Trusting God in the Tension

What does it look like to trust God when things feel uncertain—or even uncomfortable?

In this episode, I sit down with my friend Teresa to talk about learning to hear God’s voice and follow His lead in real, everyday moments. From wrestling with failure and intrusive thoughts to stepping out in bold faith with complete strangers, Teresa shares how God has met her in both the tension and the breakthrough.

We also talk about how different our callings can look in different seasons, whether you’re out traveling and evangelizing or at home raising your family, and why both matter deeply in God’s Kingdom.

If you’ve ever questioned whether you’re hearing God correctly or wondered if you’re doing enough, this conversation is a reminder that He’s not asking for perfection, just your willingness to trust Him right where you are.

In This Episode, We Talk About:

• Learning to recognize and trust God’s voice
• Moving from fear and doubt into bold obedience
• Walking through failure, depression, and spiritual warfare
• Real-life stories of sharing faith in everyday moments
• Trusting God in different seasons and callings
• Why love—not perfection—is where it all begins

Key Takeaway

You don’t have to have everything figured out—you just have to be willing to trust God in the tension.

Connect + Resources

Find a devotional to go along with this episode on Substack:

https://open.substack.com/pub/amessyamenpod/p/trusting-god-in-the-tension?r=7wbogv&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true 

Find me on socials: https://linktr.ee/Amessyamenpod

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Life isn't always Sunday best. Sometimes your faith is put to the test. If you feel unseen and all alone, it's time for stories you've never known. Let's find our hope and find our grace in this honest and welcoming space. You are known and you are not alone, my friend. Welcome to a messy amen. A messy amen.

SPEAKER_03 0:30

Hey friends, welcome back to a messy amen, the podcast where we talk about the good, the hard, and the holy parts of real life. I'm Michelle and I'm so glad you're here. Today I wanted to talk to my friend Teresa about the Holy Spirit and all the God moments that she's had in the last few years. Hey Teresa, I'm so glad you're here. Hi. Can you tell me some overarching themes you've seen in your life and how your brain and heart are wired for loving people you see when you're out and about?

SPEAKER_02 1:00

Yeah, so my name is connected to the word harvester. And I've always been one who loved talking to people about Jesus and loving on people. Since I was a little kid, I'd give hugs to people at the store and wonder why my mom wouldn't let me behind the cash register to give the lady a hug. And um just was always trying to tell people about Jesus, even if they spoke another language. I remember trying to act out the story of Jesus' death on the cross because they didn't speak English, um, or different things, and really it's just a a love for God and for people that draws me in to share about Him with others.

SPEAKER_03 1:46

Um, when do you remember accepting Jesus into your heart?

SPEAKER_02 1:50

Oh, when I was about four years old, I was so young, but I wanted to follow Jesus at a young age. Um, and as I got older, um, I got baptized as a teenager, but that was more out of like tradition than it was out of heart desire. Um, but when I was at a conference in Hong Kong, I actually rededicated my life to the Lord. And it's when I realized that God doesn't have grandchildren, He only has children, and a lot of um my faith up to that point was based off of my parents' faith and not my own, and God really highlighted that to me, and that he wanted a direct relationship with me, and started to show me it that this was a relationship with him and not just a list of traditions and things I had to do.

SPEAKER_03 2:41

So good. Not just do's and don'ts, but that God truly loves us and wants to know us. Yes. Awesome. Go backing up a little bit further though, your parents were in uh ministry before you were even born. Can you tell me a little bit about that?

SPEAKER_02 2:56

Yeah, so my parents worked at a local university with international students, and so I grew up celebrating holidays. Um, like it's almost Easter, and so we would take students with us um to church or have them over to our house or celebrate Christmas with um the international students and invite them into Bible studies or English language learning um to um offer them opportunities to talk about Jesus.

SPEAKER_03 3:29

So you had a lot of friends growing up where you might not have spoken the same language or you, you know, from different places all around the world. Yeah. What specific thing has felt like a harder spiritual battle battle that you don't talk about as much? So maybe it was like a mental health struggle or um a point where you might have felt farther away from God.

SPEAKER_02 3:50

Yeah. Well when I was finishing my education, I was really challenged at an internship and it wasn't quite the right fit, and it was trying my best, but it didn't end up passing my first internship and really hit me hard, and I felt the devil saying, Well, if you can't ever, you know, you can't even do this in America, why would God ever want you to take this to another country and work in another country for his name? And you know, you're just a failure. And I recognized right away that it was the voice of the enemy, and then I heard the Holy Spirit say, Tessa, I love you despite your failures. And it was one of those moments where I had to decide which voice was I gonna listen to. And I just was so overcome by the love of God amidst my failures.

SPEAKER_03 4:47

So good. Yeah, I definitely underst um I understand that on a personal level. But there's um something to be said though about that relationship with God and feeling like He's talking to you and having that um those spiritual um moments. I've started using a saying, spiritual downloads, when talking to um talking about a special word from God. Can you tell me your ukulele story and maybe another recent moment where God was clearly working?

SPEAKER_02 5:16

Yeah, so one of my favorite stories, I was flying from California back to Michigan, and uh the only cheap flight was a layover in Las Vegas at like 2 a.m. in the morning, and I was like, I don't think I want to do that. Um, is it even safe for me to travel by myself? And all these thoughts of fear came up, and the Lord said, Don't worry, you're a daughter of God, and bring your ukulele with you and just worship, and you'll be fine. And so it was the first time I brought my ukulele with me in the airport, and I get to Las Vegas and there's slot machines everywhere, and I just decided to pray over the slot machines and just pray over the region and play my ukulele in worship. And as the night got later and later, I just remember sitting down and thinking, is that all God? Is that all you wanted to do here? And I realized um in that moment a woman coming and approaching me and she said, Do you play ukulele? And I said, Yeah, and I said, Want me to play you a song? So I played her a song, and this presence of God just filled me with the boldness that came over me after that song. I just boldly asked, Do you have a relationship with God and do you want to accept him into your life? And she said, No, I don't have a relationship with God, but I want to. And I was like, All right. So right there she um confessed that Jesus Christ is Lord and asked for forgiveness in her life. And um she's like, Man, now I'm going to California to party, and now I can't take my drugs and and alcohol, and I'm a Christian now. And I was like, Yeah, amen. And then the Holy Spirit said, now that she's received forgiveness, I want to um her to forgive certain people in her life. And the Holy Spirit was highlighting there had been men in her life who had abused her. And I looked at her and I said, I believe the Lord wants you to forgive certain men in your life who have really um harmed you, and I want you to say their name out loud and say, I forgive you. But she tried, but she was having such a hard time just doing that. She was sweating, she was shaking, and I was like, Wow, something is holding her back. And then the Holy Spirit said, like, there's anger still in her heart that she has to confess the anger. So once she confessed the anger and I commanded the anger to leave, um, she was then able to say the names of the people that had affected her. And the first name was Francisco, which is crazy because I was praying to God where He wanted me to go next and bring confirmation. And I was praying about San Francisco at the time.

SPEAKER_03 8:06

That's so good. And then um, can you tell me another quick one um similar um that just God has been talking to you and just really um giving you these hints and you know, you can call them little tokens or um hints like there's a word I'm missing right here. God winks? Yes, something.

SPEAKER_02 8:28

Yes, yeah. Um this next story is actually when I was in San Francisco and I was out and about that day with some friends, and I asked the Lord for a word, just uh something to highlight my day, something that I could look for. And I saw a blue hat, just a plain dark blue hat. And I was like, okay, is it is that like too simple? Or like does it you know, I just was like, okay, whatever. I feel like a little kid here on a treasure hunt, but um looked for it throughout my whole day, didn't see one dark blue hat. And I go home and I'm about to go into my apartment, and right outside on the street, there was a woman, an unhoused woman with a um with a dark blue hat. And it had no symbol, nothing. It was just exactly what I had seen in my mind earlier that day. And I told God, I was like, I am so tired, I don't want to go. I like, I'm done, I'm checked out for the day. Why did you have to bring her right now when I'm like not ready? And um, the the Lord just draws us with his love. It's just so beautiful. There's always more, you know, with the Lord. There's always more grace, there's always more. So I was like, okay, let's do this. So I I uh turn around, go over to her, and I say, Hey, how you doing? I I like your your blue hat.

SPEAKER_01 9:58

And she's like, Oh, well, it's awful. Today's my birthday, and uh the police just stole my drugs. And I was like, oh man, um, well, sometimes God works in mysterious ways.

SPEAKER_02 10:12

But can I buy you some ice cream at the corner store? So she's like, Yeah, this is the best day ever. Bought her like a couple ice creams and different things from the corner store, and she was like, Wow, and I was like, Wow, God knew her birthday was today. And when I took a moment to say, God, like, I love you, like highlight someone to me, he showed me her, the blue hat, you know. And so since then, you know, I saw her around the city and we always had a special relationship.

SPEAKER_03 10:45

Aw, you kept seeing her. That's so cool. I'm kind of envious of this um journey and the um the bold faith because you are um single and you travel and you're, you know, going on airplanes and all these things, and I'm lucky if I go on an airplane once a year, and um and so when you talk about this, I'm just like, my ministry is look so different than yours. You know, I'm a stay-at-home mom of two, and I'm really been convicted lately to th look at my children through the uh like a lens of faith and lens of God, and saying that this is where he has me. And so I'm, you know, sitting still snuggling my babies in a weird way sometimes can be a challenge because of the pressures to do housework or, you know, make something of myself or whatever the case may be. That that's to me, that's my that's my goal, and that's my ministry right now is to raise up godly tiny humans into grown-up humans.

SPEAKER_02 11:46

Honestly, kingdom families are one of the most powerful weapons, I think, in the kingdom of God, and I think that's why the enemy is often attacking um marriages and relationships between parents and their kids, because he knows that the kingdom family, this is this is the fullness of like what God has designed for relationship with us too. So what you're doing is so important to never underestimate it.

SPEAKER_03 12:12

Yes, but that that just makes me think of um just how vastly different that God can use us and how beautiful they both can be. Um so when we just talk about how you you know God can use us in transform situations, was there maybe even a time where not just feeling like a failure, but even getting um a little bit darker than that, like uh that I would have never even thought that you oh um Teresa's gonna feel like depressed or even um really down in the dumps. Can you speak a little on that?

SPEAKER_02 12:48

Yeah, sure. So yeah, typically I'm super uppy, happy person, um, but at one point in my life it felt like everything was going wrong with my parents, things with um our ministry, um, things with my own job. Um, it was all um kind of removed from our lives. And so even to the point where we were like, we don't know how we're gonna pay the the bills for the the house. And it just felt so difficult. And um I was kind of like I'm single, I have no what's my purpose in life, I have no job. Um, I didn't I felt so depressed that I didn't feel like I could minister, didn't even want to go to the store and like see anyone because I didn't want them to ask questions and it was just like this is not me. Um everything anyone said about anything positive, I'd want to twist it negative. Um and I just it definitely was not me. Um but I'd get thoughts um even like go run your car into a tree or things like that. And right away I'd have to really work hard to like no, I don't receive that thought um and fight against that.

SPEAKER_03 14:06

But can you think of a Bible verse that goes along with that real quick? Well, you know, put uh taking each thought captive.

SPEAKER_02 14:13

Yeah, that's a good verse.

SPEAKER_03 14:15

Intrusive thoughts are no joke. Um, but you know, it can happen to the best of us. Continue.

SPEAKER_02 14:21

Yeah, so I just I guess the turnaround for me was actually when I had been invited to a prophetic equipping event uh through a local church that I'd never really been part of before, but I was curious because I was always curious about the prophetic. I didn't know what it was. Um, and previously I was like, God, you know, I don't know what prophetic is, but whatever it is, lay it on me. Like I want it. I'm supposed to want it, I want it. You know what I think that's my secret is I I'm hungry and I'm always like, God, give me more. Like I want to know more. Not in like a greedy way, but in like a a kid who little kid who's always asking for questions and always wants to be with you and always wants to to wants more. So I went to this event and I remember sitting there depressed all my life feeling like a big problem. And I I I had this strange urge to give a Kleenex to the girl sitting next to me that I'd never met. I heard her sniffle, I think, once, and then I just felt really strongly I needed to give her Kleenex. And I'm like, Well, it's cold outside, it doesn't seem like she's sad, um, she doesn't need a Kleenex. But then like this voice inside me was like, She's going to need it. And I'm like, What? That's not encouraging. Like, here's a Kleenex, like you're gonna cry, like what? Um, and but it just kept kind of nagging at me to the point where I was like, you know what? Just to get rid of this nagging feeling, I'm just gonna do it. So I gave the Kleenex to the girl sitting next to me as the guy is speaking on stage, and I kind of whispered, You might need it, really hesitantly, because I didn't know what I was doing. Then at the end, the guy says, Alright, everyone, stand up and give a prophetic word. Someone standing next to you, ask the Lord for something. Um, so we all stand up, and I'm over there thinking, I'm the one in pain, I'm the one suffering, I'm the one depressed. Someone's gonna come give me a word. Um, but the crazy thing was that God actually wanted to use me in my depression. He wanted to show me that like it's him, not me. Um, it's him and me. And so I turned to the woman next to me and I said, Well, I did feel like I was supposed to give you that Kleenex and say you're gonna need it. I had thought she had just thrown the Kleenex away, but she had placed it up her sleeve and pulled it out and said, No, this is so prophetic. And I'm wide-eyed, like, what? Oh, she's like, Actually, I can't cry. I have a really hard time crying, and I've been asking the Lord to help me cry. And a woman before you also gave me a Kleenex and said the same thing, and I was like, Whoa, I had no idea, and I was completely humbled in that moment. I'm depressed, but God in me is unstoppable, and so that was a moment where things started to turn around. I'm like, I guess I'm not useless, like, God is stronger than my depression, and He just gave me courage, and then um things were a lot easier as things got better.

SPEAKER_03 17:32

So, how long ago was that that started every started this whole pr um journey for you? Um, about five years ago. Wow. Do you feel like you wake up every day and ask God for like a a pro prophetic word or a clue or like some kind of thing that can um help somebody? You know, or just that's a great idea.

SPEAKER_02 17:53

I do a couple times I do, you know, but it's scary because I kind of like know if I ask him, he's gonna say something and then like I don't want it. Prayer works, guys, prayer works. So yes, um, though I do sometimes I do do that. Um I can share another quick story that happened when I was in uh a Thai temple in LA and we were going there to kind of minister to the people there and explore the culture. And I was like, Okay, God, like same thing, like what do you want to show me? And I asked him the same question, but this time I felt like I heard God say, What do you want to see happen? And I was like, well um, what do I want to see? Um, I want to see someone's leg get healed. And I just threw a random thing out there. And the thing is with the Lord, I sometimes he does call you to certain opportunities, but other times I think he just creates opportunities out of what we give him. And so I'm there with my friends, and same thing. It's so funny how God works in the last minute. We I don't see anyone with like a cast on their leg or anything. But as we're leaving, I see this really tall woman with a broken leg, and she's sitting there, and I'm like, guys, I know we're leaving, but like just give me three seconds. I just need to go over and talk to this lady real quick. So I go over, and as I'm approaching, her friend leaves her in that minute to go get her some water, and she looks at me, and I'm about to ask if I can pray for her, and she faints, and I catch her in my arms and keep her from like knocking her head out, and I like lie her down on this like bench, and she's a pretty pretty solid woman, and I'm like, whoa! Like here to pray for her, and I end up like catching her, and they bring out some really spunky aroma Thai um spices and she like I keep praying like life, like you will live and not die in Jesus' name, you like life, and I just kept praying that over her. And 911 came, they took her away, and she she she woke up before they took her away. Um, and it seemed to be some heat exhaustion or something, and so um with all of the blood loss and the injury to her leg, I think her body was just over extremely over close, over exerted. So, yeah, um, that was an amazing moment, and I got to talk with her friend named Grace and tell her like how God put me there at just the right time. And I I never did end up getting to pray for her leg. But God is so funny how he works, you know.

SPEAKER_03 20:44

So Yeah, I still think it counts. You caught her. She could have got a concussion. She could have. That's so wild. As you experience all this in the last five years, this to me feels like a whole other person than um so a little backstory. We grew up together. So I've known like I remember you ever since I was like longer than ten, but I really remember like, you know, st but like seven seven, you know, I think six We were digging holes in your sandbox to China. Yeah. So, you know, we were digging as we as far as we could in the sandbox. You actually ended up there years later. But um, so we like when I grew up, I used to um, you know, tell everybody this like you know, weird girl, she's uh into these rules and regulations, and I, you know, and I'm just trying to live my life and you know, not like a bad kid, but just you know, why why ask permission? We can ask forgiveness later on, like just you know, living my own life. And you know, you're like, no, we need to ask your mom if this is okay, we don't want to get in trouble. And I'm just like, oh no, whatever. So, like and then just like the funniest little things, you know, growing up, but then it we're all like you're still always um like there. So like it was never like a falling out or never anything bad that happened. But like the Lord worked on my heart and then he also worked on yours. My examples of the, you know, rules and stuff is kind of like a fun, you know, little kiddish legalism. But can um can you t speak on how you went from a legalistic point of view to more of like a grace-filled point of view and a heart for, you know, to love first, and then like the how that love can lead us to obedience?

SPEAKER_02 22:25

Yeah, sure. Um, yeah, the truth and and rules, they they are very good, but the Lord says if you have not love, you have nothing. And so um I did, I think, grow up in a family where like rules were really important and um strongly. You had four siblings, and they had to keep it. You have to do something wrong, you're gonna get a spanking. So the fear of God was in me. Um, you know, so I think um it kind of parallels with my relationship with God because I kind of felt like my relationship with God was very rule focused, and uh, you just have to do the right things, and then God will be happy with you if you just do the right things. And there came a point when God just started to ask me if I loved him. Do you love me more than your family, your parents, your friends, than sports? I really loved sports. Um, and I kept kind of telling him, honestly, I can't lie to God. Like, no, I didn't love God more than these other things that were like tangible. You know, God is He's definitely very real and tangible in his spiritual way, but hard to physically experience him. And my love language is touched. So I'm like, how can you give me a hug, God? And he's like, Well, let me show you. And like, he'll send someone to give me a hug that day. I'm like, Well, okay. Okay, God. So, yeah, he just really spoke to me, and I realized that the reason I didn't love God is because I never understood how much he really loved me. And so I started to ask him if he loved me, and it really started with a with a revelation in me that God loved me. And um that place of just receiving more of God's love and seeing him work, I then had a deeper ability to like love people better. And there was like a yeah, a switch where now I had just more grace for people because I had more grace for myself. That I was able to receive that love from God and then give that to other people.

SPEAKER_03 24:41

So, in relation to that grace and that um new lens to look at other people, you used to live in San Francisco, which is definitely a hub for sin and godlessness in some respects. So, can you tell me how you can approach that and talk to people and maybe even look past some of the outward sins to get to know them better and how you learn that that's not the point, like that that surface level stuff is not the point what you n what they need um that they need more ministering to their heart, not the outward Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 25:18

So I think it usually starts with me asking God, how much do you love this person, God? Because like I'm kind of like, Do you really love that person? They stink so much and they are doing those drugs and destroying their life, and trying to give them Narcan, and they won't even take the Narcan because they're overdosing like crazy stuff. But you know, God says, I want all people to come into the knowledge of my son Jesus, and he wants all people to be saved, and he gives me a love for them, and once I get to that point where I can see now that God has love for them, um, then I look at I I do see people as people. I I really don't, yeah, see that outward as much. I d I care about their their heart and their relationship with God. So even when it comes to people, I was living in the trans district and there's Castro with a lot of people who are same-sex attracted, and um I feel like people just get caught up a lot on those things. Um when the question really I have is do you have a personal relationship with God? And like, can I create a space for you where you feel comfortable to explore that relationship with God because He really does love you? Because I believe it's the love of God that leads us to repentance. So a lot of times I don't have to tell people what to do. Um, I just need to love them and God speaks to their hearts and will convict them.

SPEAKER_03 26:46

Would you have ever felt that way, you know, 10 years ago, um, 15 years ago? Yeah, probably years ago.

SPEAKER_01 26:53

I probably would have just said, like, stop doing that.

SPEAKER_03 26:56

Like, what are you doing?

SPEAKER_02 26:57

That's not That's a sin. Um, which there's I mean, there is a place for that to be direct. Um, there are times where people need to be like taken by the hand and like, hey, what you're doing is a sin and is destroying your life. And let me help you get out. You know. But you need discernment to know is it a time to for grace or is it time for truth?

SPEAKER_03 27:19

When I was in high school, I would try to, you know, be so bubbly and you know, we gotta love the Lord, we gotta go to church. And I just like, I don't know if I like I don't know how or what, you know, what the deal was with some of the you know, teenagers nowadays, but you know, 10, 12 years ago they were just like, get away from me, I don't wanna know I don't wanna go to your church. And I'm like, But my stepmom's making spaghetti, it's gonna be great. But like there's so many times where you want to love people, and then the other thing too is you have this love for evangelizing to strangers. Yes. My fa so my dad is a pastor and he's writing a new sermon every week, and but and he's you know, he'll tell you that he wants it to be um good enough to it can be for a first-time hearer of the gospel or somebody that's been in church their whole life, that it can be versatile enough to speak, um, that God can speak through it. But he's not the first to say that he wants to go preach the gospel on the street or uh necessarily witness besides his behavior and his love and his graciousness towards people. Because, you know, you can get mad at customer service on the phone, or you can throw a fit if a waitress messes something, or like the cooks in the back of the restaurant mess up your food. Like those little frustrations, be choosing kindness and love in the the small things is a witness in and of itself, but it's a two sides of the coin. So a pastor who's the most comfortable preaching at the pulpit and inside those four walls, and you know, by all means are great people and a great witness to be kind and loving, but then with you, I see this, you know, exuberance that's like, no, I'm ready to go. Let's tell we're talking to this person. We're talking we're gonna find that person with the blue hat, and we're going to we're praying that we can be a witness to a stranger, and to have the a loving approach makes a big difference. Yes. Because some people don't get that, or they think that if they're speaking the truth, that's what matters. I'm just like, but why why do people care? You know, we we care, we know, we know why they should care, but you have to ask. Um, I don't I hate to say this, but it almost feels like you have to have a good, you know, marketing tactics. Because, you know, you think of it, we have commercials for like Burger King and Mc Wendy's and McDonald's, and we have I I have a point, I promise. So we have commercials for these things, and they'll sell you a cheeseburger and they'll show you that you know it's dripping with grease, and then we got a baconator with the bacon, the mayo, the ketchup, and that you want this. This is gonna change your life. And it's like almost irresistible. So what's your what the things that are irresistible in our faith, it has to be that it has to be that love and that grace and that redemption that will truly change our life and want us to call us to repentance and obedience.

SPEAKER_02 30:30

Yeah, so I uh love um your thoughts on this because yeah, there's two kind of extremes that people do in the evangelism. One is like, I just gonna shout at you and speak the truth um without love, which I don't think is right. And the other extreme is let me just show you God's love through my actions and never tell you the gospel. And that is not the way to go either. People, how will they get saved unless someone tells them? So we have to actually be speaking the truth. Um, but we have to do it with love. So, how do I do that? I have a little phrase that I like to use. So, especially with it's a stranger, you know, people there are people and they think stranger danger, they freak out. You know, I've had people like almost going to anxiety attacks because I just talked to them and um just like in the store, and they just they never used to like people being friendly with them. So I or they think I want something from them or something, you know, so you have to be a little tactful. Um so the phrase I have is you want to go from external to internal to eternal conversation.

SPEAKER_03 31:42

So that's the sound of my brain exploding right now.

SPEAKER_02 31:46

Yeah, so what that looks like is like um external, like, oh my goodness, like uh look at that cute father playing with his kid, isn't that adorable? You know, and you're noticing something in the environment that is similar between you and the other person. Um, but it's not personal. But then once you start to engage in that conversation, you say, Oh, you know, do you have a father like that, or what was your father experience like? And so you're asking a personal question to them, and then you might say, Well, then do you know that there is a heavenly father out there for you? And so you're kind of bridging, and sometimes it's it's strange or it kind of has to happen fast um if you're not gonna see them again, or um if you think you may see them again, you know, you can have that discernment, like, okay, maybe I'm just gonna start with the like external and just build rapport, and then maybe we go out for coffee later, and then I ask them more personal questions, and then after that they call me and somebody's died in their family, and then I share uh the salvation story. So there's different timelines, and you need to know the Holy Spirit, like what he's saying, but the time is short, and I think it is better to lean on just get it all out, help them hear the gospel so that later when they need it, they can they can have know how to have a relationship with God.

SPEAKER_03 33:15

So if that feels a vance for somebody that would be brand new, like they they might be afraid to talk to people in like public. Like I know that I used to argue with my sister um about you know speaking up for stuff and we don't you know oh we don't want to make it awkward or we don't want to do you know talk to people. Um what if that even felt like how do I do that? Like what would be like what would be your very beginner, like evangelism for dummies, like what are you 101. Evangelism 101. What would be like you know, we want to speak the truth, we wanna maybe share God love um that God's love, so what can you say that might you know, would you start with saying, Oh, have a blessed day, Jesus loves you, or like, you know, how can you s get that those wheels turning to continue on that yes level up, you know?

SPEAKER_02 34:04

I I love that. So like, yeah, at the most basic, you know, even saying God bless you. And in the spiritual realm, that does a lot as well for that person, um, whether they know it or not. But saying yes, like, you know, I hope you have a great day. God loves you. And if I don't see you again someday, like maybe I will in heaven or something like that. You know, you can make it short and simple, you know, even just Jesus loves you. Um because it is the love of God that draws us into relationship, and the more that they hear it, the more that their hearts will be opened. So yeah, start with Jesus loves you.

SPEAKER_03 34:44

Yeah, that's so good. Um, and then that might open the door to you know, maybe it could be somebody you would see multiple times, like if it's a waitress at your favorite restaurant or you know, something like that. And um but how many times would you say you have repeat interactions like back in California?

SPEAKER_02 35:03

Yeah, because sometimes if you bring up Jesus right away, people put up boundaries right away and they think things about you um off the bat that are true. You can be so grateful when you're you're trying to I'm trying to create a positive experience, but as soon as you bring up the name Jesus, it's it's honestly, I think there's something spiritual happening and manifesting in them that they don't like the name Jesus. And um because they don't I don't I think it's because they don't understand his love um for them. So I would say definitely um good to say hello, you know, Jesus loves you. But if you can't say that, um start with something just basic, like you are loved. Yeah. Sometimes I would just say that in San Francisco, I'd bring my ukulele, and I I realized when I started to sing like oh Jesus loves you over people, that they would literally turn around and like walk away and get super offended that I just told them Jesus loves you. So I changed it to you are loved. And um, they were able to like receive that. And this one girl, I was at uh Hippie Hill on 420 Easter, actually. It was like Easter, and I was with one of my friends, um same-sex attracted guy that was um seeking God, and so we just everyone was smoking it up, and I brought my ukulele, I wasn't engaging in it. And what happened was this girl with a fox nose came by and I asked if I could sing her a song. And I sang over her, she told me her name, and I sang her name and sang that Jesus loved her, or I sang that she is loved. And at the end I said, So what does your name mean anyway? And she says, It means you are loved. And I was like, No way, God totally sees you. And that's when I brought in God, and then she's like, Oh yeah, my brother's trying to tell me about God all the time, and I said, Well, maybe you know, give it a another thought, because I think he is real and he does love you. So it kind of slowly turned into a more spiritual topic.

SPEAKER_03 37:09

That's amazing. So, like, as you think of different experiences you've had, are there any scriptures that you feel um you r remember over and over again that like kind of are your life verses or something that just comforts you when you're struggling or anything like that?

SPEAKER_02 37:26

Yeah, so my mom, when she's pregnant with me, would pray Proverbs 3, 5, and 6. Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding, but in all you ways acknowledge God and He will make your path straight. So trusting God has always been a big theme in my life um throughout my whole journey.

SPEAKER_03 37:45

That's awesome. Um, is there another example as well that even in recent years that um you might remember that that encourages you when you're when you were on the streets helping um ministering to the um those in need?

SPEAKER_02 37:59

Yes, I definitely needed to trust God for protection um and trust that He is real and it gave me confidence knowing that God was in me. Um one time I was giving hot cocoa to a man and he kind of shook and he I stepped back and he said, What are you afraid of me? And I looked at him and I said, No, you should be afraid of me. I have a living God inside of me. And he kinda was like shocked, like, what? Didn't expect that. So when you walk with authority and I was trusting God to protect me, it gave me confidence to go places I wouldn't typically go.

SPEAKER_03 38:38

Only Teresa putting a grown man in his place. I love that. So like all you know, at the end of the day, like I could just keep asking you questions, and you know, there would be so many different examples of how God has shown up tangibly and giving you these c um, you know, c clues and you know, winks and just you know, smiles and all these things that are so precious that mean a lot to you and end up meaning a lot to other people. If you were gonna tell a somebody listening to this right now that you want to instill for them to just remember and that main takeaway from t um from this conversation, what would you say?

SPEAKER_02 39:18

I would say start talking to God and listen and don't shut down your thoughts too quickly. Because it says we do have the mind of Christ Jesus. And so if you get a thought and it's not trying to kill, steal, or destroy from you or knock you down or accuse you, then I I would say listen to it.

SPEAKER_03 39:40

And as you apply your faith, God's gonna move. What does quiet time look like for you? If you're, you know, waking up and having time with the Lord, um, you said you know, you don't think you don't ask God every day for something like that because that might be kind of exhausting and you don't know what that'll look like all the time, but you know, He's faithful. But what does that look like for you in the everyday?

SPEAKER_02 40:02

Yeah, um I I think I did go from a really, really structured like you have to do this and read this amount and pray this amount of time and things like that, which it can be very helpful to start that way. Um, but as I've kind of grown, it's kind of turned into like, okay, God, how do you want to spend time with me today? Do you want me to just sing to you on my ukulele or do you want me to is there a passage, uh verse that you want me to read this morning? So you let that Holy Spirit guide me.

SPEAKER_03 40:33

Yeah, and you let that that might vary day to day. And you don't have a r that rigidity of that structure, but your heart is focused on God and learning more and more about Him. So as we wrap things up, I just want to thank you so much for um sitting down with me and having this amazing conversation. And you have so many stories and so much to share that I'll probably even ask you to do this again one day. And I um i it was a god thing even to have you um over, and I um appreciate you being here with me.

SPEAKER_02 41:09

Of course. I love it, Michelle. Thank you.

SPEAKER_03 41:12

And everyone else, I want you to remember that this is the a Messi Amen, and God's not waiting for perfect, He just wants you. And I'm really glad you're here, and you can find a devotional to go along with this episode over on my sub stack at Messy Amen Pod, and then I will see you next time.