Conversations With Myself (and sometimes other people)
Navigating the crises of American millennial life through inner dialogue, character bits, mediocre impressions, the occasional sit down conversation with a real person, and other questionable acts of "creative expression".
Conversations With Myself (and sometimes other people)
"Devlin After Dark" #3 on News Talk Radio AM 690
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"GIVE EM A FEW MORE LOVE TAPS WILL YA, MR. PRESIDENT!"
- Clark Devlin
Good evening, my fellow Americans. I don't have enough time for collars today. There's too much to get to. Besides, we have been infiltrated by our enemies, and I won't allow them to steal precious airtime from the truth coming to you all. New York City is under attack. The Kami Mandani is the Trojan horse we have been warning about for the Marxist Islamic Caliphate. The new face of the Democratic Party. You thought 9-11 was bad. When this is all said and done, it'll be worse than a hundred 9-11s. Only this time I have my doubts about America having a kumbaya moment of emotional unity. The only thing you'll be unified on is you'll all be broke, starving, and bowing prostrate towards Mecca five times a day. This Marxist Islamic Caliphate isn't just an attack from the outside. It's being led from the inside by the fomenting of the woke Reich with the likes of Tucker Katarlson, Maudri Trader Green, and other neo-fascist podcasters like mediocre Meghan Kelly and the little Adolph Nick Fuentes. A total lunatic. These sick twisted people would rather defend Iran and our enemies than our number one ally, Israel. Using your platform and your voice in a way that is openly critical of our patriotic and dear leader President Trump is nothing short of treason. What's next? You're gonna lead protests against our own government and your burkas and hijabs? No kings, you chant. We don't have kings here, you morons! In America, we only got presidents and dopes like you. What you should be doing with your platform is imploring the people of Iran to have courage and rise up against their government. Why is it that the only thing these sick people want to talk about is how we bombed a little girl's school in Iran? That's not the only thing we're bombing. President Trump tells me that the retaliatory strikes against Iranian targets are just a love tap. Give 'em a few more love taps, will ya, Mr. President? It's time the people of Iran rise up against their tyrannical government. But Mr. De Vlin is asking the people of another country to rise up against their government, asking them to commit treason? You can't commit treason when it's against a foreign government, you moron. But Mr. De Vlyn, are Katarlson and little Adolf Wentez living rent free in your head? Tucker Kakarlsen couldn't live rent free in my head. I wouldn't even let him pay me to live in my head. Or should I say let Qatar pay me? These traitors have no morals, no integrity, no soul. Just grifting off however they can to get a bigger audience, including Muslims, and saying the most unhinged, disgusting things to gain a bigger audience for a bigger payday. Clicks over country. It's a disgrace. Mr President, depart these morons. Never has been, never will be. More true today than ever while we are under attack. You really care about America and what it really stands for. And you love your homeland and want to preserve it for your kids and grandkids, please consider supporting our podcast, Coffee with Clark, available on all streaming platforms. If you sign up today, our normal monthly subscription of $4.99 will be cut down to $3.99, lowering prices just like President Trump promised. Supporting Coffee with Clark is one of the best ways to say that you are a real American patriot. Remember, communism is free, but freedom is not. Subscribe today. Tucker Katarlson says President Trump is the Antichrist. He's the Antichrist, you say? Well I'm the anti Reich. This is your new left, people. A bunch of former right wing influencers or so called right wing, showing their true colors now. The new faces of the Democratic Party. The Democrats have always been the fascist. From slavery to the KKK to the new woke right. When King George and the British attempted to bring an Islamic caliphate to the American colonies, the patriots here in our homeland didn't just let them come in with open arms and government funding. They didn't start podcasts talking about how we oughta listen to their side of things and try and see it from their perspective. No! They got off their asses, rolled up their sleeves, and got right to work, sharpening their bayonets and melding ammunition to take the greatest fight in the history of the world against King George and his woke neofascist psychophants. You think Christmas morning is all about being comfortable in your slippers by the fireplace and open up presents and Santa Claus? No. It's about taking boats quietly in the night and slaughtering your enemies. George Washington didn't do it because he wanted to be president. He did it because he was a patriot. When Paul Riviera rode by horseback and used his lantern to warn the colonies that the British were coming, it wasn't because he was doing it for podcast subscribers. He was doing it to protect his homeland. One if by land, two if by sea, and three if by little Adolf Fuentes. Our declaration of independence was so beautifully and perfectly penned by one of the greatest presidents and founders in our history, Thomas Jefferson. We hold these truths to be self-evident that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness, and that any criticism of the future nation-state of Israel shall be immediately punishable by death. Don't take my word for it. Just listen to our founders. These men were absolutely brilliant and God-fearing. If you need further confirmation, just look at the First Amendment of our Constitution. Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof, or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press, or the right of the people peacefully to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances, with the only exception being negative speech regarding the future nation state of Israel, whereas all aforementioned rights shall become immediately no and void. It can't get any more clear than that, folks. If you are anti-Israel, then you are anti-America, and a traitor to our country. I say if anyone is found to be an anti-Semite, or say anything critical about the nation state of Israel, to be given the death penalty by firing squad. Just as our founders intended. But Mr. De Vlyn, didn't our founders believe in our right, as Americans, to peacefully protest? Do I need to read the First Amendment to you again, you big dope? Do you purple-haired Gen Z, Moxus, Islamists, even know how to read? What are they teaching these dopes in public schools these days, anyways? It's about time we ended the Department of Education. You don't need a public education. You need to read your constitution. And just be grateful that we have the greatest American president of our nation's history guiding us right now through our most perilous fight yet. And you want to listen to that lunatic, little Adolf Wentes. Ronald Reagan is rolling around in his grave right now. Easily our second greatest president. He single-handedly defeated communism against the Soviet Union. And now all these purple-haired dopes, with the help of the woke right fascist podcasters, want to bring it back. It's a disgrace.