I just Shipped my pants!

This podcast gets started in the most awkward of ways but eventually we figure out curiosity is way more revealing than being stuck in a mindset created by societal norms!  Does your nervous system need a tune-up?  Listen to this episode of The Ryan Luelf show, I just SHIPPED my pants. 

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Transcript

SPEAKER_04 0:04

This is the Ryan Lulf show. Barlow, I'm gonna need you to tell that entire story over again.

SPEAKER_01 0:12

That was you know it's not gonna be the same. It is what it is.

SPEAKER_04 0:16

You know, it doesn't matter though, because it was so good.

SPEAKER_01 0:19

I don't even know that I want it documented. All I'm here to say is this the first three or four times you take this purple packet, it you have to know that you're within 20 to 30 feet of a toilet or open air that you're okay with shitting in or on. But after that, after your body realizes that it it doesn't need to be so dramatic, I'm like, okay, really? Like, can you chill the fuck out? Your body starts to acclimate to it, but I now so I shipped probably 200. Shipped or you shit? Well, both. I just shipped my pants. I just shipped my pants.

SPEAKER_04 1:01

Who remembers that commercial?

SPEAKER_01 1:02

Oh, I do remember that commercial. That's a great commercial. I just shipped my pants. Yeah, I just shipped my pants. That that along with Where's the Beef? Two of the best commercial Do you remember Where's the Beef? Oh, who doesn't? Wendy's, Where's the beef? They open No, okay. Marketing guy.

SPEAKER_04 1:18

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 1:18

Um all I ever hear is we have the meat.

SPEAKER_01 1:21

Yeah, Arby's. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:23

Oh my gosh. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:25

I think Can I finish my story? Oh, you're not done.

SPEAKER_04 1:28

Okay, I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_01 1:29

So I shipped 250 packets of this the Thailand fiber over, and I take it on the regular. It is it is the best fiber. Now I might be dying internally and I don't know it, but it is the best fiber I have ever had. It but but there is it is so systematic within my system that I know exactly when I'm going to release. I know the firmness based on my body, and I know if I'm healthy or not based on the shape and the texture, and I used to never be able to do that. I'm trying so hard not to laugh.

SPEAKER_04 2:04

That is very fascinating.

SPEAKER_01 2:06

You can laugh, chat. You can laugh.

SPEAKER_04 2:09

Did you Barlow, do you think maybe possibly you made it through that moment? Okay. Did you did you make it through?

SPEAKER_01 2:18

I don't know that I made it through that moment, okay. I think it actually changed.

SPEAKER_04 2:21

Okay, because I I have the perfect song for you.

SPEAKER_01 2:24

Oh listen, yeah, play the song because Ryan's not in tune to the podcast right now. I have to play something clearly more important than that.

SPEAKER_04 2:31

I have to play, I have to play this song.

SPEAKER_00 2:37

Oh. I don't know. Go ahead, Jess.

SPEAKER_04 2:39

I have to play this song because it's a perfect segue into I think what you the story that you just gave and the vibe that we're about to enter into with this show, this episode. Let's hear it of the Ryan Lelph show.

SPEAKER_03 2:56

Put one foot in front of the other, and now I see.

SPEAKER_04 3:07

I refuse to answer that question until you listen to the whole song. It's I know it is.

SPEAKER_02 3:33

Make it through the night. Make it through the night.

SPEAKER_00 3:45

I mean like it. I really like the music. I can't wait to share it with my kids and my wife and it's fun.

SPEAKER_04 3:53

I hope it's fun.

SPEAKER_01 3:57

It's the right time. For me, in my season, it's making it feel good.

SPEAKER_00 4:01

I feel like a lot of people would be in a season if they would enjoy this. Have you tried donuts?

SPEAKER_04 4:10

I put it on Spotify. That's where you stream.

SPEAKER_01 4:18

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 4:21

Well, you can buy it, but it's like people have to pay like Apple Music to be able to have access to it.

SPEAKER_04 4:30

Well, I say a little cut, it's not a cut at all, because if you see how much artists actually make on Spotify, it's terrible. It's a fraction of a cent. Every stream.

SPEAKER_00 4:40

I could I couldn't help myself, Marlo. I um I've got a really intimate relationship with my chat GPT. I know you do. And I just put, I have a client who says they get constipated when he travels. And I think you're gonna be intrigued. This is extremely common, especially in men who travel for work. This is really all you need to know right here. It's usually not a digestive defect. It's more of a travel-induced nervous system and a routine disruption issue.

SPEAKER_01 5:16

Oh. That is good. It is it for me, it's a routine disruption because I'm very disciplined usually on when I eat and how I eat and so here are potentially the reasons that may cause you to have constipation when you travel.

SPEAKER_00 5:32

In no particular order, learn one is that your nervous system shifts. So travel might represent deadlines, airports, unfamiliar beds, and time pressure. And potentially that's pushing your body into a sympathetic flight or fight mode. Digestion requires parasympathetic rest and digest. So when there's no safety, there's no bowel movement. That is so interesting. The gut loves rhythm. My gut does. So when your routine is disrupted and you're traveling, you potentially have different wake times, you're having different types of meals. Yeah. The time that you might be, I don't know if you drink coffee, but you may be doing that at different times or whatever you're you know consuming. Um, you have your your bathrooms aren't familiar, you may not even know where they are, etc. And so it could just be that your body is saying, uh, not now, not now, not now, not now, not now. It is, I know it is. Right. Here's another potential factor. Dehydration could play play a role. Flights tend to dry us out fast. Coffee and alcohol worsen it. When the stool becomes hard and dry and slow, this can also be a culprit. Um there's also maybe times where you are so locked in on what you're doing that you maybe missed an indication that it was time to go and you might be holding it in. Now you may not be doing that now, but maybe that was something you did early on before this became more of a problem. It says you could be there's meetings, I'll go later, airports, I gotta board the plane, public bathrooms. Every time um we we ignore urges, we are training the colon to wait longer. I'm not accusing you, I'm saying just these are neat things to explore. It's so fascinating.

SPEAKER_04 7:27

Okay. So to anyone who actually has constipation issues, we hope you make it through the night.

SPEAKER_00 7:33

I I do we doesn't this just I hope you do. Like, I don't think everybody that would type this into their chat GPT would be getting the same information I have because I spend so much time with ChatGPT. It knows you it knows me and it filters everything through the heart of what I want to do, which is like try to actually provide something that could be helpful to people.

SPEAKER_01 7:50

Or just poop regularly.

SPEAKER_00 7:53

Yeah. I mean, I can just tell you, like, I came from I I I used to be a high fruit eater, and of course I've done vegan, I've done raw vegan, I've done plant-based, you know, um, but I've been on a high fruit diet for a long time. But now I eat carnivore and I don't eat that much fruit. And so I used to be under the assumption that like, you know, having one, two, maybe even three bowel movements a day like was super healthy. Um, and I'm not saying it's unhealthy. I just when I went to carnivore, I started having this awareness, like, oh my gosh, I haven't had a bowel move in two or three days. And when I'm strict carnivore, especially just like steak and eggs, I only have like two a week. But I don't, I'm not constipated. Like, and I feel amazing. And so I started doing some more research and homework on that. And at least from what I'm understanding, it's because my gut has healed and I'm not eating foods that are void of nutritional value. So the reason I'm not having as many bowel movements is because my body is actually my stomach is absorbing the nutrients, it doesn't need to eliminate or waste or release it. I found that really fascinating. Um so I'm no expert, I'm not a doctor. I'm not saying I know all of that, but it just gave me a a peace of mind because it was quite different. You know, I was used to going, like I said, once, twice, pretty much on the regular. Now two, maybe three times a week.

SPEAKER_01 9:26

No kidding.

SPEAKER_00 9:27

Yeah. And I feel a nice. They don't look bloated. And do you feel good? I'm just gonna say you feel good. No, and and they're they're pretty, they're just solid and they're clean, and they're yeah. Now I will say, uh not not to do TMI here, but um it's been kind of a joke because it feels like when I do have to go, I gotta go for a minute, you know? So I'm in there for 10 minutes. You know what I'm saying? But it's not loose. I don't have loose stools anymore. I used to have quite a bit of those, you know. Which is a sign of an unhealthy gut. Right. And I was thinking the opposite, you know, but I just I I I've come into more information about it.

SPEAKER_01 10:02

Well, and I I think most people, most men especially, have no idea that that that that your your poo-poo tells a very big story on your health. It does, yeah. Yeah. The texture of it, the way it comes out, how often it comes out, the color of it, the smell of it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 10:19

Anyway, um, how's your poo-poo? Wonderful. I love his answer. Yeah, sleep in a power.

SPEAKER_04 10:27

Better than yours.

SPEAKER_00 10:29

Especially better than mine in Thailand. I want to leave you with this, right? Psychological permission, Brian. This is the new story that you're gonna tell yourself going forward. My body knows how to poop anywhere. I actually want to take this in. Hold on.

SPEAKER_01 10:49

Oh, God. I really do. I'm still a kid at heart, so whenever Chaz hits the farm.

SPEAKER_04 10:56

I'm sorry, that's all me there.

SPEAKER_00 10:57

But I do want to take this in. Psychological permission. My body handles travel well. It's always giving me signs and signals. I'm tuned into it. And regardless of if I'm in my routine at home or if I'm traveling for my dreams, goals, and desires and making an impact in the world, my body knows how to release itself and relieve itself everywhere and everywhere, and I give it permission because anxiety plus embarrassment equals pelvic floor tightening, which equals no exit. So I release all fear, all anxiety, all embarrassment, all stories, and I no longer make those. Now, at the same time, also be practical. You know what I mean? Like look into maybe your diet. Look into extra magnesium for when you're traveling. Uh potentially make sure you have uh a little bit more movement. Maybe when you're traveling, uh you're pretty focused in on work or whatever you're doing. Maybe you're not having quite as much movement. Um maybe uh you need to drink more water. Uh that's probably something we all could do. You could add electrolytes, you know, especially if they're magnesium-based. Um, and you can sip constantly throughout the day instead of just chugging like every you know what I mean? Like it's much better to just be kind of drinking like ongoing all the time. Um and uh if you do you drink coffee? No. Oh, perfect. Good. Yeah, you're great. Here's what it says what not to do. Overuse laxatives, panic when it doesn't happen daily, force or strain, ignore urges repeatedly. Constipation feeds on urgency and control. So here's a reframe for you. This isn't a broken gut, it's your nervous system asking for safety, hydration, and rhythm. When that lands, symptoms often soften quickly.

SPEAKER_01 12:51

Okay, I'm getting ready to travel internationally. I'm going to do this. So I'm assuming I need to say this out loud and my body needs to hear it. Wouldn't hurt. I'm gonna I'll report back how my poop has transitioned from being constipated whenever I travel, especially internationally, to doing some of these techniques, and we'll have a full report in a couple weeks.

SPEAKER_00 13:20

Well, I'll say this. Regardless of anyone's belief system, I'm pretty sure gravity is just gravity, and no matter what anybody believes about it, it's just gravity. I think there's some universal laws that we may not all agree on that kind of work the same way. One of those universal laws that I feel like I'm understanding is whatever story I tell repeatedly becomes my belief system, and whatever I believe, I have to have a life that continually proves it to be right. So, I don't know if we talked about this, but an example would be a lot of people have a belief that you can't do well financially unless you work your ass off. They're right. They will never have an abundance of money come to them unless it's tied to them working their ass off. The universe never forces, it just matches belief systems, frequencies, vibrations. So you're not really doing anything wrong, but if you keep telling that story, it's gonna need to continue to be right over and over and over again. And I'm not saying that there aren't real actual tangible changes you might want to also consider, like drinking more water or movement or whatever. Those can all be helpful. But at the end of the day, somehow, some way, you're going to do actions, eat foods, and go about your health in a way that's gonna prove the story that you keep telling over and over and over and over again to be true. Because we all do all the time. We're manifesting machines, whether we realize it or not.

SPEAKER_01 15:07

I buy into that. Both the good and the bad version of that.

SPEAKER_00 15:12

Yeah. Like I'm I'm I mean I I don't think it matters if we buy into gravity, like if we go up to the top of this roof and jump off, like we're gonna realize gravity is a real thing. I I feel pretty confident that what I just described, that's just how it works. Like we don't I don't think it really matters if we believe or not. Like we can we have to just be honest enough to go, shit, can't really deny it. Just keep showing up.

SPEAKER_01 15:41

Chaz, I want you to um there's two things here. I want to go back to I'm gonna ask a question in a second with Ryan. But while I'm doing that, I don't know if you can you get online right now? Yeah. I want you to go online, I want to get to Ryan's Facebook page, and I want you to pull up this post that he made. Uh, I think it was on Monday, is the post that I think it's got 245 comments on it right now. But I want you to read the post out, and then I want you, as we're discussing that post, I want you to bring out some of the comments because I think this is important to what Ryan is saying, and I'm gonna tie it all in in just a second. Okay, but while you're doing that, going back on the money thing, Chaz. We were talking about at the beginning of the podcast. Chaz obviously has a talent with music and creating music and singing music, and man does he. I mean, and I'm super jealous.

SPEAKER_00 16:32

I I just I am jealous, but not in like the jealous sort of way. Right, right, right. Like, just more of like, man. But hey, we all have our areas, you know. I just feel so grateful that I get to now enjoy his amazing.

SPEAKER_01 16:45

That part of Chaz that we didn't even know existed.

SPEAKER_00 16:48

Yeah. But what would sometimes I'd have to say, you know what, that's what I'm gonna start doing. If I ever am like, I'm done with what he's saying. I'll be like, dude, just turn your music on. Yeah. Yeah. That's key to like I'm checking out. All right, dude. We've had enough of Chaz's uh that version of his voice, but we do need some more of the other version of his voice. Give us the calming, soothing Chaz. The playful. I don't have to be right and argue and debate and push back voice. No, I'm just giving you shit.

SPEAKER_01 17:17

Oh, what? Is that the squirm?

SPEAKER_00 17:21

Dude. So in the I mean, this guy is so talented.

SPEAKER_01 17:24

Like squirm. Um I have a feeling I'm gonna get snatched into that too.

SPEAKER_04 17:30

Uh the squirm squirm cinematic universe is ever evolving and it's amazing.

SPEAKER_01 17:34

I feel like the squirms in your vision are just gonna be anything and everything that's cool and funny. Okay. But um what would you say to someone like Chaz or a younger guy who has talent, has potential to make a lot of money if that's important to them? Like you've m- you've mentioned your struggle with money, the ups and downs, making a lot, not being able to save a lot, spending too much. You've gone through the ebbs and flows. If you could revert back to your younger self and help, which I'm sure you're in the in the process of probably helping several of the people who hire you to coach, what is the fundamental thing that you would change that you have someone change when it comes to how they view money?

SPEAKER_00 18:17

Well, I think the foundational piece is, you know, it's it's always, do I live in a world of abundance or have I accidentally, unconsciously, and probably at no fault of my own, do I live from a world of lack, of limitation? You know? Like, is it an absolute truth that there is a limited amount of money that we all have access to? Is that an absolute truth? I I think so. I mean, because some people just print that shit. Doesn't look like there's any limitation to them. They want more, they just print it.

SPEAKER_04 18:58

And Barlow, you're looking for the post about money?

SPEAKER_00 19:01

Yes.

SPEAKER_04 19:01

Okay, I found it.

SPEAKER_00 19:03

No, I didn't think it was a post about money. I thought it was the one that you said got like 245 comments. That wasn't about money.

SPEAKER_04 19:09

Oh no, different.

SPEAKER_00 19:10

Well, what what post are you reading?

SPEAKER_04 19:12

Well, uh, I'm going on Ryan's page.

SPEAKER_00 19:15

Uh which one are you referring to? The one that got like 245 comments was me saying that I was not a Christian anymore.

SPEAKER_04 19:20

Oh, okay. Hold on a second.

SPEAKER_00 19:21

You don't really want to go to that. No, I I'm just I'm just making sure that you're clear on that. I mean, I didn't know where you were going.

SPEAKER_04 19:27

No, I was trying to figure out which post you guys are wanting to look for.

SPEAKER_00 19:29

Yeah, that's yeah. Okay. Barlow's not sure, so Jazz isn't sure, and now I'm not sure. So we've got three unsure people. This is an awkward moment.

SPEAKER_01 19:37

Yeah. Um so go going back to your question though. Oh, I found it. Um about money and my interpretation of what what are you suggesting? You're suggesting that like there's like anyone has free will, free, free potential to uh earn unlimited money. I think that that that's the true, but you're saying no?

SPEAKER_00 19:58

Well, well what I'm suggesting is is like where how would you define the limit? If if there's not complete and total abundance, what what is your limit? Is there a certain amount you feel like you could only make or only access or only earn? What and and then what is that number and how did you how did you come up with that?

SPEAKER_04 20:20

I think part of that comes to excess, you know, and like how far you're willing to say this is what my time, treasure, and talent are worth, and then abusing that and saying, No, I'm worth 500 grand. You should pay like how many artists do we have that are paying themselves millions of dollars? Not talking people making money on Spotify, I'm talking about people putting up shows. Millions and millions of dollars. And at what point do they say, Okay, I have enough? And I think that goes back to what we were talking about last episode, or the last what is four, three or four episodes that we're talking about. Is enough ever gonna be enough? And I've I've kind of experienced this in my own way because I remember one thing that made me really want to pursue live music more than creating music itself, was the moment that I had stepped on stage at Tulsa University and opened with one of my friends' bands for I think it was a former Disney Channel star, Ross Lynch. His band, I think, is called the Driver Era. And we walked in, and I mean, this is like, you know, two or three o'clock, we set up. The show's not till seven. We do a sound check at four, everything's good to go. And we thought to ourselves, there's only going to be about 400, 500 people. Cause I mean, this is not a, you know, be okay style show. I mean, it's not, it's barely like a canes ballroom thing. So what's a couple hundred people? Well, we we've all done that before. The room was filled from wall to wall, and you will never, ever understand that feeling unless you've done it. The sound, even with 26 decibel isolating in-ear monitors, you will never understand the feeling physically. And I, if we're going to like the idea of vibration for a second, here we go. I've never physically felt in my body the feeling of 3,000 or more people from wall to wall, front to back, with light on the crowd. I've never felt the physical sensation of 3,000 people going, ah, just for an opener. It is better or greater than any sort of high you've ever experienced in your life. It's wild. And I think that feeling is what I would relate to as the feeling of never enough. Because the second I felt that I went, oh man. Oh, I see what he did there.

SPEAKER_01 22:56

I wasn't sure where he was going with it.

SPEAKER_04 22:57

I wasn't either, but I'm like, do you see what do you see what I'm saying? The feeling of like, oh man, I didn't realize this was possible. I have that impact. I like just by stepping on stage, people saw me. And I'm not talking about me personally. I'm talking about the group that we were with. You know, I was a part of it for what, one whole day because I needed a fill-in drummer, which was cool. But that feeling you'll never replicate ever again on your own. You there's no way to. So the never you you constantly you're searching for that. No, and that's the thing I don't want to. Really? Yeah, because it's too much.

SPEAKER_01 23:40

It's just too much. Well, hold on. I'm getting conflicting stories here. I thought I thought that the feeling was overwhelming and and the vibration was something you've never felt.

SPEAKER_04 23:49

And Okay, I'll I'll I'll explain here. So yeah, the experience is overwhelming. The I I don't know how you'd call it. The this is the only way I know how to say it, the fleshly side of you. The carnal. That's probably the right way. The carnal side of you goes, oh, I want this, I want more, more, more, more, more. But then you see all of the people who have fallen into drug and opioid addictions as creatives, as artists, who've committed suicide because they said to themselves, what I have is not enough. Forget five million dollars per show. Forget the 5,000 screaming fans, not at a BOK Center show. That's 25,000 people we're talking about. Can you imagine what people are feeling on an internal level when they say, I don't have this, and I want more, more, more, more, more because they are addicted. It is a chronic addiction. It's not just a choice.

SPEAKER_00 24:49

I mean, I I think we gotta be careful. I think I think I think where we are crossing the line is how much time we spend in tune with other people's lives and not as much as in tune with our own. And we we share from personal experience not to challenge or convert or change everybody else to say you need to go about it this way. Because who's to say that we didn't need everything to be exactly the way it was in our own life in order for us to even come to the conclusion that we had? And who's to say everybody else doesn't need to have whatever they have happen and unfold in their own life in order for them to come to whatever conclusion that they're having? Trevor Burrus, Jr.

SPEAKER_04 25:29

The people who have already gone through that problem before, which is they've committed suicide, they were addicted to drugs, they said to themselves, what I had wasn't enough in a physical, tangible way, not in a theoretical conceptual way. Right? That's what I'm speaking to. I'm not speaking that, oh, this is everybody should not do this. I'm saying, to the effect that you're talking about, why are we chasing more and more and more?

SPEAKER_00 25:57

Well, let me ask you a question. Yeah. When did you when have you ever known in your life that you took something too far?

SPEAKER_04 26:07

I have to really think about this for a second. Okay. I I think uh it just it just popped to me. When did I take something too far? Oh, about two months ago.

SPEAKER_00 26:22

Well, but that wasn't the question. I said how have you ever realized that you ever took something too far?

SPEAKER_04 26:32

What was it that caused you to realize not when how I I think the how speak speaking from a human plane, okay, Barlow, I know you appreciate this. Speaking from a human plane, you recognize that what you're searching for and the consequence of your action don't align with the intended reality. So can I put a brief example in this?

SPEAKER_00 27:07

I don't think it's necessary.

SPEAKER_04 27:08

Okay. D do you know where I'm going with it? I do, okay.

SPEAKER_00 27:13

In other words, the way I interpret your answer is you went too far, and that's how you discovered that you went too far.

SPEAKER_04 27:23

I think that that's a plain way of saying it, but it doesn't get to the root.

SPEAKER_01 27:28

He's not suggesting that it did.

SPEAKER_00 27:30

We don't even need to. We weren't trying to go for the root. I was just wanting simplicity here. Like, I think that's how it works. I don't think any of us can ever know what's too far until we're at the point that we realize it's too far.

SPEAKER_01 27:46

And it's different for everyone.

SPEAKER_00 27:47

And it's different for everyone. And no amount of you trying to save me, protect me, uh, share your line of where it was too far for you, none of that's gonna work for me. For one, I'm too damn curious, I'm too adventurous, and I think most people are, or I'm too programmed, or I'm too bent, or I've got operating systems I'm unaware of. And so I come more of the philosophy of I don't want to have a bunch of fear tactics. I don't want to try to protect anyone or prevent anything or save anyone. I'm more about when you know who you are, you're ready to navigate, handle, face, and go through anything and everything. At any time. At any moment, at any time with anyone.

SPEAKER_04 28:39

Ryan, did you ever have a point where you felt like you went too far with something?

SPEAKER_00 28:43

Oh yeah. All the time.

SPEAKER_04 28:46

Do you so you know what I'm talking about? And why why I give the answer that I give, right?

SPEAKER_00 28:52

Yeah, but what what I'm saying though is like if I try to tell people, hey, don't go too far, I I don't I don't think that serves anybody well. Like that's all from my perception. Well, I think that I think both can be interpreted as I know better than you. And especially if I'm a Christian, I know better than the Holy Spirit in you. That's what's always been kind of confusing for me. You know? Like, for as much as Christians say they believe in the Holy Spirit, they don't seem to ever allow the Holy Spirit to do its work in me. Because they're too busy telling me where I'm getting it wrong or what I should be doing different, or that I've gone too far.

SPEAKER_04 29:33

And in their mind, that is the Holy Spirit.

SPEAKER_00 29:36

I'm I'm I'm speaking from But yet he doesn't ever want me to say that we're God or that we're the fabric of God or that the essence of God. I'm not gonna let you two uh hold this podcast hot. I know, but come on, you have to admit there was some irony in that.

SPEAKER_01 29:53

There is, but however, I do want to I do you think though that Chaz, are you impressed with the fact that Chaz was able to walk away from something and a feeling of abundance that most people get captured into, caught into, that eventually ruins their life.

SPEAKER_00 30:11

So I I am curious. Yeah, I think it's I think what I've what I heard was that he put it into context, he put it into perspective. I didn't I didn't personally hear that he said it was bad or that he didn't enjoy it. He just noticed that it could have sucked him in to thinking that he just needed bigger, more, that that feeling was something that he wanted to always feel. Yep. Okay and so that that sounds healthy. That sounds like healthy observation to me, right? And I think it's the same with but but I don't want to, but that's just my opinion. Like all that matters to me is if he feels like he had healthy observation, and if he feels like having awareness around that moment was a good guiding point for him, it doesn't matter what my opinion is.

SPEAKER_04 31:02

I had a word just come to mind.

SPEAKER_00 31:03

Does that make sense? Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 31:04

Yeah, I had a word come to mind when you said that, and the word is obsession.

SPEAKER_01 31:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 31:08

When you become over, when you become obsessed with something, I'm gonna I'm gonna touch on this. When I the the thing I'm talking about is not what most guys think I would say, and that's vinyl collecting. Why is that a weird thing to say I got over? How did I know the line was too far? Man, I got to a point where I was looking at my system. It started with on my birthday, I was like, oh, you know what? I'll just go ahead and pick up this. And I'm can't believe I'm getting this story. I thought it'd take longer. But I finally, I decided, I was like, I'm gonna go pick this up on my birthday. It's a $50 crossly or whatever. And then I put the record on the player and did the whole thing of putting the brush on it and like, you know, picking up the static and desk. And then I heard it and went, ooh, okay. And then I went down the rabbit hole of how can I make this sound the way that I want it to sound, not the way that it actually sounds. And that's why the other night it was so crucial for me to just listen to how it sounded without the need to make it perfect, especially for something that is an imperfect.

SPEAKER_00 32:06

Yeah, and by the way, I thought that was beautiful. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_04 32:08

Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 32:09

I mean, but isn't the idea of perfect just a made-up concept in our minds anyway?

SPEAKER_04 32:14

I differ on that a little bit, but hold on.

SPEAKER_01 32:17

How do you differ on that? I I am curious. How do you differ on that?

SPEAKER_04 32:20

Well, the the reason I differ on that is because my framework is different. And I you you guys know why my framework is different, so we don't need to get into it. Right?

SPEAKER_00 32:29

Correct. Right, but but but you really believe that there like is a defined way of of of perfection? Like it's not it's not like something that we make up in our own mind as that that's obviously influenced by other variables that makes us go, that's what perfect would be or look like today. Right.

SPEAKER_04 32:51

Correct. There is a standard. I do believe there is a standard, and I do believe you can be influenced by outside things. No, I don't think that makes your idea of perfect subjectively perfect. I think what you got at and that I'm hearing is like subjective perfection versus a standard. And I think that's the difference, is like my my framework of understanding Christianity, there is a level that we are held accountable to. And that's what keeps so many Christians tethered, I think, to fear when it should be attached to hope and not despair. And that's where that's where I come. Like, I'm like, dude, like, why would you want to live at a place, even though there's a verse, fear God? Okay, yes, you should feel it, fear of God, because if it as a Christian, if you believe this way, then you have every right to believe you're going to hell, but you shouldn't be afraid of that. I mean, to your credit, Ryan, you should absolutely, we should be taking the wisdom that you have to some degree and say, here's the framework to live with the fruit. Because as a Christian, uh, my framework comes from we we want to operate out of the fruits of the spirit, love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, self-control. All those things are the fruit. And I think what you get at too is something beautiful where you give people wisdom and they hear it as wow, this is the fruit. This is the same fruit that I believe it's Paul who talks about this. The same fruit that Paul talks about, Ryan is giving to me. And they wouldn't have otherwise got it on their own. And that's what's happening.

SPEAKER_00 34:18

What happens though, like like recently this year, I've really been studying and trying to understand and learn more about like our nervous system and what what function that has in our lives and in our bodies, and how was it developed and when was it developed? You know, and I'm I'm I'm a beginner, I'm still learning a ton. But like so many of the patterns, of the habits, of the ways of being, like 80 or 90% of everything we do on a daily basis is happening unconsciously. Like we're not consciously choosing to do it. That's so interesting. We're so unaware.

SPEAKER_01 34:58

Well, and I think you know, it's the nervous system. Um, and I too recently have gotten into how this nervous system impacts really the health and functionality and efficiency of you as a human being. Yeah. And I hadn't first off, why isn't this being taught when we're younger that this nervous system really is kind of like the heartbeat of our entire entity?

SPEAKER_00 35:21

But uh I guess what I'm saying is well, it's a lot harder to turn people into consumers. It's a lot harder to control people, it's a lot harder to manipulate people if they have a thriving, healthy nervous system that feels safe.

SPEAKER_01 35:36

And I do feel like when my nervous system is regulated, and whenever I'm like just me, I feel like I can tackle anything in the world. And and to be honest, my health was in question two or three years ago. I won't go into the that that story, but but there were some questions about some things going on internally. And once I was able to start regulating my nervous system, I feel better than I have ever felt. Now, it goes along with some health or some you know, fitness and athleticism, you know, even at this age.

SPEAKER_00 36:09

I mean, I mean, what if like you were raised in a home that your nervous system got trained? Let's say there was a lot of emotional volatility, for example. And what if your nervous system misinterpreted? Like, what if it seemed like after something really good happened, like you had a great basketball game, or you had an awesome dance recital, or you brought home straight A's from school on your report card? Like, what if it just happened? What if it wasn't like the way it was interpreted? But what if like right after a lot of those events, what if you had like a very um emotionally unstable parent and they blew up on you? And what if your nervous system started living in the anticipation that what always follows what you think is something good is something bad is something bad. And so then what if that nervous system is carrying your life as an adult and you don't realize it? And what if every time something really good happens, your nervous system goes into hypervigilance around the anticipation? And because we're unaware of that, what if then we end up doing things that we're not even conscious of that literally create the disaster or create the spousal blowup or create a bunch of shit to happen every time something good? And then what if we start telling the story? Damn, I can't ever get on a hot streak. Man, I never can find any momentum. God, right after I make really good money, we always have a fuck a bunch of fucking expenses or whatever, right? Like, doesn't that sound pretty human? Yeah, doesn't it sound pretty normal? And then you think you're gonna figure that out from like a religious framework that doesn't give you any knowledge, any understanding, any information around the basic fundamentals of what it means to be human?

SPEAKER_01 38:10

Come on. What do you think? I mean, what is the nervous system? Is it like if if if we were is it is it that thing like you've seen the picture where if you if all your meat and all your body is gone and you just you pull the skeletons like a catfish of like membranes and and and your brain, like is that the nervous system? Like, what is the nervous system? Hmm. That's a good question. Are you gonna ask Chat GPT? Yeah, I am your boyfriend. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 38:36

I like him all that.

SPEAKER_01 38:37

We need to come up, hey Chaz, write this down. We need to come up with a nickname for Chat GPT for for Ryan. Because he refers like this is like his partner.

SPEAKER_00 38:49

I would just say that. But I also would say that I bring consciousness to uh to to my interaction with it. I I'm not I'm not just assuming that everything it feeds back to me is just like truth.

SPEAKER_04 39:03

Well, it's a language learning model, isn't it?

SPEAKER_00 39:05

It's yeah, it's more of um I have a sense, but I don't have any words. So it I think it like gives me, you know.

SPEAKER_04 39:13

One thing I'm cautious about with it, I've I've been told it tells you what you want to hear.

SPEAKER_00 39:17

Maybe but you can also learn better prompts to tell it to like challenge you, to not be an echo chamber to push back and give you the entire aspect of something. You know what I mean? Like it really is about the user. It sounds like a lot like life.

SPEAKER_01 39:38

It does, doesn't it?

SPEAKER_00 39:39

Yeah. Yeah, I think everything's neutral. Like I Chat GBT is not awesome, it's not evil. Money is not fantastic, it's not bad.

SPEAKER_04 39:48

But it does have a consciousness if it learns from you in that way, does it not? To some extent, there's a level of consciousness because it is learning continually from you and your interactions with it. If you said, don't challenge me, I said, okay, well, challenge me. Okay, well now it's thinking for itself.

SPEAKER_00 40:11

I I maybe. Okay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 40:14

Just just saying. I mean, not that not too much.

SPEAKER_00 40:17

I feel like I feel like um a fundamental difference in like how I live my life is like I don't really function from fear anymore. Yeah. I just don't. Yeah. Like I'm just what what am I afraid of? What is there to be afraid of? Yeah. I think it even says in the Bible 365 times Yeah, fear not.

SPEAKER_04 40:35

We talked about this yesterday. Yeah, 365 days, basically, fear not.

SPEAKER_01 40:39

And you're just living it. You're living living that out. Well, good for you. So going back onto that, so what is ch what is the nervous system?

SPEAKER_00 40:46

Um, the first thing that it says is that it's your body's information and regulation network. So it's a system that is sensing what is happening inside and outside of the body. So is it tangible? Is it is it the bloodline? Is it the chemicals within the blood? I mean, it says your central nervous system is your brain plus spinal cord, but then you also have your peripheral nervous system, which are all the nerves branching through the body, and then you have your automic, autonomic nervous system that runs automatically. There's no thinking required. So it decides instantly: am I safe enough to relax or do I need to protect? So then you have the sympathetic, which is the flight or fight, versus the rest and regulation is the parasympathetic. And then you have the vagus nerve, which is a major player there. And I'm just like summarizing, you know what I mean? Just kind of some of the stuff that stands out. You know? So is it tangible? Well, the nervous system is constantly asking questions. Like, is it safe to be fully here? Like, what if these humans found out this about me?

SPEAKER_01 42:09

So going back to being who you are in the rawest, realist form allows you to be the most healthy that you could potentially be because your nervous system does not care. Bingo.

SPEAKER_00 42:29

And how can you do that in an environment where other people think they have right and wrong figured out? And they are not only allowed, but they feel obligated to and they call it love, they call it accountability, and they tell you where they think you're off base or out of bounds.

SPEAKER_04 42:49

Ryan, I just had a thought here.

SPEAKER_00 42:51

How could that nervous system ever be safe?

SPEAKER_01 42:52

Well, I don't think that I don't and I think that's what's wrong with a lot of people.

SPEAKER_00 42:56

Oh, for sure.

SPEAKER_04 42:57

Yes, Chaz. I I think what you're talking about, you're you're striving for heaven.

SPEAKER_01 43:04

No, he's not he's not. Hold on though, let him finish. I'm just but hold on. I'm just saying that that's not what where are you going with this? Because that's not what he's saying.

SPEAKER_00 43:14

Yeah, but hold on though. Through through what he's trying to understand. I feel I feel good energy right here. I I want to I want to let him go. Keep going, Chaz.

SPEAKER_04 43:22

I I think what you're striving for is heaven.

SPEAKER_00 43:24

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 43:26

And I I think what's interesting is what you what you brought up about the nervous system. There is a level. You you asked, why do people operate in a place of fear? Because there if the nervous system can detect it, that means there is fear out there. I think to your point, yes, people do need to stop living in fear. I'm gonna speak to my fellow Christians on that and say, stop living in fear. That said, I do think what you're asking in In my opinion, and this can be however people want to hear this at home. I don't know if you can possibly, and maybe you can help unpack this. I don't think you can possibly experience a heaven on earth because in your own bubble, I say not you personally, but like collective. In your own bubble, you're saying this is how the world should be. And the nervous system says this is how it is. So I'm going to wrap back to a previous episode where you're talking about what is perception and what is reality. Perception is what you believe your reality is. Reality is what it actually is based on what the nervous system is telling you.

SPEAKER_00 44:56

I don't disagree with that.

SPEAKER_04 44:57

So here's here's where I'm going. If people are operating out of a place of fear, and I I agree with you, I think people need to stop living in fear altogether, because it doesn't do anything good for your life. But I think to take it.

SPEAKER_00 45:14

It doesn't, because I think the real thing that we have to do is what is causing any of us to live in fear?

SPEAKER_04 45:20

And that's that's where I think a little bit.

SPEAKER_00 45:23

That's where there's a major disconnect.

SPEAKER_04 45:25

I I would agree completely there. I think when you're saying, no, you're wrong and I'm right, I I do think.

SPEAKER_00 45:35

Let me ask you a question, Chaz. Try to be concise here, okay? Try not to go off too far. Right. Describe heaven to me.

SPEAKER_04 45:47

Bliss.

SPEAKER_00 45:48

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 45:49

And that's one word. Again.

SPEAKER_00 45:52

Give me a little bit more. What what like describe it? Like, what's it like? What's the atmosphere like? So heaven, what's been eliminated? What's not there as well?

SPEAKER_04 46:01

Can I just talk about what is?

SPEAKER_00 46:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 46:04

Perfect unity with God. Untethered by fear. Untethered by um strain. Um completely and perfectly whole.

SPEAKER_00 46:22

Are are is there any danger of um being kicked out or removed or messing up or going somewhere that you wouldn't want to go? Or are you basically there for or the are you're just good? Like you, there's nothing that can change.

SPEAKER_04 46:34

When you're in heaven, uh-huh. And I think I know where you're gonna go with this.

SPEAKER_00 46:40

No, don't do that though, because that that takes you out of being authentic in your answer.

SPEAKER_04 46:43

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 46:43

You don't need to know where I'm going. That's not the point. That's and this is back to something Brian said earlier. You said, Ryan, how do you really connect with people? Real connection is about presence. And I can't be present if I've started to let my mind take me to where I think this is gonna go, because then I'm going to change that and the way I show up and how I present and how I converse, because my mind wants to predict all of that. I have to be completely willing to let all of that go in order for all of my presence to become here and now.

SPEAKER_04 47:16

I I think I have a simpler answer. I think I said it before. Heaven is perfect unity with God. W with God, the the deity, God. That is what I believe heaven is.

SPEAKER_00 47:28

Yeah.

unknown 47:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 47:30

That's and that's the most real answer I can give, whether you agree or disagree.

SPEAKER_00 47:34

No, no, no, no. I I I I wasn't looking to agree or disagree. So would you would you also say that when you're in heaven, you no longer have to worry about going to hell?

SPEAKER_04 47:43

Absolutely. At that point, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 47:47

Then I already live in the heaven you just described. Every second of everyone.

SPEAKER_01 47:54

Well, hold on, hold on, chat, just let him finish.

SPEAKER_00 47:58

Because there's no thought, worry, concern. You're not tethered to anything. Nope. I am one whole with God. I can't mess it up. I can't go anywhere. I can't be nothing. Like what you just described is what I experience.

SPEAKER_01 48:20

So you get to you get to live that through the human form. And if there is an internal form form, you'll get to live through that as well. Absolutely. Like there are there are variations and sequences of this thing, we think, or there might be, but you do know that there's one that's real that exists right now. So you're living in that form, the most authentic version, untethered, unattached, doing it in real time, real experience, real life now. Yes. And what's wrong with that?

SPEAKER_04 48:50

I I just thought of something here, and that is um Yeah, what is wrong with that?

SPEAKER_01 48:54

If I went to I got no problems with it. And I also got no problems with someone that that has to do it in a in a circle of um uh faith-based circumstances.

SPEAKER_00 49:05

Well, I mean, I mean, I think the only difference is that like I don't need someone who says that that heaven can only be experienced after they leave their body. That's their opinion. My opinion is I'm experiencing that right now in my body. Isn't the only difference that one point of view doesn't have the space and freedom to allow the other point of view to coexist, but one point of view is just simply self-expressing their point of view with no threat or no need to change anybody else's mind about their point of view.

SPEAKER_01 49:44

Well, and I think in your teachings and the way that you're able to coach people through that, uh, I think it opens up a lot of people's eyes in the sense of I don't know that whenever I was younger or when I didn't have as much life experience, I don't know that I had the mental capability to be able to handle or manage, or even uh, I don't want to use the word accept, but but put that into my manifestation of my life. But I think it takes a special, unique individual that has had the life experience, that has the wisdom, that has the tangible evidence of I've taken several people that have this thought or this mindset or these issues or those problems, and I've been able to reconfigure their mind, help them reconfigure their mind to where they can figure out that that life can be bliss in all different forms and factions. You just have to be open and willing to be accepting of anything and everything.

SPEAKER_00 50:44

Well, and most people, when they describe heaven, they're describing a place that doesn't have anything externally that they don't like. Yeah. And I'm suggesting that what I would call heaven is where you can live in a heaven-like state with no need to change the external.

SPEAKER_01 51:09

Well, yeah, and how many times I don't know if this has happened for you. And but for me, there are times that I will go places or I'll be in a moment that I just feel like there's no other place I would rather be. Whether it's with somebody, maybe it's by myself, maybe it's a beautiful sunset. There are times I will go out to my grandparents' property where I learned how to fly, and I'll just sit in my car and I'll listen to music. And I just run back images of my grandfather taxiing the airplane down to the end of the runway. We lived in an airport community, end of the runway, the the sound of the engine, the going full throttle, the feeling of the texture of the grass hitting the tires on on the plane, the moment of liftoff where you start you finally start to feel that that that that sensation of of freedom. Like that sometimes, even when I was a kid doing the moment and then reliving it as an adult, sometimes I feel so connected to an internal, a a vibration, a field, a a higher power, a spirit that just makes me think, man, if this is heaven right now, if this is potentially what heaven could be like, put it all around me. I love those feelings and moments.

SPEAKER_00 52:25

Yeah, I mean, I mean, I don't know how there could be anything better than to have a relaxed, calm, nervous system that just knows it's safe at all times. No, that doesn't mean I don't have to have difficult conversations. That doesn't mean there aren't things that happen in business. There aren't things, that doesn't mean there aren't stuff you gotta deal with financially. That doesn't mean I always love how I mean, like the other day, I mean, my four-year-old somehow hit a button and resubscribed to an app or whatever and charge my account 20 bucks. I mean, like, I would have preferred not, I mean, we didn't need that service. I would prefer have to have rather held on to that twenty dollars. But like, that's just life. Yeah. Like, you know what I mean? And maybe that's a small thing for me because 20 bucks isn't that big of a deal, you know. But my 13-year-old son got into rock climbing, and he thought he knew for sure what size a shoe he was. I bought him $200 rock climbing shoes. He wore them one time, they're too small. I've tried to sell them on Facebook Marketplace, no luck. I even was gonna give them away for like $50. No luck. Again, like we can have preferences, you know what I mean? But I see those opportunities as to go, there's abundance, and no amount of striving is gonna eliminate all that.

SPEAKER_01 54:00

Don't you buy in though? Like, I know that you take people to these places where they can find their heaven on earth. Like, I think there's a very real thing there. Like, I think it's a tangible thing that if you can mentally put your body in a in its physical form in a place that allows whatever your version of heaven is, it can be felt here.

SPEAKER_00 54:21

I mean, without a doubt, I I think that, you know, I think first and foremost, though, the human being has to be open to that possibility. Because it goes back to what we said earlier. If you dig your heels in and you're stuck on the idea that that is not true, then that's then you aren't open to that being your experience. You know what I mean? Like money doesn't care. So if you have a story that you have to work your ass off in order for money to come to you, right, then money will only come to you through the avenue of you working your ass off. And what's the price you pay? Well, maybe it runs your marriage, maybe you don't take care of your health, maybe you overextend yourself, maybe you're pushing too hard, and so then you're not thinking clearly. Maybe you get an addiction.

SPEAKER_04 55:10

You took it too far.

SPEAKER_00 55:12

Maybe you took it too far, right? But what if you keep then getting mad at yourself about how far you're taking it, but yet you seem to always just keep repeating the same patterns? It's because you hadn't learned universal law. But if you just think willpower is gonna work, or you think praying to some deed in this sky is gonna work, well, what if it doesn't? Then what are you gonna do? So isn't that fascinating? Like, what if you had to start acknowledging that what you thought worked actually your life was showing you it wasn't? But you just keep doubling down over and over again. It did.

SPEAKER_01 55:46

Oh, for me, it did. I know that for a lot of people.

SPEAKER_00 55:48

They call that being on tilt at the casino, by the way. Yeah, you just keep giving your money away over and over, and everybody else can see it, and you're the only one that can't.

SPEAKER_01 55:55

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 55:56

So I think some people are on tilt with their faith, some people are on tilt with their belief systems, some people are on tilt with their framework, some people are on tilt with their understanding of how God, life, universe, humanity, it all works. And everyone around them is like, dude, can you not see the fucking pattern? Do you not see the fruit? Do you not see the irony of what you keep preaching at everyone else and can't even identify and see in your own life? It's not to tear you down, it's not to make you wrong. It's to simply say, like, try some different. We we see your your irritation, we we see how bound up you are, and yet, like, I've had people go, listen, man, I'll examine all my beliefs, just none of them around God. And I always say, it's usually the beliefs that we're unwilling to examine that probably need looked at the most.

SPEAKER_01 56:53

So, what would you say to to someone watching right now that feels listen, the nervous system is something I I'm even embarrassed to say this, but you know, being in my 50s and just learning over the past three or four years that the nervous system is a real thing, how would you suggest to someone watching right now who might relate to learning just now about their nervous system and how it affects their health, their mind, how they function? Like, how can someone start to regulate that as a male?

SPEAKER_00 57:26

Like in my case, uh, my nervous system um as a as a child, I I interpreted that I was responsible for the mood of of my surroundings, of other people of the room. And so I exhausted myself trying to keep everybody at peace. Because you needed your nervous system at peace. Yeah, because it felt unsafe for it.

SPEAKER_01 57:50

But you didn't know it was your nervous system, you just knew it felt weird. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 57:54

So now, like, I'm super intuitive, you know, but now I have new awareness, and I'll notice very quickly my nervous system, you know, scanning a room or you know, noticing a mood that a family member's in or someone else. And now I have the awareness of, and I just kind of have internal dialogue, like Ryan, that's not your responsibility. You've ran yourself down. One of the reasons you've been physically sick so much is because you took on things that weren't yours. Um, if that person is not open and willing to learn how to regulate their mood and their emotions, and you're not enjoying that, then you just need to set up a boundary and just lovingly not have them in your life on a regular basis. And be okay with that. Yeah. That's how you start to regulate your own. It might not be my preference. Yeah. Right? Like my preferences very rarely match up with my everyday reality. And that's not because I don't believe I can ever have my preferences. I just understand that they're just preferences.

SPEAKER_04 59:02

Ryan, do you think putting up that boundary keeps everyone from being unified?

SPEAKER_00 59:07

Not at all. It's not a it's not a boundary of like, I don't like you, or I hate you, or I can't see you, or I couldn't run into you at a party, or I can't function with you, or you can't text me. It's just I don't get drawn into your drama.

SPEAKER_04 59:23

That's why I I think the reason I ask is a lot of Christians do that. They they put up a boundary when they say, Oh, I don't agree with this. I don't agree of this way with living. They do put up a boundary. And there's so many, not just Christians, but many people of different faith backgrounds do this as well. And, you know, we we've we've mentioned it before. The whole thing is we want people to be unified.

SPEAKER_00 59:47

Well, we got to distinguish here. I would say that most of those people coming from those frameworks, their boundaries are not based energetically. Their boundaries are based behaviorally. So they draw a boundary because they believe you should only have sex inside of marriage. And so they draw a boundary with someone who's having sex outside of marriage.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:09

What if they drew the boundary on, oh, I disagree with that, but they still retain the friendship? Isn't that what we're doing right now?

unknown 1:00:15

Right.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:15

Just hold let me finish my thought because then you now you're saying something different. So like you got to slow down a little bit because you you said one thing and I was speaking to that, and then now you've shifted to the point of where I was headed, and it's like, well, but I wouldn't have needed to say this other thing if you hadn't said the thing you just said before. So I'm suggesting a boundary not based on whether or not I think the way you live is right or wrong. I'm talking about a boundary of I don't feel energetically comfortable, safe, and at peace in your field. And so I'm going to lovingly not do a whole lot of life with you until I feel like your energetic field changes. But that has nothing to do with whether I think what you're doing is right or wrong. That's the difference, I believe. Most of the boundaries that I think a lot of religious people are setting up is based on them sitting in a judgment seat of I don't think that person should be doing what they're doing in their lifestyle. And that's not where my boundary is coming from.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:18

Right. You hold the power. Yeah. Whereas other people tend to let the power hold them.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:23

Correct. So it's an important distinction, is all I'm saying. Like that doesn't make me right. I'm simply wanting to give more expression and language to like where I'm coming from and like how I function, how I live. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like if I have a boundary with someone, it has nothing to do. I I don't even really want to know, or I don't even care. I mean, like, if you and I have a really close, intimate relationship and you want to share about your sexuality, or you want to share intimate details about something going on in the category of money or whatever, like I'm just happy to be a listening ear and to do life with you and share and all that. But like I don't have any interest in being like, dude, what the fuck's wrong with you, man? You're doing it wrong. I can't believe that, or whatever. Like, none of that is even in my system any longer.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:08

Well, and it's not, and it's not in your coaching or teaching because you you're you're literally trying to soothe the nervous system down. Yeah. And if you and if you if you act in that way, the nervous system is going to be already in fight or flight mode. Okay. And therefore, we're gonna have all kinds of bore uh boundaries and systems and things to to dive through before we get to the transparency of here's the root of the problem, here's the solution. Yes. So yeah, so I and I I am I'm truly captivated by this whole nervous system conversation. I really am, because I wish, I wish we were taught that younger of how integral it is into our health, our well-being, even how we think and how we breathe is attached to our nervous system. And so I think that's a fundamental positive in your coaching and your teaching, in the sense of we most of your people, most of your clients are gonna come with a nervous system that's completely out of whack and they have no idea why. And you have to penetrate that.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:05

I mean, Caroline, my wife, you know, is a beautiful example of some of some of this, you know, and and I'm free to share it. She she's okayed it, you know, it's all good. But I told you about this amazing moment we had the other day at lunch, dinner, whatever it was in the afternoon there. We were at Pure Food and Juice here in Jinx, Oklahoma. And I mean, basically at the end of the day, some things that unfolded in her childhood put her nervous system in a place where if there were two things she loved, it never felt safe to believe that she could enjoy both at the same time. So she's in a can you imagine the stress of that nervous system of always thinking you have to choose and give up something that really means a lot to you? Well, I didn't realize, and some of it's my responsibility, and I realize now that I had not seen this, but she was feeling some of that, not consciously, but very unconsciously. She was feeling like she had to choose from between her career that she loves and the dynamic, incredible, intimate relationship that she loves with me. And she was feeling conflicted. And it was not allowing her to sleep at a deep level. It was allowing her, she was walking around a lot of times on eggshells. She was afraid at any moment I was going to get upset. She was trying way too hard to be like perfect in her work. You know what I mean? Like, it's just incredible, like the the underlying things that were going on there, you know? And then because I'm evolving and I'm growing and I realize how powerful we are, it just hit me in the moment like what if we could retrain your nervous system to know the truth? I'm like, is it an absolute truth that you have to give up one or the other to have both? No, it's not. Okay. Well, we may not know how to do that right now. And maybe the last two years have been kind of hard and challenging. And what if we don't have to just throw away either our marriage or throw away your career? What if we invited ourselves to learn a new way of being human? What if we invited ourselves into a new place where we could retrain that nervous system and it could go, I can have a healthy relationship with my career and feel the endorphins and the energy and all the things that I love that that I get out of being in my creative work and passion. And I also can realize where it needs to be shut down because I also have something else that really matters to me. And I want to be in feminine energy, and I want to be soft, and I want to be in the things that I love and appreciate about the dynamic with my husband Ryan. And I'm not going to allow my mind to make up a story that that's not possible. Like I'm a co-creator with God, I'm a co-creator with source, spirit, and universe. And I'm going to quit living from a place of disempowerment and quit saying and just being mad and frustrated that I can't do anything about it. That's where I see so many people living from. Such a place of disempowerment. And I'm inviting people to be empowered and say, what if you can first identify where it is that your nervous system doesn't feel safe? And then what if you invited yourself, God, whatever, I don't care. What if you invited the opportunity for you to learn a new way to regulate your nervous system and to not have to change all these things external, but actually to shift internally? And then that caused the things that you're engaged with to be different. Wayne Dyer says, change the way you look at something, and the things you look at will change.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:47

That's the Ryan Lulf show for today. If your nervous system, if you feel so uneasy, if you're always stressed, if you have unnatural thoughts, if you're if you're going through something systematically within your system that you really can't dial down on, you've you've got to check Ryan out, his coaching, his technique, but the nervous system, it is the beginning and the end to healing and health. I truly believe that. I know you do too. Love it.