We need to rant - find out what is really pissing us off lately

This week, we unpack what has been driving us bonkers. But the real question is: are our frustrations justified, or are we being completely unreasonable? 

We are putting each other's pet peeves under the microscope, weighing in on whether they're warranted, wildly dramatic, or somewhere in between. Expect strong opinions and plenty of laughs. Let us know whose side you are on!

Insta: https://www.instagram.com/unhingedgreekspodcast
Video Edits: Tom from Podlike.Online https://www.instagram.com/podlike.online/

Link to the Reply only Friend on Mama Mia https://www.mamamia.com.au/tig-notaro-cheryl-hines-reply-only-friend/

Follow us for more chaos, questionable takes, and what our friendship really looks like away from the Mic! 

Insta: https://www.instagram.com/unhingedgreekspodcast

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Yes. How are you, Kat?

SPEAKER_03 0:05

I'm good.

SPEAKER_05 0:06

How are you? This is actually a really rogue episode. It is.

SPEAKER_04 0:12

I'll let you talk about it. Look, usually we start with what is sending each of us over the edge. Yeah. But this whole episode is going to be about what is sending us over the edge. So we're just going to have a little rant about everything. I think we'll probably have enough enough time to do a couple of rants each. We don't know what each other's rants are. No. So we can, I guess, help each other unpack the frustrations.

SPEAKER_05 0:37

Yeah, I think a couple of rants, definitely ending with an unhinged question because I love that. You know, we often bitch and whine to each other just about like honestly, we must sound like angry people. I am quite an angry person.

SPEAKER_03 0:59

You're so infectious. And you know, but infectious.

SPEAKER_00 1:03

Yeah, like your laugh is infectious.

SPEAKER_05 1:05

I'm like contagious.

SPEAKER_03 1:07

Contagious.

SPEAKER_05 1:08

Actually, you know, saying that I remember, so I was um a bridesmaid for one of my best mates' wedding um from high school. He is a he, Grasso. Anyways, which is really rare to write because why would you be like bridesmaids for a male? Anyways, so I was best friends, uh sorry, bridesmaid at this wedding. He's also straight. He's also straight, yes, yes, yes, yes. And he's one of his groomsmen was my crush in high school. I loved him. Absolutely. Yes, yes, Milo.

SPEAKER_04 1:38

He was the absolute love of my high school life. Did you do your sick his like your signature with his surname on the books? I mean come on, like everyone's.

SPEAKER_05 1:47

I can't remember. I don't know. I I can't remember. Cassandra Smith. I used to like the walls. It's Milo, he's served anyway.

SPEAKER_03 1:59

You and you're whites. No, I'm just making it up. It's just a white name. Being very racist.

SPEAKER_05 2:06

Anyways, and I haven't seen Milo, so this wedding was what, it was around COVID time, sort of a few years ago now. And I remember in the lead up to I'm not gonna want to say Marlo, I haven't seen him in years. He's been on my social media, but he doesn't post, so you know, really didn't know anything about him. So I thought he was married with two kids, and then the the it was interesting, the bride and the groom wanted to do photos before the ceremony, so they wanted to do like the reveal that way, which was really special. So we obviously met where the groom was and his bridal party. Um, and then you know, the bride and the groom have their moment, whatever. So, like we just the bridal party got to the side, and it was really good seeing the boys because they were all from high school, but then you know, Milo's like, Oh my god, Casel, like you haven't changed, you're still the same, like bubbly person. And I was just like, for you to say that, dude, like I have not seen you in what 20-something years, 27 years. Yeah, but you've never changed, but like it was such a compliment coming not even from him, I think anyone could give me that compliment, but I guess for somebody that's from my teenage years to now we're in our mid-30s, because we were talking about a few years ago, for him to say that like you're such a bubbly person and you just got that nature about you. Thanks, Milo.

SPEAKER_04 3:14

I'm really dead on the inside, but thanks, mate.

SPEAKER_03 3:17

Like this is true. My children were still quite young and that's usually my internal dialogue most of the time.

SPEAKER_04 3:27

One of the soccer moms, God lover, she sent me a message recently and she's like, Oh Lena, I've just listened to your podcast, and she's like, Look, if you're a type C, like, you know, what am I? Like, I've got no hope. Like, you're killing it, you're definitely a type A. Listen, my friend, I said to her, When I tell you that I mask so well, that is like not even a word of a lie.

SPEAKER_00 3:50

I think it was the question I asked you a few weeks ago. Like, what do you tell? It's a lie you tell yourself. I can do it. I can do it.

SPEAKER_06 3:56

I got this.

SPEAKER_05 3:59

But yeah, I think that was a little segue, but yes, I am generally a bubbly person and a happy person. Yes. But I really don't like people. No, that's a lie. That's a lie.

SPEAKER_04 4:10

That is a lie. So stop, I'll stop you right there. You and my husband walking down the street, going for your walk down the beach, you know, blah, blah, blah. Morning! Morning! Morning! Yeah, lovely day. Me, I'm like, don't fucking talk to me, don't fucking talk to me. I don't avoid eye contact, don't look at them. You like people. Yeah, Sandra.

SPEAKER_05 4:35

I do not like people. You like people. I think that, and that's why I get so bloody tired, is because I'm pretending all the time. Yeah, yeah. But I can't help it. It's just whether it's my sales nature or whatever. I instantly just build like this rapport with people and you know, I ask.

SPEAKER_04 4:54

That's because you make eye contact with them to start with. Like, if you don't do that, you're fine. I'll be like, oh, there's something under your couch. Let me clean that for you. Skirting boards are a bit dirty, let me clean those for you. Whatever time is, I'll do, I'll make coffees, I'll do the drinks, I'll go to Woolies and pick up.

SPEAKER_05 5:10

I disagree, right? And Nakeisha's farewell a few months ago now. I was saying she was like, I don't want to, like, no, no, I'm really phrasing this. I did want to go because I was here for Nakeisha, but I'm like, I don't want to talk. And that's why I hammed it up because of the. So these people, I don't want to talk to like these North Shore mummies and whatever. Like, just I was just not in the mood, right? It was the end of the Christmas period, my social battery was drained. I'm there purely for Nakeisha because I fucking love that girl. Anyway, so to Leno, I was like, I don't I don't want to go, I don't want to go. This one talking to everybody there at the thing. I'm just there like with my face on. I was just the resting bitch face. My resting bitch face, my castle face, just do not talk to me. And I did not give people the time of day. It was the first time I've probably actually never been fake. No, wait, I'm not a fake person. Actually, no, I'm not a fake person. You will know if I don't like you. But you know, I know in certain situations you've just got to be on, and I'm probably always on, but I didn't want to be on that day. And whereas I was extra on. To extra on, you even stayed out to compensate for this both of us.

SPEAKER_04 6:14

No, no, no. Honestly, I'm like, I've got to pick up the pieces here, so it doesn't come as a package. Yes. So you know how they say a married couple is a hundred percent together, but sometimes like one can only give 10, the other one's gonna pick up the 90, and blah blah. That was a perfect example of like this bitch is giving nothing, she's giving a zero, so it's me.

SPEAKER_01 6:33

She's trying to include me and it's like, just leave me alone.

SPEAKER_04 6:36

She's just like, no, I'm not engaging.

SPEAKER_01 6:37

I'm like, okay. So I love your top. What do you do for what?

SPEAKER_05 6:43

Honestly, that is one of my I think my rants, not necessarily people, it's people related. You know what really, really pisses me off? Tell me what pisses you off. Tell me. I dislike it when people seek advice and you dedicate your time and your energy, and then they just don't do anything about it. Or it's not even they're seeking your advice, it's like, oh, I wish I can run a half marathon. Really want to run a half marathon? Well, you know what, Joseph? You can run a half marathon.

SPEAKER_04 7:29

Get off your ass, get into a training regime, and you will run a half marathon. Do they really want to do it or are they just saying that to the channel? Well, that's that's another part.

SPEAKER_05 7:38

So it's kind of like two part, right? Like, I do not want you to pretend to relate to me because I will see through your bullshit. So is this a conversation that's actually happened? Oh, I'm not about a half marathon specifically. Just giving that as an example, or I'm so uh this is my favorite, and I often use this as an analogy when I'm probably describing this kind of situation. Is the fat person crying that they're fat, but they refuse to go to the fucking gym or get into a deficit. Yeah, okay. You know, like you're not helping yourself. I think is that's probably my rant and my gripe. Like it just frustrates me when people don't help themselves. Thank you. You summed it up.

SPEAKER_04 8:17

Yeah, yeah, that's always been a thing of yours. A big bug bear. Yeah, yeah. And that is, and you don't say that with any malice, with any, it's actually gotten me off my ass on so many occasions because look, this is not this is a conversation that's very familiar to you and I. Not a lot of people are built like you. I guess. You just go, you just get up and you're like, you know what? I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna lose this much weight, I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna train for this marathon, I'm gonna save for this whole day. Yeah, but it's it's I'm a doer. You do it, whereas I'm just like, oh, but then I'm like, what would Cass do? So it's gotten me out of situations before because action leads to results, yes, you know, basic. But there's some people just need that little push. Yeah, but then it's like they come to you for a push and you give them that. Do they for advice? Legit. Do have they said how oh, you know what? I'm a fat bitch, how do I lose weight? No, no, no, they've just gone, no, they haven't.

SPEAKER_03 9:17

You've given them the unsolicited advice, my little ethnic, and then when they don't take you up on the advice that they never asked for, you fucking get the shit, and you go, I fucking told her what to do, and she still didn't do it. Not my fault, not my fault. Is that what's happening? No, no, no, another thing. I was talking to um a girlfriend the other day, and there's an extra terminology for this called ask hole.

SPEAKER_05 9:45

An ask hole, like they ask somebody for advice. Okay, so we've got another friend, and I'm sorry, but I'm just gonna say she's she'll she so Karina and Liz, they love bike riding, they're good friends of mine.

SPEAKER_00 9:59

Um, no friends, me that's into that, but yeah.

SPEAKER_05 10:03

No, no, no, and especially Karina, like she won the world champions last year for her age, so she's an absolute machine, and Liz is sensational as well. Then we've got this other friend of ours, right? Zippy, and I'm not saying any bad thing about Zippy, but she wants to go for a bike ride occasionally, and she'll see Karina and Liz go for like this a hundred-kilometer bike ride in the mountains of the south coast that requires a lot of grit, and it's not something you just wake up and you do, but I want to go for a bike ride, and Karina's like, but you can't keep up with us, like yeah, you know, we're in like the elite levels, even Carlos, who you know is not shy of a bit of lyra, he won't ride with the girls because of how fit they are. You know, you have to be at a certain level to ride with them, and she'll say it when she'll see one of their Strava things and be like, I want to go a mode guide with you. But no, you're not practicing. Go and find a group that's within your level, get on your bike and go and ride. And then maybe in two months or three months, you might catch up. Unless you're not in a bad way.

SPEAKER_00 11:08

I've read it. Do it. I'm reading that totally different. I just think zippy just tries to relate. She's just putting it out. That's something I would do.

SPEAKER_03 11:15

I thought that's great.

SPEAKER_00 11:16

That's like oh, I'd love to do that.

SPEAKER_01 11:18

No, I wouldn't.

SPEAKER_05 11:19

No, she's saying she wants to do it. Oh, yeah, okay. And she's trying to go once with Karina, and like she's even gone running with me when I started running, and I'm like, let's go do 10 zippies. Feel you, I'm there with you, Zippy. And she's like, I'll see you back at home. She literally, and I'm just like, mate, I told you I wanted to do 10ks today. This is part of my training, and you're dying on me at one kilometer.

unknown 11:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 11:43

So it's yeah, it's I'm team zippy there.

SPEAKER_04 11:49

I'm just, I love you, zippy but do you know what? Like, this is mine, right? But I'm gonna sound like such a man hater again, and I'm not! I promise I'm not. I promise I'm not, but fuck, you know what? Mine is useless husbands. And I have three specific examples that I've come across recently that I will re-share, reenact, reshare. Is any of them Paul? No, for one. Oh, yeah, no, no, this is just random. Okay, actually, fucking useless excuses for fathers, I should actually say, not husbands, because I don't know their marital status. However, I observed number one, so when Paul and I were away, this was a while ago, for our 10-year anniversary down south, we are waiting for our coffee and we're sitting there in the sun, and this guy walks past, and he's got his shades on, and he's got his fucking Acubra, and he's got both hands in his pockets, just walking like he doesn't have a care in the world, you know, taking in the coasting, just living his best life. And then about three meters behind, there's these two women wrangling children, multiple children in each arm, backpacks, jumpers, drink bottles, and they're related to old mate that's far, far away ahead of them. And she's like, Oh babe, can you take him? Because clearly the woman's struggling, yeah, and he's like, You can't walk. This kid was two, and the road was just there. Yeah. Are you fucking serious?

SPEAKER_03 13:29

So I sat there and I was like, Help, help your kid, mate. Help your missus. And Paul's like, fucking shut up. And I'm like, You love getting involved in a public like. I do, I do, because it's okay. Like, I feel like someone needs to just call them out on this behavior. Like, what the fuck, mate? Anyone that's gonna make a change or not, as long as you're sleeping better at night.

SPEAKER_04 13:51

Well, yeah, like maybe that's my purpose in life is just to, you know, I don't know. But I just like that fucking pissed me off. I'm sorry. Are you for real? Let him walk, let him get run over. Yeah, let's do that instead. That's a bit extreme. Why? Yeah, but what was the alternative? Help your missus.

SPEAKER_05 14:06

Why should I? No, 100%. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, carry at least the jumpers. Mate, do you know what I mean? Yeah, just do something. She's and she she wasn't even being passive about it, which more often than not, husbands would be like, or partners, or whatever your relationship status is. They're like, Oh, you're just being passive. You didn't tell me that you were struggling. She's literally said, Hey, can you grab him for me? So she was quite specific in her ask for help. She was pleased.

SPEAKER_04 14:37

She was not being an asshole. Please take your hands out of your fucking pockets and carry the child that you helped conceive. Maybe she needed to throw a jumper at me because she didn't have enough hands. So that was annoying. And then I nearly died. I nearly died. I took the boys for a haircut last week. And there was this, it was very busy. Just in like a barber. In the barber, just at the local shops. Um, so took, and I just go there because it's convenient. Yep, so I'm waiting, I'm waiting with the boys, and there was this man there waiting with his little child, and he was there for longer than we were. Ample opportunity to plan the haircut or the hairstyle. Okay. So it was there for a good, you know, 20-25 minutes. Then the kid gets in the chair and they put the cape on, and the barber said, What would you like? And he goes, Oh, hang on, let me call, let me call my wife. He had no idea what haircut to give his kids. I was like, You're fucking cracking jokes. So he put the phone on speaker and she's explaining to the barber. Probably doesn't even understand English, she like, yeah, pretty much, like what she wants. And I was like, You are joking me. Like, you could not in that fucking 25 minutes that you were sitting there waiting, like you could not say, Hey babe, what do you want little Johnny to do with his hair? Do you have a photo of little Johnny from when he you like it? Like six weeks ago, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, what the fuck? What the fuck?

SPEAKER_03 16:06

That is us.

SPEAKER_02 16:08

Seriously, you're the don't don't annoy me with questions about the chore that you should be doing. Like when you're at Woolies, oh babe, what bread give you? You know what fucking bread we eat. We eat it all every fucking week.

SPEAKER_05 16:21

Really? Yeah, I think with the haircut situation, Carl has taken it's generally his job. Well, not his job, he just offers to take the boys for their haircuts. And the boys will often come back with a haircut that I'll be like, what is going on? What is this? He's like, Well, you fucking take the next time.

SPEAKER_04 16:43

Yeah, well, I mean very specific instructions.

SPEAKER_05 16:47

But do I need to leave specific instructions? Like, you see what our children come home with from four to six weeks prior, and Phoenix is very vocal. He wants a mullet. Yeah, that is not a mullet. Yeah. Like, and I always said I would never give my kids a mullet, but Phoenix, it just suits it does suit him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or I'll never forget when Xander when he was a baby. He had the cutest long blonde hair, Xander, and it was just so cute. And eventually, like my sister gave him his first haircut, she's a um hairdresser, and it was cute, and it was still like long and boyish and stuff. And then it was around the time when it was around Christmas time that Carl took him for a haircut. Husky says when you were pregnant with James.

SPEAKER_03 17:30

When it was really short, came back. Did you cry? I've never wanted to do four Sunday. That's what my DJ.

SPEAKER_05 17:41

I was like, what is gone with my baby? His end up was not even two. And he looked like it was a buzz cut. It was a buzzcut. But it's hair, it grows back. I mean it does, but I just feel like it's that was that was the end of his hair. Yeah, his little cute baby. Because it's not the same again. No, it's never grown back, correct? And the little buchlers, and now he just looks like dumb and dumber, like this finish. Same with my voice.

SPEAKER_04 18:08

But I actually don't give two shits about their haircuts, to be honest. I know I agree.

SPEAKER_05 18:12

Do I care? I don't know, maybe it's the vanity in me. Like, but I'm like, yeah, no, Carl should know. So you know what? I partially useless because he probably had half an hour to prepare. So don't call your wife as your child is in the chair. Like, he's already been waiting for what half an hour. The child is restless. Prepare, mate. So that part, yes, but also Oh, it just blew my mind.

SPEAKER_04 18:34

I was just like, like, I've either trained pool that well, like, or he's got his own brain, like, but I'm just like, that is just that wouldn't fly. And I was just actually speechless. I was like, what are my eyeballs watching right now? Yeah. Yeah. Also, the soccer dads. I don't even want to call them soccer dads because they don't do anything. Like, why is it always the mums that ask when's the time's the game on and who's bringing the oranges? And who's doing the oranges? It's gonna be one team does, one team doesn't, one of the boys' teams do, the other doesn't. But just like, where are the fucking dads? Yeah, it's also they're not coaching. Well, Paul coaches one team, but like they're not putting their hand up to if Paul's working or we're away or whatever. To it's always a fucking mum that's doing it. Yeah. But they come to the game and they sit there fucking watching and putting their two cents worth in.

SPEAKER_05 19:32

Well, do you find them around aggressive?

SPEAKER_04 19:34

No, oh I'm maybe they need to be a bit more aggressive.

SPEAKER_05 19:37

Oh, I'm like, calm down, they're eight-year-olds. Yeah. Well, just say to them, you know what, you come and do it because you coach your team. That no, no, no, I'm not no, no, this was me watching Xander's soccer team yesterday, the undernines, but there was a couple of fathers on the sidelines. I was like, mate, come down. Your kids want Ronaldo. Also, like they're under nines, like, I mean, but then I also caught myself going, fucking Xander, you stupid pussy. But these fathers were being really aggressive and loud, and I was just like, calm, calm your farm.

SPEAKER_04 20:06

It's putting pressure on extra pressure on the kids, isn't it? Yes. But yeah, I don't know. I just my that's my rant.

SPEAKER_05 20:12

I know I get it, because yes, I think for me being a coach, and this has pissed me off, is we had Phoenix's soccer team this year, under sevens, and the old coach left because his daughter got put into a girls' team, so whatever, and he's also doing the under-nines. So we were short shorter coach. It's like I'm one of the only full-time working mums in this team, right? Of there's five boys as husbands as well. Carl can definitely not do it, he travels a lot, so I would not have expected him to even volunteer for anything within this. It's like who can be the coach? Who can be the coach? Who can be the coach? No one crickets, crickets, crickets. Like, Cassie, you do it. I'm like, nah, man, like I'm working full-time, I work up in Sydney. You know, Saturdays is fine for me to be there. I'm happy to help out on a Saturday morning, but I can't commit to being there every week to train because it happens when you make eye contact with people, they're like, You're the fit one, Cassie. You can do it. Anyways, I'm now the coach, and it's it's fun, don't get me wrong, and I'm really enjoying it. But I didn't like the process, the fact that you know, useless husbands out there, nobody else wanted to volunteer.

SPEAKER_04 21:22

No, but I guarantee you they'll be the first ones to fucking run their mouth behind your back on what I'm not doing right. You could be doing better or if they were coaching what you should be working on with the boy too.

SPEAKER_05 21:34

Fucking up you get, mate. Like also they're like seven years old. I'm not just making them do star jumps. I stopped said jar jumps because I'm like, boys, I'm gonna pee my pants. Yeah. So you continue doing star jumps. Do they listen to you? Yeah, they do actually. And Phoenix is like, Mommy, you're gonna be my coach. Yes. Um, yesterday morning, Sabin's like, Mommy, you're gonna be the coach today. I was like, Yes. But then there's other coaches also I don't really know anything about soccer, so I'll just add that into the mix. The first game, the other game team that we were competing against. The coach. Like obviously, I knew what you know, if they kick the ball out, it goes to the other team. It depends on who last touched the ball to the ball.

SPEAKER_04 22:09

Touched the ball theory, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 22:11

Well, yeah, either way. So, you know, you touch you kick it out, then it's our team to play, right?

SPEAKER_04 22:16

Well, at this age, they don't have the like the penalties and stuff.

SPEAKER_05 22:20

I don't know what that is, anyways. Yeah, there was this this this other coach and this other team kept them because I was like, oh, white's ball, red's ball, and he's like, corners, no corners.

SPEAKER_04 22:31

And I was like, I'm saying no corners. Yeah, because there's no corners in that's right. At this age, there's no corners. Yeah. He's doing it all tight.

SPEAKER_05 22:40

And I went up to the manager of my team. I was like, listen, this fucking coach out there is saying no corners. What the fuck is no corners? No corner? She's like, I don't know that is. So none of us knew. Then throughout the Don't you go to coaching school? No. There's his WhatsApp group created for under six and seventh coaches and managers team. So of course I'm in there. And this same guy. No corners, Mr. No Corners.

SPEAKER_01 23:06

What the rules? Yeah. You know what?

SPEAKER_05 23:10

He happened to be the same. We're competing. Anyways, it's a shitty story, but anyways, he happened to be the same coach yesterday. So God, did you get the WhatsApp message on the rules? Did you say no corners? Yes, I I'm well aware of what no corners are now. Thank you. Thank you so much for my gosh. Um, so yeah, that is a useless soccer dad's husband. I completely agree with you. Different sort of situation, but they can all go in EAD. Yeah, that is my thing. Hey, so did you see that um article? It was written by um by Mama Mia and Annalise Todd. I don't know, I'll share the link. And it I guess it got me thinking where she wrote an article on the no reply friend.

SPEAKER_04 23:53

Oh, about me? Did she write it about me? The one that reads your message and doesn't reply? Or no? Oh, because that's me.

SPEAKER_05 24:00

I've got to run away myself.

SPEAKER_03 24:02

What did I wrong with the no reply friend?

SPEAKER_04 24:07

The reply only friend in your life. Right. I think I know where you're going with this. Yeah. So I guess so someone who will only respond if you doesn't make an effort, correct? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Have you seen the article? No. I don't know. I thought very excited when you thought I've seen articles about people not replying to text messages. That's from my T. Oh, you do reply to mine to the effect. I have to now because we're business partners.

SPEAKER_05 24:32

Um magnitude of chat options. I think, you know, Walt, we're in our 40s, and this article really struck a chord with me because it was talking to the friend, the reply-only friend. And it was essentially those friends in your life that just don't give back, that don't make the effort at all. And you are the one that is constantly trying to be like, okay, let's catch up. Or hey, how are you? What's going on? When are we going to see each other? Or, you know, I'm doing this on this date. Would you like to come? So it's always, you know, me initiating. Initiating contact, initiating, get togetherness. And this article really struck a chord that there are clearly other women or men out there that have people like this in their life, and it's really fucking pissing me off. It's really hurtful because I'm like, you know what? Like, you clearly don't validate my friendship like I validate yours, and we're all busy. We're all busy, so I'm not going to use that as an excuse. And we've all got our phones in our hands. We've got our phones in our hands, probably way more than what we should have, our phones in our hands. And if we don't have our phones in our hands, we've got our AirPods that tell you new text message from Lena. Yeah. Or new Instagram post from Lena. Or the car, Apple car places, new text message from Lena. So you are constantly surrounded by technology that tells you when a person reaches out to you. Unless you've disabled those notifications.

SPEAKER_04 26:04

Do apples do that? No, look, I get what you're saying. I get it, I get it. I get it. I think in our, you know, late 30s, early 40s, you don't have as much time as what you used to. So I've think for me, I've got certain friends that we've built little traditions on, similar to Friendsness, where I will only see those people. Like, yes, I love them. Yes, I, you know, I care about them. I care about their children. I make an effort to see them, but we've built little traditions just around our Christmas catch-ups or our you know, certain catch-ups. It's not something that if I see them anytime outside of that, it's a bonus and it's great. But I I don't know. I have a lot of people in my life, and I there's I just like physically, there's not enough hours in the day for me to be able to.

SPEAKER_05 27:06

But did the other people are they reaching out and saying, hey, we've got our Christmas catching up coming soon? It's Christmas coming up, Lena. Are we doing what are we doing this year? The last few years we've gone to the pub, or the last few years I've come to your house. You know, let's just lock that in.

SPEAKER_04 27:18

Yeah, some do, some don't. But also, like I've got a lot of bloody type B friends as well, so I I personally don't take it personally.

SPEAKER_05 27:26

Yeah, okay. I don't know, I do.

SPEAKER_04 27:28

That's just me. You, yeah, yeah, you do.

SPEAKER_05 27:29

I think for me, it's like it's a it's a two-way street, right? 100%. All friendships are two-way streets. It's two-way street, and I feel like, yeah, that that I don't know that article really struck a chord with me.

SPEAKER_04 27:40

Speaking of articles, I'm just gonna play devil's advocate. I listened to something the other day, and it was I don't know who, just you know how something comes up on your socials, and it was someone saying that she hosts, and she goes, I've hosted so many events, and I've never got an invitation back. Yeah, I've never had anyone say, 'I want to return the favour.' I've invited the same people over and over again, they've all had a great time. I've gone like you know, above and beyond for them, and they haven't returned the favour. And then someone said something to her which changed her perspective, and it was yeah, but that person will mind your kids at the drop of the hat, and that person will do something else for you, and that person will do something. So people's value or people's worth might not be the same to you, like it doesn't have to be like like for like.

SPEAKER_05 28:35

No, it's not about like for like, but then that to me only indicates that they're only there for the bad, they're there for the emergency.

SPEAKER_04 28:41

Yeah, I get that. Yeah, I don't know. I like I just don't take offense to that, but I think that sometimes I could be the person that doesn't reach out. Not on purpose. No, and it just because I'm purely an airhead. The amount of times that it pops into my brain, fuck, I've got to message that person. Because they're not part of your subconscious, so that means they're not important. Well, no, that's not true. I've gone, I've I haven't replied to my mum, my husband, you sometimes doesn't mean that you're not important. I'm just like, I'm an airhead.

SPEAKER_05 29:10

Yeah, but then we'll just send an Uber Eats your daughter, that's Nikisha's a BT.

SPEAKER_03 29:15

Are you there?

SPEAKER_05 29:15

No, I I don't no, I don't know. You're not buying it, not buying it. Yeah, I just feel like it's just not that into you.

SPEAKER_04 29:23

Yeah, okay. I don't know, the artist what do you do with these friendships then? Do you just like snip snip?

SPEAKER_05 29:28

Yeah, I I think yeah, you just start sizzling out, like you start pulling back and be like, okay, well, we'll see where this goes. Yeah, and see if they reach out to you. Correct, yeah, yeah. Yeah, see how long it takes. Wow, we've really had a good good little chat.

SPEAKER_03 29:43

Good little chat, I love that. Let's just us. That's just normal. That's us.

SPEAKER_05 29:48

I'm gonna ask you a question. What is your most irrational fear that you would not be reasoning with? That I would not be reasoning with. People are like, nah, I don't give a shit what you say. I'm gonna be petrified of that. Do you have a fear?

SPEAKER_04 30:02

I've got a fear, it's not irrational though.

SPEAKER_05 30:04

What is it?

SPEAKER_04 30:06

I might cry. Like, it's not stupid, like a spider or a cockroach or anything. Yeah, it's like my biggest fear is my husband dying young.

SPEAKER_05 30:13

Yeah, okay.

SPEAKER_04 30:15

Like, yeah, it's gonna fucking fear me. Like, I've just always yeah, I've just always had this fear. I don't even want to talk about it because it will it'll put it out into the universe. And I am a bit woo like that, quite superstitious.

SPEAKER_05 30:27

But yeah, you burn some sage after this is fine.

SPEAKER_04 30:30

Yeah, so no, that's yeah, my biggest fear is something happening to Paul.

SPEAKER_05 30:33

Yeah, okay.

SPEAKER_04 30:34

Don't leave me alone with these kids, you asshole. Where they're ours together.

SPEAKER_05 30:42

Don't do it. Yeah, see, I've always said I want to die before Carl. Yeah. Because I don't want to live without him. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 30:47

Even though like it's like it's like I it's like it takes the fear takes over me physically. Really? I can't, yeah, it makes me uncomfortable, I can't breathe. Yeah, yeah, it's like a physical, like my connection with him has always been like physical. I've known bad shit is gonna happen to him before it's actually happened.

SPEAKER_05 31:06

You are a bit wonderful.

SPEAKER_04 31:06

And I'm like, I fucking told you. Yeah, you shouldn't have done that.

SPEAKER_05 31:09

You born on a Saturday, I'd say so lovely.

SPEAKER_04 31:16

As is James and as is Paul.

SPEAKER_05 31:18

Yeah, okay. So it's like we need prophecies.

SPEAKER_04 31:20

Oh, actually, and Thomas, we all are. Oh wow, yeah, and Thomas is woo-woo as well. He's got he's got an amazing sixth sense. I trust my six-year-old child so much. Yeah, if he tells me he doesn't want to go somewhere, doesn't want to, doesn't like I'll listen to him.

SPEAKER_05 31:35

You listen to him. Yeah, wow. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 31:39

Interesting. All right, unhinged question time for you. It's actually not even that unhinged, but you know how you don't speak like proper English sometimes with a makeup word.

SPEAKER_00 31:51

If there is one word that you could officially add to the Oxford English dictionary, what would it be?

SPEAKER_05 32:01

I don't know. I feel like you would be the best somebody to answer that because I don't even know half the times what I say all the time. Um, I solution solver. So we're replacing problem solver with solution solver. Solution solver, 100%. It makes far more sense in my brain than problem solver does. I'm a solution solver. Stopping an asshole, I will be a solution solver to you.

SPEAKER_03 32:23

For the ass hole full circle. See, I give my unsolicited advice because I'm a solution solver. You don't have black zippy. Come on, run a kilometer over a period of 10 weeks. You can catch up to my 10 days. You'll be running, and zippy will be on a bike. You'll be the bike, the person that annoys you.

SPEAKER_01 32:47

Correct?

SPEAKER_03 32:49

On that note, thank you, everybody, so much for another episode of I think for dreams.

SPEAKER_05 32:54

Thanks for joining. Talk to you next week. Like and subscribe.

SPEAKER_00 32:57

Remember, please, the end of every episode, we just beg.

SPEAKER_03 33:00

Beg, bang, bang, bye. Okay, bye.