Ep 17 Icky Vicky

What the Dickens?!

Did the Victorians really believe strapping electric belts to their privates could improve fertility? And what on earth is a penny-farthing "bike face"?

Welcome to Icky Vicky - our most gloriously unhinged episode yet.

This week's episode is a little different. It's one long outtake from our early recording days, and after listening back, we decided it was far too ridiculous to leave on the external hard drive. 

Join the Sperm Sisters (Gemma, Natasha and Helen) as we tumble down the rabbit hole of Victorian fertility treatments, bizarre medical advice, and historical myths that somehow managed to convince people they were improving their chances of having a baby.

This episode covers:

• Victorian fertility treatments
• The history of fertility medicine
• Weird medical myths
• Fertility facts vs fiction
• Sperm Sisters chaos

If you've had a long week and just need a laugh, this one's for you.

🎙️ Sperm Sisters Podcast - Icky Vicky

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Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:00

Doobita ba-da-da-ba Sperm sisters This is a story about sisters.

SPEAKER_03 0:19

Just not the kind that you're expecting. Three years ago, we were strangers, living separate lives.

SPEAKER_01 0:25

Now we know we're biological sisters, connected by the same sperm donor. And that's just the beginning.

SPEAKER_04 0:32

This podcast dives headfirst into the how, the why, and the uncomfortable questions no one seems to want to answer.

SPEAKER_01 0:38

Uncovering secrets the medical world would rather keep buried. How many donor-conceived people are there really? No one can give a straight answer.

SPEAKER_03 0:46

Not the clinics, not the system, no one. So, how many siblings could be walking past us every day without a clue? It's messy, it's shocking.

SPEAKER_01 0:56

At times it's almost impossible to believe. And somehow, it's also really funny.

SPEAKER_04 1:02

Come with us as we dig deeper, ask the uncomfortable questions and laugh our way through the chaos of discovering who we really are. And just how many of us there might be.

SPEAKER_01 1:12

Coming up on this week's episode of Sperm Sisters.

SPEAKER_03 1:20

We're treating you to an early episode we recorded which did not go to plan. A half an hour long outtake, if you will.

SPEAKER_02 1:30

Join us next episode. Jack's electro dick.

SPEAKER_00 1:35

What makes Helen wet herself?

SPEAKER_02 1:40

Wait, stop! I've just wept myself to go to the toilet.

SPEAKER_00 1:47

And what does bicycle face look like? Bicycle face. Bicycle face. Please enjoy the silliness from your sperm sisters.

SPEAKER_03 2:02

Welcome back for another episode of Sperm Sisters. Are we ready to get our history on? Yes. Because I'm wearing this sh this woofful shirt. Gemma's gorgeous. Gemma, I've got to say, there's been complaints about how you put drinks on the sofa. Who complains? You. My friend Sophie said that she could bear refreshing. Said she God forbid I'm hydrated. It's how it's balanced. And to be fair, that was. Yeah, and you were like, I'm wearing the stupid shirt. Okay, so should we introduce ourselves as per? Yes. Let's introduce ourselves. Eldest, please speak up. Hello, everybody. My name is Natasha. I am the eldest sister, and I'm 36. I'm next. Um my name's Gemma. I'm the middle one, and I'm the one running the episode today. Very exciting. I'm also 36. Hi, my name's Helen. I'm 35, and I'm the youngest out of all three of us. I wanted to mix it up today a little bit. Because the whole concept of donor conception and the history has always fascinated me. Learning what mum went through with, you know, treatments and things that wouldn't happen today. For example, how many embryos would be put into somebody during the treatment process. But I want to go back even further than that. I just want to look into the Victorian times. Fertility treatment in the Victorian times. Oh, I dread to think what it was like. Well, it weren't great, was it? We're talking Oliver Twist, um uh Charles Dickens, who I believe wrote Oliver Twist, and that's my knowledge of the Victorian era. Yeah, so I'm wearing my booth on top in honour of Queen Vic. Queen Vicky. Do you like? I do actually. Do you know what it No, don't worry. Tell me! No, no, no. Titanic? I just because you were talking about Victorian times, I started to think of the Mary Poppins bit where they're at the um with the penguins. Oh my god, yeah. Yeah, yes. But I didn't want you to get in your own. I don't think you look like a penguin. I just think that's the stripes that they wore. Thank you. Okay. Well, shall we imagine that we are going to be talking about Mary Poppins during this? Yes. Yes. Let's imagine Mr. and Mrs. Poppins were having a bit of difficulty having baby poppins. They decided they needed a bit of help. There wasn't the likes of Harley Street for, you know, put the teeth in, fertility clinics that our parents went to. So they asked around. They asked for advice. Now, what I would like to show is play the game. Sexy science or absolute delusion. Round one! Electric belts for virility. Victorian men believed wearing electric belts around their waist and genitals could improve virility, cure impotence, and boost fertility. Real or fake? Real. As in It's gotta be real. But with the when was electricity impression? But with the I would imagine that that would just dial any sperm that you have. An electric belt. Yeah, but it was a big thing. I don't think that's true. Unfortunately, it's true. Did it work? I didn't think it worked. It says in the late 1800s, electrotherapy became wildly fashionable. Companies sold electric belts containing small batteries that supposedly sent healing currents through the body. They were marketed to men suffering from weakness, impotence, lost manhood, low energy, and infertility. I mean, in a in a way, is that that's not that dissimilar to a tens machine. Do you strap that to your genitals? Yeah. You not to your genitals, but didn't say around the waist, and like in the birth, you can pop a tens machine on.

SPEAKER_04 6:44

Fair enough. I think it is different though, isn't it?

SPEAKER_03 6:47

I'm just saying, if I was in the Victorian era, I'll give it a go. Belt me up, baby. Do you think Jack would want a tens machine on his dick?

unknown 6:57

No.

SPEAKER_01 6:57

Sorry, that's aggressive.

SPEAKER_03 7:04

We could call him.

SPEAKER_02 7:06

Call Jack!

SPEAKER_03 7:08

No, I don't think you would, but he has said, he said to you on holiday last week that he would be willing to put the tens machine on his stomach and put it up to full pelt to know what birth feels like. Well, it's on the pod now.

SPEAKER_02 7:25

Join us next episode. Jack's electro dick. Oh no, poor Jackie.

SPEAKER_03 7:36

Poor Jackie. Okay, so it says here some unspecifically targeted men who suffered from nervous exhaustion. From masturbation. God, there must have been so many exhausted donors walking up and down Harley Street in the 80s then.

SPEAKER_02 7:54

Who were just chronic exhaustion? Chronic masturbation. No.

SPEAKER_03 8:02

Victorian fertility tonic sometimes contained cocaine. True or false? True, because Coca-Cola was also cocaine. Was it? Is it? I think cocaine is a no. You think cocaine's a no? Yeah, cocaine is a yes because it was an originally in the recipe for Coca-Cola. In the late 19th century, cocaine was legal and appeared in medicines, wines, tonics, cough remedies, energy elixirs. Wow. So Coca-Cola is because it's a caffeinator product. So yeah, good God, she's right. Doctors believed stimulants such as cocaine could improve vitality, libido, and sexual stamina. Wow. Some fertility or nerve restoration tonics contained coca. I didn't know this. Extract. I'm learning to the first one.

SPEAKER_02 9:02

Wait, stop. I've just worked myself to go to the toilet. Sorry! Stop making up the cocaine.

SPEAKER_03 9:18

Shall we just have a quick nosy to see if cocaine actually has an impact on your sperm count? If a donor walked up to sperm bank and if it had a bit of Charlie the night before, or whatever, do you think that would that show up?

SPEAKER_04 9:35

Studies have found that cocaine could directly bind to human sperm, potentially allowing the sperm to act as a vector that delivers the drug to the egg.

SPEAKER_03 9:49

What does that mean then? So the embryo would be Well, I guess it's like exposure can cause changes in DNA, methylation. What the fuck? So does that mean that like I think it would have to be um like an immediate. I think screen let's talk about the screening.

SPEAKER_04 10:13

Oh, what does that implications mean for donor conception?

SPEAKER_03 10:15

So sperm bags and egg donation clinics have very now they have very strict screening processes that include testing for illicit drug use. Right.

SPEAKER_04 10:23

Cocaine use within a specific time frame, for instance, within 90 days or 48 hours to four days for blood urine samples would likely lead to a donor being disqualified.

SPEAKER_03 10:34

Likely, but not guaranteed. But also 90 is mental. That's a month and a half. Definitely donors back in the 80s, the 80s, yeah, all of them will have been on that. Could you even do drug tests in the 80s? I don't know. Question three! Sleeping facing north. Victorians believed sleeping facing north improved fertility and reproductive health. Sexy science or stupid delusion. Was that what it was? No, it was something else, but it's just as good. Stupid delusion. I think maybe something in that you've got to think about when dogs poo and they circle around so that they're facing a certain way in accordance to the earth's uh magnetic field. So maybe there is something in that. Have you just made that up? Nope. Well, do you know what? Whether that's true or not, if Helen went back in time to the Victorian era, it should be very much welcome. Because they had the same absolutely crackpot theories of Victorian health culture, which was heavily influenced by pseudoscience, magnetism theories, and natural health beliefs. Holistic. Holistic! But variant of holistic. I'd love to know if that's true. Any dogs out there? Message us in the comments. Bow house. That's quite interesting. Do you think maybe they should have all fertility clinics facing north? If if it worked for the Victorians. Did it work? I don't know. I didn't ask them. But it's what they believed at the time. Uh I don't know if it's the advice now or not, but magnetic theories were hugely trendy during the era. Uh, this overlaps of spiritualism, animal magnetism, early wellness culture. Yeah. Well I believe it. Right, round four. Uh eating oysters daily. Victorians believed oysters improved fertility and sexual performance. Is that real? Or nada? Well, they say oysters are an aphrodisiac. Yeah. Have you ever had an oyster?

SPEAKER_04 13:02

I've tried to swallow one and it's not gone down.

SPEAKER_03 13:06

Oh. Have you? No. I don't think I could do that. Scared you're allergic. Yeah. Scared I'll get food pussy. If it's not stored correctly, that's the recipe for it. That's genuinely why I won't have it. Because also normally, if you're on like holiday or something, or if you're at like a food market, how long have they been sat on the ice for show? Yeah, I know. Do you know what I mean? Um it's not for me. No, no. Also it's snotty. Yeah. Well, Victorians believed that they boosted male virility, libido, and reproductive strength, just like today. And it's not completely out of the question. People still do do this because oysters contain zinc, and zinc is important for sperm production and testosterone. Oh, interesting. That is good. So they did get that one right. Yeah. There's no evidence that oysters magically increases fertility overnight. Victorians also ate enormous amounts of oysters because they were cheap street food at the time. Ah, okay. I wonder if there's now, for people donating sperm now, if the clinics encourage them to take um like multivitamins that contain zinc and 100%. Sure, the really bougie sperm bank should offer like a glass of champagne to the mums and oysters to the dads. Yeah. Oh yeah. Walk in. Yeah. We're marketing that, that's ours. Yeah. And the final one, round five. Bicycle riding damages fertility. Victorians warned that bicycle riding could damage fertility and second law house. Do you think that that is true?

SPEAKER_04 14:52

Because I feel like I've watched it in like an episode of Danton or something.

SPEAKER_03 14:58

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know? Yeah. Like just the motion on the ball bag.

SPEAKER_02 15:08

I guess. The sweat.

SPEAKER_03 15:14

You're bang on right. Yeah. You're right. So there was a very real panic. When bicycles became popular in the late 1800s, which wasn't long ago. I feel like bikes were around like since the Tudor times. I know they were, but that's not the problem here. Right. When bicycles became popular in the late 1800s, moral panic exploded. Doctors warned cycling could supposedly cause infertility, impotence, overstimulation, nervous disorders, and sexual deviance. Sexual deviance. Women especially were targeted. Some physicians claim cycling could damage reproductive organs, make women infertile, and increase sexual urges. I wonder why you'd become sexually deviant riding a bike. Because it's pressing on your bits all the time. It's like activating it like a button. Is that why like that's where the Please stop? Never want to see you make direct eye contact with me doing that again. Hideous.

SPEAKER_04 16:23

I felt like I was just in the middle of something.

SPEAKER_03 16:25

I really wish I wasn't about that.

SPEAKER_04 16:28

Do you think that's where the phrase came about? People being like, oh, ride a bike.

SPEAKER_03 16:34

Oh. You know, like, what's Gino de Campos like your grandmother's a bike? There was even a fake condition called bicycle face.

SPEAKER_02 16:44

Supposedly caused by excessive. Cycling. This is mental.

SPEAKER_03 16:54

Bicycle face? Bicycle face. What does that do though? Just your face. It's just your face, yeah. I've no idea. But do you know what I will do? I will put up some pictures of if there are any bicycle faces. Like, if it was a thing, but they're saying that it was completely made up. No. It's just not a thing. It's probably just people exercising. What is life? What is life? Okay. Modern studies. Oh, thank God it relates back to overconception. Breathe a sigh of relief now. Right. Modern studies suggest excessive professional cycling may temporarily affect sperm quality in some cases due to heat pressure, long saddle time. Okay. If you've been in the saddle too long, okay, so there's actually some truth to that. So modern day do they advise donors like not to ride bikes?

SPEAKER_02 18:26

Do you want me to do cuckoo? No. You can if you want to. Oh I'm just gonna get tissues.

SPEAKER_03 18:36

Well, Helen, can donors ride bikes? That isn't specified, but they do say that they should abstain from ejaculation from two to five days before donation. I don't think that I don't think that happened back in the day though. Well, no, because they went to had they break for lunch and then they went back, didn't they? They should avoid excessive alcohol, recreational drugs, nicotine, and anabolic steroids. Okay. Sorry. They should stay hydrated and get normal sleep. They should avoid high heat exposure shortly beforehand, so hot tubs, saunas, prolonged laptop heat on the lap. No way! So maybe that's a bit like the bike. They should tell the clinic about any illnesses, medications, recent travel or STI risks, and follow hygiene instructions before collecting the sample. And on that cheery Al Gavna notes, that's my Victorian impression. Did you like it? I thought it was very good. Very good. Thank you so much. Back to normal content, I suppose, probably next time. But yes, thank you so much for listening. Um, like, share, subscribe, and all of that jazz, because it really helps us, doesn't it? It does it. It does. Share everyone! Share it with a friend. Well done.