WEBVTT 00:00:37.119 --> 00:00:39.759 Visit life effect.net today. 00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:45.600 Father, we love you. 00:00:46.159 --> 00:00:49.280 We come before you so grateful today. 00:00:50.159 --> 00:00:54.320 Grateful for your teaching, for your leading. 00:00:54.880 --> 00:00:57.359 Grateful that you are a rewarder. 00:00:57.840 --> 00:01:00.880 And we seek you with our obedience. 00:01:01.039 --> 00:01:04.000 We seek you, Lord, with by acting on your word. 00:01:04.239 --> 00:01:06.640 We seek you by being doers. 00:01:06.879 --> 00:01:11.840 And we thank you, Lord, for the multiplication, for the increase of your blessing. 00:01:11.920 --> 00:01:15.040 And we thank you, Lord, for the light of your word to live by. 00:01:15.280 --> 00:01:16.640 In Jesus' name. 00:01:16.879 --> 00:01:17.439 Amen. 00:01:17.680 --> 00:01:19.040 Thank you, gentlemen. 00:01:19.359 --> 00:01:20.480 Praise God. 00:01:21.439 --> 00:01:30.400 Well, as I said, we are preparing our hearts for this assignment that God has for us concerning the harvest. 00:01:30.560 --> 00:01:34.400 And I want to begin today in Matthew chapter 13. 00:01:34.799 --> 00:01:36.480 Matthew chapter 13. 00:01:36.640 --> 00:01:43.760 And what a wonderful, wonderful service with Harry and Cheryl Salem on Wednesday. 00:01:43.920 --> 00:01:52.640 If you were not able to be here, I encourage you to go to the YouTube channel or listen to it again on the podcast because what an on-time word. 00:01:53.200 --> 00:02:01.519 And the the preparation and the knowledge of where we are in the plan of God is important for us. 00:02:01.760 --> 00:02:03.599 Matthew chapter 13. 00:02:03.840 --> 00:02:06.879 I want to look at verses 38 and 39. 00:02:08.639 --> 00:02:10.240 38 and 39. 00:02:10.800 --> 00:02:13.599 The field is the world. 00:02:14.159 --> 00:02:20.479 The good seed are the children of the kingdom, but the tares are the children of the wicked one. 00:02:20.719 --> 00:02:23.520 The enemy that sowed them is the devil. 00:02:23.680 --> 00:02:29.360 The harvest is the end of the world, and the reapers are the angels. 00:02:29.759 --> 00:02:32.879 We've been talking about having a harvest heart. 00:02:33.039 --> 00:02:37.039 We've been learning how to be salt and light. 00:02:37.280 --> 00:02:55.280 We've been learning about the responsibility of influence, the influence of the light to drive back and dispel the darkness, the influence of the salt to be preservers in the earth and to help bring people to a place of rescue. 00:02:55.599 --> 00:03:13.280 And we recognize that Jesus uses the imagery of a harvest when he's talking about the people being brought out of the kingdom of darkness and into the kingdom of God. 00:03:13.759 --> 00:03:44.719 We see throughout Scripture this idea of a harvest being a harvest of souls, a harvest of lives, a harvest of people, of people being of such great value that our Father desires to reap the people and bring them into a place where they are rescued and saved from the situations and the darkness of this world. 00:03:44.879 --> 00:04:05.199 And so when we see that the field is the world, it helps us to understand the importance of what we say and do, how we live our lives, the influence that we have in our family, the influence we have in our neighborhood. 00:04:05.520 --> 00:04:11.120 You can't save everybody, but you can sow the gospel seed where you are. 00:04:11.360 --> 00:04:23.759 You don't have to take on the responsibility of saving the whole world, but you can take the responsibility to share with those who you have connection with, those who you know. 00:04:24.000 --> 00:04:33.759 And you don't have to, again, take responsibility for the end result of their life, but just take responsibility for your part, which is sow the seed. 00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:35.680 Share the testimony. 00:04:35.920 --> 00:04:38.800 Tell somebody what he's done for you. 00:04:39.120 --> 00:04:45.199 And that telling of the testimony, that sharing of the seed, God knows how to make seed grow. 00:04:45.439 --> 00:04:56.720 He's the one who causes the seed to get into the heart and get that seed to produce a life change in a person's life. 00:04:56.959 --> 00:05:07.279 And one of the things that I want us to see is the eternity, the eternal aspect, the emphasis that God sees. 00:05:07.439 --> 00:05:09.120 I want us to see it from his heart. 00:05:09.279 --> 00:05:30.000 I want us to have an understanding of a bigger picture because it can become easy to just get focused on the moment, get focused on your life, get focused on the responsibilities you have for tomorrow, get focused on the pressure that you're facing and lose the bigger picture. 00:05:30.240 --> 00:05:54.480 But when we see a bigger picture, when we can look at the panoramic view from the perspective of God, we'll see outside of time, we'll see the desire of God to bring as many people who will choose Jesus as Lord out of the destiny of being separated from God. 00:05:54.879 --> 00:06:10.959 You know, this helped me because before I was born again, uh I had no concept or understanding about a person being eternal in their being. 00:06:11.279 --> 00:06:17.600 And I just thought, well, you know, those who don't go to heaven are just going to die, like cease to exist. 00:06:17.680 --> 00:06:19.120 But that's not true. 00:06:19.519 --> 00:06:22.560 Everybody will live forever somewhere. 00:06:28.480 --> 00:06:33.120 Everybody will live forever somewhere. 00:06:33.519 --> 00:06:58.240 During this season on the earth, during this moment on the earth, we have the opportunity to choose Jesus, and by choosing Jesus, enter into eternity forever connected to God in his presence, in his kingdom, living forever with him. 00:06:58.800 --> 00:07:13.519 But for those who refuse to accept Jesus as Lord, for those who choose to deny the sacrifice that Jesus made for them, they will live forever, but not with God. 00:07:14.319 --> 00:07:15.680 Separated from God. 00:07:15.839 --> 00:07:23.199 And in this chapter, Jesus in verse 42 describes that separation. 00:07:23.600 --> 00:07:26.879 He describes what will happen to those people. 00:07:27.360 --> 00:07:32.399 It says, they shall cast them into a furnace of fire. 00:07:32.639 --> 00:07:36.720 There shall be wailing and gnashing of teeth. 00:07:37.519 --> 00:07:39.439 How horrible. 00:07:41.120 --> 00:07:42.879 How terrifying. 00:07:43.839 --> 00:07:45.839 A furnace of fire? 00:07:46.959 --> 00:07:47.920 Wailing? 00:07:48.480 --> 00:07:49.600 Gnashing of teeth? 00:07:49.680 --> 00:07:52.959 I've never seen gnashing of teeth, but can you picture it? 00:07:53.600 --> 00:08:05.360 Gnashing of teeth, which is evidently such a pain, such a an expression of terror and pain. 00:08:11.439 --> 00:08:12.959 This is truth. 00:08:14.639 --> 00:08:28.639 Last year I had a television interview at PTL, and the it was at a time when there was some teaching going on that hell wasn't real. 00:08:29.120 --> 00:08:34.799 And without any preparation, without any clue that they were going to do this, the cameras came on. 00:08:34.960 --> 00:08:36.799 We are live nationwide. 00:08:37.039 --> 00:08:43.360 And the host turns to me and he says, Have you heard this doctrine that's being teached that hell isn't real? 00:08:43.600 --> 00:08:46.000 What do you think about that, Pastor? 00:08:47.519 --> 00:08:50.960 And I thank you for the Holy Spirit, right? 00:08:51.519 --> 00:08:55.759 Because I hadn't really, usually my husband answers those questions. 00:08:56.879 --> 00:09:01.840 Usually my husband, he's the he's the sermonator, he's got the answer, right? 00:09:02.080 --> 00:09:04.879 But the Holy Spirit put an answer in my mouth. 00:09:05.039 --> 00:09:08.559 And because in that moment when I thought, how do you answer? 00:09:08.639 --> 00:09:13.279 What do you say to people who are saying hell isn't real? 00:09:13.519 --> 00:09:15.840 Because that's a demonic doctrine. 00:09:16.080 --> 00:09:23.120 That's something that the devil is propagating to bring people to a place of it's not important. 00:09:23.679 --> 00:09:38.879 That it's not, it's if hell isn't real, if hell is just a makeup, made-up story, if hell is just a fantasy that these Christians have, then what else isn't real, right? 00:09:39.440 --> 00:09:54.240 But what really became apparent to me in the way the Holy Spirit told me to answer that was to say hell isn't real is to take what Jesus did and make it so little and insignificant. 00:09:57.200 --> 00:10:04.159 Because everything he did was to rescue us from a separation with God. 00:10:05.039 --> 00:10:22.639 When we realize that forgiveness of sin, forgiveness of sin is an important part of our redemption, but it's not the most important part. 00:10:23.919 --> 00:10:29.919 The most important part was to change our nature back to a divine nature. 00:10:30.639 --> 00:10:35.679 Because when Adam sinned and they fell, they died spiritually. 00:10:36.480 --> 00:10:38.320 That was the big problem. 00:10:38.720 --> 00:10:41.840 The spiritual death became their nature. 00:10:42.000 --> 00:10:43.919 They were dead in sin. 00:10:44.399 --> 00:10:56.159 And we all, coming after the lineage of Adam, were born in sin, born in a condition that God did not create us to be in. 00:10:56.399 --> 00:11:00.399 A condition different than the condition God created for us. 00:11:00.639 --> 00:11:03.600 God created us to be alive unto Him. 00:11:03.919 --> 00:11:11.600 He created us with the ability to have spirits who could interact and commune and relate with God. 00:11:11.759 --> 00:11:24.720 And when Adam and Eve sinned, yes, the sin and the forgiveness of sin being a major part of our redemption, but it's if that was the only part, it wouldn't fix the problem. 00:11:25.039 --> 00:11:30.639 If the only thing we had was forgiveness of sin, we'd still be in the same dilemma. 00:11:30.960 --> 00:11:35.360 And the dilemma was that we were dead spiritually. 00:11:35.600 --> 00:11:38.480 The spiritual death became the issue. 00:11:38.799 --> 00:11:42.960 Because of the spiritual death, sin entered. 00:11:43.200 --> 00:11:48.639 And because of the spiritual death, the relationship with God became limited. 00:11:49.360 --> 00:11:55.519 When Adam and Eve were alive unto God, they could talk with him, they could walk with him, they could commune with him. 00:11:55.919 --> 00:11:57.440 That's his desire. 00:11:58.000 --> 00:11:59.600 That's his desire. 00:12:00.399 --> 00:12:10.799 That's his desire for you to walk with him, to be a part of his family, to love him and receive the love he has for you. 00:12:10.960 --> 00:12:12.000 That's the desire. 00:12:12.240 --> 00:12:15.679 But that spiritual death disconnected them. 00:12:15.919 --> 00:12:20.799 And God became limited in his interaction with them. 00:12:20.960 --> 00:12:24.159 And he had to cover them with the blood of the animals. 00:12:24.399 --> 00:12:37.120 He had to provide a blood covering that would be a temporary covering until the appropriate, accurate blood could be presented that would solve the problem. 00:12:38.000 --> 00:12:54.879 So when Jesus provided redemption, he not only became the blood of the Lamb poured out to wash away our sin, but he also gave his life. 00:12:58.080 --> 00:13:06.159 He suffered the necessary punishment so that the peace of God could be restored to our life. 00:13:06.720 --> 00:13:14.000 The necessary punishment of death, because the wages of sin is death. 00:13:14.320 --> 00:13:27.039 He died so that you can receive Jesus as Lord and make this great exchange, giving up your death and receiving his life. 00:13:29.279 --> 00:13:31.519 That was the bigger picture. 00:13:31.840 --> 00:13:36.000 And the forgiveness of sins is a part of that. 00:13:36.879 --> 00:13:53.840 But without the new life, without the new life, without the spirit being changed from death to life, the forgiveness of sin would just be another covering. 00:13:54.080 --> 00:13:56.240 That's what they had under the Old Testament. 00:13:56.639 --> 00:14:04.799 They were sinners by nature who had a blood covering that would give them an approach to God. 00:14:05.120 --> 00:14:07.200 God was still on that side. 00:14:07.519 --> 00:14:09.679 God was still limited in their life. 00:14:09.919 --> 00:14:12.240 It was like having to visit their child. 00:14:13.039 --> 00:14:16.559 Anybody ever had to go visit somebody in jail or in prison? 00:14:16.879 --> 00:14:27.519 And you have to talk to them through a glass, and you have to talk either through a little hole in the glass or through an old telephone that you can hardly hear through. 00:14:27.759 --> 00:14:33.279 And you can't touch them, you can't hug them, you can't commune with them. 00:14:33.440 --> 00:14:34.320 It's limited. 00:14:34.399 --> 00:14:37.919 That was God's interaction with man under the old covenant. 00:14:38.000 --> 00:14:39.279 That was his limits. 00:14:40.080 --> 00:14:41.840 He was held at a distance. 00:14:42.159 --> 00:14:50.159 But glory for the blood of the Lamb that redeemed us, not just forgave us of our sins. 00:14:50.320 --> 00:14:51.759 Yes, it includes that. 00:14:52.000 --> 00:14:56.639 But he also redeemed us by bringing us back to life. 00:14:56.799 --> 00:14:58.320 We are now alive unto God. 00:14:58.399 --> 00:15:10.399 If any man be in Christ, behold, he is a new creature, a new creature born of God, alive unto God. 00:15:10.559 --> 00:15:14.639 The life of God now lives and dwells and abides in you. 00:15:14.799 --> 00:15:18.399 You are now, you are now the holy of holies. 00:15:18.720 --> 00:15:22.399 Know ye not that you are the naos, the temple of God? 00:15:23.919 --> 00:15:26.799 That word is the holiest of holies. 00:15:27.279 --> 00:15:29.440 Don't you know you're the holy place? 00:15:29.600 --> 00:15:34.559 You are the holy of holies, you are the dwelling place of the Spirit of God. 00:15:34.960 --> 00:15:36.240 Hallelujah. 00:15:38.559 --> 00:15:55.600 This is necessary for us to come out of the destiny that we were born into and enter into the destiny that God desires for us. 00:15:56.320 --> 00:16:01.679 To accept Jesus as Lord is to receive of his sacrifice. 00:16:01.919 --> 00:16:28.720 To accept Jesus as Lord is to believe that he died for me, to believe that he purchased my life, freeing me from the wages of sin, freeing me from the past, and providing me a place in his kingdom. 00:16:30.480 --> 00:16:36.080 It's necessary for every person to make that decision. 00:16:37.679 --> 00:16:51.759 For every person to exit this furnace destiny path and enter on enter into the path that leads to his kingdom, his throne. 00:16:52.000 --> 00:16:53.120 Hallelujah. 00:16:54.000 --> 00:17:14.640 When I look back at how I believed before Christ. 00:17:24.319 --> 00:17:26.480 How many people got saved when you were young? 00:17:27.039 --> 00:17:28.160 Got saved as kids. 00:17:28.480 --> 00:17:29.920 You were raised in church. 00:17:30.240 --> 00:17:35.599 It might have been a long time since you remember what it was like before you were a believer. 00:17:36.079 --> 00:17:38.559 Before you believed, before you knew. 00:17:52.880 --> 00:17:54.160 So behind. 00:17:54.799 --> 00:17:57.039 I had to do a lot of catching up. 00:17:58.079 --> 00:18:05.440 But to recognize how people think, anybody else just look at the news and say, what are people thinking? 00:18:06.720 --> 00:18:08.400 Are you kidding me? 00:18:10.240 --> 00:18:10.640 Why? 00:18:10.880 --> 00:18:12.559 Because they're in the dark. 00:18:12.960 --> 00:18:15.680 They are in the dark. 00:18:17.279 --> 00:18:19.759 And I remember what it was like to be in the dark. 00:18:19.920 --> 00:18:21.599 I can look back and I remember. 00:18:21.759 --> 00:18:30.799 I remember the day that um it was the day before we were going. 00:18:30.960 --> 00:18:34.480 Now y'all know my testimony. 00:18:34.799 --> 00:18:37.119 Y'all know my testimony, it's okay. 00:18:37.599 --> 00:18:45.519 The day before I was going to face the judge for the attempted armed robberies that I was being charged with. 00:18:46.559 --> 00:18:51.359 My first husband had committed the armed robberies. 00:18:52.000 --> 00:18:56.640 And so he he and I had to go on the same court date. 00:18:57.279 --> 00:19:05.279 And the day before was a Sunday, and he had promised his grandmother he would go to church with her. 00:19:06.079 --> 00:19:12.000 And the kids all came in begging me, mommy, mommy, mommy, go to church with us, go to church with us. 00:19:12.160 --> 00:19:14.880 And I said, I'm not going to church. 00:19:15.119 --> 00:19:16.079 No, no. 00:19:16.559 --> 00:19:22.640 I and then I, you know, I made jokes, you know, the the walls will cave in, you know, lightning will strike. 00:19:22.799 --> 00:19:25.039 I I was, you know, making light of it. 00:19:25.119 --> 00:19:28.240 But on the inside, I thought, God hates me. 00:19:28.480 --> 00:19:29.839 Why would I go to church? 00:19:30.000 --> 00:19:31.200 God hates me. 00:19:32.400 --> 00:19:34.240 I can't go to church. 00:19:34.559 --> 00:19:39.440 I've prostituted on the street that those people drive by to get to that church building. 00:19:40.000 --> 00:19:41.839 I can't go to church. 00:19:43.119 --> 00:19:49.200 With my arrest record, they're not gonna let me in that church. 00:19:50.079 --> 00:19:52.079 That was the way I believed. 00:19:52.880 --> 00:19:54.720 Well, he went to church that day. 00:19:55.039 --> 00:19:56.160 He got saved that day. 00:19:56.319 --> 00:20:00.640 He walked the aisles and gave his heart to Jesus and came back and wanted me to read the Bible to him. 00:20:00.720 --> 00:20:01.759 He couldn't read. 00:20:02.079 --> 00:20:03.680 And made me read the Bible to him. 00:20:03.759 --> 00:20:07.920 And I was like, I was I was under protest reading the Bible to him. 00:20:08.319 --> 00:20:09.759 I don't want to read the Bible. 00:20:09.839 --> 00:20:11.039 And he had questions. 00:20:11.200 --> 00:20:12.640 What is this being filled with the Spirit? 00:20:12.720 --> 00:20:13.759 What is this speaking in tongues? 00:20:13.920 --> 00:20:14.319 What is this? 00:20:14.480 --> 00:20:14.880 What is this? 00:20:15.039 --> 00:20:17.839 And he was he was it was different. 00:20:18.079 --> 00:20:34.720 And the next morning we go into the courtroom, and someone motions to him, a friend of his comes up, and I thought, well, how nice of this friend to come and and you know wish him well. 00:20:34.960 --> 00:20:36.799 And a few minutes later we couldn't find him. 00:20:36.880 --> 00:20:38.000 Like, where'd they go? 00:20:38.799 --> 00:20:43.839 And look around, and and so we found him on another floor coming out of the bathroom. 00:20:44.000 --> 00:20:49.039 And so I didn't realize it then, but this friend had brought him a patch. 00:20:49.200 --> 00:20:53.759 It was it was like a nicotine patch, but it was a morphine patch. 00:20:53.839 --> 00:20:55.119 It was filled with morphine. 00:20:55.200 --> 00:21:02.319 And it was it was when they first came out, and they were being uh still under beta, you know, still under testing. 00:21:02.480 --> 00:21:10.640 And so they it it had three days worth of morphine that was supposed to slow time release into his body. 00:21:10.720 --> 00:21:21.039 And his friend was being nice and thought if they take you into the the court today, if they take you into the prison today, you can sleep through the first three days of processing. 00:21:21.119 --> 00:21:36.079 And so the he he put the patch on and and and you know went on into the court and they did not take him into prison that day because he was out on bond, and they gave him a date to turn himself in. 00:21:36.160 --> 00:21:46.960 But he he pled guilty, and the charges were were brought against him and and the sentencing and all of that that took place. 00:21:47.200 --> 00:21:52.480 They released me uh and dropped the charges against me because of his plea bargain. 00:21:52.720 --> 00:21:55.359 And so my part was done there. 00:21:55.680 --> 00:21:59.759 But that night, those three days worth of morphine. 00:22:00.319 --> 00:22:02.559 Released into his body in one day. 00:22:03.680 --> 00:22:12.720 And in the night, it evidently had caused his diaphragm to paralyze and he wasn't breathing correctly. 00:22:12.880 --> 00:22:16.400 And in the morning, I thought he was snoring. 00:22:16.720 --> 00:22:19.440 I know now it was agonal breathing. 00:22:20.319 --> 00:22:25.759 I had never heard him snore before, and I was upset because he was high, and I wasn't the night before. 00:22:25.839 --> 00:22:28.880 And so he had promised me he was going to take me and get me high that day. 00:22:28.960 --> 00:22:31.119 And so I'm trying to wake him up. 00:22:31.359 --> 00:22:38.559 And we got all kinds of racket going on in there trying to wake him up running the vacuum cleaner, that that'll make him mad, that'll get him up, you know. 00:22:38.640 --> 00:22:47.599 And I'm letting the kids bang on the guitar over here and thinking that he's just sleeping hard because of this medicine. 00:22:48.000 --> 00:22:54.480 And I turned the vacuum cleaner off and I turned around and he was no longer breathing. 00:22:55.920 --> 00:22:58.720 And I began to scream for his grandmother. 00:22:59.279 --> 00:23:00.799 We were there at his grandmother's house. 00:23:00.880 --> 00:23:01.519 We were homeless. 00:23:01.599 --> 00:23:03.200 She'd let us move back in. 00:23:03.599 --> 00:23:16.640 I began to scream for her to call 911, and I tried to do CPR, but the bed was too soft, and so I'm trying to get him on the floor where I can do CPR. 00:23:17.039 --> 00:23:22.640 And uh the medics come in, we were right down the street from the fire department. 00:23:22.799 --> 00:23:33.920 They come rushing in and they uh they bring him back to the they start doing the CPR on him in route to the hospital. 00:23:34.079 --> 00:23:37.920 They were able to get him his heart to beating again. 00:23:38.240 --> 00:23:44.319 But by the when we got to the hospital, they took me into a room and a counselor came in. 00:23:44.559 --> 00:23:46.000 And I thought, that's weird. 00:23:46.079 --> 00:23:48.319 I I should be seeing a doctor, not a counselor. 00:23:48.960 --> 00:23:50.000 Where's the doctors? 00:23:50.079 --> 00:23:54.240 And and they said, Well, they did get him resuscitated, and I thought, well, good. 00:23:54.319 --> 00:23:56.319 I I thought that's it, you know, good. 00:23:57.279 --> 00:24:01.119 That's over, we can go on, and he'll be okay in a day or two. 00:24:01.359 --> 00:24:12.559 But they said, no, ma'am, he's not brain functioning, and so they ended up having to put him on machines. 00:24:14.319 --> 00:24:38.960 And we're in the ICU, he's on machines that are helping him breathe and helping his heart beat, and people start coming to the uh the ICU unit with needles and cocaine and dilauded, and I've got myself in the bathroom getting high. 00:24:41.839 --> 00:24:46.000 And the guy who had prayed with him the day before shows up. 00:24:46.559 --> 00:24:48.400 The guy from the church. 00:24:48.799 --> 00:24:54.720 I've got cocaine in my pocket, I've got a syringe in my shoe, somebody had just come and brought this to me. 00:24:54.880 --> 00:24:58.960 I'd done delauded earlier that day, which is kind of like a heroin. 00:24:59.599 --> 00:25:05.359 And and this preacher wants to talk to me. 00:25:05.519 --> 00:25:08.400 And I thought, I don't want to hear what the preacher has to say. 00:25:08.640 --> 00:25:11.759 I don't want to, but he was so pushy. 00:25:12.960 --> 00:25:15.279 Not in a mean way, not in a rude way. 00:25:15.440 --> 00:25:18.240 And he didn't look like a preacher either, can I tell you that? 00:25:18.559 --> 00:25:24.240 He had a ponytail, he had a big Dakes Bible, he was a biker. 00:25:24.400 --> 00:25:27.359 And I thought, what kind of preacher did this church send? 00:25:27.519 --> 00:25:30.079 First, I'm going to be critical, you know, what kind of preacher is this? 00:25:30.160 --> 00:25:32.480 And the next thing I'm like, I don't want to go talk to the preacher. 00:25:32.640 --> 00:25:35.440 And he's like, no, come to the chapel with me. 00:25:35.599 --> 00:25:36.880 Come to the chapel with me. 00:25:36.960 --> 00:25:42.240 I didn't want to go to the chapel, but I finally relented and I went to the chapel with him. 00:25:42.480 --> 00:25:50.960 And we're sitting in the chapel, and he is talking to me about the fact that Jesus died on the cross for me. 00:25:54.480 --> 00:26:00.640 He would not let me give him yes and no answers and dismiss him and get this over with. 00:26:00.799 --> 00:26:01.759 I tried. 00:26:02.160 --> 00:26:04.880 I tried to just yes, whatever, whatever. 00:26:04.960 --> 00:26:05.359 Uh-huh. 00:26:05.519 --> 00:26:06.720 Okay, fine, thank you. 00:26:06.960 --> 00:26:07.759 You can go now. 00:26:07.839 --> 00:26:08.400 I tried that. 00:26:08.559 --> 00:26:10.400 He wouldn't let me get away with that. 00:26:10.559 --> 00:26:19.519 He just kept talking to me and he kept interacting in a way that made me respond with a sentence or made me respond with something personal. 00:26:19.759 --> 00:26:22.559 And he presented the gospel. 00:26:22.640 --> 00:26:28.079 Now, I was I was raised in in Nashville, Tennessee. 00:26:28.799 --> 00:26:32.559 Right there in the buckle of the Bible belt. 00:26:32.960 --> 00:26:46.480 I was raised, my grandparents, I had been to church with them a little bit when I was younger, but I had never taken personal what Jesus did. 00:26:47.680 --> 00:26:56.880 Until that conversation, I cannot say that I ever considered personally that Jesus had died for me. 00:26:57.599 --> 00:27:08.319 That what he did on the cross, that and and it sounds clicheic, but when he said it to me, I'd never heard it before, and it caught my attention. 00:27:08.640 --> 00:27:15.200 He said, if you were the only person alive on the earth, he would have died for you. 00:27:16.400 --> 00:27:33.440 Now that sounds clicheic to us today, but at that moment, it was what brought it into perspective for me personally, and that's why it it we have to help people see God's love for them personally. 00:27:34.160 --> 00:27:39.359 We have to let them see that it's not just a blanket, it's for you. 00:27:40.480 --> 00:27:49.119 It's not just something that is touching others, it's to meant to touch you. 00:27:50.079 --> 00:28:05.680 And in that conversation, I didn't get a big revelation, I didn't get this huge moment where light came flooding in and I was gloriously saved completely in that moment. 00:28:05.839 --> 00:28:08.720 I got a little tiny glimmer of hope. 00:28:09.920 --> 00:28:15.119 It was just like a little light coming under the door into the dark room. 00:28:16.319 --> 00:28:27.039 And I remember that glimmer of hope made me say, if God would help me, because that's the first time I believed he would. 00:28:27.759 --> 00:28:30.400 If God would help me, I need help. 00:28:30.640 --> 00:28:33.200 Anybody needs help, I need help. 00:28:34.640 --> 00:28:38.000 If God would help me, I need help. 00:28:40.000 --> 00:28:49.759 And if you've read my testimony, Escaping Hell, you know by this time I had been so deep in that, what I call an emotional coma. 00:28:51.039 --> 00:29:02.079 The pain of the life that I had lived, the pain of the decisions that I'd made, the pain of my failures and my shame. 00:29:02.720 --> 00:29:06.720 I just I lived to escape it. 00:29:07.279 --> 00:29:13.839 I lived every day trying to escape me, trying to escape the decisions I've made, the life that I'd made. 00:29:14.720 --> 00:29:17.039 I made a declaration one day. 00:29:17.200 --> 00:29:19.680 I will never be sober another day in my life. 00:29:19.759 --> 00:29:28.960 And every morning, if I couldn't get a hold of enough money to get high, I would drink a bottle of Nyquil. 00:29:29.200 --> 00:29:33.200 I'd do whatever I could just to escape reality. 00:29:37.599 --> 00:29:43.599 And that little glimmer of hope is what I prayed with. 00:29:44.240 --> 00:29:51.200 It wasn't a big revelation, it was it wasn't a huge, wide open door for God. 00:29:51.279 --> 00:29:54.799 It was, God, if you would help me, I need your help. 00:29:54.960 --> 00:29:56.319 Please help me. 00:29:56.960 --> 00:30:08.079 And so I prayed with him, not realizing fully what I know about Jesus today, but realizing I'm asking for God's help. 00:30:10.799 --> 00:30:19.759 I went down to the emergency room, bathroom, locked myself in the bathroom to do the drugs that I had on my possession, and couldn't feel a thing. 00:30:20.079 --> 00:30:21.359 I was so furious. 00:30:21.440 --> 00:30:22.000 I was mad. 00:30:22.319 --> 00:30:25.599 I was like, I called the drug dealer and said, What have you brought to me? 00:30:26.160 --> 00:30:27.839 I couldn't feel a thing. 00:30:29.920 --> 00:30:37.759 Some months later, I came across the scripture in the Bible that said, You're snared by the words of your mouth, and God said, That's why you couldn't feel anything. 00:30:37.839 --> 00:30:39.279 You had cut a covenant with me. 00:30:39.440 --> 00:30:46.240 You'd open the door for me to help you, and the way I could help you the most was by making that of no effect to you that day. 00:30:46.960 --> 00:31:06.960 And so that prayer opened the door so that a few months later, after we had taken the machines off of my first husband, and he had passed, and we had laid him to rest, and my life was going out of control. 00:31:07.920 --> 00:31:13.519 And I found myself in the back of a bar doing drugs three days nonstop. 00:31:15.119 --> 00:31:20.559 And I put the needle in my arm, and when I did, I left my body. 00:31:25.839 --> 00:31:38.000 But I was standing in front of a skull, it wasn't a whole skeleton, but it was a skull that was as tall as I am. 00:31:39.279 --> 00:31:50.880 And as I stood in front of this skull, I was more aware than I have ever been in my life that hell was real. 00:31:52.079 --> 00:31:56.079 If you had asked me before, I would have laughed about hell. 00:31:56.240 --> 00:31:58.000 I made jokes about hell. 00:31:58.160 --> 00:32:02.079 We sang songs about being on the highway to hell. 00:32:02.960 --> 00:32:06.000 We talked about partying in hell with the devil. 00:32:06.160 --> 00:32:19.200 It was, I look back at the ridiculousness of some of the things that I thought concerning hell because in that moment I realized hell is real. 00:32:20.400 --> 00:32:32.880 I was so clear, I was so aware, I was so spiritually aware in that moment that hell was real and I still had the opportunity to escape it. 00:32:33.279 --> 00:32:43.119 And I began at that moment because hands began to reach out of the darkness, it was as if the darkness had hands. 00:32:43.279 --> 00:32:48.079 They weren't black hands, it was darkness reaching for me. 00:32:48.319 --> 00:32:57.119 And those hands began to try to grasp me and pull me in, and in that moment I turned and ran back to my body. 00:32:57.519 --> 00:33:13.279 And when I got back into my body, the person who was doing CPR on me is one minute trying to get me to breathe and my heart to beat, and the next minute I'm screaming, I'm kicking, I'm I'm clawing because I was trying to escape. 00:33:14.160 --> 00:33:31.680 And he let me up, and I jumped up out of the back of that bar and I began running, and it was in the projects of East Nashville, and I ran about two blocks in the rain with the blood dripping down my arm before I realized that I was back in my body. 00:33:35.920 --> 00:33:38.079 And I went to church that night. 00:33:38.319 --> 00:33:40.160 That was a Sunday morning. 00:33:40.480 --> 00:33:52.640 I went to church that night, the same church that my first husband had gone to, the same church where my children went to church, where his grandmother went to church, and they didn't quite know how to handle me. 00:33:52.799 --> 00:33:54.400 I don't think they knew what to do with me. 00:33:54.480 --> 00:33:55.599 I sat on the front row. 00:33:55.680 --> 00:34:06.559 I don't know what they preached, I don't know what they said, but the moment they closed the service and opened for prayer, I stood up and said, I died this morning, and I don't want to go to hell. 00:34:06.640 --> 00:34:07.519 Please help me. 00:34:07.680 --> 00:34:12.639 I didn't know about ask Jesus, I didn't know about the how to get saved. 00:34:12.800 --> 00:34:18.000 I just knew this was the only place that had said God was interested in helping me. 00:34:18.559 --> 00:34:28.559 And the people who had prayed with me at the hospital found out that I came that night, and they ended up coming to the house where I was and taking me to a revival that they were in. 00:34:28.639 --> 00:34:30.400 And it was in that revival. 00:34:30.719 --> 00:34:45.039 By this time, I'm trying to get myself off drugs because I don't want to go to hell, and so I'm I'm on a methadone program that caused me to total three cars, and I don't know where I left them, and I'm I'm trying to get off these drugs, but I can't keep myself awake. 00:34:45.119 --> 00:34:57.039 And so I'm sitting in church, and the first night in church I slept through it, and so they took me home, and the people who had brought me, they they kept me on their couch that night, because by this time I was really homeless living in my car. 00:34:57.199 --> 00:35:01.679 And they kept me on their couch that night and prayed over me all night. 00:35:01.760 --> 00:35:10.159 And the next night took me back to church, and I'm sitting there in church, and the preacher comes over and he wakes me up because again, I'm asleep. 00:35:10.320 --> 00:35:13.519 He wakes me up and he said, Girl, do you want help? 00:35:13.840 --> 00:35:18.960 And I I stood up and said, I do, I do, I want help. 00:35:19.199 --> 00:35:23.039 And he laid his hands on me and prayed for me. 00:35:23.119 --> 00:35:27.199 And when I woke up, I was mad because I thought that preacher knocked me down. 00:35:27.280 --> 00:35:29.039 What am I doing on the floor? 00:35:29.280 --> 00:35:34.159 I was and then I couldn't be mad anymore because I was realized I'm sober. 00:35:35.519 --> 00:35:38.559 All the anger went away when I I'm sober. 00:35:38.880 --> 00:35:42.880 I'm I'm free from that drug, I'm free. 00:35:43.360 --> 00:35:52.239 And August 10th, 1992, I officially accepted Jesus as my Lord. 00:35:54.719 --> 00:35:56.000 Glory to God. 00:36:01.840 --> 00:36:10.159 The difference in my life came as a result of the light in my life. 00:36:11.119 --> 00:36:16.800 I tried to be different before and could never fix my life. 00:36:17.360 --> 00:36:22.400 What made my life worth living was the light of God's word. 00:36:23.119 --> 00:36:30.400 The life of God came into me, and I could start living out of this life of God. 00:36:31.360 --> 00:36:34.239 Before that, I was dead in sin. 00:36:35.519 --> 00:36:41.760 And because of that condition of being death, every time everything I tried failed. 00:36:41.920 --> 00:36:53.039 Every time I tried to fix it, it didn't work because I was, you can't fix spiritual death unless you receive eternal life. 00:36:55.119 --> 00:36:56.400 Hell is real. 00:36:58.480 --> 00:37:00.960 It is punishment. 00:37:02.480 --> 00:37:05.840 It's not God's will that anybody go there. 00:37:06.559 --> 00:37:09.440 God desires for every person. 00:37:11.199 --> 00:37:27.679 No matter what they've done, no matter how they've lived, no matter the decisions they've made, if they will accept Jesus, if they will accept his sacrifice, if they will repent and accept the life of God, God will save them. 00:37:28.400 --> 00:37:34.320 He'll rescue them from this furnace of fire. 00:37:36.320 --> 00:37:37.360 Hallelujah. 00:37:37.840 --> 00:37:43.920 But they're not gonna know it without somebody making it personal. 00:37:45.199 --> 00:37:47.039 Without somebody making it personal. 00:37:47.199 --> 00:37:49.280 Go with me to Matthew chapter nine. 00:37:56.559 --> 00:38:01.280 Matthew chapter nine, I want to read verse 36 through 38. 00:38:01.679 --> 00:38:15.920 But when he saw the multitudes, he was moved with compassion on them, because they fainted and were scattered abroad, as sheep having no shepherd. 00:38:16.559 --> 00:38:20.559 And saith he unto his disciples, the harvest. 00:38:22.559 --> 00:38:26.320 He saw multitudes, and he calls them the harvest. 00:38:27.840 --> 00:38:33.440 He saw these people in the condition that they were in, and he saw a harvest. 00:38:34.000 --> 00:38:41.280 He said, The harvest truly is plenteous, but the laborers are few. 00:38:41.679 --> 00:38:52.079 Pray ye therefore, the Lord of the harvest, that he will send forth laborers into his harvest. 00:38:53.760 --> 00:39:04.800 So Jesus sees these people, he sees them, and the very first response or reaction he has is compassion. 00:39:06.320 --> 00:39:10.239 You and I need to have the same outlook. 00:39:10.880 --> 00:39:22.800 Not disgust, not comparing how dark they are in their thinking and how light we are, but thinking, I was once there. 00:39:23.360 --> 00:39:25.440 I was in that darkness. 00:39:26.079 --> 00:39:29.679 I love people who are walking in the dark. 00:39:30.000 --> 00:39:41.280 There's some people that I love in my life, and I look at their life and I know the way that they are living is because of the darkness they're walking in. 00:39:41.440 --> 00:39:42.719 But I love them. 00:39:43.199 --> 00:40:01.840 And the compassion of God overrides what we see, overrides the disgust with the decisions, overrides the things that that would cause us to want to pull back and compels us. 00:40:02.960 --> 00:40:04.400 They need light. 00:40:04.719 --> 00:40:06.000 They need the light of God. 00:40:06.159 --> 00:40:07.599 They need the light I'm walking in. 00:40:07.679 --> 00:40:09.519 They need the light I'm living by. 00:40:09.840 --> 00:40:16.320 He saw them and his compassion was immediate. 00:40:16.559 --> 00:40:22.400 He was moved with compassion on them because he saw their condition. 00:40:22.639 --> 00:40:31.760 I want to give you a few of the different ways this word, when it says they were they were scattered abroad. 00:40:31.920 --> 00:40:34.639 This word scattered in different translations. 00:40:34.719 --> 00:40:36.559 I just pulled a few of them out. 00:40:36.880 --> 00:40:38.960 It says they were harassed. 00:40:39.599 --> 00:40:40.719 They were harassed. 00:40:40.800 --> 00:40:52.239 That makes me think of how Jesus was anointed by God, who went about doing good and healing all who were harassed by the devil. 00:40:52.719 --> 00:40:53.119 Right? 00:40:53.280 --> 00:40:54.880 These people were harassed. 00:40:55.039 --> 00:41:01.679 Another word that is used to translate this scattered is the word destitute. 00:41:02.320 --> 00:41:03.519 Destitute. 00:41:04.159 --> 00:41:07.760 Battered, overwhelmed. 00:41:10.559 --> 00:41:19.360 So he looked at their life and he could see the condition of their life, how destitute they were, how scattered they were in their life. 00:41:19.440 --> 00:41:25.840 They had no foundation, they had no purpose, they had no life. 00:41:26.800 --> 00:41:28.639 And he was moved. 00:41:28.800 --> 00:41:33.039 He compared it to a sheep that does not have a shepherd. 00:41:34.400 --> 00:41:38.960 None of us were created to live separate from God. 00:41:40.880 --> 00:41:47.440 The design of who you are fits with the design of who he is. 00:41:48.000 --> 00:41:49.519 He is our creator. 00:41:49.840 --> 00:41:52.239 We're not made to live without him. 00:41:52.639 --> 00:41:55.119 We're not made to do it on our own. 00:41:55.360 --> 00:41:58.719 We're not made to be an island unto ourselves. 00:41:59.119 --> 00:42:01.440 We're made to live with him. 00:42:03.360 --> 00:42:09.119 To fellowship with him, to be with him, to learn from him, to receive from him. 00:42:10.239 --> 00:42:14.239 But they were with no shepherd. 00:42:14.800 --> 00:42:21.760 To have no shepherd would be a person who has no guide, no direction for their life. 00:42:22.000 --> 00:42:23.599