He Said, G Said

Love is Blind's Alexa Lemieux: Heartbreak, Divorce and The Next Chapter

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On today’s episode of He Said, G Said, G and Blake sit down with their close friend Alexa Lemieux from Love Is Blind Season 3 for her first public conversation since announcing her divorce from Brennon.

Alexa opens up about heartbreak, healing, navigating such a personal chapter publicly, and what life has looked like since the end of her marriage. She also reflects on her relationship with Brennon, becoming a mom to their daughter Vienna, and what this exciting next chapter of her life looks like moving forward.

SPEAKER_01

She said what?

SPEAKER_00

No way she said that.

SPEAKER_01

It's time for these motherfuckers listening.

SPEAKER_02

Hey everyone, I'm Gianina.

SPEAKER_06

And I'm Blake.

SPEAKER_02

And this is our first ever home studio episode of He Said G Said. Welcome to our humble abode.

SPEAKER_06

We have a home studio finally. It's a long time in the works, but we got it. Shout out to Denver Modern giving us the furniture. It fits perfectly. It's cozy, classy chic, all the words that you like to use.

SPEAKER_02

A literal work of art. Yes. And yeah, we're so grateful that we're able to take this guy on the road whenever we can. We have our LA studio, which is for fun episodes like Starcross.

SPEAKER_06

Most of our interviews, and obviously Starcross will be in LA. We're gonna have some one-on-one just us talking pop culture, parenting, our lives here in Denver. So you'll be seeing this set up often as well.

SPEAKER_02

Um and then sometimes we'll take it on the road. You don't know, whenever you'll see a He said, G said pop-up podcast.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, obviously we travel all the time between music festivals and uh opportunities in New York and wherever. So we'll be doing it on the road as well, which is which is really cool.

SPEAKER_02

Wow, what a dream.

SPEAKER_06

It is, it is, it is. It's all coming together, you know, it's all coming together. But we did want to take some time to thank you guys so much. I mean, it's been a little, it's been about two weeks now uh since we announced the podcast, and the love and support has been overwhelming. So thank you guys so much, honestly, from the bottom of our hearts. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Um, it's been, I don't know, it's been incredible.

SPEAKER_02

This has been just a long time coming, I think, for the both of us. I I hosted the first ever Love is Blind podcast back in 2020 called Love Insight. Shout out if you heard me talking with G Money Matt Money or something. It was really fun. Um, and then Blake had Behind the Rose. And um I feel like it for me, COVID kind of just took my legs out from under me a bit. And I've been trying to get back into this space. I've I loved it. I loved being able to just connect with everybody and and see different points of views. And I think it really, and I I tried, I knocked on the door for so long, but it wouldn't have happened without you. I think I think this this works. This works on so many levels.

SPEAKER_06

Um, but yeah, I mean, you guys, the like we said, the love has been overwhelming. I mean, our first StarCrust episode on the He Said G Said podcast now is almost a 200,000 views. So thank you guys so much. We knew it was gonna be great. And we we knew there was some magic happening when we were thinking of this show and we were recording it, but um, it's so cool to see that you guys are out there. So please be sure to subscribe um on the YouTube and go follow us on Instagram and TikTok and all the above.

SPEAKER_02

Um and comment who you think we should match make next. And we'll be doing uh recaps of our couples. We'll keep you guys updated and hopefully we make a match made in heaven.

SPEAKER_06

Yes, yes, yes. We're excited.

SPEAKER_02

And uh, we love all our matches so far. I feel like we're nailing it.

SPEAKER_06

I think so. So, well, let's not get ahead of ourselves. We still, yeah, yeah. We got a big one coming up.

SPEAKER_02

Knock on Denver Modern Wood. Yes.

SPEAKER_06

Um, uh today's episode. Let's talk about today's episode.

SPEAKER_02

No, no, no. Today's episode is okay. So she's literally one of my best friends and someone that I connected with instantly. I didn't have really many friends when Love is Wine came out because there was only one season and the COVID and everything. But I was really lucky to um have such a great connection with Alexa from season three. And I really saw a lot of her journey uh unfold, especially when you know she had her daughter Vienna and marriage life, and now she's entering a whole new chapter. Um, and my girl is thriving.

SPEAKER_06

Yes, yes. We're gonna get all the all the deets, all the tea from her. Um G kind of mentioned it, but but uh Alexa and Brennan got married on the show and later welcomed their beautiful baby girl Vienna, um, a little after four years. They were married for four years, um, and unfortunately, you know, recently split. So obviously we're getting into that. Um, but yeah, I think she's I think this is she's at a good point in her life right now to address everything from the past, um, kind of what she went through and then what she's got coming.

SPEAKER_02

What she's going on now. And yeah, uh, I mean, we all became close friends, right? And all the reunions we would always meet up. And so we were so sad to hear that Alexa and Brennan decided to get a divorce, and that's definitely nothing that anyone wants to go through. But um, you know, especially when you have a child involved, you really just want the best for each other, and I think that they're both taking it in stride. And she is one of the strongest people I have ever met. And so I I think you know, this will be good for them. The happiness for everyone involved is the utmost priority. So I can't wait to hear her share her story. Wow, well, I'm so excited to welcome uh my very, very good friend, Alexa.

SPEAKER_06

The first official guest of He Said She's Dead. Oh, what? Because all we've got is a Starcross episode. So you are the first official guest and the first guest here in Denver. So it's only a premiere. Yes. Down, down from here, down premiere.

SPEAKER_02

No, this is like it couldn't be any better. I feel like it's literally it worked out.

SPEAKER_06

Keith and Vienna are like gonna get married, they're gonna be married, like cuddling. Yeah, it's perfect, it worked out so good. No, I'm obsessed.

SPEAKER_05

Now I'm gonna have to come here all the time.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, so have you been to Denver before?

SPEAKER_05

No. Well, maybe to ski. Oh, okay. Yeah, it cut it down. I can tell you I really block all those memories out because I don't know if you can tell, but like I'm not really a skier. Like, I'm not really the athletic type. Um, yeah. So we're gonna have to have Ravia this winter. Yeah, oh no, for sure. We just go this weekend in a little like snowsuit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's we have to have like enough photos for the montage at the wedding. So clearly.

SPEAKER_02

We have to be like, this is when you two are in diapers. Yeah. And it was always meant to me. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

We can be mother in laws. We would be mother-in-law. Mother-in-laws, right?

SPEAKER_02

Mother-in-laws, but there's like I think there's a name for it in Spanish. Suegras.

SPEAKER_06

Suegras.

SPEAKER_02

We'd be suegrass. Yeah. That's us. I should have you say it every time. Okay. I would die. I've always wanted to like have friends family.

SPEAKER_05

Because that would suck to not get along.

SPEAKER_02

That would with it would suck to not get along.

SPEAKER_05

That's the worst. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

But how are you doing? How is Vienna? How are things going right now for you?

SPEAKER_05

Amazing. Uh, Vienna is just, I mean, as you guys, they just grow so fast. And it's just every time I like you know, that's hard, obviously, because some of my time I'm not, you know, with her, but it's it's it's so incredible. And it's with everything going on, she's very resilient and she's you know, she's very smart and she's she's thriving, and that was obviously my number one concern. So, but uh she's she's doing her thing.

SPEAKER_02

So you guys have a very special bond, yeah.

SPEAKER_05

Oh, Vienna and I are like, that's my girl. Like, I just I don't know, I was like truly that's just my child, you know. Like Johnny, my child, that's like my soulmate right there. That's a great way to feel like she's my soulmate. I feel that like we just look at each other, and I just feel like we just like do you feel like you've known her in other lifetimes? Oh, 1000%. Yeah, I'm gonna cry, but yes, every lifetime. I just like yeah, I because her middle name is after my softa, my grandma, who passed away, and she was born a few days after my grandma was born, and so even I don't know, with her, I just like because I had such a special connection with my grandma, and that I sometimes I feel like you know that like she's a part of her, yeah. And they say, like, um, sometimes when women go through infertility that it's because someone on the other side has like was taking care of them for you, and then they sent them to you like when you were ready. Oh my gosh, I've never been there. I'm so sad. Whoa, I gave zero. I know I like tearing up, it's crazy. I sometimes feel that yeah that she's been with her and then I got to have her.

SPEAKER_02

How are you feeling about talking with us today about everything?

SPEAKER_05

Good. I mean, everything has been well, not everything, but on um my life is I'm just keeping it everything positive, you know, with everything. I mean, yeah, it's kind of like when um something closes, you know. What I say, when a door opens, a thousand more open, what's the saying? Yeah, when like one door closes, two doors open. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I kind of just like feel like that's what my life has been. Like I just saw like it going one way, and um as wonderful as that time was, I'm really happy that that door shut, and now so many other things are opening up, and it's been really incredible. And I think um my number one thing is when everything was kind of happening was that I want my child to see what happiness looks like, and I want my child to see what love looks like, and I just right now with at the time with what was happening, I was like, this isn't it, and I can't call myself a good mom and and not do those things and give that to her, and I and it's so interesting. I'm gonna try not to get emotional over it, but I I I get so frustrated because I get a lot of commentary of people saying that you know, broken home, broken home, and I'm like, are y'all be so for real? Like it's 2026 and I and broken home, I would rather my parents divorced, and I'm so like I was the kid that was like, please get a divorce, and you know, I everyone was happier afterwards, and I think that the broken home is not when two parents are apart. It's you know, obviously that that's that would be the goal, and everyone's you know, happy and whatever, but if that's not what's happening, then keeping something that's clearly not working, that's the broken home.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, we're the same.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, you know, broken homes, and it's it's such like an outdated thing, and babe, you get one freaking life to lose, you know, live. And it's just like, why not be happy doing it? And if something's not working out, you know, everything happens for a reason. And I have my child that I love more than anything in this life out of it, and um I'll always be grateful for the time that was shared. And then now I get to live the rest of my life. And I I like in the beginning of everything, I kind of was a little angry with God, and I was like, you know, why is this happening to me? Like this is you know, this sucks. And then one day it just clicked, like, thank you, God, for I'm 31. I get to start over. Like I get a whole life ahead of me. I hope that I have a chance to have more kids, you know, like that's still an option for me, and to um, you know, if I ever want to get remarried, like there's still so many things that can happen in my life, and I'm still so young, and it's like it's my first time living too. And it's so true.

SPEAKER_06

Because you could have 10 years from now, maybe.

SPEAKER_05

You know, and I think about that a lot.

SPEAKER_02

I'm just like, well, I'd I'm happy that if it were to happen, you still have that time to like redefine like what your family's gonna look like with Vienna. She's young enough, you're young enough, like you got your experience, what you needed to learn out of it. God like just does it in whatever time he thinks it's right, for sure. And and like I completely agree with you. Like, my parents got divorced when I was 14, and I'm like dang that was real ripe. Like, and you guys weren't happy for years, and and it was just like this long drawn-out process. So that's why I really commend you, yeah, and you know, and Brennan to just like have that make that really, really tough decision just to be able to live out your happiness, which again is the highest priority.

SPEAKER_05

And like, so we were four kids when for with my parents, and my youngest brother, when they split, he was six months old. And I mean, out of all the four of us, my brother's he's fucking thriving. He just got a D U T. You know, I'm so excited for him. He's an incredibly smart child, he's he's just thriving in life. And I feel like if you were to rate our issues on a scale of one of ten, he didn't get any. So I'm like, he knows that. And that truly, like, you know, that was hard, you know, when making when making a decision for everything of you know, she's so young. And I'm I look at my brother and I'm like, she's not taking, you know, if if something were to stay in the situation that it was, like it wasn't gonna, you know, necessarily get better. So what looking at my brother, I'm like, look how he's thriving, and I hope that that's the same kind of thing happens with my child, you know, and she's still so young.

SPEAKER_06

So, like, what made you decide like today, like you're ready to speak publicly? Because I know it's not hard, I know it's not easy. Should I say it's not easy? So, kind of what made you decide? You're like, you know what? This is the time, this is the time you want to talk about it all.

SPEAKER_05

I don't feel like I really have um that's a great question. It's not, it's not, it's I feel like I'm a really great place in my life. Obviously, divorce is tough, and while things are happening, it's tough. And we were still living together in the same house up until two months ago, and so that's tough. And you're like, you know, still living under the same roof, and now it's a very obviously a different dynamic going through divorce, and you know, you're going to you know things, and then you're coming back under the same roof, and then you're also dealing with shit online and so many people saying things, and you know, whatever, and you're still in the same house. But we, you know, I I think for the most part, um we we we were doing pretty well, you know, having you know, trying to have dinners together still and trying to find like a friendly dynamic um with it and trying to make it as I think as at the end of the day, you still got a co-parent, right? Yeah, and you have to co-parent, yeah. Like at the end of the day, you can't like with a child that still gets up in the middle of the night. It's like that's already hard, kind of like when you're in a more of a team, I feel like a little bit. And um, so I think we try to keep things as as normal as possible. It's much easier now. I think it also when you're going through like it's when you're still kind of living together, it kind of makes that kind of process in your mind, like you've made up something, but you're still like in it, you know. It's such a weird limb. Like a weird limbo.

SPEAKER_02

It really dictates a lot.

SPEAKER_05

So I I it's it's much I I mean, obviously, I can just speak for myself, but I am I'm doing really well. I just really know. So and I like I even did like a post like life is more fun when you're happy or having fun or something like that. And and people are like, oh, and I'm like, but I am like I I don't like I'm not trying to, it's it's truly not putting on a show. And I um I don't know. I just I I'm I'm really happy and I'm just I'm really grateful that I kind of just get like a second chance at life, and and I know people are gonna I'm excited to start dating again. Like my marriage was the first serious relationship I've ever been in. Um I never dated seriously before that, and I got married. Yeah, I got married in six weeks, and so I learned a lot. Six weeks was your like serious relationship. Really, just the dates were put on by Netflix, so you know, like you know serious relationships, yeah. Yeah, so um, so I'm just excited to like go on a date and just like get flowers and just like be wooed a little bit. I don't know. Last time I was wooed. I don't think that's ever happened to me, um, other than Netflix. So I'm really excited to kind of go from there and just like talk to people and it's been fun being like a little flirty. Yeah, you know. I slid in um to Blake's DMs, not in a weird way.

SPEAKER_03

Um Blake posted it a little cutie, and I was like, And I was like, well, he might be coming to the wedding.

SPEAKER_06

And I was like, he's sitting next to mama.

SPEAKER_02

Okay, I know I didn't know how to do the speeding chart now. Okay, you're gonna hear first Alexa looks flowers um we like a nice cocktail. Yeah, uh and uh Well, let's go back then.

SPEAKER_06

Let's go back because I didn't we didn't know that about you. Um let's go back to Love is Blind then. Let's let's go back to that.

SPEAKER_03

We gotta go.

SPEAKER_05

I just finished therapy. Right.

SPEAKER_06

So what was if you could, you know, summarize that crazy experience. Like, what was that for you? Like going into it, how did you feel?

SPEAKER_05

Um, going into it, so like I mentioned earlier, my my my grandma had passed away a a little bit before that, and I think I was just in a phase of just like fuck it, life is short. I think was my kind of mentality on stuff. And um I I was doing I just I mean I've talked about a few times, but I was doing dry January and my sister sent me the application and I was just like, whatever, got a call and I was like, wait, what? Like that's weird, and then I was like, whatever, like do it. Like I just I honestly wanted to see the behind the scenes on how everything's done. Like how I kind of like, you know, you never think that I mean, and I had never said I love you to a man, and then day three, I'm like, I love you fucking weird. I don't know, you know? No, it's weird, it's weird, and I'm like, what are they putting in the water here? Um, no, it was weird, and then you just kind of, you know, I mean, I just truly think everything happens for a reason because you know, we met and it was um it's it's interesting because I saw like I had only dated Hispanic men before that. That was listen. I surely didn't know. That's what you did. Truly, I mean, um, yeah, no, that was my was my strictly my thing. And so um Star Cross. Um so yeah, I was just like open to the idea of whatever. And then yeah, like it just you just kind of get like swept up in it, and um obviously the the feelings, it's it's crazy because I remember like just during my marriage thinking like, you know, which is weird to talk about now, but I remember while we were married, I remember thinking like, wow, like I loved him on our wedding day, but I love him like so much more now, like as you know, whatever. And obviously that's it's a little different now, but I just it was I know it's crazy to talk about that and then be kind of where I am now. But I don't know, I feel like everything in life is just like a lesson learned.

SPEAKER_02

Well, in the way that you were describing, because I mean our stories are very different, clearly. Like I didn't win Love is Blind. Like I got.

SPEAKER_03

Well, um, I said that I didn't. I guess I didn't. Uh they can't take that trophy back. No, you know.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, you got it. Um, but I it's I always wanted to hear kind of like the other side of things, like the success stories of what it's like for that other person to say yes to you back at the altar. But do you think being a success story kind of added on to the pressure of your marriage? Of like, let's try to make it work, or do you think it had anything to do?

SPEAKER_05

Um, I mean, I definitely felt, I mean, when I told my family, um they were so chill about it.

SPEAKER_07

Really?

SPEAKER_05

I love him. Well, my dad, I mean, I was, I mean, I I remember going to see him and I like broke down crying and I was like, we're having issues, like, what do you think? And he was like, when is when it's good, is it good? And I was like, yeah. And he was like, well, then I would try to fight for it. And I did, and I continue to, and it's hard like seeing stuff online pointing out the fucking obvious um of like, why don't you guys do these things? Like, you didn't, it's it's like, no, I didn't just wake up one day and like you know, like there there was. There was, um, I mean, I I I can only speak for myself. I I did everything that I could because I knew that one day I'd have to look at my daughter and be like, you know, you know, we tried. I can say that I one thousand percent did that. Um and it's been kind of hard because it's talking about all of this is difficult because it seems like everything it it I I never wanted to come across anything that I say is a dig at someone else, you know, like the the other person, and it's so it's kind of hard, but it's also hard because it's like it's my experience too. Like this is a part of my life and I share a lot of my life online and I feel like I'm kind of just um not acknowledging like a huge chapter and like a huge like the elephant in the room of like hee hee, and uh I I it's hard to like show that I'm I don't know, either happy or I'm like making a sarcastic joke because that's how I talk, and it's it's I never want it to come across that I'm shooting daggers at someone else and trust me, like we got a divorce, so sometimes after a few glasses of wine, like I want to say something. But I mean, my my I I never want to ever say anything that my daughter would see one day and like not be you know proud of how I handled something, and you know, that's that's her parent as well. So I'm just trying to do my best over here and kind of just like navigate sharing my life and my experience. And it's also hard because I get so many women that reach out all the time. Like, how did you know when it was time? Like, I have oh my god, hundreds of women, and I it's hard because I don't really know how to respond to it because I don't know what's gonna be you know, screenshot it and shared, and I don't know what's the right thing to say, and I can't I don't know anyone else's marriage. I knew for me that I knew when it was time, and I knew that I exhausted everything, and I knew that I gave it my all, and I knew that this was no longer um I just thought it grew something and I it just didn't work, and you know, it is what it is, and that's not on anybody else, that's not anyone else's fault. I just um it's hard and I want to give advice to women. I don't it's it's a hard thing to, you know.

SPEAKER_02

But I think that comes with time. Yeah. For me, you know, being able to speak on like a toxic relationship or this like I when I was in the thick of it, I was like, I don't feel like I have that credibility yet because one, I'm still going through the healing myself and I mean, I just want to say, like, from I'm your friend, but you know, we get to see things in all different perspectives. And I don't think you have not once, like you've always risen above. Yeah. And I just want to say that yes, you got married on an international TV show. And yes, you share your life online, but you don't owe anybody anything.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Like you owe yourself this time. You owe your your whatever, you know, your your respect and your time to Vienna. But other than that, I think you're doing a fantastic job. And I appreciate it. You can't, I feel like, I mean, we see women and and men, and we see people go through divorces online, especially if they're public figures. And you can tell when someone is spiraling, you can tell when someone is just going through the healing, and you can tell when someone is glowing and thriving and made the best decision for themselves. And you are doing exactly that. So I think just keep doing what you're doing. And women or men, you know, can just see that as an inspiring thing. And when you feel like, oh, maybe I can speak on a little bit about how I, you know, kind of overcame this, then then you can't. I don't feel like when it fills right on there.

SPEAKER_05

Oh, yeah. But I it is just just it's there. It's there.

SPEAKER_02

And I'm like, and you're like, what? I want to help. Like I'm also going to be. It's it's very interesting being in a position.

SPEAKER_06

Do you think because there is, you know, we came, we're a quote unquote success stories from reality TV, but you're from a love reality TV show. You know, it's completely different the amount of pressure and the amount of noise you have and all that. Do you think what do you think was like the thing that you felt was misunderstood the most about your guys' relationship? Or was there something that you feel like the public just didn't understand about your relationship or even where you're at now?

SPEAKER_05

Um, I mean, I think that a lot because there's so much. I mean, I know that you people saw such a small part of it, and then they think it's fake, and it's like, baby, if you saw the shit I did, that was not fake. That was that's embarrassing. If, you know, if it was like we're not getting paid to stay together. Yeah, and it's like, no, we're not paying, like, uh, please, I'm waiting for that check. Um, you know, divorce uh fees are very expensive. Um, so it's just it's I think that there's a lot, like people, I think they just assume because you got married in the way that you did, that it's like not real. And it's not, you know, and I I I also understand like being swept up in the moment of it all. Like, I mean, I definitely felt that, but once the cameras go off, like it's just you and it's you and him. That's it. Like, there's no anything. There is no, you're not getting paid to stay together. You're there's there's no reason other than you genuinely want to be together. Um, and so I think that I think that's the biggest thing. And people like, oh, I knew they were gonna break up. Oh, they you could tell from day one, or or you could like, baby, if I didn't fucking know, how did you know? Like, I guess like I don't, you know, like we went through really hard, you know, just in our personal lives, like, you know, you know, family members passing away and just day-to-day, you know, hardships and things that happen and bills to pay and all those things. And then, you know, when I went through infertility, and that's real, and those are real things that happened. And, you know, he was the person that was holding my hand the day I gave birth, you know, and I brought our daughter into the world. Like, there's real things that happen, and there's so much time that, you know, obviously that we spent together. We we were together for almost five years. That's a lot of time, and that's more than you know, 10 episodes that you saw on TV what four years ago, you know, like so it's a lot, and I think it's it's it is hard to read comments sometimes that people just like tie it up into like something that's so simple and it's like it's so complicated, you know. And we're still figuring it out right now. Like, you know, we're texting right now about you know how you know while while I'm here, and you know, that that's somebody that's gonna be in my life for the rest of my life. And I've I have been, I commend myself for how much I've seen big picture of this entire situation because it's so easy to get caught up in like totally ha you know, like you know, it's hard, especially when you have the platform.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, and you're like that's true, that's so true. I'm telling you, a few glasses of wine, and I just well I will say it's a good thing.

SPEAKER_05

But no, no, but the whole thing is you know, seeing the big picture, and we have a child, and there's gonna be, you know, we're about to start potty training her. And now I have, you know, I told him, you know, this is our schedule. This is the body, you know, the potty that I bought, and then he's like, okay, send me the link so he can have the same one too. So, like, that's real things that are behind the scenes of you're that you're seeing online, and it's nothing, it's hard because I feel like when I'm posting, it's to get like things. Oh, they broke up because of this. Oh, clearly it's because, and it's like I'm just posting my life because this is what I'm doing, and I'm just moving on, and everybody thinks there's like underlying tones, your couch or to your stories, and it's like nothing.

SPEAKER_02

Oh, he looked at her this way in this one video, so it's it's like, listen, you check in periodically, this is my higher life.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, so it's just um, and it's also hard for me because I feel like I'm just naturally very sarcastic, and so it's you know, I and but it, you know, but things also really get to me sometimes, and sometimes things that I read are really mean and hard, and I'm just it's the worst fucking human being that you know I have a daughter who has a tantrum, and then I have to read something fucking rude on the internet, and I'm just like, you know, like it's just sometimes it hits you in bad moments, and I'm just I'm just a human that's doing my best. I'm a mom, I'm a single mom that's doing my best, and it's it's it's a lot, and but I'm doing it, and I am proud of myself because I know that I'm gonna want to make my daughter proud. And I'm doing things right now that are super exciting. I just um I applied to be, I'm definitely not gonna get it, but I applied to be like a Victoria's Secret Angel, which would be so freaking cool. Um, I've been traveling, I've been doing things that you know I probably wouldn't have done if I was still married because you know, you get kind of in your bubble. You know, I was just you know, just at home all day with my baby, and and now I'm have every other weekend free, and it's hard. And it's definitely I didn't have a baby to only, you know, not see her every other weekend, but I'm gonna go do like really, really fun things. I'm gonna be at Miami Swim Week, you know, and so it's like it's it's fun and it's interesting kind of juggling like these two lives, but I I have to remember remind myself because I get mom guilt and I get a lot of oh look, she's just out partying and she's just drinking and she's a bad mom, and I'm like, my baby's not with me. Okay, and I'm like 31 and this is my first time living too. Like, and I get to go do really, really fun things and um and then I get to go right back to being an incredible mom. And I feel like I'm a better, I already felt like I was a really, really great mom, but I feel like I'm an even better mom now because I show up more and I feel like I'm more me than I have been in a really, really long time. I feel like I lost myself for a while there, where it just everyone else's needs went first, and I really lost who I was, and I'm rediscovering that and it's it's been fun. Like it's just it's just been fun. I feel like I'm closer with my friends, I feel like I'm closer with my family. I'm just doing things that I want to do. I'm not having to check with someone else, like, oh, do you want to go do this? Like, I gotta choose if I want to do it, and then I go do it.

SPEAKER_02

So we're definitely very glass half full because perspective is so big and and everything. And I love that you are just taking all the opportunities and just being like, okay, this is my new life now. And so, how can I just be the better version of me in this new life? And I mean, it's so interesting because, like, okay, you go out and party, and everyone says, Oh, okay, why is she going out? We go out and party and we don't get that. Yeah, so what the fuck is the difference? The baby's fat, she's being taken care of. What's very well?

SPEAKER_05

Vienna lives better than I do, actually. I do. She is very well taken care of, and you know, her her dad loves her very much and he takes great care of her. She has two parents that love her more than anything, and that's all I need from him is to be a good parent to her, and he does that, and so and you get to fill your own cup, yeah. And I know that like when the times that are even, you know, as hard as it is when I'm not with her, I know she's in good hands, I know she's being taken care of, and so that's big. I, you know, sleep well at night. And that's good. Actually, I sleep like a fucking baby. I sleep and go to bed. Sleep so well now.

SPEAKER_03

Um, I go to bed and lights out. Um, I I don't know. It's just life is good.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Well, that's great. That's great. Yeah. We love to hear that. Yeah, we love to hear that.

SPEAKER_02

But at what point did you realize that the marriage just wasn't working anymore? Can you walk us through that a little bit?

SPEAKER_05

Um, I think that there were probably more moments than I acknowledged at the time. Um it's hard because sometimes, you know, you're told that, you know, when stuff, you know, like marriage has problems and all marriages do. But I think that there's a fine line between um I think that what I learned is you have to have two people that want a marriage to work. And I was exhausted trying to do that. I was I was tired and I was it's hard to like try and hold on to something when it feels like the other person kind of let it go a long time ago and it doesn't, you know, like that's that's hard. And I look back and I I mean I joke to my friends and I'm like I'm embarrassed for some of the things that I think that I just try to make myself smaller to you know to kind of change for someone else, and not that that person asked me to, but I kept trying to figure out what the other person wanted me to be, and I tried to be that and that's hard. Um, especially postpartum when you're trying to figure out like you're trying to find yourself together, you know, as you know, as well. And um yeah, and I just I think that I was but I know there's a lot that I could say on it, but I mean the end result is the same, and again, I'm just happy that it happened when it did, and I I I would have stayed forever, but I'm glad that I didn't, you know?

SPEAKER_02

Felt like a long-way street.

SPEAKER_06

Felt like you were putting in all the work. So I mean that that kind of leads to the next question. Was at the end of the day, was the marriage or was the divorce mutual?

SPEAKER_05

Um yes. Um, I I had asked for it. Um and it wasn't because there was a lack of love on my part. I just was I couldn't do it anymore. I was tired, and I just went again, my main thing was I just wanted my daughter to see what love looks like, and that wasn't it. And I was I would it would be my biggest failure as a mom for that to be what she thought it was. I I saw something that was actually it sounds so stupid, but I saw something on TikTok and it was like if your daughter was in the relationship that you're in, would you be proud or would you be disappointed?

SPEAKER_06

That's deep.

SPEAKER_04

Literally crying with you. And I would have been really disappointed. That would have broken my heart. So that was my answer. And I was like, why do I deserve this then? You know, so hee hee.

SPEAKER_06

If I take away anything from this, I hope if anybody listening takes anything away from it, that's a good perspective. I feel like it's like would you be proud of your daughter or son being in the way she wow?

SPEAKER_02

I mean, we talk about it a lot too, where it's like you've heard the saying, like you have to fall in love with the same person over and over and over and over again. And it's a choice, like it is a choice, and especially when you evolve and to go there, it's a work, it's it's work.

SPEAKER_05

And that was, I think that was my perspective on the situation. Was it's hard, but it's work. What good things do you have in life that's not work, you know? Right.

SPEAKER_02

So yeah, and you put in the work, baby. Yeah, you do.

SPEAKER_05

I did it and I'm good.

SPEAKER_06

Well, I think that's that that can be such a freeing feeling to know that you not to do it. Yeah, that you left it all all out on the field. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, which is not I I I don't think there's many people that can say that. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05

Like I don't think there's many people I try to live my life with like no regret, and I I I I'm kind of an all or all or nothing person. So I feel like with me, I when I'm in it, I'm in it. And then I just reach a point where I'm like, okay, you know, actually I'm done. Like I've done everything that I can and I can't keep giving anymore. And so um, you know, I wish I wish so much happiness for, you know, my ex. Um I I truly wish him all all the good in the world because that's what is what's going to Vienna is gonna see. Like that's also her parent. But she's you know, like I I don't have any animosity, I don't have any ill will. It just it didn't work out, and that's just that's it. And this is somebody I'm gonna have to see at school events and you know, like all the in betweens and the little things, and I think people forget that, and it's a very like verses and you know, team, whatever. And I I'm it's it's I don't I don't care, like it's just not it's not the um Team Vienna, you know what I mean? Like NASA that's that's it, and um no one knows what's best for her better than than he does, and me. Like that's those are the two people that have her in mind more than our parents, more than his parents, more than people online, more than anybody else. There's two people, and you know, I during this process I even sat down. I told him that I was like, you know, I feel like there's a lot of outside noise that you're getting that I'm getting, and nobody is nobody knows what's better for us and for a child than us. So um and it's easy to get caught up into it, you know. Everyone wants on the sides of whatever, everyone wants what's best for that person. And you know, but at the end of the day, him and I are the only ones that are gonna be living that life, you know. You can whatever. And I mean, I had to talk to my friends and my family, and I'm like, you know what, you're just you're not the one that's gonna have to live it. Like you, I get it, like you have my best interest at heart. Like I you're a team me and you have my back, and I appreciate that more than anything, but you're not the one that's having to, you know, show up for Vienna at the end of the day. You just get to, you know, so it's hard. It's it's hard, and um, but um I'm glad that it's you know, over and and uh in a romantic way, and I'm glad that um him and I just love Vienna so much, and that's really what I'm grateful for. So that's great.

SPEAKER_02

So you would say looking back because you live your life with immigrants and I'm the same way, like you put everything on the table. There's nothing that you would do differently in your relationship.

SPEAKER_05

No, I mean, truly, I I had a really great postpartum experience. Um I you know, I had a I had a wonderful pregnancy. Um great postpartum, and I think that I'm so glad that I got through that part of it. Like I'm glad it didn't happen when she was younger. Obviously, I didn't I'm glad it didn't happen when I was pregnant. I'm glad it didn't happen, you know, the first year that she, you know, I'm glad that I got kind of through all of that, and then it was just like okay, and um it had nothing to do, like a lot of commentaries, you know, that babies make things hard. I think that it brought us closer in a way, um, having her, you know, but not it just at the end of the day, it just it was gonna go where it was gonna go. So I I just I'm just glad it happened when it did. I think I just it really could have gone for another 10 years, and I'm glad that it didn't. And I my dream, I would I've always wanted to have a big family. I've wanted to have a lot of kids, and I'm I'm sad that um, you know, Vienna doesn't have that now, but I'm very hopeful that one day. But if she's the only kid that I have, like I'm I'm more than grateful. She's an amazing child, and I'm so grateful to have her. I just know I love like I'm one of six siblings, and I also know what a like a mixed family looks like. I have um, I mean, I never call her my stepsister, but I have my stepsister, and then I have my youngest sister is my half-sister, and then there's the four of us that are full siblings, and so I I mean like the Kardashians, yeah. Exactly. The Jewish Kardashians. So it's like, you know, and and I look at my siblings like they're all my siblings, and I adore them. And I just love that I have siblings and I love coming from a big family, and I really, really want Vienna to experience that.

SPEAKER_02

So do they help you navigate such a hard situation publicly? Do they help you kind of in the my family?

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, drive me fucking insane. Good families do. I don't know. I I I love them to death, but gosh, they're a lot. And I'm just like shh like sometimes. I don't know. It they're they're a lot, but they're they are really wonderful. And it's I've I've been so close with them, I think that um I don't I don't really know kind of like what happened or how it kind of got there, but I just feel like I wasn't as close with them when I was married, and so kind of just where I'm at right now, like they've they've they've been wonderful, and it's really you know great to see them with Vienna and we're there all the time, and now especially living back in Dallas, um, I'm like four minutes away from my dad's office, so that's cool. Can beep up over there and go annoy him, and so it's so fun. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_06

It's always good to have such a good support system, yeah. Especially going through where you're going and having a child, like it's it's a lot of just like a village.

SPEAKER_02

Uh, how far along are you in the the in the divorce process? Are things finalized?

SPEAKER_05

Um, you know, honestly, that's a really great question. I really don't understand how the process works so much, but yes, essentially, yes, it is it is done. I think it's like the it's just waiting to be like filed if you will. Like into the system, I guess is really what it is. Because there's signs, but like people, it's just funny because I mean, I also don't know, but people online I also don't know. And so, like, when someone like files for divorce, you have to kind of like send a like a response to the filing. You have to like acknowledge the final the the filing basically. And then I remember like the articles popped up like oh Alexa fires back, and I'm like, I'm like my lawyer did that. Like, I like I they they literally just filed like acknowledgement to the filing and it like became a thing. And I'm just yeah, no, it's just things you don't know.

SPEAKER_06

You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_05

That's your I'm just a girl. I don't know.

SPEAKER_03

I don't know. That's what I'm gonna do for.

SPEAKER_06

So obviously, you kind of like you said, it's not it's not a easy slash fun process, obviously for divorce. And part of your journey on the show was disgusting a prenup. Um and how you would go later, you never signed one. How do you feel about that decision now?

SPEAKER_05

You know, Blake. Um, you know, if I was a um if I were to go on Love is like blind to give advice, I would make sure that's in the contract. Y'all have to both sign. Sign a prenup. And if yes, yeah, that should be required.

SPEAKER_06

Like a prenup should be part of the requirement of love is getting married on love is blind. Yes.

SPEAKER_02

In the contract, you're saying.

SPEAKER_05

Yes, that I think that actually should be a part of it very much. So, like we shouldn't even like, hey, you need to sign this before whatever. And I think that that would just help everybody.

SPEAKER_02

Right, because okay, so we're about to get married, we're discussing all the things. Do you have time to get a prenup after you're married? Or is that something that you oppose that's not pre-imposed?

SPEAKER_06

Because I'll be honest, my my ass looked like recently, and I was like, oh, this is harder than I anticipated. I thought it was literally we just check a couple boxes, it's time to I was like, this is a lot harder. There are different types of prenups. So now I wish I would have started like three or four months ago doing this. So if you're out there, you're about to get married, start doing the prenup situation. There's no shame three to four six months. There's no shame in a few.

SPEAKER_05

And there's there should be absolutely zero shame in a prenup. I feel like my mindset on it, and when I was like, oh, I'm not doing that, because it's kind of like jinxing it for the beginning, like, oh, it's not gonna go. But it's it's not, it's just it's okay. Actually, another thing that I saw that is great, you know who you're marrying, you don't know who you're divorcing, you know? And so when you're getting married, you're in love, and and and so if you write a prenup now, you're doing it as somebody who you love him and you want the best for him, and you love her and you want the best for her. And those are the people that you want to sign the prenup because you're like you generally want the best for the other person when you're making those decisions. When you're in divorce, you're kind of like, fuck you, you know, like and you know, and that's normal. I want to say it's very normal. Obviously, if you weren't in that phase, you probably wouldn't be getting a divorce, you know. So, but when you're doing it, when you're together, you you're coming from a loving place when you're doing it. And I mean, I would say, like, even through my divorce process, I did mine from a from a very loving way. Like, I I genuinely do not want to take our daughter from you. Like, I want you to be in her life. I want to do what makes sense for, you know, me being a stay at home mom and me only being with her. Um, you know, me being with her every day, that's what she's used to, you know. But I want to find something that works for everyone. I want holidays to make sense. I I want her to truly. experience both parents and I want what's gonna make sense and what's the healthiest decision with everything. And that's when I would talk about big picture. That was my big picture that I held on to because it is very easy to get caught up and you know, especially when you have lawyers that just you know they want you to, you know, quote unquote win. But when you're going through it, and I mean and I even, you know, told him I was like you and I both know that there's no winners here because we're both losing time with our daughter. And so that's just how I viewed it. Like there is no winning. Do you think he viewed it similarly or do you think or do you think you got caught up in the um and of course there's just times when you just don't um see eye to eye on certain things. And um but yeah and I'm just hoping that we do get to a good place and I I really have the vision of you know talk about the Kardashians you know like we're you know you are because we have a child together. So we're gonna be in each other's lives for the rest of our lives because of our shared art. So you know it'd be really easy if we didn't have a child to not have that mentality but but we do.

SPEAKER_02

So you know and so we just have to see big picture and we have and I'm hoping eventually we'll get to a good place of really really healthy co-parenting and talked about my my parents that like they weren't in it they were in a pretty bad place when they first but now we have holidays together and stuff and I I think that's where the goal time is time yeah time fixes everything right time heals everything uh eventually I mean my parents didn't talk for like seven years but you know they do now they they're actually I put them in one room for the one dun dun by the way too I know I want to listen you want to learn Spanish now put a put a camera in there not like in that weird way but like there they're there is gonna be hilarious. But it did take a lot of time so would you say that like you guys are just in that process right now with your relationship how it is now?

SPEAKER_05

I think I'm ready for it to be normal and I think maybe that that's why it's I think my thing is is that I mourned something while in the marriage maybe you know like the last year like I kind of went through all of those emotions and um kind of mourned it at that time and I feel like I I mean I I honestly I can't speak for for him. I I don't know but I feel like maybe that's why I'm in such a good place now is because I went through all of the emotions previously and so by time I was done I feel like I'm great um and I'm ready to just like move on and be friends and whatever and I'm really hopeful that we'll get there. I really really am so um yeah I mean there is there I I was very close with um some of his family um and that was really hard within itself I mean that's another part that you don't really think of I was you know these are people that I considered to be family and was very very close with and um I'm a very rational person. I know that people have whatever about me but I'm very very rational and I remember even during everything you know telling them like you know when if it's you know just isn't you know whatever that's your family and I would understand and will understand you know if when you'll have his back you know and so um but that's just you know that's just the way things happen and you know maybe one day the that will get better as well but um right now I'm just focused on me. That's all I can do is just be focused on me and what makes me happy and just number one my daughter and number two me.

SPEAKER_02

I mean I can only imagine like I mean I've been as close to divorce as I can at this point with my my my parents and my family and everything but like you really do go into fight or flight.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah it's and it's natural you know and it's just reminding yourself like hey um I think for me what I would look at I this actually sounds so silly. It's not but when I was having just really really hard times I looked back I did my my birthing video and I would look at the person that was holding my hand and um rubbing my leg like a great way to look at it wow um and you know he was there the most magical moment of my life and I try to remember that that's who I was married to and when things got hard that's what I would do.

SPEAKER_02

And how would you describe him back then? You two together back then how would you describe that?

SPEAKER_05

I mean listen it wasn't always um there was just uh there were just a lot of moments and you know it's I hate like it's when it was good it was good and that's it but that's um I just want something that's easier and you know and I just I I feel like I um truly I mean honestly I just feel like we just didn't love each other in the way that the other person needed to be loved. Like I want to be loved out loud like I wanna I want PDA I want my I want you to hold my hand I want you to grab my face and kiss me. I want I I want to feel loved. I want to like not question it. I want to like I want to I just want to be loved out loud and I just um it's not on him in any kind of way there's nothing wrong with him that's just not how he is and um I felt like I was there was no compromise because how do you compromise that you know if someone's not like that I feel like I was just giving that up like and that sucks. And he kind of just you know and I would say that he loved me but I never really felt it you know and I just you know and I just I don't know how else to word that I just didn't feel like I was loved the way that I needed to be loved and I was willing to give that up to keep my family together but at some point I knew I deserved the love that I that I deserve and I would rather not in a mean way I would rather die alone than experience that again you know feeling small and not feeling like I was not getting what I deserved. And so because it's just not something that you can compromise on. It's just truly it's just not you can't compromise someone's love language.

SPEAKER_06

So that's like so important love language is like the number one thing. I feel like you might be a little Latina in you because I feel like she loves getting loved out loud. Yeah that's her like I don't need gifts.

SPEAKER_05

I know everyone it's so annoying. I want everything yeah she wants she wants all the love that's the hard part but for me I think it's so funny that people put me in this box that I'm like I even made like a joke no not a joke but my caption that I posted the other day was um I might be a little high maintenance but I'm self-maintained and it's like I am like I don't know I don't know why anyone like I knew what marriage I was getting into everyone's like she was a gold jerk she was a gold digger I'm sorry but like say it do you know what I mean like I'm not gonna you're doing I'm not giving you a headline but like let me tell you like I'm hello like I married for love you know um and so I'm like it's like let's just put her thinking caps on for two seconds if I married for money like I probably wouldn't have gone on love is blind like you know I would have clocked I'm just like I'm sorry like I don't want to be you know but everyone painted like all she has money she's so hyma and she's blah blah blah and I just I have always maintained myself I've never had a man pay my bill um I take very good care of myself I've worked since I was 15 years old like I had two jobs throughout high school like I'm a very hard worker and I don't know where that got lost in the sauce my dad might have money first of all he did not have that money when I was growing up um and number two my dad's cheap as fuck like are you kidding me like actually my dad's so nice now that I'm that I'm divorced that he finally pays for like my dinner now like um before he'd be like literally and now I'm like you know how teaching financially tell me I'm poor I'm divorced um so it's just I don't know it's just like very very interesting to me that people have that viewpoint of me um but no I I don't necessarily need gifts I just I just want to be I just want to feel loved and I want to like I don't know I want to wake up in the morning and I want like simple things like I I just knew that I would ask for like what I felt was like the bare minimum like flowers occasionally and I want coffee in bed occasionally and just like little things and it's just you know if someone's not capable of doing something and you know whatever and but I also had the mindset of like if if he wanted to he would and so it's like but it's kind of it it's like it that's I get it but it's also like if that's just not someone's personality if it literally just doesn't cross their mind to do something you can't necessarily hold them accountable for that. And that was tough for me to like understand because I was like what it is it me like is it like when you hear that if he wanted to he would well then it kind of puts it on me like well that do I not deserve these things that I want these very like what you can what I consider to be bare minimum like am I not deserving of that you know you know but I do believe that he loved me. I just don't think that that was just the way in which he knew how to love you know and I you know and I you can't get mad at someone for that if it's something's literally not crossing their mind to do something you can't get mad at them for it but I do I do believe first of all I call that being emotionally constipated.

SPEAKER_02

Like I feel like sure you can un you can completely understand the way that that person's been brought up and like oh maybe their family's not like that maybe you know something happened in their past where they just feel like really closed off and like you completely understand that and and that's loving somebody for exactly who they are which I know you did and because you you understand okay this person isn't like that but then you convey that and you call and and you and you try to communicate it and you know maybe you go to therapy or maybe you like literally tell them like A B and C like buy me flowers on Sunday at 3 p.m okay like and so and then if they don't do it and then and it's just kind of like really like that's I'm just asking for this one thing.

SPEAKER_05

And so that's well but then that's the part that kind of sucks when you're having to ask for it even though like you have but when you haven't to like repeatedly ask for something it's kind of but then if they do it no yeah for sure but no for sure but I don't know I felt like for me I asking for something repeatedly sucked you know and then I'm like okay well now I feel like a fucking loser actually I and I used to say that like I feel like a loser now and it's okay it's truly there's no like and I don't again I don't mean it like in whatever way it's not like a this isn't an attack on anybody it's just it's truly just sharing like I'm not attacking him and being telling that he's emotionally constipated.

SPEAKER_02

That's just what I call it like I mean yeah you know you want that ass grab in the middle of the grocery store.

SPEAKER_05

Yes period period you do no you do I mean and and some women aren't like that and right I don't know why but it's very true but some women aren't like that and and I feel like then that makes sense for that person. Exactly I want my ass grabbed I absolutely do. I want I I like I I want to feel it all the time and I don't ever want to like question if it's there. I want to I just want to be loved out loud and so that's and that's something I've learned in this relationship and so now I know going into another relationship you know wherever that looks like I mean it honestly sounds so shitty but like my ideal situation would be like a situation ship right now just come over every other weekend when I don't have baby don't really talk to me between I just want someone there to like you know love on you keep keep me warm at night. Yeah that's it and then you know but like don't do it with anyone else like I need my comedian I need a monogamous situation ship yes yes that's exactly I just need like a really busy working man that's like I don't have time for whatever okay but every other weekend drink to that we need a monogamous situation ship that's what we want yes he is yeah that's what I need you were that man oh no you were not monogamous I will have to run into that one you fled yeah I was I'm a retired fuck boy yeah so that's kind of I'm not mad at it but I do like that he's experienced 100% yeah so I've been and just this time but it's turned into uh talking about that's like what just happened well I'm just saying because like I've experienced different I I wasn't too serious one serious relationship before my love is blind uh relationship and that prior relationship was five and a half years like first loves everything and and there was something in the back of my mind being like oh my god if I marry this man there will always be something there that like we were each other's first everything and like will he ever get curious will he ever you know want to experience something else even though I'm the best he'll ever have period um that's always a possibility you know curiosity killed the cat and so I think I always think everything's divine timing and everything like that and so if I didn't have that relationship prior to Blake maybe I would be like well the fun you know I don't care like if anything I do I just appreciate that he had a past as long as he's clean happens he's clean he's beautiful he's respectful like I'm I'm happy like this everyone you know there's a lid for every pot I always say and this is my lid and I just like oh retired fuckboys make the best husbands I don't know like there you go there you go okay moving on obviously your fellow castmate season three Colleen also recently went through a divorce have you guys found a way to support each other what does that kind of look like you guys yeah it's it's yeah no I mean I love her it's uh her and I will always and I mean I was literally with her this last weekend we had a little staycation together she's my girl we will always have um we went through that experience together and you know being married and then being divorced together we just have a certain you know just going through the super random thing that you know like I mean you and I connect so much because we went on swing you know it's such a different experience but going through that you just it's like a sisterhood you know it's a sorority yeah yeah it's a sorority fraternity and all the it's you know not many people understand it and then yeah I mean I love to see her thriving she's doing her thing and um yeah so it's she's she's do you guys have girls' nights yes we do we do it's a white nights yeah so oh man I wish I lived in Dallas yeah it's fun because now now living back in Dallas like she'll come over we'll do sushi nights and hang out and she's she's she's doing her thing she's like telling me stories and like I don't know she'll be like let's go make out tonight and not like with each other but like let's go and I'm like um like I should this well this was the a little earlier on in the stage of divorce I was like we're just not on the same level right yet you know and and but now I feel like it's just a little different yeah a little different good we love a good supportive friendship yeah especially Colleen is this one of those friends is just down for whatever like if you're like we're gonna stay in and have sushi and drink wine she's that friend uh let's go do something fun like with Vienna she's down it let's go get super fucked up like you know whatever tonight you know she's she's that friend and it's I mean I've known her for you know five years but I feel like I've lived so many lives over the last five years so you know since being married um and yeah so it's it's always fun to have a friend like that.

SPEAKER_06

So going through this process not only you know love is blind and then the marriage and and now the divorce what has that taught you do you think about love and marriage? Like where how do you looking down the road how are you going to approach love you know moving forward um you know it's it's so interesting you just never know what's gonna happen in life.

SPEAKER_05

Like I mean there's people that have been dating for nine years ten years get married divorce after a year then there's people who get married really fast and I've been together for 50 years. Like you just don't know what is going to happen. I think that in my next hopefully if I ever get married again it would be that that person understands that marriage is work and that there's gonna be times that you know whatever and we're two human beings just doing our best and we're figuring out life but that we're on each other's team at the end of the day and that we both want to work towards something together and that we both want it and that we both have each other's backs. And um I don't know how you find that I think you find that you know through life but I mean you just truly there's no way of knowing anything you hope for the best. Obviously I didn't get married to ever get a divorce that's never what I wanted to do. Um but it it happens life just happens the way you know you just you truly never know what's gonna happen in life and you can't what they say when you make plans God laughs and so I'm just right now I'm just I I've done it all. I've done what society told me to do I got married I had the kid I got a divorce but you know I did it the you know I did skip if skip a few chapters and maybe that's where it came back and bit me in the ass is they're like you know you're supposed to date a little bit between but that's fine. Um we did for like nine days. Um but I think that now I'm just gonna live my life like I've I I have my I've always wanted to be a mom and I've that was my ultimate goal in life was to be a mom and I am that and so now I just kind of I feel like it kind of takes the pressure off of everything else because I've done the marriage thing I'm doing the mom thing and so now it's just wherever life takes me is kind of where I want to go and um I don't feel that pressure from society to like now get married and settle down I fucking did that. Okay. You know but I'm also not starting from square one. I'm starting like I have so much knowledge now and what it takes you know love is truly not enough for a marriage to work. It's there's so much more that goes into it and um and yeah so we'll see what happens. I'm honestly the thought of dating makes me want to like puke like asking somebody what their favorite fucking color is like I gotta go. So I don't know how I'm gonna do it but you know when it happens it happens I can't also imagine myself in like a dating app and swiping like that sounds miserable.

SPEAKER_06

One of the reasons I think about well obviously a lot of different reasons but literally dating again sounds exhausting.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah like I'm just you know what I mean but what is it like crowdsourcing it's just like that's what I need I want crowdsourcing like all at once kind of thing I'm like I want other people to find me eligible men. So the bachelorette so I need tall dark handsome Jewish um which is hard tall and Jewish don't really go hand on hand um but you know I'm being flirty um and that's been fun I've met some fun people um he's gonna hear all right I'm just learning not to stress about it and if whatever happens happens and I think that's a transition we got a little game for you.

SPEAKER_06

Oh shit okay with Colleen I think you might know where we're going with this it's called shoot your shot so oh shit there is a guy now wait no I can't DM him but there's a guy that I have a crush on wait okay I do and I found him on Instagram and um he lives in New York oh so this is just we called them we call them wildlings so he's not part of reality so he's a wildling okay I don't even know if he's in a relationship um but he's so fine oh my god's my phone we have to at least do a D we're gonna have to DM him but we might have to do a deep dive okay well no he's fine and I was like okay so okay so what you're saying is he's not the type to like screenshot it and like tell other reality TV friends.

SPEAKER_05

He's just a wildling so what what do we have to lose okay fuck it let's do it um what do I say I need a sh I need a shot I don't know how good at these you want a shot wait let's do it cheerful let's do our shot baby girl oh my god so we're gonna have to somehow let our well we just on socials we'll let them know if it if it worked or not so what do we say we say uh I would be like I would just be like hey I saw you uh oh fuck me oh man I'm so about to practice it's not anymore say that hey fuck me I'm just gonna don't hi blank what are your thoughts on women making the first move no emotions you're like well duh am I gonna send like nothing crying emotion the wink the wink the side spot little kissy okay

SPEAKER_03

Two for two, baby.

SPEAKER_06

I'm gonna have to keep the people updated on how this went happening.

SPEAKER_02

I love it. I'm gonna be at the wedding sleeping over tonight, so I'm gonna be like, No, see, colleagues would be all pissed off now when he's your date to the wedding and she doesn't.

SPEAKER_05

Well, no, I already have a date for the wedding.

SPEAKER_06

That's right, that's true. He's gonna be there. Your friend. He's gonna be there. Well, he's gonna be sitting next to us. I got you, I got you.

SPEAKER_05

I'm gonna see on his lap on that one. That's in his lap. Just put your guys' names. You should tell them the name tags on the same chair. Hey, babe, there was a mix-up. We actually have both of your names on the same chair. Same dessert chair.

unknown

What are you gonna do?

SPEAKER_05

I volunteer his tribute.

SPEAKER_02

He should.

SPEAKER_05

She is your dessert. Yay! Okay, so uh Jeannie and I are gonna, we're gonna go make a cocktail now.

SPEAKER_02

We're gonna go.

SPEAKER_05

Uh that'll be the after to this. Maybe he'll respond while we're making a cocktail.

SPEAKER_02

I will literally die.

SPEAKER_06

So what are you looking forward to? Obviously, you're in a good spot. You're excited, you're like happy. Are you looking forward to that DM magazine looking forward to? I'm actually gonna go sit in the background. But like what in the future? Like, how what are you looking forward to now?

SPEAKER_05

Um, I'm so excited for just all of the opportunities um just in life. I am loving traveling right now. I'm so excited for y'all's wedding. I've never been a um where we're going to. Hey, good save. Where we're going to. I've never been. Um, I'm super excited. Um, just creating more memories, and it's just been so fun to like just to book things and do things. Even coming out here, like I don't have to check with anyone on just kind of fun. Like, not like for permission, obviously, but you know, just I just what my schedule looks like and super excited for Miami Swim Week. Um going to that. It'll be my first time, and uh they're with Sports Illustrated, so I'm gonna be chatting some people up. So definitely no tequila shots for me. Well, maybe, maybe they like tequila. I don't know. Maybe I'll bring the tequila shots over to them. But just like meeting people, and it's been so fun, and just continue just I don't know. I kind of I just another shot at life in a different way, and it's I'm just gonna grab it by the balls and just see what happens. That's a spirit.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, we love that. Well, we love you, and you're the best for coming out here for real.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, I adore you guys. So no, we love it.

SPEAKER_02

We're gonna be what are we gonna finish? Well, actually, I messed up. So suegras is like when she's your mother-in-law, like when you're each mother-in-law's or whatever, we're gonna be cuñadas.

SPEAKER_04

Cunadas.

SPEAKER_02

Cunadas with a ñe, cunadas, which is like cantier. Oh, I love it. Yes, canton. Yes, it's giving cunt. Please don't break that out. I love that word. But I love it and I love you, and I'm so excited to see you just in this new chapter of your life, and how you're really just literally grabbing it by the balls in just the most optimistic and beautiful way, and just being such a great role model for your daughter, who one day is going to be my daughter-in-law. Yes. Yes. Um, I love you so much. Thank you so much for coming out here. Please tell them where to see you in your journey.

SPEAKER_05

Alexa, it's it's Alexa Lemieux. Um, that's a question I can. So I'm gonna keep Lemieux. That's been a question I've gotten. My daughter's last name is Lemieux, and so it just makes sense to also keep that and maybe change it if I ever get married again, but for an right now, just to make sense.

SPEAKER_06

It's just another thing you don't really think about. You know what I mean? And it's just but it's just it's so much harder to travel and do certain things when you have a different class.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, I just I I there's also just a part of me that I feel like I've and I haven't, but I feel like I've lost being there for her a hundred percent of the time, you know, like that connection because now I got like documents that say, hey, these are when you can actually see your child at your birth, you know, that you brought into the world. This is when you can see her, but yeah, but so I think it's just like holding that connection, and you know, it's just something I don't want to lose. So yeah, so that's Alexa Lumiew. Um, and you can find me there making some cocktails, doing some things, traveling, hanging out with my babes. So yeah, maybe with my new boyfriend.

SPEAKER_02

The shoot your shot will hopefully turn into something. But this was gorgeous. So much fun. Thank you so much. So much fun. And now we get to go hang out in my house with our baby so everyone be jealous.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, no, you really should be. This thought would be so much fun.

SPEAKER_02

Thank you so much, and love you. And please like, subscribe, share, comment, comment, all the emotion. Nice things. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

And we'll see you guys next week. You said what? No way she said that it's time for these motherfuckers. Listen to me.