S01E02: The Broadway Melody

We're back after an unavoidable delay with our second episode.  Join us as we learn of Elisa's strange aversion to Dame Julie Andrews, we have a momentary interruption from Poddog Becky and we discuss perhaps the greatest of all Best Picture winners: The Broadway Melody.

Transcript

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Hello and welcome to the sophomore episode of the Cinema Social Club. I'm your host Cameron, and joining me on this episode are my co-hosts Glenn, Sarah, and Elisa. And before we get around to this week's Oscar Best Picture Winner review, we start with some entertainment news. And it came to light in recent weeks that Mobland star Tom Hardy has either been fired or walked off the show that he fronts. Rumors suggest that Hardy, who plays the angry, unruly Harry D'Souza on the show, was often angry and unruly during his time on the set this season. If I were Mr. Hardy, I would have used the method actor defense. They give you Oscars for that sort of thing. And it's been announced that Zack Snyder is shopping around his planned remake of the classic John Carpenter film Escape from New York. The original film, written by Carpenter in the 1970s, is a work of complete science fiction, as it envisions a New York that is somehow even more dystopian than the one in the 1970s. And finally, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences have announced that they will create a list of 50 theaters from around the world for their newly created Academy Marquee Theater List. It will be made up of theaters that give audiences the best theater-going experiences. When asked for comment, a representative from Regal Cinemas simply looked down and slowly turned away while sad music played. And now, a quick look at this past weekend's top five at the box office. At number five, it's The Breadwinner. The film was directed by Eric Apple, who hails from Endicott, New York, which I mentioned for no other reason than I had relatives from Endicott, and I thought it would be nice to give it a shout-out. And number four, still somehow clinging to the top five, clinging on for dear life, like a baby being dangled over the railings of a hotel balcony, it's the Michael Jackson iconograph picture, Michael. And number three, it's the unwieldedly titled Star Wars The Mandalorian and Grogu. I know nothing about this film except that apparently it takes place during some sort of war in space and it may or may not feature Yoda. Actually, that's basically my knowledge of the entire Star Wars franchise. Retaining the number two spot this week is the horror film Obsession, which makes me happy because it lets me say the name of the director, Curry Barker. And finally at number one, a new entry and yet another horror film, it's Backrooms. The film that is apparently based on something to do with the internet, which, despite being in the younger half of the people on the podcast, I still don't fully understand. So with that out of the way, we turn to our brief roundtable discussion, and I thought this week we'd do something nice for the older generations of Hollywood. Too often these days we celebrate the works of greats after they pass, but I thought for this week we could look at some of the old timers that are still with us and give our brief thoughts on their careers. And we start with someone who, in a little over two months from the time of recording, will be turning the very large 100 years old. He has given us nearly a century of laughs, and he is, of course, Mr. Mel Brooks. And we will start with Glenn. Glenn, your thoughts on Mel Brooks. What can I say? When I hear the name Mel Brooks, my heart just goes Baump, Ba dump, Ba dump, but um. And if you know Mel Brooks, you know that joke. I love Mel Brooks. I grew up on his comedy. I I have uh literally every Mel Brooks movie that he's made, uh, including the ones he's produced. So um I'm just so happy he's still with us. I was very sad at the passing of his best friend, Carl Reiner, because I thought, oh, poor Mel, he has nobody to hang out with at night because they work together every day. Well, and his other best friend, Anne Bancroft. Ann Bancroft, yeah, he lost a long time ago. And I, you know what, it's he's where I probably got my sense of humor from. Yeah, that's fair enough. Uh Sarah, as the youngest on the podcast. To be honest, um Melbergs, I appreciate and respect and acknowledge the legacy that he has. It is not. Well, I can just see the giant butt approaching. It's more just there's a lack of exposure on my end, to be completely honest, because it really wasn't my parents' sense of humor, like the more kind of slapsticky tongue-in-cheek stuff, which sort of by extension is why it's not so much my sense of humor. So I didn't really get exposed to a lot of I've seen a few Mel Brooks films, but I didn't get exposed to a lot of it as a young age at a young age. And it's not something I particularly pursued as an adult because the like my humor and my interest in comedy just sort of evolved with the times. Not to say that he's not timeless. I just wasn't exposed to it. It's a different kind of humor, it's a totally different kind of humor. Because a lot of his stuff comes from the Borscht belt in New York, from the stand-ups, and a lot of it comes from um even prior to that, I'd say kind of goes back as far as it's tied into his time at with like Sid Caesar and your shows. Yeah, so it's just tied to sort of because every generation has their their kind of comedy, their comedians. And so Mel Brooks to you would be something like you know, me watching the Ritz brothers, you know, from the 1930s. Yeah, so it's just not like I respect. Now we have to explain this everyone. The name is actually familiar, but I so I respect it and I appreciate it, and I it's incredible that he has done the work that he's done over decades. It just completely missed my generation. Sure. So that's pretty much where I'm at with it. It has to be said, he's also a massive film fan. Yeah. Because obviously a lot of his films are based on classic films of different eras. Uh Alisa, you're more of a horror film fan, and obviously that is not Mel Brooks' rock. No, but boy do I love Mel Brooks. Loved him as an actor, a producer, loved his wife. I I I think beyond what they did in film, um, they seem like a really nice, fun couple. What a great couple, right? Uh yeah, and I know he he pulled his comedy from from so much um in his past. Yeah. Um, but if you've ever listened to our podcast before, um my dad was a huge fan of Mel Brooks, and he also, my dad influenced me um and made me watch all those movies. So um I can very much appreciate Mel Brooks. Well, there you go. Way to nearly make it to 100. Take him there. You're almost like that. You're there, you can do it, buddy. Uh and of course, somebody who has already reached the hundred milestone is everybody's favorite, not at all cockney, Dick Van Dyck, who is a hundred as of the time of this recording. Uh, obviously, probably best known for his television work. Yeah, and arguably maybe sort of early Disney. I was gonna say Mary Poppins is a big one. I mean, the accent is questionable at best, but he was quite fun in Mary Poppin'. I watched a recent Not his fault. No, not his fault. It was a recent interview of a whole bunch of British actors and actresses, everybody from all the dames to younger British actors, and they were all asked which American actor did the worst British accent of all time, and they all nailed Dick Van Dyke. And even Judy Dench said, I'm so sorry, my dear, but it's you, Dick. Now, I think this the story is that he was given somebody by Disney as a dialect coach, and the person was Irish. Oh, I mean so well known for doing cockney accents as Irish. So he was already uh behind the eight ball, really. Um it's funny though. I like I know him from Mary Poppins, I know him from the Dick Van Dyke show. Yep. I would have a hard time thinking of anything he did later in life, with the exception of maybe he had the Diagnosis Murder. Diagnosis Murder? Maybe the only thing I can think of. Like I can't think of him from any films. Although he must have worked quite a lot. He did, and he did a lot of films in the 70s, um, which nobody's ever heard of because they didn't do tremendously well. Yeah. Um Don't Raise the Bridge, Lower the River, and some other ones that uh Okay, well, you've just made that title up, but sure. Uh I feel like he might have been some of the 70s live-action Disney films as well. Yeah, that's what I'm looking up right now. He made a lot of TV appearances, that kind of thing. So he was in all of the Knight of Museum movies. He wasn't maybe the funniest clip from uh well, it would have actually been, I don't think it was the Carol Burnett show. I it was either the Carol Burnett show or Mama's Family, because Mama's Family was a spin-off of a sketch from the Carol Burnett show. And I don't remember whether the scene was from the Carol Burnett show or it was from the spinoff of the mom, but it was him and Tim Conway, and he was sort of playing, I guess, the Harvey Korbman role because Harvey Corbman wasn't there, but it was Tim Conway and the elephant story, just killing it. Just look it up on the on the YouTubes and you'll know. Yeah, he's been a busy guy, but I have to say I have not heard of a lot of things, which I think is mostly me. Starring in a cold play music video. Yes, and I most recently saw him because I re weirdly re-watched the Night of the Museum movies recently, and he is in all of them. He is quite entertaining. He's the janitor guy. Continued to be a wonderful dancer right up to, I guess, now. Well, he dances in the cold play. Bang bang. I forgot he was in that fever dream of a musical. My god, what's the one? Chitty Chitty Bang Bang and Mary Poppins sort of intermeshed in my head. They are both odd. One of them leans a lot more heavily into the fever dream, which is definitely chitty chitty bang bang, but they're both odd. But I feel like even the musical numbers are sort of similar instead of. They are, yeah. The energy is the same. Same place. He was, yeah. I never cared for him. No. I only knew him from Disney and how about the Dick Van Dyke show? Dick Van Dyke show. If that was on, I turned it off. If you had to watch it, I would just leave. Although fair enough. Although, to be fair, he is kind of the lesser person in the Dick Van Dyke show. The Dick Van Dyke show is funny because of the people around Dick. Yeah, because it was a skit show, correct? Well, no, what was a sitcom? Okay, so it was a sitcom. He played a writer. Okay. They played characters who worked in a sort of skit show comedy. Yeah, they played characters who basically worked for like a Sid Caesar type. Correct, yeah. TV show. That's why I'm conflating. When he came in the room, they'd fall over an Ottoman. Yeah. I mean, it was just like just stupid. Oh, it's just very slapsticky. Yeah. Yeah, but diagnosis murder. That was a good show. Yeah. Eva Marie Saint, star of Alfred Hitchcock's North by Northwest, is 101. Also, apparently, one of the secrets to a long life is to be an actress who has worked with Hitchcock. Vera Miles, who starred in Hitchcock's The Wrong Man, and then perhaps more famously Psycho, is 95. Shirley McLean, who is one of the stars of The Trouble with Harry, is ninety-two, and of course Tippi Hedrin, who had trouble with some birds, is ninety-six. Kendirds people who just watch No, sorry. Those movies ever age. Let's hope. That's the idea. We'll just keep watching Hitchcock films. Eva Marie Saint, if if the only film she made with North by Northwest, I would be obsessed with her. I was just gonna say, to be honest, I think that is the only film that I have seen her in. And I thought she was just divine in that movie when I was younger. I thought she was the coolest character. She was. Really everything about that film is great. Eva Barise. Oh, she was in tons of stuff. Yeah. But I would argue. I don't know. It's like that's really the only one I could have. I would make the argument even probably I preferred her to Grace Kelly as Alfred Hitchcock leading lady. Yeah. I do too. She was more she she could be cool and almost like ice cold in some ways. Correct. Much more approachable than Grace Kelly. Yes. Yeah. Well, she wasn't a literal princess. Yeah. That helps. And speaking of Alfred Hitchcock uh alums and Sarah favorites. Sure. Dame Julie Andrews, who is 90 years old. I love her so much. That is going to be so I we watched because we were like doing just house tours. So we put on Shrek 2 as a background because and she voices the mom in that one. And her voice, the second you hear it, you know who it is. And it's wonderful. And she was so good in the Princess Diaries. And obviously she's been in a billion things other than that, but like that was my movie when I was a kid. We I probably watched Princess Diaries hundreds of times. She was famously in some other films. She was, but for me, like if I if you asked anyone of my age generate, like my age demographic, what is the movie for her? It's that one, without question. And she is like the people's queen, as far as we're concerned. You know what I mean? Oh, my head's gonna explode. What is the problem with Julie Andrews? She's a national institution, and she's not even American. She's a national treasure. Irritating. I hate the accent. Is it too late? You hate her British accent? No. In fact, we are currently uh taking up our fourth co-host. My god, what are you have a problem with her accent? I do. Do you have an issue with literally every British actor? I'm not allowed to say that on the podcast. Well, yes, would be the answer to that. Yes, I thought her singing was beautiful and many. I mean, she's very good in sound of music. Excellent in sound of music. Oh, she's phenomenal. I hate the sound of music. And movies she did later, some of the Blake Edwards, she was married famously or to Blake Blake Edwards. Yes. She did some movies of his after. She's quite funny, as well as it's. In the movie uh is it Ten? Yeah, Ten. With uh Dudley Moore Dudley Moore. Dudley Moore. She's hilarious in that. And she's hilarious in the movie SOB that she did with Blake Edwards. Yes, she's a delight. Oh, Derek, yeah. Uh I will say I understand somebody who may not like Sound of Music because for years I would have. I now love Sound of Music, but for a long time I did not like it at all. Sure. Yeah. But the so like I can understand that, but that was more my aversion to musicals than it was specifically to Sound of Music. That was. And finally, let's see if we can make it a clean sweep of people that Elisa hates. We turn to star turns director Clint Eastwood, who celebrated his 96th birthday the day before we are recording this very podcast. Boy, does he? So yesterday he turned 96. So he's 96. And how old did you say Julie Andrews is? My God, they are aging differently. Yes, because Julie Andrews looks the same that she has since she was like 70. And Clint Eastwood has looked 95 for about 20 years. He's not on the list, but William Shatner's like 120 somehow in the book without the show. That is true. It is insane how well he is aged as well. But Clint Eastwood, I would argue maybe the best example of a star who became an even better director than he was an actor. I would agree with that. I mean, there's a couple examples of that. Ron Howard would be on the list. I'd say Ron Howard was a really good actor, though, too. Clint Eastwood, I would say, is a passable actor. I think he's very good in the roles that he is suited for. Yes. Right. He's great in like the spaghetti westerns. He's also very good at Unforgiven. It's sort of that wheelhouse of acting. See, those are the ones I don't like him in. I mean, I I said I run hot and cold with him. But but I know you don't like this, but I love him in Gran Torino and I love him in the Mule. I don't mind Gran Torino. I didn't like the Mule. The Mule I found to be incredibly boring. I think I like his later works. Okay. I like some of his later works. I think some of his later works can be kind of boring for what they are, to be told about it. Yes, and he tends to play the same sort of thing. That's the thing. No matter what age he's at, he really has always kind of played the same guy. I kind of he kind of reminds me of John Wayne in that way, where there's extremely one- little little different hues of the same color. And people think that he's incredibly talented because he's made a lot of movies, but if you actually look at what the movies are, he's the same guy in all of them. Although I would argue he is very talented as a director. Yeah, I think he's a direct one. I would love to work for him as a director. Yeah, he's apparently quite a unique director. Also works fast. Yeah. I love the stories that people tell about him. Doesn't say action. Doesn't say action, doesn't say cut. All right. Go ahead. Go ahead. Go ahead. That's enough of that. Yeah, I mean it was clearly the right pivot to move more in that direction than acting. So there you go. A couple of uh people who are still with us. Most of which Elisa hates. And most of whom Elisa can't stand for reasons passing really anyone's understanding. Uh and now on to the main reason we've all gathered here. It's week two, and we continue to dive into the long list of Oscar best picture winners and decide which we feel are deserving and which we are deserting. And this week we look at 1929's A Broadway Melody, which took home the second ever best picture Oscar. And being second doesn't always help you live long into the memories. And that's what some people think of a Broadway melody. Uh but to its c I've lost my part of the that's Becky the the part of the podcast. We have a podcast dog who uh sometimes likes to interrupt. This will probably get edited out unless I'm lazy and forget to. But uh anyway, being second doesn't always help you live long into the memories, but it uh to its credit, the first musical to win best picture and the first sound picture to win best picture is a Broadway Melody. And what's most notable about Broadway Melody is that it is staffed by a group of people whose most notable film in the their discography is a Broadway Melody. No well-known names to the casual film goer here. But does that affect the overall viewing experience? Well, let's discuss that now. Uh, and before getting into our specific ratings, I will open it up to our esteemed and frankly slightly disgruntled panel to offer their views on a Broadway Melody, a title which is perhaps more jaunty and cheerful than the viewing experience. Uh so thoughts on a Broadway melody. Where to start? Uh I I I would wish at the end, but unfortunately we have to talk about it. Exactly. I mean, normally Well, let's start with something positive. Oh. Um Okay, good. Now I don't know. Normally, so my thing is I try very hard when we watch films like this, like much older films, I try very, very hard to give it the credit that it deserves for when it was made because standards were different then, technology was different then, talent pool clearly different then. So you have to look at it from that perspective. But I think being made in 1498 means even with all of that in my brain, I cannot think of a single part of this that is like worth the accolades it apparently got. Yes. I have I have to agree. It's funny because I went back and reread basically the Wikipedia description of the plot and the story, and I'm reading a description of something that I did not watch. Oh, good, right because a lot of the stuff they're saying was going on in this movie. I I didn't know. I will say Wikipedia had a lot more insight than the casual viewing audience. It didn't you didn't see this stuff, you didn't get any of the stuff they were going for that Wikipedia is saying was in the plot. It was it was convoluted, it was muddy, it was I'd say badly acted. Yes. I mean to say it had a plot is a bit generous. Yeah, it it was I didn't get it. And I didn't get the relationships among the characters. It was it was rough. I was finding myself wondering how the heck this managed to win Best Picture. Uh well that's why I asked who else was nominated. Yeah. That this was it the only film. I don't know. It was in fact not the only film. I think unlike the first year, where I think it was only like three films that were nominated for Best Picture, I think it was a relatively full slate of films. Which is right. And I think you mentioned at one point when we were prepping for this that there was another musical in the mix. Yeah. Up to the book. There was another a better musical, which was. Which is why I don't understand how this even happened. Because to tack onto what Glenn was saying, there was no plot to this. The Hollywood Review was the other musical. Which I have to believe is better than that. Which is also MGM. Because the bar was crazy low, but like there were the character motivations were completely convoluted. You had no clue motivations Bordering upon non existent. There was no clear bad guy and also no clear good guy because no one was likable. Not one character was like, Was a bad guy. I just don't think it was intentional, although it's hard as hell. Because like you have you have Eddie, who is, I don't I think. I think nominally we're supposed to be rooting. See, I thought we were supposed to be rooting for Eddie. Yeah, but sometimes you think he was the bad guy. I mean he's terrible, but I think we were treating people badly. Like if I had to guess, I think maybe Queenie is maybe supposed to be the person that you're rooting for, just because she's the auntie. I don't think you're supposed to be rooting for both of the women, both of the sisters. By the way, they are sisters. Like actually related to the city. They were supposed to be related to the city. That was not clear. I was not clear at all questions. Really poorly casted. You wouldn't poorly casted. Yeah, I think in some ways you're supposed to be rooting for both of them, at least to get through their troubles and mend their relationship and all that. But I don't care. Well, no, and by the end of it, no one actually got what they wanted. The end of like not maybe Queenie. Maybe Queenie, arguably. But Queenie had initially set out wanting to be like an actual star and performing and ended up married to a jackass or a jerk. A jerk, married to a jerk. Um, and then Hank wanted to make way to self-censor a little too far after the fact there, Sarah. Then Hank wanted to make it big and be a success, but was also weirdly obsessed with her sister, and then ultimately ended up traveling with a person who was horrible to her all the time, but she was just as horrible to the to her right back. So I guess that's a match made in heaven. Like it just seems like not a single person got what they wanted. Yeah, not a single person ended up learning anything by the end of it, and I went away from it just mad. Poor cinematography. Yeah, poor, poor dancing for a musical choreography, yeah, poor music for a musical. In fact, we unless you really love a particular song, in which case you're gonna hear it a lot. We have we heard Broadway melody over and over and over and over, and maybe two other, I think, uh things that we heard. There was the there was two other musical numbers, well, three other musical numbers, uh two of which were actually staged in the Broadway. Yes, one of them was kind of okay. Like the guitarists one I found myself liking the easy one. And that was weird. And that was it. It was weird. That was that one. That was yeah, music-wise, but it completely came out of left field. Which I think was a musical number. Song it was dancing anyway. There was dancing, and there was dancing that's and there was the big dance number. Yeah, again, if you can call it that. My god, well, and that was the other thing. The women were not talented in terms of like singing and dancing and anything like that. And Queenie, who is supposed to be the one that is like sweeping everyone off their feet and is the face that launched a thousand shit, like and all this crap, was thoroughly average. And I'm not even saying that critically, but it's just like she was just a normal person with a less than average singing voice, like there and who could not dance, like there was nothing about her that was like story in any way. If anything, Hank, I would argue, was the one that stood out more, but she was just so obnoxious. Well, and I'm also willing to accept the fact that maybe they're not supposed to be talented as part of the storyline. But the problem is the storyline's so bizarre that it's hard to tell whether they're supposed to be talented or not. Because everyone's falling all over Queenie, and then the the thing that changed everyone's lives in regards to Queenie was just her standing still for like five minutes. Yeah, standing up on the brow of a ship holding a rama doing nothing for five minutes. All right, yeah, we're gonna paint you and call you the uh Columbia logo. And let's go back to But it got her a new art deco approval. Let's look at the women and how they were and how misogynistic. Oh, yeah, I mean, 1929. I know, but it was awful. It it was lecherous. Oh, it was 100%. It was touchy, feely, creepy. Yeah, Eddie was an apt. But to defend creepy. Well, that's this is gonna be great. I sound terrible now. Uh but the women were as misogynistic as the women were really terrible to everyone. The women were terrible to each other, and they were terrible to everyone else involved, and the way that they spoke about each other and to each other was just from such a male perspective. Like these were 100% women that were written by men in the worst kind of way. I'm going to shock you. Was this written? No. No. Uh there are there is there is one woman on the writing team. Oh, wow. One whole woman. She probably her job is is described as continuity. So it's possible that she wasn't. She was the stenographer. No, and secretary. Even the moments that were meant to be the showstopper, like it's never a good sign if I am watching a musical and it makes me want the white Christmas scene choreography. Because that to me is one of the worst scenes out of any musical ever made. And I found myself longing. It's my head and shoulders above which one. Yeah. Choreography for White Christmas. Anytime that any of them were dancing. Well, it would have been the best song by far in this. Like, oh, a hundred percent. But they were there's like the talent pool had to have been so different in nine the 1920s, clearly, because they did not get a good dancer for any of the leads. They did they did acrobatics. That is true. There was that one guy who was doing a lot of cartwheels. If that's dancing, lots of cartwheels in there. I will say, Anita Page, who played uh Queenie, was once described as the girl with the most beautiful face in Hollywood. I that can't be right. Nope. Can't be right. She was also, that this is according to Wikipedia, she was referred to as a blonde, blue-eyed Latin. What? She's apparently apparently very big in silent pictures. Yeah, I could see that. Yeah. I could see that. And died in 2008. Oh, 98. Wow, she was right out there with the rest. No, I don't. She worked at Rex All Drugs for the next 67 years. Did anybody in the movie work on any other film? Oh, well, Charles King, who played Eddie, was a pretty big I mean in fact, he was one of the stars of the Hollywood review, which was the other musical that was nominated for Best Picture. I cannot understand why this is the one that got it. I really don't. Didn't we discuss when we were watching it that maybe someone slept with someone? I mean, listen, that's always a possibility. I mean, it's the 1920s Hollywood. I think it's a kind of a deal. High probability. But even that didn't save it. My gosh. Well, what it what gets me, and it's not even like the studios paying for the win because MGM made a better musical that was nominated. They had something else they could have used and instead chose to do this one, which is just nuts to me. Well, I can say I don't know of any sort of list it made of uh of like best 100 films or even best 100 musicals. So I think looking back retrospectively, I don't think it's considered nearly as good as it uh was at the time. Oh, I feel bad. There is a movie crash. There is a quote. There's a quote from Variety, a contemporary review from Variety that said, uh, quote, has everything a silent picture should have outside of its dialogue, a basic story with some sense to it, action, excellent direction, laughs, a tear, and a couple of great performances and plenty of sex. Well, they were watching a different film. Yeah, because I don't recall any of that. They were watching the Broadway melody of 2025. Oh, you know what? Might have been, because it was remade, right? Like five times. Uh it was remade at least. Well, I don't know, remade or just they just because for a period of time they were just putting different new years on the there's like the Broadway melody of 1939 and the Broadway Melody of 1940, something. Yes. And then Broadway stopped being relevant, so they stopped making those films. Uh just kidding, Broadway. Uh if anything, you've never produced anything as terrible as the Broadway Melody of the World. Not that I can think of. Um so we can now move on to our our uh specific categories of rating. And remember, uh we rate them, well, zero to five really in four categories. Uh and we come to a collective decision on zero to five. And the four categories are visuals, story, acting, and rewatchability. This should be fun. Uh we'll start with visuals, which which encompasses quite a lot, really, because that's costumes, it's cinematography, it's it's framing of the which was poor throughout this film. The only thing really it would be dance numbers as well, because they're visual media. The only thing in there that that actually was kind of pretty at times were the costumes. Yeah, although some of them were very strange. Well, yeah, but but I mean they were flashy. But at least they were interesting for sure. Yes. All right. Uh so that's anyone have a solid feeling on this visuals. I mean, I'm gonna have a hard time going past like a half a point. Point five, right? For visuals, I might give it a one. Yeah, I mean, we could do a we could do a one for visuals. We can do half points, yes. I would be fine with a one. Let's just do a one. This will probably be our most general. I think you're being overwhelmingly generous with the one, but let's go with a one because I don't think it's gonna get any better from there. Uh story. Uh zero. That's a good one. If you can find one, you can write it. And even that is too much credit. This is a zero. Uh yeah, I mean, I guess there were characters, but there were indeed characters. The extent of having a story. And those characters had lines. Yeah. And I think there was an attempt at a story in there. I just don't know what it was. So it's a zero. Yeah, that's gotta be a zero for me. Big bagel. Uh next up, big bagel uh potentially controversially acting. Well I mean there were there were there were there were actors. There were people. There were people who were doing things. I thought that, you know, the one the woman who played Hank, I thought she did a good job, but she was just unbelievably annoyed. She was very annoyed. And that's kind of the problem here because I don't know, I don't know that that was her fault or if it was just Well, I don't even know if that's what her character was supposed to be. That's what I mean. Like I don't know if she was supposed to be grating and obnoxious and intense, or and if that was the writing, or if that was her. And then beyond her, everyone was terrible as far as I'm concerned. Even like the supporting characters. Yeah, the supporting characters weren't great. There was the uncle that had a stutter, and then he didn't have a stutter, and then the stutter moved back and goes. And the drunk guy that kept showing up, and he was just annoying and uh bad at being. Basically, the the dancing priest was basically the only good person in these. For me, it's a half-a point. And a half-a point is generous. Uh yeah, okay. Uh does it would it does anyone want to make the the case for a zero on acting? I'll go with half a point. I I'll go with a half just for the priests. Okay, we'll give the priest half a point. What does that ever mean? A couple of glimmers of hope. You know, the priest really saved his face. This is really great. Um rewatchability. That's a zero. That's the biggest zero I've ever given. Well, so here's here's our rankings because we've done two films. The high water mark so far is Wings, which received a I think a very respectable 16 out of 20. Uh, this has received a grand total of 1.5 out of 20. Uh so I'm I'll I'll make a prediction right now. I mean, maybe this is brave of me, but I think that might be our lowest rating of all the mistakes. That very well might be our lowest rating. Yeah. But uh, I guess congratulations. Someone had to be worst. And it's good for you. And and and you know, good for us for having gotten it out of the way. Exactly. It's a win-win. Yeah. Well, yeah, it's certainly something. And with that done and dusted, we move on to our final segment, in which I torture my co-hosts with film trivia until they are forced to capitulate. Perfect. And this week we will go head to head answering a series of questions based on a specific subject. And that subject is Hollywood Firsts. Oh God. Okay. I mean, Lem was there for most of us. Yeah, I will say probably gets an advantage here. This feels like a major advantage for the rest of us. Question number one. Wait, are we pitted against each other? Oh, yeah. No, no teamwork. No teamwork. It's all war. The person with the most points wins. And what do you win? You don't have to be on the podcast next week. The trick is to just like Glenn go first. Uh question number one. Well, there's one question you don't want Glenn to answer first. Question number one. As an established as established on last week's episode, the movie Wings was the first film to win the Oscar for Best Picture. But Kent can you tell me the first picture the first Best Picture winner to also win Best Director? Was that A, Wings, directed by William Wellman? B All Quiet on the Western Front, directed by Lewis Milestone. C, It Happened One Night, directed by Frank Capra. Or D. Gone with the Wind, directed by Victor Fleming. Which film was the first to win both Best Picture and Best Director? And in this question, you can really anyone can start. Yeah, I mean I have no clue. There is a very Glenn-specific question in this. Yeah, I mean, I know for sure one of them the director won best uh director, but I don't know if it was first. I am going to go with because why not? Uh it happened one night. Okay. I'm going with Gone with the Wind. Okay. Because um I'm the one you can remember of this. No, I would give I would give it the same rating that we just gave. Oh, I thought you were gonna say the Broadway Melody. I mean, I know I hate Gone with the Wind, but I would give it a little bit more. I would give it more than that. Even I would. And Gone with the Wind might be my least favorite film. And even I would give it more. So you saw Broadway Melody. And then that took the cake. Exactly. I'm just having a hard time remembering if Wings won it for Best Director. I'm gonna I'm thinking that it did not, in which case I know for a fact it happened one night, won Best Director, so I'm sticking with It Happened One Night. Okay, well, I can report back that all of you are incorrect. It's this the correct answer is All Quiet on the Western Front, directed by Lewis Moston. Although I will say It Happened One Night is the first picture to not only get nominated for all five major awards, but win all five awards it was nominated for that. That's incredible. There's only three movies that have done that. Wow, and that's one of them. So Glenn and I get bonus points. Sure. Not at all. Question number two. These days we often measure box office in the billions. But did you know that the very first film to gross over one million, not just it for inflation, was Neptune's Daughter. But what year was Neptune Dot Neptune's daughter released? Was that nineteen fourteen, nineteen twenty-four, nineteen thirty-four, or nineteen forty-four? I have never even heard of this. I haven't either, but I'm gonna say nineteen twenty-four. Okay. Um I'm gonna go with nineteen fourteen. Okay. I'm thinking it might be an a silent film. So I'm going with 1914 as well. Okay, well, I can tell you it is in fact a silent film, and it is 1914. Wow, way to go. Look at that. Shocking upset. So currently a tie score between Elisa and Sarah. Holy crap. Plenty to play for. Question number three. Uh, these days it's hard to leave the house without stumbling over a new Marvel film. But which was the very first Marvel superhero to feature in a feature-length film? Is that A, She-Hulk, B, Captain America, C, The Punisher, or D, Blade? Oh my goodness. Now, I could tell you among our three podcast co-hosts, I don't think there's Glenn, maybe, inside chance. I don't think there's any of you that are huge comic book fans or Marvel aficionados. I think Glenn's probably the closest to being. Yeah, I'm a casual fan of the game. I can sort of see picture Sarah being more manga still. Yeah, no, I'm definitely more in the like graphic novel. Graphic novels. So we have She-Hulk, we have She-Hulk, Captain America, The Punisher, Blade. And repeat the question again, please. Uh, which of those four was the very first Marvel superhero to feature in a l in a film? I'm gonna say Blade, although I don't know when the Punisher came out. Blade. But I'll go with Blade. Oh, that's tough. Um I'm gonna go I'm gonna go She-Hulk. I think it's gonna end up being She-Hulk. You watch it. My spidey sense tells me the Punisher. Okay. Well, I can tell you it was in 1989, and I can tell you it was the Punisher. Ah, nicely done. When did Blade come out? Because I was like back in the world. She-Hulk was like one of those side characters that always popped up in like the really old ones. So I wasn't because she was in like the 90s Fantastic Four film. Yeah. Well, I also picked her because like Hollywood has a history of making sort of sex blocation films about the other thing. Which is basically what they did. Yeah, correct. I think you said She-Hawk. No hawk. Although She-Hawk, I think Lady Hawk is a thing. Also, in my research for this, I never realized uh Wonder Woman, uh DC character. Yes, Wonder Man Marvel character, who I had never heard of before, but apparently exists. Oh yeah. No, it's ridiculous how many crossover names there are. Who got that? You got that right now. That's the one. Yes, Glenn's got no points. Although he does have a question coming up that's sort of terrible. That's pressure right there. Uh question uh number uh four. The first official made-for-television film was a drama called See How They Run. But what year was it broadcast? Was that 1944, 1954, 1964, or 1974? Sarah, I see you on your phone. Am I gonna have more of those people? My boss texted me, I had to text her back. I'm going with 44. Okay. I'm going 44. Okay. I mean, sure, let's jump on the bandwagon and go with 44. Well, I can say you probably shouldn't, because you're all wrong. Darn it. It was, in fact, 1964. That's crazy. Really? And it featured, because of course it did, George Kennedy and Leslie Nielsen. Of course. Oh, wow. Goodness. Who would be reunited decades later? Star John Forsyth, I believe. Again, made for television royalty. Yeah. Uh, question number five: what was the first Oscar Best Picture winner to be shot primarily with digital cameras rather than on physical films? Oh. Was that A, Crash? B, Slum Dog Millionaire, C, The Hurt Locker, or D, The Lord of the Rings, The Return of the King. Oh man. Can you repeat all of that? Okay. Including the question? Including the question. Okay, you're not even the one on your phone. You just have attention deficit. I just want to absorb it. Question number, well, absorb quickly, because I'm not reading this for a third time. Question number five: which was the first Oscar Best Picture winner to be shot primarily with digital cameras rather than on physical film? Is that A, Crash, B, Slum Dog Millionaire, C, The Hurt Locker, or D, The Lord of the Rings, The Return of the King? Huh. When did The Return of the King come out? Well, I can give you a hint that was the third one. Because that was the only one that won Best Picture. I think in the mid-2000s, if I remember correctly. Well, the first one kit was celebrated its 25th anniversary. Something like that. So that was 2001. So it was mid-2000s now. I would say maybe 2010 or something like that. Um I'm gonna we I don't know, I don't know why. I just feel like this is maybe a film that I could see doing this. I'm gonna go with Hurt Locker. I've already forgotten two of the films. Perfect. See, and I'm concentrating on Lord of the Rings. What's their excuse? My excuse is I'm not paying attention. What's their excuse? I'm just waiting for the case. How do you know? That's true. So we have we have Return of the King, the Hurt Locker, Crash, and Slumdog. Slum Dog Millionaire. I don't think this is right, but I'm gonna go with Slumdog Millionaire. Okay. If you're right. I'm going with Crash just because Crash. Well, I can tell you, as much as I didn't. Dislike the film Crash. It was made by Paul Haggis, who is like a proper film nerd. So definitely uh film. Also, a surprise. The Lord of the Rings, The Return of the King filmed on 35mm. That doesn't surprise me. Despite the fact that like 90% of it is CGI. That actually weirdly doesn't surprise me. But I can tell you the answer is, in fact, Slum Dog Millionaire. What? Luku Clean House. Man, oh man. I believe the current score is three to one. Yes. With Glenn not on the board. Yeah. Well done. Question number six. There have been many actors over the years who have won back-to-back acting osters, including Spencer Tracy, Catherine Hepburn, Jason Robards, and of course, Mr. Tom Hanks. But who is the first director to win best back-to-back best director awards? Is that A, Frank Capra? B. John Ford, C, David Lean, or D Steven Spielberg. Wow. I'm gonna go out first again with Frank Capra. Okay. I am between genuinely, I was thinking about him or Steven Spielberg. So I'll also go Frank Capra. Okay. Ford. I can reveal to you the answer is in fact John Ford. I'm losing my mind. This is so impressive. Is it impressive or are you shocked? Let's do both, but nonetheless, it's impressive. I mean, I I don't find it impressing so much as dumbfounding, but sure. I am profoundly confused. Yeah, well, so is Elisa. Maybe that's the maybe that's the trick. No, I just feel like these things are coming to me. Oh god. Okay, well, the vibrations in your head are not what you think they are. Question number seven: the now somewhat forgotten but still highly beloved format Laserdisc saw its first feature-length debut. Which with which Glenn favorite film was that A, 2001, a Space Odyssey, B, The Exorcist, C, Jaws, or D, Star Trek, the Motion Picture. Besides, Star Trek are all my favorites. Well, we've already previously established that you and Glenn's letterboxes are pretty similar. Yeah. Because it's the film that you hate the most on that list. On that list, it is definitely the one I'm least. Although I don't know that I can give Star Trek that credit, because I don't know that I've seen that movie in years. So maybe that one is not as good as 2001 a space Odyssey. It's good in its way. It's nostalgically good. I don't think it's as bad as people like to make it out to be. Fair enough. I mean it's not as good as the It's not as good as Wrath of Khan or any of the even number ones. Correct. Or the series. Yeah. All right. So it's like if you took the series and then gave everyone like 12, six packs of beer, sort of gave them 20 years to sort of beer gut out, and then broke them all back together again. Yeah. Uh man, this is tough. So the Exorcist, Star Trek Motion Picture, Jaws 2001, a space odyssey, first laser disc. Motion picture came out in 1978 or 79, really. Um CR thinking is very different because it was lasers. So I was like, it's either a Space Odyssey or Star Trek. Because lasers are pretty much my only reasoning. Well, there's overthinking and then there's underthinking. I chose the underthinking pattern. My head is just binning around for the exorcists. Okay. Nice. Don't encourage her question. Glenn, uh, I'm gonna need an answer from you. I said Star Trek. Yeah. I will I can tell you, you all picked absolutely different films, and you're all wrong. It was in fact Jaws. Jaws the first film released on Laserdisc. Uh nothing to play for because Elisa's already won. But question number eight: which 1994 film was the first to have a budget of a then eye-watering figure of a hundred million dollars? Good. Or what is now known in Hollywood as the Craft Services Bill. Is that A, Forrest Gump, B, Clear and Present Danger, C, Beverly Hills Cop 3, or D, True Lies. A hundred million? It was the first film to have a hundred million. Adam gone out of the gate first again. I'll say true lies. Okay. I think it's true lies. Okay. I'm gonna just dare to be different and say forest gump. Well, you can dare to be different, but you can also dare to be wrong. That's fine. Uh, but in fact, two of you are correct. It is true lies. I just went with James Cameron, the guy who makes the most expensive movies. I I went with the scenes in that had to cost a bunch of money. Although Clear and Present Danger was not well, I mean, it was about 40 million behind it, but it was it was still quite expensive. Um, did I get five? Five out of eight, which is which is pretty remarkable. That's incredible. Uh we may have to well, she's being removed from the podcast anyway. So this is sort of high water mark. Go out on a high, I guess. Yeah, Julie Andrews is replacing you. Yes. She's 90. She'll be the one on the podcast. She finally answered my emails. Finally, one of my contemporaries, yes. She was actually an understudy in uh production Glenn did. Uh and with that fun and frivolity out of the way, we only have time left to close the show down for this week. Thank you all for listening and tune in next week when we will continue our march through every Esker Best Picture Winner with 1930's All Quiet on the Western Front, as we've now figured out the first picture to win Best Picture and Best Director. But until then, and on my on behalf of my co-host, it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.