Accepting Your Parents and Practicing True Faith

In this message, we reflect on the spiritual importance of accepting and honouring parents, even when there are wounds, differences in faith, or painful memories. Using Scriptures such as James 1:19, 2 Kings 5:18–19, John 1:12, Matthew 15:3–6, and 1 Timothy 5:4, this episode calls believers to practise faith at home through honour, mercy, wisdom, and love. It is a prayerful encouragement for anyone struggling with parental acceptance or family honour.

Transcript

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Majority is not only in how deeply we pray, but in how kindly we honor the people God used to bring us into this world. Faith should not make us less loving. True faith teaches us how to obey God without dishonoring our parents and how to obey our parents without dishonoring God. Good morning and welcome to this episode of Igniting Your Day. This morning, everything that was placed on my heart is centered on one subject, which is praying for everyone around us who finds it difficult to accept their parents. I do not know what might have gone wrong. I do not know the experiences, the wounds, the disappointments, or the history behind it, but there are people around us who are finding it hard to accept their parents. What was shown to me is this honoring parents begins with accepting them. A parent you do not accept, you cannot truly honor. And I believe that if we did not need this message, the Lord would not have brought it to our attention. Honoring parents begins with accepting them, and the Lord is calling us to pray for everyone who at this moment finds it difficult to accept their parents. There are a few things that I was helped to see, and we will look at them carefully. First, we will consider what lack of acceptance looks like. Then we will consider some of the reasons behind it and we will pray through them. What does lack of acceptance of parents look like? Number one, always picking holes in what your parents say. One of the first signs of lack of acceptance is that you are always picking holes in what your parents say. Your father is no longer intelligent to you, your mother can no longer say anything that makes sense to you. When they are speaking, you are not really listening. You are already seeing gaps, you are already seeing faults, you are already irritated. They may tell you things that are not totally correct or totally reasonable according to your present private context, but instead of receiving what is useful, you become irritated by what was said. Let me draw your attention to what the Bible says in James chapter 1, verse 19. The Bible says, Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath. This is important, friends, because when dealing with parents, many people are no longer quick to listen. They are quick to react, they are quick to argue, they are quick to become angry. When we were growing up, people said our generation, that is the millennials, that we are somehow difficult. But have you looked at the generation behind us? Many of them think they know everything. They are often very theoretical in their approach to life. Yet, when a parent speaks from experience, they sometimes dismiss it because it does not fit the theories they have learned. We must pray for our children, we must pray for young people, we must pray for everyone around us who is struggling in this area. Let them be quick to listen. Let them be slow to speak. There is a spirit of irritation that makes people unable to receive sound counsel. It may be in children towards their parents, it may also be in people towards those who operate in parental roles in their workspaces, ministries, or communities. If this irritation is not addressed, they will never be patient enough to receive what is being taught. What their parents are saying may not look excellent according to their personal context, but there may still be life in those words. So we pray this morning: Lord, our children will be quick to listen, they will be slow to speak, they will be slow to become angry, they will not be irritated by sound counsel. Our children will not be irritated when sound counsel is given to them in the name of Jesus. Amen. Secondly, difficulty associating with your parents. Another sign of lack of acceptance is difficulty associating with your parents. There are people who are uncomfortable being seen with their parents. There are people who distance themselves from their parents because of differences in faith, differences in background, differences in lifestyle, or differences in understanding. For example, when you're on holiday visiting your parents, do you completely separate yourself from everything that concerns them? Some people have parents who are of another faith, some have Muslim parents who have not given their lives to Christ. Some people think that going to celebrate Eid with them means they are now serving another God. But no, you are not there because you are serving another God. You are there because you are honoring your parents. I was reminded of the story of Naaman in 2 Kings chapter 5, verse 18 to 19. The Bible says, teaches us there rather that after Naaman was healed, he believed in the God of Israel, yet he knew that because of his official duty, he would still have to accompany his master to the temple of Remon. Naaman said this, in this thing the Lord pardon thy servant. That when my master goeth into the house of Remon to worship there, and he leaneth on my hand, and I bow myself in the house of Remon, when I bow down myself in the house of Remon, the Lord pardon thy servant in this thing. And he said unto him, Go in peace. That is, Elisha said unto Naaman, Go in peace. Elisha did not give Naaman a long rebuke. He did not force Naaman to separate himself immediately from his official responsibilities. He simply said, Go in peace. This does not mean compromise. It means that spiritual life sometimes requires wisdom. There are situations where you must honor without bowing. There are situations where you must love without compromising. And there are situations where you must be present without surrendering your worship to another God. This leads us to 2 Timothy 1, verse 7. The Bible says, For God hath not given us the spirit of fear, but of love, of power, and of a sound mind. I believe one reason many people find it hard to associate with their parents, especially when their parents of another faith is fear. They are afraid that honoring them will mean surrendering their convictions. But God has not given us the spirit of fear, He has given us power, love, and a sound mind. The fact that you honor your parents does not mean you are serving another voice. You can love and not bow, you can honor and not compromise. So we pray for everyone around us who is finding it hard to accept their parents because their parents are not born again, or because they think they have a higher quality of faith. We pray that every wall between parents and children be broken down. Children will love their parents again, they will honor their parents without compromising their faith in the name of Jesus. The third thing is this: being uncomfortable asking parents for advice or help. Another sign of lack of acceptance is that you are no longer comfortable asking your father or mother for advice. What many people do not know is that asking your parents for advice gives them a conviction that you still accept their competence in that area. And when they advise you, please let them know that you have made good use of the advice they give you. No matter how irrelevant their submission may seem in your personal context, there is something about their words that the scripture testifies of. The Bible says in Proverbs chapter 4, verse 20 to 22, My son, attend to my words, incline thine ear unto my sayings, let them not depart from thine eyes, keep them in the midst of thine heart, for they are life unto those who find them, and health to all their flesh. Friends, their words may not show you the most profitable mutual funds to invest in, but their words can give life to those who find them. Their words may not be able to tell you 10 tips for you to get promoted in your office, but their words can still be life to those who find them. Their words may not tell you the most profitable place to buy land in the city where you live, but their words can still carry life. Let it not be that people who are not related to your parents are enjoying the benefits of their words and wisdom, while you, the one they give birth to, are languishing in pain and dishonor because you refuse to receive anything from them. So we pray. Help our children, our teenagers, our young adults to see value in the words of their parents. Let them not despise what can give them life in the name of Jesus. Amen. Now let's look at what causes this lack of acceptance. We have seen the descriptions of lack of acceptance, which include always speaking holes in what they say, difficulty in associating with them, and being uncomfortable when asking them for advice or help. Now we must ask ourselves, what causes this lack of acceptance? Number one, unforgiveness. In many cases, lack of acceptance comes from unforgiveness. Sometimes it's not even from the child directly, it may come through a spouse. These things can be communicable. The lack of acceptance you are exhibiting towards your parents may have been influenced by your husband's or wife's position concerning them. If you are married, this is an area to examine. Ask yourself: Is the way I am reacting to my father or mother being influenced by my spouse's position concerning them? And if you have children who are newly married, pray for them. Sometimes their spouses do not know you the way your children know you, and because of that, some of their actions may be misinterpreted, or some of your actions rather, may be misinterpreted, and those misinterpretations may influence how your children respond to you. Another reason behind unforgiveness is that many people believe where they are today is as a result of what their parents did or did not do. They conclude that the action or inaction of their parents has determined how life turned out for them. But what we often do not consider is that there is an advantage we have in the fatherhood of God. Yes, there is an advantage we have in the fatherhood of God, and we may just be ignoring those advantages. The Bible says in John chapter 1, verse 12, But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name. Because you are born again, you have the right to call God your father. And there is something fatherhood gives, it gives access, it means you are cared for, it means you are washed over, it means you can place demands on the fatherhood of God. If you believe where you are today is solely because of what your earthly parents did or did not do, then there are benefits in the fatherhood of God you are not fully taken advantage of. The fatherhood of God has within it what it takes to correct some of those wrongs. If you continue to hold the actions or inactions of your parents as the reason for your unforgiveness, you may be saying without realizing it that the fatherhood of God is impotent in your life. We must pray this morning for everyone around us. We pray that everyone around us will realize and take advantage of the fatherhood of God. The fatherhood of God can heal, the fatherhood of God can restore, the fatherhood of God can provide what is missing, the fatherhood of God can correct what was broken. Yes. Secondly, the pain parents carry in their own reflection. Another thing that was impressed upon me is that when many parents get beyond a certain age, they spend much of their time in reflection. For some, this begins as early as 50 years old. In that season of reflection, they remember their successes, but they also remember their mistakes. And for many of them, their mistakes are louder than their successes. They are already asking themselves questions internally: why did I do that? Why did I make that choice? Why did I not do things differently? Some parents are already punishing themselves internally with regret. And one of the hardest things for them at such stages is to realize that the children for whose sake some of those decisions were made do not accept them. There are parents who made efforts for their children. In that process, they also made mistakes. But now, in their later years, the same children for whom they tried are rejecting them. We must pray that mercy would prevail over judgment. We must pray that the mercy of God fuels our families. We must pray that children will not become judges over parents who are already broken in their own reflections. Lord, let mercy prevail over judgment in our homes. Let mercy prevail over judgment between parents and children. Let mercy prevail over the pain. Let mercy prevail over the regrets. Let mercy prevail over the memories of the past. Another reason for lack of acceptance is differences in faith. Some people do not accept their parents because their parents are of a different faith. Others do not accept them because they believe their own faith is more advanced. Maybe your mother or father still prays in old ways you no longer agree with. Maybe they still do things you now understand differently. But here is the truth: faith does not and will never override honoring your parents. Devotion to God must not become an excuse for dishonoring parents. You can honor and not compromise. Yes, you can honor and not compromise. Jesus addressed this principle in Matthew chapter 15, verse 3 to 6. Let's read. For God commanded, saying, Honor thy father and mother, and he that curseth father or mother, let him die the death. But ye say, Whoever shall say to his father or mother, It is a gift, by whatsoever thou mightest be profited by me, and honor not his father or his mother, ye shall be free. Thus have ye made the commandment of God of none effect by your tradition. This passage shows us clearly that religious devotion must not be used as an excuse for neglecting honor. Jesus rebuked people who use religious tradition to avoid helping their parents. In other words, faith does not override honor to parents. Paul also speaks to this in 1 Timothy 5, verse 4. But if any widow have children or nephews, let them learn first to show piety at home and to repay their parents, for that is good and acceptable before God. This scripture is speaking to you. Scripture says that putting religion into practice begins with caring for your own family and repaying your parents and grandparents. This, the Bible says, is pleasing to God. So we pray. Lord help us put our faith into practice by honoring our parents. Help us not to use devotion as an excuse for dishonor. Help us to honor without compromise, to love without bowing, and to serve you without despising the people who raised us. Number four, ignorance. Finally, another reason for the lack of ignorance, for the lack of lack of acceptance rather, is ignorance. Some people simply do not know. They do not know that what they are doing is wrong. They do not know that their attitude towards their parents is not pleasing to God. We can pray for them. From Isaiah chapter 30, verse 20. The passage speaks of a time when teachers will no longer be hidden and the people will see them. There are people who need teachers, they need someone to show them what honor looks like. And you may be the teacher they are actually waiting for. So we pray. Lord, raise teachers for those who are ignorant in this area. Yes. That the Lord will raise voices that will show them the way of honor. Let their teachers not be hidden. Open their eyes to see what is right. And also, Lord, make us kind children to our parents. Let's pray together in closing this morning. Lord, we thank you for your word. We thank you for the strength, the correction, and the light you have given us. We pray for everyone who is finding it hard to accept their parents, heal the wounds, remove the irritation, break the walls, deliver them from fear, teach them to honor without compromising their faith. We pray for children, teenagers, young adults, married children, and everyone represented around. Us. Let them be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. Let them see value in the words of their parents. Let them take advantage of the fatherhood of God. Let mercy prevail over judgment in every family. Lord, make us kind children to our parents. Help us not to use faith, devotion, or spiritual growth as an excuse for dishonor. Teach us to put our faith into practice at home. In Jesus' name. Amen. So, my friends, take a moment today to examine your relationship with your parents. Ask yourself, where have I used pain, fear, faith, or spiritual conviction as an excuse for dishonor? Then pray for grace to honor them wisely, kindly, and without compromise. The Lord be with you. I'm wishing you an amazing day ahead today. God bless you.