It’s all about noticing

Welcome to The Mindful Moments Podcast, a space created for those quiet questions that often go unanswered.

Have you ever caught yourself wondering why you feel unsettled when, on the surface, everything seems fine? Or noticed that even with a clear understanding of your patterns, real change still feels just out of reach?

If that resonates, you are exactly where you need to be.

I’m Phiona from Mindful Moments Therapies. As a counsellor, clinical hypnotherapist and somatic therapist, I work with a range of approaches including EFT tapping, IEMT and breathwork. My work supports children, adults, couples and groups, both face to face in Havant and online across the UK.

This podcast is an invitation to explore yourself with curiosity rather than judgement. Together, we will look beneath the surface of thoughts and behaviours, creating space for a deeper understanding. A gentler approach. One that does not just explain your experience, but helps you begin to change it.

Do remember to subscribe so you can stay updated whenever a new episode is released.

You can find more information at www.mindfulmomentstherapies.co.uk. I am also on Instagram, TikTok, Facebook and Pinterest under the name Mindful Moments Therapies.

Wishing you a wonderful month ahead,

Phiona

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Welcome to the Mindful Moments Podcast. Today I'm just going to be talking about mindfulness and our mindset. And if you've ever found yourself thinking, why do I feel like this when there's nothing really wrong? Or how do I understand my patterns, but I still can't seem to change them? And if you ever think either of those, then you're in the right place. I'm Fiona from Mindful Moment Therapies, a counsellor, clinical hypnotherapist, somatic therapist, and I also work with other approaches like EFT tapping, IEMT, which is eye movement, and breathwork. I work with children, adults, couples, and groups, face-to-face, inhabit and online across the UK. And this podcast is a space for you to begin understanding yourself maybe in a different way. Maybe a gentler way. A way that can actually create change. Before we go any further, I just want to say something that might feel really important for you to hear. You're not broken. You're not stuck. You're not patterned. So many of the things you might struggle with, such as anxiety or overwhelm, overthinking, shutting down, people pleasing, feeling too much, not enough, having imposter syndrome, feeling invisible. They're not random. They're patterns that your mind and body have learned over time to survive. Often they were created to protect you. And this is something I see so often in my work. Clients coming to me saying, I just don't understand why I feel like this. Or I know where it comes from. I know the cause, but I just can't change it. And that second part is really, really important. Because understanding is not the same as changing. We can understand lots of things. We can understand that astronauts have just gone around the moon and come back. Could we have changed any part of that? No. Because it's not the same. Understanding and changing are different. You may have spent years reflecting, reading, analysing yourself. You may be really reflective, very self-aware. Yet those feelings are still there. And in truth, they're there for all of us. Therapists and clients. Because they're human. The anxiety still shows up. Maybe the same relationships patterns repeat. Your body still reacts in ways you can't seem to control. And if that's you, I just want you to know that there is nothing wrong with you. It just may mean the part of you that needs support right now isn't just your thinking mind. A lot of traditional approaches focus on talking and thinking. And talking therapy, such as counselling, can be incredibly valuable to be able to share in a space that's non-judgmental and is just there for you. It's incredibly important to be able to say things out loud that you've never said to another living soul. To be able to process that in a space that's just for you is really important. However, many of the patterns we carry, especially if you've experienced trauma or if you're neurodivergent or highly sensitive, they don't live in words. They live in the body, in the nervous system, in the subconscious. So, for example, you might know that you're okay. You're in a safe environment, you're in a sense of safety, but your body may not feel safe. You might know that you're good enough. Something inside just doesn't believe it. You might want to relax, but your system just won't let you or doesn't know how. And this is where a different approach is often needed. In my work, I use something I call the mindful moments method: a gentle, integrative way of working that brings together the mind, the body, the subconscious, the emotions, and the thoughts. And I'm going to share this with you just because it will help you to start making senses of your own experiences. So the first part is to notice. This is where we begin to become aware of what is really going on. Not just the surface level thoughts, it's moving beyond those, moving into the patterns that lay underneath. For example, do you notice that you may go into overthinking when you feel uncertain? Or do you notice that you shut down when things feel too much? Or do you notice that you put other people first, even when it costs you? Or do you notice that boundaries are hard to put in place or to maintain? So this isn't about judging yourself here. It's just about gently becoming aware and noticing. Because you can't change something that you're not aware of. If it sits in that space within you where it's unseen and you're unaware, your sense of self doesn't know yet to change it. That your inner landscape just needs a slight change. The second part is to regulate. This is where things can often begin to shift. Because the change doesn't always happen when you're nervous. When your system is overwhelmed. If your body feels anxious, unsafe, or on edge, your system is already in survival mode. That may be its normal state of being. When your system is in survival mode, in that state it's very hard to think clearly, make decisions or change patterns. So in our work together, we start by helping your body to feel safer. This might be through breath work, through grounding, through EFT tapping, or through somatic practices. And often this is the moment people begin to realize I can actually feel different. The third part is rewire. This is where together we begin to work with the deeper patterns, the subconscious beliefs, the emotional imprints, the things that were learned often a long, long time ago, maybe as far back as childhood. Maybe in your teens or early adolescence. And this is where the approaches I work with, such as hypnotherapy or integral eye movement therapy, really come into support. This work isn't about forcing change, it's about allowing your system to update, to realize I'm not there anymore. I don't need this pattern in the same way. That's the important part, that shift. Because your body remembers, and it will remember like a birthday every year, you will automatically, somatically, your body will begin to react in the way it reacted to remain safe at the time that something happened to it, and your mind, your thinking process, can be blissfully unaware. And someone just might say to you, You seem a bit odd today, you're not your normal self. Maybe you're a bit more short-tempered, just a bit more aggravated, and you don't know why, because nothing recently has happened, and that's because your body is remembering what happened to it, and it is already going through the cycle somatically. So to realize that I'm not there anymore, and you don't need that pattern in the same way is such an important part of the process. The final part is to reconnect. Because healing isn't just about reducing symptoms, it's about coming back to yourself, feeling more at home in who you are, trusting in what you deserve, feeling a sense of safety in your body, feeling more able to connect with yourself, with others, with the world around you. This can be especially important if you're carrying trauma, grief. Whether you're navigating the loss of a person, a pet, or a version of your life you thought you would have. Grief needs space. It needs gentleness. It needs to be felt at your own pace. So when we come back to that original question, why do you feel stuck? Even when life looks okay. It's often because your patterns are still running in the background. You're unaware. Your nervous system doesn't feel safe yet. And the deeper parts of you haven't had the chance to shift. None of that means you failed. It just means your system is doing what it learned to do to survive. And before I finish the podcast today, I'd like to offer you something simple. Just a small moment to begin connecting with yourself. You don't need to do it perfectly. Just see what you notice. So if it feels okay, gently bring your attention to your breath. There's no need to change it or do anything different. Just notice it. Just notice the inhale and the exhale. Now just gently notice your body. Maybe noticing where you feel tension or where you feel a little more at ease. There is no need to fix anything. You're just noticing. And if it feels right for you, you might gently want to place a hand over your heart, maybe your tummy, maybe you're on your arm or your leg. Just an offering of a small sense of contact. A small reminder that you're here. And just take one slightly slower breath in your own time. When you're ready, just bring your attention back. This is where it starts. Not with fixing yourself, but with noticing and creating a little bit of safety. If something in today's episode has resonated with you, you're very welcome to be here. And in future episodes, we'll explore more of these patterns. I'll also guide you through practical tools you can use in your everyday life. And if you feel ready to explore this more deeply, I work with clients one to one in haven't, face to face, or online across the UK. You can find more information in the description and on my website. But for now, take care of yourself, and I'll see you in the next episode.