Ep 10, Tea & Timtams, Dial up internet, to online dating.

From the dial up days, to internet these days, online dating, dating disasters and the importance of filling your own cup!

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:04

We're in a lovely little setup today, aren't we? Fucking hot, like. I know you've got a thick top on, like, I don't know how you do that. I'm so happy that I don't that I can wear like a vest like this and my shoulders are uncovered, because I feel like in a hot country it's horrible when you've got your shoulders uh covered, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03 0:21

Well I spent most of pretty much nearly every day without a shirt on and and minimal clothing.

SPEAKER_01 0:27

Oh, a blessing that blessing everyone who's eating them. I can't that rig.

SPEAKER_03 0:31

I know. No, it's just uh when you get hot you get a little bit agitated, and then any little bit of fabric on you, you just I just can't deal with the fab.

SPEAKER_01 0:40

I agree. Do you agree? I agree, I don't like the fab on the skin, you know. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_03 0:45

It's like at weddings, when you guys go to weddings, you get to wear all the free-flowing dresses and the air gets up and in amongst all. Or do you prefer to wear a dress? Wearing suits just steaming up. Well, no, what I'm just saying, just in general, your attire is more air flowing and free.

SPEAKER_01 1:00

And you know what we think about you in wet at weddings, you get to wear flat shoes and we have to wear heels all day.

SPEAKER_00 1:05

Oh, it goes both ways, doesn't it?

SPEAKER_01 1:07

And we have to wear makeup, you can't rub your face. Oh yeah. You can't get your hair done, all the money that you have to spend.

SPEAKER_03 1:12

Okay, okay, okay, I'll take it back. We've got a better, we've got the better end of the bargain.

SPEAKER_01 1:16

Oh, it's hilarious. I met this woman, didn't that?

SPEAKER_03 1:20

So Sydney and I are currently doing our um Indonesian handshake. It's our barley joke. It is an in-house joke, but if you want to sh I think we told him on the last pod, didn't we? Did we? Yeah, our local petrol lady when we're in in in Iluatu, where we went and got filled up our scooter with petrol, the lady there, are we keeping you up already? Sorry, Hum. Starts yawning at the start of the pod. It's not easy, it is it.

SPEAKER_00 1:41

I don't like it.

SPEAKER_03 1:42

This is just all too easy for me, isn't it? I get antsy and a bit bit agitated, you know, in the lead-up to a pod, and you're just, oh, it'll be good, yeah, we're sweet.

SPEAKER_00 1:50

Anyway, yeah, that bitch.

SPEAKER_03 1:52

She fills she was filling up the petrol and she always wants to shake Sidney's hand, not mine, doesn't want to know about me, always asks her name and ends up shaking your hand for the five. I think we did talk about it last week.

SPEAKER_01 2:02

I think we did talk about it last week, but yeah, how funny that we just keep doing that. Anyway, go on, give us your P and P for the week. You said I'm gonna be upset with this one. Are you sure I'm in the right frame of mind to take this, soften it, soften it.

SPEAKER_03 2:13

Okay. I'll stop.

SPEAKER_01 2:15

No, it's alright, give us your words.

SPEAKER_03 2:16

I'll soften it. So my P P this week is is Sydney eats her food so fucking fast. Like it's like you've grown up in a poor household of seven siblings and there's not much food in the middle of the table and you've all just got a scrounge for it. It's just and and you j you just it's not like any you don't scoff it like it doesn't look unattractive or um Sorry, I can't stop yawning. And um You're not boring me. You you you know you know that you eat too fast. Anyway, it's just uh sometimes it's just a little bit I want to say this, this is this is makes it a little a little challenging for me to enjoy a dinner. Like we've been going out for lots of nice dinners when we're away. At home I don't mind. You just like scram it, as you say. Smash it in, and then you sit down and you finish. Excuse me. And then you just keep talking to me, which is good, you don't whatever, wait for me to finish. But when we're out and we're having like nice dinners, it's just I feel like under pressure. And we're sharing, but then also you snatch a bit at the shared dishes. No, I do not feel like you snatchy a little bit.

SPEAKER_01 3:22

No That's because I'm an only child.

SPEAKER_03 3:25

Yeah, there's a lot of only child stuff that I just I've picked up with you. Uh and I tell I tell you it when I when I see it, don't I? I call it out. So that's just my little thing. You're just stuffing your fuck. I I don't and I just wanted to say, growing up in around sport and and sort of you know, bigger burly boys, and a lot of my mates inhale food. Like, just annihilate it, and you are up there with the best of them.

SPEAKER_01 3:52

I can't believe it! Like, where does it go? My mum always says to me, just take a breath in between mouthfuls, but I can't. I remember my nano when she used to eat, she used to every single mouthful, she'd go, and she'd take a breath in. I thought, how don't you choke on that? She's inhaling while she ate. She inhales, yeah, but really audible inhale, and I'm like, oh god, and it and I look at her when she's eating and it's all cold and I'm like twitching, I just can't bear it. But with you, I still got I still have a drink and I chill and I chat, but I think you feel like under pressure to eat quicker. But I just try, I do everything quick.

SPEAKER_03 4:23

And and the ordering. And the ordering, you're like you just order and then you tell them bring bring the entrees out with the banes. I definitely don't click at them. You don't click at them, but I'm just trying to, you know, you know.

SPEAKER_01 4:32

We went out to a place called Bay or Bay or something. Baya, Sandringham. Yeah. In Sandringham for one of our second dates, and and we ordered food, but it was like a meat and veggies, salad, and carbs. And I was like, Yeah, just bring it out all together because it was meat, carbs, and veg. It wasn't a starter.

SPEAKER_03 4:50

And then my my recollection it was a starter, but that's okay.

SPEAKER_01 4:54

The starter we got, we shared and we had it in the middle of the table, and we had oysters.

unknown 4:58

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 4:59

Your memory deceives you.

SPEAKER_03 5:03

So yeah, that was my P, but Sydney's chopped in on it as well.

SPEAKER_01 5:06

So I've got five to choose from.

SPEAKER_03 5:08

PMP. Alright, sweetheart, unload on me. Can you go soft on me?

SPEAKER_01 5:14

Right, right. One thing that you do, and I just look at you and I just think, ugh. Sure does. No, I don't die. I do. I saw you do it yesterday and I just was like, You said you don't have any iks with me. Well, I've un you've unlocked a new one, you dirty bugger. Are you ready for this? Dirty bugger. So you do this thing where you grab any piece of material, no matter what it is, where you are, and you fucking stick it in your ear to dry your ears and clean your ears out, and you stick it up your nostrils. So if it's a t-shirt that's a gorgeous shirt, you fucking hoike it up your nostrils and you really dig in like right into the corners of the end of your nose. It's absolutely repulsive. And I just look at you and go, P and P.

SPEAKER_03 6:06

That's another sensory thing. I can't, you've never said you've never brought that up with me before. And I didn't know that you noticed it at all.

SPEAKER_01 6:12

Noticed it. You do it everywhere we go.

SPEAKER_03 6:14

So it's a sensory thing. It plays in that category of sensory, like, I can't have wet things. You know, you know, you know, with your hands.

SPEAKER_01 6:21

Can you not use a tea to like go and get a kitchen roll? Sometimes you're just not blessed with kitchen roll. We're everywhere. You did it.

SPEAKER_03 6:28

There's kitchen roll everywhere.

SPEAKER_01 6:29

We you yesterday we were on a lounger and we were lying on towels, and you got your shirt, and you were like, and I thought, and then you look at it to see if there's anything like on it.

SPEAKER_02 6:40

I think I remember doing that yesterday and I remember going, Mrs. Grotty. I don't think she saw it. I thought we were reading the Kindle. And then I and then I scoped the area. So I stopped. I knew there was the three girls who just arrived at this resort, now we're getting their welcome drinks. I was like putting them off. No, no, no. I made sure they didn't see. I'm like, I'm all clear.

SPEAKER_03 7:03

Like between the the nooks, the little the little at the end of your nose. I just can't deal with that being wet. Can't deal with that being wet and inside my ears, I can't deal with them being wet.

SPEAKER_01 7:13

You know it's not very co it's very uncouth to use your shit. I know that. Your items of clothing.

SPEAKER_03 7:20

I've never said I was perfect. I've always said I'm trying to be.

SPEAKER_01 7:23

Anyway, we're in a very nice environment today, aren't we?

SPEAKER_03 7:26

We are.

SPEAKER_01 7:27

You probably can't hear the ocean in the background. Well, I hope not.

SPEAKER_03 7:30

It might be might be a little bit interruptive, but.

SPEAKER_01 7:32

Maybe for those who are um watching us at the end, we can just show them a little bit of where we are.

SPEAKER_03 7:38

Slick the cameras around and give them a look. POV POV.

SPEAKER_01 7:42

So we've obviously I can't believe we're coming to the end of our hollow bobs.

SPEAKER_03 7:46

Well, are we a little bit happy about that or a little bit ready for home, aren't we?

SPEAKER_01 7:50

Yeah, we're we're in two minds, aren't we?

SPEAKER_03 7:52

We're keen to go to the pullman after this, and the current hotel we're in is absolutely amazing.

SPEAKER_01 7:58

It's just it's so nice to be from we've gone from the hustle and bustle of a Luatu that's really busy, not quite as busy as Shango, but still very busy, to then coming here, which is literally you get to read like I've read two books in the last week.

SPEAKER_03 8:11

It's chalk and cheese from where we've been to here. Zero people here on this island.

SPEAKER_01 8:15

Oh, and you've gone out surfing on the boat, which is what we were talking about last week that you were desperate to do.

SPEAKER_03 8:20

Desperato.

SPEAKER_01 8:21

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 8:22

Yeah, do you know what? Yeah, so we it was a bit of a bucket list for me, is taking a boat out to do deep deep seas. Not really deep sea, but it's offshore surfing where the wave breaks a little bit off the beach, but yeah, the only way to get there is by boat. This boat was rustic, looked look felt like it was gonna sink at any time. Like you just got over there, and uh Pac, Pac-Man, took us out surfing, and and and and you did some filming for me, got some footage of me, and it was unreal. Yeah. Caught a couple of the the the best ways, and I felt like they were like gigantic. But they obviously weren't that big. But it was brilliantly. You were like, It was so fun. So, so fun. You loved it. How stoke, how stoke were all my five levels when I got it? I could see when I was like come back to the boat and and your face looking at me going, geez, he looks like he's had fun.

SPEAKER_01 9:09

Yeah, it was nice, it was really nice. And then we tried to go out last night when it was sunset for the waves, but they weren't as good, were they, which was a shame.

SPEAKER_03 9:15

Yeah, they were that excited. We tried to go again in the afternoon, um, but they weren't weren't.

SPEAKER_01 9:20

And now you're not good. Takes it out you.

SPEAKER_03 9:22

Yeah, surfing's a different different fitness, paddling. And I mean and and and I've had instructors both times when I was at Padang, I had an instructor, like a guy just coming out to help me get in this in the spot, and then same again here, and the same and and it's the same feedback. I'm you're a shit paddler. Like I'm I'm shocking at paddling, so it doesn't matter how much how much gym you do, how much running you do, paddling, surfing is just a completely different hard. It's what puts me off going out. They laugh at me, they laugh at me that I'm so such a shit paddler.

SPEAKER_01 9:49

I feel like I'm I'm a bit missing our routine and being at home and I really miss Cooper, the dog.

SPEAKER_03 9:54

But we'll see him very soon, we will.

SPEAKER_01 9:57

Also, I've I have loved being out here. It has been really it has been really lovely. Like we're just very, very blessed to be able to come and do stuff like this, aren't we? Yeah. We've had a bit of an issue though, because our visas. We tried to extend our visa, they said they needed to meet us at immigration because now when you're extending your holiday visa, you have to go and meet them, which is only new from May this year, so pretty recent. And we now are gonna be overstaying our I don't know what we're gonna do there. God, we're gonna get charged a million a day.

SPEAKER_03 10:26

Sydney had this whole visa issued last time where you got charged like three two grand or something. Yes, three grand, so it's uh it's a hundred dollars for every day. Is that what the what the fine is?

SPEAKER_01 10:37

Yeah, I overstayed for 22 days.

SPEAKER_03 10:39

Overstayed for 22 days. So that so your original visa is only is a maximum of 30 days, is that right?

SPEAKER_01 10:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 10:44

Yeah. So we're here for 33 days or 34 days or something. So but we're on an island, so now they're telling us we need to go to some immigration office and there's none around, so probably just a couple of fine. But we are in uh our uh resort at this hotel, but we're in here for three nights. In it, what do you reckon about it?

SPEAKER_01 10:59

Yeah, sick. I mean the place is lovely, isn't it?

SPEAKER_03 11:02

How different is it? We got like I think you can see from the cameras if you're watching the listeners, it's got a sand floor, like the whole living area is sand.

SPEAKER_01 11:09

Yeah, in the kitchen.

SPEAKER_03 11:10

It's so rogue, it's so different, it's giving lots of Tulum.

SPEAKER_01 11:14

He's obsessed with saying Tulum and I'm now leaves.

SPEAKER_03 11:16

So it gives that.

SPEAKER_01 11:18

And I was like, you've never been to Tulum, so you don't know what Tulum is like for a start. And he's like, Oh, it's giving toulum, it's giving Greek Greek islands, and I'm like, Well, they're different places, honestly. But no, this is not a functioning kitchen. Like it's architecturally incredible. Yeah. It's not a functioning kitchen. Yeah, but it is beautiful to wake up on a morning with the sound of the waves and looking out to the ocean. It's gonna rain this afternoon, but I don't know if it will or not.

SPEAKER_03 11:41

I don't know if it will, but the whole the where it's all positioned is yeah, it's it's an arch architect's dream resort. Like everything is built very lots of concrete, lots of sand, raw materials.

SPEAKER_01 11:50

It's unreal, but and um before we came out here, we did you went to golf, didn't you? And I decided to go and take myself off to a little hotel for the night. Oh y yes. Yes.

SPEAKER_03 12:00

Tell me about that, because I think it's a bit in that relationship stuff, like you know.

SPEAKER_01 12:07

Well, I think pe when I said I was going for a solo night, people are like, Oh, what's happened? Why are you having a solo night? And I was like, Well, he wants to go to golf really early in the morning. I want to just have a night away so I can read my book, do nothing. And I feel like it's really important. Like, we we we live together, we do stuff all the time, but we've been away for a long period of time, constantly spending lots of time together.

SPEAKER_03 12:26

24-7, like every minute.

SPEAKER_01 12:29

Yeah, and and I think we you saw something and I you sent it to me, and I see this stuff all the day, and it's like all the time, and it's like, oh, you've got to fill your own cup to be able to show up in your relationship. And I think that you love going to golf. Yeah, I love journaling and reading a book and getting in the bath and wearing a face mask. Yeah, and we can do that together, but when you're in a hotel room, it's a lot.

SPEAKER_03 12:51

Someone has to do the other person's thing or come together and do the same thing. Which ours was like watching TV series and and chatting a lot, which really you're like because after dinner you've only got that two hours where you need to go to sleep because we're gonna have a you know a good sleep routine or whatever. So, what do you do in that two hours? Well, you and I just end up binge we're just watching, you know, TV series or whatever, when really really you want to read. I love reading. But because we're in hotels and we're so close, yeah, not in our own environment where we've got a separate living room back at home, yeah. You know, and you can peel off and do your own thing and I can do my own thing, and then we come together to sleep, sleepy times, but like you don't have we're stuck together, so that's yes, filling your own cup, because that's what fills your cup, but I've you know, you need you just need to do that.

SPEAKER_01 13:31

And also when we're at home, there are some times where we'll we eat dinner together every night, but I'll you'll go, I really want to watch the golf, and I'll go great, get in, I'm gonna go and have a bath. But because when you're in a hotel room, it's like very constricted. Is that restrictive? Restrictive, yeah, and and it's not there was nothing wrong. We I didn't have any, we haven't we weren't having arguments, but it's just it's just really lovely to be able to just do something that you want to do. And something that I found is um with relationships is is like I feel uh in previous relationships I've always wanted to be like oh it it means that you love them more if you spend all of your time together, but I actually don't think that. I think that it's important to have your little breaks away and do your own little thing to be able to come back and then talk about it and enjoy each other's company, you know?

SPEAKER_03 14:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 14:16

So you don't take it for granted.

SPEAKER_03 14:18

Yeah, that moment when you can't you said to me, I had a fleeting moment, I'm like, why does she wanna when you said you wanted to go have a have a night at a different hotel, you know, so you could go do all these things, and I went, and just for a fleeting moment I went, Oh no, she doesn't like me, she's sick of me. But it was like that was obviously for a but it was but it was funny how we both both went, Yeah, this is a great idea, but no, no one worried or whatever. Well with no one there was nothing to worry about, it was just for the sole purpose of filling your own cup.

SPEAKER_01 14:47

But how also also how lush was it? Because then it was it was a bargain. We got this gorgeous hotel for 170 bucks, it was like 80 pounds a night, and then they had Friday, Saturday free, and and it was only our room that was free on the Saturday. So I stayed the Friday, and then you came and stayed with me the Saturday. And it's like a little mini holiday because the other place we were still a break. Yeah, it wasn't a hotel, it was kind of like a an apartment block, wasn't it? So and it was so it was nice to just have some chill time, and I feel really lucky that we're able to do that.

SPEAKER_03 15:16

I just want to sorry, can I just say a quick shout out to my um my little brother and uh his wife, Holly, I'll start. We've got a new member, family member. A little baby boy was born. Little Mac, well not little, but yeah, uh you to tell me about this, but Mac Richard Hinckley is born, everyone.

SPEAKER_01 15:35

Big Mac.

SPEAKER_03 15:36

Big Mac. Any so big Mac. Yeah, it took because is that big? What nine what was he, a big nine pounder?

SPEAKER_01 15:42

He was four point five kilograms. It reeled in it, yeah. So I don't know what that is in pounds, but yeah, nine nine pound, four point five four he was, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 15:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:52

Muckle. I was like, go on. And then they put a picture, they put a video up of Holly leaving the hospital. I said, she looks like she's been on a fucking weekend break. She's just like cracking on.

SPEAKER_03 16:01

Yeah, she was like that with the first two. Yeah. But first kid, everyone was like, oh my god, Holly, nothing's happened. She's back here, boom. Next day, boom, mumming walking around in her farm kit, doing shit.

SPEAKER_01 16:11

I love it.

SPEAKER_03 16:11

She's a wonder woman, she is, she's incredible.

SPEAKER_01 16:14

I can't wait to meet him. Yeah, it'll be so lovely.

SPEAKER_03 16:16

Yeah, we keep to get back to the farm, aren't we? Absolutely. See all the farm. But that's great news in the family.

SPEAKER_01 16:22

Agreed. So, yeah, last week we talked a little bit about uh our childhoods and you know growing up and whatnot, and I guess we're on holiday at the moment, and something that I that I I very much remember when I was a kid was my mum was a single parent. Well, I know that bit, but she used to spend she used to spend all year round saving money for us to go on an elite holiday. Oh yeah. So every year we would go to a like a four, five star hotel, and we would have like ten, it was always ten days because two weeks was a bit too much and one week wasn't enough. Yeah. And we'd go away and we'd go to Egypt, we'd go scuba diving, go snorkeling, we'd go on trips. Yeah, Turkey. Yeah, yeah, we went to it. Yeah, you were obsessed toum. Yeah, actually.

SPEAKER_03 17:01

Yeah, but no, I know I've been obsessed obsessed. But I'm to for the listeners, you've been ever you've been every you've been everywhere, man.

SPEAKER_01 17:06

Oh no, I've just said Turkey and Tulum's in Mexico, but we did go to Mexico. Yeah. And we went everywhere, and it was just such a lovely, like, lovely memory. Oh I forget I forget where some places that we've gone, because you know, I was a kid, but it was just so nice. And I remember as a kid being on holiday, making friends with other people. Was just other kids was so much fun.

SPEAKER_03 17:25

It was the best pit.

SPEAKER_01 17:26

Oh, it was the best, and just swimming, and what am I like underwater?

SPEAKER_03 17:29

Oh my god, underwater. Sydney, when we're at this resort, they've got like some little things that they can give out, like you know, fun things, um snorkeling kits. Snorkeling kits and stand-up paddleboards and stuff. And when that when Sydney heard there was a there was goggles under like a proper good, like good goggles and snorkeling kit, she has not been out of the pool. You have spent 60% of your time since we've been here in the pool underwater. I know. We went out surfing, went out on this boat trip and went around. As soon as we got back, we barely, barely, me and the boys were unpacking the eski full of beers and taking the surfboards off. You were already up in the lobby, through the lobby, with your goggles, got your goggles in the pool, underwater, snorkel. I'm like, where are you? Well, I saw his little snorkel just going around like a little shark.

SPEAKER_01 18:12

Also, how hilarious is it in the swimming pool that I've got snorkel on?

SPEAKER_03 18:15

I know. And that's the place because you know there's no animals, is what she said. Oh, I know I I feel safe because there's no animals in this water.

SPEAKER_01 18:21

Do you know what? I used to always go scoop diving and snorkeling with my mum, and then I watched Jaws, and now we see everything on socials, and it absolutely terrifies me that I now am scared to go underwater in the sea. I mean I still do, but it's still a bit terrifying. And something I just find is, and if if anyone has ADHD, try this. But just honestly, putting your head underwater seems to completely switch off my brain, and it is the best. So I just put my goggles on, I get under, and I just pretend I'm a mermaid and I wish that when I'm reborn and die that I come back as a dolphin. You know?

SPEAKER_03 18:58

You're funny. Well, have you ever tried float tanks?

SPEAKER_01 19:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 19:02

What so you don't like it? Float tank, you're you're you're silent, like your ears are under the water, aren't they? See, this is I've heard very, very good things about 'em. Then I've heard that if it's just not for you, it really ain't for you.

SPEAKER_01 19:14

I've done a float tank, but one that's more like a ba uh uh um a bed, so you don't actually go under the water. The only thing that I find is I really want to be able to line my back in the pool, but I don't like the water going in my ears, so this is why I go and sit on the bottom of the pool instead. Right. Because I in the float tank it goes in your ears, and I hate the feeling of it being in my ears.

SPEAKER_03 19:32

Yeah, but uh yeah, same. No one likes that like when you're trying to float on your back, but can't you if you just wriggle it wriggle it all in and get it f you know, chock a block in your ears, all the water, then it's no and then then it feels okay after that. Is that it?

SPEAKER_01 19:43

No, I d I just don't like it now. Did you go on holidays when you were a kid?

SPEAKER_03 19:47

Um we f we just definitely didn't go to fucking Egypt and Turkey. Um we have been holidaying in the beautiful township of Warnerball at a caravan park for thirty odd years in the same cabin our our mum and dad take us to. We did do one we did do one really, really cool um trip to the Gold Coast, a really fancy hotel when we were super young. Oh really? Yeah, we we're not a really big holiday holidaying family. Um I just we come together a lot for like days of you know, water skiing on the lake at home on our boat and things like that, and weekends together and there's a lot of long weekends together that we do cool stuff. Um I've been yeah, but um we never no, never overseas. We have never left the country together as a family. What? No. Never never. You're joking.

SPEAKER_01 20:32

That's wild to me.

SPEAKER_03 20:33

Rare and very rarely interstate. Like I yeah. Christmas a couple of years ago was at our auntie's who lives in Queensland, like half the family went up there, half didn't even go. Like, you know, like we just don't it's not probably a big travelling family, just yeah. And I see when I go on holidays and I see families away and they're on top of something like that would be epic. That would be epic, yeah. Like, you know.

SPEAKER_01 20:52

I mean, I guess it's expensive for four kids. Expensive, yeah. Four kids to go abroad. It's fun to do it, but our parents just never did it. But also, you live four hours from in the nearest airport.

SPEAKER_03 21:01

Well, yeah, four hours out of our capital city, Melbourne. Yeah, which is where the family farm is.

SPEAKER_01 21:06

It's long, isn't it?

SPEAKER_03 21:07

It's long.

SPEAKER_01 21:08

So we talked a bit last week as well about dating disasters, and I've got honestly some absolute caukers. Do you think we should go on and read some of them out?

SPEAKER_03 21:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 21:16

Oh please, if anyone's got any dating disasters, dating dilemmas that you want us to give advice on, or just any funny stories, please send them to tnt at gmail.com. Yeah, I got some funny ones this week. So I'm gonna start off with one from Lauren, because I've got I've got a couple, but I'm gonna start off with one from Lauren, who is a lady uh a lady. It's yeah, she is a lady. She's someone I met actually in Bali last year when I was here. Wow. By one of my followers, and she came out. No way. Yes, and she's written in. Oh, good honour. So thank you. She said, Are you ready? I want you to listen to this because I know sometimes your brain can go off to listen to it. You're locked in today. I am locked and loaded. Men can't do two things at once. Absolutely not. So I was dating this guy for about three months, and honestly, it was going really Really well. He brought out a side of me that nobody else had. We had a great connection and things seemed to be moving in the right direction. Then, towards the end of those three months, he went off to Mykonos with the boys.

SPEAKER_02 22:12

Now Mikanos with the boys. It's gonna get saucy here.

SPEAKER_01 22:17

You've done that, you've done that. Um now before he left, I'd asked him the question, what are we? And his response was, I don't want to define it until I'm gonna I get back, just in case. Biggest red flag. Immediate alarm bells, red flags everywhere. So while he was off living his best life in Mykonos, I decided to book myself a trip, heading off to Dubai and got on my own adventure. When he came back, he reassured me that nothing had happened, and to be fair, he'd been messaging me loads while he was away. Every night he'd text me when he got home, every morning he'd message again. So I thought maybe I'd overth I've overthought it. A few days later, we went out for dinner. During the meal, he told me that he'd spent time with one of the performers on Abba Voyage. You know what Abba Voyage is? You know Abba.

SPEAKER_03 22:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 22:58

Well, they in London they do like a hologram called Abba Voyage, and it's like they're on stage and you can go and see all their music live. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, he'd met someone who was part of Abba Voyage on holiday, and she was doing she and Lauren loves Abba. So she was like, We had dinner, and now I'm a complete sucker for Abba Voyage. So jokingly I said to him, Well, if it's the last thing you ever do for me, can you take me to the Abba Voyage concert? So we had dinner on the Tuesday, by the Friday, we were at Abba. We were at Abba, and honestly, we had the best night. We drank, we danced, we sang along to every song. It was brilliant. I stayed at his afterwards, left the next morning, and then I never heard from him again. Gone, vanished, disappeared. So it turned out he took my comment literally, if it's the last thing you do for me. Incredibly literally. That really was the last thing he did for me. Dick. What? Isn't that horrible? Isn't that just a bit of miscommunication there? What? He's just taking a what? So now a month later, he did eventually pop back up. He messaged me saying he missed me, and we saw each other a couple more times, hooked up, but by then I'd taken control of my own life, booked a trip to Bali. I felt the ball was very much in my court now. He drove me to the airport on Boxing Day, kissed me goodbye, and I went off for three weeks of adventure. Now this is where the story takes a turn because whilst I was in Bali, after I'd cried over Abba Man, fallen in love with myself and realised I am the prize, I met the most wonderful man. I met him on Gilly Tea, which was my last destination. He's from the UK and we had an instant connection. Six months later, weekends spent together, trips up and down to Barnsley, and now our first holiday together. I have a boyfriend. And honestly, I couldn't be happier. So in a strange way, I'm grateful for the guy who ghosted me after ABBA Voyage because if he hadn't, I might never have ended up in Bali and I definitely would have met wouldn't have met this wonderful man I'm with now.

SPEAKER_03 24:51

Oh and you of course. That's a beautiful story in the end.

SPEAKER_01 24:54

Isn't it? Because they say, redire what do they say? Like if something doesn't go right, it's redirecting you to you know, rejection is redirection. And that's rejection is redirection.

SPEAKER_03 25:04

Yeah. One door closes and another another door rejection.

SPEAKER_01 25:07

100%. And I just when I was reading it, it made me think about when I like last year with the guy that I dated before you, and he was like the last guy I dated before you, and I didn't really date anyone for about seven months. I he I I got met this guy who I actually know from back home. Met him he was out in Bali at the same time as me. We kind of got on well. I thought we were just gonna be friends, got on well. I ended up going to Dubai, that was an absolute nightmare. And I realized going to Dubai with him. No, I flew to meet him, he lived there.

SPEAKER_03 25:37

Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_01 25:37

So I flew to meet him, 14-hour flight, got there, he'd not even planned a date the first day we got there. We didn't go out for dinner for a f for the first week. It was the most bizarre experience of my whole entire life. Then he got really aggy, and I was just like, this is. What's Aggie? Like angry. Yeah, and I was like, this is so weird. And I just took myself out off and then I flew to Singapore. Like I just left his house and spoke of things.

SPEAKER_03 25:58

A gigantic flop.

SPEAKER_01 25:59

Yeah, he was awful. And he sent me a list of 12 things that he didn't like about me when I left bullet points.

unknown 26:04

What?

SPEAKER_01 26:06

He sent me a bullet point. Have you got him still? No. Uh no, no, I don't.

SPEAKER_03 26:10

But one of them was we'll try and get him off for the next part.

SPEAKER_01 26:12

One of them was I would love to fucking see him. He he wanted to do like a 24-hour fast or something, and I was he's yeah, Hannah.

SPEAKER_03 26:20

You've gone over to see this dude in Dubai for a week, and one of his things. Two weeks, and one of the things he wanted to do was go out and do a 24-hour fast. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 26:28

No, no, no. No, this is like into the into this into the week. And he's like, I'm gonna do a 24-hour fast. I was like, Yes, sound, no worries. And then I was like, I'll do it with you. And I start and I was eating still, and he said, Well, I'm starting from now. And I said, Oh, will you wait for me because I'm still eating? And then we'll start together. One of his things on his list was like, um, wanted me to wait for her when I wanted to do my twenty wanted you wanted me to wait for you when I wanted to do my 24-hour fast fast, and I don't like that, it's controlling. So weird. Anyway, after that, I came away and I was like, This is where it stops, and I feel like it gets to a stage in life with people that you date. If you keep attracting the wrong man, you've got to look internally and go, what is it that I'm putting out there? What are the vibrations that I'm putting out there? And I started, I booked my two two months in Bali, and I started really obsessively journaling and writing down stuff like, I am a queen, I deserve respect from the next next person I am with. And then I started journaling, and I just really was just, I used to ask ChatGPT, what does a secure woman do? What does it look like to be a secure woman? What does it look like to be a cure woman? Yeah, and I was like, okay, and that's what I need to do because I am get I am getting all of these fucking either anxious attachments or avoidance, which was making me totally anxious and not normal. And then I understood what it was like to fill my own cup and love myself and do the things that I enjoyed. That's cool.

SPEAKER_03 27:50

That's really attractive. Yeah. For another male, that is the most attractive thing about a woman. Yeah. For men who seem to be always, you know, everyone has a goal at us, it it's just something that men have. We can more often than not control our emotions a bit better than a woman. Is that safe to say? Because you have a lot more going on with your hormones, a lot more, which that's just how it is. But then what frustrates a man is when a when if if a woman um sometimes can't see what's going on, try and do something, find a solution, and fill fill their own cup or whatever.

SPEAKER_01 28:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 28:20

Filling their own, yeah, and it's really important. But what it's so yeah, yeah, what I'm trying to say, it's just very attractive to see someone go, right, I'm gonna get a fucking pen and a bit of paper, and I'm gonna write this down and I'll work through it. Yeah. Very attractive.

SPEAKER_01 28:33

Yeah. Well, we were having a conversation with Juz and um and Pat, your friends who were out here in Bali, about it's funny because the advice that you give as a woman compared to the advice you give as a man is very different. And one thing that you said was like, Sometimes if you feel overwhelmed, you are actually quite good at going away and trying to sort it out yourself. You might have I might have blips where I'm like and then you're like looking at me, and then I sort myself out, and you're like, Well done. That was really attractive. It's really good that you've managed to do that because it's hard as a woman.

SPEAKER_03 29:06

Oh, I I can imagine. Sometimes it's hard as very hard as a man. Yeah, I get that.

SPEAKER_01 29:10

Anyway, thank you, Lauren. Thanks. Well done, so lovely. But I've do we have any more? Yeah, oh god, Lucy. Lucy, Lucy, Lucy.

SPEAKER_03 29:18

So we've got something from uh Lucy.

SPEAKER_01 29:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 29:20

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 29:21

I went back to England last year for six weeks or whatever it was. I went to High Club um or high gym in which we'll we'll be going to in Newcastle, which wasn't there when I last lived there. Anyway, this lady called Lucy, who is a PT, she is just phenomenal. She's hilarious. I love her, she is brilliant. She went, Oh my god, I follow you on Instagram. Anyway, we hit it off. She took loads of classes at the gym. Her classes are brutal. Anyway, she's really funny. She's just such a funny person. And she was like, I've got so many dating stories. Anyway, she sent one and you couldn't write this, honestly.

SPEAKER_03 29:57

So let's hear it.

SPEAKER_01 29:58

Hola! As requested, I have some date stories worth sharing, to be honest, because if we can all collectively have a giggle at them, it makes it all worth it. Story numero uno Swimmer boy. So, backstory. Myself and this guy will call him Kirk. What a shit name. Anyway, we'll call him Kirk. Knew each other from when we used to swim when we were younger. My mum also just so happened to be his coach. Little fun tit bit. Anyway, about seven years ago I had a saucy interaction with him whilst on a rebound, you know how it is. It was okay, scratched the itch, but nothing worth hanging around for. Anyway, Kirk has been sliding into my DM sporadically ever since. That encounter and popped up more recently asking if I wanted to go on a date, so I thought fuck it, I'll give the persistent king what he wants and said give me a time and a place. He lives in my hometown, so we agreed on somewhere halfway. However, side note, I unexpectedly needed to go home to see my family that weekend, but I could still make the date, and we decided to drive there together. It was about a 40 minute drive to the restaurant. The day comes and he picks me up. Nice car. Tells me within four seconds that it's his car. I was thinking, well, I would assume it is, but now you've said that, I'm not convinced. Anyway, later found out he works at a car dealership, can now confirm it's not his car. We're in the car chatting, and within ten minutes he asks me, So are you rich then? I was like, Huh? And he went, Are you rich? I said, Well yeah, rich in life. I've got amazing friends, love my job, and have lots to be grateful for, but I'm assuming that's not the context you're referring to. He said, No. You know what I mean. Are your parents rich? I was like, What a weird question to ask. No. He then continued to tell me how he thinks his nan is part of the mafia and keeps all her cash in her mattress. At this point I'm thinking What the what?

SPEAKER_00 31:55

At this point I'm thinking, get me out of this car now. However, I was locked in for a little bit of Thai grub, so I thought, I'll firm it.

SPEAKER_01 32:04

We arrive at the car park, he refuses to pay for parking, so we drive around trying to find Rowan side parking spot. Remember, this car is Spenny, top range German whip.

SPEAKER_00 32:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 32:14

We arrive at the restaurant, I'm thinking, get to the end of this day and then get out of there. The universe had other plans. The waitress comes over and asks if we want drinks and prawn crackers. Obviously, I said yes. Duh. He rolled his eyes, huffed, and commented how they were five quid. Then things got really fucking strange. The conversation turned into what I can only describe as an interrogation. He began questioning me about my job, my income, and my tax bracket. How much tax did you pay last year then? Wow. How much are you making? Well, I need to see a photo of this guy. I was gagged. More concerned that maybe he worked for the HMRC and I'd need to I'd need my accountant present. Like, sir, are you okay? Shouldn't be the one ask shouldn't I be the one asking you? Yeah. Freak. Meals arrived, food was good, but I couldn't think of much other than how bad I wanted to leave. Fast forward to the bill landing on the table, as you can imagine what happened next. So, how do you want to do this then? Since I drove us here. Oh no. I wanted to crawl into a small hole in the ground, but I thought, fuck it, I'll pay. Get this night over and done with and go home. Ha ha ha. He won he I he wanted to be reimbursed for the travel to get there.

SPEAKER_03 33:28

As in like her pay because he drove. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 33:31

Wow in a car that he stole from work. Yeah, wait for it. Bill paid, ready to bounce. It's probably a good time to add that it's mid-January. Light snow is forecast. We get outside, it's white. In fact, it has snowed. But not just a little bit, a lot of bit. Not only that, we're in the hills. Not if the roads were gritted. And do you remember that nice car? Yeah, it can't drive in the fucking snow because it's now been it's so low, it's so low. So I ended up staying in a hotel overnight because we couldn't get recovered, and then we spent five hours trying to get home in the snow the next morning, to end what can only be described as a date I would wish on my worst enemy he dropped me off at the bottom of my street, not even at my house, and said, I've really enjoyed spending time with you. We should do it again. My closing line was, yeah, that that's probably because you were the one getting wined and dined, so I'll pass thanks. Did she did? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 34:28

Good, Luce. Good. That was fucking weird the whole way through that story. What the? I need a photo of him. He's he's that if if she's What the hell? Did you even miss that? Like, you know, after being with him already, did he not show any weirdness or at this you know after their first little what I mean she was trying to push back to be fair at the start, remember? She was like, I'm not, nah, nah, nah, I'm done with this dude. And then just because he was so persistent, she let him back in, but hey, so that is bizarre.

SPEAKER_01 34:57

How what do you think about what do you think about him saying I drove us here so you can take the bill?

SPEAKER_03 35:03

He just sounds like an absolute fucking wanker. Dweeb. Yeah. He works at a car dealership and borrowed the car, like, and then lying the whole way through. And there's obviously.

SPEAKER_01 35:12

Who asks about your tax bracket?

SPEAKER_03 35:14

That's an absolute loser by the sounds of things. Yeah, no one, no one ever.

SPEAKER_01 35:17

It is absolutely bizarre. But poor her, what a dickhead. Can you be awesome? And also, I just feel like on a first date, a man should pay.

SPEAKER_03 35:29

Yeah, probably. Most that's what generally happens.

SPEAKER_01 35:32

I feel like a woman should definitely be like, I'll get a drink, I'll get a round, I'll get something. Like I I I do that. And I do think that it's nice to offer and it's fine to split, but that would immediately knock me if someone said split.

SPEAKER_03 35:46

It would make me think they I think it's I think it's just the gentlemanly thing to do. Yeah, agreed. That's why gentlemanly is is a is a such it's a term, because it's a real thing. It's just a gentlemanly thing to do. It's the probably yeah, sure, sugar it is the point. Probably searching for.

SPEAKER_01 36:01

But dating these days is absolutely wild, like apps and stuff. Because we'd every like one of my friends is like, oh I thought you guys met on an app. But what about what about back in the day? Dial up internet and a bit of MSN Messenger.

SPEAKER_03 36:13

MSN Messenger.

SPEAKER_01 36:14

Oh, what a fucking belt.

SPEAKER_03 36:16

It was simpler times. Jesus Christ, that is a shot of nostalgia back in the day. MSN, you used to come home from school, you'd fill in your afternoon outside doing whatever it was, and then night time, just before dinner, log in. That's your dial-up internet happening, and then boom, you're in. Then you're in MSN Messenger.

SPEAKER_01 36:38

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_03 36:38

And what was the tone?

SPEAKER_01 36:39

What was your handle? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 36:41

Do do do. What was your and you were texting your crushes? Sorry. And you text, and then when you a girl you had a crush on or whatever, sent you messages, oh, you feel with the How did that go?

SPEAKER_01 36:52

Did you have one computer in the hold of the house for a while?

SPEAKER_03 36:54

We had one hot one computer for all of us. So we had to take turns going in. It was in the home office. It was in the office. Yeah. So we would have to take turns and then you'd come in and fight your brothers, like, my tom, get out. No, and you'd half getting ripped away from the keyboard. I'm like, I'm churning her! I'm churning some girlfriends.

SPEAKER_01 37:10

I didn't have any of that because it was just me. But mine was on the landing, so my mum wanted it on the landing so she could walk up behind me and see what I was doing.

SPEAKER_03 37:17

Another funny as thing was, and this sort of like ties in with like how much of like how we're all a bit like uh we're dating these days is a bit bit cowardy. Like, you know, you can sit behind your app, you swipe, you say hello a couple of times, and then you just get out of it and talk to someone else. In the old school days when I was a youngster coming up, we used to ring the person that we liked from landline to landline. That was the only way to communicate. If you weren't on MSN, if you weren't on MSN, it was to ring. So we'd have these girls, not not lots of them, but every now and then we'd have a stadium. Call them ring ring the whole everyone in the house. Oh, the phone's ringing, someone answer it. Dad fucking mum answers it, yeah, hello. Oh yeah, it's buddy Stacy. She's like, oh Clayton. It's you. It's Stacy on the line for you. And then you'd go, yeah, no, we only had two landlines.

SPEAKER_01 38:06

Did you get the most calls? Can I just ask? Yeah, that's of course. Of course.

SPEAKER_03 38:10

Well, Dave was super young at that point, so it's just me and Jason. Jason and I. Correct, correct English. And we only had two landlines, two phones in the whole house. One was on the bedside table of mum's mum and dad's main bedroom, and one was in the office. So when everyone rang we're all in the living area, the phone was always answered in the office. But if it was an important call or you wanted to take it private, you had to go up in mum and dad's bedroom.

SPEAKER_02 38:31

So here I am going up to talk to this girl, perched up on mum and dad's bed, got all these fluffy pillows. You know, your parents' bed's always a bit more pallisy.

SPEAKER_03 38:39

He's got the pillows, so I've got the pillows around me. I just have to communicate with mum up the other end of the house. And she's like, Mum, I've got it now.

SPEAKER_02 38:46

Well, my other girl's sitting there, like this little girl, this little 12-year-old, just want to chat to a boy. We don't know what we're doing. We just know what you know, you don't want to you don't know what you're doing. Yum listening. You don't, but then the mum goes, okay, have fun, kids. Then you're like, then then you've got your privacy, and then you just talk shit.

SPEAKER_01 39:01

See, my mum definitely used to listen to mine. I remember my friend's home. So that happened to you as well, like people call the house the the the landline. Yes, and I was only allowed to call people after six o'clock because it was free to ring another landline. So my best friend was 019-12131542. That was her home number. And I used to ring her every night. We'd sit on the phone for hours, and yeah, I just loved it. But like You look back on it fondly? I would lift the phone up and listen to some of my mum's comic pose. Yeah. Loved it. Would ya? Yeah, I loved it.

SPEAKER_02 39:30

So you did have two phones as well. Yeah, we had two phones. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 39:33

But ours weren't connected, ours were um handheld, yeah, lift off.

SPEAKER_03 39:37

You were in the new age, you're slightly younger than me. Ours are all corded.

SPEAKER_01 39:40

And then it's mental because no one has house phones now. Isn't that why? Where have they all gone?

SPEAKER_03 39:46

Yeah, well that's yeah, it when when did it actually phase out? I don't know when landlines weren't a thing anymore. Well, your dad still got one?

unknown 39:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 39:53

But it's just sales.

SPEAKER_01 39:54

I mean, yeah, we're still shit that comes from.

SPEAKER_03 39:56

Well never Daniel. Now that my brother has moved into that house, that house, they're like, we don't need a landline anymore, so let's cut the line. We've got our mobiles, as you just got your mobiles. So that was it's a it's a weird.

SPEAKER_01 40:07

Do you know what I also my MSN was called Sydney Girls Rule.

SPEAKER_03 40:14

You have been a little shit.

SPEAKER_01 40:16

And we used to have Bebo, and you could send three hearts a week, I think it was.

SPEAKER_03 40:20

Bebo.

SPEAKER_01 40:20

Bebo was epic. It was like um a MySpace or like a Oh MySpace. Yeah, but it was called Bebo, and you could put comments and stuff, and you could send loves like hearts to the guys that you liked. Yeah. And then you'd be waiting to see if they sent you one back.

SPEAKER_03 40:33

Oh, the small things.

SPEAKER_01 40:35

Yeah, I know. Just epic, absolutely epic. Um anyway, we've got the last couple of days, my darling, here. We do, my darling. Pullman tomorrow for the weekend. Then we get back, I've got a week and then I'm going to get the titties done, aren't I?

SPEAKER_03 40:50

It's gonna be fucking freeze when we get back to Melbourne. But yeah, we've got we're looking forward to the big Big job.

SPEAKER_01 40:56

Big badong badongs. Big badong badong, flickety-wickity. Katie Price coming up. Katie Price, you love her. No, I'm getting the boobs done. I'm getting s I'm getting fat sucked out of my thighs and put into my boobs.

SPEAKER_03 41:09

That's not your thigh.

SPEAKER_01 41:10

No, I know, but also there's like these little I've got these little like fat pockets in my armpit between like my breast tissue and my arm, and he's gonna suck those out as well and put them in. And everyone's like, why are you getting your boobs done before you have a baby? And I'm like, if we get married, or when we get married, I want to have nice titties. Yeah. And I'll probably get them done again anyway. And I feel like I like a breast that looks not fake. I like a breast that hangs. They're called a not Slovakian breast. Slovakian breast. It's called a it's called like a oh god, it my uh surgery. Scandinavian breast. Scandinavian. So it kind of like they like hang rather than stuck on. So I'm looking forward to that. And I just thought, well, I'm probably not gonna have a kid, are we, for another couple of years at least. They said to give it a year to settle.

SPEAKER_03 41:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 41:57

So I was like, perfect. Bang it. Get in, get it in. So we're getting that done.

SPEAKER_03 42:02

You do you, honey. You do you.

SPEAKER_01 42:04

And I thought, well, I have to get them done again eventually, don't I? Realistically, and I quite I thought when I breastfeed, then afterwards they'll just have a nice little hang to them. Fingers crossed, you know. Let's get this. Let's get them. I'm not actually that bothered about my boobs, it's just I quite like to have bigger boobs, that's all slightly bigger. Bothered enough to go in and have a surgery. Yeah, because my shoulders are quite wide. Like I went for a bra fitting and they were like, yeah, you do have quite a broad chest.

SPEAKER_03 42:30

It's a bit of a swimmer's shoulders, don't you? Oh, I was good at swimming.

SPEAKER_01 42:34

Yeah, it was great. Makes sense. Makes sense.

SPEAKER_03 42:36

Alright, hun.

SPEAKER_01 42:36

Alright, hun, lots of love. Lots of love. Should we do our Indonesian handshake?

SPEAKER_03 42:40

Love you, Indonesian handshake.

SPEAKER_01 42:41

See you later.

SPEAKER_03 42:42

Where does everyone where does everyone see our pod and listen to Hey, it's Ep 10?

SPEAKER_01 42:45

We're on Ep 10. Congratulations. Congratulations. Who would have thought? Was it as bad as you thought this one? Because you really weren't looking forward to it.

SPEAKER_03 42:51

He keeps saying we need to do one every other week. I woke up a bit sniffly and I was just a little bit under a bit under I don't know how you catch a cold in friggin' Indonesian weather.

SPEAKER_01 43:00

He had half a blocked nostril and it had a little bit of a sore scratchy throat from the AC, and he's like, That I need some cold and flu tablets. Have you got any? Have you got any nasal spray? And I was like, calm down.

SPEAKER_03 43:10

There's nothing wrong with you.t at gmail.com.

SPEAKER_01 43:17

If I've missed any of my DMs, I really apologise, but thank you for listening.

SPEAKER_03 43:21

Thanks, Lewis, and thanks. Lauren and Lucy. Lauren and Lucy, thank you, guys. No more must love.

SPEAKER_01 43:25

Thanks, Lauren.

SPEAKER_03 43:26

Terra McCassy.

SPEAKER_01 43:27

Terra McCassy.

SPEAKER_03 43:27

Summer summer.

SPEAKER_01 43:28

Summer summer.