Ep. 3: Memphis Made: Jed on Passing the Torch to His Son

What happens when a former elite athlete becomes the parent of one? This episode on Time Out, Ashley reconnects with her high school classmate Jed — a phenomenal quarterback out of Memphis back in the day — whose son just wrapped up his freshman basketball season as his team's Offensive Player of the Year. As a freshman.

Jed opens up about the unique challenge of being a sports dad when you've BEEN the kid chasing the dream. They dig into the sacrifice, the financial reality, the emotional side of supporting a young athlete, and how being a former quarterback shapes — and sometimes complicates — the way he shows up for his son. He also shares the advice every sports parent needs to hear.

This conversation is for every dad pouring into his kid's dream, and every family trying to figure out how to support a rising star the right way.

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— Ashley

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:01

Welcome to Time Out. And listen, on Time Out, I don't just break down the game. I sit with sports parents who are in the trenches, living this right now, living this life right now. So they can share what they've learned, the mistakes we've made, and the wisdom we've picked up along the way. So y'all don't have to figure it out alone. Today's conversation is extra special because I'm sitting with somebody I go way back with, my high school classmate out of Memphis 10, Big Jed. Now, Jed, y'all need to understand, was a phenomenal quarterback. Okay, back in the day. Um, like we're talking a real deal, and now he's watching his own son step into the spotlight. His son just wrapped up in my, if I'm not mistaken, his freshman year of basketball, and he was the team's offensive player of the year, correct?

SPEAKER_03 0:48

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 0:48

Okay, as a as a freshman. So, y'all, that's really elite. So, we're gonna talk about what it's like to watch your kid carry that athlete torch, the sacrifices he's making as a sports dad, and the wisdom he's picked up along the way. So, Jed, welcome to Time Out. It's been a long, long time over two years.

SPEAKER_00 1:05

Yeah, man.

SPEAKER_01 1:06

Six years. Long time. Introduce yourself.

SPEAKER_00 1:08

Yeah, well, my name's Jed. Um, I've been a part of this sports journey for a long time. I've been I started out playing ball, elementary ball. Um, I played basketball as well, but I went on to play football because I topped out at six foot. I felt like, hey, if I wasn't six, six, six, seven, I wanna go play basketball.

SPEAKER_03 1:25

No point.

SPEAKER_00 1:26

So yeah, so that that's one of the reasons I I left basketball alone, but I was pretty good in basketball too. Um at the same time, I coach the kids as well. I built my own program back in 2015.

unknown 1:37

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 1:38

Uh had over 200 kids in that program. But, you know, uh, that's one of the reasons I got so hands-on with the basketball stuff. So I kind of make it look a little easier when it comes with my son, but it is not easy at all.

SPEAKER_01 1:49

Not at all. Before we get into your son, I have to take us back for a second. Um, because uh the Jet I remember was like lights out under center at our high school. So talk to me about your journey as an athlete and growing up in Memphis.

SPEAKER_00 2:08

Yeah, I mean, if I was my journey, I mean a lot of people know I played football. I almost gave up on football before I got to high school, which was crazy. It took my middle school coach to say, hey man, you have potential in this because back in that time I thought I was gonna be like the the next D. Wade, somebody of that level. I mean, I probably could have.

SPEAKER_03 2:27

You were pretty good.

SPEAKER_00 2:28

Yeah, you know, but uh football was different. The passion I had for it, I didn't have nobody tell me to go put in the work. I did it myself. So I just felt like that was my way out of my situation growing up. Phone.

SPEAKER_01 2:42

No, you good.

SPEAKER_00 2:43

Out, my out, my phone started to read, but here. Hold on, hold up. Okay, everybody wanna call me. You see me now?

SPEAKER_01 2:51

I can't see you.

SPEAKER_00 2:52

My camera froze, hold up. Let me turn it off, turn it on.

SPEAKER_01 2:56

Okay, and you probably you can um log out and rejoin if you need to.

SPEAKER_00 3:00

Okay, yeah, because it froze, though. Hold up. Man, it knocked me way out. All right, we back, we back, we back. All right, so all right, so yeah, I start back right into it. But yeah, I I did the football thing from ninth through twelfth grade. I think I did pretty well. I was all state, um, EA League 11th quarterback. It's some good stuff with the football stuff. So like once I um I wish I had what my son have now as far as the guidance and the people who can actually help him tell him where to go. Because when it came time to uh choose college, I was the last person to figure out where I wanted to go. And uh I tell people all the time, I was so stuck on trying to go to Miami at the time that uh I didn't pay attention to the Delta states. Yeah, I I didn't pay attention to the Delta states. I didn't pay attention to Alabama State. So, you know, I didn't get the proper ACT score that I needed. So I I chose Alabama State. And uh like I tell people I tell kids all the time now, like, listen, don't turn down a school because you feel like you're bigger than the program or you feel like you deserve something better. But like I say, I was I was at that point in my life, I was arrogant. I was an arrogant 17-year-old, 18-year-old kid who felt like I needed to be in the biggest stage possible. Nothing was wrong with Alabama State. Alabama State was great when I got there, other than the weather. Um It was cool. It was cool going to Alabama State. But like I say, it was a last-minute decision that I chose. Uh because that school had been after me like two years. And I called them at the last minute. Yeah, when I didn't get in Miami, I called him at the last minute. I was like, hey, y'all still got that scholarship for me?

SPEAKER_01 4:30

Y'all still gonna put me out?

SPEAKER_00 4:31

It was crazy because, you know, I I I seriously turned down schools that was like calling me every day. I had sudden mists blowing my phone up. And I turned all these schools down. So uh I ended up at Alabama State, and I get down there and like my my first two weeks there, I got hurt working out. That was it. When I got hurt, I had to come back to Memphis to have surgery. So once I had surgery, the doctor was like, Well, you can't lift weights, you can't run for a year. I'm like, how is I'm gonna? That was it for me. You know, because like if I had somebody behind me, that was like, hey man, we'll get you get you together. Take the time, yeah, do what you need to do. It's just a year. Like I say, when you're when you're a kid and you don't have nobody telling you, hey, you need to go this direction, you just make a dumb decision. And that's what happened with me. You know, that's one of the that's one of the decisions I can say that was, you know, I hate I didn't do that at that time, but but that's all it took. I remember going down there, going in the locker room. I was like, hey man, this is gonna be your show in another year or two. And like I say, I got hurt. When I got hurt, that was it. Oh, it was dumb, because it's the same injury that I see people get now, they be good to go in a couple months. So I I really don't know how it happened. But but it happened though. But, you know, from that point on, you know, I told myself, like, I have a kid, he's gonna be good regardless. Like, he's gonna have the structure, he's gonna have the program, he's gonna have everything he needs to get to the next level. You know, unfortunately, my son don't play football. You know, so so that's it's the weirdest thing ever because I tell people a lot, basketball was my true passion. That was my love. You know, so to see COVID do do that, I'd be like, man, he kinda good. You know, I don't know. At this age, he he he nice, but I be like, I don't think he was like me at that stage. You're right, he's better. He he he's really better than me. And uh I like watching him, man. Like watching him grow. He's he's about the same size as me right now, height-wise. He he pushed close to about six one, so that's good at his age. I mean, that's the plan, yeah. But it's a process. So I tell him all the time, like, look, dude, you can't beat me. I don't care how big you get.

SPEAKER_01 6:38

Let's knock that out right now. Bible can't wait on you.

SPEAKER_00 6:43

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm like, listen, man, you you know, we did one-on-one on Facebook live a couple years ago. I ended up pulling my hamstring. I pulled my hamstring, everybody would die and laugh. You know, I I think I had the most views I ever had. People was dying laugh. I said, listen, man, wait till I get in bell shape. You know, even like now, he like, you can't beat me running. I'm knowing, like, I'm a hoop in my head. You won't ever be able to beat me, bro. I don't care how big or you get, but he he nice. He's nice. He's nice.

SPEAKER_01 7:10

That's what's up, man. I appreciate you sharing that context because I feel like shh now as we're entering 40 or nearly 40, yeah, that context of like high school and where we went is like a blur. So for to hear your backstory and know that like shit, I left, I went to McNeese and played and then moved to New Orleans. You went for a year, some time, end up getting hurt and was back home, like to know your path and like how it has really shaped how you enter this sports world with your kid is like amazing. So let's get into the part nobody sees on those highlight reels. Sacrifice, and I want to save some time because that's the one people, the one thing people miss, you know, like underestimate the most. So give us a real look at what a week in your household could look like. And just from me following you for years on social media, I know that you're like traveling all over. So you you co-parent well, you have twins too. So like how that play in the mix.

SPEAKER_00 8:14

Man, it's tough. You know, I can I can speak about this week actually. So, I mean, we'll do spring break. A spring break, we just got off the break, of course. So a normal day for COVID, Monday, you know, he gotta get shots up. You know, uh he gets trained and conditioning. That's on Monday. Tuesday, he works on skill training. Then, you know, so it's the same thing like every other day. And it's a process that don't stop. You know, so I give him maybe Friday off or a day off, but then I be thinking, like, man, this kid's doing tour days. And I'm trying to prepare him for tour days, you know, because you know, one of the things his coach was like, hey, I need to, he needs to put more weight on. I mean, not weight, but just get a little more strong. My kid, the kind of person, hey, they sell the, they sell the shirts with pads on. Just just give me the shirts.

SPEAKER_01 8:56

Right.

SPEAKER_00 9:03

But it's it's it's a lot of work. Even, you know, uh, even when we was just doing the AAU stuff before he got into high school, man. Like, I used to build his basketball schedule around my work. Not build my work around him, but I used to build around his stuff.

SPEAKER_03 9:17

Period.

SPEAKER_00 9:18

If if if I gotta go to Dallas, Texas, I'm gonna find a tournament for my team to play in in Dallas, Texas, you know, that week or that weekend.

SPEAKER_01 9:25

You know, so um, Justin Elite with this thing. I'm so happy to have you on keeping up.

SPEAKER_00 9:31

Man, it's it's it's a lot, man. You know, we from going to Nashville, Dallas, Vegas, all these different places. So I'm able to work at the same time. So I go, I go do what I need to do, and then I go coach my team. You know, so I I've been doing that for years. You know, so if people see me hop on the plane, that means Kobe on his way. You know, so that that's that's been 99% of the time. So I build around his schedule, you know, and his schedule's way more than mine because at the same time, him being a decent basketball player, he's a great student at school. You know, so and and I tell people a lot, that's one of the most important things for me is to see people say, hey man, he's a great kid. I I be like, man, I I I loved it. I love to hear that. But at home, you know, he he liked to check me and, you know, do all that stuff. And but I'd be like, bro, I would really hurt your feelings if I give you a chance to get away.

SPEAKER_01 10:20

Look, if we really was going there, look.

SPEAKER_00 10:24

Like, calm down, buddy. Great kid, always been an understudent. Man, I haven't had no issues on that type of level of schools. We able to put in the extra basketball work. I I said a lot. It's really, it's really no days off. Even though I give them a day off, it's like you did this yesterday. You did two, three things you worked on yesterday where you could have spread it out to tomorrow.

SPEAKER_03 10:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 10:44

You you have to put the time in and by me coaching kids as well. I get parents a lot, they'd be like, just this season, we knew, we knew out here where we at. We're in the DC area. We live in Ashton VA, which is the sub-burries of Washington, D.C. Yeah. They'd be like, man, how he how he get so good? And I'm like, man, he's been doing travel balls in second grade. What? You know, he's been training.

SPEAKER_01 11:04

Oh, look, my son is on the uh, they just asked him to come play like the uh for pro skills out here. We moved to Dallas. Okay. My daughter, she was offered to come to prep school out here. So we moved.

SPEAKER_00 11:14

Yeah, I I followed that.

SPEAKER_01 11:16

So, okay, so the boy's situation is so much different than a girl. It's real deal, no joke. So we need to I guess we need to bite that because we was like, we got time, at least around six, but let him get it, get out there early. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 11:29

Yeah, throw them, throw him, throw him out there early. And what I did, I threw him out there when he was in the second, I put him on a third grade team.

SPEAKER_01 11:35

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 11:35

So, you know, he was getting pushed around and you know, he he fell down a few times, but I knew what I was doing. The plan was the whole time was when you get to high school.

SPEAKER_03 11:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 11:44

You know, you'll be prepared. And and everybody knows Kobe have always played up. It used to be funny, because like I say, when I was coaching him when he was younger, I used to have some other coaches like trying to recruit him, not knowing that was my kid.

SPEAKER_03 11:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 11:56

Because because I never coached him like he was my son. I always I always coached the team as a team. You know, if he's doing something terrible, he looked bad, go get on the bench. I don't I didn't I never play those games.

SPEAKER_01 12:06

Husband, yeah, go sit down. He was her coach.

SPEAKER_00 12:08

You got to, because you have to be prepared to be coached by somebody else. Yeah. You know, and I come from a family of coaches and ball players and stuff like that. So it's like, if you can survive my coaching, you can survive anywhere.

SPEAKER_03 12:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:20

You know, so like for me, uh to see the growth and see where he's at now, I'm I'm proud, man. Like moving out here and he go, first he got to leave all his friends back home. Yeah. Where he was a popular kid, you know, where everybody knew him, from a school where everybody knew him to a new place where he got to start out. So to come in and be a starter and be the office player of the year, like I'm I'm I'm proud, bro. They let me know.

SPEAKER_01 12:45

Like chess out, like And that's how it was.

SPEAKER_00 12:48

It's crazy because I I recorded the banquet, but I didn't know he was getting the award. So when they call us now, I was like, oh shit. And he's he's so mild-mannered and a humble kid. He he just shrugs it off like go on to the next day because awards never meant much to him.

SPEAKER_03 13:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:09

But I never let him see it that way, if that makes sense. He always been built like you gotta keep keep going, you gotta keep working. And working with a teenager, my God, man, these teenagers, like they different. You know, um that's why I say like I think a lot, yes. Yeah, you know, so it's the working out, the schoolwork or the social life that they have to have. Like he's a gamer, he likes to play the video games all the time. I hate the video. Like I play the video, I play Matt still to this day. But he he do the roadblock and and Fortnite and Uh-huh, the sound like my house.

unknown 13:42

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_00 13:42

I I hate it. But because I be looking at him like, bro, if you could spend that much time dribbling the ball, go go in the garage, work on your crossover, you know. Because this is what I tell him. Give me your pros and cons of what you need to work on. Like, I know what you need, but I want you to tell me from your perspective what you think you need to improve on.

SPEAKER_03 14:02

Right.

SPEAKER_00 14:02

And he says, uh, ball hammer. I'm thinking like nothing, I'm thinking to myself like nothing wrong with the ball handling. But if that's what he thinks.

SPEAKER_01 14:10

Right.

SPEAKER_00 14:11

So if if you putting in on your all day, you putting in 14, 15 hours playing a video game. I say Kobe 24 hours in a day, right?

SPEAKER_03 14:19

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_00 14:19

Just go in the garage. What? Like sometimes he'd be like, hey, take me to, you know, go do some open runs and stuff like that.

SPEAKER_01 14:25

Oh, that's good. That's good.

SPEAKER_00 14:27

I go get in the car immediately and take him right away. Because, you know, us growing up, we had the community center, we had those different things like that. These kids these days don't have that. And like I say, where we live at, I never, I didn't even notice before we moved out here. But it's it's like the uh the wealthiest county in the country, right? So you don't have those hungry kids out here.

SPEAKER_01 14:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:49

But we have that mentality.

SPEAKER_01 14:51

Right, right, right, right.

SPEAKER_00 14:52

You know, but these kids don't. So I I tell you, I'm like, listen, Cole, your teammates, man, they they folks own this and they already paid for college and they done all these great things that we haven't done yet. And I I make sure I tell my kid this as well. I'm not paying because you go to college.

SPEAKER_03 15:08

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 15:08

I don't I don't care how you gotta figure it out, yeah, but I'm not paying for it for the simple reason you're you're a hell of a student and you're a hell of a ball player. So whether you go Ivy Lee, whether you go SEC, there's a path that you created yourself. I just give you the tools. You know, but you put the work in it.

SPEAKER_01 15:26

That's right. That's my return on investment. You getting free school.

SPEAKER_00 15:29

That's it. Man, listen, that that's it. Because, you know, like I say, I tell them this a lot. You don't want to get older, you get in your 20s and your 30s, and you owe loans on school. You you don't want to do that. I said, now whether you reach your goal, you know, you say NBA. Okay. Anything can anything is possible, you know, but it's a lot of ways that you can make money because you are more than a ball player, you know. So if that if that's the route you're gonna take, I said, listen, man, they signed NBA checks now million dollars. I said, it's crazy. I said, by the time you get out that way, it's gonna be a half-half a billion.

SPEAKER_03 16:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 16:02

So I'm like, listen, you can change your complete whole family infrastructure. You can change it all by dribbling a basketball. So all the work that we can put in, the thousands of hours, you know, you know, the early morning workouts of the nutrition plans to make sure he's eating the right stuff, making sure he's growing. Man, we the other day, he goes to a stretch place where they stretch his body out, you know, because I want to make sure he gets every inch that he can possibly get with his body.

SPEAKER_01 16:27

Yes, recovery.

SPEAKER_00 16:29

Recovery, everything. We got recovery boots at home for his legs. Yeah. You know, because you you have to recover as well. These things that we didn't know about when we was coming up.

SPEAKER_03 16:38

Right. We just hurt.

SPEAKER_00 16:39

Exactly. So he, you know, what I used to hurt what I used to hurt, when I when my knee or leg was hurting, it was nothing I could do about it. I was at school the next day lifting. But but no, he. Yeah, that was them days. But like now, he got everything he needs for recovery. So make sure he's feeling his body the proper way. And his I I when I when I say I monitor his body, I pay attention to his body. Like today, I was like, damn, I think he got a little taller on me. Oh, but I don't say it to him because he he think he thinks he's a tough guy towards me. You know, if uh I'd be like, I seen him the other day, uh, it's just like when his mom came in town a couple weeks back and surprised him. Her guy came in town with her.

SPEAKER_01 17:19

He was like, man, black families exist, okay?

SPEAKER_00 17:24

Oh yeah, hey, one thing I can say, man, I can shout his mama out. Um his mama's been great as far as, you know, making sure he he, you know, shey, how much that cost? Making sure she helping do certain stuff like that. Because she wasn't an athlete. She didn't understand the process. Man, she she have no clue. You know, I was here, I was here like a almost a year before Kobe came. Because I was I was originally going to let him finish his eighth grade year uh back in Memphis. He was going to Carrieville.

SPEAKER_03 17:56

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 17:56

But they got into their basketball season out there. They had a new coach. He didn't like the coach. Just just being him. Kobe just being Kobe. Well, um, the coach they had was, you know, I don't talk crazy about guys, nothing like that, but he wasn't a a decent, he wasn't a good kid.

SPEAKER_03 18:11

He was a good kid.

SPEAKER_00 18:12

Yeah, he he wasn't the right guy for that kid. So what happened was he made Kobe started losing his love for the game. So I'm like, oh no, that's the real deal, though.

SPEAKER_01 18:25

Yeah, I'm telling you.

SPEAKER_00 18:26

That's way, I'm way out here. I'm like, even though I was going back and forth going home, but I was out here, so I'm like, he's not getting the extra work he needs. But I had it set up to where, you know, his mama can take him to work out here and do stuff like that, but I'm not there.

SPEAKER_03 18:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:40

So he wasn't putting that extra work in. You know, so I look up and I'll be like, hey, you got training today, right? And he was like, I ain't gonna go. I ain't I ain't gonna go. I ain't gonna do this. I'm like, damn. I said, so what's going on? So he called me crying one day. And he was like, man, that coach, man, what do I do wrong? What I do wrong, and this and this. And I said, man, I gotta get this kid here because the coach is killing his confidence big time.

SPEAKER_03 19:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 19:05

Me and his mama finally came up with an agreement, you know, he finally can come on here. So we get him, I get him here, uh, which was September, uh, what's this, September 2024, he got here. And I was like, man, I felt like I had to start from scratch. So all the hard work we put in for years over them just look three months of me being here, it kind of like went away. He kind of lost his love. So helping the kid find that passion and love again, that's tough.

SPEAKER_01 19:29

It's a lot of mental work. Listen, we literally were just there a few months ago. Cass had been playing in high school under her dad. He, the level in the gym all the time. Listen, and we get out here to prep school, they practice two times a day. Yeah, it's just not the same amount of work to the intensity that Cass was used to. So we see the game, her gang suffering a little bit, like going on, dad flying in and out. He was like, wait a minute, we gotta set something up. And it literally, and like even now, like we're preparing her for the summer, she's hitting that track again. She like, ooh, I'm starting to feel like myself because of the type of work she was putting in. And then we weren't even able to get in the gym, like we had just moved out here. You know, Faith, I can I can edit that out, but Faye Family was like, you know, they in a gym two times a day. We like that's just not what she used to. Like you going over your your sets and all of that, that's standing still. Then you, you know, you're doing your uh your individual workout in the beginning of the day, and that's just not the level of intensity. It's three, four people guard that she's working with cash, used to get it in, training by herself.

SPEAKER_00 20:39

And it it takes so much of your day. It takes so much of your day, because even like now, right? I did something that people normally don't do. First off, we still knew here. Yeah, I'm known on the basketball scene back home. Cool. But here I'm a nobody. They have to know who I am. So I gotta set my name, you know, get in the right circle. So I made him try out for six teams, you know, shoe teams or whatever, local teams. He made every team he tried out for. I even had some of them were like, hey man, we heard you was a coach, man. You want to come on board and coach? The whole time I was just sitting back thinking, like, I'm trying to see if my kid is gonna make the right decision. As far as like which team is helped him develop more. Like, that's what I want him to be able to tell. So in the process of him doing that, his high school, his coach from the school was like, hey, I got my own organization and I really want to work with him this summer. I'm like, damn. Because for me, I didn't really want that. I wanted him to go away and work, meaning that we'll come back from school, start with summer league, and y'all see a new person. But that's that's not the case. So one of the things I hey, it was a Nike program. I hate I had to turn him down because I wanted him to do, I mean, I didn't really care about him doing EYBL this year. I wanted him to do it next year. Like, I'm still trying to put weight on his body, making sure his body's growing the way it's supposed to. So he was like, hey, he said, Dad, coach, coach text me. I think I'ma just roll with them. Okay, we roll with them. That's cool. All right. They don't work like we work. I can't do that once a week practice. No, no, no, no, no. Because what I'm used to is the grind. So my kid is used to the grind. You know, so but once one a day y'all practice, or y'all practice on Saturday. Now I gotta rearrange the skill workout because y'all just told us on Friday y'all working out on Saturday. You know, it's like easy. I'm like, man, I I man, look, I be having that man's stuff decked out. Every month I put a calendar on his wall. Today, I know I did a calendar last night. Today I know he got practice at 6:30. From 630 to 8. Cool. Tuesday, no practice. So he got strength conditioning. He got to get his shots up. So he he got to get 2,000 shots up every week. I don't give a damn what's going on. 2,000 shots. That's a must. So I said, okay, so I have to bill around with the coaches. I know. So no, and and and another thing, man, you have like I said, you have the parents out here, like, man, you know, how he get that way. And I'm like, man, y'all don't want to put the work in. Y'all gonna break the spring. And the money. And the money. I spent a lot of money. Money and time.

SPEAKER_01 23:07

Listen, I was just about to ask you. That was my next segment question. But since you already went there, go ahead. Because I had a family I talked to yesterday that spent said they easily spend about 20 to 30K on their babies between because she tried she does EYBL between her travel and recovery and nutrition and listen flights. All the things. Go ahead and talk about the money.

SPEAKER_00 23:29

I I can't even put a number on it. I just know I've been doing it for I I think if I put a number on it, I might make myself mad. But but yeah, flights, driving. You know, we're talking about games, we're talking about hotels, we're talking about personal trainers, we talking about nutrition. We talk we talking about, yeah, even uniform. We're talking about shoes. We're talking about even, you know, the stretch labs and stretch zones he go to. Man, I can keep going. Cameras just to record, like just so much stuff that you can do. We watch a lot of film, so I make sure everything we got is like top-notch art, 4K cameras, all this type of stuff. So that talks money.

SPEAKER_01 24:08

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 24:09

So yeah, it's it's it's it's a lot. I told I told the moment the other day because she uh he was like, he was like, dad, I want to start back against stretched every week. At first we were just doing like once, you know, a month. But before we moved her, he used to go three days a week and get stretched out.

SPEAKER_03 24:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:24

Yeah. I used to make him go three days, three days a week, right there in Memphis. Three days a week. And that's a bill. That's a bill.

SPEAKER_03 24:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:31

Other day I I I was just doing, so I said, okay, his strength conditioning costs disabout. The summer league team, you know, they ain't really want to charge us, but I was like, listen, man, if we knew I paid just like the rest of the other parents. That was money. Personal training. Even even though I I trained him on the side myself, I still I like him to get training from other guys. Right. You know, so so being in this area of DC, man, they have great guards. And uh he trained with a guy here that's that's great. He does a great job with Coba. I love it. I love it. Because he he don't slack out with him. He be on him tough like I do.

SPEAKER_03 25:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 25:03

So, you know, so uh it's a price, it's a lot of money, man. Man, it's it's a grind.

SPEAKER_01 25:10

It's a real grind, it's an investment. And honestly and truly, like I tell my daughter, and I'm telling my son, he's only eight, but I'm like, you can I especially with the way that sports are going now, you build your name, your brand. You don't have to be a five-star. You don't have to be a donor all-American, baby. You can pitch yourself the brands and listen, be doing all kinds of stuff. The landscape is so different now that you don't even, you don't need to be like, yeah, you're gonna finish your degree, but absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 25:40

You can just be okay and you can look like you could look like the the greatest player to ever play the game because of the camera work that people do. You know, so you you just have to do it. You know, one of the proudest moments I'm gonna say from this past season, I never had to get him ready for practice. This is the first time in his basketball life that he'll hey, I'm gonna be late. Let's go. He did that the entire season. When I say I text him up, I was like, you ain't gonna believe this, man.

SPEAKER_01 26:11

Listen, he is unable.

SPEAKER_00 26:14

I said he understands now because it was it was times where I'm telling him, like, like I said before he moved up here, I used to be like, man, I did all this stuff. Nothing. I'm like, what is what are we doing? And he gets here and he, you know, he texts, you know, he texting my mom, he texting my sister, you know, before my sister passed away. And he he asked and all this, like, you know, my daddy, hey, I think he's mad at me, you don't want to work, I don't want to do this. And now it's to the point where he's waking me up before he can go to practice. So he don't want to be late. He was never late. He was 15 minutes early to practice every time he had practice. And I told him, I was like, look, you're you're a kid on the outside looking in. All these people been here, they grew up playing in the coach little AU system. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 26:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 26:54

For you to come here and do what you're doing, bro. I said, I'm proud of you. You know, so keep doing it. So I said, if I'm doing something too too wrong, or or you feel like I'm turning the pressure up too much, let me know. Because I want to make sure you're comfortable at this. But like I tell them, you gotta be uncomfortable to succeed.

SPEAKER_03 27:10

Yeah, good.

SPEAKER_00 27:11

You're gonna run into this stuff. You you can't just man, look, you you can't just cruise through this. You know, like you're gonna run into stuff, you're gonna you're gonna run into issues. You gotta be able to get over those hurdles. That's that's the main thing with this life that we do. Uh like I said, I I love it, man. But I is it's been it was times before, before we got to this appreciating the work that I'm putting in with them. You know, so I'm like, man, I now I I got old players that'll call me and be like, hey Coach, how can I how can I get my shot better? How can I move my feet faster? And my own kid was asking me those questions. So I'm like, this might got somebody in the house that do it with him. He don't appreciate that. But now I can say that he understands. And and that's one of the most proud moments.

SPEAKER_01 27:55

Mm-hmm. That's your for real for real. Because it was kind of where we've had conversations with Cavs, like, listen, you number two in the state, you know, behind uh Caroline Brady, who is 6'5, big girl. Do you really want this? Like, are we doing too much? You know, because we pay basically pushing you to, I'm in her room right now, like pushing you to what's up on your vision board.

SPEAKER_02 28:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 28:22

If you're doing too much, let me know. So we can step back and let you choose the path that, you know, but you gotta put the work in, like getting through adversity. That's what I would we would always hear, like, that's just really preparing you for life because ain't shit out here sweet. Times when you ain't gonna feel like getting up to do it. Um, and you still gonna have to. So I said, you either choose your heart. Like, if you want to make this basketball thing a lifestyle, like get up and do basketball anyway. That's better than getting up to log in on a computer and work for somebody you don't reach out. So I'm like, Reach, put the work in, man.

SPEAKER_00 28:56

Yeah, it I like I said, I tell my kid, I said, bruh, I know I'd probably make work look easy because the type of work I do for a living. I said, bruh, the life I do, I provide a great life for you, bro.

SPEAKER_03 29:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:06

I said, but even that's not easy because I'm in a field where it's not many of us. So I was like, they see me, they they see like, you know, a trendy hip-hop guy and all this other stuff like that. I'm like, bruh, don't fuck with me. But I don't, I I tell him, you don't want to have to deal with it. I said, so use the talent that you have to separate yourself from that. I said, just get there. I said, now I'm gonna I'm gonna make sure I be the battery pack to get you to where you're gonna go.

SPEAKER_03 29:34

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 29:35

You have to get there and do it yourself. You know, so well, like I said, I'm I'm proud of, I'm proud of the kid, man. And I feel like we just barely touching the surface right now.

SPEAKER_03 29:47

So just get started. Just get it.

SPEAKER_00 29:49

It's gonna be tough. And I was thinking like, damn, man, this man 10th grade, I mean ninth grade. I'm like, damn, he's gonna be out of high school soon because it it goes fast.

SPEAKER_01 29:57

Let me tell you, it does. Like Kath was just a freshman. And now it's your last summer, AAU. So we letting all the boys come. You know, we like y'all coming to Phoenix, y'all coming to Chicago. Seeing your sister play AAU. It goes so fast, and it seems like, you know, we were just getting started. I can't even put it any other way. And I'm I know her presence is gonna be deeply missed. I'm already missing her, and she ain't even gone. But this year she was gone a lot. So I said, this is kind of preparing us for school. The girl was in Hawaii, she went to Bahamas to play. She just living. New York, like, I'm like, okay.

SPEAKER_00 30:35

It comes fast because hell, I I cried I cried at the Eddis Down middle school graduation. You know, so it's like you know, yeah, you know, I had my shades on, but I was crying. I'm like, you know, I'm like, dang, man, like, we really here, you know, you know, you know, but I'm I'm like I said, I'm proud. I've been hands- and when I say hands-on, I've been hands-on the entire time. And to to see his development, uh I can't be more proud than what I am of the kids. You know, so I'm I'm looking forward to what's next for him. Uh, I know I'd had a I already had a few schools, other schools, like, hey, you know, I don't I don't think the composition you guys playing could get him to where he needs to be. And I'm like, bruh, I just moved away from Memphis, dog.

SPEAKER_01 31:19

It's coming. It's all here. Listen, that is a totally different ballgame. When everybody, it's like, I just gotta make sure I'm making the best decision for them, helping them navigate that. Because that's a different, a different ball game.

SPEAKER_00 31:33

That's what it's mental. Even with your daughter, sometimes, you know, you you be like, damn, I gotta make sure she's good. How how you feeling? You know, what's on your mind, type stuff. Cause like I say, these kids, they go through way more than what we went through coming up. You know, I I feel like we had more fun in our era. Yeah. These kids, not so much. It's it's different. And the pressure of social media, the pressure of being good, and the pressure from your parents. It's it's a lot. It's it's a lot. So I understand. So I take a step back and be like, okay, I see what he's dealing with. You know, you want to go see your mama, cool. You know, you want you want to go see granny or whatever. Let me know. Whatever I can help you with. Because the mental is it's a big part of it, man. So gotta gotta stay on point, make sure they understand that.

SPEAKER_01 32:17

Yep, absolutely, Jade. Look, I got cass. She's dealing with um edge sports right now, sports psychology, just because she just lost her grandmother.

SPEAKER_00 32:27

Tough.

SPEAKER_01 32:28

And she did a big transition here to Dallas. Again, the the car is like a Mitchell. Fun, cultured, and good. Everybody knows what I mean. And she came to Dallas, Faye family, they don't have no culture. You don't even want to know. Um, so it was like a complete culture shift. Her dad, not her coach no more. So all of that, you know, now you gotta make a name for yourself in Texas, and you just number two. So you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 32:56

All of that it's a different grind. You you gotta prove it, you gotta prove yourself. Whoa. And uh, I I know I know a guy that played for the the the boys team. He'll freshman to a young kid, but but that's that's a good program, man. But it's like, as a for the kids, man, it's it's a lot. They gotta just push through, you know, and know that, hey, we doing everything for a reason. Like, we not just doing something. Like everything we doing is for something.

SPEAKER_03 33:18

Trying to set you up, yep.

SPEAKER_00 33:19

Trying to set you up. I I want to kick my feet up. I want to be at these games, sitting on the front row.

SPEAKER_03 33:24

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 33:25

I want I want to do these things. Like, this was the first time in history I was just the proud dad. Because I'm so used to coaching, coaching, coaching. I'm like, man, it's pretty cool sitting in the bleaches and watching people call your kid's name and cheer and you know, seeing girls go crazy.

SPEAKER_01 33:42

You get to be a real parent. You and Carl had so much in common on that end. He was like, man, I just get to sit back and watch the game. You know what I'm saying? He never had that experience. He coached the AAU high school, even down to Biddy. Like he was her coach. So it was time for her to break away from him. Um And that's tough.

SPEAKER_00 33:59

That's that's that's tough as well, but I'm sure he had her prepared for another coach.

SPEAKER_03 34:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:04

And and like I say, as a parent and as a coach, that's the best thing you can do. Have your kid ready for the next, for the next coach. Because you you want them to be able to be coachable no matter where they go.

SPEAKER_03 34:15

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 34:16

And I always tell my kid, like, don't you ever in history blame a coach for nothing. You know, so if you feel like you're not getting something you deserve, let's work on it.

SPEAKER_03 34:24

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 34:24

Let's work on it. You know, he he went through a slump, probably like after they seven games. Um other team, you know, every team you watch film, they start realizing they got a new kid over at Riverside. Like, who is this guy?

SPEAKER_01 34:37

One is killer.

SPEAKER_00 34:39

He got boxer one. He got boxed on one one game. I say Cole, like six foot. And uh they put a kid on like six five. So he was stuck on COVID like everywhere COVID went. He couldn't breathe. And he like, man, you know, my my Sean ain't following. No, no, no, no, no. That ain't the problem.

SPEAKER_03 34:59

Yeah, yeah. Like, look, listen.

SPEAKER_00 35:01

That's not the problem. The problem is that you don't want to take that challenge. You faster than them. So take the challenge. So I said, now since people got fam on you, everybody's going to play you that way. They're not gonna leave you open for threes, Kobe. They got that. I said, so Yeah, people pray. I said, so you got me, bruh. You can if you can run up against me and hit me and all that, like, you alright. Because none of them is gonna be bigger than me, bruh. So I'm like, listen, or stronger. So if you can do these things against me, you can do it against them. It was a lesson learned, you know. He he ended, he came back the next game, had 19 points and like seven assists, and you know. He one of them kids that do everything on the board. You know, so I'm like, man, this man really, he still don't know how good he could be. He has no clue. And and I I said maybe that's a gift and a curse, you know. Because maybe if if he knew, he probably uh get a little cocky. He not that type of kid at all. But I'm like, this man really could do like a triple-double every game. Like e even if it's 11 points, he can get he can get you 10 rebounds, he can get you 10 assists. That's a fact. So I'm like, man, what what the hell is I'm creating? Yeah. A real deal. You know, I I I say it all the time. I'm like, man, look, I have I have watched so much basketball over the years. I have watched my kid developing. The main reason I even built the AAU team back in 2015, because we we go to a Mike Miller team at the time, and I realized, like, man, this just a system. Meaning that they you just paying to play for this team, and they not really developing the kids.

SPEAKER_03 36:37

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_00 36:38

So I said, so this is what I do. I build a team and I take the kids that they don't play. And then we'll come back and play them in a couple years. So I did it. We beat them. We beat them. So that's when I knew I was doing the right thing. And uh and a lot of the kids that came out of my program, they they are starters in high school. I think the oldest kids are 11th grade right now. So it'll be it'll be great once they hit their senior year next year to see where some of these guys will go. Um like I say, man, I I have done a lot with the basketball program. I'm happy for these kids, I'm happy for my son. But for people to think they're gonna get this type of success by just, you know, working up, I mean, waking up and going to school or going to sch first thing, no high school coach can prepare you for what we're trying to do.

SPEAKER_03 37:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:25

It takes more than going to practice from school. It takes way more than that. If if a parent feels like my son goes to practice, he never missed practice. Okay, that's all y'all do?

SPEAKER_03 37:34

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_00 37:35

I said, that's unheard of from where I'm from.

SPEAKER_03 37:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:38

I said, y'all asked these questions about how my kid is shooting the way he's shooting. I said, well, how would he shoot that way if all he did went to practice?

SPEAKER_01 37:44

Right. Go for that little practice and go on home.

SPEAKER_00 37:47

Yeah, you know, you practice from 6 30 to 8 30, 9 o'clock. No, he he he's not gonna be able to shoot that way. I said, so whatever school schedule y'all have, I'm gonna build his workout around it.

SPEAKER_03 37:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:59

He gotta put the work in. It's no such thing as sitting on your ass or sitting around not doing nothing.

SPEAKER_01 38:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 38:05

Nah, dawg. You shoot the way you shoot because you shoot 2,000 shots a week.

SPEAKER_01 38:09

I said, nah, dog. That happened.

SPEAKER_00 38:13

You you you shoot that way because of the shots you put up every week. You know, your footwork getting better because of the work you do. Oh, y'all that tell me, hey, get on treadmill, do two or three miles.

SPEAKER_01 38:23

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_00 38:24

And then you're right here anyway.

SPEAKER_01 38:25

I always miss that so much. Like the way the game plays so fast now, and honestly, the girls' game is really positionless. You really don't have six like real bigs for real to be drilled. So it's like, baby, you gotta be in shape. So, Jen, let me ask you this, like, and then I'll let you go because I know we've been running it. So there is somebody who's listening right now, and you've dropped plenty of gems for the sports parents. Um, they could just be stopped starting this journey and feeling overwhelmed. Let's pour into them for a little bit. So, if a dad came to you tomorrow and said, we're just starting this journey, what do we need to know? What's the first thing you tell them?

SPEAKER_00 39:03

Man, first, first thing first, you gotta be patient. You know, because I I know a lot of people, they want to rush to see the progress. No, no, no. It takes time. You know, so you gotta be realistic about your kid developing. So if if, for example, if you might run to some second grade kids that can play like fifth or sixth grade, like, damn, how'd they get so good? Your kid probably can't dribble yet. So you can't you can't look at that kid and be like, why my son not doing this? or why my son not shooting this way? You you can't do that. So you gotta be patient with that because everybody developed at a different time. Even even a kid we went to school with, you know, Thad a good friend of mine. I don't think, to me, I say it all the time, I don't think Thad got like cold until like 10th grade. So when we were kids, he wasn't what, you know, what we see now on the internet, a kid got scholarships in the fifth grade, sixth grade. He was never like that, you know. But I watched him 10th grade become top five player in the country.

SPEAKER_03 40:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 40:00

And watched him go off to college and become a lottery pick and have a successful NBA career. That's why I tell parents, elementary kids or middle school, don't fall into the ranking. No, don't fall into paying attention to those things because, you know, you'll get stuck. There were times where, you know, uh, even when Memphis did like a little uh basketball level for kids back at home, they ranked my son. I was like, y'all ain't gotta do that.

SPEAKER_01 40:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 40:25

We were playing against kids, and they was like, he ranked number 10, he ranked this. I'm like, bruh, y'all in his fifth grade. I'm like, that don't matter. I'm like, listen, it's a long road. Let's get there. We want to develop or get you to high school, get you playing at a high level early. That's it. But whether you reclass your kid or not, I didn't reclass COVID. I mean, I'm kind of cool that I didn't.

SPEAKER_01 40:47

Yeah, well look, we said the same thing. We like, yeah, we should have reclassed her.

SPEAKER_00 40:50

I you know, I I I thought about that. I thought about that, you know. Thought about that then, you know, but what I what I did was the guy that he trained with here, I let him play with him over the summer. You know, he did uh he did you as a 15-year-old. He was perfectly fine. I mean, I'm like, of course you had people 6'8, 6'7. But he did perfectly fine. So I was like, well, go on. But uh the parents, like I say, they have to be realistic with their kids. Yeah, set a goal, set a plan. I want my son shooting to get better, okay? Put the shots in. I want my son ball handling to get better. Okay, work on ball handling. So create a plan. Follow the plan. It'll get you to where you want to get to. You can't just wake up and do this. Nah, you gotta be prepared for it, man. Well, and and like I say, you know, with twins, twin mom, she was an athlete.

SPEAKER_03 41:38

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 41:39

She's six one. Yeah, she she's six one, you know. So uh my twins are gonna be giants probably. But she was she was a hell of an athlete. And so she understands the journey that I put in with Kobe, you know, more than what his mom did at the time. But his mom understands now, so it's like he got a whole village, man. We all know this is what it takes for you to get out of here.

SPEAKER_01 41:58

Yep, yep. And that's what it really takes. And it's the last question, and I'm and you go. When you when people hear your son's name one day, when they hear Kobe's name, what do you hope they say about him? And what do you hope they say about you or your village?

SPEAKER_00 42:14

Well, you know, I I like I said I think it's when people say his name, I just hope it's all positive things. You know, and um, you know, like I say, so far that it always been that way. Great kid. I think he's better than me as a hermit. Like that's a fact. So I feel like I done my job because he's he's such a great kid. And I'd be like, damn, I wish I was like that at this stage of my life, but he didn't the the the stuff that he been set up for, I didn't I didn't have it. And that's a great thing.

SPEAKER_03 42:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 42:41

So, you know, so so that's that's the main thing. I just want them to know, man, just to say, you know, positive things about, you know, make sure they say, hey man, Kobe, he works hard, man. Kobe put in a work to get to where he's at right now. You know, and and I can't be better no more happier than that. So that's what I want to hear. You know, they know that it's not just me doing this, it's his mom, you know, it's it's the twins' mom, my girl at home. It's like that's how he's getting what he's getting. It's it's a lot of us hands-on. So that's that's the story about Kobe.

SPEAKER_01 43:10

That's what's up, Jedman. This was everything. Thank you for sitting down with me for being real and for sharing your family story. Memphis made us and we went on things. Look at us now. Like we are parents.

SPEAKER_03 43:24

Oh, yeah, man.

SPEAKER_01 43:26

Both for the next generation in our own way. I'm proud of you, Jed. I am.

SPEAKER_00 43:30

Yeah, sign here, same here, man.

SPEAKER_01 43:32

Um, so to everybody watching, if this hits home, please share it with a sports parent who needs to hear it and tag them, to them. Let them know they're not alone. There are people out here who can provide a blueprint support in some type of way. And y'all keep an eye out on Jed's son. That young man is special. Remember, he's only a freshman, so he got plenty more time to get even better rooting from here up every step of the way. I'm this is Jed and This has been Time Out. See y'all next time. Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 44:02

Thank you, man.

SPEAKER_01 44:03

Appreciate you. I'll be watching.

SPEAKER_00 44:05

Anytime. Same here, man. Reach out anytime y'all need something, man. Y'all out this way.

SPEAKER_01 44:10

I appreciate you. Have a good one.

SPEAKER_00 44:12

You too.

SPEAKER_01 44:13

Bye bye.