SPEAKER_00 0:17

Welcome back to the Coaching for Life podcast with Monty Williams and Will Davis, a conversation that we pray encourages you to pursue the Christ-centered life. And as always, it's a great joy to spend some time with my good friend and co-host, Mr. Monty Williams. And today, Monty, we're discussing what to do when life doesn't make sense. And the older we get, and we're getting pretty old, the more we realize that life isn't fair. Life is difficult. And as a young person, when things don't seem to go our way, you know, we tend to think that that's not fair. That's not right. That doesn't seem to make a lot of sense. And before we jump into God's word, generally speaking, why do we tend to have that me-centered attitude when life doesn't make sense? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:09

Well, I think I think first I want to make clear we, you and I, never want to minimize what someone is going through in terms of fairness, um, especially in life, because there are certain things that happen in life that uh you and I both know uh in our own situations or when we're looking at someone else, um, you just your heart cringes for them because you can see that this particular situation is just horrible. Um But I do know that there are times for myself um when I'm dealing with something that I think isn't fair, um there's a level of pride that comes into it because I'm looking at it through my own lens. Um in my life I've had things that have happened to me that, you know, quite frankly, when you add the the variables um up, they would go right into the category of that's not fair. Yeah. Um but there are times when I tend to look at things from from my own perspective, and um I don't see it from God's perspective. And that's where having um a relative level of um time in the word um minimum is so important in our walk with the Lord. And I I can refer to two verses that have been really um good for me, especially when I'm going through something pretty tough. Uh one is one of my anchors, and that's Proverbs 3, 5, and 6. It says, Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean. And that's the part where I I can get myself into a bit of a pickle on your own understanding in all your ways. In all your ways, and everything that you do, acknowledge him, and he will make your path straight. And that's, you know, those those phrases from those two verses are something or uh phrases that I tend to forget. And the and the other one is Philippians 2 uh 5 through 8, when we talk about humility, um our Lord and Savior, our God, Jesus Christ, uh the one who died for uh the wicked of the world, which is a category that I fell into and fall into. Um Philippians 2, 5 through 8 says, have this attitude in yourselves, which also in Christ Jesus, who, as he already existed in the form of God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but emptied himself. And you could just stop right there. There are times where we just have to um, even when we're going through tough times, um take the lens off of us and have, as Chuck Swindah uh so eloquently put as I was watching one of his shorts on YouTube, uh, having this vertical relationship that trumps the horizontal that we see in life. Because we might be right. Um there are times where life isn't fair, but having this vertical perspective in our relationship with the Lord and staying in God's word and having these anchors that allow for us to have confidence that God is in control, even when it may be unfair, uh, we can trust and rely on him and he will make our path straight.

SPEAKER_00 4:44

Yes. Those are two great verses to start with. Uh Proverbs three, leaning upon God, keeping that vertical perspective, as you just said. And then Philippians 2, as we pray for for more of the humility of Christ as we face whatever circumstances uh in life. And today we also want to look at a passage from the book of Daniel, and when we turn to Daniel 3, we see that the Jewish people were in exile in in Babylon. And the king of Babylon, Nebuchadnezzar, sets up this gold statue that is 90 feet tall, and he gives a command that whenever the people hear the sound of the horn or the flute or any other music, everyone must fall down, Daniel 3 5, and worship this image of gold. But when the music plays and it's time to bow down to the statue, three of Daniel's friends, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, don't bow down to the statue. And King Nebuchadnezzar hears about this and he summons these three guys and says, Is this true that you're not worshiping the golden statue? If you don't bow down, you will be thrown into the fiery furnace, Daniel 3.15. And then what God is there who can rescue you? And the three men answer in in Daniel 3.17, If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to rescue us from the furnace of the blazing fire. And he will rescue us from your hand, O King. And then here's the key verse of this passage. Daniel 3.18. But even if he does not rescue us, let it be known to you, O King, that we are not going to serve your gods, nor worship the golden statue that you have set up. So when life seems unfair, when we seem to have been dealt a difficult hand in life, we shouldn't try to take matters into our own hands. We don't escape to something that is false. We don't give up and give in to the culture. No, we cling to God's promises. We remember his faithfulness in the past and we trust that he will continue to be faithful in the future, despite whatever it is we are facing. And the story continues there in Daniel 3.

SPEAKER_01 7:23

Yeah. Yeah, we s we see that Nebuchadnezzar is hot. Literally, pun intended. And he ordered the furnace to be heated seven times uh hotter than usual. And it's interesting the seven times, you know, that's that that number seven in the Bible is um it describes complete. And so you can imagine like how hot uh this particular fire was. And he ordered his soldiers to tie up Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego and throw them in the blaze. And um this is uh an interesting uh not I mean it's interesting, but it's also like eye-opening in terms of what fairness looks like in terms of like I know I can get caught up in what I think fairness is. You read a story like this and you're like, wow, this is unfair. Yeah. Uh or you read a book like Fox's Book of Martyrs, and you understand, like, okay, that's not fair. Um but these these guys, um they they are so um convicted by uh the Lord. And and I'm when I was studying this, I was like, where does that come from? And the reference point uh goes back to Daniel 1 8. Yeah. Um their brother in the Lord. Um the Bible says, but Daniel resolved not to defile himself with the royal food and wine, and he asked the chief official for permission not to defile himself this way. And that's a foundational conviction that we see in the lives of these four individuals, but in particular these three, as they were thrown in the fire. And you just alluded to um two words that are pretty cool words in terms of music for me because I love Mercy Me. Yes. And they have a song called Even If. And it's when I think of, when I read these verses, I think of that particular song. Yeah. You know, even if you don't, my hope is in you, Lord. Even if you don't change this situation the way that I want it to be changed, my trust is in you. And that's what we see with these three individuals. That's what we see with people around the globe, whether it's missionaries in in Africa and in different places around the world that aren't on Fox or CNN, we see this even-if attitude that God, you have it. And that comes from a personal conviction, a foundational conviction that is um exemplified in Daniel 1.8. And I think that's something that as believers, um, many of us who struggle with trying to identify what's going on, having God's word as the anchor in our lives and and copying um these four individuals is something that we all should should strive for and try to live out every day.

SPEAKER_00 10:28

Yeah. And now we're looking at even if you know, even if you don't work according to how we want and how we think things should go, you know, God, God, you're still faithful. And another thing that we have to remember is we can't see all that God is doing behind the scenes. You know, we can only see the physical, that which is right in front of us. But in every situation, we remember that there is something spiritual taking place as well. There's a spiritual realm, there's a supernatural working that God is doing. And that made me think of another passage uh in 2 Kings 6 of Elisha. We read there that the Arameans were trying to capture the prophet Elisha, and Elisha's servant wakes up one morning and he goes outside and he sees that the Aramean army has surrounded the city with their horses and their chariots. And Elisha's servant comes back inside and he's terrified as he says to Elisha in 2 Kings 6, 15, This is hopeless, my master. What are we going to do? And we can all feel that hopelessness at times. And Elisha responds in verse 16, Don't be afraid, for those who are with us are greater than those who are with them. And then Elisha prayed in 2 Kings 6, 17 and said, Lord, please open my servant's eyes so that he may see. And the Lord opened the servant's eyes, and the servants saw, and behold, the mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha. So when life doesn't seem to make sense, when our situation seems unfair, and we look at the person next to us and say, well, look at all that that they have, and look at my situation, you know, God, that doesn't seem right.

SPEAKER_02 12:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:39

We have to realize that we can't see all that is truly going on behind the scenes, behind the veil, and we can't see his full plan and every aspect of his perfect will for our lives. And this was such a powerful passage how God peeled back the curtain just for a moment so that Elisha's servant could see that their situation was not hopeless. Greater are those with us than those that are with them. And I know that there are many other promises that we could share with the listener to encourage them in this area.

SPEAKER_01 13:16

Yeah. When you study the scriptures and and you listen to different teachers who expound on the word without their opinion, um, it's a powerful thing. And it it certainly is something that we can reference when we're going through tough times. When you feel forgotten or your situation seems unfair, you can hang on to Hebrews 6.10. The Bible says God is always fair. He will remember how you helped his people in the past and how you are still help helping them. You belong to God and he won't forget the love you have shown his people. When you feel your faith is being tested, James 1 2 says, God will bless you if you don't give up. When your faith is being tested, he will reward you with a glorious life, just as he rewards everyone who loves him. When you've lost hope, God reminds us in Jeremiah 29.11, I will bless you with a future filled with hope, a future of success, not of suffering. It's Jeremiah 29.11 in the CEV. When you need strength, Isaiah 41 10 says, But those who trust in the Lord for help will find their strength renewed. They will rise on wings like eagles, they will run and not get weary, they will walk and not grow weak. And there's other reminders. Um Revelation 21, 4, Habakkuk 3, 17 through 18, and 2 Peter 3.9. Like these are these are reminders of God's faithfulness when we're going through um times where we just we keep we're at the point of not coping. Yeah. You know, and and if you've lived long enough, um you've been there. Um but if you've walked long enough with the Lord, you know that He pro He provides strength and hope, um, peace. At times when you're you're when you're processing it, you're thinking to yourself, like, why am I this peaceful during this time? In the midst of chaos and pain, God can provide peace that is uh that surpasses understanding, and that that's a really cool thing.

SPEAKER_00 15:23

Yeah. And I I know we have some listeners that they've told me that they take notes and when they listen, and so yeah, we would encourage you to go back and and and write down these scripture verses, you know, look up these references on your own and and pray through them, meditate upon them. Yeah. Uh but some beautiful promises to hold on to.

SPEAKER_01 15:47

Can I add one more thing in terms of to complement our time in the Word and referencing these particular verses is to listen to God's music. Yes. You know, whether it's Mercy Me, um, there's so many renditions of the song Waymaker. You know, that that song is such a hopeful song. Like when you you don't think God is working, he is behind the scenes, uh, he is the scene, and he's he's he is the anchor, he is everything that we need, and he's the promise keeper. Yes, he's the light in the darkness, as that song says so well. It's one of those songs that when you're going through um a rough moment, it's a it's a pretty cool song. It it won't change your situation. There's no hocus pocus to this, but it does allow for us to have, as Chuck Swindah, um one of my favorite people of all time that I've never met, but I'm just like, man, I love that dude. He talks about this vertical perspective. Songs like that that complement the word allow for us to have that vertical perspective. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 16:58

No, that's good because when we feel like we can't see a way forward, we we we continue to cling to Christ, who is that way maker. And Jesus is that ultimate example of someone who was treated unfairly. Yeah. And he was completely sinless and blameless, and yet he suffered persecution and rejection for us. He he endured false accusations, illegal trials, severe beatings, and he went through unimaginable pain as he was crucified on a cross and he died for us in our place. By his wounds we are healed. Romans 5:8. But God demonstrates his own love toward us in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. He died, he was buried, the grave could not hold him, he rose again because of his great love for us, and it's because of his sacrifice that allowed us to be restored and reconciled to the Father. So when we feel like we've gotten the short end of the stick in life, you know, let's reflect on all that we have gained because of what Christ gave up for us. He died so that we might live. What are some other practical words of advice for the listener on this topic? Trevor Burrus, Jr.

SPEAKER_01 18:24

I I had an article that I read um from 2021 uh from Crosswalk magazine uh by a lady named Cindy McMeneman. And um the title was Realize, Rejoice, Remember. And those were the three points when we're going through um a tough time. Uh we have to realize that God sees it all. Uh nothing slips past him. Um the scripture says in in 2 Chronicles 16, 9, for the eyes of the Lord ranged throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him. We have to realize that that God is aware. He's omniscient, he's omnipresent. Um that's a vast we use those words, but when you think about it, I'm like, that's that's way past my thinking. You know, how can someone be omniscient? Yeah. How can someone be omnipresent? I can't fathom that, but we know that God is. Uh rejoice, even when there doesn't seem to be a reason to. Um 2 Thessalonians 5.18 says, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. There's no better way to show God a surrendered heart than to be thankful when things aren't going uh going the way that I want them to. And then remember that God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. James 4, 6 says, We need God's grace when we look around and see people who aren't living right. You know, that that we can be really judgmental when we look around and we see, like, why is this person uh getting what they want and they're doing this? It reminds me of Psalm 73 with Asaph, the prosperity of the wicked. Um but the Bible says they may seem to have everything, but they may not have you, Lord, and you are our greatest treasure. Yeah. And so that's you know, re realize, rejoice, remember. Um, those are just titles of an article, but nothing can replace the promises of God's word, the reminders of who he is, uh, the reminders of the vertical position that we should have, the reminders of Romans 5.8, that when we were in the most wicked uh position um in the history of the world, which is the position of being a sinner, he died for us. Those are reminders that give us hope, but those are they're also reminders of who he is and how much he loves us. And and even when we're going through um tough stuff. And gosh, man, I you and I have talked about some things that you and I have been through over the years, and and it's you know, I can't say with all confidence or any confidence that I've always had that kind of mindset when I'm going through a tough time. It's so it's so cool uh to have brothers and sisters around me to remind me that God is good, that he is aware, yeah, that he uh is the lifter of my head, that he died when I was a sinner. That's right. And his plan for me is good. That's why the the you know, when people talk about not going to church, um, especially people that are able, sometimes folks aren't able to go to church, but if you're able to go to church, the Bible's put pretty clear do not forsake the assembling of yourselves. There's such a beauty in that, especially when we're going through a tough time. Because we get these reminders of who God is and all the promises that we can hang on to when we're going through a tough time.

SPEAKER_00 22:08

That's good. Realize, rejoice, remember he is our greatest treasure. And we also remember promises like Psalm 84, 11, for the Lord God is a son and shield. The Lord bestows favor and honor. No good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless. God doesn't want to withhold things from us, but he may prevent things from happening in our life because he's got something far greater planned for us in the future. And you you can correct me if I if I get some of this wrong, but I but I remember you talking about how you had some coaching options. You were thinking about going to Dallas to coach with Avery Johnson. And you thought others were going to agree with that leaning, but both Ingrid and Coach Pop felt that you should go to Portland and coach alongside Coach Nate McMillan. And after prayer and talking about it, you realized that Portland was where you needed to go. And all of that time you thought that this was strictly a coaching business decision, but it was ultimately a spiritual one because God was using that time in Portland to grow you and your family spiritually. And so this idea of unfairness in our eyes is often not God withholding something from us, but perhaps he's protecting us and saving us for something far greater. Trevor Burrus, Jr.

SPEAKER_01 23:48

Yeah. It's an amazing thing to think about when you get past it and you look back on it and you see what God was doing. The Bible says in Psalm 139, 17, how how precious also are your thoughts to me, O God, how vast is the sum of them. And when I think about that time that you referred to, that's a reminder that his thoughts are way past what I want or what I think I should be doing. And I remember that time so clearly. And I was just getting into the coaching uh craft, and I got back from speaking with him in Dallas, and then I took a trip to Portland and I met with Nate McMillan, a person I'd I'd never met, um, competed against, but never met him. Yeah. And got back home and just told my wife, you know, we're going to, you know, Dallas. And she was, Ingrid at the time was like, I don't think we should do that. And I was like, what? You know, this is we can stay in Texas, you know. And she says, sweetheart, I've prayed about it. I think we should go to Portland. And I was like, Well, we're not. And so shortly after that, uh, I talked to Coach Pop. He had called me because he he heard I was on the rounds um talking to different teams. And he was like, Well, what are you gonna do? I said, Well, I'm gonna go to Dallas. And he was like, Well, I think you should go to Portland. And I was like, Oh my gosh, like, have you been talking to Ingrid? You know, but the God was working it out. Um, and when when I look at that verse, it it just speaks to, you know, how precious also are your thoughts to me. Like he thought so much of me and the growth that I needed to uh be a part of that he was working through my wife and working through Coach Pop to get a message to me that you need to go to Portland. Yeah. And we got to Portland, and it was the one of the best decisions that I did not make. I begrudgingly went to Portland, and it was a life-changing decision practically for my career. Um, I went as a second assistant, and five years later, I left Portland as the head coach of the New Orleans Pelicans, which changed the my career path. But from a spiritual perspective and from a life perspective, I got to be around uh believers in a way that I had never been around before. Uh guys like Gary Dozier, uh Jeff Young, um Roger La Vasa, uh Brett Meader, and um Eric Dobson, different guys that uh few of them are pastors, uh others are deacons and elders. And I'd never been around men um that studied the word like that. I I hadn't been a part of a church like Athe Creek Christian Fellowship, where uh they went to church on Sunday, they had Bible study on Wednesday, and throughout the week, you would you could find those guys at a Starbucks near you around the table, cracking open the word and just talking about God's uh scripture. And so that that particular time spoke to this this particular verse in Psalm 139. Um, how vast is the sum of God's thoughts towards us, so much so that um even in that time, I just didn't think it was fair. I thought, you know, Ingrid and Pop were kind of picking on me, and they weren't telling me about their plan. Ganging up on you. But God had worked it out, man, and it was it was a really cool thing. And that's that that lean knot. Yes. Um it was it was a really cool time for me to just trust people that I respected, especially my wife, who was who was way more mature in her prayer life and her study time, and and hearing more clearly from the Lord than I was. And um, I had to surrender and trust that she was doing what was best for us as a family, but also what was best for me uh in my growth in the Lord.

SPEAKER_00 28:08

And I know you recently got back to Portland and it just provided further confirmation that you know sometimes we don't realize until later on that, okay, God, I see what you were doing there. And in the moment we we we struggle with you know what God is doing in our lives, and and you know, we're human, we're not we're not robots, we all have feelings and and we can experience disappointment and heartbreak, but we cling to that truth that God's goodness will never change. He is a God of love and light. 1 John 1, 5 says, this is the message we have heard from him, and declare to you, God is light. In him there is no darkness at all. So any words of encouragement, again, to the listener who is feeling that they they got a bad shake in in life and they're feeling discouraged, and they think, okay, my life doesn't seem fair. Yeah. How can we speak a word of encouragement to them?

SPEAKER_01 29:27

I I think the the the privilege of prayer is something that um as I've gotten older um it's been not just a vehicle to talk to the Lord. It is a privilege to be able to go to God in prayer um on my knees, uh in my bed, in the morning when I study, walking around during the day, talking to Him about um where I'm at, uh being grateful for um the blessings we have, but especially in times where I'm just so overwhelmed. And and you know, if we had enough time today, as you and I have talked about, I have some things going on in my life right now that I'm just like, man, I never thought I would be here. But having um the privilege of being able to pray to God um it resets my position. Yes. Um it it it puts me in a place of surrender. It not necessarily changes the situation. I think I grew up with that paradigm, thinking that if I prayed, uh every situation would change based on my request. Um but what it has done for me was has given me this vertical position where I'm looking to him. But it's also forced me to humble myself and trust that he's in control, and whether it's a yes, no, or wait, I can trust that it's good for uh me and my family and the people that I love and the people that may not agree with um who I am or how we live and and and our faith. And so I I would encourage anyone who's listening to pray um first before you make an assessment about certain things. Now there are things in our lives that are pretty cut and dry and they aren't uh fair. But the the the ability to pray and talk to the Lord about it, there's a comfort there and there's a releasing of the situation, casting our cares upon him for he cares for us that is so um important to our walk. And what I've learned in 54 years, typically when I get past the situation, I can see God's hand in it, even if I don't agree. I can see what he was doing and what he was doing in me, even in a tough time. And that's still part of this particular journey that we have as we are being conformed into the image of his son day after day after day after day. And so I would encourage anyone who's going through uh a tough time uh to be in this posture of prayer and using it uh not just as a a uh a Hail Mary or a lifeline or uh the last resort. It should be our um a part of our our bag, our mix as the young kids. When we play basketball, everybody's talking about their bag of moves. Prayer should be in our spiritual bag um that we use on a daily basis because it certainly puts the focus more on the Lord and less on us and in the things we're going through.

SPEAKER_00 32:56

That's good. Uh the priority and privilege of prayer as we go before the throne of grace and and reset that vertical perspective with God. And and then I would I would add to that to find a brother or sister in Christ that that can encourage you and pray for you. And and I thank God that you know almost every morning at 5:30 a.m. I'll I'll get a some scripture from you or or I'll send something to you, and and just knowing that, okay, you've got somebody in the trenches with you that's that's helping to encourage you in your walk and that's also praying for you. And I I was reading last night in a book from Paul David Tripp about Paul wrestling with this question. Uh Paul David Tripp was wrestling with, okay, what do I do when life doesn't make sense? And his brother bought him a Bible and a yellow highlighter and challenged Paul, saying, This summer, read through the Bible and mark every instance of the sovereign rule of God over all things. And he talks about how it changed his life and it corrected some poor theology. And perhaps the listener can accept that same challenge as we're heading into the summer. Read God's word, and anytime you see an example of the sovereign rule of God, circle it, highlight it, and I think we will begin to see things less through our eyes and more through God's lens, his lens, our loving Heavenly Father, who is in control of all things. And we do want to remind the listener that we thank God for you, and we are praying for you, we're here for you, and let me pray right now for the listener. Lord, we read in your word in Isaiah 55 that your thoughts are not our thoughts, nor your ways are our ways, and as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are your ways and your thoughts greater and higher than ours. And so, Lord, we want to just rest in your perfect plan and your perfect purposes for us, and not try to get in the way of what you're trying to do in our lives and what you're trying to accomplish as you are making us more and more like your son Jesus. And Lord, we won't understand all the things that you allow in our lives, but we do trust and we cling to that truth that you are so faithful, you have been so faithful in our past, and we will trust you today, we will entrust our tomorrow to you as well. So, Lord, fill us with more of your peace and your promises when life doesn't make sense. We ask this in the name of Jesus. Amen. Well, thank you for spending some time with us today. And remember, whatever it is that you're going through, know that God loves you, He's for you, He's got a good plan for you, and we'll see you next time.

SPEAKER_01 36:37

Thank you for joining us at Coaching Life. And please subscribe wherever you receive this content.