blue uniform and a visored cap with the skull and crossbones. 00:33:19.680 --> 00:33:21.759 It came back with a rush. 00:33:22.000 --> 00:33:32.400 The huge room with all of its harsh overhead lights, the pathetic pile of dresses and shoes in the center of the floor, the shame of walking naked past men. 00:33:32.960 --> 00:33:40.160 I could see my sister's frail form ahead of me, ribs sharp beneath the parchment skin. 00:33:40.480 --> 00:33:42.799 Betsy, how thin you were. 00:33:44.079 --> 00:33:47.440 Now in front of me, he thrust out his hand. 00:33:48.079 --> 00:33:50.559 A fine message, Freulein. 00:33:51.680 --> 00:33:53.359 A fine message. 00:33:54.079 --> 00:34:01.039 How good it is to know that, as you say, all sins are at the bottom of the sea. 00:34:01.920 --> 00:34:11.840 And I who was, and I who had spoken so glibly of forgiveness fumbled in my pocketbook rather than to take his hand. 00:34:13.440 --> 00:34:15.760 Surely he could not remember me. 00:34:16.159 --> 00:34:18.320 But of course I could remember him. 00:34:19.519 --> 00:34:28.239 I was face to face with the one, my captor, and my blood seemed to freeze. 00:34:28.480 --> 00:34:32.480 You mentioned Ravenbeck in your talk, he was saying. 00:34:32.719 --> 00:34:34.239 I was a guard there. 00:34:37.599 --> 00:34:44.000 I know that God has forgiven me for the cruel things that I did, but I would like to hear it from your lips. 00:34:45.360 --> 00:34:49.360 Freulein, again as he puts out his hand. 00:34:50.000 --> 00:34:52.639 Will you please forgive me? 00:34:53.519 --> 00:35:01.280 As I stood there, I whose sins had again and again been forgiven, and could not forgive. 00:35:01.519 --> 00:35:03.760 Betsy had died in that place. 00:35:04.480 --> 00:35:10.239 Could he erase her slow, terrible death simply by asking, forgive me? 00:35:15.519 --> 00:35:18.480 It could not have been but a few seconds. 00:35:19.199 --> 00:35:26.000 His hand held out, but to me it seemed like ours as I wrestled with the most difficult thing I'd ever had to do. 00:35:26.320 --> 00:35:28.079 For I had to do it. 00:35:28.320 --> 00:35:29.360 I knew that. 00:35:29.599 --> 00:35:37.920 The message that God forgives has a prior condition that we forgive those who have injured us. 00:35:38.079 --> 00:35:45.199 If you do not forgive men their trespasses, Jesus said, neither will my Father in heaven forgive you your trespasses. 00:35:45.360 --> 00:35:52.159 I knew it only as a commandment of God, but as a daily experience. 00:35:52.400 --> 00:36:00.239 Since the end of the war, I had had my home in Holland, and it became. 00:36:02.079 --> 00:36:09.440 It was since the end of the war, I had had a home in Holland for victims of the Nazi brutality. 00:36:09.599 --> 00:36:13.679 Those who were able to forgive their former enemies, this is very important. 00:36:14.320 --> 00:36:20.960 Those who were able to forgive their former enemies were able also to return to the outside world and rebuild their lives. 00:36:21.199 --> 00:36:27.360 No matter what the physical scars, those who nursed their bitterness remained invalids. 00:36:30.079 --> 00:36:37.679 Forgiveness is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart. 00:36:38.000 --> 00:36:38.719 Help? 00:36:38.960 --> 00:36:40.800 I prayed silently. 00:36:42.079 --> 00:36:44.960 I can lift my hand, I can do that much. 00:36:45.199 --> 00:36:47.360 Simply supply the feelings. 00:36:49.679 --> 00:36:52.719 The problem with forgiveness is our emotion. 00:36:53.519 --> 00:36:54.960 We know what's right. 00:36:55.119 --> 00:36:57.440 We know what the scripture says. 00:36:58.159 --> 00:37:06.400 Can we do what is right because it's right, even though emotionally we want to run away and do the opposite thing? 00:37:07.440 --> 00:37:16.320 When I choose to do what is right because it's the right thing to do, regardless of how I feel emotionally, something supernatural happens in me. 00:37:17.119 --> 00:37:19.760 And I receive that incredible grace. 00:37:25.440 --> 00:37:31.519 Four ways to forgive the unforgivable: forgiveness versus reconciliation. 00:37:32.320 --> 00:37:34.800 Please do not misunderstand me. 00:37:35.519 --> 00:37:39.199 Forgiveness and reconciliation are not the same thing. 00:37:41.440 --> 00:37:49.199 I can forgive the man who put my entire family at risk because he fired me for who knows whatever reason. 00:37:50.639 --> 00:37:59.519 We cannot be reconciled until he comes to his senses and says, George, I was wrong. 00:37:59.840 --> 00:38:01.440 Will you forgive me? 00:38:01.840 --> 00:38:05.679 We cannot be reconciled with God the Father. 00:38:06.000 --> 00:38:19.840 Jesus said, Father, forgive John, forgive Mary, forgive Frank, forgive Sally, forgive those that have put me upon this cross because of their sins, forgive them. 00:38:21.199 --> 00:38:23.840 And when we say, God, will you please forgive us? 00:38:24.079 --> 00:38:26.239