What Can Cain & Abel Teach Us? Biblical Brotherhood Ep.2

Most men have people around them... but very few have real brotherhood.

In this episode of Three in the Fire, we unpack what biblical brotherhood actually looks like through the story of Cain and Abel, and real-life experiences with friendship, accountability, isolation, and spiritual growth.

Most guys don’t need hundreds of friends. They need a few real brothers who know them, challenge them, encourage them, and point them back to God.

If you’ve ever struggled with isolation, surface-level friendships, or trying to carry life alone, this episode is for you.

Like, subscribe, and share this with another man who needs it.

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Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:00

Cain and Abel, the first brothers that are mentioned in Scripture. The first brothers of the whole human race, really. The first case where God accepts one offering but rejects another. First case of one brother choosing God's way, another brother choosing his own. First case of sibling rivalry, first case of jealousy, and the Bible's first case of murder. There's a lot here to unpack. So what lessons on biblical brotherhood can we learn from Cain and Abel? What are the foundations that God lays out for building biblical brotherhood into our lives? And what are the pitfalls he wants us to avoid? I'm Duncan Brandon. Welcome to Three in the Fire. We are so excited to have you with us. Those of you that are tuning in for the first time, welcome aboard. You're just in time. The gank plank is just being drawn up, so you can dash onto the ship and hop onto this thing. Promise it's not going to sink. Jesus is driving the boat, so we're really in really, really good shape. So he is the captain of our salvation. He's the captain of this boat.

SPEAKER_01 1:32

Before we get too far into this thing and dive into our topic for today, I want to welcome back also to the podcast, me compañeros.

SPEAKER_02 1:42

You know, one of these guys, you know, I I I just I just want to say that joining me here in the fiery furnace is one guy who who hasn't tried to murder me, uh, and that would be my my good buddy, Max Mulder. Max, thanks for not doing that. Since we're talking about Cain and Abel today, you knew that was going to come up. At least I'm not aware that she tried to murder me. So I'd have kept it. Pretty under undercover, so so party. Now, this other guy over here, this kind of leery-looking fellow, the dark fellow, the calf, the dark shirt, kind of looming in the shadows. The jury's still out on this guy. So we're not really sure, but he joined us here today, also.

SPEAKER_00 2:20

My dear friend Josh Davis. How's it going, bye? Hey, good. Good to see you guys. How's that for an intro?

SPEAKER_02 2:30

Well, as you can tell, everybody, we are. We're talking about Pain and Abel here. Um, and as we kind of uh set things up here, I want to do a little recap of what we talked about last time, then kind of talk about where we're going. So in our last podcast, that started this biblical brotherhood series for us. Um, we were coming off a manhood series, and we felt like, okay, let's talk about biblical brotherhood now, because that's one of the sources, one of the keys to walking in biblical manhood as Jesus models it for us in scripture. You got to have friends to help you do it. So we did a podcast last time and we talked about um the why really of biblical brotherhood. Why, why we why do we do it to begin with? We looked at Psalm 133, where God talks about how good and pleasant it is that brothers dwell together in unity and how it's like the anointing that flows down Aaron's beard. So we talked about how God is saying there he releases the power of his spirit when guys do brotherhood together. But he also said it was like the dew on Mount Hermon, which watered this arid desert region all over Israel there. So we talked about the refreshment that biblical brotherhood will bring into our lives also when we observe these principles. And we looked at that word good because it was right there at the very beginning in Genesis. It's the same word that when God looked at his creation, he said, that's good, and that's good, and that's good. And started unpacking that crazy definition, guys, of it meant good, it meant beautiful, it meant best, it meant blessed, it meant bountiful. I mean, just like every possible idea that could ever be good was just like thrown into that one word. And then when we come over to Psalm 133, that's the first word that David uses when he starts talking about it. And of course, David wouldn't kind of know a little bit about biblical brotherhood too, I think. So that was our first installment. And today we're coming to our second installment. So we're gonna be talking now, not about the why, but about the what. Okay. What is biblical brotherhood really made of? Okay. And when we when we do this, it it's always important. If we want to look at foundations, we want to start where the Bible starts on it, and that's with the story of Cain and Abel. There's just a ton that is packed into this story. Um, we and most people, I think in general, you guys might agree, probably have a general familiarity. If you mention Cain, everybody knows, oh yeah, he's the guy who whacked his brother, and and then Abel, but he might not be well as well known. It's kind of like we have the shows about murderers and all of that, and the serial killers and so forth, and and and don't really mention or remember the victims and so forth. But Abel was that other brother, and there's there's so much that we can learn from them. But as we were getting ready for this podcast, guys, I asked you uh to kind of go back into your own personal stories. Because we we all here in this circle have guys in our past that have been an able to us, and that being somebody whose walk with God was strong and vibrant, really sold out on him. Um, love, love, a lover of people, a tender of people. You know, Abel incidentally was a shepherd. So he he kind of had this way about relationship and love with him and so forth. Um, and obviously he was a passionate God worshiper because he's bringing this offering to God. And it's it's the firstborn of his flock, which is a real strong biblical principle for bringing your best to God. So I asked you to maybe one of you guys to maybe find an able in your life, somebody who's really kind of called you up in your faith. And then I asked, you know, you guys to maybe think about a Cain, somebody who was that opposite. Maybe he had it in for you. He he hated you and might not have been as a parent at first, you know, kind of like Cain talking his brother out into the field and then and then he got whack. Um, but we've all had those. We've had an Abel and we've had a Cain, somebody who did us right, and somebody who maybe really did us wrong, wounded us in some way, you know, did something that was just murderous to our soul. We've all experienced that. And we've especially experienced it as guys if we've tried to walk in biblical brotherhood for any length of time, because we're gonna run into this thing called sin that's inside of all of us. Um, as much as we want to be filled with God's spirit as believers, we still got our sin nature we got to deal with. And so as we start to unpack this, I think one of the things we're gonna learn is there's a little bit of cane and there's a little bit of able in all of us. And we want to tease out the cane there and push down the able. So, guys, which one of you wants to go first and kind of present your example of of your cane and and your able? I'll I'll toss it out here to you. Who wants to go first?

SPEAKER_00 7:28

I'll do it. I'll maybe go with good, good first, no. Um, yeah, you know, Max and I were were chatting briefly about this before uh before we recorded. And there's like so many guys that I could I could probably um uh talk about because I've just been blessed and fortunate enough to have so many mentors um over the years and over my adult life and through through all the different seasons of life that I've been through. Um and um but when I think of of maybe um who's most impactful uh right now, you know, I think about um what you know, over the last 10 years, just being involved with Quest and Ministry, ministering to men and and coming back and serving on those events, and just the the men that I've uh come to know and that have become close friends that have walked with me um over the last 10 years, and just how all those things that um that serving in that capacity in that place and doing quests and doing um it just it affects every area of your life. Those uh uh because really it's walking out biblical principles in for in, and that's what the event is, but um you every time you go, you are sharpened, um, refined, and God grows you, stretches you. It's an opportunity to step into your giftings and in your calling and and just all of these things. It's just an amazing environment for that. Um But over the over that 10 years, there's been guys that have pulled me further along, I think, you know. And when I think about where I'm at now and the stuff I'm going through and the season of life I'm in and the challenges and everything that I'm facing, um you know, I can see how God has used used that to equip me for the challenge. And so um, you know, I really think um just as you were talking and and I continue to think on who who that is, if I I really feel like it would be um uh probably Gene Carter, who you guys know really well. Um coach, as we affectionately call him. Uh because he's he's really a guy that is, I mean, he he is a coach. He was a coach. He everything about him is a coach. And so when he sees players, when he sees guys, sees things inside of them that they don't necessarily see themselves. And a good coach sees those things and calls those things out and he looks those players, right? Um, and even challenges them to the extent that maybe they get frustrated, right? Like you've got a talented quarterback and you want him to become the leader of your team, and you want him to perform uh at the the level that you know he's capable of. So you're gonna push buttons and you're going to call things out and you're gonna challenge him. Um, but you're also gonna put your arm around his shoulder and you're not gonna give up on him and you're gonna walk with them through those challenges and those difficult things. And so I think about somebody like him for sure in my life over the last um, you know, five, six, seven years, um, as he's walked with me um and just in life in general, but even in ministry-wise, because he he has grown me in that ministry and been an advocate for me and and got me, you know, trained. He he trained me um for the role that I'm in now. There you go. Um, you know, he's he's someone for sure that um that is is an amazing role model, an example um on how to love people, treat people, uh, you know, just he's so relational, right? And we're talking about brotherhood, it's relational. And so uh for me, it's just a great example of what of what that should look like, how we should live in relationship with with other guys. And I guess you could say he enabled you. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 11:52

Yeah, but um, we're all week. You share tip your waiters. Um so okay, so Josh, if you did the able, which is I think is the easier one, that's kind of the copy really.

SPEAKER_00 12:04

Um but Josh got the easy one, Max. Well, who's Max gonna put on blast now? We're just gonna catch some strays. Right, right.

SPEAKER_02 12:14

And we don't have and we don't have and we don't have to use names on this one, Max. That's the negative example.

SPEAKER_00 12:20

It's so obvious. The two of you, it's the two of you dropping dragging me down to hell. I'm sorry. Oh, yeah, everybody said oh me.

SPEAKER_02 12:30

Um so so you had you had the cane example here, yeah, Max. And we talked about how, okay, so Josh gets enabled, you get caned. Um talk talk about talk about your example and and what this looked like in your life, Max. There was a guy that I came in contact with. Um, it was about probably about 10 years ago. And uh I met him through a civic organization, and we got to know one another. And he was he's the personality where he was always, you know, trying to tell you a joke and and trying to be uh the funny guy. And I I I looked past that. But the thing that was the the detriment was that this guy would send me probably at least two or three times a week. He would send me a text, and attached to the text would be a link, and the link would be to some pornographic site. Now, I never I never invited it. I never said, hey, uh, do you are are you looking at any good porn? We we never had that kind of discussion. So so he made the I'm really glad by the way. Okay. He made the assumption, and and this really, you know, I guess causes you to do some introspection, which was why does this guy feel like he needs to send this to me? So and and so they'll know in the story, I I asked him, I said, hey, blank, fill in the name. Um you don't need to send me the the the text that you're sending me. I I'm I'm I'm good. I don't I don't need that. And so it only um it slowed down, it did not go away. Now here's the part that's telling on me, okay, was that he he was so consistent in that that at one point in time it got to the place where uh when I saw that he had sent me a text, it it was a almost like a trained response in me, because I knew there was gonna be there was gonna be something attached to that that I shouldn't look at. But, you know, I just opened it and it was on there, you know, this the same stupid example that many times men will use to rationalize their their their sin. And I got to the place where uh I knew that he had sent me, he would have sent me that text and that it would have a uh uh a treat attached to it, so to speak. And I then realized, you know what, man, this guy is he's taking me the wrong direction. So I literally, I literally had to block him off of my phone, and I had to block him, and he would see me at the meetings of the civic organization, and um, and he would, he would comment, hey, did you hated you? And I I said, you know what? No, man, um, I I don't want you to to send that stuff to me anymore. I I don't need that. He became, he got offended that, you know, is hey man, I'm just you know, sharing uh a little of the stuff that's out there. And I said, I for me, man, I I don't need it. And I don't want it. And the the the truth of the matter was is that my my mind had become accustomed and was getting trained. It was almost like Pavlov's dog, right? Is like if whenever that text would come in, I knew that there was something there and that I needed to, I needed to eliminate it. I needed to delete it. But initially it was, well, let me just see if this one, you know, if if this has, if this is gonna be, you know, pornography, or maybe he's sending me something else that's funny. It was never so there wasn't a label attached to anything. No, it was just a link. Yeah. Yeah. And this was before, you know, you got a sh plus deposit of what it was going to be. And yeah, so a thumbnail always didn't come with it at this time. It was always perverse. It was always. And so eventually just came to the place where I had to go, okay, I gotta, I gotta separate myself from this guy. I'm not saying then to say that I was stellar because I wasn't. Because I endured I endured it too long. I I allowed him to send it to me for too long until it finally Holy Spirit convicted me of, hey, you're you're not you know, you're not making friends here by accepting this this smut basically and this junk into your life. It's not helping you at all. And I think, not to minimize the the my stance in this, but I do think that most men try to find a way, we try to find a way to rationalize being drawn down instead of like Josh talking about coach, coach is is is pulling him up, right? He's he's encouraging him to to go higher. This guy was not, right? He's like, hey, join me here in the depths. And because it involved this stimulation, it was like, well, I can't, you know, these guys sending it to me. I have to open it. No, no, you don't. No, you don't. So, so so with so with this, yeah, the the initial thing obviously is yeah, you want we want to try as men to to be the Christ influence in a guy's life that obviously needs it. And so you you're looking for those opportunities. Okay, well, when can I get a word in here? He he's trying to seed me, obviously. So, you know, I don't want to immediately shove him out because of where he's at. Yeah, he's a sinner, he's lost. Hello. Yeah, he needs the gospel. So I don't want to have to cut this arm off. I don't want to have to cut this relationship off, you know. So I I can understand the initial wrestling there at first of just going, you know, okay, well, I'm just gonna try to just shove it away, keep it away, and then when I see him be a positive influence as I can and hope that you know his heart opens up and so forth. But yeah, it it does bring up a great point of where eventually we have to, like I believe Paul deals with 1 Corinthians, I believe it's about the 11th chapter, 30, 33rd verse, where he says, you know, hey, um, you know, do not be deceived, evil communications corrupt good morals, as he as he quotes one of the poets there. And so that's that's one of these those evidences there where, yeah, this guy was clearly a Cain in your life. And okay, well, he he he has no intent on changing, he has no interest in the light, no interest in Jesus or the gospel. And his only interest really is to pull me down, even though I said don't send it to him, and don't send it to me, you know, a couple of times. So good examples there, guys. Um so transitioning now to jump in on our study here, we're gonna be going to Genesis 4, 1 through 11, where the story of Cain and Abel is at. If anybody wants to join us out there, open your Bibles there. Genesis 4, 1 through 11. And while you're going there, I'll just mention this again. I said at the top of the broadcast here that this chapter, this passage is filled with a lot of firsts. And I like to throw out little tools like this every once in a while because it makes us sharper. And the tool I want to throw out to our audience here is called the law of first mention. It's an observation we really have in theology, the law of first mention. And what the law of first mention states, basically, is that the first time something appears in scripture, God is giving us a basic foundation, a basic framework for understanding that thing that He's talking about. And as we continue to move forward into the deeper revelation of Scripture, as we start reading further, God only adds to that. He doesn't take anything away. He he's already laid the foundation, he's already poured it, and so forth. So now the rest of scripture is just kind of building out the rest of the house, adding color, adding nuance, adding situations, scenarios, things like this, and other little principles. But this is that first case of biblical brotherhood for the positive and for the negative here. And so we're gonna jump in now to our text and and and take a look at that, and then we'll start to unpack this. So Genesis 4, 1 through 11, guys, is where we're at. Now Adam knew Eve, his wife, and she conceived and bore Cain, saying, I have gotten a man with the help of the Lord. And again she bore his brother Abel. Now Abel was a keeper of sheep, and Cain a worker of the ground. And in the course of time, Cain brought to the Lord an offering of the fruit of the ground. And Abel also brought of the firstborn of his flock and of their fat portions. And the Lord had regard for Abel and his offering, but for Cain and his offering he had no regard. So Cain was very angry, and his face fell. The Lord said to Cain, Why are you angry? And why is your face fallen? If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do Not do well, sin is crouching at the door. Its desire is for you, and you must rule over it. So Cain spoke to Abel, his brother, and then some versions here add this little piece, let us go out to the field. That's not in the the earliest uh text that we have. But Cain spoke to his brother, he gets Abel to go out to the field with them, and when they were in the field, Cain rose up against his brother Abel and killed him. Then the Lord said to Cain, Where is Abel your brother? He said, I do not know. Am I my brother's keeper? And the Lord said, What have you done? The voice of your brother's blood is crying to me from the ground, and now you are cursed from the ground, which has opened its mouth to receive your brother's blood from your hand. And there you go. First brotherhood in Scripture, and it ends in tragedy. What strikes me first here, though, guys, about this is the place where the where the division begins, because it should have been a point of unity. The division begins when Cain, and it's Cain who starts the whole thing. Cain is he's gonna bring an offering to the Lord. Okay, great. He's gonna worship the Lord. He's gonna bring him an offering of his stuff. And Abel's like, hey, I want to do that too, and I'll bring an offering as well. So this thing that should have been something that unifies the brothers becomes the very thing that starts this division. But as the story unfolds, we we we start seeing other stuff going on inside of Cain too. But I think it brings up the first point here for us, and that is that the first foundation of biblical brotherhood is the will of God. This whole thing starts with an offering. And what I think it starts to reveal to us as we start looking at some of the other scriptures that start to kind of describe what's going on is that Abel approaches God. He brings an offering that is in line with a pattern that God's already established. It's something that God's already asked for concerning offerings. And Cain, Cain decides he's going to try to do his own thing here. And so God accepts Abel's offering. He rejects Cain's offering. The scripture says he has regard for it. And so literally, God looks at Abel's offering and he's like, that's a pleasing offering to me. He looks at Cain's offering, he says, that's not a pleasing offering. And some theologians have divided on this, and they said, well, it's it's because um uh Cain doesn't bring his best. Well, it doesn't really say that. It doesn't really say he didn't bring his his his best fruits or his best vegetables or anything like that. It makes the distinction that Abel brings firstborn lamb. Cain doesn't. Cain says, I'm gonna bring fruits and vegetables. This is what I do. And and so there's almost this inherent attitude already of, this is what I do, and it ought to be good enough. Now the pattern's already been established though through mama and dad. When Adam and Eve fall into sin in the garden and say, and they look at each other and you know, hey, we didn't come out and talk to you, God, because we were naked. And God starts having the conversation. Well, before that conversation's over, he has made the first animal sacrifices to clothe their nakedness. And so that pattern of sacrifice is now established. God sacrifices, and and I tend to believe that it was a lamb there also, although the scripture doesn't specify. I believe it was a lamb because as we go forward into Exodus and all of the rest of the Old Testament, we know that that's the premier offering that's going to, you know, portend the coming of Jesus one day as the Lamb of God in the New Testament. So we've got this thing that's dividing them, the will of God and this offering. But there's some other insights that scripture kind of gives us in Hebrews 11:4, it says, By faith, Abel offered to God a more acceptable sacrifice than Cain, through which he was commended as righteous. So there it is. He offers a sacrifice and God declares him righteous because of the sacrifice that he offers. And he command he accepts his gifts. And so we know that the righteousness is going to have to come through an offering that's acceptable, and God's established the pattern. So I think that's kind of our first clue. But in um the book of the book of 1 John, God kind of picks up on this theme also. And in chapter 4, starting at verse 11, it says, For this is the message that you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another. Verse 12 says, We should not be like Cain, who was of the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own deeds were evil and his brothers were righteous. So he's not talking about the deed of murder. We know that's evil. But he says, Why did he murder his brother? Because Abel's brother Abel's deeds were righteous. Cain's deeds were not righteous before God. So I think it really does hinge in on that. But one more scripture that that falls into place here, and I think really kind of makes the case for us, is Jude 11. Jude is talking about false prophets, and he's giving warning signs of when false prophets show up on the church's doorstep at that time. And he's describing them, and in verse 10, he says, But these people, they blaspheme all that they don't understand, and they are destroyed by all that they, like unreasoning animals, understand instinctively. Strong language there. And then he says, This woe to them, for they walked in the way of Cain, and they abandoned themselves for the sake of gain to Balaam's error and perished in Korah's rebellion. So he actually takes now Cain's example and he makes it like this case thing, and he says, that's called the way of Cain. He describes a guy who's trying to approach God on his own terms, self-righteousness, and says, that's the way of Cain. And so I think what ultimately divides the brothers here is Abel, he follows the will of God. Cain does not. And so instead of that being the unification point, it becomes a division point. Thoughts, ideas, comments here so far? You you may, you, you might be getting to this direct uh to this other aspect, but the you know, the response that that Cain gives to God when he asks him, What have you done? And he says, you know, what am I my brother's keeper? That was that response also really points towards, I mean, there's there's sarcasm in it, right? And in that sarcasm, there is, um, you know, I don't, I don't care. And and his his unwillingness to follow what God wanted him to do, right? That enables his sacrifice was was in accordance to what God was seeking. And not so much that a that Cain's sacrifice was bad, it just wasn't what God was seeking. And it it's it's kind of a withholding, if you will, is that Cain, you used the the phrase a moment ago, it's good enough. This is what I do, so this is good enough, right? And and and really that that's not what God's asking. He's not asking that of them, and he's not asking that of us. And so in that regard, it seems to me that Cain just has a an outlook that is at the very least rebellious, right? Um and and probably at the most, uh very um very yeah, he has some he has an issue of pride there. Um, and it seems like it it's it's he received it, he he received it from mom and dad pretty well, I would say. I I I don't know if it is uh I don't know if that's completely accurate, but from his response, it seems to me that he had there's there's attitude in there. And that attitude, I think, comes from that rebellion in his heart. What do you think, Josh?

SPEAKER_00 30:30

No, I think what Max said, I think he's he's on the right track. I mean, just that just his his response reveals a lot more about I think his overall attitude and lack of character and just doesn't honor God, um respect God's authority. Uh in and so I think that that reveals a lot. I think Max is on the right track.

SPEAKER_02 30:59

Yeah, I I do. I I I tend to think that this that the will of God, this is the first, you know, plank or the first point of of foundation for for biblical brotherhood. You've got to have two guys that are after the same thing. If you're both after the will of God, you're heading towards Jesus. You're heading towards his word. You're you're desiring the same thing that he that he desires. And the an interesting scripture here that goes right hand in hand with our topic. I know you've read this a dozen times, but Jesus made this statement in Matthew 12, verses 48 through 50. He's been standing here teaching the crowd, and a guy walks up to him just kind of out of nowhere. Scripture doesn't say who the guy is, and kind of tugs Jesus' robe sleeve, I guess, and and says, Hey, your your brothers and your sister and your mother are out here and they want to have a word with you. And Jesus gives this answer that if we kind of read it at first, it it almost kind of it's almost kind of cringy because you're like, Well, why did he say that? Because the guy's like, hey, they're they're they out here and they want to talk to you. And Jesus, stretching out his hands towards his disciples, you know, he's he replies to the man, he said, he looks at the man he says, Who are my mother? Who is my mother? And who are my brothers and sisters? And you got the you got to think the guy sitting here going, um, those people that I just told you, they're here to talk to you. It's just a quick question. What an what did I mean? I'm just the messenger, don't shoot me, you know. But then he goes, he stretches out his hands and he goes, Look, let me show you. Whoever does the will of my father in heaven, that's my mother, that's my sister, that's my brother. And so Jesus himself sets that standard here and says, Yeah, if you want to have actual spiritual family, which was what God's vision was from the beginning. It's not good that man should be alone. We're gonna have spiritual family, we're gonna have this thing. Well, there's gotta be something that binds it together. We've got to be after the same thing. We've got to be after God's will. Otherwise, we don't have that. We don't have brothers, we don't have sisters. This goes for gals too. They're listening. It's it's for everybody brothers, sisters, spiritual fathers and mothers, spiritual sons and daughters. It's gotta hinge on the will of God.

SPEAKER_00 33:18

So it makes me the the verse that uh pops into mind for me is Amos 3.3. Can two walk together unless they agree? And there he goes on, it goes on to tell you that no. Uh you know, so you can't walk together unless you're in agreement. And so if you if you're not in agreement on on the will of God and the and uh and the righteousness or righteousness of God, then you can't really walk together. You can't walk together in brotherhood.

SPEAKER_02 33:46

Yeah, you can't. The first scripture that I think of when I really start thinking about the will of God um is the prayer of Jesus in Gethsemane. You know, he's sweating great drops of blood, you know, Luke points out in his account of it. But what is it centered around? It's centered around doing the will of God. Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me, nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will. It's this this Greek word thalema, um, it's used as a verb throughout the New Testament, also. But here's here's Jesus, and it's the plan of redemption for crying out loud, okay? It's kind of important. And so Jesus is wrestling for the very will of God to be done in our behalf so that we can actually become his brothers further down the line here. But we get to, we start seeing this tension that if we're going to do the will of God, we know as men, it's going to lead to tough decisions. And not everybody's going to be willing to go there with us when we do make those decisions either. There, there's going to be a Cain response sometimes, and then there's going to be able responses and others that go, yeah, that's what I want too. Let's do it. Let's do it right now. So I think that's really important. That's Matthew 26 for those that are taking notes there, 39 through 40. Um, I want to I want to go a little bit further on our on our time here uh and just offer up just a couple more scriptures here that I think are just that are really, really important here for us on the subject. So we looked at Jesus there. John mentions one here also. Um, and it's another statement from Jesus. He's been talking about the resurrection and about people who he's gonna you know raise up at the last day who have believed in him. And he says in verse 30, John 5 and verse 30, he says, I can do nothing on my own. Check that out. I can do nothing on my own. As I hear, I judge, and my judgment is just, because I seek not my own will, but the will of him who sent me. That's what I'm after. And so if you're after that as a man, again, there's gonna be those that I'm not after that. That's not what I'm seeking. And that'll be a division point, a Cain and Abel point for you, I think. Um, let's do, let's do a couple more here. 1 Corinthians 7, verses 36 and 37, Paul's talking about uh marriage. And he's talking about, you know, hey, he says, he's throwing out the idea, hey, if it's better if you if if you're not married because you can focus your life on serving God, but hey, if you if you have a have somebody that you're espoused to, and you know, it's a good relationship, you know, it's a God-honoring relationship and so forth, you're not doing wrong if you want to if you want to be married to this person. But watch how he words it here. He says, Whoever is firmly established in his heart, being under no necessity, but having his own will, his own desire under control, and has determined this in his heart to keep her as his betrothed, he will do well. So he's now he's talking about wrestling against your own desires, wrestling, having to wrestle against lust as premarital sex, okay, having to wrestle against adultery. These things that are bosom sins for a lot of guys out here. This whole chapter, 1 Corinthians 7, is all around marriage and adultery and fornication and what's acceptable with God and what isn't. And so I think it's so important for us to understand as we kind of lay out this this first piece of the foundation of biblical brotherhood that that the will of God is that piece. It's that first piece, and there's always going to be tension around it. And you'll have to look at your relationships on an individual basis. And then, like you guys kind of did, Max, you had to assess, I tried to maintain this relationship, but I couldn't. I had eventually had to cut it off because this guy, he's not just hanging out, he's deliberately trying to pull me down.

unknown 38:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 38:05

And Josh, on the vice versa of that, your able relationship, this is this is a guy who's clearly pulling you up. And so you're like, man, I'm gonna lean into that. So closing thoughts that you want to share here. I I you you just mentioned that inside of that brotherhood uh relationship, there's gonna be times where there's gonna be tension. And and we we see that in another verse where iron is sharpening iron, right? As one man sharpens another. And when iron is sharpening iron, it's it's not polishing, it's not shining it up. It is making it sharp, but there's heat and there's friction and there's that tension. And a lot of sparks. Yeah. Yeah. And we shy away from it going, man, what's going on with that? But that is how brotherhood is developed, is in the fire, so to speak, right? And so I think it's important to note that if if you're developing a a brotherhood and there seems to be tension or there seems to be some friction, it might be good because it it might be knocking the burrs off of you that need to come off, right? Maybe this it's maybe the same thing for the other guy as well, but certainly looking at what's the benefit for me here. Is it is it making me better, draw, calling me higher, right?

SPEAKER_00 39:27

I mean, Josh, closing thoughts? Uh yeah, you know, just which what you talked about, what m what Max just talked about, um, makes me think about um the uh the verse in um 2 Corinthians 6 14 where it talks about to not be yoked together with um unbelievers. Like that popped in my mind because I feel like that verse is used so much when you're talking about dating and marriage, not so much in terms of brotherhood and friendships. Yeah. You know what I mean? And so um, you know, I think I think that's just a a reminder again, going back to Amos three, can two walk together unless they agree. You need to be in agreement that that uh the will the will of God and and the pursuit of of what God says is righteous, you know, like that needs to be just like we talk about in marriage, like, oh, you know, I need to per I I God needs to be number one for me, needs to be number one for her, we're gonna pursue God together. I mean it's the same thing with with true, genuine um friendships, you know, um with uh, you know, just like you know, the three of us, right? Like uh we we are um you know what what God says is right, um God has you know God has the final say and the final word and and we're all per in pursuit of of God and and his righteousness. And um and so we're in agreement on that, and we're walking together in agreement on that, and we're not unequally yoked in that. Um so I don't know, that that verse just popped into my mind is is you know, we just for me, I feel like it's it's always thought of in terms of of the marriage relationship, not as much the friendship relationship.

SPEAKER_02 41:23

Yeah, it absolutely fits right here though. Um, you know, Psalm 1, David says, Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly, stands in the way of sinners, or sits in the seat of the scornful, but his delight is in the law of the Lord and on his law. He meditates day and night. And then he'll be like a tree planted by rivers of water. He goes on and on here, but he makes a point. Okay, it there's the will, that's not the will of God over there, sitting in the seat of the scornful, walking in the counsel of the ungodly. That's not God's will. And so this is a great, uh, great point for a great uh moment here for us to kind of put a bow on this for today. Um, guys out there, we want to encourage you, gals too, take a look at your relationships. Look at those relationships that are calling you up, that are calling you further into kingdom, that create that type of able response in you that you want there. Um, and tend to those things, lean into those things like David's talking about, like Paul's talking about, like John and all these other guys are talking to us about in scripture. And watch out for those Cain influences, those ones that are gonna are gonna pull you down and pull you away from God's will. The one, the one thing over here, we want to be after the will of God. And if we do that, we can build some amazing relationships and they can become incredible blessings in our lives and the lives of others. And that's gonna wrap us up here today. Y'all, thank you for joining us. Remember, please, if this podcast is blessing you, please be sure to like, share, and subscribe. Help us get the word out about what's going on at Three in the Fire.

SPEAKER_01 43:01

Tell your brothers, tell your sisters, tell your dogs, tell your cats, tell Everett, tell your mailman, stop him, tackle him, tackle the Amazon mailman. Hey, I gotta tell you about three in the fire.

SPEAKER_02 43:11

Okay, let them know what's going on here, and we will see you next time. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Time out there. Hey, before you go, if this blessed you, if this has spoken to you, please give us a like below. Click that little thumbs up right there, share, and subscribe. We need you guys to help us get the word out about what's going on here at Three in the Fire.