2 Guys 1 Jar

New episode of the Just Clownin’ Podcast is live.

It’s Sean and his best friend Ray talking about everything from Tarantino to some very questionable world records (yeah… involving mason jars), plus Crimson Desert, Lord of the Rings, and Magic School Bus.

Sean continues to butcher names like it’s a sport, and Ray might be a terrible father—but hey, he’s trying.

We also officially discovered a new term for “dead air.” It’s ours now. You can’t have it.

So kick back, grab a beer, possibly spark a joint if you're cool like that, and enjoy! Or not… up to you.

It’s all over the place… but honestly, that’s the point.

Transcript

SPEAKER_03 0:09

I'm bringing home my baby Bumblebee. Alright.

SPEAKER_02 0:15

Be so proud of me.

SPEAKER_01 0:16

Welcome back to the Just Clown Podcast. I'm Sean and I'm here with Ray.

SPEAKER_03 0:22

Ray. Hey, didn't use my government that time. Good job.

SPEAKER_01 0:27

Yeah, I refrained from using your government name that time because I know you don't like being called Raymond.

SPEAKER_03 0:33

Jesus Christ, dude. What are you, my mad father? Who's not around, by the way? I should have said my mad mother. My dad don't call me at all. Let alone my real full name. Alright, move on.

SPEAKER_02 0:46

Alright, fine. Taking shots. He doesn't call you by your real name. Doesn't call me at all.

SPEAKER_03 0:52

He doesn't call my number.

SPEAKER_02 0:54

Cocksucker? Does he have your number? Why wouldn't he?

SPEAKER_03 0:57

He's my father. He's not my fucking strange uncle that touched my balls. He's my daddy.

SPEAKER_01 1:03

Well, at least he's got your number.

SPEAKER_03 1:06

Yeah, I mean, trying to call him it, pussy. I can hear the echo on the headphones, that's fun.

SPEAKER_01 1:14

You can hear the echo on the headphones? I can, yeah, when I talk loud enough. You don't like it?

SPEAKER_03 1:19

I don't give a fuck.

SPEAKER_01 1:20

As long as it's not picking up. It won't pick up, no, because that's why this is coming through the headphones here. So I want to talk to you about something. Like, so I just discovered.

SPEAKER_03 1:30

Hey, the perfect perfect place to do it, buddy.

SPEAKER_01 1:32

Perfect place to do it. So, you know I love Tarantino, right? Who's that again? Quentin Tarantino.

SPEAKER_03 1:38

Quentin Tarantino. Name rings a bell. Um is he the guy who did Goodfellas? No, that's Scorsese. Scorsese. Um, okay, wait. Quentin Tarantino, he did, he did fucking Oppenheimer!

SPEAKER_02 1:53

Fuck yeah, dude. I loved Oppenheimer.

SPEAKER_01 1:56

Alright, so I discovered the other day that Roger Avery, Quentin Tarantino's like best friend, they like Yeah, he was on Rogan with him, right? Yeah, but and also they have their own podcast together as well.

SPEAKER_03 2:07

Damn, that podcast is probably so fucking annoying.

SPEAKER_01 2:10

It might, it might be pretty annoying. I don't know if it's gonna be Quentin.

SPEAKER_03 2:13

Quentin Tarantino just pumped out just talking about movies. Sorry, I don't mean to cut you again, but have you ever heard uh Uma Thurman talk about she was like watching a movie in Quentin's private movie theater with Quentin Tarantino and like I forget who else it was. Some of us Paul Thomas Anderson. Paul Thomas Anderson, and she was like, they're both so yaked out they wouldn't shut the fuck up and they kept pausing the movie every five minutes.

SPEAKER_01 2:32

Apparently, it was like if you want to experience like the depth of like coke addiction, how far you can go, you gotta sit in the same room with Tarantino and Paul Thomas Anderson.

SPEAKER_03 2:41

That shit that shit's so funny.

SPEAKER_01 2:42

Okay, sorry, continue. It is pretty fucking funny. Um, what the fuck was this saying again? Well, yeah, so Roger Avery and Tarantino, they worked together at this like movie video rental place, right? And it was like during this time period where they wrote a lot of screenplays with each other. So Roger Avery wrote this story for like um Um Butch, essentially. It was supposed to be like its own screenplay, and Tarantino used that as his own story in Paul in Pulp Fiction. That's why at the beginning it says stories by uh Roger Avery and Quentin Tarantino. And now I fucking Oh my god. Jesus crazy room is falling apart, dude.

SPEAKER_03 3:30

This Ligger Kingdom is coming crashing down.

SPEAKER_01 3:33

Fucking my my CD case. I'll I'll take care of it later. I'll fucking whatever. Uh for the audience, my CD literally just fell off my desk and I was literally just tapping on my desk. That was God doing that, dude. Okay, that was divine intervention and talking about pulp fiction.

SPEAKER_02 3:49

He said, haven't you talked about this enough? That's what God was saying. He said, Enough with the pulp fiction, Sean. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 3:57

Fucking so I also found all this that Roger Avery initially, he was the one that worked on it was his idea, his concept for true romance and natural born killers. He wrote like this like 50-page screenplay, and then he gave the screenplay to Tarantino, and Tarantino took it and he wrote like a fucking 500-page manuscript. And apparently natural born killers. So like fucking uh True Romance and Natural Born Killers are the same story. They're like the same fucking people, essentially. And when uh Tarantino sold the screenplay for True Romance, um Tony Scott reached out to Roger Avery and got Roger Avery to like refine the screenplay. And so that's why it says special thanks to Roger Avery. I just think it's neat that Roger Avery, like at the beginning of Tarantino's career, was like a major influence on the stories that made Tarantino. Yeah, but that's what I was thinking about.

SPEAKER_03 4:58

And like Roger Avery's like not anywhere near famous, and Quinn Tarantino is like considered one of the greatest directors of all time. And like I guess he did direct the movies, but like if Roger Avery wrote a good portion of them, that's half of the movie is writing it. Yeah, and true. Hold on, hold on. And that's also why people love Tarantino movies, is because of the writing. It's mostly the writing. I mean, his directing is great, but it is generally the writing. That snappy dialogue. Everybody loves the dialogue and the writing in those movies. So like I think not him not being as well known. I guess maybe because it's just his first couple movies, and then Tarantino did the rest himself. But I guarantee Roger Avery was still helping his homeboy out.

unknown 5:33

Has to be.

SPEAKER_03 5:33

They're best friends.

SPEAKER_01 5:34

Well, yeah, they're bet they have their own podcast. But like it's it's crazy how like the foundations of the Tarantino verse essentially started with Roger Avery's ideas.

SPEAKER_03 5:44

Yeah, yeah. So like Quentin Tarantino would probably be still working at that video store if Roger Avery didn't help him out. Basically, he would be a nobody. Yeah, but uh yeah, I mean, maybe he's gotta give his boy more props. Maybe he does, and I'm just not that big of a fan, but it seems like Quentin Tarantino's been on the high all on his own. At least he took him on Rogan, I guess. What does Roger Avery do? Is he a director as well? Or is he just hang- is he just Quentin's buddy? He's just Quentin's buddy.

SPEAKER_01 6:08

They're college buddies that like worked at a video rental place together.

SPEAKER_03 6:13

It's like Mr. Beast when he like hires his like little league baseball team to run his like events. Yeah. Swear to god, dude, Mr. Beast just got him a complete change of topic. Mr. Beast just can't put out like this big ass video, and like it came it came out that like because like the the the games they did in it were so dog shit. Like Mr. Beast is like a billionaire, he's got like the one of the biggest YouTube channels in the world, and then they did this thing, it was like a hundred streamers in a room, last one to get eliminated gets a million dollars or whatever. And uh for one of the games, it was like it's Mr. Beast, he's got like so much money he could do anything. One of the games was like kick a soccer ball and score on this player, and it was like, What? That sounds pretty fucking easy. Well, I mean the play the the goalie was speed, if you know anything about streamers. Speed, I show speed is like a he's a very he's one of the biggest the biggest streamer in the world, debatably, and he's like a avid soccer player and athletic guy. So he's like he's really good.

SPEAKER_01 7:06

I I know speed.

SPEAKER_03 7:07

Yeah, so like even in the video, only two people scored on him and everybody else got eliminated because he's so good at soccer. So it was like, I don't know, it was just watching the video. You're like, wait, this is all you guys could come up with for game design with this fucking bullshit is oh, score a soccer goal. It's like, ah man, it's crazy how like some people have so much money and still so little ideas. Like, man, you guys must be a bunch of bumbling fucking monkeys, and I don't mean that in a racist way.

SPEAKER_01 7:32

We could we could literally go all back right now with a soccer ball if I even fucking owned one, and we could like shoot on each other and like boom.

SPEAKER_03 7:40

Your unathletic ass doesn't own any sports equipment. No, I just let me hold on, let me look around this room for sports equipment. Nope, nothing. He took the frickin' thing off the door though. He took the and that see that's me right there. I just said frickin' because I have a son now and I can't swear around him, so I'm trying to conceal myself. I'm on a podcast. He took the fucking thing off the door that said live, laugh, love, suck my balls or whatever, put it under his pillow.

SPEAKER_02 8:03

I just checked it's under his pillow. I actually I fucking I put it in my parents' room. I was like, I'm fucking. Damn, you put a microphone in it?

SPEAKER_03 8:09

You put a microphone in it? Okay, you know what I'm talking about for future content. Yeah, I mean, well, or just listen to them bang. I told Sean if we hear them banging, we're putting the mics up to the wall, dude.

SPEAKER_01 8:20

Also, if anybody ever calls in the middle of our podcast, they are officially on the podcast.

SPEAKER_03 8:25

Yeah, so put out our numbers right now. Sean's number is 204.

SPEAKER_01 8:32

Hit us with a hotline, bro. Well good. So, like, if any of our friends listening to this podcast, if you call me in the middle of recording, you are on the podcast. Yeah, but nobody calls you. Nobody fucking calls me.

SPEAKER_03 8:44

Nobody calls me either, bruh. Like, I I look at my phone because it rings and I'm like, oh, it's just Sean again.

SPEAKER_04 8:52

Oh, it's Ditto. Oh, Ditto.

SPEAKER_03 8:54

Oh, it's Sean or Erica. Big surprise.

SPEAKER_02 8:58

Big fucking surprise.

SPEAKER_01 8:59

Sometimes I get notifications and I'm like, who the fuck's talking to me? And it's really just like breaking news.

SPEAKER_03 9:04

I'm like, oh my god. I was just gonna say, Sean's like, oh my god, I got a text message. He opened looks at his phone. Skip the dishes of the new offer. Exactly. Yes, order one, get one for free.

SPEAKER_01 9:17

This reminds me of a fucking fat, fucking depressed PC. Yeah, you fucking chud. Nobody texting me. Zero bitches. Fucking fucking DoorDash is like, hey, we missed you. Yeah, dude.

SPEAKER_03 9:29

Oh, I get that all the time, and I'm like, oh, no way, someone's messaging me. And then I look at my phone, I'm like, you fucking loser. You really think someone's gonna call you? You fucking fat chud?

SPEAKER_01 9:39

Fucking, I can't believe how dry my phone is. Like, it's like the driest.

SPEAKER_02 9:45

I thought that was a completely different direction. What did you think I was gonna say?

SPEAKER_03 9:51

Can't believe how dry my fucking, I don't know, my feet are something my toes.

SPEAKER_02 9:55

I'm like, what's how dry my sex life is?

SPEAKER_03 9:58

Oh, damn, dude. I'll fucking break your back right now, dude. I'll bend you over that bed.

SPEAKER_02 10:03

Alright, guys, you heard it here on the pod, and you're gonna hear it on the pod. Yeah, let's just put these mics down and start fucking having gay sex.

SPEAKER_01 10:09

That's literally just like the entire episode is just fucking.

SPEAKER_03 10:12

We should get a video camera and we could frickin' record it and put it out.

SPEAKER_01 10:16

I do eventually want to get webcams in here. Yeah, no shit. Not not not for gay sex, but I fucking.

SPEAKER_03 10:21

Wait, why are we getting cameras on?

SPEAKER_01 10:23

It's a fucking like video. Yeah, the video of the gay sex we're gonna have on camera.

SPEAKER_03 10:28

For the pod. I never had gay sex with a friend. Usually just dudes in KFC bathrooms, but it's not gay if you leave your socks on.

SPEAKER_01 10:40

That's an old one.

SPEAKER_03 10:41

I've never heard of that before, but I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna use it. I'm gonna keep all my clothes on. I'm just gonna pull my little peanut. Pull my little schmeck out, dude.

SPEAKER_01 10:48

Fucking yo, can you pass me my weed pin behind you? The Sauron figure?

SPEAKER_03 10:54

Or which one is it again? It's right there. Oh, it's the little ent guy. Oh, maybe it's the predator. My bad. Oh, the one that looks like a weed. Oh, never mind. I didn't see the dragon cup back there, dude. You hide that one behind the TV well. You said this one's gotta be hidden. That's my fucking chalice. It's your cum chalice, dude. You fill that shit up with fucking seed. Take a little swig when you're thirsty. I got that for my 30th. How much cum do you think you could save up before it would start getting coagulated? Oh my gosh. You think you get like a two-liter bottle of it? It's gotta like harden, right?

SPEAKER_02 11:28

Like a two-liter milk jug?

SPEAKER_03 11:31

Two-liter milk jug, yeah, or like a pot bottle or something. Like a pot bottle. Do you think like you think it would like coagulate, or do you think like it would stay viscous if you kept it in the keep in the fridge, maybe?

SPEAKER_01 11:41

Okay, well, I think you gotta keep it in the fridge, yeah, because there's sperm brain. You got a sperm brain, dude. I was gonna say I was gonna say sperm brain. I was like, there are sperm brains. No, no, there's a spirit sperm bank.

SPEAKER_03 11:55

Just fucking cum on my low.

SPEAKER_01 11:56

They keep that shit refrigerated so it like stays like you know alive.

SPEAKER_03 12:00

Damn, we should do an experiment. We should do a one-week cum challenge and see who can save up, see who can get the most cum in a bucket.

SPEAKER_01 12:06

Well, we're gonna keep it in the fridge.

SPEAKER_03 12:08

Obviously, next to the milk, dude. Your mom's making coffee in the morning, dude.

SPEAKER_01 12:14

Oh, the mighty big thing a mayonnaise.

SPEAKER_03 12:16

Damn, why is this fucking milk so salty?

SPEAKER_01 12:19

Look at this milk tastes sour.

SPEAKER_03 12:21

Oh, never mind. Never mind. You know what? Fuck it, I'm gonna do it. Your mom's like, your mom's like, damn, this fucking tastes good.

SPEAKER_02 12:30

Fuck, this is good coffee. Fucking this coffee fucking slam, I love this coffee right now. Oh, dude, that fucking that's kind of fucking disgusting. Oh, this is good. Oh my god, I'm so energetic. I feel like I could have another kid.

SPEAKER_01 12:47

I actually fucking I gotta Google this, man. I wonder if there's like ever been anyone that fucking did that. There has to be.

SPEAKER_03 12:53

There has to be gooners keeping fucking buckets of cum.

SPEAKER_01 12:57

Anyone? Let's find out. I don't know if you should search that. I'm gonna fucking kept their cum in a jar. Fucking Google knows everything.

SPEAKER_03 13:07

They're just gonna hit you with the AI, the Google AI being like, yes, of course, I keep my cum in a jar right now. It's like you're a robot, dude. Fuck it.

SPEAKER_01 13:18

Oh, dude. We're gonna go down the rabbit hole right now. We're gonna go down the rabble hole.

SPEAKER_03 13:23

So we can start fucking. Yes!

SPEAKER_01 13:26

Dude, so there are documented, albeit anecdotal instances of individuals keeping semen in jars, often discussed in online forums and discussions.

SPEAKER_03 13:39

Hell yeah, dude. You know who's the head of those online forums and discussions? This guy. I kind of I kind of walked you into a trap right there. I fucking I led you like a fucking lamb to slaughter. I said, I said, how do you think does anybody keep cum in a jar? Knowing full well that I got a jar full of cum at home. Oh my god, dude.

SPEAKER_01 13:57

Okay, important safety and health considerations.

SPEAKER_02 14:01

Bacteria and mold.

SPEAKER_01 14:04

Yeah, my cum's got mold on it, but who doesn't, dude? So if we're gonna fucking try and like, you know, keep our cum in jars, we gotta like, you know, keep this in mind. There's also odor and biohazard risks involved keeping your cum in jars.

SPEAKER_03 14:18

I usually use like uh what do they call it? Like a mason jar, get a good seal on it. Oh, maybe. Yeah, it does a jar with a good seal. I don't keep that shit fresh, bro. That's like it's like pickles, bro. That shit will last forever. Okay, well, listen to this.

SPEAKER_01 14:32

Like, apparently, like storing bodily fluids in open non-stare sterile containers, like a household jar, at room temperature will lead to rapid bacterial and mold growth. So, yeah, you are you do need it needs to be sealed. So fuck it. In the fridge.

SPEAKER_03 14:46

In the fridge, keep it in the fridge. Literally, I'm saying put it next to the milk, see what happens. I mean, people who just are have a steady supply of cum, dude. They're like, I'm gonna come again soon. I better not close this jar. I'm gonna fucking bust one out in about three seconds. I gotta keep this thing open.

unknown 15:04

Fuck.

SPEAKER_01 15:05

And the odor, we all know this. Like, apparently, like stored fucking jizz can develop a strong, unpleasant smell over time. You ever see on a T, dude?

SPEAKER_02 15:16

What? You ever see on a T? Oh, ever come on a titty? Come on a turd. Oh, come on a fucking titty.

SPEAKER_03 15:29

Finish shitting and then be like, God damn, the smell of shit's making me horny. I gotta bust on these turds.

SPEAKER_01 15:35

I've never I've never done that in fucking.

SPEAKER_03 15:38

I've done that seven times at least. I've busted on turds, dude. I'm not I'm not ashamed to say it. I've busted on a turd a couple times.

SPEAKER_01 15:44

I do usually jack off like uh over the fucking over the toilet, anyways, because it's easier to get rid of. So maybe I should over the toilet sick. Do you just aim it downwards? Aim it downwards and right you know, punked into the water. I was gonna say, yeah, it's a toilet, wash your hands, and you go you go about your day.

SPEAKER_03 15:58

I don't know why I'm asking if you aim it downwards. I've cumbed on turds seven times.

SPEAKER_01 16:00

So I just like I've never had a turd in there.

SPEAKER_03 16:03

So I usually do it, it's like I think of it as like less waste, you know. I'm only flushing once, so I get the turds, the pea, and the cum all down at once. Oh, dude. All the bodily fluids get flushed right up.

SPEAKER_02 16:12

Sometimes I spit in there too. I go spit on it. You're nasty. Get nice wet, dude.

SPEAKER_01 16:21

All right, and then biohazard risks. Stored fluids are generally considered a biohazard. That's all it says here.

SPEAKER_03 16:28

Yeah, I mean, I don't know if I'd ever store my shit, but I think I definitely think about get getting into store and cum, just like for a rainy day. Like in case like Erica's like, yo, I really want to have sex, and I'm like, all right, sounds good. I don't want to bang, so I just whip out the jar and I fucking go down or fake chow. I forget what movie that's from, but it's where you eat pussy. Is it hallpass? Is it hall pass? I thought all pass or are horrible bosses. I wasn't sure which one. Um but you yeah, you fake. Is it horrible bosses? Or is it all pass? I think it's all pass. I think you're right. I think it's all pass. And yeah, and then you go down and then you're eating the pussy, but you're just you're just making noises and using your fingers, and then I just dump a little bit of cum on her, and then she's like, wait, did you even put it inside of me? I'm like, dude, that come out of my mouth now. I didn't think about this joke until I finished it. It's fine.

SPEAKER_01 17:10

You should keep it in a turkey baster that way fucking you can get like the squirting out of it instead of just like pouring. It's like asked the illusion that it came out of you. You know, having it in a baster fucking press on that shit so it squirts, so it fucking.

SPEAKER_03 17:24

I'm that like step on step on it with my foot so it's like a projection, a projectile to come. And then it gets all over me, and I'm like, what the fuck? Fucking Christ.

SPEAKER_01 17:34

Let's find I want to find out here. Okay, like if there's like a world record of this shit, is there a world record? Let's find out.

SPEAKER_03 17:41

I don't think Guinness is coming out to check out your cum jar. I don't think Guinness is being like, yeah, yeah, yeah, we'll be down there on Saturday. Just make sure the jar is fresh.

SPEAKER_01 17:50

I want to see if it's viable to actually try and break this record. Is there a world record? There is no officially recognized world record for a cum jar.

SPEAKER_03 18:06

Um, yeah, I don't think I mean that brings up another question. I don't think there is like Guinness World Records for like sex stuff. Is there? Like, I mean, I know Bonnie Blue fucked like whatever 1,054 dudes in one day or whatever, and like she's like, that's the record, and it's like, who's checking? Yeah, who's checking? Nobody's checking that because it's insane. Also, Bonnie Blue looks beat, dude. She looks fucking fucking ugh.

SPEAKER_01 18:28

She looks cracked the fuck up.

SPEAKER_03 18:30

She looks beat up, bro. She looks beat up, she looks beat up and sad. She looks sad in the eyes.

SPEAKER_01 18:34

Her world record's like on this fucking porn site that I discovered. So you've seen the video? I didn't bother watching it.

SPEAKER_03 18:40

Why not? Pull it up right now. I've never seen the video.

SPEAKER_01 18:42

I'm not fucking pulling it up.

SPEAKER_03 18:43

Why not? I would love to see that video. At least skim through it.

SPEAKER_01 18:46

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 18:47

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 18:48

Are they all wearing ski masks?

SPEAKER_02 18:49

That's what I heard.

SPEAKER_01 18:50

I heard they were all wearing ski masks. They're they're they're not. It's like it's like a part of the fucking of the record.

SPEAKER_03 18:57

I might be thinking of another one because there's that other chick, Lily Phillips, who also did something like that. And I remember there was like, I don't know if this was true, but there was a story when she was doing it because guys were lined literally lined up outside of her apartment or wherever it was. I heard him. And dudes were like, there was like they were taking video of it because I think somebody was making a documentary, but people were so like didn't want their identities to be known. So they were legitimately wearing schemas. And I swear to god, I heard this. I don't know if this is true, but like some guy's mom found out he was in line and like came to the line and like pulled him out of line and was like, You're not doing this. How embarrassing is that gotta be you're like 23 years old and your mom's like, No, you're not gonna fuck this whore.

SPEAKER_01 19:34

How dare you! I thought you knew better than this. I raised you right. I raised you to be this way.

SPEAKER_02 19:40

Mom, you're a whore.

SPEAKER_01 19:41

It'd be fucking embarrassing. Imagine like her like fucking dragging him out by his ear.

SPEAKER_03 19:45

Yeah, like literally like a child. It's like, Jesus Christ, dude. You gotta move out of your mom's hoes. You gotta get your own place, brother.

SPEAKER_02 19:52

Good Christ. It's so crazy.

SPEAKER_01 19:56

That could that could be me one day if I stay here any longer.

SPEAKER_03 20:00

Yeah, well, if if there was a girl in the city being like, I'm banging a thousand dudes today, guarantee you're in line. Guarantee you're in line. You might you'll you'll be like, you'll you're like, I'll be number 999. I don't give a fuck. I'll be the last dude. I'm getting in there. Imagine being the last dude, bruh. Being the last dude. Everybody's talked about this on a comedy podcast, but being the last dude's gotta be rough. Gotta be rough.

SPEAKER_01 20:21

Well, fuck you. Let's backtrack here. Let's do a bullet. Let's just let's just insinuate that her pussy's like a cumjar. There would be mass, and I'm talking like mass. No, they all have to work on them. Biohazard risks. They all definitely have to work.

SPEAKER_03 20:35

Are you telling me she's not getting cream pieds? There's no way she's like, I'm gonna let a thousand dudes raw dog me. You're definitely getting AIDS and dying the next day if you do that.

SPEAKER_01 20:44

Probably. They fucking like, but then like fucking, like, why try like break a record if you're not getting at least a thousand cream pies? Thousand cream pies. Take it up, take it up or not.

SPEAKER_03 20:52

I think you should do that. I think you should do a thousand cream pies. I think this would be like the biggest thing to determine if you're gay or not, then. Because you know you're still not sure if you're by. You should be like, yo, I'm gonna take a thousand cream pies from dudes and then find out if I'm gay or not.

SPEAKER_01 21:05

And it was like, nah, I'm fucking straight, I'm fucking straight. Damn, after a thousand dudes, turns out I'm not gay.

SPEAKER_03 21:11

It turns out I was wrong about myself.

SPEAKER_02 21:14

Fucking sitting on one of those like fucking air cushions for the next six days. It's got your whole wreck, dude. At least I know now.

SPEAKER_03 21:24

At least now I know I'm gonna start farting into this mic when I gotta. Fucking dude, that's actually that could be a bit. Oh, that's what they do it on every podcast. Every comedy podcast. There's on uh your mom's host podcast. I don't know if you know which one that is. Tom Sigurd at Christina. Sigura and his wife. Yeah, Tom Sigir at Christina Pajitzki. Yeah, they had a designated fart mic where it was they wouldn't use the mic that they were using because they would fart in it, and then they would bring it back into their mouth, and they would be like, Oh, now this smells like fart. So they had a designated mic where they would be like, pass me the fart mic, and then they would put the fart mic in their ass and fart. That's fucking awesome. Like there's a there's a comedian Mark. Mark Norman who does he does he farts in mics a lot too.

SPEAKER_01 22:02

Mark Normand, yeah. I love I love Mark Normand. Mark Normand? Yeah. I think it's Mark Normand. Mark Normand. It's not Mark Normand. It's fucking Mark Normand, dude. It's not I mean like it's fucking it's spelt like Normand, but I'm pretty sure. Yeah, no, it's pronounced Norman. It's Mark Normand. Are you fucking serious? I'm a big fan of him, trust me. Fucking because like every time I watch fucking like Protect Our Parks, or they say Normand. Unless they're fucking just trolling him.

SPEAKER_03 22:30

They definitely know. It's Mark Norman. I mean, he was raised in like uh Louisiana, but like it's Mark Normand. It's Mark Norman. I see I see him live before he blew up.

SPEAKER_01 22:39

Well, fucking, well, it's like my last name is Bouvier, but it's like spelled like Bouvier. You know what I'm saying? Like a French twist on fucking name.

SPEAKER_03 22:46

I mean, maybe it is, but literally I've never I've never even heard him say his name like that. Like I'm a I'm a I don I know I don't know about you, but like you've you're like a Joe Rogan stan where like I'm like an avid comedy podcast listener. Mark Norman, Mark Norman, Mark Norman, we might be drunk, dude. With Sam Marrill. No, that's his podcast name.

SPEAKER_02 23:07

Oh shit. See what I mean? You you don't even know the guy. I know him, dude. We're friends.

SPEAKER_01 23:15

Fucking I'm gonna give us how you pronounce, I'm gonna fucking try and prove you are right now. How do you pronounce Mark Norman?

SPEAKER_03 23:22

Just literally pull up a name, his himself at any podcast where they introduce him. Mark Norman. Oh, it's Mark Normand. No, it's Mark Normand.

SPEAKER_02 23:30

Why are you doing these weird pronunciations? What are you doing?

SPEAKER_01 23:36

You're being weird. Well, can you ensave me another one if you have an extra one? I mean, if you fucking say please, I guess. Please.

SPEAKER_03 23:44

Gotta teach you like my son, bro.

SPEAKER_01 23:46

So like we told ourselves we were gonna do a sober pod. We are kind of sober now.

SPEAKER_03 23:50

I'm definitely sober.

SPEAKER_01 23:51

I've had one beer.

SPEAKER_03 23:52

Or our second one, yeah. And the second beer that I'm drinking is literally 2.5%. I don't know. Extra light beer, lemons, lemon shandy, but it's from a local brewery. We're gonna shout them out right now. Local brewery, uh, Trans Canada Brewing Company. Shout out, Winnipeg. Shout out. Um, yeah, I don't know. Erica was at the I don't know what Erica was doing. No, we're supposed to go to a comedy show on Saturday. Fucking your fucking wiggle. Everything's falling off this desk.

SPEAKER_01 24:19

Everything's falling. We need a studio.

SPEAKER_03 24:21

Your Wigger Kingdom is coming down. My Wiggler Kingdom is coming down. Oh fuck! I just dropped the weed. Um no, Erica was uh we were supposed to go to a comedy show on Saturday. And I don't know, I just didn't feel like going. So Erica went with uh, which is weird to me. Like I love going to comedy shows. Um maybe I was cranky or something. Maybe Erica was being a fucking bitch, but probably just me being cranky. But no, she went to the show and then she came back and there was like beers in the fridge, and I'm like, who bought beers? And she's like, I brought I brought the beers for you. I was like, Well, you're a good woman. Well, I can't be mad at you now. That's how I can keep her in. Can't be mad at you now. She said, I don't know, they look good. They were local. I thought you would like them. I said, Alright, I'll save them. Yeah, the first one was alright. It was that's the thing. The the the contrast between what Erica bought. So the first beer she bought me, the first one I drank, was a 6.8% IPA. Oh my god. An extra strong beer. The second one she bought me was a 2.5 extra light beer.

SPEAKER_01 25:20

So do you like your IPAs? Because I can never get into them, but I know there's like fucking people that like that are just like rage about IPAs.

SPEAKER_03 25:28

IPAs are delicious because like I like an IPA because it limits my drinking ability. Where like if I'm drinking a normal beer, I could chug that thing in two seconds. Where an IPA is like, you not you don't chug IPAs because they're so like hoppy.

SPEAKER_01 25:40

Hoppy fucking like bitter.

SPEAKER_03 25:41

Yeah, they're so bitter and hoppy. Like they're not they're they're like an acquired taste. I like uh I like a good sour beer. I don't know if you ever had like a sour beer. Sour beers are my favorite.

SPEAKER_01 25:50

I've tried. I'm more of a lager guy. I like lagers and I do like ales too, but like the ale needs to be like the same percentage as my lager. It needs to be like around like five percent. Otherwise, it just like doesn't fucking taste good.

SPEAKER_03 26:02

I wish I could tell you the difference that I knew the difference between a lager and an ale, but they both just sound like beer to me. You don't know the difference? Why would I? I'm not a raging alcoholic like you.

SPEAKER_01 26:12

I mean, I I I I don't quite understand the difference either. I think that's fucked up.

SPEAKER_03 26:16

You can't say, you can't do this to me and go, you can't do this. That's fucked up. Hold on, that's fucked up. You can't go, wait, you don't know the difference? And then me go no, and then you'd be like, yeah, me neither. I was I thought you would. It seemed like you were grandstanding from your goddamn high horse, and then you were like, nah, me neither.

SPEAKER_01 26:31

No, I fucking I'm just I'm just as fucking ignorant as fucking fucking. I have no idea. I imagine it's how they're brewed, but I'm pretty sure it has to do something with like the fucking like the grain that they're using.

SPEAKER_03 26:42

Oh, that makes sense, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 26:44

I'm pretty sure. I think like one's like made of like barley and the other one's like made of like fucking wheat. I'm pretty sure it's something to do with that. I'm gonna have to go, I'm gonna Google it again. Google is our friend today, guys. Google is our friend today. We don't have a Jamie on the pod. So it's literally just Sean and his fucking Google.

SPEAKER_03 27:04

We got a Jamie, dude. He's under the bed. Jamie, come out here. What are you doing, Jamie? Stop lying.

SPEAKER_01 27:10

Get out of here, buddy. Okay, I think I'm right though. I think I'm right. Oh, okay. So ale. Ale is made of like, you know, the yeast that they use is what the hell? It's top fermenting and bottom fermenting. It's still yeast, but like, I have no idea.

SPEAKER_03 27:26

This is I'm a fucking huge top fermenter, dude. Every time me and Erica are fermenting, I go on top. I fucking ferment the shit out of her top. It's the temperatures. That's fucking crazy, man. She's a power bottom though, dude. She fucking exhibits a lot of power. Yeah. Yeah, dude. You ever see those videos where the girl is like, the girl's got the guy laying on the bed and his legs are spread and she's thrusting on his dick? That's what Erica does to me, dude. She's she fucks me, dude. It's brutal. It's brutal.

SPEAKER_02 27:54

You got your like legs spread open.

SPEAKER_03 27:56

I got my legs spread open, my assholes dangling out. It's crazy. Sometimes she slips a little finger down there.

SPEAKER_02 28:01

I say, Stop! Stop! Don't do that. I'm doing it.

SPEAKER_03 28:04

I'm doing it.

SPEAKER_02 28:05

She said, I'm doing it. I said, stop. Baby, stop. Yeah, Eric fucks me. You don't find that. You don't find that emasculating. No? What do you mean? She's got a dick. She's fucking me in the ass, dude. I'm just kidding. How is it emasculating to get fucked by a dude?

SPEAKER_01 28:28

Yeah, it's fucking awful power, dude.

SPEAKER_03 28:31

Dude, Erica exhibits power over me, bro. No, Erica, Erica's definitely the man of the house, the breadwinner, everything. Erica makes so well, I don't have a job, so Erica obviously makes more money than me, but Erica makes so much more money than me. Erica hit me yesterday and she was like, here's some money, pussy. And I was like, Thank you, baby.

SPEAKER_02 28:48

Oh baby, thank you.

SPEAKER_01 28:50

I remember like you fucking told me this story when like um you literally gave like Erica like what was like 500 bucks every payday, or was it like 200 or some shit like that?

SPEAKER_03 28:58

Yeah, every time when I was still working at the warehouse, so every day that every every two weeks or every week, every every payday that wasn't a rent check, I would get paid, and then I would wake up and I would send Erica like a good chunk of money, and then I would pay all the bills or whatever, and then I'd be like, here you can just keep it. And then I would usually just be like, yo, give me some back. You know, give me yo yo, give me like two back, give me like 200 back.

SPEAKER_02 29:18

And then you fucking found out like how much money she was.

SPEAKER_01 29:21

Oh yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 29:22

Yeah, dude. Erica made Erica made like so last and who cares, who cares about if I'm putting this out on the air, who gives a fuck? Um, last year Erica made like she made like a significantly less amount of money, and she was also no, that wasn't Matt Leaf. She made a significantly less amount of money, and uh she got like crazy income tax, and then she got like five grand or something, or like six grand income tax. It's crazy. That's I think what we bought Kendrick tickets with. Oh, if I'm not mistaken, because yeah, she got a shitload, because what's this this is March or in April, right? And last year the Kendrick show was April 20th or something. It was this, it was in this month, so it was last year. She got like a giant income tax, and I was like, yo, what about those Kendrick tickets? And then she bought Kendrick tickets for me and my like my friend and his wife at the time, and she was like, Yeah, it was like I think it was like eleven hundred dollars or something. And then, and then I was like, Okay, uh, we bought the tickets. You can you send me the money, my friend? And he was like, Ah, sorry, don't got it. And Erica was like, What? They don't have it. I was like, I guess he'll pay me when he gets paid. And after that, she was like, Yeah, I'm probably not gonna do that again unless they have the money right away. I was like, eh, fair. Did they ever did they ever pay her back? Yeah, of course they're gonna be able to do that. Okay, well, thank god, dude. That would have been so fucking rude. Yeah, they pay us back, and then it was possibly one of the worst trips ever. Well, the concert was great, but my uh my friend's wife at the time was kind of a low-key bitch. Shout out Kyle Fox. I'm gonna take my uh sweater off here and just Kyle's or uh Sean's gonna run the show for a second.

SPEAKER_01 30:50

Fucking Raymond's stripping naked because for some reason, like, he wants me to fuck him.

SPEAKER_03 30:55

Sean just gets me so hot and bothered, dude.

SPEAKER_01 30:59

We can leave a little bit of dead air. It's fine.

SPEAKER_03 31:01

No, no, no dead air, no dead air, no dead air. You know, it's dead air, fucking uh uh uh corpse's ceef. Ooh, that's a good joke.

SPEAKER_02 31:10

Dude, that is a good dead air, a corpse's ceef. That that that's a that was a great joke.

SPEAKER_01 31:18

Dad joke reinvented. Surprised with myself. I'm actually pretty fucking surprised by that one. Come on, dude. What the fuck? You can't be surprised. I'm not surprised. That was good though. A corpse's ceef. I'm gonna steal that. Actually, you heard it on here first, y'all. A corpse's ceef can also be referred to as dead air.

SPEAKER_03 31:36

Oh no, that's podcasting case of podcasting. If we ever have dead air, somebody just has to say corpse's cleef. Oh dude. It's a bit, it's a bit that's good. That's good.

SPEAKER_01 31:46

Fucking air drop that down. That's good. That's a fucking bit. That's a bit. I like that one for sure. I like that.

SPEAKER_03 31:51

Um, yeah, I don't know what you want to what you want to chat about here. We didn't really have much on the docket. This podcast is kind of disjointed right now. We don't really have a we don't really have a format laid out yet. But I do so okay, so this is also so funny. So I didn't mean this to be like, I'd hope you didn't take this as me being like an asshole or anything. But so we started this, uh, me and Sean are good friends, we're great friends. We uh we have we have a normal we have a normal text chain, which we always use. We have a group chat with one of our other friends who were in, and then like we we communicate through all two of those two of those mediums all the time. So, but for the podcast, I was like, hey, maybe let's get like a like a WhatsApp group and we'll and we'll put ideas in there that like we could talk about on the pod. So I put a couple ideas in there, and Sean immediately was like, Oh hell yeah, I'll check these out. And I like, I don't know, I felt like a dickhead, but I was like, let's just use this for ideas. Like, you don't need to respond because we have two other group chats we do that in. Like, this is just an idea chat, bro. And after I sent that, I was like, man, I feel like a dickhead, but whatever, who cares?

SPEAKER_01 32:47

I know it wasn't even dude, I was fucked up when you sent me all that. Yeah, of course you were. Why aren't you? That was Saturday, wasn't it? Oh, yeah, Saturday. Yeah, I was fucked up.

SPEAKER_03 32:56

Damn, it was only 4:30 p.m. Jesus Christ, buddy. Chill out, chill out. Okay, so the big thing that I wanted to bring up, which is like completely disjointed, but it's a little bit of pop culture. So um, I don't know if you've seen it, but there was this video that went around where that kid Caleb McLaughlin from Stranger Things, the kid that plays Lucas, the black kid, the only black kid in the whole show. Ah, his sister's black, I guess. Yeah. Um, they don't really show his parents in that show, do they? No. Damn, he's adopted by a white family. I don't really recall ever seeing their parents. It's the 80s. There's no way those three white kids would hang out with a black kid unless he had white parents. Calling it right now, they're both adopted by white white parents. Anyway, so there was a video that came out. He was doing like this like a meet and greet or this, like these pictures. And uh again, I don't know if you've seen this video, but he's doing this this meet and greet with these pictures, and this girl comes up like a fan, she's like, Let's take a picture, and she asks him to do like the Spider-Man thing where like he shoots webs. Yeah, and he looks at her and he goes, No, no, no, no, no. And the only reason why he would be like, I can't do that, is because if he signed a contract or as an NBA or something where he can't speak about it. Yes, which is which is pretty cool. I seen that and I was like, Well, that's actually kind of kind of interesting.

SPEAKER_01 34:10

He would be a good Miles man for real.

SPEAKER_03 34:12

Yeah, also a big thing that I've heard people say online though is that like he's just black. He's Miles Morales is like uh Puerto Rican, like he's he's Spanish. Half black, half Puerto Rican Miles, yeah. Well, he's like the big his latest last name is Morales, like he speaks Spanish. Wait, it's not both is isn't his mom Spanish? I'm pretty sure he's fucking half black, half half Spanish. Uh I think he's just Puerto Rican, but and Puerto Rican.

SPEAKER_01 34:35

Puerto Rico is like Spanish. It's you know, there's their language.

SPEAKER_03 34:37

Well, what I was gonna say is Puerto Ricans are black. If you ever if you ever not seen a Puerto Rican say the N-word, like what are you talking about? Fat Joe, he's the whitest dude in the world, says the N-word. Pretty sure he's Puerto Rican or Dominican or something. Uh anyway, yeah, I thought that was pretty cool. I was like, damn, that'd be crazy if he came out as Miles Morales. Probably a pretty good acting. Also, I don't know if you've seen he's he's got like this shit on his Instagram where he's literally doing like acrobatics, like he's doing like front flips and like side flips and shit. Yeah, I seen that too, and I was like, uh, that'd be pretty cool. To be honest, pretty good casting. I wouldn't be mad at it. I wouldn't be mad at it. I've seen people online being like, eh, I don't know, but I'd be cool with it, man. Kids gotta do something after Stranger Things finish, man. Like, or he's gonna fade off into obscurity.

SPEAKER_01 35:18

Like, I I've I've like I'm I'm gonna be real. I I fancasted him as Miles Morales after like season three of Stranger Things. I was like, this guy's built for fucking Miles Morales.

SPEAKER_03 35:29

Damn, you were looking at his physique? Well, no, like his acting he's built. Damn, bro, back to this children shit that nobody likes. Oh my god, I've been thinking about I've been thinking about this. Like, what is the big like this was this was a good um would you rather? So would you rather your two-year-old daughter get raped and never remember it or your father die?

SPEAKER_01 35:58

What the fuck? I'd rather like I'd rather my father die.

SPEAKER_02 36:01

Damn, bro, she's not gonna remember it.

SPEAKER_01 36:04

Yeah, but then they fucking like, well, like he's gonna die anyways like fucking he's fucking like he's fucking your daughter's gonna get raped anyways.

SPEAKER_02 36:18

He's living a full he's living a full life already. It's completely fine.

SPEAKER_03 36:22

I think I I think I don't know. I think the girl on the podcast I was listening to was like, nah, it's fine enough for my daughter get raped.

SPEAKER_02 36:29

What the hell? She said that? Yeah, because she was like, she's not gonna remember anyway, and I love my dad. She was on, you know, side the box, like, bitch, your dad's gonna fucking die. Yeah, but again, your daughter is going to get raped. That's not a guarantee in life. You know what a guarantee in life is?

SPEAKER_03 36:45

That your dad is going to die taxes and rape, the three guarantees of life.

SPEAKER_01 36:53

That bitch was not fucking thinking when she answered that question.

SPEAKER_03 36:56

Nah, she was just being a good person, dude. What do you mean? You keep everybody alive. Why do you want to kill people, bro? Jesus Christ.

SPEAKER_02 37:07

Why are you trying to kill people, man? Fucked up. Fucking. I'm not killing anybody. You're killing your dad. He's gonna die to himself. Wait, he didn't rape her?

SPEAKER_01 37:20

No fucking fucking it's life, it happens. People die. Not everybody gets raped, but everybody dies. It's fucking like, you know, bro. From my experience, everybody gets raped. I mean, the government's raping us all. I mean, if we want to go that way.

SPEAKER_03 37:36

Bro, anybody who didn't get raped as a kid was obviously just an ugly ass kid. Yo, fuck. Tell me you were an ugly ass kid without telling me you were an ugly ass kid. Did you get raped or not? I never got raped. Ugly, bro. Bald.

SPEAKER_02 37:54

Ugly, bald. Tiny dick. Who wants to put that tiny little dick in their mouth?

SPEAKER_01 38:02

It's like, dude, K that reminds me that episode of Always Study in Philadelphia, like Matt's like, if you molested Charlie and you molested McPoyles, why didn't he molest me?

SPEAKER_02 38:15

Nobody. It's nobody to want to get molested as a child. You fucking goes to the teacher's house in short shorts.

SPEAKER_03 38:26

That's why my son wears full-legged pants around me.

SPEAKER_01 38:29

You fucking, what are you doing, son? But do you want me to do it? Okay, those guys I I legit like swear to God they're comedic geniuses.

SPEAKER_03 38:43

Yeah, they're funny. I haven't seen much of their new stuff, but also Charlie Day is like literally one of has the greatest voice for voice acting ever. Luigi fucking he was in a Pixar movie. He was in Monsters University. Yep. He's been in so much good shit from it was in the Lego movie. He's got like the perfect voice acting voice that's like that I that I'm not mad at because usually I get a little bit upset when like bitch. Um a little bit upset when they do like a big ass movie. Like, I mean, even take Mario, for example, which like I'm not mad at most of it, but like so many people in that movie are just famous actors. Actually, you know what the biggest the biggest example of this is is Invincible. Yeah, Invincible has the craziest cast in the world with so many famous people. Yeah, man. And I bet you that their budget is crazy because of that. Not only because of the animation style, but because of how many fucking A-list actors they have in it. When like you could just hire an incredible voice actor for half the pay. Yeah, and like there's so many good voice actors out there.

SPEAKER_01 39:38

Fucking well, they got like Steven Ewing on there, they got JK Simmons, they got Sandra O, they have fucking like Aaron Paul, but they also got fucking like uh Jeffrey D. Morgan, they got so many fuck up people.

SPEAKER_03 39:49

That's the thing with that show, is they also have crazy big actors for roles that are two seconds. I think it was in like season three or something, or season two, but it was like they had a side little plot. It wasn't even like it wasn't even huge, but it was like uh these two girls in Egypt, and they were like going into this tomb or whatever.

SPEAKER_01 40:07

Oh, yeah, the fucking like the the the spirits like trying to like possess them and shit.

SPEAKER_03 40:10

Yeah, and that's like that's Ella Purnell for whatever reason for fucking six lines.

SPEAKER_01 40:17

Are you caught up? No, nothing. Oh, because they they do a callback to that. Oh, do they? Yeah, yeah. It's Ella Purnell again, I bet. Oh, yeah, it is, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 40:23

Yeah, and they fired Zachary Quinto for whatever reason.

SPEAKER_01 40:27

Yeah, they they like well, Zachary Quinto is the part of like a new show now. I'm pretty sure like it was like a schedule conflict. So they just got like fucking like uh what the hell's his name? A Ross Marquon.

SPEAKER_03 40:37

What do you mean schedule conflict recorded in a fucking bedroom, dude? It's a voice roll. What are you talking about? Scheduling, it's literally you go into a studio and you go, huh?

SPEAKER_01 40:46

He said he's too busy meanwhile. I don't know where the fuck Zachary Quinto has been besides Invincible after fucking Star Trek and Heroes. Like that was the big thing that blew him up, right?

SPEAKER_03 40:55

It was heroes and then Star Yeah, Star Trek. So now man, that Star Trek cast was banging. Holy fuck. Those three Star Trek movies kind of fucking bang.

SPEAKER_01 41:02

Dude, I'm not gonna lie to you. I fucking I prefer them over the actual original television series.

SPEAKER_03 41:08

Yeah, but we're also young as fuck. So like that shit probably resonates with us way more because it looks so good.

SPEAKER_01 41:14

Well, I like the one with Patrick Stewart, you know, fucking like uh that shit was Next Generation or whatever. Yeah, Star Trek Next Generation. The end of that movie, Tom Hardy's first role was in fucking Star Trek Nemesis. Pretty cool. That's fucking pretty cool, dude. That's pretty cool, man. That's pretty fucking cool.

SPEAKER_03 41:29

Tom Hardy's just that secret badass, too. I'm sure everybody's seen this online, but he like entered that jujitsu tournament like as just a dude and like just like crushed shit. And he won. Yeah, it's crazy. Absolutely insane. I love I like Tom Hardy, he's great.

SPEAKER_01 41:44

I feel like uh like if if there was like ever an apocalypse and like a like it had like struck like Hollywood or whatever, you know what I'm saying? Like the two celebrities to like survive would be fucking Keanu Reeves and Tom Hardy. You got Tom Hardy out there choking up motherfuckers, you got Keanu Reeves running around shooting motherfuckers.

SPEAKER_03 42:02

Hell no, dude. If the apocalypse comes, Keanu Reeves, like, take me to be with the rest of my family, they're all dead. Oh fucking everybody at Keanu's Reeves life dies, dude. Jesus Christ, that dude's got a sad life. He's like a curse? Yeah, then it's like his like girlfriend died, his mom died, his sister died, like a bunch of people died in his life, like in a span of like three years. Like everybody died on him. And he's just fucking croaks at him. Yeah, dude. I think he might be killing them.

SPEAKER_02 42:30

I think Keanu Reeves. He might be the black widow of Hollywood, dude.

SPEAKER_01 42:35

Holy fucking shit. Fucking Keanu Reeves. More like Keanu bleeds. Damn.

SPEAKER_03 42:42

That was deep. Got him. Alright. Um, yeah, I don't know what else. What else? What else we got here? Um I got crazy. I got lots of shit though, to be honest. Um so bring it up. So Bring it up. Um, this one is crazy. This one's actually crazy. So I've been playing Crimson Desert, as Sean knows.

SPEAKER_01 42:59

You're fucking your balls deep in that game.

SPEAKER_03 43:01

Balls deep in that game. You know what's the craziest thing? I've never had a game where I'm 117 hours in. Hear that. 117 hours played game, three trophies. That's fucking wild. Three trophies. So the thing I wanted to bring up is that the game's been platinum, I think maybe now, probably by more people, but what's today? The ninth? Yeah, but on the seventh, I think it was, the sixth person in the world platinumed it. Jesus Christ. The game had been out for 428 hours.

SPEAKER_01 43:27

The dude fucking platinum.

SPEAKER_03 43:28

It took him 305 of those 428 hours to platinum it.

SPEAKER_01 43:32

What the fuck?

SPEAKER_03 43:33

And he was the sixth person to do it. I think the first person to do it was 274 hours platinum, which is crazy. It's like I was thinking about that, and like, you know, we got some friends that are platinum demons. Yeah, Lucas, why don't you try platinum this game instead of those easy games, you pussy?

SPEAKER_01 43:47

Dude, I'm telling you, man, fucking some of those games that he's like platinum, he's platinum, fucking like Elden Ring. I mean, it's actually it is an easy platinum. But fucking, but like uh I haven't platinum it yet, but Elder Ring's probably just a checklist, it's probably pretty.

SPEAKER_03 44:00

It's a check. It is a checklist. Probably pretty easy. That's the thing. Most games are a checklist, but like this Crimson Desert game is crazy. So, like to platinum it, you have to do literally everything in the game. Literally everything you have to discover. Like, you know, in like Red Dead, how you gotta like discover creatures and shit, like hunt creatures. Yeah. Same thing in this game, except there's more creatures than you could ever possibly think of. There's bugs, there's deer, there's like there's wooden animals, there's fish, there's fucking legendary creatures. Last night I was bored. So I've been playing the game so much that I'm there's 12 chapters in the game. I'm on chapter nine, and I've just I've just made it to the the titular Crimson Desert. Oh, you finally made it to Crimson Desert. I've been playing for the last couple days like crazy.

SPEAKER_01 44:42

So then you're on chapter two now, then, right? Chapter two or three? No, I just said chapter nine.

SPEAKER_03 44:46

Oh, oh, yeah. Yeah, I know. Chapter nine. Like chapter two, I think chapter chapter three is when the game opened. Like most people in the world that I've seen online are like, yo, I'm there. Like, so the first area you're in is Hernande. And lots of people are like, I haven't even left Hernande yet. Because there's five, I think there's five areas in the game. And like the first area is so big. After chapter three, the game opens up, they're like, do whatever you want. Do it, like you can still do story shit, but like explore. And lots of people have just like been like, I'm not doing any story, because the story's kind of whack. Um, they're like, I'm not doing any story shit, I'm just gonna do side shit, I'm just gonna explore. And lots of people are still very early in the game. I'm not, I did quite a bit of a story already, but I got to a point in the game last night where I was playing it, and I I had no more side missions to do. Like, the game is like populated, full of side missions, but lots of them you have to like discover. So, like in Red Dead Redemption, where you'll be walking down um a path, and then some uh dot will come up on the map and it will be like something. Exactly like that. Like a little side mission like that. Those in the game need to be discovered organically. They don't like with other side missions in the game, it will just be like you'll get a notification. So crimson new missions like that. Fucking you guys discovered. Exactly like that. Exactly like that. Like cool. There's this, there's uh so in the first area, I think I'm done like let's say like 80% of the missions, let's say 75 to be safe, but like a bunch of them are like legitimately, they're like tails from Hernan. So you have to you have to find them in the game organically. It's not gonna be like go here and do this. It's like no, find it. So I think if I'm trying to, if I'm if I ever try and platinum this game, which I don't know if I will, because it's it's gonna be a lot, a lot of work, but I'm definitely gonna have to use a guide because it's like there's no fucking way I'm finding any of this shit. They've already made an interactive map. I don't know if you ever use one of those in video games. Interactive map. Yeah, so it's basically a map that like it'll be on a website. You'll go to the website, uh, you'll pop up the map, and then you'll be click click custom things throughout the map. So in like in this game, it would be like you go to the interactive map and you're like, show me all of the caves, and then you push caves, and then the map will populate with all the caves.

SPEAKER_01 46:43

Yeah, I've I've used one of those uh before for like uh the forest and uh like Daisy and shit. Yeah, you have like an app on your phone.

SPEAKER_03 46:50

Yeah, it just makes it easier to like find shit. So yeah, man, like I'm gonna have to do that, but holy shit, bro. This game is absolutely insane. Haven't got the dragon yet, haven't got the mech suit yet. Um you'll get there. Apparently, well, I looked it up because I was like, I was like, how do you get a dragon? And they were like, Oh, you can't miss the dragon. Getting the dragon is part of the main story. I'm like, okay, how do you get the mech suit? They're like, you will not miss the mech suit as part of the main story. I'm like, Alright, cool. I guess I'm doing that shit.

SPEAKER_01 47:17

You gotta dive deep into the story now.

SPEAKER_03 47:20

Yeah, the only thing I would say about that game was it's kind of the shit that's kind of whack is like you got three characters, and the other two are not like very inspired to play as. We're like, it's weird that they didn't do it like this because you think it would have been better, but I guess because between the three characters and they they're all part of the same story. Not not even that, but just like a more engaging way to in to engage these characters. How like in the best example, obviously, and probably one of the only examples is Grand Theft Auto 5. Yeah, where that game forces you to switch characters. It says, No, you can like Michael, like I think as you start as Michael and Franklin at a certain point in the game, they're like, No, you can't play as either of them anymore. They're hiding. Yeah, they're hiding from the heist. Now you're playing as this character. Yeah, where in this game they do that, but it's like the first one, you're like, you're like your dude Cliff gets all fucked up, and then the the big orc guy Unka, you're like, okay, you gotta play as him. But literally, when you play as him, they're like, Okay, go to this one place, kill this guy, that's it. That's the whole thing. Then you can switch back. Shit. You play as a chick later on in the game, and they're like, Okay, go to this one place, kill this one guy, then you can switch back. And the big thing that kind of sucks is like unless you're unless you're going like crazy and grinding for these abyss artifacts, which are the things that level you up, every time you switch to a new character, you gotta respec all your skill points, yeah, so you can load them into that new character. Because like, unless unless you're a demon like hunting all these crazy abyss artifacts, then there's no way you're gonna have enough to upgrade all three of them. Like, you have to if you switch to the girl character, you have to take away all Cliff skill points and then reallocate them to the female character so that she's actually viable in combat. That fucking sucks. Yeah, it's kind of fucking lame to be honest. But that fucking sucks.

SPEAKER_01 48:58

So you're constantly fucking respecing then.

SPEAKER_03 49:00

Well, yeah, essentially. Yeah, and like the thing is the game doesn't make it hard for you to respec. They give you these items that are like that that you get that you can get a lot of and you can get them easily. So you can respec as much as you want. The biggest thing that's annoying is respecing and having to put each skill point individually into each skill tree, yeah, just to play as them for whatever how long you're gonna play as them.

SPEAKER_01 49:18

Yeah. But there is a cool thing in the game where you can um Do you think they'll make an update where they get like where like each character has like their own individual fucking thing?

SPEAKER_03 49:26

I don't think so. I don't think they'll do that because like that's already so tied into the game where like like you like these abyss artifacts that I'm talking about aren't hard to find. Like you get one every time you do a puzzle, you get one every time you kill a boss, you get one every time you do like a puzzle in the sky. So there's a lot of them. Like, I think I have my character pretty much all the way maxed out almost, and I still have like 29 skill points or abyss artifacts, but those abyss artifacts are also used to upgrade gear. Okay, so it's not just used for your skill tree, like you'll get a geek, you could upgrade things to like level 10 or 11 or something, and then once you get to a high enough thing, you need that as a material to upgrade your shit. So it makes it like we're like you're using it otherwise to upgrade your character, upgrade your shit, and it's like I don't know. That's one part where I'm like, it's kind of fucking lame. The cool part is which I which I only did for the first time yesterday, is you can um you can summon your friends, like you could summon the dudes, you could summon Umka, you could summon the other chick, and then when when they summon to you, you can um like what is it? Like like you you press a button and then like it reloads, and then you guys are all together, and then they'll travel with you and fight alongside you. So that's pretty cool. That's pretty cool. That's pretty cool. And then you can seamlessly switch between them with no loading screen. In the middle of a fight. While you're playing, yeah. Like you could just you could go up to the go up to the character wheel and switch to the other one, and it will just jump over, no like loading screen or anything. Which is pretty cool. That's pretty cool.

SPEAKER_01 50:48

Yeah, that is pretty tight. Fucking I do I am gonna get that game eventually. Um, but I I think I'm gonna fucking beat the Witcher 3 first, because I haven't beaten the Witcher 3 yet. I haven't beaten the game yet. That's crazy. I fucking like I took a break when Ghost of Yote came out. When Ghost of Yote came out, I played that, and then when I beat Ghost of Yote, for some reason I played Elden Ring again, and then after Elden Ring, I played Dark Souls 3 and then Sakiro, and I went down like this rabbit hole.

SPEAKER_03 51:16

Yeah. Did you beat Ghost of Yote? Oh yeah, I did, yeah. Okay, hold on. I just want to look at I think I'm a platinum that game.

SPEAKER_01 51:24

I'm I'm definitely not. I'm like 66% or something like that. Yeah, that gives that game's easy to platinum if you want to like platinum again. I'm gonna try. I'm gonna attempt it. Not exactly like a platinum chaser, but I definitely am chasing that platinum for Elder Ring eventually.

SPEAKER_03 51:42

Yeah, platinum, but they also added a bunch of shit now. They have new game plus on GoCo 2 now.

SPEAKER_01 51:47

Oh shit, yeah they do. Yeah, they have new game plus now. Pretty cool. Yo, I'm gonna take a piss, man, hold down the fork, crack some jokes, I'll be here.

SPEAKER_03 51:56

Yeah, bro, uh Corpse Queef. Oh, he's gonna fucking fucking tissues on the floor, dude. Oh, I stuck to my foot, bro.

unknown 52:16

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 52:17

Oh, yucky!

SPEAKER_02 52:20

I think we did a good portion on this, but let's go back. Let's circle back. I'm gonna circle back real quick.

SPEAKER_01 52:24

Put a button on it. Put a button on it. I'm circling back real quick. You ever take a piss and it's like misty? Like, fuck it, like, you know, like it's like you know, like, what do you think that is? You think do you think that's cum? Like a misty.

SPEAKER_03 52:36

Did you jerk off before I came here? No, I didn't, no. Are you lying? I'm not lying. It smells like common dude. It smells like a jar of common here. Fuck it. I don't know. I've never I've only had like misty pisses after I've just freshly came. Huh. Interesting. Or, or, oh no, you know what I was reading the other day? I was reading the other day. If you have misty pisses, 100% you have AIDS, don't even need to get a test. Fuck you. You didn't have a misty piss? I just had a misty piss. Holy shit, dude. Okay, no more drinking from my can, please. No more staring cans. Is that an actual thing? I'm fucking Misty Piss is uh means 100% AIDS. That's what it that's what I read online anyway. Misty Piss AIDS Misty Piss equals AIDS. Put that in. That will come up real.

SPEAKER_01 53:27

Cloudy or misty urine is a symptom.

SPEAKER_00 53:33

What does it say? Oh my god. What does it say?

SPEAKER_01 53:37

Okay, it can't like indicate uh UTIs. Yeah, what are you a female? Very common cause.

SPEAKER_03 53:44

What are you a female?

SPEAKER_01 53:46

STIs like fucking goneria or chlamydia.

SPEAKER_03 53:50

Uh really STIs, is that what that means?

SPEAKER_01 53:53

Yeah regarding AIDS. HIV cannot be transmitted to urines but saliva or tears. Yes, it can cause misty urine.

unknown 54:06

Fuck!

SPEAKER_01 54:06

Alright, word.

SPEAKER_03 54:07

Yeah, dude. That's why I make you wear a condom when you fuck me. Can I get another beer off of you? I only got one more we gotta share it after. You gotta have some of this one even though you got fucking AIDS mouth. I don't have AIDS. It literally has AIDS mouth. Aid's mouth, AIDS fucking dick.

SPEAKER_01 54:22

That's actually fucking wild. You were like semi-right. This is crazy.

SPEAKER_03 54:27

Yeah, there's no way I just made that up.

SPEAKER_01 54:30

I thought I thought like, oh, this good this dude's making shit up.

SPEAKER_03 54:32

I mean, I was I mean, I was just being sarcastic. I definitely made it up. You did make it swing for the fences, and sometimes you hit, brother. Sometimes you hit a homer, brother. Sometimes you're right. Sometimes you're right. Yeah, sometimes you hit a homer, bro. No big hitting dangers off this pussy.

SPEAKER_01 54:48

Where the fuck is my weed pen?

SPEAKER_03 54:50

Fell on the floor, didn't it?

SPEAKER_01 54:53

Fucking must have. I'll look for it later. I will look for it later. You got a weed pen or anything?

SPEAKER_03 54:59

Femboy. Oh yeah, so I I read something online. I don't know. You can tell me if this is true. So I read something online that like uh dudes who have like LED lights in their room are using it as a fishing lure for fenboys. I don't know how true this is, but I'm looking on the wall right now and I see hella LED lights and hella gay gay sex toys.

SPEAKER_02 55:20

So I'm just wondering if this is like if the lights are the lure or the or the double-ended dildos are.

SPEAKER_01 55:30

It's definitely the lights. That's what I thought.

SPEAKER_03 55:33

Double-ended dildos are just a ploy. It's just a it's just it's just for a fun thing, you know.

SPEAKER_01 55:37

The lights are prettier, pretty's up the experience. Yeah, it makes it makes the dudes not look like dudes so much.

SPEAKER_03 55:46

Wow, these lights really make you look like a woman. Corpse queef. My son, okay, he's good. His feet are growing, his hands are growing, his cock is ding the same size. I don't know what's going on here, but we're we're gonna see a doctor tomorrow, and I gotta ask him what's up with his penis? What's up with his tiny penis? He might be microwed up. He might be microwed up. Maybe he microed up. Microed up, dude. He might be the first micro in our family. Oh, that sucks, man. Because I don't got a micro, it is tiny, but like the girls gotta stop being greedy bitches, dude. How much, how many inches do you need, slut? Jesus Christ. Be happy with what you got. Why do you need so much, fat bitch? Jesus Christ, eating so much cock all the time. Size queens do exist. Yeah, you know what we call them? Whores.

SPEAKER_02 56:40

Pretty good. Pretty good. We're synced up, dude. Our periods are flowing.

SPEAKER_01 56:47

Fuck it, it's funny how we both went there. That was awesome. That was good. Oh, in case you didn't know, me and Ray had to dap each other up after that. That was like a that was a beautiful cincture.

SPEAKER_03 57:00

You ever dap a dude up with your penis? That's what we just did. We docked. Oh, dude. Do you got foreskin? Yeah. Fuck yeah, we can dock. Oh, dude. You got one too? I don't got foreskin. We could use yours. Oh my god, we could use mine. Yeah. Damn, that's sick. Okay, next next episode, we're docking.

SPEAKER_01 57:17

It's pretty, it's pretty sick.

SPEAKER_03 57:19

We're gonna get the cameras and we're gonna film the dock.

SPEAKER_01 57:22

You can thank my dad for that. He thinks it's a fucking barbaric.

SPEAKER_03 57:25

Yeah, I'll make sure to go downstairs and thank him for that.

SPEAKER_02 57:28

Hey Rod, hey Mike, thanks for getting this dick nice. Thanks for not cutting it off. Thanks for not chopping it.

SPEAKER_01 57:35

I can dock your son now.

SPEAKER_03 57:37

Dude. Me and your son have been docking all night. You guys thought we were podcasting? That was just a ploy. We just played audio while we docked.

SPEAKER_01 57:46

Fucking now. Everyone's gonna know that I'm fucking not snipped. Yeah. Well, no, there's not no illusion there anymore. Who gives a fuck? Dick's a dick.

SPEAKER_03 57:55

I got my dick gives a fuck. You know what's funny? I heard this on a podcast. I'm stealing it 100%, but I thought this was funny. That um that we call uncircumcised dick uncircumcised when that's just dick. That's just dick normal dick. It's just normal dick, but we call uns like we call on we give it a term that makes it seem taboo.

SPEAKER_01 58:13

Fucking like it's crazy how it all stems from religion, too, man. Fucking circumstance circumcision all stems from fucking Judaism. Fucking like and shit. It's fucking ridiculous. And like now it's like some like you know, like just like fucking like popularized thing, like everyone's getting fucking sniffed. Uh-oh, here we go.

SPEAKER_03 58:30

Anti-Semitic rant in comfortable.

SPEAKER_01 58:32

I'm not I'm not anti- I'm not gonna fucking say anything anti-Semitic.

SPEAKER_03 58:34

I'm just they control the weather and the banks. Why do you think it's still snowing in Canada? The Jews don't want us to be warm.

SPEAKER_01 58:43

I'm just saying it's crazy how it all stems from religion.

SPEAKER_02 58:47

Okay, it's just wild.

SPEAKER_03 58:49

I love Jews. I'm the I'm the I'm I'm pro-Semitic, dude. Okay, I'm fully Semitic, dude. I'm pro-Semitic, no, you're not, dude. Stop trying to hide behind this facade.

SPEAKER_01 59:02

Okay, just just don't influence the just don't influence me to fucking snip my fucking child, dude.

SPEAKER_02 59:07

Okay, you know who influenced me and sniped my child?

SPEAKER_03 59:10

God. I said, God. I said, I said a girl's gonna want to suck this in the future and pulling back that dirty foreskin and seeing some schmeg, dude, she's not gonna want to put that in her mouth.

SPEAKER_01 59:21

Fucking God mean this in his image.

SPEAKER_02 59:24

But it's like, but you gotta snip the penis. He said, Cut the tip off, dude.

SPEAKER_03 59:29

Cut the tip off. You ever use a have you ever done construction do a caulking gun? How do you think you get the cock out, dude? You gotta snip it off. God damn, that's also a good joke. Yeah, it is.

SPEAKER_02 59:39

They both mean cock, they both mean cock. Oh my god, you gotta snip the tip off to get the juice out. Okay, but that's fucking that's so crazy. Like God made this in his image, but you have to snip the tip off.

SPEAKER_03 59:51

Yeah, well, who wouldn't, dude? I cut my girlfriend's clit off, too, dude. Sharia law. Fucking, I Africanized her. Cut that clit off, dude. Stop having pleasure.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:01

Sharia law.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:02

Yeah, dude. That's fucking crazy how that shit actually exists in life. I mean, fucking stop having such giant clits, girls. Fucking guys, shave that thing down, dude. Take a couple inches off the top.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:15

It's like fucking joystick, dude. Or like a fucking thumb.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:20

Oh, bruh.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:21

I love a good thumb thumb fucking spot for my thumb. I don't know. Jesus Christ. I play with it too. It's okay. Falling apart. Falling apart. Or falling apart.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:31

Get back in it. Get back in it.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:32

Corpse Queef. So there's a show on Apple TV. It's called Hijack. Word. And it's Idris Elba, isn't it? Idris, whatever the fuck you want to say. That's Idris. Um Idris. I think it's Idris. Whatever, dude. I'm never saying an African name right. Give me a break. Um no, but there's this movie called Hijack, and he's like, he's like uh I forget what he plays, he's like a negotiation specialist for like big companies. So like he would he comes in and he negotiates for them. But like the move the show is not like an action show. It is Idris Elba just fucking talking to hijackers. But there's this one part in the show, first episode. I think I took a picture of it on my phone. I'm gonna see if I found it. But so he's looking at his phone, and this show is about a plane that gets hijacked in the sky. And in this show, he gets That's usually where they happen.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:20

That's usually a more it's like where the majority of hijacks happen is when a plane's in the sky. Very good point. You know what, Sean? Touche.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:32

Uh oh yeah, so I have it right here. So he gets a this is like the first the first episode. He gets a text mess or he sends a text message at 9-11 and it shows it on his phone. And I'm like, what a weird Easter egg to have in the fucking show about a hijack. Oh, yeah, yeah, joking about it. I didn't take a picture of it. I was like, what the fuck is this? This is a weird Easter egg. Like take off 9-11. But that's the thing, it's not even he's not even saying 9-11, he's just sending a text message, and for whatever reason, they had to put in the time in the phone of 9-11, and I'm like, okay, what a weird Easter egg to have. I think Marvel should start doing Easter eggs like that. Like they should do like fucking 9-11, they should do the fucking Holocaust, they should do like put like 1939 in there or something. Oh, put like April 20th, Hitler's birthday or something.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:23

Oh yeah, that'd be good. That's why everyone gets stoned on fucking April 20th, man. It's because we're all actually like low-key celebrating Hitler's birthday.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:31

Yeah, I mean, who wouldn't? He was a legend. Okay, fucking legend, dude. Literally, literally going down in history forever, dude.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:38

Fucking sig high, dude.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:40

Shut up, bro. Jesus Christ. I got you forgot. You didn't tell me to bring my robe today. You didn't tell me to bring my pointy hat.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:49

I said hi, not how. You know, it was like a play on words.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:52

I seen the best shirt ever the other day. It was um, so it was it said R A blank um I S T. And then it was uh Morpheus handing the blue and red pill, and it was a P and a C. So depending on which pill you take, they would have said rapist or racist. I said, that might be the best shirt I've ever seen in my life.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:13

You know what's crazy? If you're rich enough, they're both socially acceptable.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:18

Yeah, I mean, even if you're not rich enough, bro. Um, so yeah, I think we should do this uh this movie. I mean, this is probably off pod talk, but it's fine. We'll do it here. I think we should probably do this movie because I think it would be a fun thing to talk about. Um so it's the new Gain Maderazo movie. The pizza movie. So it's like he's uh he went from Stranger Things to doing a stoner comedy. It's literally a stoner comedy. And like when's the last time a stoner comedy got made? Been a while.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:46

I think since like fucking goddamn Pineapple Express. I want to say Pineapple Express.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:51

I mean the last good one anyway. Um and uh no, so it's funny because the reason that this came up my feed a little callback is because he was on Mark Norman's podcast. We might be drunk. Him and this other actor were on it, and I was like, oh, that's weird. Why is this kid on this really famous comedy podcast that I listened to? And then I checked out he's promoting this movie, and I looked it up and I was like, Whoa, he's doing a stoner comedy. This is probably gonna be so fucking atrocious. We should watch it. And then I looked up the cast, and I don't know if you ever, I mean, this is completely off topic, but have you ever heard of this guy named Caleb Heron?

SPEAKER_01 1:04:25

Caleb Heron, no, I haven't.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:26

Also a comedian, fat gay dude. Um, really funny. Like one of the was so funny, and he kind of got pop well, he got popular because he's really funny, and he's like uh not because he's fat and gay. That as well, but he he really got popular because Time, I think it was Time magazine, didn't he? That's Tim Dillon. And Ralphie May, probably. No, just getting the white. Most famous comedians are white, let's be real. Dave Chappelle broke through the barrier, good for him. Um, but no, uh, so Caleb Aaron's he was he's he's blew up, or he's pretty famous because he timed to this top 100 influential people of our time or whatever, or influencers or whatever, and he was number six above Mr. Beast, who was number seven, and Mr. Beast tweeted out and he was like, Yo, who the fuck is this guy with less than a million followers that's more influential than me? And everybody was like, Yo, Mr. Beast is salty, and Caleb Heron was like, Dude, that's so funny. Either way, really funny dude. I think it might be good because he's in it, but probably not because he's probably got a small role. But I think we should watch it. We should uh we should we should break it down. I think that would be a fun episode.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:38

Should we watch it while we're potting? I don't know. Maybe it's like we'll watch it and then break it down.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:44

Yeah, I think I think what the best thing to do is like the same thing we do with Daredevil, which is watch it, make notes, think of things to talk about, and then like I mean, I'm stealing format here, but this is how every movie podcast does it is you watch the movie and then you just literally break down the movie from start to finish on the podcast and make fun of it at the same time.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:00

Very true. Yeah. Fucking I still need to watch that new episode of Daredevil. I'm watching the boys right now. I'm on episode two of the season five. And so far it's fucking a banger, dude. Yeah, they only released two episodes. Yeah, they released two episodes yesterday.

SPEAKER_03 1:06:14

I wonder why they didn't do three like they always do. Like Amazon's pretty pretty known for that. Like when Invincible drops, three episodes. Yeah. When The Boys drops, it's usually three episodes. Jen V drops three episodes. Reacher drops three episodes. Like those are their four biggest shows on the platform. Oh, that's actually something else I wanted to talk about. We talked about it on pod yesterday. Or no, on uh text yesterday. And I think it's funny. Like it's it's not funny, it's also kind of weird. Because like lots of these streaming services do not release numbers. They don't they like Netflix doesn't tell you how many people are watching something. They never do. They keep that shit usually secret until they want to tell people. Yeah. Where like with cable and all that other thing, you know every year how many people are watching the Super Bowl. They tell you it's like ratings. 48 million people or whatever. Like how many people tuned in? Where Netflix doesn't tell you any of that stuff, and those streaming services really like to have like a number one show. Like a number one show is like big for them. Like it's it's huge. Like, is and that's what I think that's why they did Stranger Things this way. So uh last season they did four episodes, four episodes, one episode, or four episodes, three episodes, one episode, whatever they did.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:17

Yeah, that's that's what it was.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:18

Yeah, four episodes, three episodes, one episode, and they split them up. So they did release the first four episodes. Which are fucking awesome, which was the best part of the season. Yeah, um, Stranger Things became number one, obviously, on Netflix, and then they released the next three episodes like a month later, while it was still number one, which carried it to keep the number one spot, and then they released the last episode on New Year's or whatever, which again kept the number one spot. Like, no, those those streaming services love to have a number one show because it makes them look great or whatever. But like I think it's weird how Amazon is like Invincible is streaming right now, and then we're also gonna drop the boys at the same time because those are two of their biggest shows on the platform, and they're both fucking awesome. But only one can be number one, yeah. Only one can have that number one spot. So that means you're taking one of your best shows and saying, no, this show is number two now because this show is out. Like, usually every other year, they space out their content pretty well where this show will this show will air, number one show. They'll add another show to the rotation. Boom, that show comes in, number one show, then they'll have the next one where it's number one show. And then all those all those shows have a chance to get that number one spot and keep it, which is huge for ratings, it's huge probably for their bragging rights, whatever. But like, I think it's weird how they're releasing both these shows at the same time. Like, I don't think that that benefits them at all. I don't think it's smart, I think it's probably one of the dumbest things they've done. I think that goes against their like business model of being like, because what is the point of having the number one show if it's if you're gonna release another show and it can't be number one? Like, they want both these shows to be number one. Yeah, because number one show is a good thing. Like, like I said, they never release numbers. Netflix will release numbers like once a year, and they'll be like, oh, this was our biggest thing ever. And it's like nobody, nobody can nobody can back that up but you. Like, it's not like we have the numbers, like with cable where all the studios or whatever have the numbers. I don't know. It's kind of weird, and like, but no, I haven't watched any of I watched like one and a half episodes of Invincible. I haven't watched any of the boys yet, and I watched Daredevil yesterday, and fucking goddamn Daredevil was so good.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:13

I heard it was a banger. It's the like the top-rated episode of like the new season.

SPEAKER_03 1:09:20

It makes sense, dude. It's crazy. There's like I really wish we would have talked you would have watched it because I well, I didn't like that's the thing. So, unless unless we specifically say, which probably is another off-topic or off-mic pod or off-mic topic, if if we want to talk about something, the other person has to know so they can watch it. But like, so I can't wait. We need to be watching it tonight. So I watched Daredevil season four episode four last night, and this is how many notes I took. Like, I have I have taken notes. I have hella talking points for this shit. Fucking Delhi, man. So I uh so yeah, I don't know. It's good. There's also a crazy thing that happens at the end, which I think is gonna kick off the show or a certain character into the character that they're supposed to be in the comics. Okay, which is gonna be like which I think is gonna make the show complete a whole 180, especially with one character's dynamic. Um, which I think we talked about, I don't know if it was on Mike or on the other podcast. It hasn't been released yet. No. Bullseye is heavily in this episode, though, and he's got one of the maybe two of the coolest scenes ever. Like no, okay, three of the coolest scenes ever, dude. It's crazy. There's a Daredevil V Bullseye fight in this episode, which I was when I was watching it, I was like, oh, this is some of the coolest shit ever. Like, it's so it I don't know, it's so sick. Also, the show starts with Bullseye. The whole first five minutes or ten minutes is like a bullseye just a bullseye fucking hour, bullseye minute, and like, man, it's so good. So good. And I was I was wondering, so when before the show came out, I know Kristen Ritter was definitely confirmed. Like Jessica Jones is in it.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:52

Yeah, she's in it.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:53

Is that the only one that's in it? Is is Mike Coulter in it as well? Did Luke was Luke Cage on set? I don't remember.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:58

I'm not too sure, man. I I I I think I I I do recall them, like I do recall spottings of Coulter, but like I could be misremembering. But I do know for a fact Jessica Jones is in there because she was in the fucking trailer.

SPEAKER_03 1:11:13

That's a big thing up too about the show, or probably I won't say anything about the new episode, but this whole season where they're like where they're like uh anti-vigilante task force, um, no vigilantes in the city, whatever, blah blah blah. I I imagine this is how the show is gonna end, and it might not, but I mean this would make sense. Maybe not now with how the the episode, whatever. This this was my theory. I and and I think like if they don't do it this way, it's kind of like, well, that's kind of unrealistic. New York has so many superpowered heroes in it. Jessica Jones, Luke Cage, Daredevil to some extent, Bullseye now at this point because he's Spider-Man Spider-Man, but I don't iron fists. I don't know if they're ever gonna show Spider-Man in this in this uh in this show, which I mean I think it would be cool if they did, but I don't think they will. They will because it's Sony or some shit. But yeah, it's it's funny how like the the whole season is like anti-vigilante task force where it's like if all these crazy superpowered vigilantes just teamed up again, like they did in defenders, yeah, they would just win. Yeah, they all have superpowers. Luke Cage Luke Cage is basically invincible, Jessica Jones is basically invincible. Yeah, Daredevil's a fucking ninja. Yeah. Um, I don't know if they're gonna bring that guy Finn back for like uh Iron Fist, but like I mean he would be cool. Like the power of a dragon in his fucking hand. I mean it would be cool, but like if they literally, I think if they don't do that for the end of the episode, the end of the season, because it would make sense, um um like for the for the tone of the show, because the whole tone of this season is no vigilantes, no nothing. We can't do vigilantes. All the vigilantes come back out, team up, take down Fisk, take down the city, the city's back to normal. Yeah, I think that would be a great ending because it would also it would also bring back all these great characters, like Jessica Jones. Uh the the first season of that show, David Tennant is probably top three best Marvel villains of all time.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:59

Yeah, man, he was fucking terrifying, dude. You fucking scared the shit out of me, man. Fucking Jessica Jones's fucking like tone was just like just perfect, ma'am. I I I loved that first season of Jessica Jones. Yeah, because it was literally literally just about a girl getting raped. Yeah and then having to fight her rapist. And drinking alcohol all the time. Getting banged by Mike Holter. Banged by Mike Holter, fighting her rapist. Bangs the shit out of them.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:24

I mean her. Whatever. She's probably banging him.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:26

Yeah, she I they're banging. They're banging.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:28

Uh yeah, but I don't know. You should definitely watch the episode. I'm gonna watch the boys probably like tonight or something. I don't know. I think you should. It's really good. Again, like, do you think uh like so with the boys? I think like I think the smart thing for them to do would be to change the ending from the book. Oh, definitely, definitely because they've already changed so much stuff in that show.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:49

They changed so much. The major thing they changed though that really pisses me off, which is hilarious, is like the whole reason why mother's milk is called mother's milk.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:59

Oh, yeah, because he drinks titty milk that makes him strong. Like compound V titty milk.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:02

Yeah, fucking because he's he's like born with like fucking like superhuman strength, and the only way that he can maintain maintain his superhuman strength is if he drinks his mother's fucking milk because it's rich with fucking compound V. Compound V.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:15

Yeah, it's funny. They don't like he doesn't have superhuman strength on the show at all. No, he's just a dude. He's just a dude. He's just a dude. Yeah, that's which yeah, like and then they change Black Noir, like, which was a big pivotal thing in the show in the book.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:25

Black Noir is the fucking clone of a poem right here.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:28

Like they change all that stuff. I think it would be like incongruent to the tone of the show now for them to be like, no, we're ending it the same as the book ended, because that's not what you've done the whole show. Yeah, like if you're not gonna follow the comic book from the beginning, then do your own thing. Because they've done well with it so far by doing that.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:44

I think the show's story is honestly better than the comic book story. The comic book story is basically just like, let's just do a bunch of outlandish shit and see where we go. But the comic book is a lot more funner, like it's just like fucking hilarious. But the story and the narrative of the TV show is done a lot more better, I find.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:05

Yeah, and I mean, uh that that shit just completely ruined her face. Yeah. Goddamn, that shit Aaron Moriarty was so hot in the first season, and then now she looks like a goddamn Barbie doll. She looks like a plastic fucking piece of fucking rubber, dude. She looks terrible. It's crazy how bad she looks.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:21

Like, okay, they do she got like so much like terrible plastic surgery, but it's funny in this season, it looks like she's like trying to like get more plastic surgery to look like how she used to look. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:32

It's fucking going backwards. Yeah, going backwards. Yeah, like she's she's her face is so full of Botox now, she can't even emote anymore. Like, she can't even display emotions. Like, it's like it makes it seem it's like, okay, this is fucking weird, dude.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:46

Yeah, kind of like uh what's her face there? 11 and in the last season. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, 100%, 100%. It's like she was like farming the whole time.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:57

Yeah, dude. I don't know. That last season, that last season was I don't know, it was not it. Fucking it was not it for me. I mean, the first half was good, but like the last not it. It was not it. I didn't mind the last hour. I actually think that might have been my the most the the shittiest part of the show for me was when they were like, all right, Vecna's this badass motherfucker, one of the most badass motherfuckers in this show, so strong, dead in 10 five minutes. Five minutes. Literally, the fight scene was so short. I think what it was is I seen this online. I think the fight scene at the end of season four took a while.

SPEAKER_01 1:16:32

It was shorter than Will's fucking coming out scene.

SPEAKER_03 1:16:35

And like it was shorter than him them killing Vecna. It's like, okay, I guess. Fuck it.

SPEAKER_01 1:16:40

I don't know. Yeah, Will's coming out scene had more fucking screen time than the final fight with Vecna. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:16:47

Me too, me too, me too. It's like, what are you doing here? Aren't you the new character in the season? You don't even know him. Also, like, I think a big thing that somebody pointed out online was like Hopper just came back, he's been gone for like years, yeah, and he comes back and Will's like, I'm gay, and he's like, What the fuck is happening? He's like, What is going on? Joyce, what have you done to this kid? Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:10

He's fucking like everyone's like sitting around there, and he's like, What the fuck is going on?

SPEAKER_03 1:17:14

Hopper had to stop himself from punching Will in the face because he's beat up so many gay people in his life. He's like, Don't hit him, don't hit him, don't hit him. Yeah, I don't know. This is kind of whack, dude, to be honest.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:28

They didn't need it. I don't like I don't know what the fuck. Like, and the whole like his whole reason is like, I'm not afraid anymore. But what the fuck did he do in the final fight to justify any of that shit? I can now fight Vecna. It's like fucking like I came out of the closet, I'm no longer afraid, Vecna can't control me. Yeah, and the fucking final fight's like you're barely even fucking there, bro. Fuck it. Like all your worst fucking fears never came true.

SPEAKER_03 1:17:55

Yeah, it's also funny how he's like, he's like, yo, I'm gonna tell everyone you're gay, you're gonna be alone forever, and you're gay, and nobody's gonna like you because it's the 80s. And then the show ended and he killed Vecna, and guaranteed that still happened to him. Guaranteed nobody still liked him because he was gay in the 80s and definitely had AIDS.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:10

That final shot, him and that, him and his like little boyfriend at the bar. I guarantee when they left that bar, they got their asses kicked. Yeah, like it was fucking the 80s. Well, you clearly do a whole nice. And he's living in a big city. Fucking like they're getting fucking beat up all the time.

SPEAKER_02 1:18:26

Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:27

Yeah. I would have beat him up.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:31

He came up for nothing, dude. I literally beat up gays just to push down my gay. I beat up gays to repress my gay, dude.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:39

Okay. We're bringing it back to the cum here real quick. I feel like fucking we bring this back to the world.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:44

He bring it back, he brought it back to cum twice already.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:47

I know.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:47

And that's how you know this guy is a flaming homo. You're a gay homo, dude. You're double gay.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:53

Well, I'm fucking like, what is the record? It was like on my fucking like on my mind. What is the record? Record for what? How much fucking cum someone can hold in the jar? Oh, the longest storage.

SPEAKER_03 1:19:05

40 years. Yeah, I mean, well, sperm banks, right? Like that checks out. How do sperm banks work? You go there, you come in a thing, and then they just put it in some random lady.

unknown 1:19:14

I guess.

SPEAKER_03 1:19:15

That's weird. That's weird as fuck, bro.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:17

I guess. Like, I don't know what they do. They warm it up. Somehow it stays alive and it's frozen.

SPEAKER_03 1:19:22

Yeah, I mean, but like, I think the weird thing is like them being like, yo, this is just some random dude sperm. Like, yo, we're gonna shoot you up with fucking Kyle's Jiz. It's like, what, dude? Why Kyle, dude? Kyle sounds like a dickhead.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:36

I think they literally like choose, like they fucking like there's like a whole like list and it has like all their attributes that you're fucking selecting. Like you're selecting a fucking character from RP from an RPG.

SPEAKER_03 1:19:49

Ultimate number six with a side of seven, and put a little bit of set eight in my shake.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:54

You're literally creating a character build for a human being. That's sick, dude.

SPEAKER_03 1:19:59

I'd I definitely pick black sperm.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:03

Hi athleticism. I need that.

SPEAKER_03 1:20:05

Yeah, dude. I want my kid to have an extra bone in his ankle. You know that, right? Black people got an extra bone on their ankle. No way. That's what makes them rum fest. Get the fuck out. Look it up, bro.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:15

Oh my god. But before that, fucking listen to this. Fucking.

unknown 1:20:22

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:23

A case study on hyperspermia, which is a abnormally high volume of sperm, recorded in a single ejaculate of 10.8 milliliters. I just thought I had to throw that in.

SPEAKER_03 1:20:38

I don't know how much that is. How much is a milliliter?

SPEAKER_01 1:20:41

Uh that's like five liters of jazz.

SPEAKER_03 1:20:44

No, it's not? What the fuck? What the fuck? You thought you could get me on that one?

SPEAKER_02 1:20:50

God damn, this is an elephant dick!

SPEAKER_01 1:20:53

God damn, this boy hit me with the elephant trunk. Okay, do black people fucking crazy have an extra bone? We're gonna find out. Of course I do. Because Google is our friend.

SPEAKER_03 1:21:07

I mean, not after these Google searches.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:14

Fucking FBI, open up! An extra bone on their bone. Do black people have an extra bone in their bone? And then to say ankle. Oh my god. I'm stoned. Bear with me, Sean Stone! Alright, let's check it out here. No, black people do not have an extra bone in their ankle. That's wrong, dude. All humans, regardless of race, Raymond, are born with the same set of skeletal bones.

SPEAKER_02 1:21:54

Nah man.

SPEAKER_03 1:21:55

You never took you never dissected a black man in science class?

SPEAKER_01 1:22:08

Imagine Miss Frazier that day in school instead of like wheeling out fucking prongs. This is a bunch of black people.

SPEAKER_03 1:22:13

Yo, this is this one's Tyrone. He was a good boy, got shot in the street, so what are you gonna do? Stop reaching for Skittles, pussy.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:21

This is awesome. Science. Holy fuck. You know what's a crazy concept, man? It's the magic school bus. Fucking like this fucking science teacher is like just like showing these students like the most horrendous things inside the human body. Yeah, what's that? Like putting everyone's lives at risk. Miss Frizzle? Miss Frizzle, dude.

SPEAKER_03 1:22:38

Yeah, shout out. Fucking sexy ass redhead. I would have gave her a piece. You would have given her a piece? Yeah, like the extra bone piece. An extra bone. No. I remember that show vaguely. I just remember the episode where they went to the human body. They do that every episode. That's every episode? That's every episode. Oh, damn. I thought it was like I thought there were, isn't there one where they like get small and they're like with bugs and shit? Oh shit, maybe. I thought every episode was different. I just remember one episode where they went to the human body. Maybe they do it every episode, but they go in the human body a lot.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:23:07

They go in there a lot. Yeah. I mean. Hey man, you gotta teach those kids about their penis and vagina.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:15

I I is there I think oh my god. Definitely not. There's definitely a fucking sex ed episode. Fuck it. Magic school bus. There totally is there has to be. I'm Googling it.

SPEAKER_03 1:23:26

You know what I was thinking about recently that I used to learn to use this fucking crazy Jack Material. Jack material? You ever watch to be the girl? That's what Jack Material is. Buddy. You ever watch The Girl Next Door? Oh yeah. Yeah, I used to jack to that show all the time. And I was thinking about it because it's like it's a pretty good movie. And I just remember the whole ending part where like Paul Dano's in it, the whole movie is like the nerd. And then at the end of the movie, you find out he's got a fat fucking cock, and then they use him as the real cock in the video. Yeah. And that I just I don't know why I was thinking about that. I was thinking about Paul Dano's cock. And Tarantino says he's not a good actor. Have you seen his cock, Tarantino, that man can act? Tarantino can't shut up for five minutes to watch a movie, dude. Fucking blabbermouth.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:14

Yeah, don't like Paul Dano. His cock's too big. That's probably why he was dissing him.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:21

Uh yeah, I don't know. Tarantino does come off his tiny dick.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:24

He's got a tiny dick energy. He literally wrote himself into a screenplay to suck on Samahicks, but.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:30

Yeah, I mean, but who wouldn't? I mean, yeah, totally. Like, what are you talking about? Who wouldn't? I would do that now. He did it in like early 2000s, 90s. I would do it now, brother.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:41

Fucking shit, man. God damn, Sound Hag's hot. Sentenical Pandemonium. Fucking, that's her name. The character's name.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:49

Yeah, that's from Dustild Dawn, right?

SPEAKER_01 1:24:51

From Dust Dill Dawn, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:52

I just remember he says the N-word in that movie a lot.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:54

He says the N-word in Night.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:56

Every movie that he's in, of course. I would too if I was writing movies. It's in the script! I have to say it.

SPEAKER_02 1:25:06

Disrespect the script? Well, you don't like art?

SPEAKER_01 1:25:08

You don't like art? Exactly, dude. Exactly. And also, no, there is no fucking magic school bus sex ed episode. Unfortunately.

SPEAKER_03 1:25:19

I mean, how would they run that? It'd be like Miss Frizzle being like, and these are your testes, and this is where the spool. They could have d like a fun animation with the sperm, I guess. That would have been fun. That would have been fun. Yeah, swimming around the kid's balls. Swimming around what's the little nerd kid's name? The red-headed kid's name swimming around his balls. Yeah, no, there's there's an there's a kid in the class too I think that has like red hair and he's like a little dork. Maybe not. They're all dorks. No, no. They're all dorks. No, that little girl's hot as fuck. Bro, that little girl got thangs on her. Speaking as a kid, when I was a kid, I was like, damn. God damn, this little girl got thangs on her. Damn, look at them tangs. Nah, I don't remember that show too much. I've smoked and snorted most of those memories out of my brain.

SPEAKER_01 1:26:09

I'm fucking, I'm literally trying to remember any other magic school bus episode I've ever seen in my entire life. I just remember it's outside of the human body.

SPEAKER_03 1:26:16

I just remember the body one. I feel like they got little. Because the whole thing was the magic school bus can like get small, right? Yeah, yeah. So I think they got small and then they like hung out with like bugs in one of them. That probably makes sense.

SPEAKER_01 1:26:26

I know there's like one where like a kid's fucking sick, and they're like, oh, let's go see what's wrong with like what's his face today? He's sick at home, and they go in there in the magic school bus and they go inside of his body and they they find like all the infections and all this shit. I think the kid had AIDS.

SPEAKER_03 1:26:40

You would know. You would know. Misty pissed Sean. Fucking misty cloudy piss Sean.

SPEAKER_01 1:26:46

I'm about to get myself checked out now. Sean, misty boobia. Fucking what I wanna off topic now. You know what I really want to do? We should we should fucking do streams one day and like play Dungeons and Dragons.

SPEAKER_03 1:27:01

Yeah, I've never played Dungeons and Dragons before, have you? I never have. We need a dungeon master.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:05

I think it'd be the funnest time. I need like a sober dungeon master. You knew he'd be a good dungeon master? I think Caleb would be a good dungeon master. Yeah, but like that's like Shout out Kale Grey.

SPEAKER_03 1:27:13

Yeah, shout out Kale Grey. But do you that's the thing? Do you think Kale Grey's gonna like because you gotta learn all the shit, right? Because you gotta know the story. Because that's the whole thing of the dungeon master kind of leads the story to wherever the character is.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:22

He went out of his way to get ordained to marry my fucking sister. Let's literally go online and type in your name. It's not hard. Anybody can get ordained. He can go out of the way for us to be a dungeon master so we can trip shrooms and play Dungeons and Dragons.

SPEAKER_03 1:27:41

No, no, no, no, I'm not taking shots at Kale here. I'm just saying I don't think it was hard. I think Dungeon Master is like, I'm pretty sure, like, unless you're the if you're not writing your own campaign, you at least have to know the campaign. You know what I mean? Exactly. Because campaigns like in Dungeons Dungeons and Dragons could take like hours, legitimately hours. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:58

And that's why I feel like you know, doing stream. And playing Dungeons and Dragons is just as important as getting married, so he should take it with like the most you know importance and take it seriously as well. Take it just as seriously.

SPEAKER_03 1:28:09

Yeah, put your daughter in the bedroom. Let's get fucked up.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:12

What are you doing, bro? Do shrooms, let's play games. Yeah, why is your kid here? Put her in the cage. Fucking I always wanted to do that, though. I thought it'd be a great idea.

SPEAKER_03 1:28:27

Yeah, that's funny. Uh yeah, I'd be down. I'd be down. That's the thing, though. It's like if we do that, it's like a light dose of mushrooms. Fuck it, seven grand. Like, you can't be doing the heroic dose and being like, let's play Dungeons and Dragons. Not even doing nothing. It's gotta be a light dose. It's funny that you bring that up, like doing mushrooms and doing stuff. So I showed you uh the Almost Friday YouTube channel where they're like they have a podcast, they do sketch comedy, they do lots of stuff. They're really, really funny. Shout out uh almost Friday. Um, but they do they also do like almost like vlog style shit where they did one and they went to one of the most haunted houses in America and they did mushrooms and they and they did a video there, and I was like, dude, that's pretty fucking awesome.

SPEAKER_02 1:29:11

Dude, oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 1:29:14

Okay, so they get to get they have like haunted tours here in Winnipeg, man. Yeah, of like Fort Gary and stuff. Yeah, dude, we should fucking let's fucking do shrooms and do a haunted tour. We can do that. We gotta get like lavalier mic. Yeah, fucking, oh yeah, fucking record that shit and put it on the pod. We're on a fucking haunted tour across Winnipeg. We're just fucking tripping balls. That'd be great. That's a good idea.

SPEAKER_03 1:29:39

Yeah, I fuck with it. I fuck with it. I have so much mushrooms at home. Last time I did mushrooms, I don't know if I told you this. So I did uh it was Erica's birthday, and we went out for dinner. Yeah. And then like with all her friends, it was like literally like 17, 17 girls and one gay dude and me and my son. So I was just chilling there with my son. I was like, I'm not talking to these bitches. Um wait, hold on. Uh yeah, and then uh, and then so we she was like, they're gonna do karaoke after. And I was like, nah, I don't really want to come. I mean, it's just you and your girlfriends. You can go, I'll go home with Andre. So I went home with my son, we hung up for a bit, I put him to bed, and then I put him to bed downstairs, and I went upstairs and I was like, fuck, I'm gonna do a bunch of mushrooms for whatever dumb reason. I thought that was a good idea. So I did a bunch, I did a bunch of mushrooms, and they were so dry and old. There were mushrooms from 2024 or 2025. They're from like when I went to Folk Fest, and I think that was 2024. So they were like a year and a half old, and they were the driest mushrooms ever. So I ate a bunch of them, and like it was like an hour and a half later, and I was like, fuck, I don't really feel anything. So I ate a bunch more mushrooms, and uh, and then when I ate the mushrooms, typical time when you do mushrooms, as soon as I swallowed them, I was like, I'm high as fuck. Shouldn't have taken those mushrooms, I'm already so high. Um, so I was in my room, like trying to like, I'm trying to vibe, I'm trying to chill, but like the whole time in my head, I was like, if my son wakes up right now, I need to go downstairs, and I am so fucked up. So I was getting I was freaking myself out that I just I just turned off the TV and I was laying there in my bed with the baby monitor on my chest, just like laying down, tripping out, and then I would get up and stare at it, make sure he's not awake, and then like trip out and fucking wake up. And it was the worst time of my life that when Erica came home at like 3 a.m., I was like, oh my god, hell yes. And then I watched a couple podcasts and laughed for the rest of the night. But it was probably one of the worst four hours of my trip of my life. It was crazy. After that, I was like, yeah, maybe not do mushrooms unless I'm like chilling with people.

SPEAKER_01 1:31:37

Okay, doing mushrooms by yourself was like a whole different vibe, dude. Like the last time I did mushrooms, I was also by myself, and I was in this fucking room, man, and I was like listening to like tool and whatnot, and I was like, I couldn't fucking deal with it. So then I fucking was like laying in my bed and I was like watching Cell Park and I was like laughing like manically, like manically, and then my mom comes in the room. What are you doing? And all I could see was like her silhouette, like illuminated by the fucking like, you know, the outside hallway light, and it terrified the fuck out of me. I was like, oh no.

SPEAKER_03 1:32:06

Jesus Christ, it's the boogeyman.

SPEAKER_01 1:32:07

It looked fucking menacing as all helping. Fucking man the rest of my trip, I was like in a goddamn like fetal position with the blanket up against my face, watching South Park, fucking trying not to laugh. I was very self-aware that I should not be laughing so loud, and it just ruined my whole vibe.

SPEAKER_03 1:32:23

Yeah, it's so funny. I bet your parents don't feel that way at all when they're banging super loud. You should go in the next time they're banging and be like, What are you not? Hey! What's the hell is noise? Fuck in the fucking room. What's all this noise? Your mom's getting back shots together. Get my fucking revenge.

SPEAKER_02 1:32:41

Fucking tell me what it feels like. Oh, yeah, what to be interrupted.

SPEAKER_03 1:32:47

I thought you were gonna say, tell me what it feels like to be inside mom. No, no. That would have been wild.

SPEAKER_02 1:32:56

Yo, dad, describe it.

SPEAKER_03 1:32:58

What does it mean? That's a bit I mean, to be honest, I think we've been kind of crushing this episode. I hope you don't cut out too much.

SPEAKER_01 1:33:06

I'm definitely fucking not cutting out a lot. We've been crushing it for sure. We've been crushing it. Also, I did leave, I did leave a comment section on Spotify. Oh, yeah. I haven't gotten any fucking comments yet. Like, comment, subscribe. Like, comment, and subscribe, yes. Not sure what this episode is gonna be called yet, but we are the Just Clown in podcast. Yeah, we will, we, we are gonna We might change it.

SPEAKER_03 1:33:28

We will change it. Because I'm not lying, don't love the name, but for now, we are just vibing. I'm gonna go home until the next time we pod, and I'm gonna start seriously thinking about names. I don't know, I've been thinking about like because lots of lots of lots of podcasts will be like um it'll be like uh there's a podcast that let's do called Boys Cast. So like I was thinking of trying to find a name where it's like something cast.

SPEAKER_01 1:33:51

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 1:33:52

But I haven't really got the only thing I thought of so far was Jiz Cast, and I don't think that's good. It seems like it's ripping off Comtown too much, which I don't know if you've ever heard of Comtown. Comecast, it was Comcast, Comcast. That is good, but again, I feel like we're ripping off Comtown because Cometown is like one of the most legendary podcasts ever. They don't do it anymore, but it was Stavros, Halkeist, Nick Mullen, and Adam Friedland, and they were the one one of the first podcasts to have um like a really big Patreon. So I think they were making like a hundred thousand dollars a month just on Patreon. Holy fuck. And they were huge, never did video, only did audio. And then they just stopped doing it one day, yeah. One day, of course, when we get enough listeners for sure. Um, and then we'll start doing like bonus episodes and like on Patreon too. You could do stuff that you can't put on any other content because it's behind a paywall. Yeah. So you could do like crazy shit on there, like you could show your dick an asshole and stuff and shit like that. Yeah, yeah. So there's Oh, I'm gonna get famous! Yeah, exactly. So we can we can jump on there and like do the gay sex stuff on there and whatever. Um like we go, oh, we should do a series on Patreon when we start it up. Is Sean really bi? And then we introduce you slowly and slowly to gayer and gayer things and see when you gay chicken out. I bet you it's gonna be pretty quick. I bet you I'm gonna try to put my dick in your mouth, and you're gonna say, no.

SPEAKER_01 1:35:10

Fucking sorry. Yeah, I don't know, man. Yeah, maybe I'm not bi after all. Literally just thinking about it now, it's like, yeah, I don't know if I'm down for that.

SPEAKER_03 1:35:20

Why? What are you scared? Fucking weirdo.

SPEAKER_01 1:35:24

Scared.

SPEAKER_03 1:35:26

Scared of the dick, bro?

SPEAKER_01 1:35:28

It's a scary thing.

SPEAKER_03 1:35:29

No, it's not, bro. I fucking suck mine all the time.

SPEAKER_01 1:35:32

They're fucking ugly looking things, man.

SPEAKER_03 1:35:34

Bro, you ever fucking never mind? We'll bring that we'll take that to the next part. I don't want to circle back to cum again. Let's put a button on cum. You want to put a button on cum. But I want to tell it so bad. I'm gonna tell it next time. Tell it next time. Um the destruction of the best trilogy ever is about to happen. Can you take a guess?

SPEAKER_01 1:35:53

The destruction of the best trilogy is about to happen.

SPEAKER_03 1:35:56

Yeah, I think they're gonna start filming soon, if not, have already started filming. What Lord of the Rings? Yeah. So they're making a sequel to The Lord of the Rings. Fucking Sneagle, the hunt for Golem. Yeah, which I don't really think is gonna be good for the legacy of the franchise. Like that fl that franchise, the first three, like the three Lord of the Rings movies are arguably the greatest fucking movies of all time. Definitely the greatest trilogy of all time. It's like it's it's it's hard to beat. And then making that fourth movie is gonna be like, okay, so now this is no longer a trilogy. Now this is a quadrilogy or whatever it's called. And the fourth movie I can't see being good because it is Andy Circus directing and like writing. I think Peter Jackson's like producing or something. Like I think he still is in it in some aspects.

SPEAKER_01 1:36:40

Yeah, I think he's like overseeing all of it. But he's not he's not OS. He's like the Kevin Foggy.

SPEAKER_03 1:36:45

You know who's helping write it? Huh? You know who's helping write it? Who? Stephen Colbert.

SPEAKER_01 1:36:50

Well, okay, Stephen Colbert is doing fucking uh he's doing the other one. Uh there's there's uh there's a there's uh a Smeagol movie coming out, and then there's another one, Steven Colbert, that him and his son are writing, that's about like fucking um the death of Frodo, like 14 years after the events of Return of the King, and then Sam, Mary, and Pippin go to the Undying Lands or something. It's about their journey. There's two movies actually coming up. That's horrible.

SPEAKER_03 1:37:18

Both of those sound horrible. They both sound horrible. Those sound horrible to be honest. What the fuck? Fucking um, what's his name? Fucking uh fat Sam looks so different. He looks insanely different. Where like uh fucking Frodo, uh fucking little queer boy Elijah Wood looks exactly the same. Like if they brought Elijah Wood back, I'd be like, okay, that makes sense. The guy that plays Frodo, what the fuck? You tell me this guy died somehow of natural causes?

SPEAKER_01 1:37:44

He looks healthy.

SPEAKER_03 1:37:46

Like, what? He died? Why did the fat one die? Who the fuck's his name, the fat boy?

SPEAKER_01 1:37:51

Okay, um, Sean Aston. Sean Aston, shout out.

SPEAKER_03 1:37:57

Fucking Bob from Shanger Loos. Yeah, like I don't I don't think either of them have the potential to be good. I think they only have the potential to ruin a complete complete legacy of a franchise. Which I mean debatably has already been done with the Hobbit. The Hobbit almost did that. Yeah, I mean, debatably it definitely has been done with that, but like I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 1:38:17

I just really that this new uh it's also fucking being done worse with Rings of Power. Yeah, Rings of Power is pretty bad. That show got cancelled or no, it's digged. Well, these big Amazon spent billions of dollars on Rings of Power, so like they're they're they're contract, they're contractually obligated to make so many ser so many seasons. I mean even if nobody's fucking watching it. Yeah, maybe so Amazon's literally just like fucking like bleeding money.

SPEAKER_03 1:38:46

That's the thing. That's what we like to think, but I bet you Amazon's making more money because like even after the pandemic, how like I don't know about you, but literally almost everything we need for the household item is off from Amazon. Buy it on Amazon. That's very true.

SPEAKER_01 1:39:01

Jimmy Bezos is the richest man in the world.

SPEAKER_03 1:39:02

Where'd we get that audio interface? Fucking Amazon, dude. Exactly. Where did I get these fucking cores, bruh? Exactly. Like it's like everybody's like, yo, Amazon's bleeding money. It's like, no, they're not. You gave Amazon $400 this month. Just you. Imagine everybody else giving them money. Like they're probably they're probably making money hand over fist. Also, I seen the craziest thing the other day that bring up Amazon. So funny. So Amazon, Amazon training for workers and drivers entails this thing where they like put a bunch of weight on them or they make them carry boxes, and then they make them walk over slippery surfaces to train them for walking over ice and stuff, so that when they slip and fall, they can't sue Amazon because they were trained for that. What the fuck? I seen a video, it was going viral the other day, and it was literally like in a warehouse somewhere where this lady had like a big ass backpack on or something, and she's walking over a slippery surface and having to walk over these things. It was absolutely insane. Corpse queef. To be very honest, I'm not listening to any of these episodes. I haven't listened to it. I know, man.

SPEAKER_01 1:40:02

I said to you like, did you send you a link? Did you listen to that?

SPEAKER_03 1:40:05

No, I nah. I sent the link to other people that don't listen to it, but I'm not gonna listen to it. It's so funny. Eric was like, Why aren't you gonna listen to it? I'm like, I recorded it, I did it, I was there. I don't need to listen to it again. I did it, I did all the stuff, I did everything that we we did. It was hell, it was half me.

SPEAKER_01 1:40:22

You also don't like your voice.

SPEAKER_03 1:40:24

No, who likes their own voice? What kind of psychopath likes listening to their own voice and says, Wow, I'm the shit.

SPEAKER_01 1:40:30

Okay, and like I I got used to like listening to my own voice because like you know, I'm like school and whatnot when I when I went to uh you know school. Yeah, I got used to listening to my own, I got used to hearing my own voice, so I'm okay with it now. But at the beginning I was like, I fucking hate this shit.

SPEAKER_03 1:40:48

I sound like a nasally homo, dude. I sound fucking gay as hell. Also, I remember when I was in high school, this uh the librarian in the school. I'll always remember this because I left the library being like that bitch just called me ugly. Um hold on, listen. She I was in the library and I was checking out a book or something. I forget her name, Miss DuPont or something. She was like, I she's she's a librarian, she's a French. I think that's her, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Uh but I was checking out a library book and she's like, Wow, you have such a such a good voice for radio.

SPEAKER_02 1:41:17

And I said, This bitch is called me ugly.

SPEAKER_03 1:41:21

This bitch is saying I should be on radio because I got my voice is good, but I'm ugly. I left it. I remember making that joke and being like, fuck that bitch. Obviously, I didn't take it that way, but uh yeah, no, I hate my voice. It's gay.

SPEAKER_01 1:41:32

Fucking people like some people say I have the voice to radio too, and it's like, fucking, are they calling me ugly too, dude? Like, what the fuck? They are, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:41:40

They they're calling me ugly. Who told you that? Fucking a lot of people. Damn. You got called I only got called ugly by one person. Damn, you got called ugly by everybody. That's fucking crazy. You got the voice to radio. Oh, you fucking bitch. Damn, bitch. Now it's funny because I think it's like uh the joke from or the old joke is that that that boy has a face for radio, which is a joke. That is the joke, yeah. But when I heard that, I was like, damn, this bitch called me ugly. I'm not taking another sip of your beard, dude. Yeah, go for it.

SPEAKER_01 1:42:09

It's the last one, so well, Ray, I know I said it a lot, and I call you know I called you ugly on the first episode, but did you actually I don't even remember?

SPEAKER_03 1:42:19

Oh, yeah, you did. I called you the ugly.

SPEAKER_01 1:42:22

I called you ugly as fuck, man.

SPEAKER_02 1:42:25

Well bug, I guess. You're actually not ugly.

SPEAKER_03 1:42:28

I hope you don't feel that way about yourself. Nah, I mean it depends on the day. I mean, I think everybody's like that though, right? Like it depends on the day. It depends on the day, but like usually I just look I just look in the mirror and I'm like, yeah, that's just my face. But to be honest, for a long time when I was younger, I always thought I was not an attractive person. And then I remember I was like working at a at a at a gas station in our hometown, and this girl I was working with was like, Wow, you probably got laid a lot in high school, hey? And I was like, No, not at all. And she's like, Why? She's like, that was probably your own fault. She's like, You're a good looking guy. I was like, damn. Really? At Clark's corner? Yeah. Yeah. I remember hearing that and being like, I'm kind of kind of good looking. But when I was in high school, I was like, bro, that's that's why. That's why. Like, I mean, like, I mean, probably probably lots of genetics too, but that's why I was like, I gotta be funny, dude. I gotta, I gotta be funny some, I gotta do something because this isn't working. But I think I was just a I'm just a big pussy, that's all it is. Yeah, I mean, maybe, maybe like even like bleep over some names if you want to keep it in. I don't know if you've done any of that yet, because again, I haven't listened to any of the episodes.

SPEAKER_01 1:43:33

I haven't done that yet, no. Yeah, I I did cut out some of that stuff, like yeah, but some of what stuff?

SPEAKER_03 1:43:39

Well, fucking like some fucking talking about my fucking exes and shit. Like, who? Who talked about your exes? That's okay. We can talk about my exes. I had a ex, I had an ex. Her name was shout out if you're listening. Definitely probably not, haven't talked to you or seen you in years. Um, but she used to have stinky puss. Like stink puss. I still eat that shit all the time. All the time I'd be eating that shit.

SPEAKER_01 1:44:00

You said that on the first episode.

SPEAKER_03 1:44:03

Then we know I'm not lying. Then we know I'm not lying.

SPEAKER_02 1:44:08

It's a real thing, dude. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_03 1:44:11

I love that chick so much I would eat her stinky puss on the regular.

SPEAKER_02 1:44:14

Oh my, it actually smelt bad. I mean, it didn't smell good. What was wrong with her pH?

SPEAKER_01 1:44:20

It's fucking vaginosis, bro.

SPEAKER_03 1:44:22

Bacterial vaginosis.

SPEAKER_01 1:44:24

That's real, is it legitimately yeah?

SPEAKER_03 1:44:26

It's when your pH gets and your pussy gets off and it starts stinging like fish. Holy shit. Like you ever like the that that's that's not a joke where it's like, yo, your pussy stinks like fish.

SPEAKER_01 1:44:34

That's a real thing. I've never I've never came across like an actual like distinctive fishy pussy before. Oh, dude. So I always thought it was like just a fucking myth. I was like, what the fuck are people talking about? Nah, dude. Like, never mind.

SPEAKER_03 1:44:48

Don't sit on a chair after my mom. That's all I'm gonna say. Shit, you'll never get that smell out of your jeans. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 1:44:57

So that's a legit thing? Wow. Crazy. Like, what kind of fish?

SPEAKER_02 1:45:05

Like tuners. Like tuna.

SPEAKER_03 1:45:07

Tuners? Fucking classic tuners? Smell like smell like she just opened a fresh fucking can of cat food.

SPEAKER_01 1:45:14

Okay. Fucking Christ. I see. I've never smelled anything like that yet. Cat food? Pussy that smells like cat food.

SPEAKER_03 1:45:23

Oh shit, yeah. That's my specialty, bro. I searched for that shit. I got the nose of a bloodhound, brother. I'm at the club sniffing seats.

SPEAKER_02 1:45:31

Does it taste any different?

SPEAKER_03 1:45:34

I mean, plug your nose, bro. I got you ever see those things that the swimmers used to plug their nose underwater, like little kids in pools. I got a couple of those now. Yeah, exactly, bro. Put that shit on, go swimming. Go with the fishes, bro.

SPEAKER_01 1:45:50

Holy shit.

SPEAKER_03 1:45:50

Yeah, I know. She had stinky puss, though.

SPEAKER_01 1:45:52

Man, fucking when you brought that up like on the fucking very first episode, I thought that was just a fucking joke. Nah. I was like, no way. You fucking had an ex go up and actually smelt bad.

SPEAKER_03 1:46:02

She had a tattoo right in between of her titties, though, and that shit was so hot. I don't know. Oh, see tattoos are fucking hot. But not on her titties, like right in between between the cleaves. That shit got me, got me fricky.

SPEAKER_01 1:46:15

Fucking Christ, man. Did you always used to aim for it? Probably aimed for it a couple times. Nah, I fucking dumped loads on that chick, dude.

SPEAKER_03 1:46:22

I've never not been with a girl and dumped loads. I can tell you son now. And you know what? And you know what? That was after a lot of load dumping. Like, I dodge bullets, dude. I dodge hella bullets. I think I've used seven condoms in my whole life. Like it's no. Even one night stands, I fuck girls without condoms. I'm really risking uh STI here.

SPEAKER_01 1:46:47

I I I'm not gonna lie, I risk it too. Yeah, you feels so much better. You have AIDS. We know that. I don't have misty piss, dude. I have misty pits with it.

SPEAKER_02 1:46:57

We know you I risk it so we know you don't wear condoms with dudes. What kind of dude?

SPEAKER_03 1:47:01

When do dudes wear condoms when they're fucking dudes, anyway? You can't get a dude pregnant from the butt. AIDS, bro. AIDS. AIDS. That's a thing of the past, bro. Take a little bit of prep and you're good. Fucking off they used to call AIDS back in the day? What's that? The the acronym for it was GRID. GRID. GAY-related immunodeficiency disease. Get the fuck off, really! Okay. Yeah, it's crazy. Back to Google. I forget. I forget what AIDS tends for now. I think that's just like autoimmune disease or auto something. But like, yeah, it used to be grid. Gay related auto or immunodeficiency disease or something.

SPEAKER_01 1:47:42

Grid. It's typed in grid. Okay, well that'll be here. Grid AIDS. Grid AIDS.

SPEAKER_03 1:47:52

It's gonna give you a fucking punnet square, dude. It's like a whole fucking diagram of AIDS.

SPEAKER_01 1:48:00

Oh my god. Yeah, dude. Fucking grid.

SPEAKER_03 1:48:03

That's what it says, we're right. Gay-related immune deficiency disease or something?

SPEAKER_01 1:48:06

Yeah, fucking. Oh my god. Wild, eh? Gay related immune deficiency. Immune deficiency, yeah. It was the initial name given to what is now known as AIDS. Yeah. In the early 80s. Isn't that wild?

SPEAKER_03 1:48:18

Isn't that wild? 1981. Walking around like, yo, you got grid?

SPEAKER_01 1:48:22

You're like, I'm not gay? Yeah, that's fucked up, man.

SPEAKER_02 1:48:26

I got AIDS from a curl.

SPEAKER_01 1:48:29

Fucking like, so like, do you ever hear like the theory that fucking like uh AIDS was made in a laboratory to eradicate the homosexual and uh black communities and shit? Hell yeah. Yeah, that's why it was like immediately immediately called the gay disease by the media is because they they already fucking knew about it. Yeah. I mean they made it for the gays, dude. Fucking demonize the gay people.

SPEAKER_03 1:48:49

Didn't work. Wish it did. Wish it did work. Like, what the fuck?

unknown 1:48:54

Wow.

SPEAKER_03 1:48:54

Well, you're a part of the LGBTQ, though. I guess. Plus? Plus? Forgot about the plus? Or there's probably more now. Probably. You're a B. I'm a problem. I might be a B. You're a B, dude. Not a might be, dude. You're a B and you're gonna take some cock. We'll find out. You're gonna take some cock. We'll find out. Take a little bit of cock. What's it gonna hurt? Who's it gonna hurt, to be honest? I mean, it might hurt your butt. It'll hurt me. Just use lube. Spit it on it. Spit on it. Fucking old-fashioned shit, bro. Hit him with that back alley fucking lube.

SPEAKER_01 1:49:22

Oh yeah, dude. Fucking listen to this. Okay, listen to this. Because I typed in magic school bus sex ed episode before that. So it's on the same fucking AI thread. Relation to Magic School Bus Sex Ed. A grid? Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:49:39

Magic School Bus did a grid episode. That'd be wild.

SPEAKER_01 1:49:43

The relation between Grid and the Magic The joke just read itself. That's fucking hilarious. Fucking Now it's like they need to make a fucking AIDS episode now in Magic School, but let's bring it back.

SPEAKER_03 1:50:04

Yeah, I wish I I wish I remember what Miss Frizzle sounded like. I'd try and do an impression and do a bit, but I don't remember.

SPEAKER_01 1:50:11

I don't know either. I don't remember.

SPEAKER_03 1:50:12

I was trying to do a Jerry Seinfeld impression the other day. I don't know if I still can do it.

SPEAKER_01 1:50:16

Yeah, we're definitely not nasally or Jewish enough.

SPEAKER_02 1:50:20

Get off my plane! I need my food! Michael Richards, why are you saying the N-word? That's a pretty good one.

SPEAKER_03 1:50:28

I was doing that with my son the other day. I don't know why. I was like, oh, maybe I'll try a Jerry Seinfeld impression. I think I heard somebody doing it.

SPEAKER_02 1:50:35

I need my coffee.

SPEAKER_01 1:50:37

Okay, I'm not really good at impressions, but I could like fucking like do like the silly voices from like South Park.

SPEAKER_00 1:50:44

Donald J. Trump. His penis is teeny teeny. But his heart is loose. That's pretty good. I'll give it a. I'll give it a B.

SPEAKER_01 1:50:56

Give it a B. Give it to me. Give it a B. Give it to me. B for bisexual.

SPEAKER_00 1:51:04

Decent rating.

SPEAKER_01 1:51:06

Decent rating. I'm puffing on your fucking vape so hard, dude, because I'm like starting to nick the fuck out.

SPEAKER_03 1:51:12

Yeah, that's fine, bro. So I I uh I mean, I don't think Erica's gonna listen to the episode, but I I told I told her I could I mean I did quit. I quit for like three weeks or something. I quit vaping. Yeah. And then I started vaping again, but I haven't really done it in front of Erica, and I've been kind of hiding it. What are you doing? Vaping like it not around her, but like, but like so I've had this vape for like probably a month now because it's been lasting me so long. Well, you had it over here last time. Yeah, but um the other day, uh Erica came in the room. I was taking a nap, or I woke up or something, and my vape was literally laying right beside me in the bed, and I was just like, whatever, dude. Like, what am I what am I gonna do at this point? Shove it under the pillow. I just didn't say anything, and she didn't say anything either, and we haven't spoken about it yet. But in Erica's eyes, I might still be not vaping. No, she might be I mean, not trying to be. You're a secret vapor.

SPEAKER_01 1:52:06

Did she know that you're smoking and whatever occasionally too, or what?

SPEAKER_03 1:52:09

Yeah, I mean, last time I was here, she was or no, I think it was the first time. Yeah, because the last time we did it downstairs, um, the first time I was here when your parents weren't home, we were fucking smoking bogues in here. Yeah, I told Erica about that. I was like, Yeah, Sean was getting going wild last night smoking bogies in the house, and she was like, Did you have some? I was like, Yeah, no shit. What do you mean? Am I a dickhead? Like, what am I just not gonna smoke a cigarette like a cool guy? I wanna be one of the cool guys. Am I a fucking loser, Erica? Jesus Christ. Uh, you know, it's okay. So last on the last episode, I think it was the last one where I was talking about my son and how he sounds like a like a like a Mexican immigrant when he says yes. Yes and he goes, he goes, Yes. Yes. So it's so funny. I've been playing Crimson Desert, and I think maybe he well, he does it like that, but the character in the game, what once you get it and start playing it, the voice actor in the game is so flat sometimes. You'll go to do a mission and he'll be like, Hey, are you the gray man? And he'll be like, Yes. And you can tell they just use the same yes over and over for every cutscene because it's like a like Crimson Desert was originally gonna be an MMO, right? A massive multiplayer online game or whatever. And then they were like, they transitioned, they're like, No, it's a single player game. So you could tell like lots of the voice acting is not good. Yeah, and the main character is just all the time you'll be doing a mission, they'll be like, Oh, hey, are you this guy? And he's like, Yes, yes. You see, like Andre fucking like picked that up from clip. I don't think so because I where I play a game with headphones, and I also never my son never watches me play video games because uh he's he doesn't have the attention span for it yet. Yeah, like unless it's like unless it's like a show that he likes, which is like Spidey and Friends. So they have like a children's Spider-Man show now, which is pretty fucking sick. It's got like Miles Morales, Gwen Stacy in it, but they all have like they all have like different names. So it's it's not it's not Spider-Man, it's Spidey. Oh, okay. And uh Gwen Stacy's name is Ghost Spider. And Ghost Spider. Yeah, and Miles Morales' name is Spin. Because it's just like easier for kids to say, I guess, but it's like Spidey and Friends, it's got Hulk in it, it's got Iron Man in it, like it's got all these characters, and like I was like, I'll definitely let him watch this shit. We let my son watch way too much TV. He watches way too much TV, it's crazy.

SPEAKER_01 1:54:25

They have brain rot, dude.

SPEAKER_03 1:54:26

Yeah, I I've already got him on 10-second TikTok clips. I've been training him, dude. You've been training him for the brain rot again? I'm turning down his attention span to a zero, brother. Like, he's gonna be dumb as fuck.

SPEAKER_01 1:54:38

Oh man, he's gonna join the rest of us. He's gonna be joining the rest of society in no time, dude.

SPEAKER_03 1:54:43

Yeah, no, he he he uh he definitely watches way too much TV, but I cannot wait till he's old enough till he wants to play video games, and then I'll be like, fuck yeah, dude, let's grip some shit.

SPEAKER_01 1:54:52

You're just gonna fucking destroy your kid in Mario Kart.

SPEAKER_03 1:54:55

Yeah, but I think at the beginning I'll probably be like, yo, let's play games that we could just play together.

SPEAKER_01 1:54:59

Yeah, like what?

SPEAKER_03 1:55:00

I don't know, like any like two-player game, like you can play like Mario, like regular Mario, regular Mario, shit like that. Mario Party. Um, any like any of those games, like any of those co-op games, split fiction, it takes two, like any of those games, because those are all pretty PG. Yeah. Um what else? I don't know, to be honest. I'm sure there's a ton more, but it's like at this point, it's like he fucking Sonic man, Sonic the Hedgehog. Ah, fuck Sonic. Sonic's a gay homo.

SPEAKER_02 1:55:28

What Sonic's the shit?

SPEAKER_03 1:55:30

Hate Sonic. You hate Sonic? Hate Sonic might be the worst game of all time.

SPEAKER_01 1:55:33

Dude, are you fucking are you fucking? No, not at all. I literally hate it. Seriously, don't like Sonic.

SPEAKER_03 1:55:37

Mario for Life, brother. Fucking crazy. Mario for life. Sonic sucks balls and cock. What a gay.

SPEAKER_01 1:55:42

You're an elitist. You're a fucking you're you're a fucking Mario elitist. Well, I think we may have to end it right here.

SPEAKER_03 1:55:50

Yeah, Sean's out of gas, dude. Sean's fucking gas, bro.