Episode 3- What if the thoughts in your head aren't actually you?

Welcome to Path to Wholeness🌿

In this episode, we explore a powerful and life-changing question:
What if the thoughts in your head aren’t actually you?

If you’ve ever struggled with overthinking, emotional reactions, or feeling stuck in mental loops, this conversation will give you a completely new perspective on how to relate to your mind.

Join us as we sit down with meditation coach and author Thaisa Clapham to dive into the practice of becoming the observer—learning how to step back from your thoughts, emotions, and even the roles you identify with.

✨ In this episode, we cover:

• Why you are not your thoughts or your emotions
  
  
• How meditation helps you detach from mental patterns
  
  
• Recognizing when you’re caught in a thought loop
  
  
• Using simple tools like mantras to return to presence
  
  
• The concept of the Silent Witness
  
  
• How creating space between feeling and response transforms your life
  
  
• Understanding karma as conscious action, not punishment
  
  
• Moving from autopilot to intentional living
  
  

Through guided insight and real-life application, you’ll learn how to pause, reconnect with awareness, and respond to life from a place of clarity and alignment—rather than reaction.

🧘‍♀️ This episode also includes a short meditation practice to help you experience:

• Observing your thoughts without attachment
  
  
• Letting emotions pass like clouds
  
  
• Returning to a state of calm, grounded awareness
  
  

If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by your inner world, this episode is here to guide you back to yourself.

💭 Remember:
Your thoughts and emotions are experiences you have—not who you are.

Disclaimer: The conversations shared on this podcast are intended for educational and reflective purposes only. We encourage everyone to follow their own inner guidance, use personal discernment, and seek support from qualified medical or mental health professionals for any health-related concerns. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Welcome to Back to Holeness, your journey back to your true self. Here we explore meditation, energy, and awareness to help you live with more clarity, alignment, and well-being. In today's episode, we're exploring a powerful question. What if the thoughts in your head are actually you? This is something that can completely shift the way you experience your life, especially if you deal with overthinking, emotional reactions, or feeling stuck in the mental birds. In this conversation with Aisa Clarkman, Meditation Coach Author, we go deeper into the practice of becoming the observer, learning how to detach from the thoughts, emotions, and even the roles we identify with. We talk about how meditation helps you step out of these patterns, how to recognize them when you're caught in a loop, and how using simple tools like mantras can bring you back into awareness and presence. We also explore the idea of silent witness and how creating a space between what you feel and how you respond can completely change the way you make a decision, the energy you act from, and the outcomes you create in your life. Because when you step, when you stop reacting and start acting from awareness, everything begins to shift. So if you ever felt overwhelmed by your thoughts or your emotions, these episodes will help you come back to yourself. Let's get it. And today we're gonna talk about something that it really really helped me in my life. I'm not my thoughts and I'm not my emotions. I'm gonna put a clip so you guys can see a little bit of the meditation and understand where this comes from.

SPEAKER_00 1:42

Observe your thoughts. Without any attachment, without any aversion or attraction. You allow thoughts to come and go and visualize them being just like clouds passing by. Clouds arise and subside. Clouds are impermanent, transient. And every time you observe your thoughts coming and going, you sink a little deeper into this state of restful awareness, stripping away the illusion, Maya, that I am my thoughts. Nettie, Naddie, and realizing I am the awareness, consciousness, the observe, the observes thoughts coming and going.

SPEAKER_01 3:14

Why do we need to do this exercise every day? Why is it so important? And why do you include it in the meditation?

SPEAKER_00 3:20

Yeah, this is a timeless question. Who am I? Of course, I didn't create it. I am borrowing from the wishes and sages, and they have that path to know thyself through self-inquiry, to bring your awareness inward. Because what happens to us, Angelica, we get mixed up. We come here and we get mixed up. We believe we are our thoughts, we believe we are emotions, and we get mixed up with the subject and object. So for example, I am the subject, I am the awareness, consciousness, I'm the subject. And the object is everything that can be observed. For example, I of course I'm not my thoughts because I can observe my thoughts. If I'm on my thoughts, I'll be like with them, like I can observe then. I'll be like entangled and so mix up and so identified with our thoughts. And another layer is I am my emotions. So I get mad, I get sad, I get, for example, angry, and I get entangled. So my identity, you know, starts like mixed, being mixed with what can be experienced. So this is very important. And I want you to share your experience with that question. It's a timely, it's a timeless question during the process of meditation, but it's very important to bring that question back to your life. For example, when we are entangled, we feel very emotional one day, and we feel entangled with that emotion, we feel identified. Or for example, we feel angry. And anger is a it's a very powerful emotion, and I'm not judging any emotion because every emotion is just they are, and uh, but sometimes we have like we don't like to feel, we have an aversion, we think we're not a good person to feel angry, so we kind of reject the emotion, or if an emotion that I like it, I kind of like attract, so attraction, rejection, and we become like running away from pain towards pleasure, so we become all mixed with that. And that question I'll go back to you. How do you bring that who am I to your life and how you detach yourself from your emotions, from your thoughts, perceptions, memories? How do you do it and how meditation helps you?

SPEAKER_01 5:48

Yes, that I think that when I first started coming to meditation, from all the layers that I use and close on the meditation, that was the first thing I started to work on. And then when I will be home, I'll have a situation where I go into a loop thinking, thinking, you know, about something. And then I would think, okay, this is just a thought. And it's repeat. The first thing that I would do is identify that it was a loop. Then I will start using and practicing the things that you repeat during the meditation. When we constantly do the meditation and you're constantly repeating these things, it kind of like goes into your subconscious as well. So it's easier to repeat now these things to yourself in your daily life because it's already imprinted in the in the subconscious. So then I would say to myself, I'm not my thoughts, I'm not my emotions, and then it's my mantra, it becomes my mantra. So I'll start repeating it, and it really takes you out of that sense of identity with it, because then you become the awareness, you are now present in that moment, and you're feeling okay, I'm thinking about this, and it's causing this emotion. But then once you start repeating the mantra and you and you pull yourself back from it, you go into a point of safety.

SPEAKER_00 7:06

Yes, you detach because sometimes we feel so entangled and so mixed with that feeling, for example, that you start like thinking you are the anger. Like, for example, even in cancer patients, when they are getting like a not necessarily cancer, but when they get like a life-threatening diagnose, they have to say to themselves, I'm not my disease. It's just something that is happening to you, but doesn't define who you truly are. And the same in a regular day living, like with your thoughts, and sometimes we feel angry and we are mixed up and identified with that anger, and so detach, detach. And we have us saying, become the silent witness. Why is the silent witness? Because we are constantly judging, criticizing. If it's a thought I like, I attach. If it's a thought or an emotion I don't want, I reject. And we want to be in that place of equanimity. Like, for example, the disease is happening to me, but it doesn't define who truly I am. So it's becoming the awareness, more the witness, other than the personality. Because what happens is we are here just experiencing thoughts, sensations, memories, perceptions. They're just experiences in consciousness, but we are not them. Everything that can be an object is not a true identity. So that's why we build on you. Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Our first reaction is to answer, I am Angelica, right? I am a mother of two, I am blonde, I am from Colombia. So you see how you get identified with all the roles you play? So, but who you are truly beyond your personality, beyond being a mother, beyond your roles you play. And so that's how we want to go back and know thyself, know yourself as the witness, as the observer, as the awareness. Because these are only temporary roles. Temporary, it's like you're putting a coat, for example. Today you're wearing white. Are you your clothes? No, no, okay. It's just a layer, right? I'm wearing a colorful dress. Am I this? No, it's just a layer that today I feel like connected to do it. But I'm not identified with my dress or you with white. It's just like something you are temporarily doing or using or saying, but doesn't mean it's your true identity. And so this is how you bring this ancient question, who am I to your life? And how you start in how how do you experience when you detach, when you feel untangled, how do you experience, how do you feel? Do you feel more peaceful, quiet, serene? Tell us about when you practice that, how do you feel?

SPEAKER_01 10:12

Yeah, and I think that that makes such a big difference because once if you're in a situation, a problem, right, that you're dealing with, you become your thoughts, and you become your emotions, there's gonna be a reaction to it. And then you could create a karma, and then something comes back to you with the energy that you're putting in. So it's so important that at that moment you take a few minutes to yourself, and that's when I go meditate. And then I'm not my emotions and I'm not my thoughts. And I go back to sit there and I find that balance, and then I find in that peace a solution to whatever situation I'm facing. And now I'm making a decision from a place of safety, a place of alignment. And I know now that there is no karma being created. There is no bad consequence because I'm not acting with that type of energy.

SPEAKER_00 11:03

Exactly. Yeah, you said a beautiful word that everybody misinterpret karma. Karma means simply action. It doesn't mean punishment, it means action. For every seed you plant, there is a reaction. Like the Bible says, the harvest, the sowing is free, and but the harvest is mandatory. So you plant that seed, you're gonna harvest that. So if you want apple fruit, you plant the apple seeds. But people have misinterpretations. Sometimes they roll their eyes, oh, it's my karma. No, karma means action. So be conscious. And we have another saying in yoga, if I'm not mistaken, because sometimes I get mistaken with the uh Sanskrit, yoga sta kur karamani, establishing being and perform action. And that's exactly what you're doing in your life. You establish in your center, in your presence, in your being, and then you perform action. So between an action and a reaction, there is a pause. And that what meditation can give it to you, can give that pause button. Do I want to react unconscious, not in a place of alignment using your words? Or do I want to establish in my presence and then I perform action? When you establish in being, you are in alignment with the law of the universe. But when you react, then you create its comrade. It's just like, for example, an elastic. You pull the elastic, it's gonna come back, right? That's just it's the law, like it or not, is a law. It's a law, how the universe works. It's the law of God. So if you pull the elastic and it's gonna go back, and there's no amount of prayer or positive thinking that is gonna diminish that we uh, I mean, that force of action. It's a force of action, but of course, it's very complex, and of course, people can uh like no, um I would say not minimize, but like diminish the effect, depends because there's it's so many layers of understanding what karma means. But if you plant that seed, you put it's a force of action, it's gonna come back to you. So choose with awareness, choose with presence, choose in alignment, and then you perform an action. That's the best way to be in alignment with the law of the universe.

SPEAKER_01 13:36

Yeah, and I think that once you repeatedly do these actions, you really start learning who you are. Because now you're not just reacting, you're not living a life in you're not that you're not feeling safe, you know, always reacting and always living like that in survival. Yes, you stop being in survival mode because you're really applying meditation, you're finding yourself in these moments of peace before you take an action.

SPEAKER_00 14:07

Exactly. Yeah, because what that's another thing that meditation gives it to is this pause between the action, the stimulus, and the response. So otherwise it's autopilot. And so a lot of people are leaving on autopilot. And it's just like when you go to the doctor and they hit you on your knee, that's an automatic response. So we are robots, and what meditation can give you is this pause button. So, do I want to live my life in alignment with my true presence, or do I wanna be on autopilot? So that's question: who am I? Who am I? So, am I just an automatic reaction? And somebody's gonna press my emotional triggers and I'm gonna react. Exactly. So, I mean, you you wanna do the inner work, you wanna like the in I always love that maxim. It's know thyself, and through that you will know the whole universe and the gods because we are microcosmos of the macro. So if you know yourself, you're gonna know the universe and vice versa. So we have the law of the correspondence. So know yourself, know your true self. Truly ask the question: who am I? Who am I? Am I my autopilot? Am I my my press button, my my triggers? So do you want to just constantly live your life on autopilot, the end of the life, your life? You always have an option. There is a, I think it's a medieval statement that says the fruit can go from uh green to rotten. But being mature and establishing your being is a choice you can make every day. So make that choice. Don't go from green to rotten. Just make the choice to a conscious choice to be in alignment with your being, to be in presence, not be triggered by your all your emotional triggers, mental triggers, your loop thoughts that you you mentioned before. You want to be the master of your life and buy the only only one way to do it, know thyself.

SPEAKER_01 16:30

Exactly. You are not your triggers. I think that's so you mentioned, and I think that is something that everybody thinks that they are. You know, we go through this trauma during our childhood, and then we have all these triggers in in our bodies stored in different places, and I think that that's another subject that we're gonna we're gonna be talking about for the next episode, and it's the chat crass. So don't miss that. So, yeah, we're not our triggers. And I think that's something that we need to learn when we're trying to understand ourselves and know ourselves, is that we need to let that go. And meditation is a great exercise to let them go and really get to know who we really are.

SPEAKER_00 17:09

Yeah. So it's like peeling the layers of who you're not. For example, am I the roles I play? Am I my emotional triggers? Am I my reactions? Who am I? Who truly am I? And there is another terminology that we say in yoga, netty netty, not this, not this. So you start like by a process of elimination of who you're not. I'm not my body. The body dies, right? So we're not, I'm not my body because I am eternal. So I'm not whatever, I'm not my clothes, I'm not my dress, you're not your clothes, I'm not my body, I'm not my sensations, I'm not my emotions. Who truly am I? So go back to the source of who you are. Know thyself, do the inner work. But I mean, unfortunately, a lot of people they don't want to do the inner work. They want the magic pill. They want the quick seminar, they want to go on the weekend, get enlightenment and two-day weekend. So it's this is a journey of a lifetime. It's not something you're gonna press a button and you're just gonna be enlightened. I would question everything and every person that says that in that for you to do that route. Use your intelligence. Intelligence exactly means that to discern, use your discernment. That's the best intelligence. Does this sound right? There's no quick fix, it's a journey of lifetime. You're gonna be asking all your life, who am I, who am I? You're gonna detach, detach, detach, detach until one day you go to the truly source of who you are. We right now we have glimpses. You glimpse here, oh great. Then you glimpse, then until we become, I'm not at that stage, I'm not the establishing completely all my life in being, but I have glimpses of being, and they're amazing. It's you feel unbounded when you're in that state.

SPEAKER_01 19:11

Yeah. And if you guys want to know more about path to wholeness, that is the reason why we're having this podcast. We're teaching you how to be in that journey, how to get there. So follow us for more tips. Uh, we will be talking about so many different things that you can apply to your journey and get to be who you really are.

SPEAKER_00 19:31

Yes, namaste.

SPEAKER_01 19:33

And that's today's episode. We hope this helps you see that your thoughts and emotions are experiences you have, not who you are, because the moment you create that space, the moment you step into awareness, you move out of reaction and into conscious action. And that's where real change happens. That's where you stop creating patterns unconsciously and start choosing over responses from a place of clarity, presence, and alignment. This is the beginning of truly knowing yourself, not through the roles you play, not through your thoughts or your past, but through your awareness. And if this resonated with you, feel free to share with someone who may need this perspective. And if you have questions about meditation, awareness, or anything you would like us to talk about, leave them in the comments. We will love to include them in future episodes. Thank you for being here with us on Path to Holiness. Remember, this journey is not about becoming someone new, it's about returning to who you truly are. Take what resonated, integrated into your life, and trust your own process. We'll see you in the next episode.