Kisses from Kenya Episode 13: When They Go Low Do We REALLY Go High?

EPISODE 13: When They Go Low, Do We REALLY Go High?

Michelle Obama gave us the mantra. But in 2026, Brendan and Vuyanzi are asking the harder question: is going high actually costing us something? As the late Flint City Council Member Eric Mays put it rather memorably - when they go low, we go lower. Is he onto something?

In this episode:

• Whose America Is It Anyway? - the queer community's reaction to a "they/them" joke in the Scary Movie 6 trailer: is this the right hill to die on? Plus Deon Cole, Nicki Minaj, and the kind of threats that tell you everything about the moment we're in
• Deep Dive - an ICE agent throws a woman to the ground in Vermont; Florida passes a sweeping anti-LGBTQ bill; where exactly is the high road and who does it serve?
• Queer & Black Joy - Brendan does tarot reading at a Queer Artists Flea Market; Vuyanzi has a moment with her sister about Camp Glen Spay

Democrats Abroad Kenya | LGBTQ rights Florida | ICE immigration 2026 | Black diaspora podcast | Queer expat Africa | American abroad Nairobi | U.S. politics from Kenya | Michelle Obama when they go low

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Transcript

Vuyanzi 0:06

Hey, Kisses from Kenya is produced by Democrats Abroad Kenya, but everything you hear in this podcast reflects our personal perspectives. As Americans living in Kenya.

Brendan 0:20

Yes. Nothing we say should be taken as the official stance of Democrats Abroad Kenya, Democrats Abroad Global, or the Democratic Party. And this is an entertainment space and not an official policy platform.

Vuyanzi 0:33

Thank you. Welcome to Kisses from Kenya. I am Boyonzi. I'm Brendan. Okay, so today I'm thinking about Michelle Obama, our forever first lady, by the way. Her um the phrase that she said in the 2016 Democratic Convention. And she said, when they go low, we go high. And I remember arousing, like, woo, woo, woo. But really, do we have to go high? Because the other side of it, I think about the late Eric Mays, who was a Flint, Michigan councilman. And you can find him all over Instagram and Facebook. He's he was hysterical. And he's like, when they go low, I go lower. And the thing is, that's where I feel I'm at with the world. I don't know. Your thoughts?

Brendan 1:35

I mean, Cardi B said with a little bit, I take it to hell.

Vuyanzi 1:38

So she went even, you can't get much lower than hell.

Brendan 1:46

I mean, I think like there's always like a time and place for like pick your battles, right? Because I think that's like a practical consideration sometimes. But like pick your battles don't mean that I gotta let you talk crazy to me.

Vuyanzi 2:00

Oh gosh. And you're not about to come at me though. I know full of shit. You know, and and the thing is though, the way like it's it's like the way, let's say, whether it's I've been raised or I don't even know that I've been raised like that, but a way that I've tried to adopt in my life is like if if you want to come out your mouth crazy, that well, I am a lover, not a fighter. And I just, you know, I will try to just put you at bay. But right now I'm not feeling that. Like I want to punch people in their face. I want to hurt people. That's how I feel.

Brendan 2:45

Allegedly. Allegedly, you are okay.

Vuyanzi 2:50

So, no, no, I do. Oh, oh, we're supposed to say, yes, allegedly. So, so let's take a deeper dive into this because also it leads me into um just a little bit of pop culture, too, right? Um, and this is around whose America is it anyway? And it's like you there's hate speech, there's things that aren't hate speech, there's hate speech that I don't care about, but I care more about what gets done as a result of it when people say something that's um what do you call that when you say something and it's kind of like triggering to other people and you know it will be, and you know, some not unstable. No, it's it's like a flagging, dog flagging, flagging, dog whistle, yes, I'm like it's a dog wailing. No, it's uh it's it's the dog whistle things, right? That then get unstable people to maybe carry out acts. So it's like, well, whose America is it anyway? And recently, um Dion Cole, who I absolutely love, an American comedian. Oh, oh well, he is okay, he's great, good looking, and he likes older women. He calls them vintage. Yeah, hi Dion. I can put away guards. Yeah.

Brendan 4:20

But Tarot Tobar is middle-aged of me.

Vuyanzi 4:22

So oh god, that whole thing. Oh, and by the way, because I'm hearing these not together, I am wearing Mardi Ga Mardi Gras beads again for this episode. I love them. Thank you, Brenda, for bringing them to me. So, um, anyway, he opened up for um then NAACP awards. And he did this last year too. Or was it the year before? Anyway, there was one year where he kind of prays. He does a mock prayer. It's not a real prayer, and he mentions he mentions Nicki Minaj. I I'm not gonna go into if you don't understand who that is and what it is she's done and how we've gotten here, then you need to Google that. I'm not gonna give all that history, but she's maybe not in the best eye in terms of she coked out. Is she coked out? That's what they say on every day. Oh, exactly. Oh god.

Brendan 5:18

Well, well, it's come from me at the mind. When they go low, I take it to hell.

Vuyanzi 5:26

No, allegedly, allegedly. Um, so he says this prayer, and then he says what she learned her ass is whatever she's got implanted in her behind that is messing with her mind, and he said, We bind that ass bear or whatever it is. It was hysterical. You you gotta look this up. It's so funny. And then, well, I think it was funny. Yeah, however, when we talk about people, I mean, I know you can say what you want to say, but I just I actually had to pull this up because of what people said to him as a result. Now, I don't know what they call Nicki menages people. You know how for Beyonce Barbs, oh, that's oh, those okay. This is where I my middle-agedness really comes out. All right, someone said, Oh, God, like, so I'm gonna read these and they're absolutely horrible. And I want to be clear, this is a disclaimer, another one besides the one at the top of the show. You may see me like laugh, but I'm not laughing at it. It's just that people really say this. So someone posted a picture of him and his mother and said, Go dig your mama up. This is all because he said something about Nicki Minaj's ass and her mind. It says, That's why your fat, no, I don't even know if I should read the ones about his mother, but they kept going. That's why your fat ass black mom built a mom daddy. Black MM built. Black and built ass mom. Mm-hmm mom. That oh god, bitch, bitch, God was giving her grace because she should have died when she was giving birth to you out of her static ass, dry ass raccoon pussy, bitch. Who writes that?

Brendan 7:19

I mean, they have a reputation for being out of my own.

Vuyanzi 7:23

Well, no, okay. No, this one, this one is scary. It says, you better get security lol you two improv shows, Charlie Kirk soon. And they, well, they spell Charlie. Oh no, they did spell it right. But what the someone's threatening to kill him over his joke about Nicki Minaj. Um, and I don't like reading the ones about his mother. Um, and then they said he kissed, you're practically sucking Jay-Z dick to get a picture. I don't even know when they're referring to keep Nikki out your mouth before I spit on you. So, like, even in pop culture, now, yeah, people have gotten canceled before. However, this death threats, they're talking about his deceased mother. Like, that to me is crazy. Who's America is it anyway? I don't effing know. Because that shit was, sorry, but that's all I can say. That shit was crazy. So I don't know what you got, what you got for Who's America Is It Anyway? Or what is your what are your thoughts about it? Because that's I don't know.

Brendan 8:33

Well, I mean, um, I think it's like because we'll we'll talk about anti-LGBT stuff when we get to the main discussion, but I think like to me, there's this like when we're talking about picking your battles, right? Like, I don't know if you've seen all the controversy around the trailer for scary movie six.

Vuyanzi 8:53

I've seen controversy, but I haven't seen the trailer.

Brendan 8:56

There's like a there's like one where it's like they're about to kill the girl, they're like, you know, it's like, oh, like I'm a like it was something about like I'm gonna stab her or something, and then she's like, my pronouns are they and they're so I did see that. I thought it was hysterical. Some people from my community are like real upset about that, right? And I feel like it's one of those where I mean same thing like with this this Nicki Minaj thing, right? It's like number one, like there is space for humor to be edgy, like it's supposed to be edgy, like it's actually part of like how we deal with shit, is like being edgy, and also it's like you know, like if like the same, like well, three-quarters of the people that are going after him about Nicki Menager and the LGBTQ community. That girl has been transphobic, she's been homophobic, she's done all the things, even very recently out here like fighting for her. Wow, which to me is crazy. Wow, but then it's like you want to fight, like I mean, like the Wayans brothers in general, like have been like fairly supportive, and then it's Marlon Wayans, right? Who has like a I think a child who is trans or something and has been like very vocal. Like, so it's like you're going after an ally because of like a joke that like you feel like it's off color, but it's like the stuff that we're gonna talk about in the main discussion. It's like we have bigger fish to fry than like a they and joke in scary movie, which like literally like think about all the jokes that we've had in scary, like in scary movie, like all the ones that you remember.

Vuyanzi 10:29

Let me tell you something scary. Off the chain. Do you remember Mr. Man? I don't remember when he stood off and no coach mayor. Oh, Coach Mare.

Brendan 10:41

Oh I I I just will say when that thing fell down, everyone in the theater was like, oh yes, but it it's like I I just feel like I don't know, like it's like we're so it's like how like you have like you do have to pick your battles in the sense of like I don't know, like like like like that to me is not an example of like when we when they go low, we go high, because it's like it's a joke in a movie. Like that's literally like the whole premise is to be edgy.

Vuyanzi 11:16

You know, just now when I did my heavy blank up, my eye almost got shut.

Brendan 11:21

I blew her eyes shut.

Vuyanzi 11:25

I I put mascara on the top and the bottom, and just now I was trying to listen into Brendan and do an extra long. And and my eye, my mascara eyes almost stayed shut.

Brendan 11:36

She has a pink eye on. Um so anyway, um we are gonna talk about this when they go low, we go high a little bit more. Okay.

Vuyanzi 11:50

You had an article that you wanted to Well, um, well, that was my Oh you didn't want to talk about this other thing? Yeah, no, I'll go into that, but technically my pop culture was kind of like my article. Yeah. But I let's talk about do when uh do we really go high when they go low? Like what's the almost I really want to ask what's the benefit of going high when they go low? Because I'm really not seeing it, I'm not feeling it. Um what what I thought about this theme, and the first picture that came up for me, and it's how recent I did it, was again, I was on Instagram and someone posted what is supposed to be Vermont. There's no reason for me not to believe it's Vermont, but anyway, they're like, this is still going on. And what was the this the ice, like, but they were more so on it than it looked like even more so than Minnesota because people were gathered around a hot house with ice agents. I see one ice guy, people, of course, standing in front, they're taking whatever those canisters are, boom, like right there. People are, yeah, and just like people are like while people are right there. And then what really did it for me, and I said, is there really a benefit to going high? Is one lady, just one wherever they were filming, right there. One lady's like, yes, she's protesting in front. And the way the the cop or ice agent, I don't even know which one it was, the way he grabbed her and threw her down like she was nothing. Like she like body slammed her, like nothing. And am I, what does going high look like when they are body slamming women? And we, of course, we know women have been killed more, you know, but but it was something so visceral about that and this woman getting slammed to the ground. I don't see the benefits, and and I want to be clear about this because normally I don't think of myself as a violent person, right? However, I'm like, this is how I think right now. Does shit need to get burned to the ground and just get rebuilt? Because, like, to reform a thing, I think we're beyond. Like, does like what needs to happen or what needs to be destroyed and rebuilt completely from scratch? And that may not sound very coachy, because I'm a coach by trade. It may not sound very coachy and happy and cheerleader, but that's how I'm feeling. And when you get me feeling this way, you know, shit is bad. Yeah. Yeah.

Brendan 14:38

I mean, well, no, I mean it, I think it's the it was the same thing for what I was thinking about when I was reading this article about Florida, where they're like passing this like crazy new I mean, they've like switched tactics so many times, and so now it's all about like, oh, you know, it's like supposed to be like about protection and like it like it.

Vuyanzi 14:59

What is it? Can you explain a little bit about it?

Brendan 15:01

Like extremely like broadly, but like what it comes down to is like it could be used to basically like similar to some of the stuff we're seeing on this continent, like you know, if you're like even advocating for like LGBT issues, like there could be punishment associated with that. Like there's like like they're trying to really just kind of hit it from all angles.

Vuyanzi 15:25

And that's in Florida.

Brendan 15:26

Yeah.

Vuyanzi 15:27

Wow.

Brendan 15:29

And like I guess like the guy who sponsored it, he was like, you know, like there was a quote from him in the article. It was like, you know, I'm the one that like like Florida is where D E I goes to D-I-E. And like that was allegedly like the impetus of this like bill.

Vuyanzi 15:48

Wow, and and he's proud to say that.

Brendan 15:50

Yeah, or there was like a whole um, I don't know, have you been watching these art or these videos of like them deposing these like doge, like these 22-year-olds that were like working at Doge and like deleting all the like grants?

Vuyanzi 16:04

Yeah, well, yeah, because someone said, Well, what is DEI?

Brendan 16:07

Well, like the one I was watching today, like he was like, Well, why like why why did you call this like one of the craziest ones that needed to go? And he's like, Because right there in it, like they talk about LGBTQ. And so it's like, even for you talking about like identity now, all of a sudden, like and it's like, I mean, yeah, like I think there is like a there is kind of like a sense of it's like, how do I go high with someone like that?

Vuyanzi 16:34

You can't. How do we take them to hell though? Mm-hmm. So you know, I I would like to, I wish we could call in our Forever First Lady and say, yo, like, where are we now with this? Do you still stand by that? And that was 10 years ago, imagine. And what wow, 10 years ago. So do you still stand by that? As they still try to, you know, all that comes to my mind is like F-word, F-word, H words, S word. I'm trying to minimize the curses so we don't get, you know, a certain reading or something on YouTube. No, there might be. They're picking up our algorithms, they're listening.

Brendan 17:19

There's way more stuff that we've talked about on here, but you time, especially talking about that fat fucker.

Vuyanzi 17:28

So it's like, what the fuck? It's happening. No, with all of this. And so, and okay, and maybe this is now where we say it'll be so important to make sure that you vote for midterm elections. One of the lowest, you know, when you look at who votes in midterms, the lowest, lowest turnout in a non-presidential. But now, listen, and I've heard this so many times before, like, now it's more crucial than ever. No, no, no. Fuck that shit. Now, today.

Brendan 18:00

Well, it at some point it's just like, how many times do I have to tell you? I mean, it's the sounds like my grandmother, which would beat the shit out. I've been reading all this because you know it's primary seas right now. Yeah, everyone's like sniping at each other, you know. Of course, there's like the the race in Texas that, like, you know, Jasmine Crockett, like, very sad, you know, the outcome. But then it's like, I'm like reading people, like everyone is being so divisive. Like, um, and it's like, oh well, like I guess I won't be voting. And I'm like, how is that your takeaway? Like, you're looking around us. I guess I won't vote. We're all in the same reality, to my understanding. Like, like, none of us are in the matrix. Yo, seriously. So it's like you have experienced the last like year and year. I mean, it feels like it's been four years, but it's been one year. So you have experienced the last one year, and like it's it's one of these where it's just like I mean, it feels like like now it's like like the flip side of like when I was having conversations with people, like when Kamala was running, and it was like, well, I can't vote for her. And I was like, I feel exactly the same way you do about Palestine, but like the other option is not better for your issue. Yo, it's for it's you know, and so it's like if your issue is about women's rights, if your issue is about like rights for black communities, like show me how you having a Republican in the Senate is gonna make things better for any of the communities that you care about.

Vuyanzi 19:38

And now we see. And those people, I'm sure a lot of them are regretting that they did not.

Brendan 19:44

Well, but what I'm saying is like the things that I see people talking about online makes me think that they don't.

Vuyanzi 19:49

Oh, okay.

Brendan 19:50

Like I watch people be like, oh, but like, you know, the other option was still, and I'm like, it's not even I that those things I don't I don't get.

Vuyanzi 20:01

I don't understand.

Brendan 20:02

So anyway, yeah, I but long story short, we better fight everyone. Yeah, seriously. It doesn't matter which side you are. So please some of my friends on the left, I'm gonna smack some sense and you motherfuckers.

Vuyanzi 20:15

Yeah, yeah. You guys please vote. Please, please, please vote. Okay, primaries may be done, but there's an election coming up. Um, so get whatever papers you need to get, do whatever the hell you have to do.

Brendan 20:26

Unless you want to vote for what's currently happening, in which case stay home. I don't know why you'd be here watching us anyway. I mean, seriously, turn this off. Unsubscribe.

Vuyanzi 20:36

People hate watch. So well, I mean, case in point, the Dion Cole thing. So so let me not even say that. Okay. All right. So I knew that we couldn't end there, and we've put us given us some joy at the end here. So um, you want to share what's bringing you some queer joy?

Brendan 20:57

Sure. Um, so last weekend I was a vendor at the queer artist flea market, which we had in Cairn. This girl be lurking on my social medias and then be acting like she was on my videos. No, I do.

Vuyanzi 21:13

I was I was really lurking, especially when you were in the States. Lurking. I was lurking, but I had to stop lurking. And can you call me next time?

Brendan 21:23

I was doing tarot reading at the queer artist farmers market.

Vuyanzi 21:27

What? How did I miss that?

Brendan 21:31

Anyway. Um, and yeah, it was like very nice. I did like a bunch of readings all day long. People came out, we had a nice time. Um I was reading for all the girls.

Vuyanzi 21:46

Some of them did not want to listen, mostly the men, but well, somebody may need to do a little reading for me afterwards. Maybe will my luck change in love. Um, so that sounds so much. I got I got to meet um the woman who's like the head pastor at uh at the college metropolitan I think it's cosmopolitan metropolitan are the one to think about that um so it's like a community church organization like led by LGBTQ people and they hold services on Sundays what and she asked me if I would like to come and talk to them about like spirituality what so that would be oh I love the fact that you held this back for from me and I'm just hearing this now because he did not share before the show because it's hitting me like oh my gosh that's so no I prefer to have this very organic reaction and I'm like what oh my god that is so dope wow if you're watching and you're based in Nairobi we're hoping to do them more often so I'll make sure I tell her next time she still won't show up but no I will tell me tell me and I'll come so my black joy um it was just a moment my sister and I had the other day my sister who lives in California and it was just a moment because she was remembering when I was like six or seven years old and I got bullied in camp by the camp counselors no less and then she just like and her and my because they're all my sisters are older I was on one side of the lake because that's where the younger kids were and the bigger kids were on the other side of the lake and one of the activities was I was getting bullied already here on this side and one day one of the activities was to hike across the the the lake and I was the only one who signed up for that activity and I hiked across the lake and I saw her and I was so happy like that I saw my big sister. So the other day we were talking about that and my sister just had a moment because she felt so bad that I had been bullied by fucking adults but it was just this moment and it was nice. I didn't cry at that time but then when I started crying talking about it the next day I started crying but I just felt it was a great sisterly and my sister happens to be black um that it was a great shocker surprise spoiler alert so I just thought it was just a really nice sisterly black joy experience and with that with like we we had to calm down that adrenaline that was going in my body she was ready to go to go lower okay she was ready what she was ready so we thank you I don't know are there any final words any final thoughts okay okay I don't have any either I think um we give a lot of things for you guys to talk about a lot of fodder if you will so we'd love to hear from you please like click the thumbs up please subscribe we thank each other 15 subscribers shut up and so we'll give it more by the time this goes up absolutely so we're looking for more subscribe please like click share it with a friend yeah absolutely and we want to hear from you email us call us yeah or not call us speak for yourself don't call me unless you're tall dark and all so this is oh my gosh that's another conversation I don't send me that'll be another day because recently I did get one but anyway this has been I I did not like that this has been kisses kisses from Kenya