Capacity: Your Secret Weapon For Sustainable Success

Success doesn’t usually fail because you aimed too high. It fails because your capacity didn’t grow fast enough to hold what you earned. Marc Hildebrand and Curtis Gray go deep on capacity building as the real secret to sustainable success, the kind that lasts in business, money, health, leadership, and relationships. If you’ve ever hit a goal and immediately felt overwhelmed, scattered, or weirdly guilty, this conversation puts language to what’s happening and shows you how to expand the internal container first.

We break down a simple test Marc uses with coaching clients: if someone handed you the exact business you want today, could you sustain it and grow it? That leads into why so many lottery winners end up broke, and how money, success, and attention don’t change you so much as expose your habits, discipline, and mindset. Curtis also introduces conscious affiliation, the idea that the people you spend time with either stretch your standards or shrink your ambition, because they speak their own capacity limits into your plans.

Then we get personal and practical: the difference between confidence and self-confidence, why struggle can reveal what you’re capable of, and how gratitude works as a logical tool to raise energy and train your brain to look for what’s working. We also point you toward the Self-Leadership Lab, a structured way to build the reframing and self-coaching skills that make capacity feel natural when life gets hard. If this helps you, subscribe, share it with a friend who’s chasing “more,” and leave a review. What’s the next area where you need bigger capacity?

To check out more information about the Self-Leadership Lab, go to: 

https://modernleadership.us/lab

If you'd like to reach out to Marc or Curt, here are the links!

Marc: ModernLeadership.us 

Curt: CurtisGray.net 

If you would like to go deeper, join the KLS Inner Circle!

Transcript

Welcome And The Capacity Question

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Welcome to Lux Manifest the Podcast, where we empower people and inspire Kane. I'm Mark Elderbrand. I'm the founder of Modern Leadership Coaching. And I'm Curtis Gray, founder of Kane Legacy Studios. And we're here to help you manifest without guilt. Let's go.

SPEAKER_02 0:24

Hey, what's up, man? How you doing? What's up, brother? I'm pumped. Why are you pumped? Because of the uh the topic?

SPEAKER_00 0:32

Because of the topic, because you kind of like primed me a little bit, because you asked me some powerful questions, like in that email that I was looking at, and I'm like, oh, this is gonna bring out a lot. And I think this is what really people need to hear what we're gonna talk about today. Capacity. Let's do this. Right.

SPEAKER_02 0:47

I knew you were gonna be fired up about this topic, man. So for everybody out there today, we're gonna be talking about capacity, the secret to sustainable success. Yes. Most people think success is about getting more. In reality, success is often about becoming capable of handling

Why Success Requires More Capacity

SPEAKER_02 1:05

more. If your capacity does not grow, your success will eventually exceed your ability to manage it. What do you think about that thought, man?

SPEAKER_00 1:14

I think that is amazing. Can I already give you an example? Because when I have some of my one-on-one clients, I ask them this question because they're they are so excited to be able to create what they want to create, have like a multi-million dollar business, be able to have all of this success in accolades, and they're in a hurry to get there. You ever you ever hear that before? Oh yeah. Oh yeah. And so when I'm having this conversation, I'm like, okay, so if like I were to give you my business right now, okay? My business is functioning at the level that you want it to be at. How long do you think you'd be able to sustain my business and even potentially allow it to grow? And the person's like, I have no idea what I would do. I would probably feel like stuck. I would be like, well, what do I do next? It would probably dwindle and disappear. And I'm like, exactly. Because you haven't developed the capacity to run a business at this level, because you haven't gone through the steps, you haven't gone through the pain, you haven't gone through the lessons, you haven't been able to hold the things that I have to hold in this day-to-day, not just business, but some of the things that Teresa's going through with like diagnoses and all of these kind of stuff. When you get into this situation, you have to be exceptional at developing your capacity so that when you achieve it, not only do you get to keep it, but you get to keep growing into that next level. And so sometimes we want to rush through that pain. And I'm like, no, that's the thing that's gonna help you develop that capacity. And I know you were kind of talking about like lottery winners and how that comes up too. So I want to hear your take on that.

SPEAKER_02 2:44

Um lottery winners. Yeah, lottery winners. First of all, shout out to Teresa. Yeah, she is a hero around here. Shout out to Teresa and Liz. And Liz, shout out to Liz, Miss Business Queen over here. She is doing her thing. She's doing her thing. But you know,

The Client Test Of Readiness

SPEAKER_02 3:01

it's funny. We mentioned Teresa, we mentioned Liz, any number of people that we surround ourselves with, right? It goes to show how how like building success and building your capacity, it all goes hand in hand with what I call conscious affiliation. We have to surround ourselves with people that are ambitious, driven, success-minded. We become the average of the five people you spend the most time around. And so we're shouting out our beautiful wives. They are success-minded, they're ambitious, they're holding things down. Pretty much everyone in my circle, and I can speak for Mark in his circle as well, that will help you to build your capacity and hold on to success because life isn't neutral. So you're either giving energy to someone or they're giving it to you. So we want to make sure that we focus on affiliating ourselves with the right people. Now, as far as the lottery problem, why do some people achieve success and keep it while others achieve success and lose it? A lot of lottery winners end up broke. I'm sure you guys have heard that. Um Don't be broke, right? Don't be broke. Don't be broke, whatever you do. Um I'm not gonna say his full name, but I don't want to be sued. But it was a lottery winner named Curtis. He won the lottery twice. I believe he ended up broke. Yes, yes. I'm not gonna say the full name, but I'll tell you after the show. Okay. But he won the lottery twice, man. I think his first win was two million dollars. He gets down to his last thousand dollars out of two million, and he uses that thousand to buy a thousand more lottery tickets and wins a thirty million dollar lottery. What? Yeah, now if I've got the amounts wrong, I'm sure there are people in the audience that are like, ah, we got you, you're wrong. So I might have the amounts wrong, I'm getting that up front, but I know that the second time he won was much larger than the first time, and he blew through that. The last I heard, he was broke all over again. That's the capacity problem. We can wish for success. We wish for the lottery. But I always think, well, if you won the lottery, you'd probably be doing a lot of what you're doing now. In other words, if you have great money habits now, good, win the lottery. You have the capacity to handle that, to manage that money. If you have terrible money management habits and a bad mindset, all lottery winnings are going to do is expose that. I definitely think that if your habits, your discipline, your financial education, your mindset do not increase along the way, when success arrives, it's gonna come and go like the wind.

SPEAKER_00 5:41

Indeed. Indeed, indeed. There's this philosophy that money doesn't uh change you, it just makes you more of who you already are. And so if you're bad with money or you do those kind of things, you're just gonna do more of that stuff, right? Um, because just having money by yours doesn't necessarily change you. But but on the topic, the first one that you talked about, like the people that you surround yourself with. I remember being a police officer and I was trying to grow my coaching business. Just how their thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors, just even the conversations that we were having, for them, they didn't have any capacity to grow a business. They didn't have a capacity to plug into personal growth. They didn't have that capacity. And it was very easy for them to convince me not to do it. And so, yeah, it is, I feel like it is the cheat code. It's the reason why we put together this podcast is because when you get into an environment

Conscious Affiliation And Your Circle

SPEAKER_00 6:26

with other people who are about developing capacity, you will develop capacity on another level. And it's kind of crazy how that happens, but it's just the way that we are as humans. We tend to model the behavior of the people that we're around, but also model the thoughts of the people that were around. So, yes, the cheat code, always find a group, a few levels above you that feels uncomfortable. Maybe you feel like you're not ready for that room. That's the exact room for you to be in. We all have different pains and struggles. And when somebody asks me, like, hey, where do I have the greatest opportunity to develop a capacity? I say, where is your biggest challenge right now? Because that's where you need to develop capacity. That's the way the problems work. Is problems, I don't think of them as like negative. I think of them as like, this is the bullseye that's telling me where I can lean into that's gonna help me grow the most. Yes, in business and income, but also in relationships. I'm like, oh, thank God I have this problem because this is exactly where I need to spend my time and my energy, because it's gonna help me develop into who I need to become. But if you're like pretending it's not there or trying to move past it or pushing it down or really not learning the lesson, right? You're gonna keep making the same mistakes, but the next mistake is not gonna be a $2 million mistake, it's gonna be a $30 million mistake and then it's gonna be a $300 million mistake. You keep carrying those mistakes because you're not learning the lesson. And I do like to say this like when people go through this stuff and they don't learn the lesson, I don't really think there's anything wrong with them. It's just that I feel like people in their life maybe haven't taken the time to go, hey, like let's figure this out. I I kind of want to call you forward a little bit. Like, I want to help you in this scenario. And if the person is not willing and open to do that, then maybe it's on them. It doesn't make them a bad person. But like at the same time, like this is trying to teach you a lesson. And I kind of want to call my friends forward and go, no, let's not keep going through this stuff. Let's learn the lesson and develop that capacity in this area.

SPEAKER_02 8:10

That's right. I mean, at the end of the day, it's it's again back to being intentional about who you affiliate with, because you hit on a good point. People will speak their opinions into reality for you. So if they don't have capacity, they're seeing your goals and your ambitions through that lens. So everything they say to you is coming from a place of limited capacity, and before you know it, that becomes a reality for you too. So you do have to be careful of who you surround yourself with. That's a very important point. You also raised a good point about the struggle. I think struggle reveals and then success exposes. Now, capacity is built through repetition. So your goal can't be just to achieve success. It has to be to become the kind of person who can sustain success once it's achieved. It's the same thing as with fitness. You have an amazing story, you lost over a hundred pounds, and it wasn't the tactics, it was the person you had to become. Because all the time I've known you, you've been fit as hell. It's not like you rebounded. So if you'd leaned into the tactics, Chinese, you might have blown back up in weight even more than you did before, because you never changed who you were as a person. You didn't develop yourself as a person. I think that's really important. I know you got I know you're chomping at the bit speaker on this one. So go ahead.

SPEAKER_00 9:31

The floor is yours, man. I'll make this one very, very short because like um when I was 100 pounds overweight, I was working a police career. I was first connected with Teresa, didn't have kids at the time. But when I think about the capacity limit that I was at that point, it was I had limited time with all of the extra work that I was doing, the focus on Teresa and all of these extra things that were now becoming my responsibility by becoming a police officer and working for LAPD, being on the gang team, all that kind of stuff is like I had to get good with holding the capacity of excelling as a police officer, excelling as a husband, and then also taking care of myself. And what I wasn't good at is holding that capacity. I would give it to one of those two other things, and I was like the last on that list, right? So being able to develop into the type of person that I wanted to be where I could lose the weight and keep it off, I had to develop that capacity. And it wasn't a matter of which workout I did and which nutrition plan I ate. Obviously, those are important through the mission, be able to find something that works for you. But it was like the willingness to

Lottery Winners And Habits Exposed

SPEAKER_00 10:34

feel like, hey, I have all of these things that I have going on. I have all of these irons in the fire. But at the same time, this thing related to my health is gonna make me better at all of these other things. How can I hold that capacity, knowing that some of the things are gonna have to change? But how can I just become the type of person that does this stuff automatically? And through that process, I know a lot of what I teach is like self-leadership and self-coaching, is through that process, just got me to show up to be the type of person who exercises, who creates more energy because of my thoughts that allow me to get more things done in less time. And it was crazy because it was like I didn't get any more than 24 hours in a day, but I was so much more productive. I was so much more energized. I was like really, and then, and then because of that, I decided to add a business to that. Well, think about this for a second, okay? I didn't have the capacity to work full time and to lose weight, but I found and developed the capacity to work full time, create a multiple six-figure business, be a father, be a husband, and get into the best shape of my life and stay there. Same person, different insides, internal transformation that had happened, same time frame, way more productive. And I would deem it as more successful, not because of the monetary, but because I was being the father and the husband that I wanted to be. That's the ultimate priority for me. But like that's what happens when you're able to develop that capacity. It's the outside that needs to change. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 11:55

No, it's it's very little of the outside. Tactics without the right mindset is like having a car with no gas. You know, you're not going anywhere. And even if you do get it to move, you're not going very far. I love what you said about um there was a point where you had a full-time job and trying to lose weight, and that was too much. And then you found your capacity increasing over time, and now you seek yourself as someone who's able to handle all of that stuff, so therefore you can't. And a lot of times the only way that gets revealed to us, unfortunately, is through struggle. You know all the losses I had all at once. So this may be the first time I'm saying this in public, but I had a um widowmaker heart attack. And you know, I had a 15% chance of surviving that. And then a few months after that, I lost my sister uh to breast cancer. And then a few months after that, my fiance, Liz, was diagnosed with breast cancer. And all of these things happened back to back to back. And not six months before all this stuff happened, I had much less on my plate. I was telling myself, Oh, I don't know how I'm gonna get through day to day. This is so hard, this is so tough. Little did I know, life was like, yeah, okay, we're gonna show you what tough means. But the point is, right, it's not to break out the violins. The point is I believe I came through with flying colors. And on the other end of all that, my capacity was increased and I knew it. I saw myself differently. It gave me the confidence I needed to lean into building a business like I'm doing right now. You increase your capacity, you're increasing your self-confidence. I love the way you break down the difference between confidence and self-confidence.

SPEAKER_00 13:47

Can you refresh my memory on how that goes? Absolutely, absolutely. Before I get into

Problems As The Bullseye For Growth

SPEAKER_00 13:51

that though, one one thing I do want to call out to is you going through all of that hard, not only did that actually make you the person that you are today, but it increased like the value that you get to bring to other people. So one of the things that people don't realize is that when you get through a very hard thing, you fundamentally change internally. And now you get to inspire and motivate and help other people through that too. Because of the whole idea we're gonna talk about confidence versus self-confidence. But when you get through that thing, you see other people's heart and you're like, You got this. I can help you through this. I've been through hard things too, and I know you've been through hard things, but I'm gonna let you know, like, I'm gonna be with you every step of the way, but you can do this. All right. And there's a different feeling when you're communicating that before when you haven't necessarily gone through all those hard things. So, so believe it or not, like these hard things. I think the biggest reframe in this entire podcast is think about the quote unquote problems or challenges or struggles you're going through. And we got to start seeing these as these are the opportunities because when you get through them, they actually help you develop capacity and value and help you bring up your business, how you elevate yourself as a parent, as a spouse, as everything. And if you didn't have these, you'd be stuck at that last level. So I want to make sure that people like grab onto that and reframe.

SPEAKER_02 15:09

That's a very important point to make people complain about their problems. And nobody loves problems. You know, like we're not saying that. Um, you're entitled to the full range of emotions, normal human reactions. But the thing is the reframe. Your problems are challenges. If you see them as challenges, then you see them as something that can be overcome. And once you overcome those challenges, you're a stronger person on the other side. And then you have that confidence or self-confidence as you're about to break down. And what's even more important is you can, like you said, lend that to others.

SPEAKER_00 15:42

Yeah. So big time, big time, big time. Because if you have a challenge, you can't change the fact that you have a challenge. It's a complete waste of time to focus any time, energy, and frustration. I know there's some processing that has to be done. But when I think about situations like that, I'm like, this sucks, but any time focused more on what's broken, wrong, or missing is not gonna actually help me. Why don't I take this and figure out a way of using this for me? And it doesn't mean that it feels great in the moment because none of those challenges, none of our challenges are like, yay, I'm so glad this is happening right now. Because I'm not a masochist. No. But at the same time, I'm like, I am not gonna use my time and energy against me. I'm gonna figure out a way of using this for me, right? And it's like you can't go back and change the past or the fact that you're in this challenge. It's there. So let's try and stop pretending like it's not there or like trying to push it away and lean into it and figure out like how to process it, right? So, okay, there's confidence and self-confidence. Super simple. Confidence is based off of something that you've done before. Like you have confidence because you've done that thing previously. So you know that there's a very good likelihood that you can do it in the future. I like to think about like pouring a glass of water. Like, how many of you guys have poured a glass of water before without spilling it? Right? You're pretty confident, probably, that you can pour another glass of water. And it's because you've done it before, right? The problem with confidence, though, is when you think about things that you've never done before and never tried, you actually can't have confidence because you've never done it. You don't know what's gonna happen. That's where the second piece comes in, where there's a difference between confidence and self-confidence. So confidence means something you've done in the past, so you're gonna be able to do it in the future. Self-confidence means you have full confidence in yourself, knowing that there are only two possible outcomes to this new thing you're about to do. Either you're gonna do it right or you're gonna learn and grow. There is no part in failure. There's no part in like any of that other nonsense your brain tells you. There's only two outcomes. I'm about to try something I've never done before, and only two things are gonna happen. I'm gonna do it right, or I'm gonna learn and grow. And we kind of have already talked about on this episode where we get the most growth is when we actually quote unquote learn, when we find a way of not doing it. Because when you do it right, you don't know if you it was a fluke, you don't know if you got lucky. All of a sudden your bank account goes up and you're like, How did I make that happen? How do I do that again? And so many people want that. They want that. They're like, I can't wait for my video to go viral. And then they have a video that goes viral and they're like, I have no idea what happened there. And then also, then also it's funny. It's funny because like you have a video that goes viral, and then all of a sudden the wrong people are reaching out to you because it's like you made a funny video and it has nothing to do that's connected to your business. And now you're trying to like sift through. I have clients who do this, hundreds and hundreds of messages of people going, I actually brought more destruction into my business because now I have so many people that are the wrong people reaching out to me. And then everybody else is sharing this. It's like they actually create more problems because of that thing, right? So it's like understanding the difference between confidence and self-confidence is really important because anytime you approach something new, it's like, hey, I've never done this before. It's okay to feel a little bit nervous, right? As a matter of fact, in order to be brave, I need to feel fear first. And if I

Fitness Transformation Through Self-Leadership

SPEAKER_00 18:50

feel the fear and I get myself to lean in and go, hey, I'm only gonna do this right or learn, knowing that you're going to approach that as the best version of you and then just figure out what happens. Then you're gonna see sometimes when you do it right, sometimes you learn, but now you can bump that into the confidence level, right? I've been able to do this, I've been able to accomplish this, I helped somebody through this. Now you can take it as confidence, but if you've never done something, you gotta tap into your self-confidence.

SPEAKER_02 19:13

I love that. You guys hang on to that one. It's a beautiful way of looking at light. And it also goes under the category of self-leadership, self-leadership, which is something we're going to talk about. I'm not letting you off this episode without talking about the self-leadership lab. So we're gonna definitely get to that. Okay. Now, I'd also like to talk about gratitude and I think that's huge in increasing your capacity. What are you talking about? This sounds very woo-woo. It's true. Because if you can't be grateful for what you already have, life has a tendency of not wanting to give you more. You have to be a good steward of the things you already have in your life. Be a good caretaker of what you already have. Your health, your relationships, whatever income level you're at now, whatever opportunities are available to you now, be grateful for all of these things. Take good care of them, and life has a tendency of giving you more. It's almost like, well, you want a million dollars, but you haven't proven that you can take care of ten thousand dollars. So I do believe that gratitude is very important. You have a daily gratitude practice that I'd like you to share with the people. You can't come on this podcast, Mark, when you step into this booth, I'm going to get you to reveal all your personal secrets.

SPEAKER_00 20:33

It's good, dude. It's all good. I love I love that you asked me this stuff, and I love that you know me so well. Yeah, so I have a gratitude practice. I have also an affirmation practice, but um, but I want to share like two logical ways that gratitude kind of like um works for me. Please do. Because uh, I think a lot of times when we get into like the woo-woo kind of stuff, people don't slow down to think about like how logically it works. And when you see how it works logically, you can sell yourself in on the woo-woo stuff because that's actually how it works. So, number one is when I focus on gratitude, it elevates my energy. It's like I am purposefully finding things that I'm proud of, things that I'm excited about, things that I've shown up for, ways that I've modeled the behavior in front of people, hard things I've gotten through, like these kind of things. And when I remind myself of that, I actually get to take that energy into anything that I do next. And so when you think about gratitude, gratitude is kind of like pointing your brain in the direction of a different energy. And when you step into that energy, anything that you do after that is with a high energy state. Scrolling social media or like the news, like it's all focused on the negative, broken, wrong, or missing, that kind of stuff, right? So it's very easy to get out of bed and then just start getting bombarded by all of this stuff. And then you just don't realize it, but you're bringing that negative energy into everything that you're doing. And of course, nothing's gonna work when you're bringing that negative energy into something you want to create, right? And so it's just tactically, it makes sense. But the second thing is when I first learned about coaching, my coach taught me this philosophy of life is 50 50. Okay. Life is 50-50. So you're going to have 50% of life experiences that are quote unquote positive and 50% of life experiences that are quote unquote negative. These are things that just happen in the world. Like you're going to wake up one day and you're going to have a new client or something positive. Somebody's going to say something positive to you, right? But at the same time, one day you're going to wake up, somebody's going to have a diagnosis. You're going to wake up and your back's going to hurt. You're going to tweak your muscle when you're playing basketball. Like, this is just the way that life works. Everybody has to feel seen. I feel seen right now. So everybody has their version of 50-50, right? The thing though is if we're constantly focused on the 50% of life that sucks, it makes it feel like our life is worse than it actually is. But when you're focused on the 50% of life that excites you and like lights you up, you increase your odds to be able to go out and now find more of the positive stuff that's going on. I love that. Yes. Yeah. It's crazy how you do that. You're like, wow, I didn't even realize like this thing over here, I'm so thankful for it. And you don't realize it. But now, because your brain is like looking and scanning for it because you made yourself do it in the morning time, that you actually find more of that, right? So when you think about the energy that this brings you, that's really why I do it. And for me personally, I just keep it super simple. I just think about what are three things that I'm really thankful for that I didn't actually write out yesterday. I don't repeat the same stuff over again. I say, okay, what am I so thankful for today? I'm thankful for my team being able to have Kurt and Aaron and Teresa and people out there on this mission who want to not only make a huge impact in their life, but they're hard-centered and they want to do the best that they can at helping others, right? And I get to work with people like that. I get to be around you guys, have conversations. I'm like, I am so freaking thankful for that, right? And they'll be like, you know what? I'm thankful that we have AC in our house. It's Los Angeles. It's freaking hot right now. And like there's people who have to be outside working. I used to be a police officer in a black outfit, like on the corner in 115 degrees, directing traffic around a crime scene. I don't have to do that anymore. And I'm like, I am so thankful just having AC. And it's funny, but like in the moment I feel it in my bones, I'm like, man, that used to suck when I used to do that. Okay. So grumpy as hell, then we're still like, no wonder, wow. But like being it, being able to like tap into this, like anything that I approached that day, it's just I approach it with a different energy, right? And that energy is like the energy of being thankful for what it is that I have. Because, like you said, when I'm thankful for what I have, I tend to get more and to find more things out in the world to focus on, which helps increase my energy and actually helps me attract more of that. So that's kind of what I do in terms of gratitude.

SPEAKER_02 24:34

I love that. Like you do get what you're looking for, you find what you're looking for. My grandmother used to say this. By the way, I still have to do that um coffee table book of my grandmother saying your grandma is a genius.

SPEAKER_00 24:47

Every single time you share a quote, I'm like, oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_02 24:51

And one of the things she used to say is um you have two eyes and they're both on the front of your head because you get what you're looking for. If you're focusing on what's broken, wrong, or missing, you're gonna get more of that because it's what you're looking for. If you're grateful for what you already have and you're a good steward of that, you're going to become blessed with more. And it is the truth

Confidence Versus Self-Confidence Explained

SPEAKER_02 25:12

that I found all the time. I give you guys a perfect example. You ever buy a new car, a Jeep, for example, in my case? I never thought about a Jeep until I bought one. Then when I bought one, I see them all the time now, everywhere. Because the part of my brain is looking for them. You know, because you look for the validation. Oh, did I make a good choice? How many things on the road? I see them all the time now. I feel like half the half the world is jeeps. You get what you're looking for. So lean into your gratitude. Lean into the things that you have going for you. A lot of people, they focus. I don't know why that is, man, but we really tend to focus on what's broken, wrong, or missing rather than being grateful for what we do have, who we do have, the skills, the abilities, the talents, the opportunities, the relationships, all these things. Your life is full of blessings. And you're just looking past them looking for the problems. Guess what? If you're looking for the problems, you're gonna find.

SPEAKER_00 26:10

Indeed. I remember I used to have a mentor who said most of our thoughts are based off of the past or our memories. And if we're living in the past and in our memories, it's so easy for our brain to keep us safe by focusing on what's broken, wrong, or missing. And you can't change anything in terms of the memories or the past, right? He also used to say, like, some of the memories you have, some of the good memories, they actually were not as good as you made them feel right now, just thinking about them. But the opposite's true too. You make them way worse from the past, but like they actually weren't as bad. It's like you kind of like go either direction. So, like, that's not a place that I want to live. I want to live right now because it's the only time. And also a little bit in the future. What am I gonna create today? What am I gonna put out into the world, right? The past we really can't do much with. I mean, a lot of times we try to change it, but it's not gonna ever change, right?

SPEAKER_02 26:56

We're not heading that way. We're heading into the future. Well, we got two eyes on the front of our head, really? On the front of our head, like Jeannie would say. Stop looking behind you. You're not going that way. That is genius. Oh man. All of this does go to self-leadership. And we have definitely hit people with a lot in this episode. So before I get into my closing thought, I'd like to give people the opportunity to learn more about how they can lean into their self-leadership so that these thoughts become natural. It's not like every time somebody has a problem, they're gonna pop this podcast and like, oh no, that might not be a bad idea. Play it as many times as you like. But it may not be practical. So the point is we want to help you guys see life in a different way. And to do that, this opportunity is something that I'm going to take advantage of myself. I will be in the self-leadership lab myself. So if you guys want to get in there and make fun of me for something silly I've said on this podcast, feel free. But I'm gonna let Mark tell you guys about the self-leadership lab because I think it's really important that we learn how to see the world differently, how to think about things differently, and increase our capacity.

SPEAKER_00 28:10

Thank you. Thank you for like giving me the opportunity to share a little bit about it. So I was working with a one-on-one client recently, and I started to teach him about this whole idea of like being able to lead and coach himself. And one of the things that he said is, first off, Mark, why don't they teach us this in school? But the second thing is he's like, you know what? I think what you taught me is you taught me how successful people think. He said, I did not have that piece. And I've been in a space where I teach people how to coach and how to influence other people's thoughts and perspectives, but I've never really taught anything that teaches people how I do that for myself. So if you look at this example of this podcast, okay, if anything has been an aha moment for you, what would it look like if you could do this for yourself? Not just like on the easy days, not just on, hey, everything is going well, but when the stuff hits the fan, when everything feels like it's falling apart, when the whirlwind of life is coming up. What if you learned how to reframe this in a way that got you to step into the best version of you, to show them what you're capable of, and to build up not only your capacity, but your skill of doing hard things, not just when things are easy, but when they're hard. So that's what we've done is we've created a 60-day program that's actually going to be live training. There's four different things that I do through this process to help me be able to reframe, to be able to find a different thought, belief, story,

Gratitude Practice And Self-Leadership Lab

SPEAKER_00 29:31

and really change how I show up, not just when things are easy, but when things are hard. Because when you show up when things are hard, people will naturally gravitate towards you and they'll want to do something with you. Because you're not just telling them what to do, you're showing it yourself because you are exceptional at being able to lead yourself. And so that's what we're gonna be doing in the program.

SPEAKER_02 29:51

I love this. More information in the show notes on the self-leadership lab. We'll have the link. All that information for you guys, definitely take advantage of this. I think it's gonna be an awesome program. I'm looking forward to it. I'm gonna be better for it. And it starts on my birthday.

unknown 30:07

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 30:08

Every day, July 6th. Yes. Check out the show notes for more information. And thank you, Mark, for building that program. I think it's gonna be a great thing.

SPEAKER_01 30:17

Appreciate it, man.

SPEAKER_02 30:18

All right, guys. Here's the closing thought for the episode. Capacity is not only financial, it includes emotional, mental, leadership, and relationship capacity. So stop asking only for more and start asking how to become capable of more. Because success isn't just about what you receive, it's about what you can responsibly sustain. Love it, man. Love it. All right, more information in the show notes. Soft leadership lab, like I said, I'll be there myself. I'm so looking forward to it. Check out Overdrive Radio. If you guys need some motivation in the meantime, I'll have the links for all of the KLS properties in the show notes. And we'll see you guys on the next episode. See you then.