10 Misconceptions About Cuckolding That Need to Die

Everyone seems to have an opinion about cuckolding—but how many of those opinions are actually true?

In this episode of The Cuckold Marriage Podcast, Chris and Cuckoldress Lexie Meadows tackle ten of the biggest misconceptions they hear about the lifestyle. From the belief that the husband must be weak or unable to satisfy his wife, to the idea that it's simply "cheating with permission," they separate myth from reality through honest conversation and their own lived experience. Along the way, they discuss communication, trust, consent, jealousy, boundaries, emotional intimacy, and why every couple's journey is unique.

Whether you're simply curious, exploring the lifestyle for yourself, or have been living it for years, this episode offers a thoughtful look at what cuckolding is—and what it isn't. Join us as we challenge assumptions, answer common questions, and share the lessons we've learned from navigating this dynamic together.

Lexie's Page & Coaching Services: www.CuckoldressLexie.com 

Email Us: Podcast@CuckoldressLexie.com 

Transcript

SPEAKER_05 0:05

Hello my naughty friends. I'm cupcultrist Lexi Meadows and welcome back to the Cup Cult Marriage Podcast. If you've ever been told that cupculting means the husband is weak, that the wife doesn't really love him, or that this is nothing more than cheating, then pull up a chair because today's episode is for you. The truth is there are a lot of opinions about this dynamic, but very few people are hearing from couples who actually live it every day. So today, Chris and I are gonna be talking, we're gonna be taking on the 10 biggest misconceptions that we hear from friends, social media, even people who are a little curious about what happens behind closed doors. Some myths might surprise you, but uh, and some might challenge you and everything that you thought you knew about this. Whether you're here because you're curious, skeptical, or you've been on this journey for years, we hope that you'll listen with an open mind. Because the truth is usually a lot more interesting than the rumors. So get comfortable, keep an open mind, and who knows, you may just leave this episode seeing cuckolding in a whole new light. Let's separate fantasy from reality. But before we jump in, I do just have a few quick housekeeping items. First of all, thank you so much for making the cuckold marriage podcast part of your week. Whether you've been with us since the first episode or just joining us today, we so appreciate you being here. Um, if you're enjoying the show, the best way you can support us is by following or subscribing, um, leaving us a five-star review, and sharing the podcast with someone you think might benefit from it. We also love hearing from you guys. So please send us your questions, your stories, your ideas through fan mail. And um, there's a good chance that we'll even feature your question in an episode. If you're looking for more of us between episodes, be sure to visit CutColdress Lexi.com. And there you'll find coaching information, links to all of our content, and ways to connect with our amazing community. Now, enough for the housekeeping. Chris, are you ready to bust some myths?

SPEAKER_00 2:02

I am so ready to bust some mix some miss Lexi. This episode has been on our list for a long time of things to do because we hear these misconceptions over and over again. And some come from people who are genuinely curious. You hear them on some of our on our fan mail, some come from social media, some come from people who have never spoken to a real couple living this dynamic. So they're just maybe getting all their information from the internet or forums or cut porn or that kind of stuff. So today we're going to walk through 10 of the biggest myths that we hear and explain how we've experienced them in our own personal marriage. Now remember, every relationship is different. We're sharing our own personal experience and perspectives, not speaking for every couple. Before we get started, though, why don't you give a little quick shout out to one of your fans, Lexi? One of your cucks, um, who's part of what you call your Velvet Rope Society, right? On your fansly. So um, this uh this guy was nice enough not only to take good care of you, but he actually got me a gift. What a nice cuck.

SPEAKER_05 3:09

So nice.

SPEAKER_00 3:10

Thank you so much for thinking of me here. Um I've had my my eye on this pair of shoes that I'm gonna use uh and that that uh that gift for. So thank you. We really appreciate you.

SPEAKER_03 3:19

Yes, we do.

SPEAKER_00 3:20

And everybody who really supports Lexi and everything that we do. So let's get into the episode now. So the first myth, so we're gonna break down 10 different myths, and so I'll kind of tee them up for us, and then we can both talk about them. So the first myth I want to break and and bust is that the husband is weak. So, Lexi, kind of when you hear that off the off the bat, the husband is weak. What does that make you think, you know, in terms of this this dynamic?

SPEAKER_05 3:47

It makes me think that the people who think that are men with a bit of toxic masculinity that um rather than understanding anything, they just look down and just want to put people down. Um if you know, it's fine if you want to do absolutely no research whatsoever on a dynamic or a lifestyle. But if you don't want to do any research, then just keep your mouth shut. Like we don't want to hear it. Um so the people that that think this way have like they're just honestly typically clueless about it because there is no greater strength than submitting and giving up control to someone else. Like you can't you can't be weak and do that. Um, you know, we've talked about this before. Like it's it's just impossible.

SPEAKER_00 4:38

Yeah, and you know, one thing that that that that I've been asked is do we ever worry about what other people would think, you know, in terms of the of the husband being weak? And I mean, honestly, yes. I mean, how could you not? You know, we're human beings, we're not robots. So I mean, those kind of things do cross my mind is you know, people are gonna think I'm weak. It's just it's just not so far from the truth. It's just it's just like patently false. Um, so yeah, I think that's one of the biggest misconceptions is that is that and and not only that, but like the data that you see with all your coaching, like shows that, right? Because most of the guys you work with who identify as cucks are in like power power jobs and stuff.

SPEAKER_05 5:19

They really are. Like it's it's so it's more common than not. They're they're in charge of everything. They're they're high up there, they have a lot of responsibility, they have a lot of people underneath them. All they do all day is exercise control and make decisions. And so, you know, these men are not weak. They're they're strong. And um, you know, I think that a lot of the men that would say, though they must be weak, aren't strong enough to do this. They wouldn't be strong enough to give up control like that because it takes strength to do it.

SPEAKER_00 5:51

Right. So the next myth that we have is that the wife doesn't love her husband. So you wanna you wanna try to bust that myth, Lexi? Do you not love me anymore?

SPEAKER_05 6:02

Um, so yeah, that's that's a bunch, a bunch of uh BS. Um, love and exclusivity are not always the same thing. You can love someone with your your whole heart and still have sex with other people. Yeah, I mean, it's it's sex. They're not mutually exclusive. Um, it doesn't mean that I have the same relationship with a bull that I do with my husband. Um, you know, the the marriage and the relationship that I have with my husband is the foundation of everything. And, you know, I could give this up tomorrow and not have any more bulls ever again, and I'd still be okay because I have my husband. Um, you know, there's we have emotional intimacy and that's what keeps us going strong. Um, who I sleep with has nothing to do with that.

SPEAKER_00 6:47

So what do we do kind of to protect our marriage, do you think? You know, especially in this kind of dynamic, which can be a I I I I think I think the communication is the number one thing you do to protect our marriage, don't you think?

SPEAKER_05 6:59

Absolutely. Honesty, openness, communication. Like we we know what each other is thinking about everything.

SPEAKER_00 7:07

Right. And I think that that's that's the critical piece of the of the dynamic is just having that open dialogue. I I think that um I think that solves for protecting a lot of stuff. If you can, if you can be honest with your partner about how you're feeling, about we probably share more with each other than the average married couple, would be my would be my guess. Uh is is that is is that just the level of emotions we share with each other and all that stuff. And and the marriage remains our foundation.

SPEAKER_05 7:37

Yeah, but I also think that this dynamic has helped facilitate that. I think that if we weren't doing this lifestyle, maybe we wouldn't be as open and communicative with each other as we are and have to be in order to um to do this.

SPEAKER_00 7:53

Yeah, I think so. And I think a part of it is, you know, this lifestyle has a lot of uh how can I put this mildly, honey? It has a lot of lot of kinky shit that goes with it, right? And so a lot of um, a lot of times when you have those kind of um those kind of ideas or those kind of fantasies or whatever, a lot of times those needs go unmet simply because one of the partners just doesn't want to talk about it. It's they're just too embarrassed or they don't know how to bring it up or or whatever it is. And it may not even be a sexual topic. It may just be something that is just there on the surface, that underneath the surface that nobody wants to bring up. We bring those things up. And I think that makes us a stronger couple.

SPEAKER_05 8:35

Yeah, this relationship, you know, it does um create uh the possibility for a lot of little landmines here and there. And if you're not being really open about everything right when it's happening and talking about everything honestly, um, you might step on one of those. And so we avoid them entirely by being so open and honest about things.

SPEAKER_00 8:56

Yeah. And I think that's a that's a critical thing in terms of um anytime you're you're you're within any kind of different kind of relationship dynamic is um addressing issues as they come. So don't sit on issues because that can create resentment. And in this dynamic, that resentment can can come out pretty hard if you don't um if you don't let it out and and really don't share those thoughts.

SPEAKER_05 9:18

Yeah. And I guess I shouldn't say that we avoid the landmines altogether, because that's not entirely true. You know, we we tackle um our share of instances where maybe things aren't perfect. Um and but we we handle it um, you know, as best we can. And we couldn't do that successfully if we weren't so open.

SPEAKER_00 9:38

Yeah, completely agree.

SPEAKER_05 9:40

Next one myth number three the dynamic is purely in the bedroom.

SPEAKER_00 9:45

Yeah, that's complete bullshit. The bedroom is actually probably the like it's the smallest part of what this dynamic is, at least for us. Do you agree with that, honey?

SPEAKER_05 9:58

Yeah, absolutely. I mean, we we there's so much that goes into the the dynamic, you know, there's there's teasing that goes on long before anything happens in the bedroom, long after anything has happened in the bedroom. Um there's aftercare, there's um there's just so much. Um there's a lot of people do a lot of role play and and things like that in addition. Um I I don't think that you can I mean some people do, excuse me, they do relegate this solely to the bedroom, and that's fine. If that works for them and they only want this to be a bedroom thing, that's fine. But that's not how we live it. We live it outside of the bedroom as well, um, because it's fun. And I find pleasure in just randomly teasing Chris and making his jaw go slack.

SPEAKER_00 10:52

That's the best part. And it really is. I mean, if you if you ask the question like how much time do we spend talking versus actually playing, it's like a 90-10 split. I mean, do you think that? I mean, it's yeah, something like that. The vast, vast, vast majority is us just with each other playing within this dynamic and and having that fun. I I mean, 10% of the time it is involving the the actual bedroom activities, but that's not the foundation of it.

SPEAKER_05 11:19

That's what's really between you and the bulls, it's probably a little more than 10%. Yeah, well, I get it. I mean, don't forget, I'm having more sex than you are.

SPEAKER_00 11:27

That is true. You're having a lot more sex than me. But um I I meant when it's just us. Oh, okay. Yeah, when there's nobody else, it's like a 90-10 split. Like most of the time, it's just us.

SPEAKER_05 11:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 11:38

Yeah. So the next the next myth that we need to bust is that every cuckold husband secretly hates this. I I don't think so. The number of guys who actually reach out to you. Here's here's one thing though that I find interesting is we've gotten several guys who have reached out, and I think we need to do a whole episode on this one, but several guys who have reached out and said, This fantasy started after I got cheated on. Um, I think that's a whole separate topic that we need to like table for for the next one. For another discussion. But yeah, I think we can discuss a little bit about that. But I think that's like deserves a whole episode of of how this, how this fetish can come after you get cheated on and and and all that kind of stuff. But no, I don't think that husbands secretly hate it. I I mean, having jealousy is normal. Uh do I get jealous when you're with somebody else? Hell yes. Like, really jealous. But like that's part of the fun. Like the mix of emotions are normal. Um, the excitement and anxiety, they happen at the same time. They exist at the same time. And this is where, this is where we actually need a lot from, you know, the from the hot wife, from the cuck holderess, because like you've almost got to have this like spidey sense of when it's almost like getting too much for us. And um like helping us process those emotions is are like totally healthy because all those like emotions do still happen. But that doesn't mean that that doesn't mean that I don't enjoy this ride. Like I asked for this ride. And you just said a few minutes ago, if we wanted the ride to end, like it could end. But it's it's fun. Um, you know, have I struggled at times? Like, sure, I've struggled at times, but I think any relationship dynamic, you you might struggle. But sure, of course I've of course I've struggled at times with this, but then we reconnect and it's like so much better. Um, normally the struggle happens like while it's happening. When you're already home, like that's like when the struggle kind of ends, if that makes sense. Is that does that make sense? Uh does my ramblings make sense?

SPEAKER_05 13:45

Yes, yes, makes sense. You got it.

SPEAKER_00 13:48

So then the next uh the next kind of myth is that the bull is actually stealing the wife. What are your thoughts on that one, honey?

SPEAKER_05 13:56

So, like, I know that this is a possibility, but I don't think it's the norm. Um, and I think we're gonna talk more about this um toward the end, but you know, the bull a lot of times well, different people have different relationships. So, you know, a lot of couples have rules and boundaries, which and this is one of the ways, one of the many ways that boundaries come into play and they're very important. Um, because lots of couples have rules that say you're not allowed to get, you know, emotionally attached to the bull, which we talked about before. There there needs to be some give and take with that because there's it's pretty hard to have sex with someone, especially repeatedly, without developing some feelings, you know, but it's very different from like love feelings, butterflies, things like that. Those are very different feelings. So a lot of um couples will have a rule like no butterflies, no no falling in love with the bull and everything. And then there are other couples that are like, Oh, I I I want you, honey, to have a deep relationship with a bull, you know. I mean, that'd be great. I'd love to see that. And um either way is fine if it works for you and your partner, but I I don't feel that a bull can just steal a wife away based on sex. You know, I mean, I hate to I hate to break it to you guys, but we require more than that. Um, we we need so much more in our relationship, and a guy could fuck us upside down every which way from Sunday, be the best sex of our life, leave us just in a trembling mess. And our thought is not, gee, I need to run away with this guy so I can continue having this sex. Um, you know, there's just that's just it's not enough. Like having a well-working dick is not enough. So the the marriage is still, you know, if your foundation is strong, if your relationship is strong, then this should not be a problem. Um if this is your relationship's last dying gasp, then maybe that's not this is not a good idea to enter into the relationship if things are already so far on the rocks. But I think if you have a healthy, um respectful relationship and you love your partner, um you know, I don't think that this is a big risk, especially if you're open and honest, talk about things as they come, and sometimes maybe you need those boundaries.

SPEAKER_00 16:39

Yeah. And I um I I'm kind of laughing as you were saying some of this because I mean, just the other night you met a guy and you you you you had a bull and and you showed me a text message you had sent to him that where you were giving him your your your your number and you said, This is Lexi, I like you. And and so like what that told me is like, I mean, I wasn't there. What that told me was at that moment you were like having feelings for this guy. So um I was making googly eyes. I don't I don't know, like I don't think I had real feelings, but that's But I mean, I like you is not I wanna fuck you.

SPEAKER_05 17:16

Um like I didn't know what else to say. Like I would I feel like I needed to say something when I was like texting you my numbers, so I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 17:22

But any either way, like I know making googly eyes or whatever, like that's going to freaking happen. Like it is what it is. And I think that if you are part of like a a poly relationship, like that's just to be expected, is that you're gonna have feelings for multiple people. So it may be different within the context of this. And so, and you can be multiple things. Um, you you might have a cuck holding dynamic where where Polly is okay, where like like I'm okay with Lexi forming some semblance of feelings with guys. Like, I I just I don't feel threatened. I don't see another guy as a competition. I just I don't think that you're going to leave. Um, and you know, I said this on one episode. I I I I just I hope you always find a guy that fills gaps that I don't have. Like I was I was talking about like snorkeling and that kind of stuff. Like I don't, like I don't like that stuff. Like I'm not an outdoorsy person. I don't so when I think about, you know, what I what I hope for for you when you when you find another guy, it's stuff that is, you know, a guy who's almost a little bit opposite than me in in ways that that would be fun for you and where you would get to enjoy just just kind of a little bit of variety. Does that make sense? But I don't see that as competition at all. I think I guess if there was a bull who was kind of a dickhead, I might. So I would have a real problem if you were with a guy who was actually kind of a dick versus like outside of the dynamic. Like when you're in the dynamic, fine, there's teasing or whatever and that kind of stuff. But if they were like actually a jerk to me, not nice to me, not wanting to talk to me, I think that would be a bigger issue for me. What do you think?

SPEAKER_05 18:53

I would never, ever be with a bull that treated you badly. Like, I don't care what his qualities are, that's an automatic no.

SPEAKER_00 19:04

Yeah, I can't see that either. And so every every guy that you've been with that I've actually met has been like super cool with me. And like I'm super cool with them, and I just I just like don't have an issue. Like we're just we're just cool. Um, so anyway, so that's why I don't feel it's rhythm. So I that the bull is not gonna steal the wife if you actually have a good foundation of your marriage, your your wife's not going anywhere.

SPEAKER_05 19:31

So you've been thinking about it. But turning fantasy into reality takes more than curiosity, it takes direction. I work with couples and individuals to guide you through the conversations and dynamics that make a cuck holding relationship actually work. Those first conversations and introductions to your fantasy are especially critical. Done right, it changes everything. Done wrong, it can break it. If you're ready to do it the right way, book time with me at cuckholderslexie.com. Next one, number six, is that it's just basically cheating. That's a myth. Um, in fact, it's it's the opposite. I mean, cheating involves deception. It's intentional deception and going behind your partner's back and doing something that you know that they would not approve of. Um this is the opposite of that. You know, this is openly talking to your partner about it, both of you being on the same page and agreeing fully. No one's being manipulated, um, no one's being pushed into it um or guilted into it or anything like that. You're you're both um, you know, eyes wide open, aware of what's going on, fan of it, on the same page. Um, but this this dynamic, I mean, it thrives on transparency. And so it's it's very much um nothing like cheating, in my opinion. Um what do you think?

SPEAKER_00 21:07

Yeah, I could I could I couldn't think of anything that could be more opposite than this and cheating. I mean, cheating would would that that would actually be really hard to take. I could see how somebody could get cheated on and maybe they morph it into this as as a as a coping mechanism.

SPEAKER_05 21:23

And it's actually extremely common.

SPEAKER_00 21:25

Right. It's extremely common. But I mean, what what Lexi and I do is like I don't consider it cheating at all. I mean, you you you communicate to me, I know exactly what's gonna happen. I know if you go out for a night, there's a damn good chance you're gonna end up with somebody. And like I'm okay with like, I mean, you have you have the hall pass. So it's it's not it's not cheating. Like I just it's just us having fun. And um yeah, I I I don't think it's I don't think it's I don't think it's that at all.

SPEAKER_05 21:53

Yeah, and I mean, even like, you know, I don't have to some some couples have different rules. I mean, we all have different rules. So some couples have the rule that it must be talked about with the Husband or partner beforehand. Otherwise, it's cheating. And that's fine if they both agree to that and that's what they'd want to set their parameters as and define it as. But like, you know, in the example of the other night, um you know, I didn't know for sure what was going to happen that night. And um had I, you know, had sex with a bull like I did, and then just not told Chris and said, oh no, nothing happened. That's cheating.

SPEAKER_03 22:31

Right.

SPEAKER_05 22:31

You know, um, so you know, I don't have to have permission beforehand. It's already given. Um, it's already implied from Chris, but um, you know, he is always, you know, kept in the no. Um, and and we always talk about it, and I I tell him everything. So again, transparency.

SPEAKER_00 22:53

Yeah, we don't like we don't keep anything from each other. Like, I I can't imagine lying to you about the smallest thing. Um, and I think that's what makes our relationship great. So the next myth, um, the husband can't satisfy his wife. I I mean, it's not true in all situations, but in but in some it might be. And in some, the the cuck actually gets off on that, like actually likes that. Like that's part of the fantasy, that's part of the fetishes. I can't satisfy my wife. So, you know, a bull, a bigger, stronger bull is gonna do it. If that's part of your kink, then like, you know, good. Like, but but if it's not part of your kink, like it's not part of ours. Like, I know I can satisfy you-ish. Maybe not to the length of time you need. That's what toys are for, honey. That's what toys are for, exactly. That's why, guys, use it, make sure she reaches the goalpost before you even get on the field. That's my that's my theory. But yeah, I don't know. I mean, what are your thoughts on this myth that the husband can't satisfy his wife?

SPEAKER_05 23:59

Well, I think you you hit the nail on the head. Like for some in some cases, that is true. It might be, you know. Um, but that's, you know, and that can lead to part of the fetish. But that's not true in all situations. Um, you know, there are plenty, some some couples are pussy free, um, PIV free, um, and some are very much not. And the the ones that are not, maybe she's satisfied, maybe she isn't. But it's not nothing is the same for everybody. Everyone's different. And it shouldn't just be assumed that because a couple is leading a cuckled lifestyle, that he's not capable of pleasing her and satisfying her in bed. Because that that's a you know, major assumption. Um and you know, novelty and love can coexist. Um, you know, I'm satisfied with Chris, but I also enjoy variety. And I I enjoy um, you know, newness sometimes. And so this allows me to scratch that itch um and still, you know, be fine and and have sex with Chris as well.

SPEAKER_00 25:12

And I love that for you. I love that you get to scratch that itch and have the variety and all that stuff. And I mean, it just it's not like that for me. Like I don't, like I just, I just want you. Um, I don't want variety. Oh but that's that's what this di in in my mind, that's what this kind of dynamic is, is um I just I I just don't have the need for that variety. I don't want it. Um, but I like that you get it.

SPEAKER_05 25:39

It's good, because I will Lorraine bobbit your ass.

SPEAKER_00 25:41

I mean, like we we won't have to worry about you doing that because I'm good just with you. Okay, um, so this is a really big myth that that I really want to debunk is that women only do this because men pressure them to do it. What is you talk to a lot of men, you talk to women, you talk to couples. What's your sense on on this one? I'm really curious um about your thoughts on this one, Lexi.

SPEAKER_05 26:09

So, although it is true that it's usually the man that brings this dynamic to the attention of uh the woman, um, that is not always the case. And I have had clients, several clients, where the woman actually brought it up. And um, you know, in some cases the man was like, seriously, I thought you'd never asked. That's the best thing ever. Oh my gosh. And then there are other cases where he's like, you know, I never thought about it, but now that you mention it, hell yeah, that's hot. Um but just because the men are typically the ones that bring it up, um, that doesn't mean that they are pressuring the woman. Subdue, and that's bad. Men don't do that. Like, how would you like to feel pressured to do something if if she happens to not be into it? How would you like to feel pressured into something that you're not into? Um but women don't need to you know be pressured into it. Usually the women that do this, um, there's there's a lot of benefits to being a cuckoldress. And so um saying that we only do this because we're pressured into it is is not true. Um, but you know, being a cuckoldress has an intoxicating power to it. Um we enjoy being able to make you guys squirm with just a word, you know, just just a sentence whispered in your ear, just a tease, um, you know, like showing you pictures of our encounters, you know, like we love having that effect, such a strong effect on you guys. We love being in charge. We love um again, getting that variety, getting um that novelty. Um, you know, the women that do this, they're they're usually not doing it from pressure from men, they're doing it because they want to. And the ones that do end up trying it and try to do it as best they can because they're being pressured, it doesn't work out well. Like, that's not a happy ending in the making.

SPEAKER_00 28:10

I agree. And my favorite ones are the ones that where you are having so much fun with somebody else that you forget that I exist. So you're not, in other words, you're not doing it for me, like at that moment in time. Um, you know that I enjoy it, but I'm almost like an afterthought because you're you're engulfed in somebody else. And and so that that to me shows me that you're not, it's just not all about, hey, I'm just doing this for my husband. Like you're actually getting something out of it, which um, which is what I want. I just, I just really want you happy.

SPEAKER_04 28:41

Um next one, it's all about humiliation.

SPEAKER_00 28:46

Yeah, that's I mean, it depends. For some couples, humiliation is like a really big part of the cuckold dynamic. And if you were to, if if your view on cuckolding is just what you've seen on the internet and porn and and Reddit forums and that kind of stuff, you would think that every cuckold couple is into humiliation. For us, that's just not the case. I'm we're very into teasing, but I wouldn't say we're into humiliation. Would you agree with that?

SPEAKER_05 29:14

Yeah, I I don't think that there, you know, I think that there's hum a humiliation aspect in general to this whole thing that's just naturally in it and ingrained in it because you know, it is the wife having sex with a different person other than her partner, her husband. Um, so that that in and of itself can be humiliating. But for some couples, that's where it stops. You know, there's not um, you know, the the verbal teasing is not humiliating or degrading in nature, typically. Um, and then there's others where it absolutely is, and it can be, you know, to someone in, you know, a normie on the outside hearing it, they might cringe and be like, oh my gosh, did she say that? And you know, you have to assure them, oh no, she loves him. Don't worry. You know, this is love talk.

SPEAKER_00 30:04

It's our love language.

SPEAKER_05 30:05

Love language.

SPEAKER_00 30:06

Teasing is our love language.

SPEAKER_05 30:07

Me, me using all of these horrible things. Yeah. So I think that, you know, for a lot of people, and I mean the the men that that do enjoy humiliation, they they don't just enjoy it, like they eat it up. They it's the best thing.

SPEAKER_00 30:20

Um Yeah, not knocking the humiliation. If you're into that, like go for it. Have fun with it. You know, make sure that you all are you have your boundaries in place, you're communicating. If something does hurt, like have some kind of a safe word so so your partner knows, oh, oh, that that actually, that actually stung.

SPEAKER_05 30:39

Yeah. In that case, um, I really think the green light, red light, yellow light works well. Um, because then because, you know, guys, we are not us us women, we're we're not psychic. You know, we can't, we're not in your head. So it's hard for us, you know, we're we're working the tightrope trying to do a balancing act and figuring out how far to push you and what just what to say and how harsh to say it. And so, you know, help us out a little bit beforehand. Let us know, kind of give us some ideas of what would be cool with you and um, you know, what would be off limits. That having that conversation first is vital for for really, you know, successful interactions. But also while it's going on, again, we're we're doing our best, guys. Um a simple yellow light tells us, okay, all right. So you're not turned off by the comment I just made, but I'm pushing it and I'm not I'm not gonna go any further with that. I'm gonna back off on whatever it was I was just talking about.

SPEAKER_00 31:44

You know, some men love um small penis humiliation or something like that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 31:49

Yeah. And then, you know, other men absolutely don't. And so well, we're not we're not psychic, so help us out.

SPEAKER_00 31:55

Everybody is different. Everybody is different. And, you know, if you look at, you know, stag vixen type dynamics, there's there's really like not any humiliation or that kind of stuff with that one, or at least that's kind of the the more the definition is where it crosses from stag vixen to cuck holding, you add some of these more stuff, like the husband is left involved. And and to me, that's where we really cross the line from stag vixen to cuck hold, cuckholders, is when I stopped being as involved.

SPEAKER_03 32:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 32:21

Um, like that, that to me is what kind of separates separates us along with like all the teasing and stuff that you do now. I I think that's where where we changed into this kind of a dynamic.

SPEAKER_05 32:31

Right. And then, you know, other couples will take it a lot further and there'll be a lot more um cuckolding aspects that um push it even further away from stagvixen and just normal hot wife.

SPEAKER_00 32:42

Right, exactly. So the last one, the last one we want to address is um the myth once you open the door, there's no going back. What are your thoughts about that? Yeah, I'm really curious about this from your perspective, Lexi, because you know, you have, you know, you you have this open palette right now, right? Is that the right way to say it? I don't know if that's the is a palette the right way. I don't know what I'm talking about. You you you have a canvas you can paint on. That's what I'm looking for. Canvas, right? You have this canvas you can paint on with basically anybody you want to. Um, well, like, what are your thoughts? Like what once the door is open, is there any going back?

SPEAKER_05 33:19

So this is this can be a delicate one because um there's it's not true, but things might never be quite exactly the same. So you have to be aware of that and not enter into this sort of dynamic lightly. Um there you, you know, relationships evolve and boundaries evolve. Um, our boundaries have evolved, and and most people I talk to over time, the longer you're in this relationship, you the maybe the rules change a bit and boundaries change a bit. But um there's nothing that says that once you do this, you can you can never stop. And it's now this is your life and this is your dynamic uh welcome. You know, it's you you are free to try something out. And if it works for you, great. You might want to do it another time or 50. But if it doesn't work for you, then you can, you know, if you can, if you if you're feeling uncomfortable closing the door entirely, shutting it, just put it on pause and say, you know, I'm I'm maybe let's take a little break. Um, you know, I'm not quite sure how I'm feeling about this. Um I'm not, you know, sure it was exactly what I thought in my head. And now that we've done it, maybe this is how I feel. But um, you know, there's there's no rules that say that once you've done this, that your whole entire relationship is changed forever and you can't go backward. And that's that's not true. You absolutely can stop and still have a perfectly happy, healthy relationship that never involves um cuck holding or even kinky relationship dynamics again. That's fine.

SPEAKER_00 35:02

So you're saying we're not gonna be doing this at the age of 95?

SPEAKER_05 35:05

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_00 35:08

I don't know. I don't know, honey. I no, I completely agree with you. That I I think you can always stop, you can pause, you can change dynamics. I mean, there's so many fun things that you can do. Do I think that you can go from this to like a completely vanilla relationship? Yeah, like I think it's possible. Do I think it's likely? I mean, I don't know. I have no idea. Um, but I I I mean, you all you all have to take that individually. Um, but I think it is possible that, you know, the things can change.

SPEAKER_05 35:39

Yeah, and and here's the thing though, if if you happen to be the partner that brought this up and really, really wants this, maybe you've wanted it for a long time and you have wanted so badly to get your partner into it. And oh my gosh, miracle of miracles, you actually got him or her to do it. And then they're like, you know what? I tried this and it's not for me. You are gonna have to, you know, love your partner enough to accept their answer and where they stand and not pressure them, push them, manipulate them, guilt them, anything like that. Like, you know, if if they gave it a try for you and they are not feeling it, then you know, just you gotta be happy that you had that one experience and um, you know, don't show, don't be resentful. Be be happy that it happened and um that they were willing to step so far outside of their obvious comfort zone in order to make such a a leap. Um, you know, but you have to be willing to stand by your relationship because the relationship is what matters most, not the lifestyle.

SPEAKER_00 36:49

Amen. All right. Let's go to now that was a good discussion. I like that. I hope that we busted some myths for some folks and and helped kind of set you up for kind of just sorting some of these thoughts out as as we kind of talk through them too. So let's go to some listener questions. So one is was emailed in, and then we have a voice one. So the first one is, and for some reason it didn't say a location where this person is, but it says, um, love the show. Lexi has a great radio voice. Yes, you do, honey. Would love to hear more about her dates, especially talking about different dick sizes. Okay. Um, would love to hear about negative aspects of this life. Like if she caught feelings for somebody or uh the other way around. This is a fear that we all have. To this end, love the podcasts where Lexi and Chris's friend went to a club and how she kept her word and not fuck the guy. Love her integrity, keep up the great work.

SPEAKER_04 37:44

Oh, that's a nice.

SPEAKER_00 37:45

I've gotten a lot of compliments about that episode, Lexi, and how you how you kind of kept your word that night. So good for you on keeping your word that night.

SPEAKER_05 37:53

I know. Much, much to his disappointment.

SPEAKER_00 37:55

Much to my disappointment.

SPEAKER_05 37:56

Yeah, your disappointment, his disappointment.

SPEAKER_00 37:58

His disappointment. Every me, I think the only two people who were disappointed were me and that guy. But everybody else is applauding your integrity.

SPEAKER_05 38:05

Nice.

SPEAKER_00 38:06

So, okay, so the other parts about the that question.

SPEAKER_05 38:09

Um well, you know, I different dick sizes. I mean, it's I I've had some really big ones and I've had some not so big ones, but that they knew how to use it. And so that's okay. The really disappointing ones are the ones where it's not an impressive size and they don't know what the fuck they're doing. Um, those are never fun. And Chris doesn't like those either because then he's like at home just waiting, practically wagging his tail, like, tell me, tell me how it went.

SPEAKER_00 38:39

And I'm like, uh Yeah, when it's the yeah, when it's bad. Like that's such a letdown.

SPEAKER_05 38:46

It's such a letdown for all involved.

SPEAKER_00 38:48

For everybody.

SPEAKER_05 38:49

Yeah. But um, you know, negative aspects of this life, like if she caught feelings. So I I have not um, you know, I I've had some like little mini crushes, right? But I have not like fallen for anyone, you know, and I um, you know, I've had some some guys get crushes on me, um, but I don't think that they, you know, loved me either, you know, like it's just I haven't done that, and I'm not sure that I ever would. But um, you know, negative aspects would just be, you know, there have been times where maybe I didn't have a great time and I don't really want to see that one again, that person. And letting people down gently can be difficult to do, and I don't like confrontation. And so that's a negative aspect because you know, it's it's bound to happen sometimes, you know. You you you we're not all compatible. And um, so I've hated, you know, having to like I'm fine being bitchy when I am cuck old dressy, but you know, I hate being bitchy just, you know, when I'm letting someone down like that. So that was a negative aspect. I feel bad.

SPEAKER_00 40:06

Yeah, I I um I haven't seen you, I mean, you I I have seen you kind of um with your I remember that first guy you had kind of a crush on. And I mean, I thought it was, I thought it was fun. I thought it was cute when you had a crush on him. But I mean it's also, it's also as you know, for my for my role, it's a little bit harder, obviously, emotionally when you have when you have feelings for the person. Um, but I get it. And like I'm cool with it. Like I don't have I don't have any issue with it. Okay, the next question is um we got another voice question from um from our from that same gentleman from Maine. So let's go ahead and uh you might remember a couple of episodes ago we pillate some questions from uh from this guy. And so this is a follow-up from our friend in Maine.

SPEAKER_01 40:53

Uh thanks for answering my question so fast, so incredible. And uh sorry about the assumption I'm just on the sex saying stuck with the uh cage and the Chris's cage for a lot of the time. I just made an assumption that you had very little sex, but I bet on that one. So this question is is more or less too um based on do you have a boundary set for not having a relationship with the bull outside of marriage? Because I see that like 99% of the time that you're seeing where they uh where the wife has a relationship, actual relationship with the bull. And uh I know it's you you catch moments and stuff like that, that makes sense, no big deal. But if you actually have the relationship with the bull, like 99% the cuck gets pushed out. A lot of times they actually even move into the house kind of thing. And so but uh or the or the wife just checks out completely. Thanks.

SPEAKER_05 41:55

All right, so um you know, I am my first thing is just curiosity. Like I I'm just so curious where um you know our our friend is is getting those statistics that like the vast, vast majority of the time the the wife is running off with the bull. Cause I mean I haven't I haven't heard that. Um and I I haven't seen that in my coaching.

SPEAKER_00 42:23

Um, you know, our friends who have the same dynamic.

SPEAKER_05 42:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 42:26

Not like all of them are happy. Like none of them are running off with the bulls.

SPEAKER_05 42:31

Like we're we're in several groups where it's I mean, I like I think that it does happen, but I think it's rare. And again, it's because the relationship is on incredibly unstable footing. Um, you know, the the only time I think I've heard of something remotely like that happening, they were already on the outs. The the couple, the um that was doing the cuck holding, they were already on the outs. Things were not good between them. And so um that's the only one I can think of where I've actually heard that. Um, everyone else, it's kind of a well, bulls come and go. And so they'll like they'll have a bull for months or even years, and then that relationship will change. Maybe the bull gets in a relationship of their own, and so they're now they're not a bull anymore. But um, I haven't really seen that. And um, you know, I just I think that if you have the good foundation, if you have the strong relationship and love between the partners, then it shouldn't be an issue. As far as our rules, um, you know, Chris has expressed to me that he is absolutely fine and you know, would would be just peach keen with me meeting a bull and actually forming a relationship where you know we see each other regularly and are more of like a thing, I guess. Um I have not found someone that I was willing to have that with. Um so we haven't experienced that. But I mean, am I am I saying the rules right? I mean, is this Yeah, I know.

SPEAKER_00 44:08

I I I I think you are. And um, you know, the other thing that that that our friend in Maine pointed out here is the bulls moving into the house. I don't think that's happening outside of a fantasy chat room. Um, but or something like that. It's it just seems it seems far-fetched. I mean, maybe maybe it doesn't.

SPEAKER_05 44:25

That's why I'm just I'm so curious. Like, where um I wanna I want to see it. I don't want to know. Like that'd be horrible if that was like really happening all the time. But I I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 44:35

I I don't think I don't think it's happening. I I think this is uh I think that's a little bit too much cut porn. Um could I see a real a dynamic, a polyamorous dynamic where that you know the other partner moves in? Like, yeah, I could see that in polyamory. Um I I don't really think this that happens in this dynamic too much. That's my opinion. And in polyamory, it's not somebody else coming in to take over either. It has nothing to do with pushing somebody out.

SPEAKER_05 44:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 45:00

All right. Um, so I I love this episode, Lexi. I I think we we covered a lot of different topics, and um, there's just so many misconceptions that come from people who have never actually talked to couples living this lifestyle like you or I. So I'm glad we're able to answer these things. And whether you agree with us or disagree, we hope that this conversation gave you something to think about. And we'd love to hear from you. So send us a send us a fan mail, send us a voice, a voicemail if you can also. Um, what's the biggest misconception you've heard about cuck holding? Or maybe what's the one thing that you believed yourself before you learned more? Um, we want to hear your thoughts about this. Send us fan mail, send us questions, and um we'll we'll get them, we'll get them on air. So until next time, Lexi, take care of each other, keep communicating, keep growing together, and we'll see you on the next episode. You want to say bye to our fans, Lexi?

SPEAKER_05 45:53

Bye, guys.

SPEAKER_00 45:53

Bye.