The Photographer Who Deleted Everything

Bryce & Manda from Porterhouse Video discuss a photographer that has ruined her business by deleting everyone's photos, a Bride who makes a crazy list of expectations for her groomsmen and Bryce challenges Manda to Wedding Trivia!

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00:00 - Intro 
01:15 - A Photographer Deletes Her Photos
37:30 - MORE VENDORS PLEASE
37:49 - Worst Groomsmen List EVER
54:54 - Wedding Trivia!

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Transcript

SPEAKER_04 0:00

Hey Lovebirds, welcome to For Better or Worse, a podcast where we talk about everything weddings, vendors, and love. Amanda.

SPEAKER_06 0:06

I'm Bryce, and we're wedding videographers based out of Rochester, New York.

SPEAKER_04 0:10

We're also married to each other.

SPEAKER_06 0:11

Yes. Do you have your ring on today?

SPEAKER_04 0:14

I do. Do you?

unknown 0:15

I don't.

SPEAKER_04 0:17

No, you stay back there. Uh today we have a vendor bender story. We also have a story from get back over here. So today we have a vendor bender story that was actually sent to us uh by Lauren from Gallery Guthrie, who was on here last week. If you haven't had a chance to, go back and watch that episode. It was absolutely incredible having her here.

SPEAKER_06 0:37

And then I have a story from 2015 of a bride who imposed a bunch of rules on her groomsmen so that they wouldn't mess up the day. And then the third thing I have is You said you had something for me.

SPEAKER_04 0:47

What is it?

SPEAKER_06 0:47

It's uh wedding trivia that we're gonna do together. Not together. It's wedding trivia that I cooked up all the questions and you get to guess what the answers are.

SPEAKER_04 0:57

The answer is bride married husband because he hit her with a stick.

SPEAKER_06 1:03

Yeah, but nowadays that's not the only way people get married. Sometimes brides marry brides, sometimes grooms marry grooms. Give me the times.

SPEAKER_04 1:14

Let's do it. Sorry, I'm a little sad right now. You know, patriotic Kenny on TikTok.

SPEAKER_06 1:19

Yes.

SPEAKER_04 1:19

He's the guy that like forever ago he was like he's got that. He does the Oh my goodness, Amanda. Amanda. Yeah, no, he hangs out with like there's like that, uh, there's Amanda, and then oh god, I forgot her other name, but like she's deaf and they so they do sign language all the time and everything. Oh yeah, yeah. But turns out that patriotic Kenny has stage four lung cancer. Oh shit. So today they were actually putting uh I just thought I was watching a TikTok about his merch and stuff like that. And it's it's really, really sweet. One of the stickers that they have actually says, Oh my goodness of madness. So we're gonna have to get it and put it up there because I love Grandad Kenny. That's awesome. Shout out to Grandad Kenny, man. We we absolutely love him. He's just so sweet. When he's that what that first TikTok I saw of him where they got him a uh a scooter, like people had donated, and he found out that they had donated enough money, and he's like, You're kidding.

SPEAKER_07 2:12

You're kidding, no way.

SPEAKER_04 2:14

That man has that man has lived such a full life. Like, he he's gone to so many places and he's just like, Look at the trees. Like, he's just he's having sex.

SPEAKER_06 2:23

I love the video of him in the Waymo, like the the automatic car.

SPEAKER_07 2:28

He starts driving and he's like, Whoa, whoa! It's gonna turn. No way, he doesn't make this turn. It's turning. Amanda, it's going.

SPEAKER_04 2:37

It's awesome. Uh he has no idea who we are at all, but uh he just he's one of those guys where he's just like, Yeah, that's my grandfather. Like patriotic Kenny is my grandfather, and he doesn't know it. Okay. With that fun piece of news, should we start?

SPEAKER_06 2:55

I don't need your approval.

SPEAKER_04 2:56

Oh, but she needs yours. Um so I thought today that we would start off with a vendor bender.

SPEAKER_09 3:02

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 3:03

Usually we wait till the middle, but if I'm being honest, I feel like the last time we did a vendor bender with our girl Lauren, I I just wanted to keep calling you Chuck throughout it. So I feel like if we start with the vendor bender, maybe there'll be a bit that carries throughout this whole episode.

SPEAKER_06 3:21

Maybe.

SPEAKER_04 3:22

We'll see. Okay.

SPEAKER_06 3:23

So I'm obviously not gonna wait a minute, can you move the microphone so that it's in your mouth? Yeah, there you go.

SPEAKER_04 3:29

It's like that one TikTok where the guy's like, yeah, and then it's when his eye like he's talking and then his eyes go dead every time he goes to put the microphone in his mouth. He's like, huh. Um, so I'm obviously not gonna name drop this, and this also isn't local to our area, but it's another uh photography wedding page thing on Facebook, and it says vendor review about uh photography. Damn, I'm not gonna be able to do that again.

SPEAKER_06 3:58

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_04 3:59

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_06 4:02

I'm gonna take that burp sound and layer it over top and every time I say it, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 4:07

Okay, so anytime I mention it, I'll just open my mouth and you'll put a burp in. Yeah, yeah, but hell yeah. Uh okay, so uh you shouldn't have told me you were gonna do that. Hey, don't be the person that forgets to RSVP. Click subscribe.

SPEAKER_06 4:23

Right now.

unknown 4:24

Do it.

SPEAKER_06 4:25

Do it.

SPEAKER_04 4:25

We need a headcount of how many people we have.

SPEAKER_06 4:28

The cater is down our necks.

SPEAKER_04 4:30

She lost all of my wedding photos and took six months to pay me back. Ooh. She deletes bad reviews and took down her Google page because she had so much negative feedback. So I am hoping posting my review on this page will prevent other brides from making the mistake of hiring her. I am devastated. She lost my entire gallery of wedding photos. Not only that, but she did an incredibly poor job the day of my wedding, and her services went from bad to worse. The experience from the day of the wedding through the months that followed was unprofessional, disorganized, and ultimately unacceptable. I had reached out to photography before my wedding to inquire about her taking my wedding photos in October of last year. So this is somewhat recent. I booked her and had to pay her up front, which she messaged me and was very insistent on being paid. The day of the wedding, she met me at the cabin that I was getting ready at in state that I'm from. She briefly introduced herself and had no personality whatsoever. Okay, some of us don't. I mean, I feel like I'm teeming with personality, and there's other people I've met that I'm just like, that's your personality. Yeah. Lack thereof. No hate on that so far.

SPEAKER_06 5:56

A negative personality.

SPEAKER_04 5:57

Anti-personality. She then took my dress and boots down to the venue to take detail photos, yet never came back up to the cabin to take getting ready photos, which I had wanted. My family said they saw her just hanging out down at the venue and that she was just standing around. I was disappointed that I was not getting any getting ready photos and was wondering where she was the entire time. Now, this is something that can kind of be fixed on the day of just, you know, I'm I'm gonna interject small things here and there because this is a very long thing. That's an easy fix in the sense of, hey, your photographer's not doing anything. Well, I want getting ready photos. Looks like they can't happen. That's a speak up moment.

SPEAKER_09 6:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 6:43

They're working for you there. So, like, you know, there have been times where it's like, hey, actually, my grandmother just got here and I know we didn't talk about it, but can you go get some pictures of her getting her makeup done? Like, yeah, click, click, click. Done. That's easy enough. Like, speak up on your wedding day. Like, things happen. Things you may have been like, yeah, I really want pictures of me getting ready, but like, who knows? Maybe something happened and your face is just not given happy bride to be. You can easily say, actually, I don't want getting ready photos. Let's pivot. Why don't you go get some reception vent, you know, area photos?

SPEAKER_06 7:21

But I kind of I can't imagine not being around for any of the getting ready photos at all. At all. Yeah, like I can't imagine, you know, I just weddings are all sorts of bouncing around all over the place. I mean, maybe wherever where they she take she said it said they take the dress and the boots down the hill or something.

SPEAKER_04 7:38

Down to down to so like they were in a uh like a bridal cabin and the venue was you know somewhere below. Got it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She took them there to go get, you know, photos in the space, which is very common.

SPEAKER_06 7:49

I don't feel like I'm ever doing anything on a wedding day for more than like 10 minutes before I go and do something else to capture as much as I can.

SPEAKER_04 7:58

Maybe she doesn't get candid getting ready photos. Maybe, like, you know, at like at some point she was gonna pop back in there and be like, okay, I'm actually just gonna now get a couple shots and clear everybody out so it doesn't look messy. Like I said, I wasn't there, but like I have seen some people that don't take candid getting ready photos because of the chaos of it all. But they're like, okay, are you about to do like her lip touch up and maybe a little bit of like highlighter? Can everybody move out of the way? I'll get those. So it's a little more posy, but I've seen people do that.

SPEAKER_06 8:28

Especially when they start directing vendors and they're like, Can you like move the brush down her cheek a little bit? And you're like, Oh my god, like some people do their job.

SPEAKER_04 8:37

It's some people's style, and you know, like you saw the photos and you liked them. Maybe that's why she was like, Why isn't she taking getting ready photos? You don't always know somebody's process if you didn't do like you know, enough like research pre-work with them about what they're doing.

SPEAKER_06 8:52

And if they didn't set that up either, that's their fault. That's on them as well. If you were gonna set it up like that, then because that that's I don't know. But like I said, that's our wedding day showing.

SPEAKER_04 9:00

It's an easy fix. If you want those photos being done, it's really easy to be like, hey, like the bride's getting her makeup done, like she wants you to come up and take pictures really quick. Like, yeah, it's a little annoying, but that's also why you have like a crew around you to make sure you're getting what you want. And like I said, these people are working for you, they're on your team. Back to the review. Uh then she was okay. Then she was nowhere to be found immediately after the ceremony was over, which was the time I was wanting to take family photos before dinner started. I saw her sitting in her vehicle on her phone, and I had to go look for her and explicitly ask her to take our pictures.

SPEAKER_06 9:41

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_04 9:42

This was extremely frustrating, especially considering we had paid her to guide and manage these moments. I agree. I agree fully. Like, that's like the normal timeline of the day. I mean, even if you have a first look and do a whole bunch of like family photos and stuff like that to kind of get some of them out of the way, like normally after the uh the ceremony, you take some family photos in like the ceremony space with all the cousins and everything that finally showed up. Yeah. But like I would never disappear right after. Like it insane. Sounds like it just sounds like a perfect storm of something must have been happening.

SPEAKER_06 10:21

Something must have been happening and she wasn't covering overthrew it. But like, I feel like there's one of those things where they must have been like, gee, you must have called her beforehand and been like I'm hoping. I don't know. You know. It's not just a sh weddings aren't just like a show up on the day and wing it kind of thing. They're at least like you feel out of form. Are you taking a are you doing a first look? Are you doing photos after the ceremony? Or is there anything I need to whatever?

SPEAKER_04 10:48

Yeah, no, I feel like there's so much there's so much pre-production to a wedding in regards to the people that are capturing it. I mean, like we have like our initial phone call for videography, and we're like, hey, who are you?

SPEAKER_05 11:00

Before we even sign a contract. Right.

SPEAKER_04 11:03

Uh and like there's no reason to not at least like a few weeks, a month before the wedding, to just have a follow-up because so much changes from like booking to right beforehand. You know? I don't know. She then left early. Her allotted time that I hired her for was from 2 p.m. to 8 p.m. That's not a lot of time. No. She left at 7 p.m. right after we signed the papers because she quote had all she needed. She missed the fun reception photos and many of the candid moments we were looking forward to having captured. I mean, you don't really know what she got and what she didn't, because you didn't get your photos back. So she could have gotten something. We'll never know.

SPEAKER_06 11:50

She got everything. She did. She swears.

SPEAKER_04 11:54

Two days after the wedding, she sent five sneak peek photos uh to me over Facebook in a Pixie set link. I've never heard of that. Uh really?

SPEAKER_06 12:04

Anna uses Pixie Set. Like half of the photographers we know use Picky's Pixie Set.

SPEAKER_04 12:09

Is that what it's called? Yeah. I feel like anytime like I just click on it, I don't like I'm like, oh, photos. Like I don't look what I'm just excited to see what it is. I didn't realize that that's a thing. These five photos are the only photos I have from my wedding day. Not only that, but none of these five photos are of our family, friends, the venue are standing at the altar, the photos that I would have cherished the most. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 12:32

Oh my God.

SPEAKER_04 12:33

The link is no longer active and it says this page cannot be found. I now have no photos of the most important day of my life, and have none with mine or my husband's grandparents, friends, family, all that traveled to be there, or all of the work that was put into that day. That breaks my heart. The second you get your photos, videos, anything, download them. Yeah, 100%. Save them to anything and everything you can, even if you just upload them to Facebook or Instagram or literally anything, save them because who knows what could happen. The apocalypse could happen and they could all be gone. Servers could crash, anything could happen to this weird digital world that our our images live in. Yeah. Save them, print them out at a Walgreens.

SPEAKER_06 13:29

A lot of like a lot of vendors unfortunately don't have redundancy when it comes to like their files. And I always find that so strange. Like the guy I used to work with in Connecticut, he told me that when he would send me wedding films to edit for him, he would delete them off of his computer after. And so my files were the only files that existed from a wedding. That's insane. Yeah, and at that point I just had a janky MacBook. So it was like I do remember that. And and you know, and like a little thing that we would plug in, like a hard drive, right? A lot of people don't save their photos and videos forever.

SPEAKER_04 14:10

And so, like mine the second I got them. I remember we were in Disney World.

SPEAKER_06 14:14

We put them in a Google Drive and we put them in Dropbox.

SPEAKER_04 14:18

And I also it it I also just like saved a bunch to my phone. I went through and just saved them to my phone, saved and sent them to people. Yeah, and I think I put some on Facebook and uploaded them because I was just like, these will live in infamy. Yeah, you know, and we we have a bunch printed out, like there's a bunch printed out as well. So like the second you get your photos, don't let them live in the weird world that they were sent to you in. Yeah, this is bring them into your world, buy a flash drive, you know, go immediately to Walgreens, plug in your phone, tick tick boom.

SPEAKER_06 14:48

Yeah, the this this is twofold too. If you're a couple and you're receiving your media back from your vendor, save it like immediately. And if you're a vendor and you work with digital media, get redundancies, get a second hard drive that you copy everything over that they live in. Yes, and and store it at their home. Get a third one if you can. Like we have a third one that we upload every three months and we keep at my parents' house. What's his name? That one is Scrooge. That is Scrooge. Because Scrooge lives by himself and he keeps everything. Yeah, so he's he's our one digital vault that we keep at another house just in case this one burns down and we lose everything.

SPEAKER_04 15:30

Yep, and then the other one is Bing Bong.

SPEAKER_06 15:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 15:32

Because Bing Bong keeps all the memories. And then the other one is Boss Baby because we let our son name it. Yeah. Our son named it Boss Baby because it was for work. So I mean, it's I I've totally forgot that's why we named it Scrooge because we give it all of our stuff and it holds on to it. Oh my god, that was funny. I am beyond disappointed and sad because our family and friends did not take photos and were instead enjoying the moment like we asked them so to, rightfully so, considering the fact that we hired a professional to take our photos. After the wedding in November, I inquired about a time frame of getting our photos back, and she responded uh with a message saying it will be 8 to 12 weeks. The 8 to 12 week time frame came and went, and I still had not heard from her. The photos should have arrived in mid-January if she had taken the full 12 weeks. I remained patient and texted her again on messages, Facebook and Instagram inquiring about these photos. And in mid-February, I still received no response. I was starting to get concerned, and the worst case scenario was starting to become more and more true. I then received an email uh from her in late February stating that she had lost all of the wedding photos and has deleted them from her SD card, so they are impossible to recover and are gone forever.

SPEAKER_06 16:55

What the fuck?

SPEAKER_05 16:57

What the fuck?

SPEAKER_04 16:58

You and I sometimes will go to a wedding and be like, oh, I never formatted this card. Well, it looks like all the stuff from this is on here and it's gonna stay on here because we're not touching it because I don't remember if this is I know we did because we clip selected for it.

SPEAKER_06 17:13

It's on the computer, it's on yeah, it's on one hard drive or two or possibly four.

SPEAKER_04 17:18

But I am not deleting it from the camera anything now.

SPEAKER_06 17:22

Like you never delete it from the camera until you format the camera.

SPEAKER_04 17:26

And until we've both gone like it's like the nuclear bomb. Like, I turn it on, and then you from like a mile away also turn it on.

SPEAKER_06 17:34

And then we're like, I check every single drive. Should we do this? I check every single drive and be like, okay, camera one, you know, camera one, this you number 65 is there. Camera two, number sixty five is there. Like, okay, I got them all. Like, let's I can delete it from one. And then I'm like, eh, maybe I'll keep it for another month just to make sure.

SPEAKER_04 17:55

Always do that because I'm so scared of something happening. I emailed her back that day stating my concern and how something like this, how something like this could happen, and heard no response from her for another two days. She blatantly was ignoring my emails and messages uh and texts as well as on social media. She has continued to post on her social media pages and even emailed my friend back during the time that she was ignoring my painful and confusing email that just wanted some clarity. Ew, ew. That's rough.

SPEAKER_06 18:27

Oh my god, yeah. That's rough. At least when we when we had troubles with like people silence. We went ghost mode.

SPEAKER_04 18:35

Because we were trying to fix a whole bunch of things and like we didn't have answers as to what was happening. Yeah, so and we were like, let's get all of our ducks in a row before we say anything, which was 100% post anything or reply to any like other inquiries. Which was like totally the wrong move, but we were also like we don't want to that one. Well, yeah, but we also didn't want to be like we don't totally know what's going on because for me that makes me more nervous. I would rather be like, I would rather be like, maybe their silences they're working really hard, which was the case. Which was the case, which was the case, and we were getting everything done, we just didn't have like definitive answers, and we were like scared.

SPEAKER_09 19:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 19:12

Because we've never been in that situation, and like moving forward, we've now been like, these are our communication standards and guidelines, and we hold each other to it, and it's been so much easier.

SPEAKER_06 19:22

Sending an email is not scary, even if it's like a bad news email, even if it's there's ways of doing it. I have no idea when I'm going to get this done, is way better than just not saying anything.

SPEAKER_04 19:34

I have it, it's safe. It's not that I'm not working on it, it's I'm backlogged. Yes. And I'm making sure that I don't just throw something at you and you go, I waited a long time and it still wasn't up to what I wanted it to be. It's I like I we've always said, I would rather give it to you late and have you be mad at us for it being like later than you and you know, we initially intended than you getting it on time and being disappointed with what you waited for. Absolutely. Um, which now we don't have that issue anymore because you know, we have fixed all of our issues and everything like that. But it's it's one of those things where it's like looking back on it, things could have been handled so much better. And then seeing stuff like this, I'm like, oh man. Still posting on your Facebook and responding to other people knowing full well that you've lost somebody's entire day.

SPEAKER_06 20:26

Gross.

SPEAKER_04 20:27

Uh what the hell? This is gonna be a burp and full episode. Fun fact this isn't coffee, it's diagonal.

SPEAKER_06 20:35

It's never been coffee, it's always been diacro.

SPEAKER_04 20:38

Oh, yeah. My black coffee that's fizzing. Yeah. Why does Manda burp all the time? Because she's got a caffeine problem. Uh, okay, are you ready?

SPEAKER_06 20:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 20:49

She then blocked me on all social media. Ew. Which did not improve my confidence on feeling like I had gotten scammed and that she was not going to deliver the photos or pay me back. Holy shit. After the two-day period, she only responded when I had sent her an email stating that because she had ignored me for 48 hours, and if this continues, I will have no other options than to take her to small claims court to ensure I get a refund. Yes. She then responded hours later with a very dry and insensitive email. Also, her doing a dry and insensitive email. You said she had no personality on the day. Why are you expecting her to be bright and shiny over email?

SPEAKER_09 21:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 21:25

Um uh that answered none of my questions. She insisted on uh paying me back with a four-installment plan, which is extremely unfair because when I was paying her, I had to pay the amount in full and up front. Yeah, f you. Yeah. Stupid. Like I said, I don't understand how paying things back works. But I mean, like, we've we've been in situations where we've been like, oops, accidentally sent my money to this place. Can you send it back? And they're like, actually, it has to go around the continent three times by carrier pigeon for you to get the money back. So I don't understand how money in The universe works.

SPEAKER_06 22:02

It's a Clarna payment. It's like this isn't you can't Klarna your refund, you asshole.

SPEAKER_04 22:08

Like that's so stupid. No, you're not wrong. But like I said, I still don't understand how it works. Like, hey, bank, I need the money back. I need to tell my bride when it comes back. And they're like, it's being taken around the universe by Columbus on his boat.

SPEAKER_07 22:21

Then you can have it back in coin. We sent our fastest boy to run from Boston all the way to Indiana. You're tearing.

SPEAKER_03 22:31

I don't know how it works, so I can't comment on it. I don't know how.

SPEAKER_06 22:36

He's very fast and very good with money.

SPEAKER_04 22:40

It's just like this jangly sack of coins on this little like old-timey newspaper boy, and he's like looking around the desert for water. Oh my god. Which is funny because this comes from. Sorry, this is it's actually funny because this actually comes from a like a desert state. So it's funny. Losing my gallery was bad enough, but lying about it, I don't think she lied about it. Um, and blaming it on me just added another layer to the intense frustration and sadness. As a bride, I was eagerly and regularly checking my email for messages from her containing my wedding photos. She then blamed losing the gallery on Pixie Set, uh, an online photography platform. Yet after speaking with other professionals in this field, this is simply not true because Pixieset has not is nothing but a reliable platform, and all of the photos being gone is simply user error.

SPEAKER_09 23:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 23:33

I then asked how there are not any photos on the SD card, and she said this that she deletes them regularly, like we said.

SPEAKER_06 23:41

Yeah, she formatted it.

SPEAKER_04 23:42

Um I am shocked. It took me reaching out to her, that's all in caps, uh, to discover that all of my wedding photos were gone. I have very high certainty that if I had not reached out or threatened to take legal action, that she would have kept the money. I did not get my wedding photos, and it would have been a complete scam. At no point were we proactively informed of any issue. We had to discover this ourselves after months of silence. Even then, communication was delayed, incomplete, and avoided directly uh and she avoided directly answering key questions. In last hope attempt of getting our money back, I agreed to do a payment plan. It then took her three separate attempts to send me a contract that she signed that was in a format that I could do an e-signature. She was extremely infuriating and difficult to work with from start to finish. It took until uh February, end of February, 122 days later, to receive the first installment of getting paid back. It took another 160 days or six months to receive a full refund.

SPEAKER_08 24:45

Jesus correct.

SPEAKER_04 24:46

It is now the beginning of April, and I have finally been paid back. However, it does not replace my once-in-a-lifetime wedding photos. I still feel a great loss for. No bride should ever have to go through what I went through. Her carelessness and indifference is extremely alarming. She should not be working in the wedding industry, and no bride should ever trust her with something so special. I have a feeling this is not her first time doing this, so I cannot encourage you enough to find a different wedding photographer. She does not care about these photos or the emotional weight they can hold. The only advice I can give is to hire someone you know personally or have met them personally or seen their work. I am not a person to write bad reviews, but I do not want anyone else going through what I went through while dealing with such a deceitful and careless person. This was not just a mistake. It was a complete failure to deliver the most basic service we paid for, combined with lack of accountability, communication, and professionalism throughout the entire process. I would never recommend her to anyone. No couple should have to go through this. Losing wedding photos is devastating enough, but the way the situation was handled made it significantly worse. This was the kind of situation you think would never happen to you until it does. Spread the word. Edit. After reviewing other posts on wedding pages, there have been so many other couples that have been screwed over by her. She deletes her bad yet honest reviews of her scams so that she appears to only have good reviews. It appears that she has done far more bad work than good. Do not fall for her scams. She will screw you. It's in all caps. I don't know how else to read that. Um, it's like when it's in italics, I'm like, hello, good sir. It brings in an accent. Uh, why would you want to trust someone with something so important? Uh please learn from uh mine and so many others' mistakes. Take your money and run to a different photographer. She needs to go out of business. Feeling sad.

SPEAKER_06 26:39

Um get out of my industry. Like if you're if that's your game, if you don't like weddings, I understand getting into weddings, getting a bunch of weddings. Because it's consistent work, there will always be marriages, exactly, and then not liking it anymore and trying to get out of it. But don't give up.

SPEAKER_04 27:00

Finish what you started and then be done. If you don't you don't have to continue doing it for the rest of your life, that's totally fine.

SPEAKER_06 27:06

Finish what you started and then get the f out of my industry because like you're here. That's so stupid. You could God, we we've we've had made so many mistakes in the six years, almost seven years that we've been doing this. But we've also been never like that.

SPEAKER_04 27:23

No, we've also been met with things that we didn't realize would happen.

SPEAKER_06 27:28

I mean a lot of twisties and turnies.

SPEAKER_04 27:30

Don't get me wrong, like a lot of people who are in the wedding industry, vendors and stuff like that, are loan businesses. They're mom and pop businesses, they're you know, like it's themselves. It's it's them in their house or in a small studio, them alone. They're not like this, it's not like going to Wendy's. Right. You know what I mean? Like we're not like these big corporations, it's just us. So if something happens to us, there's no one else to really fall back on.

SPEAKER_06 27:57

Right.

SPEAKER_04 27:57

You know, like if I get into a car accident and I had a deadline that day, I'm not making that deadline. I'm in the hospital. If one of my kids has something happen to them, my kid takes precedent.

SPEAKER_09 28:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 28:08

That's when we learned that communication is just the ultimate thing that can make situations better.

SPEAKER_06 28:17

And it doesn't even have to be public, it can be private. Yes. We when whenever I I have a rule, and if you are caught catching yourself in a scam in any industry, in any sort of like you know, part of your life or whatever, that you're caught in a scandal or something where you're starting to get attention, do not respond to it publicly. I'm telling you, do not respond to it publicly because that is the worst thing you can do.

SPEAKER_04 28:44

That's like drawing flies to garbage.

SPEAKER_06 28:46

Exactly. Do you know what I mean? People eat that stuff up. Look what we're doing right now, and they pick every single part of it apart.

SPEAKER_04 28:54

Look what we're doing, we're literally doing that right now.

SPEAKER_06 28:56

Well, we're not we're we're yeah, we're we're doing what's available, but not her response or anything. Does she have a response? No, of course she doesn't.

SPEAKER_04 29:04

I'm gonna go to her thing after this and see if anything's been said because what I like to do We should reach out to this bride and talk to her.

SPEAKER_06 29:10

I'd love to.

SPEAKER_04 29:11

Honestly, I would love to. No, so usually what I do is I don't like to look like if I'm reading a review from a bride, um, or like any anybody who's like giving like any kind of review, I don't immediately go, well, what does the other person have to say about this? I usually will stay on one side and gather all of that information with like a biased sense, and then I jump to the other side, read that with a bias sense and then join them together. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 29:37

It's a cross-examination, right?

SPEAKER_04 29:38

Because if you if you the defense get or the the plaintiff goes, then the defense, then we cross-examine.

SPEAKER_06 29:44

Like that's what I always do. A lot of people don't change their opinion based on new like information. I usually usually a lot of people will hold their like this is the first thing I heard, which means that that's the truth. Doesn't matter if things change. We all read to kill a mockingbird. It doesn't matter if the truth comes out. It's whatever people hear first.

SPEAKER_04 30:09

Um a lot of people have a hard time changing their opinion when they feel like they already like established one.

SPEAKER_06 30:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 30:16

Because like they it also makes them feel like they were wrong, and a lot of people don't like to feel like they were wrong about things. Do you know what I mean? So, like their initial opinion, nope, I'm dying on that hill. But like I said, I like to go through and read just one full side, and then I go read the second full side, and then I compare and contrast like what seems to be the truth.

SPEAKER_09 30:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 30:37

So somebody in the comments said every bride needs to do deep, deep research about their wedding photographer. There's no excuse for any of this. I'm a wedding photographer and back up everything. It stays on my SD cards. It also then goes to my USB drive and then my Lightroom Cloud. It's backed up three times.

SPEAKER_09 30:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 30:56

Uh, all wedding photographers need to use dual slot cameras, two SD cards, two cameras, two lenses. Too many amateurs who can't even focus in pictures try to do weddings.

SPEAKER_06 31:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 31:08

Uh it's insane to me because it's the brides that get screwed.

SPEAKER_06 31:11

Because you can just pick up a camera and say, I'm a wedding person now, and and you find out that it's way harder and way there's way too much weight on the stuff that you're capturing. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_04 31:22

Somebody said drop her, uh, drop her socials, and in her description of who she is, it says follower of Christ, mother, and photographer. Seems like since photographer was last, it seemed like she was like, and I can also take photos. Yes.

SPEAKER_05 31:40

Hellfire! Bring me her social medias. That's funny. I must ban her to hell.

SPEAKER_04 31:48

Uh, sorry. Everybody on here is like any photographer that deletes SD cards before delivery of the gallery is not a professional.

SPEAKER_06 31:56

Yes. Well, it's not the SD cards. If you're doing a lot of weddings, you should format your cards before each wedding.

SPEAKER_04 32:02

But without making sure everything was properly backed up, is what they're saying.

SPEAKER_06 32:05

Like you can't delete it from your SD card. We go home and immediately transfer everything off, and then it's within 24 hours, and then it goes into the network, everything's in the cloud, everything's in whatever. So Jesus Christ.

SPEAKER_04 32:17

See, it's funny. Somebody's like, uh, I get a lot of crap from other photographers uh about not requiring a hundred percent payment up front. I always do it in three parts 33 upon contract, 33 day of, 33 upon delivery. We do ours 30% the day of booking to secure your date, and then we do 70% a week before your wedding.

SPEAKER_09 32:38

Yep.

SPEAKER_04 32:38

We also like our thing is like, yeah, if you book us, you we are contractually obligated to come and shoot your wedding. But if you do not finish paying us, we will not start editing your stuff until that payment is made. Yeah, we're gonna be able to do that. The editing and the delivery does not show up until your end of the contract is completed. Exactly.

SPEAKER_06 32:59

Exactly. And that's only happened once, and it was a very specific reason for it happening. It was a family member that like had to pay. So it was just, you know, getting in charge of like, how how do I get this family member to pay you kind of thing? Um, other than that, though, I mean it's the easiest way to do it. Don't, you know, don't show up to a wedding day until you know how you're getting paid and when. That's the only advice I can give.

SPEAKER_04 33:22

Yeah, like everybody in the comments is like, I'm a photographer, or like I did photography, and like one of the first things you do is not just format your SD card. Why? Photography. What do you do?

SPEAKER_06 33:35

You make that mistake exactly once. And luckily, I made that mistake in college when when I was the DIT and editor for a short film when I went to film school. And I didn't offload one of the cameras when we broke for lunch, and camera crew formatted it, so we lost the entirety of one day. Um, like w everything before lunch, and so I had to make do with what we had when I was editing it. It was really, really bad. And you make that mistake once and then you never do it again. What's going on?

SPEAKER_04 34:11

On this page um that I found, um, it's actually was created by the bride who uh did that big post that I just read, who made that big post. Um, it's called Photography Scam Review Page. There are 175 members on it. Now mind you, I could join it right now just to get the T.

SPEAKER_06 34:34

That's just people who want to wallow in the mud. They're not people that are actually affected by this.

SPEAKER_04 34:39

So somebody posted on this page five days ago. Hey y'all, woman and woman here. We are associate photographers for uh photography, and we are trying to help make things right for the brides and couples that either haven't gotten their galleries or feel they didn't or or did not get all of their photos. We are at a point of getting the raw images from the photographer and uh currently and are needing the information from you, the brides and couples, of when your wedding was and your spouse's names.

SPEAKER_06 35:11

That's a scam.

SPEAKER_04 35:12

We are wanting to make sure all of you receive your photos, raws, or partial edits of the super big important moments. We are willing to discuss full gallery edits depending on potential payment plans or a reshoot if needed. Again, we are so sorry. Uh so many of you are going through this, and the two of us just the two of us just want to make things as right as we can. If you don't want to post directly, you can message one or both of us and we will get everything figured out. Disclosure, just for clarification, we do not work with this photographer. We have just assisted with weddings for her in the past and are trying to get the photo galleries sent to the brides and uh sending a list to this photographer.

SPEAKER_06 35:54

You'll have to do a follow-up on this next week. I'm I'm I'm going to now like when I Yeah, you have to you have to you have to give me an update on everything that's going on because it's coming in right now and it's like this is this is kind of this is this is gonna be one of those things where I think we're gonna have to do like a whole timeline of this because it is it's insane and it's a lot bigger than just like a post of something. Yeah, associates like if they're associates with them, what's what's stopping them from being like, you know, let me get a list of all the brides that are harassing you, our photographer friend, you know. I I believe they have the best intentions are and they're trying to get the raw photos from the photographers so that they can get it.

SPEAKER_04 36:38

It also makes them look really, really good exactly in the sense of like they were like the heroes of the day.

SPEAKER_06 36:42

And also some people like looking, some people like acting too. They just like it.

SPEAKER_04 36:47

You know what I mean? Like, I feel like if they're posting that publicly on that page, like they're like trying to control the heat.

SPEAKER_06 36:54

Well, if there's 170 members, then they're like 175. Yeah, like who's who's who's who? The photographer doesn't even know. The photographer's like, I don't know any of these people. I was in my car during their wedding. I didn't I didn't get a look on their face.

SPEAKER_03 37:06

Your stuff. Whoa, whoa.

SPEAKER_06 37:10

That was a great one. If you have local wedding drama that you want to send us in, not even local.

SPEAKER_04 37:16

If you've seen anything anywhere from any point in time, why are you yelling at me? Because I just want to hear about it. You did one last week from like 2013.

SPEAKER_06 37:27

I've got one from 2015 today, if that helps you, if that helps out at all. Hey, if you're a wedding vendor and you want us to shout you out on the podcast, feel free to reach out. We've made a little list to say, like, hey, this is who we're shouting out this week. Feel free to email us at for better or worsepod at gmail.com or DM us on Instagram and TikTok, and we'll add you to that list to shout out on the podcast. The not used to have a forum that was like the hub for weddings 10 years ago.

SPEAKER_04 37:57

That was like the forum. Like, where else were you gonna talk about weddings really? Like, where were you gonna meet up with other brides? There weren't Facebook pages like brides of whatever.

SPEAKER_06 38:05

Specifically, you know, this is at the end of forum era, and I've gone through meticulously found as many of the best stories as I can from the not forum. Um, last week when we had Lauren here, we read about David's bridal. How they had their own photographers, yeah, which is crazy. So if you haven't seen that, go back and check that out. But um good old Chuck. This one, um, this was a longer post that I'm going to I rewrote just a little bit of it just to like I took what they were saying and made it made make sense because what they were saying didn't really make sense.

SPEAKER_04 38:46

So it's all just emojis and wingdings that I had to translate.

SPEAKER_06 38:50

I've also given it a title, uh, read it, a Reddit style title title. So okay, let's see. Here we go. So title Am I the Asshole for Blowing Up at my groomsman and giving him a list of expectations?

SPEAKER_04 39:02

One groomsman. One groom's man.

SPEAKER_06 39:06

One groom's man.

SPEAKER_04 39:07

Not necessarily. I mean, just from that title alone, I'm gonna say no.

SPEAKER_06 39:13

Probably not, yeah. All right, next segment. I know it off. I know a bunch of dudes, and some of them suck. So it's probably hit or miss. Like, were you blowing up on them and it probably deserved it? Yeah, probably.

SPEAKER_04 39:24

Like I said about having kids at weddings forever ago. If you know the kid is terrible all the time, what makes you think they're gonna be different on the wedding day? And same goes for anybody else you bring to your wedding.

SPEAKER_06 39:36

This was from 2015. So the other night I blew up at one of our groomsmen because he was making the hundredth joke about doing something to my fiance before the wedding. My wife. This time he was joking about shaving my fiance's head the night before the wedding. Now the groomsman is upset with me because I treated him like a child, which he was acting like, and is threatening to be or is threatening to leave the wedding. Okay, bye. This is my fiance's best friend, although my fiance is pretty upset by his actions as well. So as of right now, we are thinking about not having him in the wedding. Is this from the groom's perspective? This is from the bride. This is the bride, the bride's the bride is the one that yelled at him. Yes.

SPEAKER_04 40:17

Okay, so sorry, I my brain, because you were saying like one of my groomsmen, I thought this was a groomsman saying he was gonna shave the bride's head. No, so it's a bride talking about a groomsman in their wedding party.

SPEAKER_06 40:33

Yeah, that's part of the body.

SPEAKER_04 40:35

Saying that he was going to shave the groom's head.

SPEAKER_06 40:38

Yes.

unknown 40:38

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 40:39

Woo! I thought we were gonna have like a Jan Marsha Brady moment where like he's just like cutting her hair.

SPEAKER_06 40:44

I don't want to make a knee-jerk reaction out of anger because they have been friends for over ten years. So I was thinking about having my fiance sit down and talk to him about our expectations. Before I do that, does anyone think these expectations are too extreme? All right, let's see. One, make sure everyone is having a good time, not just you, everyone, which means if you see a need, fill it. If you see someone needs help, help. If someone doesn't have a drink in the wedding party, get them one. Make sure everyone is happy and enjoying themselves, and if there is something you can do to make them have more fun, do it. This is not about you having a good time. This is about what you can do to make sure this is a memorable time for the wedding party and especially the bride and groom.

SPEAKER_04 41:26

This is too ambiguous for me.

SPEAKER_06 41:27

If they are having a good time, you will be having a good time. I don't like this. Yeah, so far, so far, like, okay, you want me to like be a waiter. Because I'm not a caterer.

SPEAKER_04 41:37

Like, that's my first thought in the beginning. Like, there's a huge difference between being like for me, a reasonable expectation is you show up on time with all the things you need, you don't get shit faced, you're there for photos, you stay.

SPEAKER_06 41:51

Hold on. Before you jump ahead of me, there's nine of these. So just this is a this is a a list. But you're right. The only expectation I have for Gruisman is like show up on time and don't be asked.

SPEAKER_04 42:03

Show up on time with your stuff.

SPEAKER_06 42:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 42:06

Don't be a jerk. Be nice. Tell the bride she looks gorgeous. Don't hit on anybody that doesn't want to be hit on, and just generally be there for what you're supposed to be there for. But that's it.

SPEAKER_06 42:18

Two, do not make life more stressful for the bride and the groom. Be as helpful as possible. Do things when asked. Get things done right away. If you think it might stress the bride or groom out, don't do it. Okay. Use common sense. At this point, everything stresses the bride out, which stresses the groom out as well.

SPEAKER_04 42:35

Okay. Don't do anything to stress me out, but everything stresses me out, so you're gonna lose anyway.

SPEAKER_06 42:41

Three, buy a present. You can go in, you can go in with people, but you are expecting to buy a nice present. Check out our wedding, it's registry. Nope. Four. Rule uh four, bachelor party. Talk to the groom about what he wants to do, but make the arrangements. So if he wants a party bus, you research the investigate limo company. That's fine. Get a list from the groom who he who he wants to invite, send out invitations and confirm who is coming and how much the cost. Come up with a game plan.

SPEAKER_04 43:13

That's fine. That's fine. If that's if that's what you're planning on doing, if you are doing a bachelor party, it's not the groom's job to do that. I mean, like, yeah, obviously, like, yeah, I'd like to do something local. Maybe we could like go catch like a game or maybe go bar hopping, but then like that's where it ends. Yeah, everybody else kind of fills in the gaps.

SPEAKER_06 43:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 43:30

Sure, that's fine, I guess, if you're doing that.

SPEAKER_06 43:32

Five, if you're asked to give a speech, you are to do it in under five minutes. Okay, that's fine. It should be about the bride and groom and how happy you are for them. It should not be a roast. You need to remember your audience is people who do not know you and may not know the bride and groom. So choose jokes wisely. What? Exactly.

SPEAKER_04 43:50

Your audience is people that it should be about the bride and groom, but it's uh it may be for people that don't know the bride and groom who are we performing for? Exactly, yeah. That doesn't make any sense.

SPEAKER_06 43:58

Everybody's here from the wedding. I love how she's trying to I think you just really don't like him. She's trying to write this as like an authority point to like everybody. Everybody should give this to their their bride their groomsmen so that they can behave on the day.

SPEAKER_04 44:12

And they're this should be about the bride and groom. But don't say things about the bride and groom because people might not know the bride and groom. Insert like math above my head.

SPEAKER_06 44:25

Do the math here. Since nobody knows them, this is Stacy. This is Carl.

SPEAKER_04 44:31

For those who haven't met anybody yet, why are you here?

SPEAKER_06 44:35

If you don't know anybody, stand up. Security.

SPEAKER_01 44:40

Um I'm so mad right now.

SPEAKER_06 44:44

Six. Do not get overly intoxicated. Fine. Do not drink the night before the wedding. Do not get the groom drunk. Do not get the groom drunk the night before the wedding. That's okay. These are that's a pretty decent rule, I would say. That's okay. Don't get that face. No drinking. Don't get like during a wedding. But don't get face to self.

SPEAKER_04 45:01

You're doing a job. Yeah. You're part of the team. We need you to be part of the team. That's fine.

SPEAKER_06 45:06

I always try to ask grooms like, do not drink before the kiss.

SPEAKER_07 45:12

After the kiss, you can drink. Or a shot.

SPEAKER_04 45:15

Yes. That's fine. Fine. Totally fine. A toast with your boys, you all crack a beer open beforehand. That's totally fine. Because the girls are going to be able to do it. You guys are playing cards or something and you're gonna drink a little memo. Like, that's that's totally fine. Because, like, like I said, the girls are getting ready. We might pop open a champagne, we might have a seltzer, the girls even themselves might pop open a cold one. That's fine. But if you do more than that, you're setting yourself up to not be yourself at the things you need to be yourself for.

SPEAKER_06 45:45

Exactly. And you're gonna hear about it for the rest of your life.

SPEAKER_04 45:49

The whole day is a party, and you want to be able to go to the entire party and not be just down and out before anything even starts.

SPEAKER_06 45:56

Seven. That's fine. Smile and pictures and do what you're told by the photographer. Beautiful. Great rule. Love it.

SPEAKER_04 46:02

Beautiful. We're happy to be there. We're having a that's what I say to all the groomsmen. There's nothing in our front pockets. It is top button only. We are not wearing sunglasses during photos right now. Please listen to the photographer. Check your flies regularly. And we are happy to be here because we love the couple. Like that is my spiel. Also, please pull on the yellow safety tab. Keep your hands and arms inside the vehicle. Para sus cuidados. I go through the whole thing.

SPEAKER_06 46:32

Do what you're told without question on the day of the wedding. All right. I know, jeez. Be early to everything. If you're if you're on time, you're late. Just make it make sure you're not late. Let me know if you think this is too extreme. Um, yes, I do. I think a lot of this is too extreme.

SPEAKER_04 46:50

So much the part the problem is that there's so many valid things in there that the few things that are just so out of whack make the things that look valid just like part of the list of both.

SPEAKER_06 46:59

Yeah, she's doing the South Park thing where like you they always make jokes that are way too crass so that the FCC will cut them, those jokes, and it leaves beyond the case.

SPEAKER_04 47:13

No, because I mean, like I said, I agree with I'll say about 80% of this list.

SPEAKER_06 47:18

I'll say a half of it. 80% is the message of it is there.

SPEAKER_04 47:25

Like speeches shouldn't be super long. If they don't want to be roasted, that's fine because clearly this groomsman has like a very crass sense of humor. So maybe being like, we're not roasting, we're just talking about the couple and love and whatever, keep it central around that. That's fine.

SPEAKER_09 47:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 47:42

Um, show up early to things, like you know, because there's a lot of timeline changes on wedding days. It's easier to just have everybody there early in case something happens, or we need help, be helpful, don't get drunk, be present for things, be happy for things, make sure that you're taking care of the groom because you know he's your team captain, support him. Like the ambiance, the the the spirit of the rules is right. Yeah, however, this comes across very much as like, and you will all have the same haircut. And if your socks are askew, fire upon you!

SPEAKER_06 48:19

Listen, if you know if you know this guy, you know for 10 years that he's never taken anything seriously. Why now? Why this yeah, why is he gonna take this? He's not going to, and he's he's going to do something. So you either have to, yeah, like if you if you have to make these rules for your groomsmen, maybe he probably shouldn't be in the groomsman party.

SPEAKER_04 48:41

Like the rules themselves are like okay.

SPEAKER_06 48:44

Like not the you don't have to get the you know, get us a good gift, and that's rule number three. Like, what was that rule number three or rule number two? Let me see.

SPEAKER_04 48:55

I think it was three.

SPEAKER_06 48:56

It was rule number three. Is it and you have to get us a gift? Yeah, no. Um like no I'm already here and I'm already helping you.

SPEAKER_04 49:04

Once again, we don't totally know what the circumstances of the wedding are. We don't know if it was a destination wedding, we don't know how much the couple themselves paid for for the people to be a part of the day. Maybe that's why she's like, You get us a gift, you plan us a bachelor party and whatever, because we're doing all of this to get you to our wedding. I don't, I don't know. I also don't know their history. She shouldn't I don't disagree.

SPEAKER_06 49:25

But I don't know if respect a gift.

SPEAKER_04 49:26

I don't know why that was on her list. Yeah. Do you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_06 49:29

Like, what are you like, what are you a child, like, grandma's here, where's my gift? You know, like, you know, that's that's that's brat behavior. And uh, we don't want brat brat brides because holy so bad.

SPEAKER_04 49:41

Like I said, 80% of it, I can get behind the spirit of it.

SPEAKER_06 49:46

Yeah, but if you're making this specifically for one groomsman, then maybe he shouldn't be part of the wedding.

SPEAKER_04 49:51

Maybe the whole reason, like, she's like, get us a gift and only talk about the maybe because like he's really like, this is about my boy, and she's like, no, no, this is about our marriage, our love, our wedding day. Maybe that's like to drive home the point, like, this is about us. It's a party for us. You go to somebody's birthday, it's not your party, it's their party. Maybe she's trying to drive it home. I don't know. I'm trying really, really hard to be like, I know wedding planning is stressful. I know there's always like one person at the wedding who makes you just want to claw your eyes out. I'm trying really hard to give her the benefit of the doubt. Bridal benefit.

SPEAKER_06 50:29

Yeah, you're probably really stressed, and that's definitely helping or not helping you make the show.

SPEAKER_04 50:33

She said, like, everything don't stress the bride out because everything's stressing the bride out. It's like, girl, do you need a memo?

SPEAKER_06 50:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 50:41

Oh, just like one little memo.

SPEAKER_06 50:43

God.

SPEAKER_04 50:44

Are there any like comments on it?

SPEAKER_06 50:46

Yeah, there's a there's a bunch of comments on it. Um the very first one, I think, is the best comment. It says it's at first, it has a bunch of ha ha ha ha ha in the beginning, and it says, This is gold. Damn straight it's too extreme. Yeah. Here's a more reasonable list. One, show up on time in the clothes we asked. Two, don't be an ass. You really want to ask him to get um ask him to get grown people a drink. He should be responsible for other people's happiness. And if you get nothing else off of your list, you do not get to dictate that someone buys you a knife's present. And yeah, that's like that, yeah. That sounds like everybody else just quotes it so they can save it, but yeah, no, that's that's a good, that's the best comment.

SPEAKER_04 51:28

Yeah, like like I said, the spirit of it of like you're here to be on our team. We're not, you know, this isn't just like a day where like it's not like us on a vacation and it's just us. Like, we have guests here that are also coming in. It's not just about you running around having a good time. This party is for our love and to celebrate us. Everybody's here for us, even though they don't know the bride and groom, according to her.

SPEAKER_06 51:53

Yeah. Everybody's here for a reason. There's a wedding happening, and I got the strange invitation in the mail.

SPEAKER_04 52:00

Yeah, I mean, like, I totally get like the whole vibe of like, hey, I really want to have a lively dance floor, so can we make sure, like, at least at the beginning of the night, like everybody's kind of like dancing? It reminds me of Brian and Betty's wedding. Like, we're gonna bring the dance floor, everybody on the whole bridal party's coming in dancing. Yeah, like wake up the dance floor, be at the party, don't just be the groomsmen that are all just sitting outside in a circle smoking. Yeah, please be present in our day. I'm down for that. I'm down for that. Like, like I said, the spirit of it seems to make sense, but you also seem really stressed out, and he seems to be your laser focus if he's the reason you're stressed. Yeah, so you're trying to control him too much because did your mom make you wear a dress you didn't like? Are you sad because you didn't get to get the steak for dinner?

SPEAKER_06 52:50

It sounds like you just don't like this guy, and maybe you should have to do it.

SPEAKER_00 52:53

Does he make your husband less of a man for you because he's distracting him?

SPEAKER_06 52:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 52:58

Did they go out and play pool and you are sad because you don't get to go? Like, that's what it sounds like to me.

SPEAKER_06 53:03

She's probably trying to avoid him being like, like, you know, sorry, Stacy, but uh, we're this isn't gonna stop our three nights a week that we go out together and leave you at home. You know, this sounds like that kind of guy.

SPEAKER_04 53:17

She doesn't like that he still has bro time when she wants him to clean the gutters.

SPEAKER_06 53:20

Exactly.

SPEAKER_04 53:21

That's what it sounds like. And he seems to be the one who's like, You sure you want to marry your babe? Like, do you really want to be with her? She's giving me lists now.

SPEAKER_06 53:29

How many lists is she giving you? I sentence you to every single groomsman being late and to never getting a single present off of your wedding registry.

SPEAKER_04 53:40

Every it's every single thing you get in your wedding registry comes in in the wrong color.

SPEAKER_06 53:44

Oh, exactly. It's all mismatched.

SPEAKER_04 53:46

Yes, or it's like the wrong Your Fiesta wear comes in every single color instead of the pretty slate blue you want it. Yeah. No, no. However, this is probably the groomsman during the cake cutting that's screaming, smash it in her face.

SPEAKER_06 54:00

Yeah, probably. You know, so like the groomsman's not innocent. He sounds like an ass.

SPEAKER_04 54:05

No, but he's probably also the one that's dancing with grandma during sexy back. Do you know what I mean? Like, you got it. You know who he is. He's been your partner's best friend for longer than probably you've known him. You know? So, like, he's coming along too. You're not getting rid of him.

SPEAKER_06 54:24

No way. No way.

SPEAKER_04 54:26

Bros before brides. Just kidding. But like, maybe in this situation.

SPEAKER_06 54:32

If you guys have anything that you've seen that's like a post on Reddit or on these old forums that you want us to read.

SPEAKER_04 54:41

Or if you have been in a wedding in the last, you know, millennia and you have been given a weird criteria from the couple. I would love to hear what their crazy rules were on the day. So please send them.

SPEAKER_06 54:54

Please, please, please. Okay. Now, round us off. I have.

SPEAKER_04 54:59

What are we doing? Because you've been really like hush hush about what we're doing today.

SPEAKER_06 55:04

I have. It's nothing special. Well, you haven't told me, so I'm excited. Um, I have a bunch of different wedding trivia because contrary-wedding trivia? Yeah, contrary to popular belief, weddings aren't new. Weddings have been happening for a really long time.

SPEAKER_03 55:18

Since the dawn of time, since the first dinosaur gave his other dinosaur friend another dead dinosaur. Yes. Did I win?

SPEAKER_06 55:28

Babe, will you marry me? And it's, you know, two stick of stuff. Is that a yes? Um, so I've I've developed some wedding trivia. You've developed it or you've compiled it? I've compiled it. Okay. I'd say it.

SPEAKER_04 55:43

Did you make this up?

SPEAKER_06 55:44

This is this is in weddings. This is in Jeopardy or uh this style tri trivia, which you just have questions. They're not questions. It's always like is like a did you know type thing? Pretty much. Am I gonna have to fill in the blanks? Pretty much. Alright, let's do it. Just like just like Jeopardy. So what what what is the ding day? Yeah, they're called this questions because it's it's uh it's always like people when they make a sandwich will always use this, and then you and then you answer the trivia. Bread? Yes, correct. You're you're off to a great start, you're on fire.

SPEAKER_04 56:19

We put points above my head.

SPEAKER_06 56:20

Yeah, sure. And then um, do you want to win something at the end?

SPEAKER_09 56:24

Oh no.

SPEAKER_06 56:29

All right, here we go. Uh, question one. Okay. Before their wedding, Moroccan women traditionally do this to purify themselves.

SPEAKER_04 56:39

Vaginal steaming.

SPEAKER_06 56:41

Smoking. You are incredibly close, actually. Really? I just why why vaginal?

SPEAKER_04 56:49

Well, you've you've seen that, right? Where like you sit over like a pot of steam. I mean, like, that's that's actually a thing all over the world where people use smoke to purify their lady bits.

SPEAKER_06 56:57

You are you are technically correct. I'm gonna give you half a point.

SPEAKER_04 57:03

I got a technical I would get points for technicality, vaginal steaming.

SPEAKER_06 57:07

This is this is a uh uh specific thing called a hamam, which is just a word for like a steam bath, right? And most of the time, uh Moroccan women will take all of their family members and friends that are female to a hamam spa, and they will all go get steams, but specifically the bride will usually steam themselves in milk and rose water so to purify their skin. So you're technically it probably it probably does go there. In a lot of it have to be fashionable.

SPEAKER_04 57:39

No, in a lot of in a lot uh please back me up in the comments because this is a thing, and also I'm gonna educate you after this. A lot of people, um, so there's tribes in Africa where they actually use like um smoke with different herbs and stuff like that, and they'll put their skirts over it and like smoke their lady bits, and then a lot of the time in other places, like I mean, even around here, you can go to places and you literally sit over like a thing. It's like a glorified like toilet seat, and you put like a drape over it and you steam your lady bits. It's a thing.

SPEAKER_06 58:11

You're talking about smoking vagina, and I I don't know if you know this about me, babe, but I smoke a lot of meat all the time. So that's no, no, no. What are yeah, what kind of rub, what kind of dry rub are we using on this? You know, it's like incensing your lady bits. Yeah, I get that.

SPEAKER_04 58:28

It's it's like sitting over like a humidifier, like it's just bits to bits.

SPEAKER_06 58:33

Like a super low and slow, like what degrees do we get it up to?

SPEAKER_04 58:36

Until it's tender, baby.

SPEAKER_06 58:38

Yeah, until it falls off the bone. All right. Question number two. In ancient Rome, bridesmaids were required to do this to act as a decoy and confuse evil spirits.

SPEAKER_04 58:53

Dress like the bride? Yes, yeah, that's correct. That seems to make sense. I mean, like, if they're trying to keep bad luck away from the bride, then if they dress like the bride, then they'll potentially be that God, they're a human. I'm a human sacrifice! Why am I dressed like the bride?

SPEAKER_06 59:11

Yeah, dude. I'm a sacrifice. Do you hunter take and then an evil spirit comes down like a terodent? Go, Megan, go! Yeah, scoops up Megan, and she's like, ah!

SPEAKER_07 59:22

Float away. And she's like, Where, where, were you?

SPEAKER_06 59:25

Oh, phew. It took Megan and not me, and not the real bride. That's so funny. Um, great job. Yeah, that's a that's another. It's a point and a half now. Um, question Ancient Greek and Roman brides wore this to ward off evil spirits who were jealous of their happiness.

SPEAKER_04 59:41

Garlic.

SPEAKER_06 59:43

No.

SPEAKER_04 59:44

Is it like a food?

SPEAKER_06 59:45

No. Okay, okay, okay. They wore they wore something. So ancient Roman and Greek brides would wear this to ward off hap or ward off evil spirits who were jealous of their happiness.

SPEAKER_04 59:58

A veil?

SPEAKER_06 59:59

It is a veil.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:00

A veil, so they couldn't see that they were happy.

SPEAKER_06 1:00:02

Wow, I thought a lot of these would stump you more.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:04

Well, it seems like this is where traditions came from, and they've just kind of been passed down. So I'm trying to figure out like what do brides wear? Brides wear veils. You said like Roman and Greek, and what do they ward off? And I'm just like, vampires like garlic.

SPEAKER_06 1:00:17

Um, let's see. Hell yeah. Uh, next question. In ancient Rome, the groom carried the bride across the threshold to prevent her from doing this.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:31

Bringing in dirt from her past life, from her past family.

SPEAKER_08 1:00:36

No.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:42

I don't know. To prevent her from doing something?

SPEAKER_04 1:00:46

Running.

SPEAKER_07 1:00:50

Now get back in here.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:51

This is your house?

SPEAKER_06 1:00:53

No, I don't know. What is it? It's tripping. Um, tripping, which was considered a because women didn't know how to walk that dude. A good thing I have a man now to help me.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:05

Like, after she gets over it the first time, is it kind of like when you teach a dog to go down the stairs? Like when they're a puppy, like you have to like, this is a step. You have to lift your feet over it to get in. Because before that, you didn't ever go in a house.

SPEAKER_07 1:01:19

Where were these women from? Oh, I never knew. Oh wow, thanks. I'm so confused. She didn't mansplain doors to your bride.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:27

That's great. I'm gonna say, was it because of like ornate garments she was wearing?

SPEAKER_06 1:01:31

No, it was literally because tripping was considered a curse and bad luck on marriage.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:37

Okay, that makes more sense then.

SPEAKER_06 1:01:38

Okay, it was just a superstition, but it's become more of a thing.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:42

Of I'm bringing you into our marriage. Okay, that's actually really sweet.

SPEAKER_06 1:01:45

So before flowers, um, before flowers were the standards, brides carried this in their bouquets to keep evil spirits away. Is that garlic? It is garlic, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:58

I knew it. Oh god, could you imagine like walking down the aisle? Like the bride the groom has his back turned, and the only reason he knows that his wife is about to walk down the aisle is because he's like, smell eggplant palm. Yeah. What up, baby? Here she comes. Here comes the bride.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:14

Oh my god. She smells like a restaurant.

SPEAKER_06 1:02:16

Oh my god, that must be my bride. She's walking down the aisle, can smell garlic. Turn around, it's a dude with like a plate of like garlic palm wings. She's replied.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:23

All right.

unknown 1:02:24

This is even better.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:26

I'll carry this into the house.

SPEAKER_06 1:02:28

So great, great job. Great job, yes. Garlic stinky.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:32

Stinky bride.

SPEAKER_06 1:02:33

The wedding ring is worn on the fourth finger of the left hand because it was believed to contain this.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:39

A vein deleting leading directly to your heart. Yeah. I know that.

SPEAKER_06 1:02:43

I didn't think you would know that.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:45

I'm a jeweler. I know all of it. But that's like the thing. That's why you wear ears because it's it's said to be a direct link to your heart, and that's where your marriage is.

SPEAKER_06 1:02:53

This was from um that's from Greek and Roman times, right? And so it's always like it's romantic. It's like, oh, there's a vein that goes directly to the heart, but it's like first of all, all veins go directly to the heart.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:04

That's not true. And secondly, that's not true. Idiot. I'm a phlebotomist.

SPEAKER_06 1:03:08

I know where veins go. Secondly, the the other thing is that the reality of it is it's it's some um, you know, uh ancient nerd that's looking at a cadaver and goes, Wow, look at this. This red string goes from the finger to the heart.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:25

Dude, I don't want to hear it. We can let the stars determine whether or not we're gonna make money this week. Do you know what I mean? Or whether or not we're it's gonna like rain. Like, no, I don't want to hear that. Like, yeah, this to me is at least like a thing. It's sweet.

SPEAKER_06 1:03:40

Did you see what pistachio discovered? Our bodies are full of ropes.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:46

Pistachio is the name of Dana Carvey and the Master of Disguise. It is pistachio.

SPEAKER_06 1:03:52

Um, good job, babies. Um, in 1477, Mary of Burgundy became the first person in history to receive this for her wedding.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:03

To receive something for the first person to receive something. Yes, in history. History?

SPEAKER_06 1:04:10

Yes.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:11

To receive something for her wedding. Is it this still follows along the lines of like this is something people receive at a wedding now and has become tradition?

SPEAKER_06 1:04:22

That is the word that I said, yes, is they received it at their wedding.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:26

No, no, no. Like she received it at so like the same way like we said, like before, like this is where veils came from, this is where carrying over the threshold. Is this still something that could be has followed through to today? Could be. I'm trying to this is like when we asked.

SPEAKER_06 1:04:41

How'd you take a crack at it, baby?

SPEAKER_04 1:04:43

She was the first to receive something at her wedding?

SPEAKER_06 1:04:47

For her wedding.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:48

For her wedding. Something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:54

But she was burgundy, so it couldn't have been blue.

SPEAKER_06 1:04:58

What could it be? Something burgundy.

unknown 1:05:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:01

Something burgundy. I brought a carpet.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:02

Two use at her wedding?

SPEAKER_06 1:05:05

Before her wedding.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:07

Okay, your prepositional phrase isn't helping. Like, I'm asking, like, because I'm I'm really trying to figure out like what could it have been? And also I'm thinking of like the 1400s, so like it wasn't like a stretch limo.

SPEAKER_08 1:05:20

Could have been.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:21

Was it like a horse and carriage?

SPEAKER_06 1:05:23

No.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:23

Okay.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:25

You're not helping. Yeah, that's the whole point of trivia.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:28

No, no, you helped, you helped me.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:31

Is it a horse? No. Oh is it of flowers?

SPEAKER_04 1:05:37

Well, no, but you said she received it for her wedding, and I'm thinking like what do people have she could have received it for her to use at the wedding.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:46

She could have received it for her to have at the wedding. She could have received it for her because she is like for a wedding. Like you're you're having a You're getting married, so you have this, you know, kind of thing.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:03

Your white wedding dress.

SPEAKER_06 1:06:04

No. What is it? It is an engagement ring. She's the first person in history to ever receive an engagement wing ring. An engagement chicken wing. Well, engagement wing. She's a voice poisoned east wing. Really? Yeah. 1477.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:22

But like, didn't other people give things to like betrothed themselves to somebody? But like she was the first person to be proposed to with a ring. Yeah. Is this the first person recorded to be with a ring? If you were the first person who ever got a ring, let us know in the comments. Like if you were there before 1477 and you weren't from Burgundy, but you didn't know this happened, you're like, no, I actually got a ring in 1476. Let me know in the comments.

SPEAKER_06 1:06:47

That was so last. That was so last year, last century. Holy that's good. Oh, she was the first one to get a ring. Everybody else would give like gold and oils, frankincense, and myrrh. Okay. I don't think Marry Me Jesus.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:06

Um I was married Joseph and Jesus, not it's on fire.

SPEAKER_06 1:07:14

It hurts, it burns. Because it hosts over a hundred thousand weddings a year. This city is known as the wedding capital of the world.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:21

New York City.

SPEAKER_06 1:07:22

No.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:23

San Francisco. Nope. San Diego.

SPEAKER_06 1:07:25

No.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:25

Paris.

SPEAKER_06 1:07:26

No.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:26

Is it in this country? Yes. It's in this country.

SPEAKER_06 1:07:29

Yeah. Funny enough, it's Du Boise. It's Du Boise, Idaho. No, it's Vegas. Yes, it's Vegas.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:34

No, my brain was like, where do people go to get married? Like you see a lot of people like in New York City go to City Hall and they have like those big things. And then I don't know why I thought San Francisco. I just feel like there's a lot of space. A lot of weddings there. But no, Vegas, of course, Vegas. That makes sense.

SPEAKER_06 1:07:49

In 1981, Sheik Mohammed bin Rashad Al-Makone. Or sorry. Bryce, you can't even read engagement ring and you said that out loud. In in 1981, Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid Al-Maktom set a world record for the most expensive wedding, which costed this much.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:07

I saw a thing about this. I saw a thing.

SPEAKER_06 1:08:11

Crack. How expensive.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:13

I'm gonna I'm gonna lowball. Wasn't it like $300 million?

SPEAKER_06 1:08:17

No, it's lower than that.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:18

How much was it?

SPEAKER_06 1:08:19

It was $44 million.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:21

I knew it was like a high millions. I saw a thing about it. Some bride was like, yeah, no, I want to have the most expensive wedding. And they were like, the most expensive wedding was 40 something million dollars. And she was like, Well, how much is mine? They're like, not that.

SPEAKER_06 1:08:37

Oh, I think this set out something like, no, I can't be much more than just a couple, you know, just a couple nickels. A couple of nickels.

SPEAKER_07 1:08:44

How much is it? 44 billion dollars. And that's just for like the cakes.

SPEAKER_06 1:08:52

Oh my god. Um in 1840, Queen Victoria broke tradition at her own wedding and started a massive trend by doing this. Dancing with her husband. No. People were dancing far before that. No, like with her partner. Um ever since they were knocking each other with wooden clubs and then dancing.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:14

That's true. Um she broke tradition by doing this at her wedding.

SPEAKER_06 1:09:21

Broke broke tradition from from before, and it is now a new tradition that every pr pretty much everybody does.

SPEAKER_08 1:09:31

I'm stumped. I'm surprised.

SPEAKER_06 1:09:35

This was this one's the I I almost got rid of this question because I was like, the wording of it is strange because it's like she broke tradition and did what?

SPEAKER_04 1:09:42

I don't know what the previous tradition was, Bryce.

SPEAKER_06 1:09:45

That's the point.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:46

I know, but I don't know what what is it. She wore a white dress. See, that's what I so my thing was I was gonna say like maybe she wore like like a ball gown instead of like a simple dress. Like honestly, my my thought was with what she was wearing. I was gonna say maybe like she wore a veil, and you you didn't normally wear a veil between like this time and this time, or like for her culture or whatever. So, yeah, a white dress wasn't seen as like a thing to wear for weddings.

SPEAKER_06 1:10:12

It was usually like the most until the 19th century, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:16

Yeah, in in white culture. Yeah. We just wanted to show how white we can be.

SPEAKER_06 1:10:23

This is the inspiration for tiered design of traditional wedding cakes. Skyscrapers. You're really close. Really?

SPEAKER_04 1:10:33

Like houses, like houses? Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:10:35

No, you're really close. It's funny, I I didn't lead anything or whatever. You immediately went to buildings because it's it's the St. Bride's Church in London.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:43

So that's the thing, is a lot of people used to do these cakes where they were like multiple things to kind of like show different architectural styles. Thank you, buddy Velastro, the cake boss. That's literally the only reason because he The Royal Berry cake. The Royal Berry cake.

SPEAKER_05 1:10:58

The Royalberry cake.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:00

There's a scandal in the garden. It smells like blueberries.

SPEAKER_05 1:11:06

There's a scandal in the garden, and it smells like blueberries.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:10

But uh there's a scandal in the garden. No, because he actually spoke about how um he wished like those would come back because it was really fun to be able to do different like flavors on different tiers to show like the different like steeples and things like that. And that's how like a lot of people were able to do more flavors in cakes because it wasn't just one large wedding cake, it was multiple small ones around a bigger one, yeah, which is cool.

SPEAKER_06 1:11:35

I think probably his reasoning was like, Man, I'm so sick of making dragons and stuff for every cake. I wish I could just make simple shapes and make a chart. He's like, I have to I have to sculpt this one after a 10-year-old boy. I had to.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:50

And it's all made of cereal treats. This kid's just 90% modeling chooklet and cereal treats.

SPEAKER_07 1:11:59

I don't know how I'm gonna do I don't know how I'm gonna get this thing out of my shop.

SPEAKER_06 1:12:04

Then disaster strikes. Um the ancient warrior society of the Spartans are credited with inventing this traditional wedding tradition. What? This wedding tradition. The Spartans? Spartans? Sparta?

SPEAKER_04 1:12:20

Hiding the bride away from the groom before the wedding.

SPEAKER_06 1:12:24

You know, that's actually it. That's a really, really good guess. It's wrong, but it's a really good guess.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:27

But I mean, like, it feels like they're like stealthy, so they're like, keep the bride hidden until we know it's safe.

SPEAKER_06 1:12:32

Like that to me sounds like but Spartans are all bros. So what what do you think they would? The bachelor party. Yeah. Yeah, okay, that's cool. The stag party. Yeah, not only did they launch it.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:42

Well, because they would go out hunting and stuff and bring it back for the wedding, right?

SPEAKER_06 1:12:46

Uh, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:47

A lot of the time I feel like people did that as like a celebration.

SPEAKER_06 1:12:49

Like I'm I'm gonna guess because it's ancient times, it's probably they were probably taking them out to brothels. Have so much sex with a lot of people. And hunting them. They unic photography.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:04

Um out hunting.

SPEAKER_06 1:13:07

Uh they invented the bachelor party and they inadvertently invented swinging by calling it a stag night. So you're an idiot. Um the month of June became a wedding staple because it was named after this.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:22

Juno.

SPEAKER_06 1:13:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:23

Yeah, the god of love and star or Zeus's wife. Yes, yes, who he loved. Yes, I didn't know that.

SPEAKER_06 1:13:29

Oh, no, it's not Zeus's wife. It was one of Zeus' mistresses. Mistress I. And no, it was it was based on a body. Sorry, Juno is not uh Juno is Roman. Juno Juno is not Greek, so it would have been whoever Roman Zeus is. Hey Google. Who is the Roman version of Zeus?

SPEAKER_02 1:13:55

Jupiter. According to Wikipedia.

SPEAKER_06 1:13:58

Jupiter is the equivalent of a Greek. Alright, shut up.

SPEAKER_02 1:14:01

Latin literature and Roman art. The midsenhit.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:03

Hey Google. Shut up.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:06

Reminds me of, don't you remember on all that? It was Kel Mitchell, and the only thing he could say was Jupiter!

SPEAKER_06 1:14:11

Jupiter.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:12

Jupiter. That's why I I did know that though.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:15

Nice. Good job. Um okay, well, we got five more to go. Ready? According to old English folklore, you should get married on this day of the week to ensure the best luck.

SPEAKER_02 1:14:29

Sunday.

SPEAKER_08 1:14:30

Wrong. You want to try one more time?

SPEAKER_04 1:14:33

I feel like it shouldn't be Friday.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:35

It's not.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:36

It's not Friday because Friday could be Friday the 13th, and Friday the 13th is bad.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:40

And that was, yeah. I don't know how long ago that was a thing. That movie was all parts of old English folklore.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:46

No, the number 13 has always been like associated with that, and I feel like Friday the 13th was also bad.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:52

Is it Wednesday? It is Wednesday. Right in the middle.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:55

It's right in the middle.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:56

Wednesday's the luckiest day to have a wedding, according to old English folklore.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:59

The only reason I went with Sunday is because everybody's like, get married on the day of the Lord, and he will be in your wedding. Like, I don't know. That's why I said Sunday first. But Wednesday, it makes the most sense. It's smack in the middle. It's neither good nor bad. It's right in the center, like a centered day. That's nice. If you had your wedding on a Wednesday, let me know how lucky it was.

SPEAKER_06 1:15:18

Yeah. What kind of luck have you brought it up?

SPEAKER_04 1:15:20

How lucky was your wedding?

SPEAKER_06 1:15:21

What kind of fortunes have you brought about?

SPEAKER_04 1:15:22

How lucky did you get on your wedding night? Because it was a Wednesday.

SPEAKER_06 1:15:26

Guests traditionally do this to the couple at weddings to ensure fertility and prosperity.

SPEAKER_02 1:15:35

Is that throwing rice at them?

SPEAKER_08 1:15:38

Yes, it is. It is.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:40

Yep. I did know that that's where that came from. There's also traditions, uh, I don't know if you know this, but like during like the bedding ceremony, um, there's there's also been like offshoots of this. I've seen it in Korean culture too, where the couple will hold a sheet and they have like pink balls and blue balls or like different colors or whatever, and they throw them to try to catch how many of whatever to show how many kids they'll have. And they used to do the same thing with like bedding ceremonies where they would throw things at them to say like how many kids they would have. And I I did know that that's also where like the rice came from was to show like growth and prosperity.

SPEAKER_06 1:16:13

Okay, yeah. But like, but like um that's kind of funny though, is transferred to like rice because it's like you're gonna have a million children.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:21

No, because rice grows really fast. It's like throwing bamboo at somebody. This grows through anything, it's resilient.

SPEAKER_06 1:16:28

Have a kid.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:31

Where are my grandbabies?

SPEAKER_06 1:16:35

Um the garter toss was invented as a distraction because guests used to try to take a piece of this at the end of the night for good luck. The bride's dress. It is the bride's dress.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:48

I did know that as well. How'd you know that? Because people were just insane. Like, I want to be married next. The bride just got married, I want a piece of it. Yeah. So, no, the garter toss, it and it makes it also like, you know, like if you're gonna get a piece of it, you get this. That's it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:17:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:17:03

And all brides wore garters because there was no elastic. Can you imagine nowadays, like you're the bride and you're just getting down to like Pink Pony Club or like you send her out like Hunger Game style in the backyard and have everybody chase her, but you leave out the train.

SPEAKER_06 1:17:18

Mine was a little more fun, a little more covert. Yours is like get her!

SPEAKER_04 1:17:23

No, mine's more like the purge. Yeah. Oh Bride has to like take off. I've once again picturing her running around in the grass and pomone hiding everywhere.

SPEAKER_06 1:17:36

Um in ancient times, flower girls didn't walk down the aisle with flowers to ensure fertility, they would walk down the aisle with this. Rice. No. Oh.

SPEAKER_04 1:17:48

For fertility, was it like an animal?

SPEAKER_06 1:17:50

No. That'd be sick though.

SPEAKER_04 1:17:52

Like a chicken.

SPEAKER_06 1:17:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:17:53

Because they just pop out eggs left and right, or like a bunny? Maybe a rabbit? Because rabbits produce like rabbits. Um that's actually kind of adorable. It's not the answer, but I feel like if you were to walk down the aisle with a bunny to symbolize fertility, that's actually like um, is it is it like a food or something like that?

SPEAKER_09 1:18:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:18:13

Okay. Is this something you see traditionally at weddings now?

SPEAKER_09 1:18:18

No.

SPEAKER_02 1:18:19

Okay, so this is just like something that you died.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:22

Um it wasn't flowers, but it was something to show fertility.

SPEAKER_02 1:18:28

Was it like oils or something?

SPEAKER_06 1:18:30

No, but it wasn't. What was it? No, it was wheat. They would walk down with with wheat and grain. I said you asked if it was food, and I said yes.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:44

You're right. I was so like I meant like that's why I was funny because that was weird.

SPEAKER_06 1:18:50

It's like oils like canola oil.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:52

No, it's funny because I was actually thinking like bread. I could see somebody walking down with like a really pretty, like, braided loaf of bread to show like prosperity. Um I have a fuzzy. Sorry.

SPEAKER_06 1:19:02

Old folklore technically considers this day of the week to be the most unlucky day to have your wedding.

unknown 1:19:09

Friday. No.

SPEAKER_04 1:19:10

Human. I my whole thing that I said before is nonsense.

SPEAKER_06 1:19:13

It's actually the most popular day to have a wedding. It's Saturdays. Saturdays are the most unlucky day to have weddings, according to old folklore.

SPEAKER_04 1:19:20

Well, I mean, I suppose it's because wedding, like a lot of people don't work on weekends, and it was like a day off. It was the day right before the Sabbath, so a lot of stuff is happening to get stuff done for Sunday. So I guess like since a lot of people are out and bustling, things can go wrong.

SPEAKER_06 1:19:35

I would say probably if I had to take a guess. How old is this folklore?

SPEAKER_04 1:19:39

I would say because like our grandparents' folklore.

SPEAKER_06 1:19:42

Baby people weren't working as much on Saturdays in older times. And because people were working as much, they were doing their hobbies. And if they were doing their hobbies, that's dangerous, they probably would were dying more often than when they were working. So they were Yeah, your officiant got skewered.

SPEAKER_04 1:19:58

Actually, yeah, sorry, your caterer can't make it. Um, he was crushed by his log house he was building.

SPEAKER_06 1:20:04

Yeah. Sorry. Where's where's my dad? You open the let me go check on my pottery real quick.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:09

Ah, dad's in the kiln again.

SPEAKER_06 1:20:12

Again.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:14

I've had so many dads. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:20:16

Holy shit. Um, that's my wedding trivia. That was awesome. I like way to go. Wait a way to catch most of that. I've stopped keeping track of how many of them got right. It's really pointless.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:28

Bounce up and down, just like the clown. Everyone knows it's thinky.

SPEAKER_06 1:20:32

I'm just gonna play like an old commercial.

SPEAKER_04 1:20:37

No, I honestly like I know a lot of that traditional stuff already because it's kind of like it makes sense. Yeah, you know, like if they why were bridesmaids around to, you know, deter spirits away from the bride, look like the bride, so the spirits can't necessarily there's less of a chance. Yeah, you know, trying to keep the spirits from being jealous, a lot of tider face.

SPEAKER_06 1:20:58

So a lot of the trivia that I was reading was like all of the exposition and stuff of it, and I was like, I need to rewrite all these so that they're questions, they're yeah, not only are the questions, but they kind of lead you to the answer. Because a lot of it's like, because if it was like, where did cakes come from? You'd be like, um yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:15

The Wegmans. I got them at the store.

SPEAKER_06 1:21:20

If you guys have any wedding trivia um that we didn't mention today, any fan facts about weddings, um, leave them in the comments. I want to hear all about it.

SPEAKER_04 1:21:28

Hell yeah. Well, that was today's episode of For Better or Worse. What was that? Our fifth episode?

SPEAKER_06 1:21:33

No, this is the sixth episode. No way. Yeah, Lauren's is the one with the Lauren's. I thought that was the fourth. No.

SPEAKER_04 1:21:39

Oh my god, we're doing a thing. This is amazing.

SPEAKER_06 1:21:42

It's pretty cool.

SPEAKER_04 1:21:43

Don't forget to RSVP to this channel by clicking subscribe and to be notified when we put out a new video. Ring the wedding bell below. Bye.

SPEAKER_06 1:21:52

Bye. Perfect. Document our love.