Faith in the Dots

In today’s episode, you will hear from my dad. A portion of his speech that he gave at my wedding as the father of the bride. In his speech, he talks about having faith in the dots. Trusting that even when the path feels unclear or different than what you planned, that somehow those pieces will come together in a way you never could have orchestrated yourself. Listen to what he has to share!

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Before we jump into today's episode, I just want to give you a quick heads up. This one is a little shorter than usual, but sometimes the shortest episodes carry the messages that sit with you the longest. So even a small window of time, I hope what I'm sharing today meets you right where you are. I'll be right back after a quick break. I want to share something that has genuinely helped us stay on top of life lately, and that's using Monarch for budgeting. If you're anything like us, especially in this season of life, balancing school, work, family, loans, and everything in between, money can feel like one more thing to keep track of. And honestly, it used to stress me out. But Monarch has made it so much easier. It gives you a full picture of your finances in one place, your spending, your saving, your goals. And what I love most is that it's designed for families. You can link your accounts, credit cards, and even investment accounts. You can share it with your partner, stay on the same page, and actually feel in control together. It's not about restricting your life, it's about understanding it and making smarter decisions without feeling overwhelmed. If you want to try it out, you can get 50% off your first year with my link in the show notes. I highly recommend it if you're trying to simplify your finances and just feel a little more organized in your day-to-day life. Now let's get into the episode. This week's episode is something that has stuck with me ever since my wedding day. And honestly, it feels even more meaningful right now. On July 15, 2023, Dave and I got married. And during our wedding, my dad gave a speech that I have carried with me ever since. It's one of those messages that didn't just stay in that moment. It's followed me into every season after. And this week it feels especially relevant. Because as you're listening to this, Dave has officially graduated medical school. We're packing up our moving truck, closing one chapter, and stepping into a completely new one as we move into our new home in South Carolina. It's exciting, it's emotional, and if I'm being honest, it's also really unknown. In his speech, my dad talks about having faith in the dots, trusting that even when the path feels unclear or different than what you planned, that somehow those pieces will come together in a way you never could have orchestrated yourself. And as someone who loves to plan, the unknown has not always come easy to me. Because when you're married to medicine, life doesn't always follow your timeline. Things shift, plans change, you're asked to be flexible in ways you never expected. And right now, in this season, that feeling is very real. I too am trying to remind myself to have faith in the dots. Right now we're moving farther away from family, we're stepping into the unknown, and there are moments where it's easy to question, are we making the right decision? But this reminder to have faith in the dots, to believe that everything is unfolding exactly how it's meant to. It's something I keep coming back to. So if you're in a season where things feel uncertain or not quite how you imagined, this is your reminder. Keep going. Trust it. Even if it doesn't make sense yet. Because one day it will. And with that, here is his message.

SPEAKER_01 3:48

Every wedding is special, of course, but to see your daughter get married is one of those moments. Morgan, our walk down the aisle today was wonderful. It was beautiful. It's a memory I shall cherish forever. You looked absolutely beautiful in your wedding gown. Now I tried to follow the ultimate guide template, the 12 do's and don'ts of the perfect father of the bride speech you can find on the internet. But in the end, I went with my mended heart and wanted to convey a message to the happy couple. I have always enjoyed listening to commencement speeches delivered by notable individuals. I find the messaging, the motivational speeches to be uplifting and provide insight to life at an early age. I thought about Admiral William McRaven's speech If you want to change the world, make your bed. It was given to the University of Texas at Austin class of 2014. However, I found a hard time connecting a wedding to Navy SEAL training. So instead, I went with Steve Jobs. Steve Jobs gave a speech to the Stanford University class of 2005. In that speech, he told three stories. I'm only going to tell you the first one, because it's the one that resonated with me so much. It was about connecting the dots. He told a story of how he dropped out of Reed College because he was tired of taking all the required courses. He gave him the time to take the classes that he wanted to take instead. He called them drop-in classes. Well, one of those drop-in classes he took was a calligraphy class where he learned about serif and sans serif typefaces. In essence, what makes great topography. The class had no practical value to Steve Jobs at the time when he took the class. But ten years later, when he was designing the first Macintosh computer, it was the first computer with beautiful topography. If he had never dropped out of college and dropped in on those dropping courses, the Mac would never have had multiple typefaces or proper spacing. Jobs quipped during the speech, and since Windows just copied the Mac, it's likely that no personal computer would have them. Jobs said it was impossible for him to connect the dots looking forward when he was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later. He said in his speech, again, you can't connect the dots looking forward. You can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something. Your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart, even when it leads you off the well-worn path, and that will make all the difference. The concept of connecting the dots has been one of the most impactful ideas in my professional career since I read that speech over 15 years ago. It's an idea that got me through 11 years working in a startup company. It's taken me 18 years to realize that connecting the dots applies to everything in life: family, friends, and your future. We're just a series of dots. Moments, professional and personal decisions, milestones, life events, successes, and failures. Our lives are the line that connects through the dots. The struggle is it's often impossible to see that line as you place new dots. The complexity of the world just obscures the connections. David and Morgan, while you have experienced dots already together, today is your first dot as husband and wife. Much of your new life together as one requires a terrifying leap of faith, the grounded belief that those dots will connect somehow in some way. And yet, as petrifying as it may be, I'm here to tell you, they always do. Time and again, the dots will connect. So don't worry about which dot to place, where or when. Just always, always have faith in the dots. I don't know what the future holds for you. And I know that 20 years from now, many things will have happened that no one can predict. But whatever happens, wherever you go, your mom and I know you always have each other's love, and you will certainly always have ours.

SPEAKER_00 9:32

And that is my dad. I get emotional every time I hear those words because they remind me of something I so easily forget in the middle of all the chaos and uncertainty. That we're not meant to have it all figured out. The idea of trusting the dots, it sounds simple, but living it out is a completely different story. Especially in a life like this, where so much feels out of your control, where timelines shift, and where you're constantly being asked to step into the unknown. What I'm really trying to hold on to in this season is that just because something feels uncertain doesn't mean it's wrong. It might actually be exactly where you're supposed to be. Right now, we're in the middle of a huge transition. New state, new home, new chapter. And while there's so much excitement, there's also fear and questions and moments where I wish I could just see the whole picture ahead of time. But honestly, maybe that's the point. Maybe we're not supposed to see it all at once. Maybe we're just supposed to take the next step and trust that the rest will come together. So if you're listening to this and you're in a season that feels messy or unclear or different than what you imagined, just know you're not alone in that. Keep going, keep trusting. The dots are connecting, even if you can't see it yet. And if you haven't already, be sure to subscribe, leave a review, and follow along so you never miss an episode. It helps this little community grow in the best way. You can find me on social media at LifeofADR Wife. Until next time, take a breath, pour yourself an ice coffee, and be kind to yourself. I will see you in the next one.