Spirit Was In The Room: What Your Loved One Saw When Nobody Else Was Watching

The second most common question I get asked is this. Is my loved one in Spirit proud of me?

And underneath that question is something even more vulnerable. Did they see me? Were they there? Do they know what it actually cost me to make that choice, draw that line, let that thing go?

After ten years of sitting with Spirit the answer is always the same. Spirit was in the room. Spirit was there for every single moment you thought nobody was watching. And pride from the other side does not look like a report card. It looks like a cheerleader who saw the courage underneath every choice you made alone.

In this episode I am sharing three client stories that prove exactly that. Plus something personal about my own relationship with Spirit that I think is going to change the way you think about how close your loved one actually is right now.

Resources

Ready to start building your own language with Spirit? Grab the free guided meditation at jennyshanks.com/discover. Because your intuition is the portal Spirit uses to communicate.

Want to go deeper? Awakening Your Path is Jenny's self paced program designed to help you build your own connection with Spirit and establish a language that is completely yours. www.jennyshanks.com.ayp

Free Resource

Want to start developing your own connection with Spirit but not sure where to begin?

Jenny put together a free guide outlining five ways to develop your intuition. Because the stronger your intuition the clearer the line to Spirit becomes.

Grab it at jennyshanks.com/five

Learn to Connect with Spirit 

Ready to go deeper and build your own connection with Spirit? Awakening Your Path is a self paced program designed specifically to help you develop your own language with Spirit and start receiving clearly on your own.

www.jennyshanks.com/ayp

Connect With Jenny

Website: jennyshanks.com 

Instagram: @spiritual_medium_jenny 

Book a Reading: jennyshanks.com/services

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to Seriously Dead. I'm Jenny Shanks, a spiritual medium, and I talk to dead people for a living. This podcast is your beyond the grave look at what your loved ones in spirit actually want you to know. And spoiler alert, after 10 years of doing this work, here's the truth. Your spirit family wants you to know they're okay and you are too. How do I know? Because the dead are a lot of things, but one thing they're not is quiet. So get comfortable before you press play because we're getting seriously dead with your loved ones in spirit right now. Another common question I get asked before reading, during a reading, and honestly, sometimes after reading, is my loved one in spirit proud of me? And underneath that question is something even more vulnerable. Something most people would not say out loud, even if they could find the words to do it. Did they see me? Were they there? Do they know what it actually cost me to make that choice or draw that line or let go of that thing? Here's what I know after ten years of sitting with Spirit. Spirit was in the room. Spirit was there for every single moment you thought nobody was watching. The quiet decisions, the hard choices, the things you did alone in a car or a kitchen or a quiet room at the end of a long day that you never got to tell anyone about. Spirit saw it all. And pride from the other side does not look like a report card. It does not come with conditions or a list of things that still need to be done better. It looks like a cheerleader who was present for every moment you thought went unnoticed, who saw the courage underneath the choice, the love underneath the boundary, the freedom underneath the forgiveness. I have three client stories that prove exactly that today, and something personal that I'll share about my own relationship with spirit that I think you're going to change the way you think about how close your loved one actually is right now. This client came to me who had spent over 30 years in a marriage, five children and lots of grandchildren later, a life that looked exactly the way a life was supposed to look from the outside. But inside that life she was lost. She had known for a long time that the marriage was not working, that the person she had become on the inside of it was not the person she actually was. But leaving felt impossible. Not just because of the children or the years or the logistics of dismantling a life that had taken over three decades to build, but because of her parents. She had been raised in a deeply religious household, and the idea of divorce was not just complicated for her. It felt like failure. Like she would be standing in front of her parents who had already passed and telling them that she had not been able to hold it together. In this reading, her father came through. And what he brought through was not disappointment, not a lecture, not the version of pride that comes with conditions attached. Instead, he told her how much happier she was. He described her life now, the lightness of it, the version of herself she had become since making that choice, that decision to divorce. And then he used a word that made her look at me like you just would not believe it. He called her home her castle. Castle was not a random word. It was the word he had always used for their family home growing up. His word, his private language for the place that was theirs. And he was using it now to tell his daughter that the life she had built for herself, the one she had been so afraid he would judge, was worthy of that same word. She was not living in failure. She was living in her castle, a place that set her free and allowed her to be herself. Spirit that day was in the room when she signed the papers. Spirit saw every moment of that 30 year marriage and every moment of what came after. And what Spirit chose to bring into that reading that day was not judgment. In fact, it was her castle. My next client came to me who had spent years trying to save his older brother. Not from anything dramatic, but from patterns that kept repeating no matter how much support was offered, how many times a hand was extended, how many times this man stopped his own life to walk through a door and try to help his brother. And he was exhausted. Not just from the effort, but from the guilt of knowing he was reaching a point where he could not keep doing it. Because their mother had passed and he was terrified she would be disappointed if he had stopped. If he finally drew a line and said, I love you and I cannot keep doing this. That day his mother came through in the reading. And she did not come through with disappointment. She came through with clarity, the kind of clarity that only exists on the other side of a life fully lived and reviewed. She said to him that day, that was my job, not yours. And then she said something I have thought about many times since that reading. Never close the door. But you don't have to keep opening it and walking through it yourself. That sentence landed in that room like something that had been waiting years to be said. Because that is exactly the distinction he had been unable to make on his own. The difference between keeping a door open in your heart for someone you love and walking through it over and over at the expense of your own life. His mother saw every time he walked through that door, every time it cost him something, every time he did it anyway because he loved her and he loved his brother, and he didn't want to let either of them down. And what she chose to bring through in that reading that day was not a request to keep going, but it was permission to stop. Spirit was in the room for it all, every door, every cost, every moment of love that kept him walking through anyway. And Spirit had been waiting for that exact moment to tell him that was my job, not yours. This client came to me who had been holding on to a friendship that had stopped giving back what she was putting in. Not dramatically, not with a big falling out or a clear moment of betrayal, just the slow accumulation of unmet expectations, of showing up fully and not having them met, of holding on to something that had stopped feeling like it once was. And after years of fighting with her own emotions about it, she made a decision. She let it go. Not with anger, not with confrontation. She just quietly stopped holding on to the expectations that the friendship was going to be something that it had stopped being long, long ago. And in doing so, she felt something she had not expected. She felt free. Her sister came through that day in the reading, and her sister named the entire relationship that she had decided to let go of. She had acknowledged what her sister had done, the decisions that had not looked dramatic from the outside, but it required an enormous amount of internal work to get through. And she told her she was proud of her, not for ending the friendship, but for finally setting herself free from it, for choosing her own peace over the exhaustion of holding on to something that had stopped serving her. Spirit was there for that quiet moment, that one that happened alone, the one nobody else saw or celebrated or even knew about. And Spirit walked into that reading specifically to name it. Because the courage it took her sister to let go quietly, without drama, without vindication, deserved to be witnessed. That is what spirit does. Spirit does not just show up for the big moments. Spirit is there for the quiet ones too. The ones that cost everything and that nobody else ever knew about. These stories prove that spirit is always watching even in the quiet moments when you don't think they are. I had one of the most incredible relationships with my aunt. And to this day, I still think of her not only daily, but multiple times a day. She was someone deeply important to me, and there are so many moments where I wish more than anything that she was here to talk to, to share something with, to hear her voice, to ask her what she thinks. And oftentimes within hours of having that thought, sometimes even less, she comes through. Not in a reading, not in a formal session where I've opened the white doors and ask spirit to come forward, but in my regular life with one of our signs. You heard that right. We have multiple signs. And here's what I want you to understand about that. My aunt and I have built a language together since she passed. Not one sign, but multiple signs, different signs for different messages. One that just simply means hello and I'm here, one that means to call my family, and one that means take action or pay attention, something is coming. That language did not exist the day she passed. It developed over time through paying attention, through acknowledging the signs when they came through, through treating the connection as exactly what it is: a relationship, a living, ongoing, actively communicating relationship between me and my aunt, who just so happens to live in a different dimension now. Here's what that taught me about the question that everyone asks: Is my loved one proud of me? My aunt doesn't wait for me to ask. My aunt shows up within hours of me thinking about her, and sometimes less. Not because I'm a medium, not because I have some special access that other people don't, but because I've learned to pay attention, how to recognize the language, how to keep the conversation going from my side so spirit knows the door is open. Your loved one in spirit is doing the same thing for you right now. Today, in the ordinary moments of your regular life, the sign you brushed off as a coincidence, the memory that surfaced out of nowhere while you were doing something completely unrelated, the feeling that washed over you in a quiet moment that felt like something you're not sure what, that is your loved one in spirit, showing up, checking in, letting you know they are still there. Spirit is not watching from somewhere far away, waiting for a medium to open a channel. Spirit is right next to you. Paying attention to your life, proud of the things you did alone that no one else saw, sending signs that are specific to you because your person knows exactly what to do to get your attention. The relationship didn't end, it just changed forms. And learning to recognize that new form is one of the most profound things you can do for yourself in your own grief and your own healing. So let me pull these stories together because there's one thread running through them all. Pride from spirit does not sound like a grade. It doesn't sound like approval for the choices that made sense on paper or looked right from the outside, or that would have satisfied a human version of an expectation. Pride from spirit sounds like a father calling his daughter's new life a castle when she was afraid he would call it a failure. Pride from spirit sounds like a mother saying that was my job, not yours, to a son who had been carrying her weight alongside his own for years. Pride from spirit sounds like a sister walking into a reading specifically to say, I saw you let it go, and I am so proud of you for it. And pride from spirit sounds like a sign that comes through within hours of a thought, a language built over time between two people who love each other across these dimensions. That is what spirit sees when spirit looks at your life. Not the version that was supposed to happen, but the real version. The one that took courage and love and more strength than you probably gave yourself credit for in the moment. Spirit was in the room for it all. And spirit has never stopped being proud of you. If you walk away from this episode with one thing, let it be this. Your loved one in spirit is still there, still watching, still present for the moments you think nobody sees. The quiet decisions, the hard choices, the things you did alone that cost you everything and that you never got to tell anyone about. Spirit saw it all. And spirit is not grading you against a version of your life that was supposed to look a certain way. Spirit is cheering for the real version, the one that took courage, the one that took love, the one that is uniquely and completely yours. Start paying attention to the signs. Acknowledge them when they come. Talk back. Because the more you show spirit the door is open, the more spirit will walk through it. If this episode landed for you, let's not keep it in the spirit vault. Share it with someone who needs to be reminded that their loved one in spirit is still very much with them. And I would be honored if you'd leave a review wherever you listen to podcasts. And if you're wanting to learn how to connect with your own loved ones in spirit, check out the show notes below for details about my self-paced program called Awakening Your Path. Awakening Your Path is a guide to build your own language with spirit and establish a connection with both of them. I'll be back next week with another episode of Seriously Dead. And until then, stay open, stay curious, and remember, the dead are not quiet. You just have to learn to listen to the city.