Are Your Friends Holding You Back? The Truth About Growth & Relationships | The Winegards Ep. 2

Welcome back to The Winegards 🍷

In this episode, Eric and Alexis dive into real, unfiltered conversations about friendships, growth, and what happens when your life starts to evolve.

As you grow in business, relationships, and life, your circle changes—and not everyone grows with you. We break down the difference between “social climbing” and genuinely putting yourself in better rooms, how to set boundaries (especially when money is involved), and why your environment plays such a massive role in your future.

We also get personal about:

•  Outgrowing old friendships 
•  The truth about “takers” vs “givers.” 
•  Why setting boundaries is necessary (even when it’s uncomfortable) 
•  How your circle influences your habits, mindset, and success 
•  Preparing for parenthood and shifting priorities 
•  When you actually know you’re ready for kids 

This is real life, no script, no filter. Just honest conversations from a couple building a business, a family, and a life together.

If you’re trying to level up, protect your energy, or figure out your next phase in life… this episode is for you.

👍 Like, subscribe, and follow along as we continue sharing the journey.

Have questions about relationships, business, or life? DM us @the_winegards on Instagram, might cover them in a future episode!

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Hey guys, welcome to another episode of The Wine Guards. This is my favorite podcast of the week, my favorite part of the work week, where I get to talk with my beautiful wife on camera about our relationship, uh building our family, uh, and talking about the people we hang out with today. Um how do you want to dive into this?

SPEAKER_02 0:19

I don't know. I think um, well, you know, your birthday's coming up, right? So I was thinking about naturally I'm I reflect around those time periods, like what's happened in the last year. And I do feel like, you know, for both of us, so much has changed within the last year. Like I feel like in the last two years, so much has changed in each year. And one of the things I was thinking about was how we have so many new friends, and they're so much different than our previous friends. So I was just thinking, like, hmm, is there what's changed? Is it us? Is it where we put ourselves? Um, what have we learned about making these new friendships? Because you know, when you move somewhere new, making friends can be challenging. And I I'm I like our friends down here.

SPEAKER_01 1:04

No, me too. It's interesting. So you um, you know, you asked what's different, and you said, Have we changed? I I genuinely think we've evolved for the better. You know, you said something, I want you to unpack this. You said something really kind of interesting to me when we were doing our doggy walk the other day. That's when I spit fire on the top of the books, and you said you had a different view on social climbing now because we do see people out there that you know there's like a slimy way to social climb, right? They try to latch on to certain people, right? I think that's the definition of a social climber when they're trying to be somebody they're not and trying to be involved with people that they're not, right? Is that a social climber?

SPEAKER_02 1:54

I would say so. Going to great lengths to be, but but I would say they want that relationship not for the right reasons.

SPEAKER_01 2:01

Okay. What are those reasons?

SPEAKER_02 2:03

Um, maybe to be known for a certain status, maybe to get the perks of the friendship, whether if it's that person's, you know, wealth and how they live their life, or that like if someone has like a private jet, they're friends with that person to try to be on their like rider riding their coattails essentially. I think when people social climb to ride someone's coattails, that it's wrong. But like how Patrick But David always talks about this, it's like getting in rooms with people that have conquered more. That's where I think like I think that's how we would say that we've evolved. I don't think that we're social climbing. I think that we've just been blessed to be put in opportunities where we're in rooms with these people that have done such amazing things. And I'm I'm actually honored, you know, like because we're what is it when you're the small fish in the big pond? Yeah. I would rather be that, but I don't think we have any um motivation.

SPEAKER_01 2:54

So let me ask you this. What so definition of social climbing? So you know how very successful people will say you should be the least intelligent or least successful person in the room? I agree with it. Couldn't we argue that that's a form of social climbing? What's the difference? I'm not trying to put you on the spot.

SPEAKER_02 3:12

I'm just No, I really think it comes down to motive. I really think it comes down to motive. Like you just said intelligence, okay? So what are you gaining from that person in the room? It's it's the their intelligence, you know, you're hearing a different perspective based off of their experiences. Whereas, but I used to think social climbing was, like I said, it was more about like the materialism of things or the status or what that person had, you know. Um and I think we know people that unfortunately are like that, where they care more about like the riding of the coattails. They don't want the intellect, they don't want to learn the intelligence. There's a purity to being in a room with other people that have done more than you. The purity that I think you and I have is gaining knowledge and perspective. Like that's all that we want is knowledge and perspective. I don't think we want anything other than that from these people.

SPEAKER_00 4:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 4:01

Whereas there's people that we know that want other things that come with being friends with people who are more successful than them.

SPEAKER_01 4:08

Yeah. No, I I think the big word is motive. It's like, what's what's your intent? Because the way I look at it is I know I'm not saying that our friends today won't be my friends tomorrow, but we're obviously going to keep raising our rooms and the standards that we operate by. And we're climbing, but I think a social climber probably just stays at that bottom tier and never actually evolves. A social climber probably is someone that doesn't evolve.

unknown 4:42

Right.

SPEAKER_01 4:42

Like they're just that bum in the group that's always the bum in the group that's trying to latch on to it.

SPEAKER_02 4:48

It makes me think of um the TV show with Dwayne Wade Ballers, how like all these athletes um come from humble beginnings and then they get the big contracts, but then there's the friend that thinks they're entitled to something because they're friends with the said athlete that got the huge contract.

SPEAKER_01 5:05

Yeah, that's tough.

SPEAKER_02 5:07

It stems from like early history, doesn't actually mean anything, I don't think.

SPEAKER_01 5:13

Interesting. Okay. History doesn't mean anything.

SPEAKER_02 5:16

No, because I think people hold on to years of friendship, right? Oh uh yeah, gr yeah, girl, yeah, boy, dude, whatever. We've known each other for X amount of years. Yeah. That that means they're entitled to something because of that.

SPEAKER_01 5:32

Well, so it's interesting because you know, you're almost in your 30s. I'm in my forties. I'm gonna be in my 50s in a few years. Um, you'll still be a hot little 30-something.

SPEAKER_00 5:44

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_01 5:45

Um, but uh I feel bad for the athletes though, because hear me out. When when you're raised in a rough neighborhood and mom and dad really aren't around, let's say mom's a crackhead, dad's not even around, and you're just kind of raised with like a pack of wolves, and those, dude, those are their brothers.

SPEAKER_02 6:08

Yeah, they went through hardship.

SPEAKER_01 6:10

You know what I'm saying? Like those are their brothers. So if a basketball player, I mean, some of these guys in the NBA, dude, these guys are like we're a big Spurs fan now, right? We're a big Spurs fan.

SPEAKER_02 6:21

We are.

SPEAKER_01 6:22

So Dylan Harper's 19 or 20. Now he had a great upbringing with his father playing in the NBA, but I can see where it would be really tough for a 19-year-old to, you know, to have his friends and his buddies pulling on him. I could see that. But at our age and at our stage of the game, you're 100% right. We we don't owe anybody anything and we shouldn't feel bad about it.

SPEAKER_02 6:44

I don't.

unknown 6:47

I know.

SPEAKER_02 6:48

Um, not to sound cold. Um I just think that cards are dealt, you can either make yourself a victim of your situation, or you rise above it. And everyone came on this earth with different cards. And it's just, you know, there's amazing success stories out there, and then there's people that unfortunately there isn't. So yeah.

SPEAKER_01 7:11

Yeah, I I think one of the things that I'm I'm learning, and and you can say this to people, but sometimes you actually have to go through it to learn it. Does that make sense? Like you can read it in a book, but unless you actually physically experience it, sometimes it's tough to take it as truth or fact. And what I've unfortunately realized over the years, people always said, Oh, you don't want to enable people, oh, you don't want to enable people. And all I've realized in my life is that some of my generosity does enabling, and it genuinely is doing them a disservice, it really is, because then it becomes the expectation. And, you know, like uh that one short form video said, you know, dude, they're gonna resent you anyway.

SPEAKER_02 7:58

Is it Grant Cardone?

SPEAKER_01 7:59

Yeah, Grant Cardone is such a good point. Grant Cardone said, whether you're rich or Grant Cardone said that whether you enable them or not, they're gonna resent you either way. Because at one point you did. Exactly.

SPEAKER_02 8:14

And once you pull away, then you're the asshole.

SPEAKER_01 8:17

Yeah, then you're the jerk.

SPEAKER_02 8:18

Yeah, I mean, and I can think of an instance for that. And and I'm more about for me, I'm big on principle. Um, and I can think of a a a situation like um where this woman unfortunately had asked us for some money that we had a relationship with, and I gave her, you know, the first time she asked, I was like, here, absolutely help. I'm gonna I want to help you out. Here's here's what X amount, like you know, nothing crazy, but I I understand you need some gas money, maybe some groceries, whatever. Um the one time, fine. But then, you know, it came again with the next ask. And as much as I want to help this person, I'm like you said, I would be hurting her just by giving more again, because it's like you know, that uh I love this um psychology, the Pavlov with the dog and ringing the bell and getting the treat and the salvation and stuff like that. Do you know that one?

SPEAKER_01 9:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 9:12

Um I think about psychology major. Right, he was a psychology major. But I was a minor, so I know just maybe a little less than you, but I think about that often. So then when that that that woman came back and asked for more money, I just said, I'm I'm really sorry, I'm not in a position to give you that. And and my explanation actually doesn't matter. Um, my reasoning for not wanting to give whatever that generous monetary thing is, gift, item, whatever, the reasoning actually doesn't matter. But I had to put my foot down and saying, I'm not going to be that person that you know that you can come to and ask for $20 here, $20 there, $20 here, because it all adds up number one. And number two, that's not my responsibility. And I already did what I felt was right, which was that initial gift. And I don't expect anything back. In fact, like when I give something, it's a gift. Like I'm not gonna come back and throw that in your face. But I let it be known that hey, no, that I'm not that person that you can come to and and ask for whenever you need money, and I don't ever want to be.

SPEAKER_01 10:08

I think I think where I really struggle with it is you know me, I'm I'm not cold-hearted about this stuff at all. And in fact, I have to restrain myself from being generous. It's hard to do, it's hard for me to do. But I do struggle with people that are takers and not givers, because nobody's ever given me anything in my life, and I so so I so I end up being the one, the analogy I always get, I'm I'm the one carrying all the logs, you know. I got 50 of them, you know, and I'm a little older now. It's it's tough to carry the logs at 45 versus 25, you know, and I need I need people to to carry some logs. And, you know, growing up the way that I did, with a low socioeconomic background, and you know, when I was 18 years old, there was no talk of college, there was no my mother didn't have any assets, there was nothing that was gonna be given to me. You saw what happened when she passed away. There was nothing. Yeah, right? So there was never this idea of, oh, if I, you know, I'm gonna luck out one day because of my family's financial status, or like I everything that I have ever received, I had to go get on my own. So I struggle when I do struggle when people come to me and want things because everything I've gotten, I've taken.

SPEAKER_02 11:36

And even though I'm generous, in the back of my mind, I don't think everything you've gotten you've taken.

SPEAKER_01 11:42

No, no, I've taken, I I meant like um I I meant it like uh like I'm a warrior, like I went and got it myself. I didn't mean like I was a thief.

SPEAKER_02 11:50

Yeah, yeah, because you said you struggle with takers. I just wanted you to Okay, thank you.

SPEAKER_01 11:54

Yeah, no, thank you for clarifying. Yeah, um, no, I just meant I I've um what I I guess the right word is I've built. I've built, yeah. So so when when people do ask and need these things, I do think to myself, like, what are you actually doing about it? Like, what are you doing about your situation? Right? So it's like, so if your situation is X and you're coming to me because you need Y, why why are you still sitting at X?

SPEAKER_02 12:28

And it's usually a repeat offense, by the way.

SPEAKER_01 12:30

Nonstop.

SPEAKER_02 12:31

It doesn't end.

SPEAKER_01 12:31

Yeah, nonstop. So, you know, obviously, if your sister came to me, Paige, you know, she goes, Erica, I uh I messed up, I gotta pay my rent. I'm like, come on, of course. I'm not just gonna say no, Paige, I can't pay your rent.

SPEAKER_02 12:46

No, that brings me to not to cut you off, but that I that's also where like, you know, I've seen you, you know, you're you're entering into the period of actually being a dad. So not that you can't handle your own shit, obviously you can, but like I have like this like maternal wife thing about me now where I'm like setting I want to set more of those boundaries for us as a family because now if you're gonna be daddy to anybody, it's your immediate family, right? Your immediate you have an immediate family now. So those priorities change. Like our priorities of what giving looks like, it changes for who it is for now because you have an immediate family.

SPEAKER_01 13:19

Yeah, yeah. Mentally, it's like all right, dollar one through a hundred goes to Alexis and Sophia. Maybe that last dollar, 101st dollar, but the first hundred got to go to us moving forward. Um, have you noticed that on the first podcast we did, we both had like baby boo on?

SPEAKER_02 13:37

No, but we're doing it again, totally unintentionally.

SPEAKER_01 13:41

Wow, yeah, and you look so pretty with your blue eyes piercing through our rare blue moon marketing sign that wasn't intentional at all. No, interesting. No, I've never asked you this. Oh no, I think I do know. Is your favorite color pink? Like, is it actually your favorite color?

SPEAKER_02 14:00

I think so. Oh yeah, yeah. This is like my favorite pink ever. Um but like would I wear it all the time? No, I like neutrals and stuff like that.

SPEAKER_01 14:10

Um yeah, no, I I think I think it's healthy for me personally. There, there's my the circle of people I surround myself with directly impacts my behavior. Right? So if I listen, I like to have fun, like I can easily be swooped into a good time, you know. Like if somebody gave me a shot of Jameson here right now, I'd be like, oh, that felt pretty good. Like I'd like another one of those, you know?

SPEAKER_00 14:43

Sure.

SPEAKER_01 14:44

It's but it's saying no to the first one, it's easy. It's like, no, no, I'm good, I don't want to go there. Because I know it's not that I'm like a uh poor, like a reckless drunk or anything, but I'm just like, oh, that f that's kind of nice. Let me go turn it up. So I can easily get persuaded by those kind of people. And I think what's really nice about the people I hang out with now is I'll see them look at me. We'll go somewhere, and they kind of observe me. And like, is Eric having a drink? And I'm usually like, Yeah, no, drinking soda water, whatever, and then they'll just drink soda water. Um, but you know, the other day we're at brunch with our uh beautiful French couple, Francois and Jesse, and I saw Francois look at me like, You wanted some bubbly, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 15:26

I go, I agree, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:27

I go bring out a Bloody Mary, we'll do it, you know. But so my circle, unfortunately, it is the truth. Your circle can kind of dictate your behavior. Wouldn't you agree? Yeah, good and bad? Absolutely, and not that all drinking is bad. That's not that's not.

SPEAKER_02 15:42

No, it's influence. I mean, but the thing is, is that actually for the reason why I m mainly wanted to bring it up is because um the concept of social climbing, I actually think that the conversations that we have with these couples just tap into such a different level of intellect and ideas, like really great conversations. Those we should have a camera on like our business couple conversations because there's so many amazing things that we talk about. It's just so amazing. Like, you know, we get ideas every time we come home, we have different ideas, and that's what I mean. We're what are we gaining? Well, of course, there's great friendships, right? But these there's a lot of people that are smarter than us in different ways, and I'm sure they feel the same vice versa about us, but there's so much perception and um other knowledge to gain from other life experiences and perspective. Perspective, yes, thank you. Pregnancy brain.

SPEAKER_01 16:30

It's always really cool.

SPEAKER_02 16:30

I know. Um we're blaming it on the pregnancy brain right now. But I love that. And I've and I that's something that I've always struggled with, is like I've never been a surface level person. So it's always been hard for me to be like one of those girls in a big girl group to talk about dumb shit. Like, ooh, like I'm gonna checking, like what are you wearing, stuff like that. You know, I struggle with a typical big girl group because I don't think uh most people talk about it is very entertaining or fun. And you know, I'm more of a serious gal. So like I really respect the the ladies that I hang out with down here. It's like, you know, they're good, they're fun conversations for me.

SPEAKER_01 17:09

You know, it's it's I don't know if we talked about this on on the other podcast. Like, I like I do think there's I do think one of the biggest problems that hurt our society was women, women getting into the workplace to a large degree. I'm not an economist, I'm just guessing. So this probably shouldn't even film this because it's probably gonna be the dumbest thing ever. But my gut tells me that because of finances, I bet is the real reason that a lot of women started getting into the workforce.

unknown 17:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 17:48

So I don't know if it was the Me Too movement or a combination of both, but but because of inflation and rising food cost, living cost, mortgages, that women that they needed a supplemental income. Oh, you can go to work too now, you know, get a job as a secretary, like in Mad Men, right? And husband's a bread earner, but that extra back then, you know, six or seven thousand dollars a year really helped out. Today it would be more like the extra $50,000 a year really helps out. Okay. And obviously what happened there was, you know, now the kids are raising themselves. There's there's not as much of I don't want to say a home life, but but there's some advantages and disadvantages to it for sure. If the only real advantage is is the the financial necessity that you need to do it. So I think it was done out of necessity. But I will say, I've told you this before, I'm very attracted to your business assertiveness and the couples that we tend to get with, some of them are plenty of them are stay-at-home moms. Plenty of them. Yeah, um, but most of them are pretty business minded. And I think, and what's cool about this podcast is you know, this thing's gonna blow up. It's good you watch in two or three years, this podcast will be a household name. It's gonna be business couples that are watching it, couples that are in business together. Um what are the any comments?

SPEAKER_02 19:22

No, and I think even if the moms or the wives are stay at home, they actually still are in tune with their husband's business. Even if they're not actively participating, they're in tune. And they can they can speak of it if they want to, and if they don't want to, they don't.

SPEAKER_01 19:37

Yeah, you're thinking about the wealth manager we went out to dinner with the other. Yeah, yeah. She doesn't, but she's totally doesn't work with them, but she's totally locked and stuck stuff in stuff. So could be a businesswoman if she chose if she wanted to be, yeah. Yeah. Um, no, I think I just find myself more attracted to you. Like I would say the last lady I was with wasn't like that. The woman I was with before that was like that. The other ones I think I was just too young to know at the time. But um, but definitely, but we'll see, we'll see we'll see how we'll see what happens with you here in a few months. It's like we're talking all this junk, and you're about to pop out this baby girl. We'll we'll see if you change.

SPEAKER_02 20:24

It's funny you say that because I was in a text art this morning um with two girls that I know, and the one girl asked me, is Sophia gonna be in daycare? And I said, I don't think so. Um, but I said, you know, I do work from home. If anything, maybe I could have someone come help out while I'm at home or whatever. And then one of the responses was like, that would be so hard for me because I would just think, you know, I'm the mom, I can take care of my baby better than said helper could. Um but like I had said in the chat, I have really no idea. I might all of a sudden just have this like new tap into another a new part in my brain, this um, this love that I've never endured before. And I'm like, I want to be stay at home for however long, right? And then start doing like hybrid and then get more full time back at work once the children get older or whatever. I literally said, I don't think I can say until I I know, until b the baby's here. Um, but I do appreciate that I have options, you know. I'm not cornered to daycare nanny um coming back to work. So I do appreciate that I have choices. I just um don't know what they'll be yet.

SPEAKER_01 21:40

Yeah, I'm gonna withhold opinion on any of this. Uh withhold a judgment or a opinion. Because I don't know. I will tell you this. You were when you and I were talking about having kids, we knew we wanted to have kids, but our timeline it we were also kind of Saying if it doesn't happen another year or so, we're okay. Right? But it was kind of like, all right, pull the goalie, you know, Eric, do what you gotta do, and just rock and roll. And and we went and rock and rolled that one time, and boom, here's pregnancy. So I'll tell you this before pregnancy, you weren't like this person that was like, I'm just dying to be a mother. That wasn't you're like, no, no, I know I will be. I will be, and when that time comes. But a week into you being pregnant and like you worrying about pregnancy and like you worrying if the baby's okay because you you were sick that day or whatever. I remember you you were kind of like teary-eyed with me. You're like, I really want this baby to be safe. It was like so Lucia, you're getting emotional.

SPEAKER_02 22:52

I know. That's cute. I'm excited for Sophia. But this could just be like a hormonal reaction. So yes, it could just be something that I never would normally have, which I don't typically zoom in on her.

SPEAKER_01 23:04

Guys, no, don't zoom in on her guys, guys. I have an announcement. This woman does not cry. And I got her teary-eyed on the podcast. I remember that. Well, also, what are you thinking about? What's the thing?

SPEAKER_02 23:14

Because, like, you know, first of all, it's our first. But also, like, you know, I know it's such a blessing to carry this baby, but like, you know, the first trimester is so nerve-wracking, and you hear all those stories about like chemical pregnancies where, like, you know, like you test positive, then you go to the um the first appointment, there's no heartbeat, right? And like I really, once we got pregnant, I was like, oh my God, I want this so bad. I think in that moment I was like, this is like I really, really want this. And of course, I wanted to do anything I could to like keep, now that we know it's a girl, keep her safe. But um, it's it was just so uh it's very nerve-wracking when it's your first time, at least it was for me, because I'm like thinking like, oh my god, like chemical pregnancy, like miscarriage, you know, you especially with social media. My mom was like, gosh, I feel so bad that your social media is the way that it is around pregnancy because you get all these things in your mind about like, you know, there's so many tests in the beginning that were so um not overwhelming. I don't know if that's the right, but there's such an anticipation about the results, right? Like the first ultrasound with the heartbeat. I was so anxious for that because I'm like, I really want this, you know, and I want to do everything I can to keep this baby healthy. And then then the one after that, then is the blood testing and making sure that her like the genes are all good to go, you know, and there's no um Down syndrome or anything like that, right? Like there's just so many different checkpoints. And I would say the first trimester is like the most important in checking those checkpoints. Now I will like ask Eric, I'll be like, oh my belly hurts, you think everything's okay? Like da-da-da-da-da. But the beginning was really nerve-wracking, and I think I remember because I had a really bad fever, I think that's what happened. And I just was like, oh my god, is this gonna affect my baby that I have a really bad fever early on? And it's just mostly be you know, because I care. So that was all that went through my mind because I remember that moment.

SPEAKER_01 25:07

Yeah. So you and your mother obviously have a connection. Yeah, like your besties. You can say no. Do you kind of already feel a little connection to Sophia? Or no? Or does it just feel like you got a belly?

SPEAKER_02 25:27

I definitely feel the connection in the sense like I care so much, but like, and I love feeling her, right? Like I love when she kicks, like it's like the best feeling. Um, but I know it'll be stronger. It's like a different, like, it's my level of care, you know, because like you said before, of course, we had acknowledged that I'm just trying to get you to cry again. He won't. That was like a one-off, and it was tears. It wasn't a full-blown cry.

SPEAKER_01 25:55

But we still got a couple minutes. Um, I got questions to ask.

SPEAKER_02 25:58

Yeah, sure, sure, sure. But I think um it's just my a different part of me. I've tapped into a different part of care. But you know, her crib's coming Friday, and I'm excited to build it out. Now I'm actually just eager. I'm like, I know can she just not I want her to be in my belly full term and everything be healthy, and I'm again very blessed to be able to carry this baby. Um, but I'm just like, oh, I I just actually am excited for her to be here, and I know that it's gonna be a different set of challenges that we haven't conquered before. Um, but I wouldn't want to do it with anyone else, so I know it'll be fine.

SPEAKER_01 26:33

Yeah, we get we're getting our crib. What did I call it the other day? A cage? What did I call it?

SPEAKER_02 26:41

You called it a crate. No or cage. I'd have to ask my mom, she would remember.

SPEAKER_01 26:45

I was like, I was like, where's that cage coming? Our cage is coming Friday? Yeah, it's like a UFC cage. So what our baby's sleeping in, like a little bit of a couple of things. Sure, it's a baby, yeah. A crate. These microphones are a different way. I'm just trying to get used to it. It's all good. Bada bing. Ooh, I like that.

SPEAKER_02 27:06

I just don't touch it the way that you do.

SPEAKER_01 27:08

Yeah, no, I like to. I like Dave thinks it's cool.

unknown 27:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 27:12

He told me he he told me he thinks it looks like I'm a rapper and I know what I'm doing.

SPEAKER_02 27:16

Yeah, clearly. I was thinking about something on the topic of children. But I was talking to like one of my best friends yesterday on the phone, and she's getting married. And um, you know, like we're for the most part, I would say we're pretty close in like the same life path of timelines of marriage. Very similar. She doesn't have babies yet, but she's getting married, right? And um, it's just like the conversations are cool to have because we used to have like just different conversations as younger girls 10 years ago. Um, but she you know her fiance is a little older than her too, and he wants to have you know babies before a certain age and stuff like that. And I just was like, You I want you to share this with him. You know, I want there's a silver lining with him being an older dad because there's so many people that I know that our dad do have, you know, our dads, or that there's people that they know that are dads and had children young, and either they're not happy in the relationship, right? Like now they have a kid with this person and they're just not in love and whatever, or maybe they couldn't be the best dad at that point, you know. So I was sharing the silver lining. I said, sure, he's gonna be older, but look at the plus side. He's wiser, he knows who he is, he's been through more life experiences, you guys are financially set, he knows he wants to be with you, right? And I would argue, like, sure, take him being a little bit of an older dad to have that in return.

SPEAKER_01 28:39

Yeah, so if I would have had a child at 25, I would have felt like I'm missing out on fun.

unknown 28:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 28:48

Because I liked having fun. I would have and I probably would have would have had maybe some I don't want to say animosity, but just just some type of frustration about being a parent, right? I'm sure I would have gotten over it, would have been amazing, but that was just the frame of mind I was in at 25. 35, I was uh in the frame of mind to be a parent, but I wasn't as emotionally sound as I am today. So even though I was ready in my head, I wasn't ready emotionally for the child. Right now, I'm like damn near the a perfect human. And I can and I'm gonna be a perfect dad for the child as much as I can be. And then, you know, the only caveat here is you know, when I'm 70, is when she'll probably get married, but that's okay. I just gotta get on every peptide in the world.

SPEAKER_02 29:45

But um sure, but you know, the argument goes back and forth. Like, you know, there's some people that we know that have really unhealthy habits as parents. Yeah, who's to say that they'll even make it to 70? That's what I mean. So it's perspective, once again.

SPEAKER_01 30:00

Yeah. Yeah, perspective.

SPEAKER_02 30:03

And then the one last thing I'll say, because I know we we have to wrap up in a few minutes, but what was interesting too is because she was also asking me, she's like, Well, how did you know that you guys were ready? Or how did you know that you were ready? Right? Because I feel like that's a question. And every woman's different in how they answer this. And I said, you know what? For me, I feel like I knew I was ready when I literally was like, I have, I love, have loved the life that I've lived for myself up until this point. I I I like all of my experiences that I've had, my travels, um, exploring like new career paths, whatever it might be. I'm sad. Like I feel like if there's a time for me to be selfless with caring and caring for some caring, carrying a baby and caring for a child, it's because I'm like, I feel like I did everything I needed to hit on my own, independently, right? Not to say that I won't have my independence when Sophia's actually here, but that's how I knew I felt like I was ready. I was like, you know, I don't know if there's a feeling of I'm ready, but for me, it was knowing that I um did everything I wanted to do for me prior to.

SPEAKER_01 31:09

Yeah, yeah. And I think that's healthy to do too. I I think the worst thing, I think the worst thing people can do when they make decisions is when they know that they still have an itch to be someone that they're not ready to be.

SPEAKER_02 31:23

She said she was she doesn't think she's she thinks she has a few more years. I said then give yourself that time.

SPEAKER_01 31:28

Doesn't mean that if she got pregnant, she wouldn't be a great mom. Um I think you knew you were you were ready.

SPEAKER_02 31:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:36

I've groomed you well.

SPEAKER_02 31:38

That's such a crazy word. I did. I groomed you well.

SPEAKER_01 31:42

You gotta remember I met you, you were 23. I was 30 now, I had just turned 40.

SPEAKER_02 31:47

Careful, you might get canceled.

SPEAKER_01 31:50

Nah.

SPEAKER_02 31:52

But yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:53

We're gonna get people tuning in, some old dirty men. Like, how'd you do it, Eric?

SPEAKER_00 31:57

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:59

Yeah, yeah. I mean, listen, when I first met you, a lot of your conversations are oh my god, when I was in college, it's like we used to do this, this, and this in my college girlfriends. Abroad. Yeah, oh my god. I kept having to hear about oh my god, when I was abroad, we just it was I just want to go abroad again. Uh but you know, you were but I I knew you were that that was your life experience at the time. You know, and now six years together, your life experiences are totally different. And uh yeah, you're ready, you're you're way past ready, and we're probably gonna go back to back, probably have another child relatively quick, assuming everything works out and everything is safe. I think for anybody that's listening to this right now, something that I think Alexis and I want everybody to know, we don't think we have it all figured out. Like, we don't think we have our relationship a hundred percent figured out, we don't think we have uh business completely figured out, we don't think we have anything completely figured out, but we've done a better job than most, and and I would argue our relationship is a damn near model relationship today, but it took time to get there, but it took time to get there, it took time to get there, and I believe the reason why it did is we met each we're the right people for each other, and and I feel like we met each other at the right time, like our timelines matched up. So, yeah, I I think and then couples in business. I mean, we work well together because we know each other's roles. Listen, the man should be the CEO, the man should be the alpha for sure. And I think sometimes I see these alpha men with another alpha female, and and they're clashing because she's trying to insert herself too much. I see that clashing sometimes. You gotta let the man, unless he's naturally a beta, and you know, that's how your relationship works. And I do know some relationships that work like that, but but unfortunately, I don't, you know, not to go off on another topic, but that woman's probably looking at other men, let's be honest. Um, but we genuinely just want you guys to listen and follow and subscribe. Make sure to like and subscribe because you know, as we're growing and learning, we're just gonna share our our our learning moments with you. And you might be a young couple, you might be uh somebody you you might be thinking about starting a business together as a couple, and you're not sure if you want to do it, you know, comment below and and let us know some of the questions that you have. Or you can find me at Eric Weingard Official or Alexis Weingard Official. DM us, we'll we'll tell you, you know, some stories about how we figured out how to manage our uh business together. But other than that, we'll see you again on the next episode of the Weinguards. And uh make sure to like and subscribe. We'll see you again.