Her Past Didn't Disqualify Her- It Prepared Her.

Sometimes healing starts with a moment you can't unsee.

She looked in the mirror and saw the truth her mind had been trying to silence.

And in that moment — something shifted.

Some people hit rock bottom and stay there. But then there are people who hear something deeper — a voice that cuts through the noise, through the pain — and choose to rise.

Our guest Dawn C. Ewing has a story that will stop you in your tracks. She's been through things most people wouldn't survive. And what she did next?

Nobody saw it coming.
 Have you ever heard that still small voice in your darkest moment? Drop it below. This is a safe space.
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You Don't Know What I Been Through — but we're figuring it out together. 

#YouDontKnowWhatIBeenThrough #GodsVoice #AddictionRecovery #HealingIsPossible #FaithOverFear #RealStories #HealingJourney #Transformation #FromSurvivalToStrength

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:00

Either the way I was feeling, either I was going to kill myself or kill somebody else.

SPEAKER_01 0:07

Wow. I just can't say enough about how grateful I am for um just the healing that you've done within yourself because it's kind of hard to sometimes we don't see how that just reverberates out into society and how that just think about all the people that you have impacted just because you decided to change and you decided to heal and you decided to, you know, become a better person for yourself, for your children, and for your community.

SPEAKER_00 0:36

They know if they told me who said it, I'm going right to them. Hey, what's up? Yeah, so that's that's big of you. But like you say, pull them up on charge. Pull them up on charge. You got to. People be like, man, you can't address everything. You're right. But when my name is involved, I'm addressing it because all I got is my word, my character, and who I am. My name for real. What's up, y'all? It's another episode with yours truly, Georgie the Mentor.

SPEAKER_01 1:07

And I'm Steph Harmony.

SPEAKER_00 1:09

And you are tuned in to the You Don't Know What I've Been Through podcast. We welcome y'all back to another powerful episode of You Don't Know What I've Been Through. Where we sit with survivors, not statistics, where we talk real, talk raw and honest about pain and everything. You feel me? Because you know, as we always say, you gotta be yourself. And when you're going through something, you gotta be authentic. Thank you. Because I was gonna say your authentic self.

SPEAKER_01 1:32

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 1:32

And when you going through some things, you gotta be real, real with yourself in order to elevate and grow. And um uh she, you know, we gonna rise from it. So today's guest is living proof that the beginning doesn't determine your ending, right? So um it's a woman, the lovely woman. Um she grew up surrounded by addiction and poverty. Her father was an alcoholic. She battled her own demons with drugs and alcohol. She watched her children grow um go through the criminal justice system. And at one point, maybe it seemed like a cycle would never break. Sure. But she did break it, y'all. She did.

SPEAKER_01 2:10

She broke it, and not only did she overcome, but she stands in the courtroom as a criminal defense attorney fighting for people. Yes. Or I'm walking the very paths she once walked.

SPEAKER_02 2:23

Either I was going to kill myself or kill somebody else.

SPEAKER_01 2:33

Healing is a journey. It's not something like, oh, I'm a rod.

SPEAKER_00 2:41

You don't know what I've been listening to. Everything that I've been through, I've been through. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 2:54

Let us welcome, give it up for Don C. Ewing. She is a fierce warrior in heels, placks, boots, sneakers. Um, all of that. All of that. Look at that. All of that. She is a healer with a JD, a law degree.

SPEAKER_03 3:16

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 3:17

A woman whose story will shift the way you think about justice, motherhood, and redemption.

SPEAKER_00 3:23

And y'all, she will correct you in a minute.

SPEAKER_01 3:27

In love.

SPEAKER_00 3:28

Yes, thank you. In love, she will definitely correct you, y'all. So we go this moment been through some things. A minute, we're gonna get it right into it.

unknown 3:38

That was hilarious.

SPEAKER_01 3:39

I don't know the face, but I like that one too.

SPEAKER_00 3:45

So, so so let's start from the beginning, Dawn. Because I remember I call I said Dawn, right? And she was like, uh uh, before I could say anything else, she was like, No, no, no, no, no.

SPEAKER_02 3:55

Don't Dawn. There is no, oh.

SPEAKER_00 3:57

See, Dawn. Dawn.

SPEAKER_02 3:59

Okay, y'all get it right. So um practice makes permanent.

SPEAKER_00 4:03

Um so what was life like for you growing up?

SPEAKER_02 4:07

Couldn't wait to grow up. Um my dad, as you said, was an alcoholic. He was abusive too. I've got the scars to prove it. Extension core web. Um about that. But he was a great guy when he was sober. So I longed for the day when as an adult I had I could have a conversation with my sober dad. But he died a drunk. So we never had that.

SPEAKER_00 4:35

Sorry to hear that. My condolences. That's tough. Yeah, I'm sorry to hear that. That's tough. That's real tough. That's tough. So, what do you remember most about your childhood home? Where you grew up at?

SPEAKER_02 4:46

Um, I grew up on the south side of Chicago. My mother worked most of the time. My father worked when he could. Um, and I'm the oldest sister in my father's second set of children. He was married twice. So naturally I had to do the cooking and the washing and the taking care of everybody while um mom was at work and daddy was wherever he was.

SPEAKER_03 5:12

Right.

SPEAKER_02 5:13

So um I grew up, I didn't really have a childhood. So but um it was okay because it helped me to develop develop what I needed to have to be able to sustain myself in this life.

SPEAKER_00 5:33

For sure. I can I can definitely relate to that because for me, although my childhood was full of survival, hustle, like my mom taught me how to hustle. She sealed or used to seal. Right, used to back in the day. OG don't do that no more, man. Mama, what's up, baby?

SPEAKER_02 5:54

Now, look, I could defend it.

SPEAKER_00 5:58

Mama good, mama good. She good, but she sold everything, like from plates to drugs to candy. Like, we just and for us being with her, it taught us how to hustle. That's why I got my hustle from. Not my pops. My pops was working jobs, always had a good job. But for my mom, for the hustle I got, for the ambition, it came from my OG. So I could definitely relate to that. Definitely relate to that. So with your father being who he was and you're yearning for that, like now I want to talk to my pops when he's sober. Even when he came around the times when you were young, what was that relationship like?

SPEAKER_02 6:37

Um, well, it was good because he wanted when you say it came around.

SPEAKER_00 6:43

Yeah, when he was like in your life coming around when he did, when you knew where he was at, or he came to the crib and was like, hey, baby girl, type shit.

SPEAKER_02 6:49

Yeah, he wanted us to sing all the time. Really? Okay. So you just done the single rest of it. No. I just said he wanted us to sing. I didn't say anything about a bit of a fair, fair, fair, fair. And then you know what? There was this poem on the wall. It said, I do my thing, you do your thing. I'm not in this world to live up to your expectations. You are not in this world to live up to mine. You are you, and I am I. And if by chance we find each other, it's beautiful. Wow. I like it.

SPEAKER_00 7:18

And then I added, if not, hey You added your own to the center that it's crazy. How did you remember that? Because you said it so effortlessly, like I did.

SPEAKER_02 7:28

Because it was it was hanging on the wall every single day.

SPEAKER_00 7:32

So you ain't had no choice but to read.

SPEAKER_02 7:33

It's right question your mind. Right. It is, it is, and I'm very surprised that I was able to say it that way. Because I'm almost 60.

SPEAKER_00 7:42

Don't listen, I am You don't even look like it though.

SPEAKER_01 7:46

That's why I say don't get the line. You just got here. You're gonna get the line on this podcast. You know what Dawn Dawn.

SPEAKER_00 7:54

You just got it for real. That's dope.

SPEAKER_02 7:57

But before we leave from the poem part, yeah, because I'm a poet. So that was very strategic, you know, to and then Maya Angela was one of my favorite people. Yeah. So there's a poem that I used to know how to recite from her. So that was something that was just ingrained.

SPEAKER_00 8:14

I like that. One of my things, what'd she say? One of my favorite ones, when people show you who they are, believe them, believe them.

SPEAKER_03 8:23

Y'all, the first time, okay. Straight up.

SPEAKER_00 8:27

No second, third, none of that. Like I tell people all the time. So with my siblings, like I it's six of us all together. But um, and shout out to my siblings, Taylor, Terrell, Fontaine, Jaquita, Janita, and my siblings love them to death. Shout out, but with my oldest brother, he be like, Man, you always gotta give him another chance, man, type stuff. And I'd be like, bro, no. When they show me who they are the first time, bro, I believe them because they'll do it again. And so throughout the years, he got a he's a tourist. Same birthday as Steph Harmony, he's a Taurus. His heart is so pure. Like, he would give you his last. And I used to tell him, like, bro, stop doing that, man, for real. Because when you do that and give people second and third chances, they feel like, okay, I can get over on him. But if you, and even if you do something to somebody, you know what I mean? Like, and you get go back to him and be like, we back cool, they gonna always remember you did this to me, bro. Like, I don't care what's going on, you're gonna bring it up. So I'm glad you said that because that's exactly how I am, for real. So, how did poverty and addiction show up in the household?

SPEAKER_02 9:39

So they there's a saying, money can't buy you love, right?

SPEAKER_00 9:43

Yes, it is.

SPEAKER_02 9:44

Well, it can't buy happiness if you don't have it.

SPEAKER_00 9:46

Hello.

SPEAKER_02 9:47

So there was always a yearning for something.

SPEAKER_00 9:50

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 9:51

And when you are in a condition where you cannot do for yourself or for the people that depend on you, yeah, um, that creates a a depression. So all of those things are connected, poverty, depression, and the byproducts of those can be violence. Um harming yourself or others. So and that's where my poetry came from. Um, either the way I was feeling, either I was going to kill myself or kill somebody else. Wow. So God said, just right. Just right. Right, yeah. Write your way out of this shit.

SPEAKER_00 10:38

That's what I do by me being an artist. Because I grew up myself an outcast. Like a lot of times when my cousins, friends, guys used to go and do things, they couldn't provoke me to do it. But it was just a spirit in my spirit, like, yeah, nah, I ain't doing that, that ain't right. So I I feel exactly where you're coming from on that part. I ain't never trying to kill myself. I'm just saying, like, I never thought about through the years of me doing what I do and believing in myself, I always thought, damn, don't nobody believe in me. Like, people supposed to believe in me. And then I went to jail, and in jail I learned, so people used to say all the time, expect the best, prepare for the worst. Right. I flipped that shit because I don't know. I expect the worst and I prepare for the best. The reason why I respect the worst, I mean expect the worst is because my whole life, whatever I had, it was like to me the best of. My first gun, it was the best gun. My first car had when I was 18, 19. It was a Mercury Sable, but it was a good, nice car. So my thing was I wear my heart on my sleeve. So if I expect something from somebody and it don't be up to that expectation, I get mad. And I'm a Gemini. So it's like Chucky. You know what I'm saying? So I expect the worst and prepare for the best. So I could definitely relate to you on that, Steph. Anything you can relate to because you over there like, mm-hmm, you ain't innocent. He was not innocent in this situation.

SPEAKER_01 12:17

I mean, you know, I um definitely um expect. I mean, I I I I try not to expect much from anybody. So I I think I I look at it a little different just because I just protect my energy. And so it's like, you know what, you're gonna be who you are, just like my angelou says. Yes, for sure. People show you who they are the first time, believe them. And so if that's what it is, listen, that's what it is. I have to learn to accept it because that's my journey of unconditional love and trying to master that because I'm nowhere near there, unconditional love. That's that that takes a lot. Um, but one of the one of the things about love is just being able to accept where people are. So um, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:00

That's tough. Yeah, that's deep. So Miss Dawn, you know, oh, in her name, y'all know big name, right? So, whatever moments in your life, or you know, with the things you was going through that you felt like people didn't see you, like I'm standing right here, or you don't see my potential.

SPEAKER_02 13:18

Absolutely. So the way my mind works, when people are talking, I get a vision of something. So this is what I just visualize. Um it's my mother's funeral. And I told you I'm almost sick. So we're gonna try to work this out. But one of them, we're gonna work. One of them, um, my brother and I were at the house waiting for someone to come and take us to the funeral home after the funeral. How do you leave the folks' kids in the house while y'all go bury the people?

SPEAKER_00 13:50

Wow, that's crazy. Wait, wait, wait. That's like a physical, like, you don't see me. Y'all just left and didn't. It remind me of Home Alone for real. Like, Kevin! You know, like that's crazy though. And so what was like after that? How did they find out? Or did they even care to know? Like, where's Dawn? So it was like nothing happened.

SPEAKER_02 14:18

I guess they had a repass somewhere.

unknown 14:21

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 14:22

That's weird.

SPEAKER_02 14:23

But we weren't there.

SPEAKER_00 14:24

Yeah. So so did you dream about so okay, so I know what you've been through made you who you are. Did you have dreams about becoming who you are before even what you've been through?

SPEAKER_02 14:37

I always wanted to be an attorney.

SPEAKER_00 14:40

Really? But always. That means you were argumentative.

SPEAKER_02 14:44

That means I always if nah, see, here we go again. Okay, is the vision. Um Craig ate the grapes. That's my brother. Okay. But daddy said, Y'all not going to bed till y'all tell me who ate these grapes. So I had stuff to do the next day. So I said I ate the grapes.

SPEAKER_00 15:04

Oh, the what took my for the team. Yes, definitely.

SPEAKER_02 15:07

I took many for the team. Wow. Because the team was shaving.

SPEAKER_00 15:15

And you know what? How old were you? Do you think you were at that age? Grammar school. And you know what's amazing? At that age, you took accountability for something that you didn't even do. That deserves an applause. Cause like, nah, for real, because you don't, you don't, it's grown people that's older than us that do not take accountability for their actions. I be in the streets and I like somebody'll say something like, yeah, Drill, you know, he shay C She. He he say, she say, Drill did this, drill said that, so when it comes to me, because they know somebody that knows me, gonna tell me, I be like, Who you to who said it? Oh man, I ain't gonna tell you, man. You know, I say, okay, well, I'm gonna tell you this. If you ain't gonna tell me who said it, don't even tell me what's going on. But they know if they told me who said it, I'm going right to them. Hey, what's up, family? Yeah, so that's that's big of you.

SPEAKER_01 16:11

Or like you say, pull them up on charges.

SPEAKER_00 16:13

Pull them up on charges. I got to. People be like, man, you can't address everything. You're right. But when my name is involved, I'm addressing it because all I got is my word, my character, and who I am. My name for real. So yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:28

So Dawn. We're not gonna always think for that. Get it right, get it right. Dawn, that was beautiful.

unknown 16:35

Oh, thank you.

SPEAKER_01 16:36

I'm gonna say Dawn. So uh you mentioned your dad being an alcoholic, and eventually um you've started battling addiction yourself. Can you uh just kind of talk about how that began?

SPEAKER_02 16:48

Um, in seventh grade, I smoked the joint. Um, he drank vodka. And my thing was gin in high school. So she was walking around. They didn't have uh those little detector things and what have you walked into the school so I could have my half pint of gin in my purse. Nobody knew for a while anyway. Yeah, so but yeah, that was um just a way of life. We smoked weed and drank in grammar school into high school and through. So in my 20s, by the time I was in my twenties, um, both of my parents had passed and we were um losing the house. And it actually at that okay, let me go back. We talking about addiction because we weren't talking about giving up the child that I had after my parents died. We were talking about um addiction. So I didn't know anything, and I wish my dad had known also about treatment.

SPEAKER_03 17:57

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 17:57

Knew nothing about it. So I remember um being in that house and we had a home on ADF and Jeffrey. And I just walked past the mirror and I heard God say, look at yourself. So I look in the mirror and I see this neck, because I smoked cocaine as well. Um, not crack. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 18:18

Okay. So man, okay, shit. Hey, look, I told y'all she the master correcting people, and then nobody even said that. Straight up.

SPEAKER_02 18:30

Okay, so um I I have this, you know, long flowing hair now, not then, you know, patches here, patches there, yeah. Snake-like neck, and I just looked at myself, oh and that was it. I stopped smoking, okay.

SPEAKER_00 18:46

Wow. But you you can't tell me the power of the of the mind. If you want to stop doing something, then you could do it.

SPEAKER_02 18:52

Well, people, I I'm not gonna say it that casually, yeah, because there have been some other struggles. Um alcohol wasn't that s that easy. Okay, weed wasn't that easy, right? And many people do have to go to treatment. And if I could, if I had known something about treatment, oh yeah, uh I hope I hope that I would have taken it back.

SPEAKER_03 19:13

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 19:15

So with when you were uh was it when you started, was it like a kind of like a sudden when you used to talk about d drinking the alcohol, smoking weed? Was it kind of like a sudden thing or was it like a gradual thing? Like how did how did that materialize over like your childhood?

SPEAKER_02 19:32

Um Well, I I can't remember the very beginning of it. But I have an older brother. Um then we were the neighborhood people hang out type of thing. Um And it was just there.

SPEAKER_00 19:49

It was just like a hobby. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 19:51

Right. It was like normal, exactly. Okay. And were you using it to kind of like, was it just kind of like um to cope with something, or was it just something that was just like like you said, just normal was there and then you just ended up liking it?

SPEAKER_02 20:05

Well, during childhood, it was fun, you know. Right. Um but then when you have to figure out how to purchase these things. Oh yeah. Oh, yeah, that's something else. And then when you are truly into addiction and you don't have a job to support your habit, you're gonna figure out something. So at times it was fun, other times it was um, you know, just trying to figure it out. And I even and I'm not gonna put everything on the dealer because I I I'm having a vision again. Yes, um, trying to hold on to the house, so-called. Um, we only owe $17,000 on it. So I figured, hey, I'm not getting high anymore. I can sell this stuff and we can pay for the house. But that didn't, that didn't it.

SPEAKER_00 20:48

She tried to become the dealer, y'all.

SPEAKER_02 20:50

Yeah, that but it didn't work because I had compassion. And there's another vision. Yeah. So the people that you see um, you know, swaying and carrying on on 79th Street, um, on the first of the month, they lining up at the back door all happy and everything. I'm like, no, I'm I can't I can't do this.

SPEAKER_00 21:07

Right, yeah. Like this is not me. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 21:10

So it's needless to say we lost the house. But hey, I kept my something.

SPEAKER_03 21:15

Yeah, you did, for sure.

SPEAKER_01 21:17

Wow. Um, so did did it have any effect on your relationships um or just anything? Yeah, any any of impacts on your relationships?

SPEAKER_02 21:28

Absolutely. Um my I mean when you're see my mom had passed by then and my father was still living in the house and I'm still just running out chasing the stuff. And um I left my oldest son at home and I came home one day and he was sitting on the porch. My father had to put him out. He was three or four.

SPEAKER_00 21:53

Wow, that's so you know, when you when that's your focus, yes, but nothing else is. For sure.

SPEAKER_02 22:00

And you know, I I did some stealing. I stole from my grandmother. Um I did some stealing. I put Favor out of business. Y'all remember Favor shit? Hey. Yeah, so it affected um my relationships with people. All kinds of people. People I didn't know and people I did.

SPEAKER_01 22:23

Did you ever feel like um what what was the I guess what was the breaking point for you? Did you did you ever feel like, you know, this is just what it is and this is just what it's gonna be, and I don't, you know, I'm just kind of a prisoner to this? Or is it was it was there something that kind of eventually broke through to help you kind of overcome?

SPEAKER_02 22:43

Well, for me, it was just truly the grace of God just allowing me to come face to face with myself and who I had become. Um, so like it was the stages, the cocaine was first, and then the alcohol, um I did a little fighting and carrying on and uh acting a fool, so there was a lot of volatility. And when I I reached the vision. Living on 89th and Ashland, um I don't remember exactly what happened, but it was just at that time I had um three children at the time. One of them I had already been allowed to go into to be adopted. And I'm just looking at my life and wondering, is this all there is? Can I be something else? And so that's when I stopped and no, let me tell the truth I was pregnant and I decided to stop drinking, but not until you know, later on in the pregnancy. So the thought of, you know, what am I doing to this child? Right. So I mean things there's not I can't just say that there was just one aha thing. Right. Because it was too much going on all the time.

SPEAKER_01 24:02

Yeah, that's that's real. I mean, things aren't just like boxed boxed in, so it's very complicated, complex, but it sounds like at some point you, you know, you you you definitely took that accountability and just was like, okay, what am I doing here? Right. And took those steps. So that's I mean that's amazing.

SPEAKER_00 24:20

Um for real, for real. You know how many people I be around people every day. I ride down a block in my hood and I tell I'll call somebody and be like, bruh, they still standing right here every day, standing right here doing the same thing, drinking. Seven hours later, I'm getting off work, I ride through the hood, they doing the same thing. So sometimes it's hard to break addiction every day. So for you, I I definitely commend you for that.

SPEAKER_02 24:49

To God be the glory.

SPEAKER_00 24:50

For sure. Cause me knowing you like the other day, I've never would have imagined, you know what I mean, you having this story. Or any you've been through anything. You don't know what I've been through. You feel me? Again, why we got this podcast, it's so needed. You know what I mean? So I appreciate you for that, Miss Dawn.

SPEAKER_02 25:09

Well, thank you for having me. And thank you for saying my name correctly. We'll never never forget.

SPEAKER_03 25:18

Straight up.

SPEAKER_00 25:19

On the real. So when when you knew I this is rock bottom, um over it. Like I heard you speak on you the adoption with you know stuff like that. Can you is that when you hit the rock bottom part, or was it before or after?

SPEAKER_02 25:40

I don't want to hold up the show trying to remember. I honestly I can't really say what that day was. It was a series of things.

SPEAKER_00 25:52

Oh, okay, okay, okay.

SPEAKER_02 25:54

Perhaps um maybe wanting to be somebody. Yeah. You know, having all these children and um uh this is vision.

unknown 26:06

I love it.

SPEAKER_00 26:07

Right, the vision. I like it.

SPEAKER_02 26:10

The commercial no, you know what? There was two of them. Okay, one of them said, This is you, this is your brain on drugs, something. Yes, I remember that. I remember that. And then there was another one that said, just because you survived, meaning your children.

SPEAKER_00 26:24

Ooh, I know that one.

SPEAKER_02 26:26

Now that was that was the one. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 26:30

Reality check.

SPEAKER_01 26:31

Yes, for real.

SPEAKER_00 26:33

That was a real reality check. And then they had another one, dare to be different. The D-A-R-E. Yeah, yeah, we was growing up in a time where I believed in that. For real, for didn't understand it though, because I was young. Yeah, but I used to see it all the time. And then I remember on New Jack City, you know, when they was doing the little drugs and stuff, and I see that the kids was like, um, whatever they were saying, the little chant, and that's what I was thinking about there to be different. Like for real. You do not look like what you've been through.

SPEAKER_02 27:02

Glory to God.

SPEAKER_00 27:05

He said, Glory to God. You gotta let me see straight out of it.

SPEAKER_02 27:12

Let me see what you see. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 27:15

So in in your processor, like the things you been through, okay. You you went through the fire, you came out the fire a little bit. Was it people that stuck with you through that, or was it people that was like, ah, sh she going through whatever she going through? I'm gonna just leave her where she at.

SPEAKER_02 27:34

Unfortunately, there were not people. Um my both of my parents had siblings. Well, I can't say they were. Because my uncle and um his wife and their children did kind of they embraced us.

SPEAKER_00 27:53

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 27:53

Um, and when I say us, my children and I. Um my grandmother was always there.

SPEAKER_00 27:58

Grandmas are usually there. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 28:01

Even though I stole from her. She loved you regardless. She didn't know.

SPEAKER_01 28:10

Somewhere, somewhere deep down.

SPEAKER_00 28:12

Still say she stole in love.

SPEAKER_01 28:16

No, I said she loved her regardless.

SPEAKER_00 28:18

No, what I'm saying is you remember how you be like, we cry.

SPEAKER_01 28:23

Oh, yeah, she stole love.

SPEAKER_02 28:24

No, that was nothing about in love. I just wanted what I needed.

SPEAKER_00 28:27

She needed what she needed at the time.

SPEAKER_02 28:29

I wanted what I needed, I needed what I wanted. But you know, those people passed away. Right. So at a at a certain point, no, there wasn't, you know, really people that I could rely on. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 28:39

For real. That's that's crazy. Because it takes a village. We hear this all the time.

SPEAKER_01 28:43

Yeah, definitely.

SPEAKER_00 28:44

Take a village to raise a child. I remember growing up too. It used to be, it takes a village to raise a child. But I was young, right? No, like, oh, I got a little church thing going on. You know, um, but me, me, me, me, me. I was in the choir at church. Like, we ain't gonna talk about this ain't about me though. Uh, but I used to hear that song when I was a shorty, and I I know I was in elementary school, and I used to hear that, and it used to resonate with me. It takes a village to raise a child all the time. And um, you know, I went to grammar school, Curtis uh Elementary, 115th Estate, Wild Hunters, baby.

SPEAKER_02 29:22

Right, right.

SPEAKER_00 29:23

I used to hear that song.

SPEAKER_02 29:25

No, that's not okay. Sorry. No, that's Sunday.

SPEAKER_00 29:27

I mean, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's sun gay. Sun gay. That's sun gay. But I used to hear it, and then it used to, it used to just resonate as a young, and I didn't know what was going on. My spirit just was like, it used to just go with it like it takes a village. Because it really does take a village. So, um, faith. The faith therapy, things of that nature. Like, were you like in going to church then? Stuff like that. Like, how did that play a role?

SPEAKER_02 29:53

Uh, what's the lady's saying name to say, and I was high every day?

SPEAKER_03 30:03

No, you need to stop. Wait, so I was high every day.

SPEAKER_02 30:13

No, no, no. Yes, I absolutely went to church. Church people, if y'all are listening, we so sorry for all those lines. But we appreciate the food and the money.

unknown 30:27

That's great.

SPEAKER_02 30:30

Thank you, Jesus, for deliverance. Thank you, Lord. Hallelujah.

SPEAKER_00 30:36

Lord, my love. I mean, you had to do what you had to do.

SPEAKER_02 30:38

I didn't have to do that. But it was done. But it was done. But thank you, Lord, that there is deliverance. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 30:45

Well, so question.

SPEAKER_02 30:47

Because you know what? Yeah, had it not been for going in and out of all of those churches that I joined, um, I would not have been getting the little here and the little there area.

SPEAKER_00 30:58

Yes, yes, yes. The seeds were floating. So while you were doing that now, because I know you're gonna tell the truth. Did you know better?

SPEAKER_02 31:09

Of course.

SPEAKER_00 31:09

Oh, yeah. You was a straight gangster. She was just on the Jeep.

SPEAKER_02 31:19

Thank you, Lord, for deliverance.

SPEAKER_03 31:22

Low.

SPEAKER_00 31:24

Amen.

SPEAKER_02 31:25

Watch Moody so I can shout.

SPEAKER_00 31:30

Well, I'm happy you were delivered. Thank you, Lord.

SPEAKER_01 31:35

So I'm I'm I'm really looking to get into this, the redemption part, but before that, um want to talk about one of the hardest parts of your story um is that your children also ended up in the prison system. And um just wanted to ask, how did that affect you just as a mother um and then also as a woman in recovery?

SPEAKER_02 31:55

Um, so I have eight children. Seven of them have been arrested, six have done time in county, two have been in prison twice, one of them three times, and they just handed him 15 years. Wow. Um, and he's the one that I did not raise. I sent him to Florida to be raised by family members when we were in the process of losing the house and all of those things that were going on. Um and I shared a a little while ago that sometimes I have you know what, I think I'm kind of getting over that now. But um 15 minute conversations. You know, it's when he when they would call, because my youngest um went to prison how many times I just said. And so when they would call, it would be, Well, how you doing? Um, what's going on there? And everything's going on here, and you know it's like quick hits, like so. It took me a while to just learn how to settle in to have a conversation. So I'm still kind of too. So excuse me if I jump in while you're talking.

SPEAKER_00 32:57

No, you good. Shit. This is this this is what you do. You showing me who you are.

SPEAKER_01 33:02

You're healing. That's that's that's that's like a because having to be quick like that on your toes and like I gotta get it all in. Like, that's a nervous system disruption. I'm I'm big on, you know, things that just there's so many things that impact our nervous systems that we don't even realize. And so right now, what what I'm hearing is that you're rebalancing, you're balancing, and you're healing. And so that's that's great and that's authentic. And we're here with you on that journey. So much. Thank you so much.

SPEAKER_00 33:27

I love that you said that I'm getting over it now. Like that's that's huge too.

SPEAKER_02 33:33

Yeah, and you know, I just had a vision.

SPEAKER_00 33:35

What is it? Please let's go with these. You know what?

SPEAKER_01 33:39

Vision, vision, you don't know what I've been through.

SPEAKER_02 33:41

So listen, yeah, I'm I'm just gonna be transparent because this is my story. Absolutely. Um, I got married in 1989 and I got divorced last year. Damn. So there's a whole lot of um newness about me. That's crazy. Um I'll just leave it at that.

SPEAKER_01 34:01

That's because it's I mean, only if you want to leave it at that. Um I think it's okay. Okay, she's we are here for you. This is you.

SPEAKER_02 34:11

But you know, so he had he for most well, half of the marriage he was um addicted to and now his was crack. So, and then alcohol as well. Hey, that's my story because he sold my stuff. Well, so that's enough of that.

SPEAKER_00 34:30

Okay, we're gonna do that. Damn, fam. Return that stuff.

SPEAKER_01 34:37

You wild shit.

SPEAKER_00 34:45

Hey, look. Sorry. It's my story. It is those stories. Definitely. Wait, wait, wait, hold on, wait. Not that one. That's her story, and she's it is what it is, but get her shit back, boy. Um so as y'all can see on this podcast, we're gonna laugh and have a good time too. You know what I mean? Um, but this is definitely Miss Dawn's story.

SPEAKER_01 35:21

Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_00 35:22

The only way Dawn can tell it. Um and I love it. Thank you so much. My bad step.

SPEAKER_01 35:27

No, no, no, you good. I one last question because I want to hear, I want to hear about this transformation. Um, but just going back, you talked about um just kind of like the the quick conversations and you know, trying to get the 15-minute conversations and kind of just be there um in the best way you could. Um, did you how did you find other uh ways to um just support them while you were still trying to, you know, kind of pull yourself uh up as well?

SPEAKER_02 35:54

Um just helping them to survive because I knew that if I didn't do as much as I could that their humanity would not be intact when they came home. And that was and I was I've done prison ministry for over 20 years. Oh wow so that's it it that it came naturally to just that's beautiful. Yeah, thank you. To just make sure that they you know because that was always because if the enemy can't destroy you one way, he'll destroy you another way. Yes. So I had to walk through that, especially with my youngest son. My my oldest son, um, the one that's was sentenced to 15 years, is um and he's fighting an appeal and he'll be home soon. He has three sons, he's got to come home. Amen. So um let's do it. But with my youngest, I knew he would be destroyed if I just, you know, left him to himself. So I had to be on the wall. Wow. I think does that sound mean what sound who does that sound mean I have to go home now?

unknown 37:03

What the hell are you talking about?

SPEAKER_00 37:04

Oh no, no, no, I heard it too. No, I think somebody touching something gotta be touching over there. Uh so let's talk like miracle, right? So you went from struggle with addiction to becoming a criminal defense lawyer.

SPEAKER_02 37:22

Just look at God.

SPEAKER_00 37:23

Look at him. First of all, I want to say you realizing your potential, maximizing your potential, and releasing your potential to the world. Becoming a defense lawyer. Tell me how did that happen?

SPEAKER_02 37:38

Um I was in school for my undergraduate at Governor State, and one of my professors was actually a criminal defense attorney. So he did a little course on what it takes to be a lawyer.

SPEAKER_03 37:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 37:55

So I went through his course, and while I was there, um my youngest son was being sentenced. He was 17 at the time, and he was getting ready to get a three-year sentence. Excuse me. So I said, um, well, if you can do three years in the penitentiary, then I can do three years in law school. I like that. I did it in two, but okay, Miss Don.

SPEAKER_00 38:21

I like that. I like that.

SPEAKER_02 38:24

So, and then, you know, when your children are going through and you pay these people, yeah, and they don't really do anything, and you figure out how to make things happen, you might as well get paid to do it too.

SPEAKER_00 38:37

I love that for you.

SPEAKER_02 38:38

Because I think about Well, I if they pay, then it's can y'all can you hit them up?

SPEAKER_00 38:43

So I got you. Uh yeah, it's cost, but uh to be um, so I work in violence prevention, right? So I've been doing it without getting paid forever. One of my homies, Big Ron, Wild Hunness stove, my boy, shout out to Big Ron, man, Wild Hunness, man, Ron Mosley. He came to me one day and was like, hey, drill. I'm like, what up, brody? He like, hey man, you want to be a part of violence prevention, bro? I'm like, yeah, what I gotta do. He like, man, just what you do all the time, man. You know what I'm saying? I'm like, all right, bet. So he like, you get paid for it. What? Well, I get paid to do something I've been doing for free my whole life. Where is that? And then it's a passion for me, too. You know what I mean? So damn, that's that's dope for.

SPEAKER_02 39:27

And you know, I just had a vision of being in in law school, and the students were talking about um, you know, different careers and and how much they pay and everything. I was like, oh, that's right, you get paid to do this. But because when you're doing something that comes so naturally and that you know you're called to do, yes, getting paid is gravy. Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 39:51

Like they say, you do something you love, you never have to work a day in your life. Yes, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 39:54

I love that concept.

SPEAKER_01 39:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 39:56

Cause it's like, like this. I love doing this. We love talking, like we're in our real element, you know what I mean? And um this is what this is definitely what this is about. So, how do your clients respond, right? When they find out your story, like when you, if you ever had met a client, right? He's thinking, oh, she just this little auntie. Right. So when they find out, like, I've been through this and that, do they uh reaction to you change?

SPEAKER_02 40:22

Yeah, it does encourage them, especially the ones facing serious situations. It it encourages that.

SPEAKER_00 40:29

Okay, right, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 40:30

So because I tell them, look, I didn't get here by myself, I got here with Jesus, and this is who's going with us, so let's go.

SPEAKER_01 40:35

All right now.

SPEAKER_00 40:36

I like that. See, she mentioned Jesus and God and everything, y'all. So y'all better take notes on the reel. So I like that. I like that. So giving back and moving forward. Um what do you say to give me my no no no no no no? Give my grandma back. Come on. No, no, no, no, no. Giving back like to the community, to the people, and moving forward. Now that you are who you are, Miss Dawn, what do you say to women who are where you once were?

SPEAKER_02 41:07

Don't give up no matter what.

SPEAKER_03 41:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 41:12

Keep praying, keep trusting God, keep reading the word, put your gospel music on and encourage yourself in the Lord. And whatever it was that He created you to be, just be it. Whatever it takes, be it. Because we need you, we need you, we need you.

SPEAKER_00 41:28

And I probably know the answer to this, right? What gives you the strength to keep showing up? Even on days when you going through, you know, the divorce and going through hurt, hardship, pain every day. What what makes you say, I'ma still do what I do and show up?

SPEAKER_02 41:47

God is amazing. He always does something. Like today I wasn't even supposed to be here. But really, y'all, you all said, come on and do this. So this is encouragement. So I'm up past my bedtime and carrying on, and you know, we have so it's just always just just the Lord, not even just, it's the Lord. That's that's for me, that's what it is. Ordering your steps.

SPEAKER_01 42:16

Sure. Yes, yes. Definitely, man. This has been, man, you are, I mean, I like Gerald said, I I never would have just thought. I know we we you know, we've talked before and I knew some of your story, but just kind of hearing it all laid out and just seeing, I mean, I just man, you're you're amazing. Amazing. You amazing. Well, thank you.

SPEAKER_02 42:39

We didn't cry anything. Did we do this right?

SPEAKER_00 42:46

Okay. I mean, we can cry another time. Yeah, it's a lot.

SPEAKER_02 42:58

Well, thank you all for having me. This was the time of my life today. Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 43:03

I'm just saying that just to be saying it.

SPEAKER_02 43:05

Hey, I had a wall. Thank you so much.

SPEAKER_01 43:07

We we really we really enjoyed you, Dawn. Um, just thank you for being who you are. You are just um just a warrior, just a testament, a pillar for the community, a mother, survivor, a truth teller, all the good things. A fighter, an overcomer, achiever. I can keep going on on and on. Um, but I just uh thank you for being vulnerable um and being yourself and authentic and just uh showing the world who you are. Um, I know you've inspired me, you've inspired all of us in the room. And so I know your message definitely touched the hearts of uh so many um who are listening to this. Yes. Um and it really is also just a powerful reminder and your reminder that um really the justice system just needs more angels like you. Um so I just Man, I just can't say enough about how grateful I am for um just the healing that you've done within yourself because it it's kind of hard to sometimes we don't see how that just reverberates out into society and how that just think about all the people that you have impacted just because you decided to change and you decided to heal and you decided to you know become a better person for yourself, for your children, and for your community. And so you're just just an inspiration. I just thank you so much for thank you for coming on and sharing your story.

SPEAKER_00 44:35

Definitely. Um with that being said, y'all, until next time, you feel me, you gotta take this with y'all, right? So we this is what we say we say what you think you become, what you feel you attract, and what you imagine you can create. Thank y'all, and we out this peace.

SPEAKER_01 44:55

Peace out, y'all.