Reverse Mortgage and Beyond

Avoid Probate Nightmares: Trusts, Beneficiary Deeds & POAs Explained

Cheryl Scheidell Season 1 Episode 10

Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.

0:00 | 24:07

In this episode of Reverse Mortgage and Beyond, host Cheryl Scheidell with Barrett Financial Group sits down with probate real estate specialist Lydia Wheatsma of Next Home Power Realty to break down what families really need to know about probate, trusts, beneficiary deeds, and powers of attorney—and how poor planning can cost families tens of thousands of dollars.

Together, they cover:

  •  What probate is and when it’s required 
  •  Why a will alone does not avoid probate 
  •  The critical role of trusts in protecting families and assets 
  •  When a home can be sold during probate 
  •  Who has legal authority to sign during probate (personal representative / executor) 
  •  The hidden risks of beneficiary deeds 
  •  Why outdated or incomplete Powers of Attorney can create major problems 
  •  Dementia, guardianship, conservatorship, and costly real-life examples 
  •  How proactive planning protects heirs, finances, and peace of mind 

This conversation is a must-listen for homeowners, adult children, seniors, and trusted advisors navigating aging, estate planning, and housing decisions.

📻 Radio Show Connection

Catch Cheryl and Lydia every Sunday on AM 960 The Patriot:

  • Solving Life’s Next Chapter with Lydia Wheatsma — 3:00–3:30 PM
  • Is a Reverse Mortgage Right for You? with Cheryl Scheidell — 3:30–4:00 PM

Host Contact Information

Cheryl Scheidell
Reverse Mortgage Specialist
📞 480-817-4324
📧 cheryls@barrettfinancial.com
▶️ YouTube: @reversemortgageandbeyond
🌐 ReverseMortgageAndBeyond.com

👉 If you enjoyed this episode, please SUBSCRIBE, RATE, and REVIEW Reverse Mortgage & Beyond so more people can discover these meaningful conversations.

Guest Contact Information

Lydia Wietsma
Certified Senior & Probate Real Estate Specialist

📞 Phone: 602-363-1720
📧 Email: lydia@arizonapoweragent.com
🌐 Websites:
➡️ ProbateRealtyHelp.com
➡️ SolvingLifesNextChapter.com

 #ReverseMortgageAndBeyond, #ReverseMortgage, #ProbateRealEstate, #EstatePlanning, #TrustsAndWills, #AgingInPlace, #SeniorPlanning, #HomeEquity, #FinancialEducation, #solvinglifesnextchapter

Cheryl Scheidell | NMLS #886425 | Barrett Financial Group, LLC. | NMLS #181106 | 2701 East Insight Way, Suite 150,
 Chandler, AZ 85286 | AZ 0904774 | NV 5091] OR | TX view complaint policy at barrettfinancial.com/texas-complaint.

Information discussed is for educational purposes only and is not intended as legal, tax, financial, or cybersecurity advice and does not constitute a loan offer or credit decision.. Reverse mortgage programs are subject to eligibility, underwriting, and approval. Loan programs, rates, and guidelines are subject to change. Always consult with qualified professionals regarding your specific situation.

 | Equal Housing Opportunity | Equal Housing Lender | This is not a commitment to lend. All loans are subject to
 credit approval. | nmlsconsumeraccess.org/EntityDetails.aspx/COMPANY/181106 

SPEAKER_00

Welcome to Reverse Mortgage and Beyond, the podcast where we take you inside the world of reverse mortgages. I'm Cheryl Schidell and I have been in the mortgage industry since 2002 and have specialized in reverse mortgages for the past 10 years. We'll cover topics like reverse mortgage basics, purchasing a home, and the myths about reverse. You'll also hear from some trusted referral partners. Let's get started.

SPEAKER_01

Hello everyone, welcome back to Reverse Mortgage and Beyond. I'm your host, Cheryl Schidel with Garrett Financial Group. And just wanted to let you know that I've got past episodes that you can watch about reverse mortgage basics, the uh myths about reverse, how to purchase a home with reverse, but I also have some referral partners in there that I really want you to go back and check out their podcasts as well. And today I have a special guest in, Miss Lydia Wheatsma from Next Home Power Realty. And Lydia and I actually have a radio show on Sundays that I always like to plug. Her show is on. I'm gonna have her tell you about it. She's on at three o'clock on Sundays on AM 960. I'm on at 3:30 AM 960, and it's called Is A Reverse Mortgage Right for You? And you can also go to that podcast to listen to some past episodes as well. So, but today I'm joined with Lydia and I'm gonna have her talk about her background first, and then we're gonna dive into some questions because you know we're gonna talk about probate real estate today. And she's an expert, she works with a lot of families with um fiduciaries and attorneys, and we're just uh get down to the nitty-gritty, the basics, so we can understand how all this works. So give us your background and then we'll start from there.

SPEAKER_02

Okay, so my name's Lydia Wheatsma, and I'm a certified senior and probate real estate specialist. I work with families when they are dealing with probably the worst time of their life when someone has passed and um they have to go through the probate process. So that's what I do. I deal with a lot of attorneys, the probate courts, judges, uh fiduciaries, wealth management companies, things like that. And tell us about your radio show and your book. So so I wrote a book a year ago called Solving Life's Next Chapter. It's all about the stories, probate stories that I've done in the last 20, 23 years.

SPEAKER_01

And stories that people don't even probably think about. Like, oh my gosh, I didn't even know that. Yes, could happen.

SPEAKER_02

Lots of, I've just had a few new ones recently. And um, so out of that book came the radio show Solving Life's Next Chapter. I'm on from 3 to 3:30, right before Cheryl's uh is a reverse mortgage rug for you. 960 a.m. the Patriot. And same thing you can look at past um shows on the ones.

SPEAKER_01

On the website. Yeah, perfect. Good, good, good. Okay, so let's just start with what does probate mean?

SPEAKER_02

Okay, so probate. Now I'm gonna give you a little disclosure. I am not an attorney, but I work with a lot of attorneys, so I know a lot about these things. So when I educate people, I like to tell them that. But um, a probate is when someone has assets that are not in any kind of a trust or document that's written down on who they're gonna be passed to. And so probate is when someone has to pass their assets from their name to somebody else's name.

SPEAKER_01

So it's and and and whether or not they have a will. So you know Correct.

SPEAKER_02

So if they don't have a trust in place, they have to go through probate. Now, some people, especially people in the Midwest and Back East, they do a lot of wills.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

Wills are the written instructions that are in a trust. So yes, you can do a will, but it's still you'll still end up in probate court.

SPEAKER_01

And I tried to explain that to somebody other. I'm like, those are just the instructions.

SPEAKER_02

That's it. That's all they are. And so a trust is um it's kind of the mother load up here. And then under the umbrella, the umbrella, and then under that you have your will, your powers of attorney, your directives, all of your assets. So it kind of encompasses all of it.

SPEAKER_01

And it's telling your adult children, it's telling your your beneficiaries, your close friends, whomever, this is important stuff. This is these are my wishes. That's why I always tell my clients, put my business card in with your important paperwork because when the reverse mortgage comes due, I'm gonna be able to help them out. Yeah. So okay, keep going.

SPEAKER_02

So that's basically what probate is, is when you when that the you have to go to the courts, and literally, if you don't have a trust in place, the judge has to decide who the heirs are, who the, you know, what did this person really want to do with all their assets.

SPEAKER_01

So then we're being proactive and we have this in place, we're actually helping the whole system. Absolutely. The court system. Yes, right? We're helping everybody, but we're being proactive.

SPEAKER_02

And if you have a trust, your your heirs are gonna get more money because you're not having to go through that probate court. So right, because they're gonna pay too. Yes. Yes, the cost, the cost be proactive. Amazing. It's really, I've seen some bad situations. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

So when it comes to selling a home, can a property be sold before probate is completed?

SPEAKER_02

So it can. Um, what a lot of the attorneys have done over the years, at least in my cases, is um they you have to wait for the person that's gonna sign off on everything. So that is a document that you get from the courthouse. It's called a letter of authorization.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

And say you are looking to do that for your family. You would go to the courts and you would say, I, I, I would like to be the person in authority to take care of this estate. Okay. So once they say, okay, put the stamp of approval and say, Yes, you are the one, you wouldn't be the one to sign off on all the documents, the listing documents, the title documents, any banking accounts, things like that.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, okay.

SPEAKER_02

So once you have that letter of authorization, you can we can list the home and it can it it it still may have to go through the probate process. So a lot of times what they'll do is they'll take the funds of the house and they'll put it into an estate, uh, a bank account. Okay. And so nobody touches it until the final judge, you know, has their discussions on who's gonna get what.

SPEAKER_01

Okay. And that's why it's important to have a trust in place. Absolutely. Because you wouldn't have to wait. Because that might be six months to a year after.

SPEAKER_02

Oh, it can be a very long time. And if the family's fighting with each other, it can be even longer.

SPEAKER_01

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_02

So yes.

SPEAKER_01

Oh my gosh. So get along with your your your family member, right? I definitely agree with that. So, so as far as who has the legal authority to sign that it would be the authorization. Okay. Um, so what is the role of the personal representative or executive in the selling? Same thing?

SPEAKER_02

Same thing. So that would be the person in charge of signing off on everybody or everything, I should say. And they would be the ones to make major decisions on, you know, um listing documents and banking information and making sure that the attorneys are getting paid and the taxes are getting paid and the courts are getting paid. Oh gosh. It everybody wants to be the head person, but they don't realize how much work is actually involved in this.

SPEAKER_01

Yes. Well, as a matter of fact, my namesake, Cheryl, um, her brother passed away during COVID. During COVID. Yes. And we're they're still dealing with some steps with all that. So years later. Years later.

SPEAKER_02

Yep. Four or five years later. It's just insane. It is. And unfortunately, the ones that are going to make all the money are the courts and the attorneys. It it really is unfortunate. I mean, they got what they I mean, they got all the stuff, but they're dealing with taxes right now. It's just that's a whole nother and that's the one thing that I always so I always tell people the attorneys will say this as well, but when they start a probate process, you have to do a final tax return for the deceased. And it's basically wouldn't have done that. Exactly. And it's basically a document that the CPA will put together or your tax attorney will put together. And it basically shows the government that they are no longer around. So that that they passed and they're deceased.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

So if you sell a home, say January, February, March, you have to wait a whole nother year for the next tax time to do that tax return from that year.

SPEAKER_01

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_02

So you have to, and I always recommend not dispersing anything once you've gotten until after the taxes are done, because I've had situations where families sell the house and then they distribute everything. And then the next year they have to do the taxes and there's taxes owed. And the person who is the personal representative for documenting everything. Has to go to all the siblings. Hey, need the money. And then they don't have it anymore. So the person who's responsible for paying those taxes is you, the personal representative that distributed everything.

SPEAKER_01

Hopefully everyone was paying attention to that.

SPEAKER_02

Don't distribute until you've done your final statute.

SPEAKER_01

Yes, yes, yes. Or hopefully they're passing towards the end of the year.

SPEAKER_02

Exactly. Or they're selling the house at the end of the year. Correct. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yep. Yep.

SPEAKER_01

Um, here's a big one. Okay. What is the difference between beneficiary deed and a trust when it comes to real estate?

SPEAKER_02

So a lot of people try to avoid probate by putting their home in what's called a beneficiary deed. And some states call it the ladybird deed.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

We in Arizona call it a beneficiary deed. Okay. They're great until they're not. Okay. So they do avoid probate. So, like, say I have a house and I want to put my daughter on as the beneficiary. Okay. So if I pass, it just automatically goes to her and she can do whatever she wants with it. No probate or anything. Okay. What becomes a problem is say I get dementia and now she has to sell the house to put me in a memory care.

unknown

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

She doesn't own it until I pass.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

So if there's no other documents other than that beneficiary deed, then we have to go through the probate courts to do a conservator guardianship.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

So that she can sell my house and take care of all my financial finances.

SPEAKER_01

So the POAs don't even help in that case because she hasn't passed. That's why you have to do the guardianship.

SPEAKER_02

Yes. Yep. Okay. And and a POA is really important. So sometimes that it depends on what the POA, how it's written and how long it's been. So I had a situation years years ago where we were selling a home for someone who had moved into um uh assisted living. Okay. Her husband, they had started um running out of money. So they had just shut their house up and moved into this assisted living three years prior and thought, well, we'll eventually get back there. Well, they never did. Okay. So now they're running out of money. And her husband was starting to have a little cognitive. He still understood, but just there were some issues there. So we found their trust with their POAs, and it was 20 years. Oh my god. I mean, it was a 20-year-old trust with 20-year-old POAs. So I sent the POAs to the title company and said, okay, if something happens to the husband and he cannot sign or doesn't understand what he's signing, can the wife sign on his behalf? Right. And they look through the verbiage and there was not the correct verbiage. So that brings up another point as to get all your documents in over order, but make sure you get them updated every, I'd say two to three years.

SPEAKER_01

Yes, that's what I always say to people. I'm like, when was the last time you had that? Yes. And then also when you're moving from another state to Arizona, they need to see.

SPEAKER_02

Yes. So we in Arizona have, and it's starting to hit other states, but we have a special POA here. So most states have financial and medical powers of attorney. Because we have so much dementia in Arizona, we have mental power of attorney. So what happens is if you have a diagnosis with Alzheimer's or some kind of other Louis body dementia, um, if you have the mental power of attorney along with your medical and financial, you're you're gonna be okay. And I will tell you the the medical field is really starting to hone in on this because my daughter's a trauma nurse. Okay. And um I had a client that moved down here from Colorado. He was him and his wife, his wife actually had early onset of dementia, like in her 60s.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, wow.

SPEAKER_02

So he couldn't deal with her anymore. So they sold their house in Colorado and moved down here to Arizona because his he couldn't care for her, yes, couldn't care for her very well. So so what happened was he came down here because his parents were living down here, 85 years old, they were healthy. Oh my gosh. And so he said, I'm gonna move down to Arizona so you can help me with my wife, right? So it was progressing really fast. So they kept her at home as long as they could, and then they had to move her into a memory care. He gets a call at like midnight saying your wife was brought in because she was being a behavioral issue, which happens a lot with dementia, right? Right, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

So um he cut- probably because they moved and she was disoriented. That's a lot of people. She was like, What is going on? Yeah, this is not familiar to me.

SPEAKER_02

And there's also people don't realize there's over 300 types of dementia. Yeah. So some of them are very um progressive and some of them have a lot of um anxiety with them, and people get it start getting a little um, they start being a little combative. So they won't keep them in the memory care if they're like that. They'll move, they'll take them to the hospital because they can't have people, you know, smack another resident or you know, or go in the room in the middle of the night that so he went to the hospital with the documents he had, which were, you know, what he thought he had correct in Colorado. Well, what happens is sometimes when people are going through this, they either are over-medicated, under medicated, or the medication doesn't work anymore. So on one. So what they'll do is they will put that patient in what's um called a two or three week um evaluation. Okay. They don't take them and leave them in the hospital. They have to put them in a psych ward. And that sounds very harsh, but it really is for the benefit of the patient. Right. So they strip them of their medication. They gotta start with the baseline. So um to put her in that um kind of care and just to take her off the medications and to see, you know, put her back on to get her back up to her normal, you know, place of being place of you know, normal for her. Um, he needed the mental power of attorney, which he did not have. So he had to go to the probate courts. And even though he had all the documents from Colorado, he did not have the right ones for Arizona. So he had to get so he had to go and get a mental power of attorney at the probate court, go through like a smaller version of a conservator guardianship, which cost him five thousand dollars.

SPEAKER_01

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_02

So yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_02

And so he always likes he goes.

SPEAKER_01

And how long did that take to do that?

SPEAKER_02

Um, that one was an urgent situation. So the courts have priorities. And so if it's something like that where they need to put her in like m some sort of mental institution, they'll do it pretty quick. So yeah, they were pretty good about that. And the doctors will sign off on things.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, that's a pretty powerful story. Oh my gosh. And an expensive one. And an expensive one, yes, but but he thought he had done everything right. He thought he did.

SPEAKER_02

And I I actually have another one that we had to go through conservator guardianship, similar situation.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

So I had a couple that um the caregiver, which was the husband, um, had a stroke and his wife had um dementia.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

So they had to um he when he had his stroke, he was actually okay, but um, the doctor said, You can't take care of your wife anymore. And so because of that, we had they had to put her into a memory care.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

And to sell the house, because both of their names were on title as husband and wife, right. So we had to go through a conservator guardianship to sell the house. So what happens was we had to put her into somebody had to pay for it up front. And then um they had to go through the court process to get him to be able to sign off on everything.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, wow.

SPEAKER_02

So what happened was um it cost, it's very expensive. So the person who's getting their rights taken away, they get their own attorney. Okay, it's the courts take that very seriously.

SPEAKER_01

Right.

SPEAKER_02

They're not just willy-nilly taking rights away. Thank goodness. Yes. And they gotta make sure that she really does have a dementia, you know, situation.

SPEAKER_01

Like the diagnosis, yes. Yes.

SPEAKER_02

So she has her own attorney. The husband and a nephew who was gonna help them with the finances had their own attorney, and the courts gave them a um investigator.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

And so the investigator is the one that goes to all the doctors to make sure they get the records correct. Um, they talk to neighbors. Do you think she was in her right mind? You know, things like that. They do all the investigation. Okay. They write up a report, they give it to the courts, and the courts review it and they say, okay, she she will need to be deemed incompetent, and we will take her rights away. And so to go through that process just to sell the house, it cost two attorneys, an investigator, and the probate court. And that was between $30,000 and $40,000 just to go through that process.

SPEAKER_01

And and was that paid for from the people or from the house? Or how did that all? So when we sold the assets, uh yeah, I can't. Yeah, you know, how are people finding $40,000 to pay for that?

SPEAKER_02

When we sold the house, that was paid by from the sale at that point.

SPEAKER_01

So it's like held at escrow or yeah, paid at us.

SPEAKER_02

So we had to pay off the attorneys and everything. Yes. And he had to be go into an assisted living and she had to go into a memory care. So her memory care was gonna cost more money than his. And so what we did with that situation, the attorney split the funds up, even though they weren't divorced, it was like a divorce. Right. So, um, and it was for um, it was for state assistance pre-planning. Right. So they split the funds up. She had her own account, he had his own account, and she went through her funds within about two and a half years, and then they were able to put her on Arizona long-term care policy. So those are some of the things that you have to think about when you don't have a trust in place. If you had a trust in place, they would be able to, the documents of who's gonna take care of someone that has dementia, you know, who's gonna ha what's gonna happen, who's gonna sign off on the documents if both parties can't. All those documents are in that trust.

SPEAKER_01

And you don't have to be in your 60s or 70s to get a trust. People should get them early on and get their PRAs early on.

SPEAKER_02

All of my, I have three daughters, all of them. We got them all done at 18. And here's the reason why you want to do that. And it's really important if you do have an 18 year old year old how to do it. If you're got an 18-year-old going off to college. So what happens if they get in a car and God forbid they're in a car accident and now they're in a coma? Who's gonna make the decision if there's nothing in place? So typically they're gonna go to their parents, mom or dad, right? What if you have a mom who says, I'm not ready to let my daughter go and she's on life support, and the husband goes, I don't want to keep my daughter in, you know, in life support. So now you have a fight between mom and dad. Yes. And um, and it gets even worse if mom and dad are are um divorced.

SPEAKER_01

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_02

So it is good if you have an 18-year-old going off to college or an 18-year-old in general, make sure to get at minimum powers of attorney. Yes. You definitely they can get a trust in place because the trust has all of their information, like do you want a feeding tube? Do you want to be put on life support? Those things are in a trust as well.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

So, and attorneys usually have a a discounted fee for someone who's 18 to say 25. Right.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, that's good. That's good. Yeah. So that's so important, everyone, to just be proactive. And um, let me see. We'll do one more question. And um, let's see, what are the most common mistakes families make during the process?

SPEAKER_02

So a lot of the times um there's a lot of issues that can come up, but I would say probably the biggest issue is not getting the professional help right up front as quick as possible.

SPEAKER_01

Because they think they can do it.

SPEAKER_02

They think they can do it, and you can do a probate.

SPEAKER_01

And when you're saying professional help, are you talking realtors? Are you talking attorneys? Or what are you talking about?

SPEAKER_02

Everything attorneys, CPAs, realtors, right up front. Because you can do a probate on your own without an attorney. Okay. It will take you longer because you don't know how to fill out the documentation.

SPEAKER_01

Forms, yeah.

SPEAKER_02

And so if it gets, if you fill out the documentation and you don't fill it out correctly, the courts will kick it out. So every time you're going to the court, it's costing you money. So even though an attorney can be a little more expensive, it is so worth going to a trusted attorney that you can time and money. Time and money. That's really what it is. Yeah. And I have a I have a handful, two handfuls of attorneys that I have vetted myself that I highly recommend. So you can always reach out to me.

SPEAKER_01

Good, good, good. I am going to ask one more question. What advice do you give families who are struggling emotionally with selling a loved one's home?

SPEAKER_02

So I get that a lot. Um, it it can be hard. So I've had families over the years either do a final party at the house, they invite everybody to earth, they'll do things like that. Oh, I love that. Um, I one time had a daughter who was just her mother was a big uh flower person, garden was really big. We sold the house to an investor, and so I asked the investor, I said, could I take some of those um the um flowers that she's got in that certain area? He goes, absolutely, he goes, we're taking that all down anyway. So I went and I got a really pretty pot and I put a bunch of her mom's bulbs in there. Yeah. And she, we were at Tidal when I gave it to her. She just was just bawling. I go, This is from your mom's garden. So, you know, there's different ways of handling it, but really the quicker you can get the household, and I know it's an emotional thing, but the quicker you can get it done, the faster you can heal. And it really is more about the memories than the actual house itself. And so I always try to tell people, you know, it's it's the fun times you had at the house, it's not the house itself.

SPEAKER_01

Right. So yeah, the house is which is the home.

SPEAKER_02

Right.

SPEAKER_01

And and that being said, with the reverse mortgage also, even though you have 12 months to pay back off the loan, your balance is still going up. So it behooves you to sell faster. Yes. To get that out of the name faster.

SPEAKER_02

It really is. Because the faster you can sell it with a reverse mortgage, the more money the estate will get. Yes, exactly. Exactly.

SPEAKER_01

Well, thank you so much for joining us, Lydia. This we could do another information. I'm happy to have you back because this is a great information. And we'll ask some more questions. I learned a lot today. You know, I told my mom years ago, I'm like, you know what? When I am, if I'm still gone 30 days from now in a coma or something, I'm having a good time. Let me go. But I had to put that in writing. Yes. You know what I mean? I had to put that in writing. Yep.

SPEAKER_02

So um, and then how can people reach you? So my number is 602-363-1720, or they can reach me at lydia at arizonapoweragent.com.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, and I'm Cheryl Scheidel with Barrett Financial. I can be reached at 480-817-4324. My website is ReverseMortgage and Beyond. And I'm so glad you joined us today and look forward to joining us in the future.

SPEAKER_00

Great, thank you. Again, this is Cheryl Scheidel, NMLS number 886425 with Barrett Financial, an equal housing lender. Please remember that loan programs, rates, and eligibility guidelines are subject to change and may vary based on individual circumstances. Nothing discussed in this episode constitutes a loan offer or credit decision. Any examples or scenarios shared are strictly for illustrative purposes. All loans are subject to credit approval and underwriting conditions.