The Business Cousins Podcast
We mix family and business!
The Business Cousins Podcast
You're not Overworked You're Over Commited
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Episode 11 Business Cousins Podcast
Still thinking about it, Amaya. There it is. There it is. There it is. Terrific Tuesday. What's up, business cousins?
SPEAKER_00Hello, business cousins.
SPEAKER_03It's yours truly, Ruth Heel at Tasha Cooper Ware on the Business Cousins podcast, where we do mix business and family. Man, she asked a great question. She she's I'm gonna let y'all know she's like the question concept person. Uh, are you overco overworked or overcommitted? And you're like, what does that mean? That's the same thing. No, overworked means you're just a little tired, but overcommitted, that's your fault. That's your doing too much.
SPEAKER_00And we let us say, like, oh, you're doing the most, you do too much, but it's not in business. Is it really getting it done?
SPEAKER_03If you're overcommitted, and uh so let's start with the definition. Well, oh no, let's start with the introductions. First time listening, Bruce Hill, your better questions coach, growing your business by teaching you to ask better questions, Tasha.
SPEAKER_00Yes, I'm Tasha Kabuare, CEO of HLS Collective, and I give you the answers to the things you probably already know, but just need to do when it comes to your wellness.
SPEAKER_02That might be the best one yet. Those get better every time.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I want y'all know this is a work in progress in business. This is my sixth year and um uh not a year of being an entrepreneur, but six years with this business, and one day at a time, like it's all a learning curve.
SPEAKER_03So and that's where if you haven't go back and watch episode one, go back and listen to it. If you just listen, if you're listening, you're I've got my don't make excuses make money shirt on, and my eyes are bright red. Yeah, they are the influence. Yeah, allergies.
SPEAKER_00I had to check y'all. I was like, oh, we having a good day, or we having a great day. What's happening?
SPEAKER_03It is an okay day. Uh I live in Georgia and spring, summertime, and then allergies kick my butt. Yeah, but I was wearing my no excuses shirt, so here, I'm here. Um, and I think the topic is good because there's things we want to show up for, there's people we want to support, and we might not have the band with, and we end up overcommitting. Um, how would you define overcommitting?
SPEAKER_00I would say overcommitting is when you don't have a good boundary on your nose.
SPEAKER_01Oh, you don't have a good boundary on your nose.
SPEAKER_00So you say yes to all things, everything, whether your schedule actually permits it, and it can be done well.
SPEAKER_03But Coach Tasha, I I don't I don't want to disappoint them. I I don't want to let them down.
SPEAKER_00But if you can't show up at your best, then you're gonna let them down anyway.
SPEAKER_03Oh, you gotta teach me where the sound effects are. Okay, wait, wait. If I don't show up as my best, I end up disappointing them anyway. Anyway, that was for somebody. If that was for you, I don't care when you listen to it. Go ahead and put a comment like that's for me. Yeah, that's that was for me. Can I can I put comments? You're gonna hear my my keyboard.
SPEAKER_00Yes, I mean, I think at the end of the day, when people they think they're gonna disappoint, but some of that is just negative self-talk in their head, they're creating it, they're not actually disappointing anyone. Someone is happy to just have five minutes of your time efficiently, then 30 minutes of your time distracted.
SPEAKER_03Five minutes of your time versus 30 minutes distracted. I'm guilty of that. I um hanging out with my auntie, and she's like, Bruce, always in front of that laptop. And I was working, like it was productive. I wasn't playing video games, but you know, it's 7 p.m. on a Wednesday, like be present. That that was that was for me. Yeah, okay, so I really want to help people. I don't want to disappoint them, but if I'm not showing up with my best self, I'm disappointed anyway. Um, showing up distracted. What else happens when we overcommit?
SPEAKER_00Things fall through the wayside. You start forgetting appointments, you start double booking, you're showing up exhausted and foggy minded, you didn't get to eat, you didn't do your stretches, you didn't drink your water, you didn't do any of the self-care stuff because you've overcommitted to someone else's things, as opposed to putting yourself in your alignment and making sure that you're leading the way, you're not just being tugged along.
SPEAKER_03Hmm. So, how do we actually I'm gonna ask you how do we avoid overcommitting? But let's go back. Why is this a point in business and our personal life?
SPEAKER_00It is in it is very important to learn this. And I've I've done it. I've done it. I read the I read the year yes by Sean de Rams, and I was yes, this, yes, and I'm like, wait a minute, I am on my laptop until 11:30. That's too late. I I have a whole husband that I would like to just kick in and watch a TV show with. I need to close it and be present. Um, but I think that in that space, especially if you're doing anything creative within your job, like even though I use science to create programs, I do have to get a little bit creative because of people's lifestyle. So you need some space to breathe. But if you're overcommitted, you can't get to that creative thought process when you when it's time to grow and it's time to scale.
SPEAKER_03That's it, that's it right there. It's not about doing too much. I think that looks different for everyone. So don't let someone playing smaller than you tell you you're too big. Okay. What we forget is rest is part of the success strategy. Um, shout out to uh one of my favorite um NTs. She says rest is a require uh requirement, not a reward.
SPEAKER_00Exactly.
SPEAKER_03And so when you're when you're overcommitting, when you should be resting, that's that's number one. If you're taking notes, that's number one. Have I rest today, this week? Um, then you can show up 100%. Okay. What else should we look out for that might be a uh an orange flag, a yellow flag? Is that what they're called? This might be overcommitting.
SPEAKER_00Um, when busy, busy can feel productive, but it's not always effective. So if you are one of those people that are like, I'm busy, I'm busy, I'm busy. Um everybody's busy. Everybody's trying to accomplish anything, is they're kind of on the busy side. So, how are you managing that?
SPEAKER_03You know what? I don't know if I can get this up here. Um, I've got a whiteboard here.
SPEAKER_00Okay, whiteboard.
SPEAKER_03That's one of my daily tasks on here. My handwriting, it fell while I was writing.
SPEAKER_00Um, we need a whiteboard, we need a whiteboard sponsor.
SPEAKER_03Oh if you produce office supplies, let us know. We're we're just going up. Um, yeah, and that's where I would be so busy and get nothing done. Um, and so one of my techniques is writing it down. So that's number two. Number one, ask yourself to do your rest. Number two, let me turn this into a master class.
SPEAKER_00Write it down, write it, and you can look at it and be like Yeah, and these days you can create it in in the chats and the clouds of the world, you can brain dump it on a Sunday, tell all the things you need to get done from Sunday to Sunday, and let it give you a game plan of how to knock it all out on one day. Then you can import it into a notion board. But now we're going real far.
SPEAKER_03But no, but let's talk, let's talk about it. All right, this is business because podcasts. We we want to put together your life and your business. I don't believe they're separate, they also shouldn't get it in the way of the other. That's another conversation. So, me, I like physical media. You knocking it out with Chat GPT, club, and you told me something else I hadn't heard of.
SPEAKER_00Notion, I like notion. I haven't heard of that one.
SPEAKER_03Uh something else uh we were talking last week. Um, it'll come, doesn't it?
SPEAKER_00It'll come.
SPEAKER_03Yes, there's lots of tools. How do I figure out which one's best for me?
SPEAKER_00So I was a pen and pad person for up until about I say December, when it was time to get a new a new one. And I said, Okay, I feel I've used this. There's gotta be a better way because now things have started to become compartmentalized. Where I have some on paper, I got some in my Google Drive, I got agenda coming from you over here. It needed to all live in one place, especially when I want to offboard it because I want to come take a couple days off.
SPEAKER_03You have to hold on, wait, wait. You take days off?
SPEAKER_00I do.
SPEAKER_03What does that mean? Like you guys are getting paid?
SPEAKER_00Yes, I like a schedule. I have a work schedule just like any other person who works for their PTL. I have a schedule set every week. And so when I create my to-do list, sometimes it does when I feel overwhelmed, I have to just drop it all and say, hey, give me a game plan. What needs to be done between Monday and this day? Here are some here were some um, what do you call it, uh, dates that have to be done. And then let it do it for me. And then I check the boxes. And I don't do that every week, but it is a good way to get off of the paper and then always have it because you always have your phone. But you could be in the street doing things and you won't have your paper, especially for the men, you don't carry a purse. Like even my women that like some do. Some people call it my man bag.
SPEAKER_03But I have a little pocket-sized one. Um, I don't know where I put it.
SPEAKER_00Do you carry it every day?
SPEAKER_03Uh yeah, yeah. If you if it's in my pocket, it's my on the go. But now that you mention it, at the end of the day, it's supposed to, it don't always happen. I'll go through there and I'll put it into the digital copy that list, my tasks.
SPEAKER_00So that's one step you can alleviate if you're already using technology all day, anyway. You may as well keep it in the palm of your hand and save yourself that it's all about getting back an hour a week. Like, where can you find the little things that can give you back some time? Because when you're an entrepreneur, you're doing all of the things, you have to always find tools to help you get back your time.
SPEAKER_03Man, okay. So you might have just answered it, but how does, whether it's Notion, you can use ClickUp, Google Tasks, use paper, just use some, we're tracking our activity to make sure we're productive. How does that help us? How does that stop us from uh overcommitting?
SPEAKER_00Live by the calendar. If it's not on there and it's not scheduled, um, the calendar tells you the truth.
SPEAKER_03It really does. But what if what if I'm adding things to the calendar? I keep putting things onto the calendar.
SPEAKER_00Well, that's where the structure and the boundaries come in. Like, what are your hours that you're supposed to be working? Like I said, about working at 11 o'clock at night. What is your all? What is your what time are you off? What time do you clock out?
SPEAKER_03That's a good one.
SPEAKER_00What time do you clock in?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, those folks that work from home, especially my freelancers, um, maybe working home or intertwined. People will call you just because you're at the house and be like, oh, let me move this couch. Can you no? I'm at work right now. That's good. That's that's good. Yeah, okay. What about those folks that don't like um you know, disappointing people? Like, oh, you know, it's it'll just take a second. Like, you help me hang these curtains, just a neighbor across the street, it'll take two minutes.
SPEAKER_00I mean, that's a people-pleasing issue. You know. I mean, so at some point, you you you have to know that you are liked regardless of what service you do for someone. Like, if they can't love you for the care, or you know what I mean.
SPEAKER_03No, I mean, if that's all it takes, oh, you didn't help me hang my curtains, we're not friends anymore. Blocked, maybe they didn't need to be in your life anyway.
SPEAKER_00Blocked, blocked, deleted, removed. Like, come on. Like, at a certain point, you can't you can't live your life like that, just doing what makes other people happy when it's inconvenient to your goals, that might be a better strategy than what they got going on. They won't even have a strategy. So I tell I tell some of my co-workers all the time, my co-workers as in partners, like, if you're the leader, you might have to lead, and they have to be okay with the no because they don't even have a strategy, they're still out there winging it, they're still out there trying to decide in their indecisiveness.
SPEAKER_03And that's man, you you talk to you.
SPEAKER_00You said that's you, I'm talking to you. Yeah, real nice. We need the leaders to lead, Bruce.
SPEAKER_03You look at January, February, March in my business activity. I did I did okay, but I was missing some some revenue goals, and I was like, Man, where am I missing this goal? So I wrote them down and I'm reflecting on this. It's exactly like you said, but now I can do it on purpose because you said it out loud, and that's why if you go back and listen to her intro, she's like telling you what you probably already know. But you need sometimes you just need to hear it outside your head, the voice in your head.
SPEAKER_00Yes.
SPEAKER_03Uh so I wrote it down. I was like, Man, this one thing I've been doing has generated most of the revenue for all this year. So, guess what I'm doing? This is the only thing I'm doing next month. Is that one thing? It's that one thing. I figured out that speaking, anytime I speak, I make money. Every time I open my mouth, I make money. So, guess what I'm gonna do? Talk that talk.
SPEAKER_00I know that's right. And you know what, and I'm working on doing that more often as well because the same thing happened to me. I'm like, if I just connect directly, whether it's through my through our podcast or whether it's online speaking to camera or whether it's sending those messages out to people that I know I want to connect with, and I know they probably want to connect with me, but I have to be the one to initiate it. Works, that's actually gave me some free time.
SPEAKER_03Oh, talk to me, free time. Okay, so you know what, man, I like how you're talking. I feel like you're the type of coach that's gonna be honest with me and help me get results. How do I work with you? How do we get in touch?
SPEAKER_00Oh, yes, easy. You can go to hlsfit.com and you can book a free consultation for 30 minutes, and we can talk business, we can talk wellness, we can talk nutrition, we can figure out what you're missing to get to the next level to elevate you to what you want the second half of your year to look like. We're already in Q2, we're starting Q2 tomorrow, and I can help with the strategy to get you there.
SPEAKER_03Did I get that right? HLS Collector.com.
SPEAKER_00Yep.
SPEAKER_03I love it. Man, I gotta I gotta give you a testimonial shout out. So I'll pray to the most high, my dad turned uh 70 last year, and he is in the second best shape of his life.
SPEAKER_01I love it.
SPEAKER_03We actually went and uh we didn't run the whole marathon, but he completed a race and on his for his 70th birthday, and I was like, Man, this is beautiful. And it was from working with you, right? He was he's gotta be consistent, he's got to do his part with your guidance, and he's he's healthy, he's happy, he's enjoying life. Uh, so if for anyone that's again, I want to do something different, get some different results this year, tap in HLScollective.com.
SPEAKER_00Yes, hit me up, DM me. You can find me not hard to find these days.
SPEAKER_03Easy to find. That's oh, that should be a topic for our next one being easy to find. Oh now we talk about overcommitting, um, right, and that's where we start doing things for others and it's an expense for ourselves.
SPEAKER_00Yep.
SPEAKER_03You have some big plans for this year. Well, so what are some things you're committed to, not overcommitted to this year?
SPEAKER_00Okay, so the difference between this year and last year is I've undercommitted to throwing events and having in-person things. Like that is a that is a commodity, however, everyone can have access, like I was doing prior to. So there's gonna be less events in person, but they're gonna be better curated, they're gonna be bigger. Like we just we just had a it's not just another ladies' brunch, we had 60 women show up in the room to kind of talk to all y'all who showed up. Yes, we had a great time. We line danced, we did poetry, we talked about perimenopause and menopause.
SPEAKER_03We had some conversations.
SPEAKER_00Oh, we had conversations, yes. We had from age 12 to age 91 in the room. Yes, yeah, so that was amazing. But what was the difference? I put all my energy into one as opposed to before. I had overcommitted to do my events every month, and I didn't, I did, and I did events every month for like 10 months straight.
SPEAKER_03Oh, you were overcommitted.
SPEAKER_00I was overcommitted. I was the definition of, and that was on top of all my client load, that was on top of trying to procure new corporate contracts. So I've dialed it back. I've been more discerning about what contracts I'm going after. I've been very clear. Nope, this is the event. If I'm added to an event, I will be a resource, but I'm not hosting it, I'm not leading it. Um, but what about you? What have you overcommitted this year or undercommitted? Where are you?
SPEAKER_03You know, I hadn't even committed.
SPEAKER_00You are I was just doing stuff. You're a free agent.
SPEAKER_03It's just vibes. So um, for for me, I've been reading uh shout out to uh Lamar Tyler, Ronnie Tyler. Um I've been reading the hidden revenue formula, and it talks about four core levers where we can grow our business. And one of them is just is telling more people. And it was it was affirming because I have a training I do on how to hear yes more often, and number one is telling more people. And so we talk about not being committed. I wasn't tracking how many people I was talking to, I wasn't tracking who I was talking to, what channel. So for April, my push is uh is gonna be to get out the better questions toolkit to the targets 300 people. Okay targets 300 people uh because even converting at 10 that's 30 new clients, that would be a record-breaking month for me. So uh I've committed to that one thing. I'm just gonna share the better questions toolkit. That's all I'm doing for April. We're gonna look at the numbers and we're gonna reevaluate for May. So I'm excited. I'm glad you asked that question.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I mean, it sounds like you've set some boundaries, and that's that's your strategy. You're gonna do that one thing. Don't want to do that. You figured it out. Yes, I mean, I'm doing that same thing. We're having one challenge. April, the end of April, I'm starting a challenge, so you guys can tap in on that. But I am committed to I have my numbers set as well. Like if you just do the thing, but that means saying no to other that's a tough one for me.
SPEAKER_03Because I like I like doing things, I like going places and helping people. Um, I remember last week, I was like, okay, this is the last one. I drove from Atlanta to Nashville, it's about four hours. Did a whole workshop, taught a segment, had dinner, and then drove back. Why would you do that? Wow, go to bed.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah. It's interesting. I've watched my my dad is a good example of wanting to be helpful, but he makes it he's retired. But somehow it still gets split over four days. That one thing he said he was gonna do, but it's so that it doesn't get ridiculous or his time lie.
SPEAKER_03I might be able to take a lesson from that, you know.
SPEAKER_00I've watched it. One day I got a ladder over here, next day was a toolbox, next day was a light. Day four, light went in, hugs were given. Goodbye.
SPEAKER_03Four days to change the light bulb is wild.
SPEAKER_00Oh, it was a rec it was a recess light, so he did have to like pull it out.
SPEAKER_03Oh, you gotta do all sorts of stuff.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, he's a he's a master electrician, so it wasn't like uh he knew what he's doing, and he taught me how and he taught me how to do it.
SPEAKER_03Oh, okay. Passing it on. Yes, that's a conversation about generational wealth, it's not the money. Oh no, which what do you pass on?
SPEAKER_00I paid him in turkey wings. I paid him in turkey wings.
SPEAKER_03That's a good deal.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, he won't take money.
SPEAKER_03So he spread, man. That's a lesson. Let's make that number three. So, number one, did you rest? Number two, write it down. Number three, look on your time schedule. Yeah, I think that's a really good one because you'll find that real fast. They say, Oh, can you help me? I don't know why. Maybe I need to put up some curtains. You help me put these curtains, yeah. Absolutely. When I come off of work, you know, I get off work at six, I'll come right over. I'll help you. And they're like, Oh, I'll just do it myself.
SPEAKER_00Good idea. Okay, it's a good idea because sometimes people want you to do things that they can do themselves.
SPEAKER_03This would be record-breaking, clippable. Sometimes people want you to do things they can do themselves. Yes, so this whole time you're thinking, like, man, I'm indispensable, I gotta help them, I don't want to disappoint them. They could have done it themselves, yeah. You're stressing yourself out for nothing.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, there's a book called Codependency, Codependency No More, and that's a it's a codependency mechanism that you the need to feel needed when it really they can just do it themselves.
SPEAKER_03Are we talking about codependency? What kind of business podcast is this?
SPEAKER_00You know, it's a wellness business podcast, mindfulness, mental health, it all matters. You will have better business if you mind your wellness.
SPEAKER_03I think we can wrap it up right there. Absolutely, we will have better business if you have better wellness. So, listen, if you're like, Man, I need to I need to take care of me so I can take care of my business, tap into hlscollective.com, schedule an introduction with the team. Let's make this the best year yet.
SPEAKER_00Absolutely, we're on the way.
SPEAKER_03All right, episode number 11, y'all. We're excited. We it's up. We're consistent here. Um, look for the audio podcast on all of your favorite platforms here in the next 48 hours.
SPEAKER_00Yes, we're moving on up. Thanks for coming, guys.