Modesty is Godliness with Hannah Forman

Featuring special guest, Hannah Forman, this episode invites you into a thoughtful conversation about modesty and what it truly means for us as women of God. We talk openly about how the way we dress should reflect our identity in Christ, allowing the right kind of beauty—one rooted in faith, character, and purpose—to lead.

In this episode, we also share real survey results straight from the source, with men answering honest questions about their thoughts on what women wear. These candid responses help spark meaningful dialogue and bring awareness to why it’s important to be mindful of how we clothe ourselves.

This isn’t about rules or restriction—it’s about alignment. Aligning our hearts, our choices, and our outward appearance with who we are in Christ and the message we carry. Join us for an honest and eye-opening conversation that encourages reflection, wisdom, and intentional living.

***Listener discretion advised: this podcast is NOT for little ears!

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:07

Welcome to My Father's Business Podcast, where we explore our divine purpose and identity in Christ. I'm your host, Lindsay Cope, and I'm about my father's business, seeking to live a purpose-driven life. In each episode, we'll discuss various topics that connect to God's will. Just as Jesus devoted himself to his father's business, we'll see how understanding our identity in him helps us navigate life. So join me on this journey of discovering how to align our lives with God's plan and fulfill our unique God-given destinies. I wanted this podcast to be a little more conversational, still centered around our identity in Christ and all things my father's business. But I'm going to start having special guests come onto the show. And before I introduce the topic, I want to introduce our special guest for today, who is a dear friend of mine, a kingdom wife, a mother of three littles under the age of nine. Eight. Eight.

SPEAKER_02 1:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:19

The youngest is eight. Or the oldest is eight. She is an ambassador of Christ, and I honor and love her very much. We have Hannah Foreman on the show with us today. Welcome, Hannah.

SPEAKER_00 1:30

Thanks for having me. I love you too.

SPEAKER_01 1:33

So glad to have you. So Hannah and I, we have this special friendship that you never have the type of friend that you just look at and you just laugh. You just know what they're thinking. We laugh so much. It's like we have this kindred connection and we just know what the others think, and sometimes we'll just bust out laughing about nothing and we laugh a lot. So just know that that might happen during this podcast. So we hope that she can laugh with us. But Hannah's, she's so passionate about this topic. She's just as passionate about it as I am. And we're going to be talking about the importance of modesty because modesty is godliness. So I recently conducted a survey about modesty with real men. And I'm so excited to show you these results because it's so eye-opening. And this is a diverse group of men from all ages, backgrounds, all walks of life, married men, divorced men, singled men. And I did this because I wanted us to hear honest, unfiltered perspectives straight from the source, not just assumptions or stereotypes, but I wanted us to get a real view of it from the man's perspective. So we're going to dive into this, but first, I want to say, I want to let the audience know that we're going to talk about some hard truths today. And it's not about shaming anyone. It's simply to give us a clearer understanding of how men actually think when it comes to the way we dress and the way we present ourselves. And hey, maybe this might bring some conviction and some correction, but that's just what God's word does. It teaches, it rebukes, it corrects. So just know that this is not condemnation, but you might feel some conviction in this. And and that we we hope you do, because our yes, our um objective here is to bring some awareness because we know God's word says, My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge. And we want to give them the knowledge straight from the source. So, Hannah, first let's just talk about why we're passionate about this topic. If you could just kind of speak into how this first really became something that either bothered you or created a passion for you to bring correction in this area.

SPEAKER_00 3:42

Man, that is such a broad, this is such a broad discussion. Ugh, I can go down like 50 rabbit trails with this. It's wild. Um, I did grow up in a spirit-filled home. Every girl dreams about, you know, that princess fairy tale wedding, you know, the prince swooping up the princess. I grew up watching Disney, which I mean, real life, it's not a fairy tale. It's really not. But it can it can be like that, really. It can. So whenever I got into we'll just say the dating world, I learned there's heartbreak that comes with it all.

SPEAKER_01 4:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 4:17

And there's infidelity. Um, nothing, it's they leave out that part in the movie scene. Um a lot of that led to insecurity and rejection. My previous marriage that I was in before the amazing one that I have now, I thought that this man was was it for me because he just looked at me like I was just God's gift to earth. And it was honestly, before we got married, I should have saw the red flags then. Um, this man well, excuse me, he wasn't a man, he was more of a boy. Yeah, I get that.

SPEAKER_01 4:57

Uh and so I mean let me ask you this. Did you know that he struggled with lust? Let's just go ahead and say that dirty word that we haven't said yet. Lust. Oh man. That's what we're dealing with here. That is the sin that we are dealing with here, and that's why it's so important to be modest as godly women. And we're gonna get into that because we're going to read these results from these men that may or may not currently struggle with lust that can tell you what makes them struggle, and it's the way we we dress. Right. So, when did you first recognize that the man that was unfaithful in your marriage struggled with lust? Oh, let's see.

SPEAKER_00 5:41

I was okay, we're in the day and age of um technology, so anything is visible. And I was a bit of a creeper then, like I would go on his Facebook or you know, any social media. I mean, yeah, like if I didn't, I wouldn't have known. And uh I thought, you know, I had this built up in my head, everything's gonna be perfect. Everything, well, it doesn't matter, even if he's not struggling with the list, nothing is ever gonna be perfect.

SPEAKER_01 6:10

And you probably had just an inkling, you had something in your spirit, the whole spirit telling you something was off.

SPEAKER_00 6:17

Yeah, and I continuously would see stuff, like you know, girls that he was following, um, liking things. Like I went deep in the rabbit hole of like looking. Yeah, I'm glad I did. Um, but I but my fault is I, you know, I did let myself stay in that position because I was so down on myself, but I'm like, I'm not gonna get any better than this. Like he he thinks I'm pretty. So obviously there's something here. It was it was a mess. Like I created like there was just a soul tie, like an ungodly soul tie already created before we got married. And it was so toxic. And we got I I discovered he was into all this, like I mean, I know we're getting real about it, but it was just like these scantily clad girls, they were wearing basically like thongs and stuff in the pictures and like or nothing at all. Oh yeah, just completely just bare butt naked. Let's just get real. It was just gross. Really, it was so nasty.

SPEAKER_01 7:23

I'm thinking, but I don't want to look like this, but obviously, if I need to, you know, maybe I need to exercise more and get a bigger butt, or you know, like maybe I should try questioning yourself, and yeah, that's where the rejection sinks in. Hey, I think we could do a whole nother podcast on rejection and how that roots, where it begins, and how you uproot it and get your freedom. But thank the Lord, you are free now. Praise God. You have been set free from all of that, but you are passionate about this topic because of what you've seen and what you've been through and how you've faced rejection because lust has worked its way, you know, into your life and into a previous marriage and destroyed it. And that's what the enemy seeks to do still, kill, and destroy. And one of the primary ways that he destroys our men is through lust.

SPEAKER_00 8:14

Yeah, it it it's like a pinball machine, it bounces off, you know, lust doesn't just affect the men, it affects everyone around them.

SPEAKER_01 8:21

Yes. Uh and women can fall prey to the same thing. Oh, absolutely, absolutely. Um, so let's dive into the scripture that tells us a little bit about modesty.

SPEAKER_00 8:37

So I have a couple of scriptures written down. So the first one I have it is First Timothy 2, 9 through 10. And that's the NLT. It says, and I want women to be modest in their appearance, and they should wear decent and appropriate clothing, but not to draw attention to themselves by the way they fix their hair or by wearing gold or pearls or expensive clothes. For women who claim to be devoted to God, should make themselves attractive by the good things they do. I don't think like they're literally I mean, I in a way they are saying don't wear so much, don't accentuate so much that it uh overshadows um the good um the or the Holy Spirit, as I should say, inside of you. You want to accentuate uh what the Lord already gave you. It's like wearing makeup. You know, you don't want I mean, let's just be honest, you don't want to look like a drag queen and you put makeup on. And that is the trend now. It's the trend now is to overdo it. Yeah. Because you know, the in the way here in the world, a lot of women, they uh it's like they're so hollow on the inside because there's no Holy Spirit there. And so when you have when you're full of the Lord, you don't have to put on so much because you're already glowing.

SPEAKER_01 9:54

Yeah. So yeah. What I see here is that God isn't against beauty and style or creativity and um, you know, adorning yourself with with modesty, he simply wants our character to shine brighter than our outfit. Amen. He's more concerned that um we have a Christ-centered heart, which is more attractive than anything we could ever wear. That's so good.

SPEAKER_00 10:18

That's so good. So I have another verse to add with that, and that is uh 1 Peter chapter 3, verses 3 and 4. And these are all of NLT, by the way. So this says, don't be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry or beautiful clothes. Verse 4 says, You should clothe yourself instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God. And what I get out of this is before I dress my body, I dress my heart.

SPEAKER_01 10:56

That's so good. Yeah. You know, a lot of these women that are out here dressing provocatively and and persuasive and suggestive clothing have a heart condition.

SPEAKER_00 11:09

There, there's a heart problem, right? And I do believe, and this is this can stem off to a whole nother conversation, but a lot of that stems off of um the spirit of rejection. Yes, and so many women, and it's not just women, men also can deal with this as well, but it's mainly attacking women. And this might not be for you know to every woman, but a lot of it comes from the beginning of their lives, if you know, if their father, you know, was a godly man in their life. And a lot of I mean, I I can even speak for myself. I dealt with this growing up, um, not in the most ideal situation with my biological father. Um, I had a great man, I had a couple of men in my life that were spiritual leaders to me, but I still had that longing in my heart because this man, you know, I was created from him. And so I longed to be loved in that way, and I was quiet, it's almost like I I secretly was wanting to just like get more attention from that male gender, and I just I grew up in a house where it it was talked about being modest, but I still I I tried to get that attention from other men, and like with my past marriage stuff that I dealt with, I was always trying to get his attention. He wasn't living the godly life, but yeah, I I can honestly say that what I prayed for and who I was praying for to be my husband, he wasn't looking towards the outward. He he saw the inside first. I mean, clearly he liked what he saw on the outside. You know, obviously we got married. So praise the Lord.

SPEAKER_01 13:06

Absolutely. That was just an added bonus because he saw the internal. That's right. Yes, there you go. A man that's looking for a good godly woman is going to seek to see how he can add value to the value that's already in her.

SPEAKER_00 13:20

Right. Oh my gosh. Yes, he clothes me every day in prayer. Yes. I honestly I didn't know what to do with that. Yeah, I didn't know what to do with that. I'm like, oh my gosh, I literally don't have to put on all this makeup all the time to get this man to look at me. Yes. So it's great.

SPEAKER_01 13:37

He sees your inner beauty. Yes. That's the way it should be.

SPEAKER_00 13:40

Yes, Christian girls have more fun. Yes, they do.

SPEAKER_02 13:45

Praise the Lord.

SPEAKER_00 13:46

Honestly, what I was gonna say was that I needed to become what I was praying for. Like, we're first off, we're daughters, we're daughters of the king first for anything. Um, but then you need to walk around with a wife mindset. Yes, don't be walking around with a spirit or girlfriend, because then you're just gonna get used, abused, and thrown around.

SPEAKER_02 14:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:07

And as a wife, you know, a mindset of a wife, um, I have actually right here, and it kind of falls into it, it's Proverbs 31-25. And this is a very well-known piece of scripture. It's she is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future. So where it says she's clothed with strength and dignity, I mean, I know that sounds cliche, but I find my confidence in the Holy Spirit. I mean, there's so many times where I will get so insecure, everybody gets insecure, but insecurity is a deep, deep thing that always tries to come for me every single time. But I became what I prayed for. And I prayed that the Lord would send me a man that was not struggling with the you know, with the I mean, every man either is struggling with it or they have overcome it. Absolutely. You can't there's no way around it.

SPEAKER_01 15:03

So you know, it's kind of wild because the women putting themselves out there with lustful content are more insecure than the victims of that betrayal from husbands, boyfriends, whatever, whoever it may be. You know, and it's like this vicious cycle, and then we all just become insecure through it all. Oh my gosh, you know, but we're insecure because he's looking at her, he's looking at this other insecure girl.

SPEAKER_00 15:31

Yeah, it's like broken telephone, it's like it's like a never-ending yeah, yeah, absolutely. It's wild man.

SPEAKER_01 15:38

Okay, you had one more scripture that you wanted to share on what God cares about most being the heart.

SPEAKER_00 15:45

And that is see, Proverbs 31, 30. And that says, Charm is deceptive and beauty does not last, but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.

SPEAKER_01 15:59

Yes, there is nothing more attractive than a woman that fears the Lord. I mean, I can tell you that from a man's perspective, you know. Um I've had men comment, and not that I praise for the attention of men, but I've had um men comment when they see me praise the Lord and just say how how much they they appreciated that and how attractive that is. Um, so when women think, and and it's also are you attracting the right man? You know, depending on what man you are trying to attract, lustful content may or may not be what they want to see. Right. Um, depends on who they're chasing, you know, are they chasing God or are they chasing their lust?

SPEAKER_00 16:41

That's right. And whenever those men who are in the right frame of mind, they may not be for you, but they see you and they're like, wow, that is an attractive quality to have. And that gives you hope. And you're like, wow, how much more is the husband I'm praying for, how much more is that going to be attractive to him? Yeah, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01 16:58

Yes, yes. Yeah, like there is the scripture. Um, who he who finds a good wife has found a good thing.

SPEAKER_00 17:07

Yes, I love that one.

SPEAKER_01 17:09

All throughout people's heart, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 17:11

I throw that. I'm like, I mean, you found a good thing. So, you know, my name is Hannah. You're right. Quit complaining. My name's Hannah. It means it's one of the meanings is you know, God's favor. And I always joke on DJ. Remind him that you're not gonna be able to do it. I'm like, you found favor. Yeah, good thing.

SPEAKER_01 17:26

Don't forget, don't neglect that good thing. There you go. And you know, it goes back to what you said earlier about before I dress my body, I dress my heart. You know, that's so important to make sure that we are checking our heart condition. Yes. And um, some of this I shared in the previous podcast when I spoke into competition and um where our heart is and how we feel about ourselves, you know, when our heart is right and we can cut away those things that are not pleasing to the Lord, but we feel our value, we see our value, we know our value when our hearts are aligned with him.

SPEAKER_00 18:06

Wow. That's so, so good, Lindsay. So my very last piece of scripture that I have. This one is Proverbs 1122. And it says, A beautiful woman who lacks discretion is like a gold ring in a pig's snout. Oh, that's ugly. That ain't blood. That's ugly, right? You can see look, you can dress up anything ugly, and it's still gonna be that ugly thing.

SPEAKER_01 18:38

So I saw two girls over the weekend, one going into the gas station with these biker shorts on, the ones that have like the singed booty crack, like what is it called? And she was wearing a sports bra with that. So I mean it's a little thing anymore to dress all just wear a swimsuit into the gas station. And let's not even get started on swimsuits. Like, modest swimsuits have been a challenge for me this year, but I found some really, really cute. Like, yeah, and so some people make a fun. My daughter's like, You have a body to wear a bikini, do not wear that. I'm like, that is exactly why I am not wearing a bikini because my body belongs to my future husband, and I don't want anybody else seeing it. So come on, you know, but anyway, so that it just it's heartbreaking for me because they lack the knowledge of what they're doing and how they're tempting men. And a lot of women will say, especially young women, well, that's not my problem, that's their problem. They have a less problem. That is maybe you need to check your heart because I think you have a heart problem. You know, we don't drink a margarita in front of an alcoholic. Same thing. Why are you going to dress provocatively or suggestive in front of a man when you know men? And here's the thing my people are destroyed for lack of knowledge. Here we are again. That's why it's so important that we get this message out there. And I taught this in my discipleship class not long ago, and it was so eye-opening for these young girls, and they have thought twice about what they put on in the mornings. Ignorance is not bliss, I'm gonna tell you. Yeah, but but here's the thing when you're brought up that way and you know nothing different, you know, we were raised in Christian homes. I mean, somewhat, I mean, sure. Um I still was living on the wild side, and you know, there may be some people that are listening to this and saying you you ain't got room to talk because I've seen your photos before, but you know what? I am a new person, I am a new creation in Christ. I am not that old person that I was, and yes, I used to do these very things, and that's why I know it's so important to to cleanse your heart and ask the Lord to search your heart because that was my problem. I was suffering from rejection, I didn't know who I was, I didn't know my identity in Christ. I didn't know my value. And I was seeking attention in any way I could possibly get it. So I was that person that put out bikini photos on Facebook. I was the one seeking validation in all the wrong places. I was that girl that was, you know, constantly checking to see how much attention I got from that and and who I got it from. And you know, it left me empty inside.

SPEAKER_00 21:29

Right. And those same exact women that you know so desperately post content like that, they wonder why they don't have a husband. I'm just trying to find a good guy. And the same ones that say that are the ones that say, Yes, girl, slay, slay. Like this, I'm I'm like, seriously, you're not supporting each other. This this whole women supporting women movement. I'm like, this is a joke. This is a whole joke to me because you you ain't supporting. I'm gonna be honest and real about this. You're what you're doing is taking. Taking each other by the hand and you're leading each other down that widespread road and going to hill. And that's what I don't like to see. Wear what you feel good in. Oh my gosh. It makes me sad for them because it does. I'm like, you have no idea how much joy you would feel if you only knew. If you only could see yourself that Christ could bring.

SPEAKER_01 22:25

Yeah. Yeah. That's so good. I heard something recently that said the way we dress communicates something before we ever speak. And you and I, before we started this podcast, were talking about how um men are reading that. They're picking up on that.

SPEAKER_00 22:42

Let's see. This is what my husband, this came from a man's point of view. It was men are visual and they filter thoughts through a visual lens more than an emotional. But what they can see determines what they think and feel. And women need to be mindful of that. That's good. That's so good.

SPEAKER_01 23:01

You know, and that goes back to how women will uh sometimes say, well, it's a man's problem if he can't keep his eyes off of me and can't keep his eyes from thinking lustful thoughts. Well, men are visual, and it it's innate, it's in them.

SPEAKER_00 23:18

Yeah, and I mean, why do you think a lot of uh and Netflix is awful? I mean, not just Netflix, HBO is really bad about this too. A lot of the shows, I mean, they're geared towards men, men audience, because there's nothing but nudity. Like you might as well just put on a full-on pornographic film. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 23:39

And now, you know, we're appealing to women with 50 shades of gray, and there's a billboard of a show. I was maybe at the casino, but it's like 12 men with no shirts on, and it's everywhere around town. You know, they've got six packs, and so now we're luring in the women, and the women are thinking lustfully, and you know, I don't know how many men are okay with that. They don't suffer with the rejection and the sensitivity like we do when it comes to you know, our spouses or significant other um being tempted in that way, but um, it's a problem and it's not okay. We should be um devoted to our spouse, devoted to um our significant other, and honor that commitment and that covenant that we made with that one person. And if you're single, like myself, then devoted to purity until that spouse comes along.

SPEAKER_00 24:29

It is so much more fulfilling. Oh my goodness. I'm not just speaking that, you know, just because I'm married, but yeah.

SPEAKER_01 24:35

And it's like, okay, all of you men and women that think it's okay to lust after others, how's your sex life? Oh that part. Are are you even thinking about your husband during your love making session? Probably not.

SPEAKER_00 24:54

I can probably, which I mean, I've I've never been put in that position. Like I've never allowed myself to go there because I have no reason to. Um, I am fully satisfied with the make God has given me. Praise God. Um, women are more drawn to the emotional side, like what I was just saying. Women are more emotional. It's it's such a romantic story, just how the man just takes. I'm like, oh yeah, definitely, bondage is just is so fulfilling and so romantic. It just fills my love tank.

SPEAKER_01 25:27

Something outside of God's plan when it comes to the sanctity of that covenant relationship with husband and wife. So um, one thing that I also heard recently is modesty isn't about hiding, it's about honoring. You're honoring God, you're honoring yourself, you're honoring the people around you. People think, um, you know, like when I mentioned the swimsuit, that you know, I'm hiding my body. And my daughter made the comment of like, why are you hiding all that? It's not about hiding, it's about honoring. I am honoring myself, God, and my future spouse, as well as the other men and husbands around me. Right. Because I don't want to tempt them. The last thing I want to do is tempt somebody else's husband because of what I'm wearing.

SPEAKER_00 26:12

Right. And I understand in scripture, um, I'll have to go back and look and find the specific one, but I know men are held to a higher standard and they have to take more responsibility on their back when it comes to anything related to that. But that doesn't, that doesn't give us a get out of, you know, get out of jail free card with this. I understand women who are not, you know, fully submerged in in the faith with Jesus and they're not saved, they need to be, you know, it's not a um an it's not an attitude change at first. It's it's a they need to meet the father first. They need to meet them first, and then that's whenever the Lord cleans it out. Yes. But if you are lukewarm, like you, you know who the Lord is, yeah, but you're not living right, that's whenever you're in deep trouble.

SPEAKER_01 27:07

And uh and a lot of people will look at religion, they call it, rather than a relationship with Jesus as a set of rules that they have to follow, and then they feel condemned if they're not following it. And then, you know, if any of you are listening to this podcast right now, let me remind you, this is not condemnation. There is no condemnation in Christ Jesus. Amen. But if there is conviction, there may be an area where you need to ask the Lord to search your heart.

SPEAKER_00 27:30

Yes. Um, so you were mentioning swimsuits. I know we weren't gonna go on an extreme tangent on that because that that subject makes me just flat out just that in gym attire. But uh so please wear clothes to the gym. Stop wearing lingerie. Like I'm really done. I don't even want to see it. No, really. Um, so for a while, whenever I met my now husband, DJ, wonderful, wonderful spirit-filled man of God. So we were hanging out a little bit and we were having to be very careful, and I was trying to be mindful of like what I wear around him and you know how long we talk. We were just going through an actual courting situation, so that was pretty awesome. And uh I wore this two-piece, and and again, I'm not condemning anybody that wants to wear you know a bikini or two-piece, you know, that's your relationship with the Lord, and you need to, you know, let him convict your heart if it's something that's that's there.

SPEAKER_01 28:37

I mean, it to me it's ignorant to think that it's it's no big deal and that no one would would ever think anything lustful.

SPEAKER_00 28:45

Right. Like, you know, uh, who am I representing? You know, exactly. Our outfit should match our identity in Christ. Oof, amen. So I found out that he was actually struggling, at least to say, he was kind of struggling whenever I wore that around him. We were swimming in the pool. And I'm like, oh snap. Like, what does that say about me? You know, which and something's clicked in me. Um, now, especially now that I've become a mother. Um, which I I should have changed it then, you know. But now that I'm a mom, I'm like, not is yes, I want to please the Lord, I want to please my husband because he's the only one that gets to see this body. But also, what is my daughter gonna see? Yeah. I want, I want her, like that makes me sick to my stomach. The fact of just the thought of even a man looking at my daughter. That just yeah. So there are so many websites. I'm just telling you, there's so many websites that you can find the cutest modest swimsuits, like swim dresses or bottoms that cover your actual cute, right? Like I don't have to put my hand over my cleavage when I bend over, right? But I found this really cute, like 1950s kind of it's it's it's like a pinup style swimsuit and it covers everything. Yeah. And I put it on my husband's like, whoa, like it's bright red. But you know, even he was like, Hey, you're wearing bright red. Maybe you should have wear that. Yeah, she's a different color. He's just wear brown. Piece of poop, like my girl. But yeah, he was like, I don't want to bite looking at my woman like that, you know. And that made me feel so good. Um I'm like, I don't want men looking at me. Yeah, I want my husband to look at me whenever we're at home. Right, you know, right, yeah. I honestly I feel the most, I I feel the prettiest. I'll just say that. I feel the prettiest now that like even what I'm wearing now, like this very modest dress that I got for Easter, and it's so pretty pretty and so cute. And I just I feel like, hey, I look like an actual like Proverbs 31 woman here. Yeah. And that is the most attractive thing to my husband. So yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:04

Well, let's go ahead and dive into these survey results. And just a reminder that as women pursuing Jesus, it's important that we seek wisdom because wisdom matters, and and and sometimes wisdom means being willing to look at things from someone else's point of view. So we're gonna go ahead and look at those responses and grow in awareness and discernment and um confidence in how we carry ourselves as daughters. So I sent this survey out again to a variety of men, a very diverse group. But the very first question is how important is it to you that women in your family or your circle dress modestly? 70% of them said very important, 20% of them said important, and only 10% of them said don't really care. It's very important to men how women that they care about dress, their wives, their children, their sisters, their mothers. When a woman wears the following, do you feel tempted to think lustful thoughts? Low-cut shirts. We had 30% of them that said always, 30% that said often, 30% that said sometimes, and only 10% that said never.

SPEAKER_00 32:15

So I think that with low-cut shirts, maybe some men, maybe that 10% grew up with their woman wearing with their mothers wearing low-cut shirts, and it was normal or conditioned into thinking that you know this is normal, or they just they're so numb to it. That's what the enemy likes to do.

SPEAKER_01 32:36

Yeah, but you've got the majority of these men here that said that they were tempted to think lustful thoughts by cleavage being revealed. Short skirts, you've got 40% always, 40% of them said always short skirts lead them to think lustful thoughts, 50% sometimes, and 10% often. There was no nevers on this one.

SPEAKER_00 32:59

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 33:00

At least they were honest about it. Absolutely. And then you've got short shorts. There was no nevers on this one either. You've got 40% sometimes, 30% always, and 30% often.

SPEAKER_00 33:13

I do want to say that yes, the women's breast area is that's a very sexualized, you know, that's God meant that for marriage. So, you know, of course it's going to be sexualized. But I think in this day and age, the butt area is way more emphasized. Yeah. Like BBLs. Those, you know, the lifts that the women get, having a fake butt, all that, and this whole twerk and mess, like the goosey roll. And our generation. Yeah, like it's it's yeah, I think a lot of men fall. I can see why that would be more of a thing for that area than it would be for the chest area.

SPEAKER_01 33:55

Yeah. Same thing on short shorts. There were no nevers on that one. We had 40% sometimes, 30% always, and 30% often. Okay, get this one spaghetti strap shirts. You had 30% always spaghetti strap shirts. I used to wear those all the time and think nothing of it.

unknown 34:13

Oh wow.

SPEAKER_01 34:14

And then you've got 30% never. So I mean, fair enough. Yeah, but then you've got another 30% sometimes and 10% often.

SPEAKER_00 34:27

Wow. I mean, I'm not saying that, you know, that we should wear spaghetti straps, you know, like lead in worship. Right. But that's not as much of an emphasis emphasized area, but that just really shows just how burdened these men are by lust. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 34:48

And just how I mean, even just seeing the shoulders is sexual for some men. Because it leads to yeah, undressing. Yeah. Yeah. Backless tops is the next one. You've got 50% that said never, so I guess that's not as tempting, but it wasn't long ago. I saw a girl with a her complete back, her entire back was out in the outfit that she was wearing. And she had beautiful skin and a good-looking back. And I was just thinking, how many men behind her are probably being distracted right now from the message because of what she's wearing? Because you've got 20% here that say always, 20% often, and 10% sometimes. So 50% of the men sitting behind her could be tempted by what she's wearing. And I guarantee you, she didn't know or think twice about that because she wasn't taught or brought up to believe that there was anything wrong with that.

SPEAKER_00 35:37

Right. And selfishness comes with that too. You know, it's all about me, or and honestly, she like you said, she probably didn't think anything of it, or she probably was just like, Hey, this feels good. I like it for you. I know I look good.

SPEAKER_01 35:51

Yeah, I look good. Yeah. Well, here's another one about tight fitting clothing that shows the body shape. So always 22%, and then you have 44% often, 33% sometimes. Nobody said never on that one. I can see that being, yep. We also have yoga pants on here, which is often sometimes, and always we do have a small percentage of nevers, and I'm just gonna go through the rest of them. Um, mid drift tops, a very small percentage of never's, but uh high percentage of always. Got a 40% always. Do you believe that modesty and dress impacts a woman's self-esteem? The majority of them said, I strongly agree, 60%, and the other 40 just said agree. So I want to read some of these responses. In your view, what constitutes modest dress? All of the sensitive regions fully covered, bottom and breast, not intentionally revealing of your stomach or upper legs, no excessive display of tattoos, and no excessive makeup, even. Okay, so even excessive makeup can be tempting. Excessive makeup can have a sexual appeal, right? And this guy says, I don't want to see your skin above your knee or below your collarbone. Just gonna dress like a Muslim now. Dress past the knee, clothes that cover all of the upper body beside your arms and your head, clothing that doesn't show too much of the skin and not form fitting, just be professional and secure at the same time. Not showing cleavage or buttock shape, not showing anything near those areas. And a lot of these are similar. And then please provide any additional thoughts or comments about modesty and its importance in your life. This one says, I think that women who dress provocatively lack self-confidence and don't know their identity in Christ. It should be a key turnoff for a man of God. Modesty is the model of biblical womanhood, and it is an attractive quality for the spiritually minded man. Amen. Amen. So there we are, right there. There is nothing more attractive to a godly man than a modest woman. So if you are seeking to attract a man of God, you need to be modest in what you put on your body. This guy says, Men are physical creatures. We see first. Wearing these revealing type clothes encourage lustful thoughts and cause men to sin, no matter how close they are to God. The devil uses any type of temptation to bring down a man of God, even goes for the men and how they dress around women to cause lustful thoughts.

SPEAKER_00 38:29

I believe that the enemy traps us as women. I'm just using us as a whole, traps us as women. So I do believe so the sanctity of marriage could be destroyed.

SPEAKER_01 38:40

Gosh, you are so right. The enemy is using lust to bring division and destroy marriages. This guy says, although I may have lustful thoughts when women dress inappropriately, I would not want my wife to dress that way and therefore find it unattractive. Like, okay. I don't want my wife to dress that way, but she's dressing that way, and I may have lustful thoughts because she's dressing that way. Like that's telling you right there, you are tempting even men of God and husbands and single men alike. You know, we don't want to tempt any man to, I mean, even if it is a single man and you know, we want to attract him. That's not the kind of attraction and attention that we need to be seeking. That is not the man that you want to be attracting.

SPEAKER_00 39:25

Yes, starts off on the wrong foot. If you want to attract unfaithfulness and you giving off an appearance that pro provokes lust is a good way to start. Absolutely. That's so good. Man, I really hope. I mean, not in a negative way, but I really hope this this stings and just touches on, you know, I I hope it does too.

SPEAKER_01 39:45

And you know, I hope that it grows awareness, but also that it opens some eyes to to realize that when when you feel cute and when your girlfriends are agreeing that, oh, you look good in that, that's you know, um, you know, you're makes it flattering on you, and it's all because your booty looks good. You need some new friends. You get some godly friends. That too.

SPEAKER_00 40:18

That too. Thank you. Amen. Yeah, I'm supporting you by telling you, hey, this is what the scripture says. Yeah. Let's let me let me go take you shopping. Like, I'm gonna get you something new to wear, you know, right, right?

SPEAKER_01 40:33

Yeah, right. And and again, it's not about rules. I mean, when we look at the scripture, it's about it's about purpose and finding our purpose through those scriptures, and always it goes back to the heart, you know, where modesty is protecting our dignity and it's strengthening our confidence in who we are as God's children. And every single time we are gonna be left empty inside when we are seeking the wrong attention through what we're wearing, right?

SPEAKER_00 41:00

And honestly, what I just thought about Satan loves to get his demons, everyone to do his dirty work. So he's using women to do his dirty work in that way. Yeah. I mean, he ain't gotta do nothing. He's just sitting back and just laughing. Yeah. Whenever you put on that.

SPEAKER_01 41:17

Here's the thing is like, you know, my heart hurts for the women that don't know it and that lack the understanding and lack the knowledge and are oblivious to what they're really doing, especially the younger girls. There was this one girl in prayer um that would wear things that I prayed and I prayed and I prayed every time she passed by me, Lord, please just bring somebody into her life. Because I can't just go up to her and just tell her, like, hey, you shouldn't wear that, you know. Yeah, but just pray for the Lord to bring somebody into her life that will bring that conviction, that will bring that correction, that will let her know, hey, this isn't that, you know, if you wear that, this is definitely not the place to do it. Just like, you know, you don't bring a bottle of vodka into church, even if you are an alcoholic. You know, again, modesty is not about it's not about being less beautiful, but it's about letting the right kind of beauty lead, lead your decisions and what you do, what you say, what you wear.

SPEAKER_00 42:18

Again, you need to become what you're praying for. Quit quit saying, Oh, I've been going out every night, you know. I've got my, you know, I put my good perfume on, you know, I put all I beat my face, as they say. Uh I put on the dress, I go out, and first off, you going in bars too, like what you do. It ain't gonna last, but right. You get in a mister right now. That's right. And like, well, what you putting out? What you putting out, boo. What you getting in? Oof. But I know I have to be loving about it though. I can't, yeah, because I I get so angry about this because I see because a lot of men, including my husband, he he struggled with lust and pornography, and praise God, he is so free from that. Like that stuff, it just makes him sick to the stomach, just the thought of it. And we don't watch certain movies, we watch certain TV shows. Shoot, we were at the beach for a honeymoon, and he was like, I don't care to see all that. Well, I mean, it's everywhere, but I guess because he's so mature in his walk with the Lord that he knows you know how to like hold himself and like yeah, like I don't care about that kind of stuff.

SPEAKER_01 43:27

But one thing that comes to mind for me as a sister in Christ, I want to help my brothers in Christ out by making sure that I am very careful in what I wear so that I do not tempt them. So as a part of the kingdom family, dressing modestly is loving your brother in Christ. You are showing love and consideration for not just the brothers around you, their spouses, their girlfriends, be an example to them. Yeah, being an example and you know staying as far away from potential temptation as you can. It's not about oh, it's their problem, but it's about we're in this together. We are to share one another's burdens, right? We're to sharpen each other's swords, we are to walk alongside our brothers and sisters in the faith and edify one another. I would never want to cause my brother to stumble. And these survey results, these are basically men saying, Hey, help us out a little bit, help us keep from temptation and be mindful of what you wear. Well, this has been good. I again hope that this brings some correction, but we know that it is the kindness of the Lord that brings people to repentance. So we also do this with compassion and kindness. And um, we are here for you. If you would like to talk in the last podcast, I have had some people reach out and ask for prayer. I would be honored to pray with you if you are struggling with any of the topics that I cover in my podcast. Um, would be honored to walk alongside you and lift you up, encourage you and help you receive the freedom that you are intended to have as a believer in Christ. So um, thank you, Hannah, for joining me today.

SPEAKER_00 45:13

This has been so great. Yeah, it's been fun. It's such a heavy subject, but it's so powerful. So wonderful, so powerful.

SPEAKER_01 45:22

Well, thank you so much for joining us. And I'm excited to see what the Lord's going to continue to do in your life and in our friendship and in your walk with Christ. Thank you for joining me on this episode of My Father's Business. As we strive to understand our divine purpose and align our lives with God's will, I encourage you to seek his face and his guidance in every step you take. May He bless you with clarity, strength, and a deeper understanding of your identity in Him. Until next time, remember you were created on purpose for a purpose, and it's time to rise up, live intentionally, and embrace the unique plan God has for you. God bless you.