Episode 35 - Runnin

Sometimes you have to stop waiting for the right moment and start moving toward it. This episode is about chasing purpose — not pacing yourself for comfort, but trusting every step even when the path isn’t clear. When you run with intent, the direction becomes the destination.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:01

I've been running and running and running pretty much my whole life. For the early part, you could say that I was running from problems, issues, confrontation, you know, stuff like that. Um, once I had my suicide attempt and, you know, had time to get my mind right, you know, I wasn't running from problems anymore, wasn't scared of problems, wasn't scared of issues, wasn't scared of confrontation.

SPEAKER_01 0:30

Thing I was running towards my purpose. I was running towards my purpose.

SPEAKER_00 0:36

So, you know, even when I was in the military, I found purpose in volunteering and being a service to others. I loved it. Because for a brief moment in time, you don't have to worry about yourself or anything that you're doing. You get to help someone else have a good day. So to me, that was amazing. That was the best part. So I enjoyed it. And then, you know, once I got out of the military, um, my purpose kind of shifted. I wanted to get my mind right and get well mentally. And then I met my wife and, you know, I found my purpose again. And this time it was to, you know, do what I can to make sure she was happy, make sure she was taken care of. And you say, you know, like, how did you get to a point where you found your purpose? How did you find your purpose?

SPEAKER_01 1:25

I did it by following my instincts.

SPEAKER_00 1:29

I got out the military and uh went back to Texas for those two months, and I just knew I don't belong here.

SPEAKER_01 1:37

It's not where I belong, it's not where I'm supposed to be. So I moved to California. By the third month, I moved to California by that March. Because I got back to Texas that January.

SPEAKER_00 1:51

I finished my Do Stay Less album in February, and I left uh California. Uh it might have even been March 1st. I can't even remember, but it was definitely March. So from then on, you know, I pretty much coasted for the most part and just worked my 9 to 5, went home, chilled.

SPEAKER_01 2:11

And then um, you know, I met my wife, my son B wife, and then that's where I found my purpose to do what I can to make sure she's taken care of and she's happy.

SPEAKER_00 2:23

And honestly, I've always wanted to be able to add a responsibility to take care of others and make sure others are okay. You know, when I was in Japan, it was pretty much everybody that I held volunteer for, whether it was the Red Cross, whether it was just a really local organization, even, you know, a Japanese organization, I didn't care about anything other than everybody having a good experience. And then, you know, it was also just taking care of my mom to make sure she was okay. You know, I paid her mortgage, so I was trying to take care of bills for her so she could be good. And then, you know, once I got out, it shifted from, you know, because first I had to focus on taking care of myself. That was my main purpose. At that point in time, I was wanting to take care of myself mentally, get myself in a good space so you know I can prepare to, you know, just be in the world and just live peacefully and chill, you know. So I did that. And then, you know, I met my wife, and you know, something miraculous happened. The gears started to shift, and I felt that uh urge to stop being an underachiever again and trying hard to make sure I do everything I can to make sure that we're okay.

SPEAKER_01 3:36

So that's when I went back to school.

SPEAKER_00 3:42

That's when I got well actually I got the overnight job at manufacturing, and then I was also a basketball coach. And really the basketball coach was just a passion project. I just loved basketball. And I just got to the point to where you know I didn't really want to play basketball anymore. I just wanted to teach everything that I've learned. So that's where I was at. I um taught basketball and coached, and then also uh uh had my regular job. And then, you know, once that happened, you know, I started getting better paying jobs, and eventually that shifted into uh me eventually going back to school so I can get better paying jobs again. Because in California you can work in manufacturing and get good paying jobs even if you don't have a degree. But umce we moved to California, it was kind of hard to find a good paying job that's not government where you don't need a degree. So, you know, I had to focus on getting that degree and trying to do what I can to make sure my family is okay. And then you say, How do you find your purpose, or how like how do you even get to that point? And honestly, you just gotta follow your instincts. When I went to Texas, I knew I didn't need to be there. My instincts were telling me I need to be where I feel happy, where I feel peace, where I love the atmosphere. And it was California. So that's what I did. I moved. You gotta find your purpose by taking a leap of faith. What's the point of waiting? Just make a plan, work that plan, and work it all out from there. Everything's not gonna be perfect. When I had the plan to move us to Maryland and do this government job, did I know I was gonna end up getting laid off six months later?

unknown 5:25

No.

SPEAKER_00 5:26

I didn't plan for that. I just knew I wanted to take care of her and make more money so we can live more comfortably. So in the end, what happened is I ended up adjusting, found a new job with a lower paying drastically so. But it was a job. So I made it work. And then eventually, what happened? I finished my degree, got promoted, made a little more money, and moved us into a house. Like, you can have a plan for how you want to do things, but life doesn't work that way. There's always gonna be a fork in a road, there's always gonna be friction, there's always gonna be something that makes it uncomfortable and makes it to where you know, I wouldn't say that your goal is in jeopardy, but that it's gonna be a little more harder to attain. So you're gonna have to pivot. And the thing is about purpose. Once you find your purpose and you know what your purpose is, it doesn't matter what the obstacle is, you're gonna find a way to make it work because you know that that's where you belong.

SPEAKER_01 6:25

Now who doesn't want to be where they belong? You know, so the way I see it, you do what you can and focus on what you control and go from there.

SPEAKER_00 6:36

There's always gonna be some random roadblock that's gonna try to stop you. But in the end, the only person that can stop you is you.

SPEAKER_01 6:43

You have to find a way to make it work. And you can. You just gotta research and brainstorm, and that's it. Eventually you'll find something. I'm juice gas on. This is running, and this is our reset.