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Dr Ben and Friends

Capillary Comedy

September 13, 2026 • Team Dr Ben • Season 1 • Episode 35

0:00 | 11:06

Medical jargon sounds harmless until you learn what it actually describes. We kick things off with a simple premise: hand a comedian a handful of real ER and cardiology terms, ask her to pronounce them, ask her to guess what they mean, then translate the truth in plain English. Comedian Kristan Barczak delivers!

The result is a mix of laugh-out-loud wrong answers, surprisingly sharp instincts, and a clearer sense of how healthcare teams use shorthand under pressure.

Dr. Domenic joins us as the medical translator, and Kristen bravely walks into the “What The Heck” hot seat.

We unpack asystole and why “flatline” is more than a movie moment. We tackle STEMI and what makes that acronym a time-sensitive kind of heart attack.

Then we dig into AFib with RVR, breaking down atria vs ventricles, what fibrillation looks like, and how controlled electricity can sometimes restore rhythm.

We wrap with cap refill, a quick bedside check that links circulation and hydration to something you can see with your own fingernail. Try it now!

If you’ve ever left an appointment thinking, “Wait, what did that word mean?”, this one is for you.

Subscribe for more comedy-meets-medicine, share the episode with a friend who loves learning, and leave a review. What medical term should we put in the game next?

THANKS TO OUR GUESTS:

Kristan Barczak (Comedian, Writer, Mom)

Instagram: @kristanbcomedy

https://www.kristanbarczak.com/

Dr Domenic (Chief Medical Officer, Emergency Medicine Physician, Pilot, DJ)

https://www.staypositive.news/article/tristar-skyline-welcomes-new-chief-medical-officer-dominec-martinello-md

DR BEN AND FRIENDS PODCAST:

This episode was produced by Angie Debelak with post-production editing by Ben Hill Sound.

Thanks for listening to Dr Ben and Friends. Laughter is the best medicine...unless you're treating bowel or bladder incontinence. See you next time!

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DISCLAIMER: Dr Ben and Friends Podcast

Quick heads-up folks: Dr Ben and Friends is your weekly dose of laughs and stories. We celebrate healthcare heroes and pro comics.

This is infotainment-- think popcorn, not prescriptions or medical advice.

If you're feeling funky, see your medical professional. Your health? That's on you. We'll stick to the punchlines.

Welcome And The Game Setup

THEME SONG 0:05

Dr. Ben and Friends!

Dr Ben 0:09

All right, knock knock how dy cooks. Dr. Ben here. Welcome to the Dr. Ben and Friends podcast where we put the med in comedy. See what I did there? I like that. Med in comedy. Today we're celebrating healthcare heroes and comics who help make our lives healthier and funnier. My guests today are a triple threat here, emergency room physician, DJ, and pilot, Dr. Domenic. Hey everyone. Alright, thanks for being here. And an emerging up and coming Nashville comic writer, mother, Kristan Barczak.

Kristan Barczak 0:42

Hey everybody.

Dr Ben 0:43

Did I pronounce your name correctly?

Kristan Barczak 0:45

You did. That's okay, good. Thank you. Are you all ready to play what the heck? Alright, you're asking yourself, what the heck is what the heck? Well, what the heck is Dr. Dominic here is going to show Miss Kristan some medical terms, terms that uh the folks in the medical field uh see and use uh perhaps daily, but that uh a comedian, author, and mother may not have heard unless she watches The Pit. Don't okay, so medicine makes me queasy, the whole field.

Dr Domenic 1:22

Just everything about it. Queasy. Everything, anything medical.

Kristan Barczak 1:25

Like I never watched Grey's Anatomy. I never like I

Dr Ben 1:28

Scrubs?

Kristan Barczak 1:29

I did watch a little bit of Scrubs.

Dr Ben 1:30

Did that make you queasy?

Kristan Barczak 1:31

Um I think I think I block blocked it out of my brain because I actually don't really remember much of it at all.

Speaker 1 1:38

Okay. And then uh uh Kristan will A, try to pronounce the words and B tell us what they mean and uh what the heck. So, listener, I want you to play along too. And listener, put in the comments below what uh words we should show our comedians, what medical terms that you would like them to define. All right. Are we ready to play, y'all? We're ready. All right, Dr. Domenic, please show Miss Kristan our first what the heck word.

Dr Domenic 2:04

You're ready?

Kristan Barczak 2:04

I'm ready. I'm as ready as I'm gonna be.

Dr Ben 2:06

Okay.

Asystole Pronunciation And Flatline Meaning

Kristan Barczak 2:07

Aristotle.

Dr Ben 2:08

Aristotle. We are an Athens of the South. We are an Athens of the Nashville.

Dr Domenic 2:13

That's good.

Kristan Barczak 2:13

Dr Ben 2:13

Nashville is Aristotle Athens of the South.

Kristan Barczak 2:16

That's clearly not Aristotle. That's like a a sistole or a sistole. Um I believe that this is the

Dr Ben 2:22

Wait just a second. How'd you do my pronunciation?

Dr Domenic 2:24

It's just close. She's close. Asystole.

Kristan Barczak 2:33

Uh assistile. I I believe that is um that is when that is a when somebody puts on their fancy scrubs, they call it their assistally. Yeah.

Dr Ben 2:43

Fancy scrubs.

Kristan Barczak 2:44

You can say, like, I'm in my assistally today.

Dr Domenic 2:47

Could be a very fancy way of calling your assistant, right? Like, that's my assistally.

Dr Ben 2:50

And you all know my assistally. All right. Very fancy scrubs, like the ones we have uh ironed and starched.

Dr Domenic 2:57

Yeah, yeah, like if

Kristan Barczak 2:58

you're really trying to make a good impression.

Dr Ben 3:00

For a press conference.

Kristan Barczak 3:00

You put on your assistally.

Dr Domenic 3:01

And that's what you know I have my like like you know, show scrubs and my real scrubs, right? Yeah.

Dr Ben 3:06

I like it. Do you have separate pair?

Dr Domenic 3:07

No. Okay.

Dr Ben 3:08

Maybe for the medical staff meetings, you show up in your life.

Dr Domenic 3:11

Although I didn't uh in residency once I brought, you know, I lived in Brooklyn and we didn't have washers, dryers. So I took all my stuff to the local laundromat and dropped it off. They pressed creases and starched everything. So I showed up the next day at like 3 a.m. for my shift and like these perfectly pressed and starched scrubs, and people looked at me, they're like, Are you okay? And I was like, I I I can't wash them out.

Kristan Barczak 3:31

They said they said it's really early in the morning for your systole eye.

Dr Ben 3:37

How close was she, Dr. Domenic, to the meaning?

Dr Domenic 3:40

So the meaning, asystole. No, I don't want to say we weren't close, but but but it what it means is so asystole means no electrical activity in the heart.

Kristan Barczak 3:48

Oh, that needs a less fun word.

Dr Domenic 3:52

So the A without and then systole is the is heart contraction. So without heart contracting.

Kristan Barczak 3:58

That's sad.

Dr Domenic 3:59

Yeah. So it's uh when they say like flatline, that's a systole.

Dr Ben 4:03

Patients and asystole when they flatline. Yeah. I'm an orthopedic surgeon, so I'm learning a lot from these two because I don't know what these mean either.

Dr Domenic 4:09

No, the heart just pumps Ancef to the bone, right?

Dr Ben 4:11

That's right. There's a funny cartoon online with uh like an anesthesiologist and uh orthopedic surgeon talking to each other. Have you seen that?

Dr Domenic 4:18

Oh, yeah, but uh asystole and that's I don't know what that is, but I need to fix the bone.

Dr Ben 4:22

Yeah, yeah. Patient has this condition called a systole. There will be minimal blood loss. He's like, there is a fracture. Where is the fracture? In the emergency room. I need to fix it.

Kristan Barczak 4:34

I'm over here going like we're over here joking about a systole. I'm like, that's somebody's trauma. Like, I'm like somebody's like could be a level one trauma. Could be

Dr Ben 4:42

all right, ready for word

STEMI Explained As A Heart Attack

Dr Ben 4:44

or acronym versus an acronym.

Dr Domenic 4:45

Oh, it's an acronym.

Kristan Barczak 4:46

It's an acronym. Okay.

Dr Ben 4:47

Sound it out. What is this?

Speaker 4 4:49

Uh so that's STEMI, or possibly STMI. Uh and I believe that it stands for standard textbook endocrine management institutions.

Dr Ben 5:04

So it's an institution. That's another one.

Kristan Barczak 5:06

Somewhere where you go to learn, we just decided that it's an institution for people who want to learn the standard textbook version of the I think it's pronounced endocrine system. I don't even know what that's like.

Dr Ben 5:19

For the endocrine system.

Kristan Barczak 5:21

Yes.

Dr Domenic 5:23

I love that you came up with words for it. I'm thinking like, what the heck? What could we come up with with these? I know,

Dr Ben 5:28

She's sharp.

Dr Domenic 5:28

right?

Kristan Barczak 5:28

Tried. Okay.

Dr Ben 5:30

Uh Dr. Domenic, A on her pronunciation, and B, is it a medical institution to learn about the state?

Dr Domenic 5:35

No, we stem-we call this STEMI.

Kristan Barczak 5:37

STEMI. That's cute. STEMI.

Dr Domenic 5:40

It's a Latin acronym, right? That's the Latin form of it. Yeah. STEM I would be like the French. STEMI. STEMI? So it's ST elevation myocardial infarction. It's a specific kind of heart attack.

Kristan Barczak 5:52

Oh my gosh. These are so sad.

Dr Domenic 5:54

They're fun, but you know.

Kristan Barczak 5:55

I also want you to know that like the word that the I starts with, I I couldn't even pronounce that. Infarction? And what?

Dr Domenic 6:01

Infarction.

Kristan Barczak 6:03

I'm so sorry.

Dr Ben 6:05

Infarction.

Dr Domenic 6:05

Sounds dirty. No.

Dr Ben 6:06

Sounds like sounds flatulent.

Kristan Barczak 6:10

It does. It does.

Dr Ben 6:13

So it's a heart attack.

Dr Domenic 6:15

Yep. It's a heart attack.

Kristan Barczak 6:16

Which I've heard involves flatulence, right?

Dr Ben 6:18

Like it could.

Dr Domenic 6:20

It could. I mean depends which side of it you're on, I guess.

Kristan Barczak 6:24

Okay.

Dr Ben 6:24

So close. Not a medical institution, but heart attack. Heart attack, yeah.

Dr Domenic 6:28

That's a kind of heart attack, yeah.

Kristan Barczak 6:29

Oh man.

AFib With RVR And Defibrillation

Dr Domenic 6:30

All right. Ready for more?

Kristan Barczak 6:31

I'm ready.

Dr Ben 6:33

Okay, Kristan, what is this word?

Kristan Barczak 6:34

That's an AFib with RVR, because I I can read the short words.

Dr Ben 6:38

How is she on her pronunciation?

Dr Domenic 6:40

Good. Perfect. Spot on. Honorary ER doc.

Kristan Barczak 6:43

Uh and we're gonna go. That that's that's a lie with a side of resuscitation variants. Resuscitation again. Sorry, I'm trying to make the RVR. Um no, I actually, I mean, it's tempting to make the joke about the lie, but I know that a fibrillator is the shocky thing, right?

Dr Domenic 7:03

It's a defibrillator.

Kristan Barczak 7:04

Okay. Oh, so you're adding adding. So wait, if you're defibrillating with this is me doing that. This is me saving someone.

Dr Domenic 7:11

This is how we do it. Okay.

Kristan Barczak 7:12

For listeners who can't see, I am just

Dr Ben 7:14

defibrillating.

Kristan Barczak 7:15

Just hitting the air with very little force. It's just like a cutesy little um defib defibrill. I can't even say that one. Um so if you're adding shocks, perhaps you're taking away the shocks.

Dr Domenic 7:26

Okay.

Kristan Barczak 7:26

And you're you're taking away the shocks with your with your friend's RV camper.

Dr Ben 7:33

Okay. RV, a recreational vehicle.

Kristan Barczak 7:35

Recreational vehicle.

Dr Ben 7:36

Does it involve a recreational vehicle?

Dr Domenic 7:37

Uh no, well, it could.

Dr Ben 7:38

Does it involve lying at all?

Dr Domenic 7:39

I mean, it depends. No.

Speaker 3 7:40

Not lying. A fib? Okay.

Dr Domenic 7:42

There's no lying. We don't fib. We never fib. No. We're honest people. So ready for it?

Kristan Barczak 7:48

Yeah.

Dr Domenic 7:49

So A is for atrial.

Kristan Barczak 7:50

Okay.

Dr Domenic 7:50

That's the top part of the heart. Uh-huh. So you have atria and ventricles.

Kristan Barczak 7:54

Okay.

Dr Domenic 7:55

Fibrillation. Okay. There's your fun word for the day. Also. Means like shaking.

Kristan Barczak 7:59

Okay.

Dr Domenic 7:59

Like jarring. Like if you hit a bowl of jello. Yeah, that's kind of what it looks like. And then with R VR.

Dr Ben 8:06

Recreational vehicle.

Dr Domenic 8:06

Recreational vehicle, right?

Kristan Barczak 8:08

No.

Dr Domenic 8:08

Wait, what is it? No. Rapid ventricular response. Oh. So fast. And the and so the atrium is the top, the ventricle is the bottom.

Kristan Barczak 8:17

Gotcha.

Dr Domenic 8:17

And response just means it is responding. So the top part of your heart's jiggling like jello and the bottom part's just squeezing really fast.

Kristan Barczak 8:23

Is that something that somebody does on purpose?

Dr Domenic 8:25

Dr Domenic 8:26

Dr Ben 8:26

It's life-threatening?

Dr Domenic 8:27

No, so remember you were talking about the defibrillator.

Kristan Barczak 8:29

Uh-huh.

Dr Domenic 8:30

Where you're like shocking people? Well, we can use that to fix this.

Kristan Barczak 8:33

Okay.

Dr Domenic 8:34

So you give people a little electricity.

Kristan Barczak 8:36

I was trying to figure out. It sounds like a medieval medical procedure where it's like, okay, we're just gonna shake the top half of the heart and then the bottom part, we're just gonna, we're just gonna pump really fast.

Dr Domenic 8:46

So you have atrial fibrillation, which you can defibrillate.

Kristan Barczak 8:50

Okay.

Dr Domenic 8:50

See, isn't that fun? Yeah.

Kristan Barczak 8:52

I don't know why my medieval impersonation was like a

Dr Ben 8:55

like a pirate. Arr come me hearties.

Dr Domenic 9:00

A lot of rum involved.

Kristan Barczak 9:01

I actually think I was impersonating my dad a little bit.

Dr Ben 9:03

Okay. He's from the medieval times.

Kristan Barczak 9:06

Yeah. Oh my god. Okay. Yeah, and I didn't even I have a new fear. I didn't know that your heart could do that.

Dr Domenic 9:14

Oh, yeah.

Dr Ben 9:14

Oh, it can do all sorts of things.

Dr Domenic 9:15

It can do lots of weird things.

Kristan Barczak 9:16

Oh no.

Dr Domenic 9:17

Some of them we can fix with electricity.

Kristan Barczak 9:19

Okay.

Dr Ben 9:19

Um, and so listener, I guess my uh PSA would be never lie to a cardiologist. They can always spot a fib. Yeah. They can spot a fib. Okay. All right, ready for the next word. We're just gonna stay all right. Here's the next word.

Cap Refill And Quick Dehydration Check

Kristan Barczak 9:36

Cap refill. Yeah.

Dr Ben 9:37

How'd she do on pronunciation?

Kristan Barczak 9:39

Perfect.

Dr Ben 9:39

All right.

Kristan Barczak 9:40

Cap me off. Pour me another one.

Dr Ben 9:42

No cap. No cap as the kids say.

Dr Domenic 9:44

No cap, no refill.

Kristan Barczak 9:47

What are we refilling? We're refilling. We're refilling mugs. We're refilling uh heart electricity. We're yeah, we're we're refilling something that's you know what? We're giving somebody more water, so then maybe they don't have one of these crazy hard attacks.

Dr Ben 10:06

Okay. Yeah, I think they're dehydrated. Like, could I get a refill?

Dr Domenic 10:09

So the good news is the cap refill would get better if you gave them more water.

Kristan Barczak 10:13

Oh.

Dr Domenic 10:13

See, so it is related. So it's capillary refill.

Kristan Barczak 10:16

Oh, okay.

Dr Domenic 10:17

So it's those little little tiny blood vessels. So if you take your finger and it's pink and you squeeze the fingertip under your nail, you'll see your nail goes white.