Why that sin that you are hiding is killing you (Ep. 22)

Why do we hide our sins? What happens when secret sin is left to grow in the dark? In this episode, Pastors Chris and Tony have an honest conversation about the spiritual danger of concealing sin, the isolation it creates, and the damage it can do to faith, relationships, and conscience. Drawing from Scripture and the comfort of the Gospel, they discuss why sinners resist bringing things into the light, the burden guilt places on the conscience, and the freedom Christ gives through confession and absolution.

The conversation explores the difference between worldly secrecy and Christian repentance, the blessing of confessing sins to God and speaking honestly with trusted fellow believers, and how the Church can respond to struggling sinners with both truth and compassion. Above all, this episode points listeners to Jesus, who does not expose sin in order to destroy sinners, but to forgive, restore, and bring them back into the light of his grace.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:02

It's late at night and the person is scrolling on his phone in bed. Temptation arises because he knows no one else knows what he's about to do. He can continue to scroll through social media as the algorithm builds up and brings what he wants to see. He can turn on incognito mode and search out the websites that he wouldn't want others to know he's going to. When the person is all alone, she looks around and she sees that no one else is there and she can commit the sins that she wouldn't want others to know about. There is something about the darkness of secrecy that leads people to feel freedom in committing sin. They want to hide their sins and they want to move forward in them. Today we want to talk about the uh folly of hiding your sins from other people. Although that might be our desire, and that may be the whispers that the devil brings to us that the worst thing is that other people would know about your sins. We're going to talk about how wrong that is and how damaging that can be for us as Christians to try to keep our sins secret. My name is Chris Flughaft. I'm the pastor at Grace Lutheran Church in Yorbalinda, California. I'm joined by Tony Flugeft, my twin brother. He's also the pastor at Christ the Vine Lutheran Church in Temecula, California. And this is Double Portion, a podcast in which we talk about the intersection of studying scripture and living out our Christian lives. As we start this out, do you have thoughts that you would like to share?

SPEAKER_00 2:30

Yeah. I I think there's a lot that we could talk about, and and I think maybe right away getting into the motivation why someone might want to hide their sins. I I think the biggest reason is probably our ego. Um we we don't want people to think worse of us, so we we want to keep battling in through it on our own. Um I I think that there is that legitimate um struggle on in many cases where it's not someone who who is just embracing the secrecy and doing whatever they want. There is that internal struggle often where it's they they know that this is wrong. It's that Romans 7, the good I want to do this I don't do, the evil I don't do what uh this I keep on doing, what a wretched man am I. Um and and they have that struggle, but they haven't taken it to that point of severity of their sin, knowledge of the severity of their sin, of of what we hear in the Sermon Amount of like if this causes you to sin, cut it off. And so they're kind of in that in-between where they they understand it's wrong and and they struggle with it, but at the same time, they they maybe don't really want to give it up. And so um there's I think there's a couple things. There's um not telling other people because you don't want them to think worse of you, uh not telling other people because fear of punishment, uh, what might happen, um, and not telling other people because maybe they don't really want to give it up. And so I I think there's really those three things that ego, uh, there's that the fear of of justice and discipline, and then there's the love of sin that lead an individual to want to continue in that secret sin. I I noticed kind of with your beginning illustration, um perhaps what you're saying leads more towards sexual sin, which is a very big part of this in our world today with the abundance of pornography, but not just um flat out like pornography, uh anything that's um leads towards lust and sexual immorality is a big part of this because uh social media and the internet is inundated with all of this. And so that is a very big part of this conversation, but I don't think it's just sexual immorality. Um when we're talking about secret sins, we could also talk about those those thoughts that people have, those those feelings that they have that they know are wrong, but they they aren't gonna give up. And maybe it's that withholding forgiveness from another, uh, it's that that hatred of a brother or sister, it's that that grudge that that they cling to. And so it doesn't have to just be sexual sins, which I think is a very appropriate conversation because of the the secrecy of being online, or at least the perceived secrecy of being online. But um if someone were to watch us and think, oh, well, I don't struggle with internet porno use, well, secret sins are not limited to that.

SPEAKER_01 5:43

Yeah, so we can recognize that secret sins, there's a temptation to conceal not only from our neighbor but from God many of our sins, and it can be a variety of different uh variet a variety of different types of sin that you might fall into. Uh now I as we think about what leads a person to desire to hide uh his or her sins, uh, I'm thinking that part of it is tied to the conscience. So we know there are those natural knowledges of God, which are creation and conscience, and the law written on our hearts testifies to the truth of who God is. Uh but the sad thing about the conscience is that it can be seared and it uh can also be misused and misunderstood as you approach these things. Uh so then when we recognize that something is sinful and wrong, uh what can happen is a person could can grow fearful, and then in their fear, desire to hide this sin from other people, rather than recognizing that the proper thing is for the sin to be confessed and revealed, and for the forgiveness of Christ Jesus to be brought to them, and uh how that so often uh effectually is brought to us is through other people. So they have this uh strife of conscience that says, I know that what I'm doing is sinful and wrong, uh, but then I'm afraid of what's gonna happen uh if other people hear about this. So then they have that fear that leads them to hide these sins.

SPEAKER_00 7:38

Yeah. And I I think that is a worthy conversation when we consider uh what other people hearing about this looks like. Um like how much disclosure is necessary. Uh, do you need to tell everyone about all of your deep dark thoughts? Well, of course not. Um, this doesn't mean that like from the pulpit I'm gonna talk about every sinful thought I've ever had. That's not a good idea. Uh at the same time, there's gonna be value in having someone you can confess your sins to, who you can talk to about your struggle. And and maybe we can hold off on that for a moment. Um, but I do want to maybe just provide that caution that this doesn't mean that like I need to tell everyone every time I do something sinful or every time I have a sinful thought. Um at the same time, you you're talking about like this this fear of punishment. I think the classic biblical example is is David, King David and Bathsheba, and David is understandably afraid of getting caught in his sin with Bathsheba, and so then he continues to cover it up. And I think that can be the danger of secret sins, is that um the reason that it's kept secret is that we don't want people to find out, and then we need to continue to try to cover these things up. And when you're continuing to cover it up, that's not just a sin of weakness. That's not the Romans 7 struggle. That's willful, deliberate sin. And when we are in the conversation of willful and deliberate sin, that's when we need to look at Hebrews chapter 10. And and we have that passage that we so value, let us not give up meeting together somewhere in the habit. As that goes on, it says, if if we deliberately um give into sin, there's no sacrifice left. And and so sin, persistent willful sin is dangerous. It can can kill faith, it is inconsistent with the life of faith. Romans 6 says that we are dead to sin, how can we live in it any longer? And and so I like to use this illustration of cognitive dissonance. I remember learning about this in the communication class, and it's this idea that your thoughts and your actions can only be at odds for so long. Eventually something's gotta give. Either your thoughts are gonna change, your thoughts and beliefs, or your actions. So if you believe something is wrong, but you're doing something else, um, that seared conscience. Um, it's uh a psychological way of speaking of it. Um, so give the example. Um, someone believes that we use uh lust is wrong from scripture. Jesus says so. Well, they continue to lust after men or women on the internet. Uh eventually something's gotta give. They're gonna play those mental gymnastics to justify what they're doing. Um, that cognitive dissonance. You can only live with that dissonance for so long until something changes.

SPEAKER_01 10:52

Yeah, and I think tied to that, it's important for us to uh talk about the fact that impenitence is unbelief. That if a person continues impenitently in sin, uh then that will destroy that person's saving faith. Uh and that's when it ties to Jesus talking about the last day, and many will say, Lord, Lord, and I will say, I never knew you. Uh so just because someone can open their mouth and articulate the truths of Scripture doesn't mean that that person has saving faith. And as Lutherans, we get a little bit uncomfortable about this conversation, but it's something that we have to recognize that a person who continues willfully and maliciously and intentionally in sin uh is doing something that is not in line with saving faith. And at a certain point, uh we have to recognize, like it says in Matthew chapter 18, that that person is not part of us. And if you're reflecting on yourself, if you're continuing in that, uh there should be a severe warning that is communicated with you.

SPEAKER_00 12:11

Yeah, I was I remember talking with someone recently about this struggle of continued sin in the life of a Christian, and and how do we speak about this? And I said ultimately it comes down to a proper distinction of law and gospel. This is that key hermeneutic for reading scripture. And so the conversation really depends who we're talking to uh and and what's going on. So there's the Christian who claims to be a Christian, uh, who thinks that they can just continue to sin and sin and it doesn't matter to that person. We need to preach the fullness of the law. That Hebrews 10, like, if if you think that um you can keep sinning, you're you're deceiving yourself. So Hebrews 10, like, deliberately keep on sinning, there's no sacrifice left. First John chapter 1 has this encouragement. Um starting with verse 3, we know that we have come to know him if we keep his commands. Whoever says I know him but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in that person. But if anyone obeys his word, love for God is truly made complete in them, this is how we know we are in him. Whoever claims to live in him must live as Jesus did. Dear friends, I'm not writing you a new command, but an old one which you have had since the beginning. This old command is the message you have heard, yet I'm writing you a new command. Its truth is seen in him and in you, because the darkness is passing and the true light is already shining. Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates a brother or sister is still in darkness. Um and and so this this is very strong language um saying that if you continue to live in these sins, um you're you're a liar. You're making God into a liar, you're a liar. This is just not compatible with the life of the Christian. So to that Christian um who claims to be a Christian, who is living in sin, that warning is thrown out there with its full force. And then to the person who understands their sinfulness, and and so the person who's perhaps listening to this right now, and they're saying, like, is that me? I I sin. That's where we preach the gospel. And that's where we talk about uh the confidence of uh the doctrine of universal objective justification, the fact that Jesus died for the sins of the world. Uh that's where we um talk about the confidence of baptism, 1 Peter 3, 21. Uh, this water symbolizes baptism that now saves you also. Uh not the removal of dirt from the body, but the pledge of a clear conscience toward God. It saves you by the resurrection of Jesus Christ. So that word pledge there is not our pledge to God. It is a pledge from God to us. Um, it is a deed that proves what is true, a certificate that proves what is true, that we are we are saved, that we are forgiven. It is a gift that that gives what it promises, the forgiveness of sins. It's not a removal of dirt from the body, but um, but it washes away our sins. And so um another just real quick baptismal thought with that, uh it's not that baptism symbolizes something, but it's that the water of the flood symbolizes baptism that saves you also. And so the just as the flood waters drown the sinful world and saved Noah and his family, baptism drowns our sinful nature and saves us. So to the Christian who is worried, they they are understanding their own sinfulness, we preach the fullness of the gospel, uh our salvation through Christ and Him alone, the fact that He died for all of our sins, we have received these wonderful blessings. And so that can be kind of a struggle, I think, for Christians sometimes of uh kind of feels like we're ping-panging back and forth. Um, but this is really that hermeneutic of scripture. And and so um this warning about secret sin, right now we're throwing it all out there because the answer to sin is not to downplay sin. The answer to sin is not to act like it's not a big deal. Uh the answer to sin is is Jesus. And so we need to understand just how serious our sins are, just that we need to understand the depths of our sinfulness. That's that Romans chapter 3. Um sin makes us conscious. Uh Romans 3 20, sin makes us uh the law makes us conscious of our sins. It's that mirror. I'm exposed towards and all. And so that's what we need to do when when we talk about sin. And then also uh when we understand the seriousness of our sinfulness, that's when we understand just how incompatible it is with the life of faith to say thank you to God. And so we're throwing it out there in its fullness, not to give that impression that we need to save ourselves, but to say this is just how serious that sin is.

SPEAKER_01 17:15

And I wonder if in our culture, uh, one of the things that can lead people to uh hide their sin rather than flee from it is that lack of understanding of the seriousness of sin. Uh so in in the scriptures, uh sin is spoken of in a few different ways. Uh we have in the the Greek thought with the word uh of sin is kind of missing the mark. And sometimes that understanding can be abused to think like, well, I'm just not quite doing what I should have done, right? I did get a bullseye while I was shooting my arrow, but I still hit the board. And so then people can use it or abuse that. I think it can be helpful for us if we think more about the old testament uh ceremonial codes of cleanliness and uncleanliness, and how uh when you're unclean, you couldn't come to the temple. And how what that communicates to us is that sin separates you from God. Right? So sin is not something that you just you just did and whatever, it's small. Uh I can hide it, I can keep it in my life, but this is something that separates you from God. A person who was unclean could not come to the temple, they could not go to where the sacrifices are. So uh when we have sin, we have something that separates us from God. And what I want to do to think about that that a little bit more is to think about the uh the leprosy case in the Old Testament. Because sometimes we think about leprosy and we think, man, that must have been just this horrible disease if those people had to be separated from society. But then you read through Leviticus and you see, well, actually, it seems like there's a lot of other things that weren't that big of a deal that were lumped in with leprosy. Uh why? Because it's communicating how serious sin is. It wasn't about how deadly leprosy is, it was about how serious sin is. And sin keeps you away from God. And so I think that can help us understand how we can't just hold on to sin and have our little pet sins that no one knows about, but I still do that in my spare time while I am still united with God.

SPEAKER_00 19:40

I think that's also helpful in another way to understand just how deep our sinfulness is. Because I think often when we think of confessing our sins, we think of like an enumeration of each little transgression that I've committed. But when you think of the um clean versus unclean distinctions, there were things that were frankly unavoidable, particularly for women. Uh one example about um their time of the month would make them unclean. Um, childbirth would make you unclean. Uh, there's just things that are unavoidable. You interact with a dead person, all these things, unavoidable in life, and that makes you unclean. So one of the things that um that really communicated to was it wasn't about doing all the right things to make yourself perfect. Like you could not do that. And so Hebrews communicates to us that um in order to be made truly clean, there needs to be the shedding of the blood of our Lord Jesus Christ. Uh um the sacrificial system was communicating that uh for the forgiveness of sins, there needs to be the shedding of blood. And so I think it helps us to see just how serious sin is, because sin separates us from God. Like Genesis 3 uh thoughts, like they hide from God when they sin. Um, sin separates us from God. At the same time, it also helps us understand that it's not just about like each individual transgression, and then if I just like take care of the sin and the sin and then this and then I'm good enough, then I'm righteous of my own account. It doesn't work that way either. Sin is an inherited condition, and and so that doesn't excuse it away at the same time. Um, it is much deeper than I think many of us understand. So not only are our sins um are each individual sins more serious than we might think, but our sinful condition is deeper than I think we we really understand. And so we're confessing not just our individual sins, but our our sin broken condition from which we need saving.

SPEAKER_01 21:42

Yeah, and I think to tie to that, something that can be important to discuss is that uh sometimes there can be a mindset from Christians that dismisses certain things as not sinful, which are. It's kind of like, well, as long as this doesn't hurt other people, it's not that big of a deal. Or uh there there are even uh Christian groups out there which uh don't categorize sins of thought as sin. So when we're talking about uh these sins, w we're not saying, hey, this is just something you do that it is sinful, but it's also the thoughts that you have that are sinful. These things that uh other people couldn't possibly know are these sins that we want to be aware of how how damaging they are.

SPEAKER_00 22:36

Yeah. One of the things I was thinking about that I came up in a Bible class recently. Um someone was asking if if essentially it was breaking of a a small legal code was was sinful. And um kind of talking about the the nuance of well, like what's enforced versus what's the law. Sometimes these things can get kind of complicated. So using the example of a speed limits, uh it seems to be understood that if you're going five miles per hour over the speed limit, you're not gonna get pulled over. And then to add on top of that, like my driving instructor as a teenager told me it's actually safer to drive the speed limit, and he'd like encouraged people not to drive above the speed limit, and encourage people not to stay at the speed limit. And and so then there's kind of conflicting points. Okay, so let's say that that per that Christian who consistently um speeds five miles over, uh, are they living in a state of unrepentant sin and now they're going to hell? And that was kind of the conversation. And and so um that's where I do want to discourage from this idea of like um turning it into a works righteous game of like, okay, I need to do all of these right things to save myself. So if I just own like if I make sure that I'm only doing like the speed limit, then I'm gonna save myself. Um and and that that's I think there's we need to understand this freedom in this to um like as that advice, and to sin boldly. Not that like we just do whatever we want, but we we we do understand like sometimes we might make the wrong decision, and there is grace and forgiveness for that. Like, I not that I'm intentionally making the wrong decision, but I'm weighing it. I'm being thoughtful and saying, like, um there's there's books, there's there's um for example, one of the examples I used was um uh solicitor's license for a church. So do we need to get a solicitor's license to hand out flyers for a church? And there was one person in the city that thought maybe we're supposed to, the law code itself was ambiguous, and the sheriff's department said no. What do I what do I do there? And and so um just okay, if I make that decision and it turns out actually, like I was wrong, I was sinning, I should have been doing the other one, or whatever. Does that mean that I'm then going to hell because I was continuing to sin um in ignorance? And I I do think there is value in some of those classifications, and our Lutheran dogmaticians have used some of these terms about like um like persistent and willful sin versus sins of weakness. Um, like there is some difference, and we don't want to take that too far and act like sin doesn't matter, but there is some difference that's worth acknowledging where a Christian is going to um just do their best to the glory of God and live in the confidence of the forgiveness of sins. But then it's that distinction between law and gospel that we um the if someone's gonna take that and say, the great dog get to not think about anything and just do whatever I want. No, no, no, no. Um willful sin kills faith. If the person's particularly sensitive, um, and they're like, I I ate a candy bar that maybe wasn't supposed to be sitting out for free, and I thought it was free, was like, um, okay, there's we're forgiven in Christ. Um, I it's that just that constant, uh, proper distinction of law and gospel that isn't always satisfying to us because I I think there's part of us that wants just that clear, like always like here's the answer, but it it depends on the circumstances and the person and their attitude and what's going on and their intentions.

SPEAKER_01 26:46

Yeah. And I think it's important for us to recognize no one can enumerate all of their sins. And that's part of why the Lutheran confessions, when they give encouragement on public or private confession and absolution, uh to not require the enumeration of sins because it's impossible. Uh when we are people who uh are everything we do is contaminated by sin, it's going to be impossible for us to go through our life and uh r recognize every sinful thing we did. And that's when we do rest in the forgiveness and the love of Christ Jesus, as those who have been washed by his blood, as those who have been given a guarantee of a good conscience through baptism, uh, and then to think of the truth of justification. Now I don't want to go too far with what I'm about to say because I recognize that justification and forgiveness uh are two sides of the same coin, and we don't want to overly divide justification and the forgiveness of sins. But if you you think about the fact if you have an improper approach to trying to avoid sin, uh even if you never sinned, if that were possible, you would be still lacking in true righteousness. Uh right? So as we approach God, we completely are dependent on what He gives us. He gives us the forgiveness of sins, He gives us Jesus perfect life. So we would never want to take this conversation about avoiding secret sin to approach and say, like, hey, this is somehow if I uh avoid these sins, I'm gonna be able to approach God on my own. Of course not.

SPEAKER_00 28:32

Yeah. I mean it's it's very clear Romans 3, Galatians talks about this, like Romans 3, um uh justified freely apart from the works of the law. Galatians talks about like if you want to make it about the law, like you've alienated yourself from grace. Um, so we're we're of course upholding that, and it's it's not about saving ourselves through the works of the law, but understanding just how serious sin is and wanting to flee from temptation, flee from evil, not walking in the ways of the wicked, but but um walking the ways of of the righteous, uh walking in the steps our saviors trod, and following him as as an example. And it's one of those interesting things that I I feel like I've really grown in my walk of Christian Christian faith and understanding, where I used to really be uncomfortable with the the phrase www. And I would even teach that. And I still like kind of agree, like maybe instead of saying www. Um wait, W D J D, what did Jesus do? Instead of what would Jesus do. Um, I think that's more valuable to point something to like, what did Christ actually do for you? And that's that example, instead of like hypothetically, what would Jesus do in this situation? But I I I think that perhaps I was too strong in my speaking against it, because the reality is that the Bible does hold Jesus as an example. That I mean, that's what I read from 1 John chapter 1 before. We we hear it all over the epistles, Jesus as example, and Jesus' example does not get rid of Jesus as savior. And so to um to hold those two thoughts against each other is just naive, I suppose. Um it it's it's failing to speak the way scripture speaks. Um, and and that's the problem that I think um Lutherans can can fall into is uh theology by sloganeering. I've heard this critique a lot recently. And I think that's it's a completely fair point because if if we're so insistent upon um speaking in a way that doesn't let us talk the way the scriptures talk, uh perhaps the way we're we're thinking is really a caricature of what what we actually believe and teach. And and so if you spend enough time in the epistles, you see Jesus' example, you see this incompatibility of the Christian and sin. Uh you you see these exhortations for Christian living. And so we shouldn't shy away from that. And I understand there's the sensitive conscience, and that's why we did provide those cautions before, and we keep preaching the gospel because we cannot assume the gospel, we cannot merely apply the um imply the gospel, we need to preach the fullness of the gospel to to sinners. And there's also this value in saying they're not hearing the gospel anywhere else, and the gospel's not just for conversion, it's for believers to continue to hear. At the same time, we need to teach the full counsel of God. All scriptures, God breathing is useful for teaching, rebuke, and correcting, and training in righteousness. And so there is the value of rebuking, correcting, and training, and we can't neglect those either. So we need to talk about sin and what the Christian life looks like as we flee from sin, temptation, and evil and take this very seriously.

SPEAKER_01 32:11

Although we wouldn't take away the culpability of sin from the sinner, uh, one thing I I might think kind of tying this back to uh why people might keep their sins secret, uh there could be some fault on us as pastors in that we don't talk to them about the seriousness of the sin. So we saw already that pride could be a reason that people hide sin. We saw already that fear of earthly punishment and consequences could be a reason people hide sin. We talked about a failure to recognize uh the seriousness of sin could lead to that, but then perhaps the failure of people within the church to talk about the seriousness of sin. Uh so you you have someone who is engaged in something that is uh not in line with the identity of being a Christian, uh with the with who we are made in the Holy Spirit, but then that person just doesn't get a message from people within the church telling them like that is not right, that is wrong. The world tells them that's fine, but then their their pastors never talked about it. Uh their parents never talk about it.

SPEAKER_00 33:36

Or if the pastor does, he preaches like this is sin, but don't worry, like you like you're forgiven, and then you should live this life, but but you're gonna fail anyways. And with the way that it's presented, is like, uh, yeah, it's sin, but it's not that big of a deal. And it's not the way that a um parent would teach their child. And and so we're obviously um rightfully uncomfortable with being called father um because like Jesus talks about you only have one father, but Paul takes on that language of like being a spiritual father towards people. Peter is um kind of like a spiritual father to Mark, and and so uh this idea of like father, I think, can be helpful. Like if you're talking with your child um and they're doing something that's harming them, you're you don't say like oh stop, but like it's like it's it's okay. And and if you do it again, it's not that big of a deal. Like, no, stop. That's dangerous, don't do that. Or even if you're just teaching your children to be like a good person, um, you're not like well, it's okay. Just like that's gonna happen sometimes. Like they your kid goes and takes a cookie from the cookie jar when you told them not to. Um, you don't just like, no, don't do that again, but you you're gonna, and it'll be okay, and you're forgiven. But don't do it again, but like it's okay, like you're gonna. Um, sometimes the way that we present these things gives the impression that the sin is not serious. And so you're talking about like that that individual. Maybe it's um uh living together before marriage. So um this is sinful for a handful of reasons. Uh we are called not to give a hint of sexual immorality, that's giving a hint of sexual immorality. Um, we we are called um to keep the the marriage bed pure. Um there's a pretty good chance that they're not keeping the marriage bed pure in that situation, but also companionship is a gift given for marriage, and it's taking that gift outside of where God has has given it as a blessing. And how many times do churches just kind of ignore it? And then the the pastor goes on and and does the wedding because it's like, well, it's kind of we're gonna make it right, but the the sin was never addressed, and actually it was actively ignored.

SPEAKER_01 35:58

Yeah, if it's like a don't ask, don't tell situation, like even if you're in a church that recognizes this is sinful, but then the idea is the pastor's never gonna ask if you're living together right now and you're not gonna tell him. Well, that's keeping that sin secret, and that that is hardening people potentially. Uh, and we recognize that uh one of the potential fruits of faith uh of a person who recognizes that sin and recognizes the forgiveness in Jesus is to get married. Uh however, uh marriage is not always a demonstration of that fruit of faith. Right? So if they they live together, they get married, and no one ever says I was wrong and ever talks about it, uh, well then you do have a serious question about these things.

SPEAKER_00 36:50

Yeah.

unknown 36:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 36:51

So I I think I don't know exactly how completely connected we are still to the secrecy of secret sin, but I think it's just it was a worthwhile conversation about sin. But if kind of getting back to that that main thought about secret sin and and why we might we might um look to keep our sins secretive, I think we've addressed a lot of it. Um that that idea that you brought up that the church maybe has failed in showing people how serious sin is.

SPEAKER_01 37:20

Um there's that's the lowercasey church, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:24

Right.

SPEAKER_01 37:24

That's the local congregations, not the uppercase C.

SPEAKER_00 37:28

Um the idea that maybe they are there's that ego that they don't want people to think worse of them. Um maybe there is that fear of punishment, because hey, there is actually um a problem here, or maybe it's just that that love of sin. I think these things can all um lead someone to think that sin that that their sin is okay to keep secret or or or at least not that okay, but they're just gonna do it. Um I did you want to add some?

SPEAKER_01 37:58

Yeah, I was gonna I was gonna ask if you have any thoughts about how people might keep sin secret. So I was thinking how do we let's make this really practical and just yeah kind of give some thoughts as to how people might keep their sins secret. Like uh are are there things that people are doing, are are there ways that people are hiding their sins from other people?

SPEAKER_00 38:22

I mean the big one sexual immorality. I think there's people who are watching TV shows that are um blatantly sexual immoral uh sexually immoral. Um one of the examples that I'll use is uh Game of Thrones. I I tried watching one episode and there was so much nudity, and um that could certainly cause a Christian to lust, and perhaps they're just telling themselves, I like this show because of the plot. And maybe there's a good plot, I've never watched it, but they really um are are taking advantage of lusting after the other. So it could just be like, it's it's not pornography. Like it legitimately is not. Like it's not they're not going to some CD website to watch this, it's on Netflix. Um or whatever. Uh Game of Thrones, I don't think it's on Netflix, but maybe there's that one show that was popular um that was notoriously sexually more hunt hunting. A hunting game. Some it doesn't matter. There was a show on Netflix that was notoriously sexually immoral. There's shows like Fantasy Island and stuff that are built on lust, and a Christian might just tell themselves, well, this isn't porn. And so then it's okay. Like they think it's okay. So they they um come up with excuses or justifications as to why they can keep doing this, but they are really giving in to sin pretty freely the whole time. I think that would be one example. Um do you have any others that you wanted to add?

SPEAKER_01 40:18

Yeah, I and kind of tying further to this uh the sexual immorality one. I I mentioned it in the intro uh on the phone, the darkness of night. I really encourage uh married couples go to the go to bed at the same time. Uh that's when the devil is going to attack, that's when the sinful nature is going to seize the opportunity when you are by yourself, when you are alone at night. So I think uh it can be an opportunity for someone to hide their sins if they stay up past their significant other to a significant amount of time. Or if they go and they they spend time in a different room with their screen. I I would encourage people to uh to watch out for those things. And part of it is to watch each other so you can help keep each other accountable. Hey, why are you always going off to use your computer in a different room? Uh maybe it's work, maybe there's there's legitimately no problem at all. But if it's always you're always away from me while you're using these devices, that could be an issue.

SPEAKER_00 41:29

Why are you always standing up hours past when I did and and I think again there's that that um temptation for someone to to only put it on the extremes of like, well, I'm not going on to Tinder, I'm not going on to a pornography website, I'm just looking at social media. But again, these like the sexual immorality is is so packed into these things. And so again, like, well, maybe they're just doom scrolling, but what is it, what's going on with the doom scrolling? And and so I think those examples are are are very legitimate and real uh struggles that many Christians have. Um, I think again, we don't want this just to be about sexual immorality either. I think that there are other sins that people can very easily keep secret. Um they're arrogance. Um they they frame it in um humility, false humility. Like uh I remember um interactions with people where someone would even like say they're like so bad at things because they're really fishing for compliments. And so they um secretly hold to this arrogance, but then they justify it by it's like actually I'm humble. And it's just this like false humility of like um refusing to take a compliment and speaking poorly of themselves because they actually want people to say nice things about them. And so there's this arrogance that I can think I think can often overrun a Christian, and and then they they frame it in a in another positive way. It's like, well, this is this is the right way to do it. It's not that I think that I'm right, it's that this is the correct way, and it's good for my neighbor, it's good for the people I'm working with if they do it my way, because my way is the right way, and they don't realize that this is actually just sinful pride, sinful arrogance. Or I talked about it before, like withholding a grudge or withholding forgiveness or holding a grudge. Like I it's very easy to um justify it. That person is a jerk, that person has wronged me time and time again. Um, they're they're a narcissist, everyone's favorite word. And so then it's like, well, they're the problem, and I'm just protecting myself. So framing it in a way, but the reality is you're just sinfully withholding forgiveness. Um, first John one said, if you hate your brother and sister, you don't walk in The light is that what's really going on beyond these things? So I think our secret sins can often just be in the way that we present things or justify them in our own minds.

SPEAKER_01 44:09

Yeah, and we can uh even use kind of like armchair psychology and mental health rigging of the toxic people. Yeah. And I think that's something you are unforgiving, you are unloving to another person, and then you can couch it in the terms of actually they're the problem, and I'm just caring for myself. I need to fill up my glass before I pour it out to other people. And then you have tried to conceal your sins uh by passing off the blame to others.

SPEAKER_00 44:45

So here's why secret sin is such a big deal. Um I well, actually, before you do that, I I'll share this thought. Ask the average Lutheran um, are all sins equal? And they'll say, of course. True. We do need to understand it in its proper sense. Um all sins are equal in that they are damning um in the presence of God. Quorum Deo. Like uh they they are an affront against our holy God, they are idolatry at their heart, um, all sins are equal. Whether you are um if you commit lust, you're an adulterer, if you commit if you call your brother Raqqa, you're a murderer. Like all sins are equal in the presence of God. We talked though those Leviticus thoughts, there's just things you can't even avoid that make you unclean. So very very true. Not saying it's not true. But there are also some sins that are more damaging to others, and there are some sins that are more damaging to ourselves. Um, so sin some sins are more damaging to others. So like I um I call my brother Raka. Like that does not hurt him in the same way that killing him does. So like some sins are more damaging in their their effects and their consequences. Uh so you you look look at a woman with lust in your heart, like uh that that's not gonna lead to a divorce the same way like you have an affair, like there are some sins have consequences. Now, like maybe like okay, they're continuing the lust over pornography, longer conversation. Um, but like they like they have the glancing lust. Like that's not that in its consequences is not the same as having an affair. So like there are differences in sins in how it affects others. There's also, I think, differences in sins and how they can affect us. And I think secret sins can actually be worse than sins that get caught. Because the secret sin you continue to just live with, you continue to ignore or self-justify. But when it finally is brought to light, that's when you're forced to confess. And it goes back to the story of David and Bathsheba, when uh God sends the prophet Nathan to him to preach to him to bring his sin to light. It is actually a blessing when these sins are brought to light. And so secret sins are something that um you can continue to live with, and that's where the guilt heaps up, and Satan sneaks in and tries to get you to doubt your forgiveness and salvation and move you to unbelief. And so secret sins are actually incredibly dangerous in a way that like you get mad and whatever, like I can't think of a great example. You get mad and yell at your significant other, well, you did that to that person, um, that's going to be addressed right away, hopefully.

SPEAKER_01 47:48

Yeah, I I think I this is something I've I've talked about in my catechism classes and in adult instruction, the danger of secret sins, because the day the secret sins are are concealed and then they're not confessed, and and then other people don't know about them, and they can't uh point out your sin and uh hopefully help lead you to see the truth of God's word. It makes me think of Psalm 32. So I'm gonna jump down to verse three in this Psalm where it says, When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long, for day and night your hand was heavy on me, my strength was sapped, as in the heat of summer. So he's just bearing this weight of sin. Uh a lot of times people do connect this to David and him concealing his sin with Bathsheba and just saying how weighing that can be, and how destructive hiding your sins uh can be. And this is why we need to confess our sins, not to conceal our sins. So jumping on to some other aspects of this, David Well, yeah, David writes here, then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, I will confess my transgressions to the Lord, and you forgave the guilt of my sin. So part of the foolishness of trying to hide your sins is sure you you might be able to hide it from the Lord from your spouse, you might be able to hide it from your community, but you can't hide it from the Lord. Uh and there's actually joy in knowing that the Lord knows of your sins because there's the Lord who forgives your sins. Blessed is the one whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered. Blessed is the one whose sin the Lord does not count against them, and in whose spirit is no deceit. So David talks about how he tried to cover up his own sins. That didn't work, that led to uh destruction. But the Lord is the one who covers up sins. The Lord is the one he covers it with Jesus' blood and righteousness. So to confess rather than conceal sins is the blessed position to be in.

SPEAKER_00 50:18

One of the points I've really been trying to emphasize recently is that the law is good. The law is eternal and the law is good, and we delight in the law of the Lord. And I understand that the word Torah in Hebrew is not limited just to like specific like condemnations or the thus saith the Lord, do this, but it does include that. And the law is good. And so one of the things I talk about the Ten Commandments often is God is not just arbitrarily giving us laws for us to follow because he wants to tell us what to do. Like this flows from his very nature, his will, his eternal will, who he is. But also these things are a blessing for us. It is good to live according to God's law, it makes your life better. You think fourth commandment thoughts, uh, if you honor your own father and mother, it is a it's a blessing for you. That that commandment with a promise. And so God tells us um to struggle with secret sins and not confess our sins. Like that is not the good life. That's a struggle that you will not enjoy. And I think of times in my own life where the you're struggling with a a sin that something you did, and and and you just you can't sleep. Your bones waste away. But it is a good thing to live in the confidence of the forgiveness of sins. Because when you confess your sins, that's when you can hear the sure um words of your salvation and forgiveness to our Lord Jesus Christ. That's where we have that promise and and that the beautiful assurance of the keys and confession. And um this is one of the things I was talking about recently in Bible class. Um, in our hymnal, we have two different options for um uh like proclaiming forgiveness. There's one that's like a more like um what I would say like a pure absolution versus one that's more like a reminder of forgiveness. And uh I I always choose the I forgive you all your sins, name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Uh because I think there's really value in that of of hearing that word. Like you you are being forgiven. Um Christ says if if we confess our sins um we we have that power um to forgive. He has given the keys to to his church, to to believers, uh to proclaim the forgiveness of sins. And when that is proclaimed, it is as sure and certain as Christ Himself saying these words to to you. And I was talking a little bit about there's this historic debate within Lutheranism about how many sacraments there are, whether there's two or three. And so the two obvious ones that most people would probably think of are the Lord's Supper and baptism. Uh the third one that doesn't get talked about as much, but our confessions do say, um, speak of it as a sacrament, would be absolution, that that proclamation of the forgiveness of sins. And I said, the debate is not whether this is powerful or not. The debate is whether it's a sacrament in the terms of what we think of as a sacrament.

SPEAKER_01 53:31

Yeah, if there's an earthly element, it's really not a question.

SPEAKER_00 53:34

And so, like this is the imparting of the forgiveness of sins in that sacramental sense. Um, and and so again, you're delivering the forgiveness of sins through those those words. And and so that is that is truly powerful. And so this is where um I really do appreciate um and why I choose every single time to do that, I forgive you all your sins in the name of the Father and the Son, to communicate this idea that the forgiveness of sins is being delivered to you in this moment from Christ through through his called servant, and and and how beautiful that is. But then to understand that this isn't limited to the worship service. Actually, like if you're talking like liturgical purists, this is an in like in this was introduced into this. This is an innovation. This is an innovation, a good innovation. So we we can't be like no innovation ever. That's a good innovation. There's other good innovations. Um so this is an innovation, but the Christians um have been given the keys to forgive. Um, and and so we have that wonderful opportunity. Um, and so when you confess your sins and and you're not hiding it, that's me with the opportunity to receive the forgiveness of sins from your fellow, fellow believer. And might I give this encouragement to bring your sins to a pastor? Um, our Lutheran confessions commend private confession and absolution. Again, not that enumeration of sins, but it is actually truly valuable for a for you to hear your pastor speak these words. He has been called by Christ to speak these words to you. And um yeah, I I just I I wish that's something that people would take advantage of more. I wish it's something that um was truly retained in Lutheranism, like our confessions say it is, even though unfortunately I don't think it always is, because it is so valuable to be able to have that forgiveness proclaimed to you from that person who is uh a called and ordained servant of our Lord.

SPEAKER_01 55:43

Yeah, and I think the beauty of having that pastor to talk to to confess your sins is that uh you can confess your sins to one another and the forgiveness is real. James 5, 16 encourages confess your sins to one another and pray for each other. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. Have confidence that Christ has given these keys to his church and your fellow believers are are part of that church. But then that structure of going to this pastor who, for the sake of good order, administers the keys publicly to say, I can I can go to him and I can share these sins. And as we tie tie it to secret sin, uh one of the things about secret sin is revealing that secret sin doesn't mean you have to reveal it to everyone, right? Not the uh not the entire world needs to know about that, but you can share it with your pastor and you can talk to him and say, Pastor, this is what I am struggling with. And he's not gonna just give you the ten steps on how to be be a better person now, but he will proclaim to you your sins are forgiven. Uh I, as they call it an ordained servant of Christ, and by his authority, forgive you all your sins in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Uh go in peace. You are at peace with God. So what a wonderful thing to receive.

SPEAKER_00 57:14

And one of the things just thinking about that, it reminded me, um, one of I I wish I I was told this more in training, that a lot of times when Christians are looking for pastoral counseling, it's actually just they want confession and absolution, they just don't have the terms to ask for that. They don't or they don't realize that what that's what they're asking for.

SPEAKER_01 57:37

Or it's even an option.

SPEAKER_00 57:38

Yeah. And and so they're they're talking about it and and you're listening to their um their problems, and it's they're confessing a sin to you. And then instead of giving like self-help guidance for um how to be a better handler of our mental health struggles, which there's value to that stuff, you have the opportunity to proclaim the forgiveness of sins. And so it's not a one against the other, both and um there are there is good advice that I I think is valuable to share with people, but I think often we miss out on this idea that they're confessing their sins and you can proclaim the forgiveness of sins to them. You can deliver Christ's love to them.

SPEAKER_01 58:19

Yeah, you're sitting down with someone and talking to them, and they're they're sharing with you the struggles in their in their marriage relationship. And then you as the pastor could be so bold as to say, Well, it sounds like what you are sharing with me is a sinful thing that you are doing. Do you recognize that this is a sin that you have committed before God and your neighbor? And then walk them through those questions, and then upon their confession, proclaim to them there is forgiveness in Christ Jesus. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 58:52

And so we we approach this with that confidence of 1 John chapter 1. Um, it says that uh verses 8 through 10 talks about like if we uh believe worth and we f we deceive ourselves the truth is not in us, but also says if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. And so we have that assurance from God of the forgiveness of sins. And so we can go directly to God in prayer, confess our sins. But we're talking about the value here as well of taking it to a fellow Christian, specifically to a pastor, but then also um your your friend, your brother in Christ. And maybe with just a little bit of time left, we could talk about the value of having Christian community, having someone you can you can talk to about your walk of faith.

SPEAKER_01 59:40

Yeah. So the big danger of secret sin is that no one can point it out and say that it is sinful, you have sinned before God and you have sinned against your neighbor and tell you uh how how big of a deal this is, and then proclaim the forgiveness of sins to you. But the blessing of uh revealing what has been hidden is now you have a community of believers who can walk alongside you and help you out. Uh, I encourage people who have that temptation, going back to what I talked about in the beginning, the temptation to use their technology, their screen to as devices to draw them into sexual immorality is say, this is why it's such a blessing for you to talk with other people. Maybe it's your spouse and you just you encourage your spouse, help keep me accountable. Uh, right? Talk to me. Hey, you haven't been going to bed at the same time as me. You've been going off into another room just to sit on your computer. Like, what's going on? Have those conversations. Uh or maybe it's a fellow brother or sister who can have very candid conversations with you and just ask you on a regular basis. So, well, what have you been doing on your phone this week? Like you can formalize it. You could make a meeting on a weekly basis with another believer, and that person uh could ask you, What are you doing on your phone? Are you still doing this sin that you were once keeping in secret?

SPEAKER_00 1:01:24

Yeah, and and maybe it's that um like that they notice the proclivity to arrogance and ask, like, hey, how are you doing with your your struggle? You see it's a problem, how are you doing with that? Or maybe it's something like drinking alcohol, um, and they're they're having too much to drink, and they're they ask, like, how are you how are you doing? Having that open conversation, because uh there's value in having someone you're accountable to, having someone you're talking to. You talked about the phone. One of the things too is like I I remember seeing these things online where it's talking about or it's like videos of like a spouse checking their significant other's phone or uh and people being uncomfortable with that, and like some of them are just jokes. It was like I don't want him to see my phone because then it's like the calculator app and it's like eight plus seven, and like it's embarrassing that she needs a calculator to to do that. Um but if someone's spouse doesn't know their significant other's code for their phone, like I would wonder why not. Like I my my wife and I know each other's passcodes, there's no secret about that. Like um not that now there like there's like a risk respect, like hey, I I a lot of pastoral ministry is done on the phone, and so like um she doesn't just grab my phone and look through my text messages, but also like there's sometimes just she needs something from my phone, like passwords, we share accounts, different things, and like she can go get it, and it's like well why why is there that level of secrecy? Um what are you hiding from your spouse?

SPEAKER_01 1:03:05

Yeah, and that's something my wife and I have is a a lot of openness with our our phones. Um there's been times sharing location of these things. There there have been times where I have been driving, received a text message, and then I've just asked her, please respond to that for me. This is what I would like it to say. Uh and obviously, again, there needs to be some caution when someone sends you a text message directly, they're intending that to go to you and not be communication to your spouse as well. But to have that openness and to say, no, my wife can go into my phone, uh that that just helps you overall um to have that openness to avoid temptation.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:53

Yeah, and and so now finally I just want to wrap up with this thought about the assurance of our our salvation. Again, if we confess our sins, um he forgives us our sins, and it's not a tit for tat, um, but but we have this continued assurance of the forgiveness of sins. Christ covered us um with with with his shed blood on the cross. We we are baptized, we have this assurance of our salvation, and so we live in this confidence. And as those who um have been made new, have been raised to life with Christ, we are now dead to sin. So we flee from this sin again, not to save ourselves, but to say thank you and to live as who we truly are, um, the beloved of our Lord, uh, who have that sure hope of salvation.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:42

Yeah. And as we're talking through this right now, I'm I'm actually thinking about the uh questions for uh personal self-examination before receiving the Lord's Supper, because I've been teaching it in catechism class, and I'm thinking, you know, we're kind of halfway through that right now. Uh have I sinned against God and my neighbor? Am I sorry that I've sinned against God and my neighbor? Do I recognize that Jesus is the one who gives me forgiveness? And we can continue through those questions. Like, do I recognize that Jesus gives me forgiveness in this meal? That he gives me his true body and blood. And that's where I would direct someone who is listening to this and say, You want to go receive forgiveness, also go to the altar. Uh, go receive Jesus uh true body and blood for the forgiveness of your sins given to you in that meal. Uh most uh Lutheran churches are gonna offer that at least twice a month. Uh so and there's also an instance where maybe you are you feel so burdened uh and that you need to just call your pastor, and uh the your pastor very likely w would not say no, just wait a few weeks. Uh, he would be willing to bring you. the Lord's Supper and give you that tangible forgiveness from Jesus as well.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:05

Definitely.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:06

So what whatever is done in secret is revealed in the light. Our God is light. And for us that is a wonderful assurance to know that we live in the light of the Lord who gives us forgiveness and now moves us to live this life of openness and transparency where we can confess our sins to other and encourage one another to live in that light of the Lord. Thank you for joining us today.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:35

God bless